S2E3 (Aura): Sex Surveys and Polyam Adventures

AUDIO NOTE: APOLOGIES FOR THE GUEST TRACK BEING A LITTLE DISTORTED AT TIMES

• No Kacey this ep, but Stephanie is back
• Stephanie regales her European Vacation 2023 ™
• Aura walks us through their relationship situation.
  • Married for 7 years.
  • Dating a guy.
  • Also dating that guy’s best friend.
  • Lowkey in love with them.
  • Guy’s best friend also dating someone else.
• Autism communication!
• Aura shares their survey for previous partners
• CATS
• Aura tells us some more stories
  • Losing their virginity the first time (kind of)
  • Losing their virginity fully the 2nd time
• Church camp boner
• Aura’s Socials

Twitter: @_itsjustaura_

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Well, well, well, go ahead and open up your ears,
your mind and whatever else youneed.
You're listening to Talk DirtyTo Me.
Hello everybody, welcome toTalk Dirty To Me podcast, where

(00:28):
three friends with threedifferent perspectives talk
about sex, kink and otherlifestyle related things.
Today we have no Casey, but wedo have Stephanie back.
We just had our most glorioustrip from Europe, which please
be, updated.

Speaker 2 (00:43):
But it was amazing.

Speaker 1 (00:45):
Before we do that, I do want to introduce our guest
for this episode.
This is Aura, or as an oldfriend of mine.
I've known them for years andwe've watched each other grow
into our kinkier, slutty selvesas life has continued, and they
have so many interesting storiesand interesting perspectives on

(01:06):
things.

Speaker 3 (01:07):
Hi guys, I'm Aura.
It's really great to be heretoday, super excited.

Speaker 1 (01:12):
Yeah, yeah, okay.
So we are definitely going toget into hearing the stories and
just hearing beautiful thingsabout your life and talking
about sexy things.
Get your profile.
But before we do that,stephanie, tell us about your
trip please.

Speaker 2 (01:25):
Please, man, it was pretty magical.
It was one of those thingswhere Luke and I rented a car,
we landed in Italy, likeSouthern Italy, in Naples, and
drove all the way up to Germany,was kind of like we have
friends that live in Munich andthey had invited us to
Oktoberfest.
So we basically got the car andjust picked Airbnb's out and we

(01:49):
got so lucky because we kind oflike veered off the beaten path
, because I didn't want to dothings like roam roam.
So we stayed in Teeblee, whichwas like outside of Rome and in
a national park, and we stayedwith views that were just out of
this world, gorgeous.
And then we stayed on like afamily farm outside of Florence

(02:11):
and it was incredible.
And then we traveled toSlovenia and that was actually
my favorite country of all ofthe countries we visited, like
near and dear to my heart.
We stayed with a family ontheir farm.
There.
They made us homemade brandy.
We drank homemade brandy with a97 year old woman.
It was pretty incredible.
Then we moved on to Munich,germany, and had the ultimate,

(02:34):
ultimate Oktoberfest experience.
Like Luke wore Liederhosen, Iwore a dirndl and we went with
just a bunch of Germans toOktoberfest and it was so much
for my brain to take in.
It is such a I've never seenanything like that in my life.
And then we moved on toSwitzerland and it was
incredible.

(02:54):
And then I came home and I'mjust I'm.
You know there's people who arelike, are ready to come home
after a vacation, and that isnever me.
I if, since I was a kid, I justI'm never ready to come home.
I was so sad to leave, but Iwas so grateful for the
experience.
It was 16, amazing days.

Speaker 3 (03:08):
That sounds amazing yeah.
I mean I only really want tocome home for vacation with
stressful people?

Speaker 2 (03:13):
Yeah, Like yeah, totally.
I mean I just, I just, I, just,I just, I just, I, just, I, just
, I, just, I just, I just reallywanted to come home for
vacation.
For vacation, this was likemeeting so many incredible like.
Again, we got really luckybecause we didn't like have a
itinerary and I know that thatcan sound stressful to a lot of
people but we just picked theAirbnb the night before and
drove to that next location andit was like we picked places

(03:37):
that were hosted by peoplebecause we wanted to kind of
like meet people from that areaand learn the culture and eat
the food and, oh, the food andthis.

Speaker 3 (03:45):
I want to go back so bad.
It was so beautiful there,everyone was so nice and
welcoming, it was so nice.

Speaker 2 (03:53):
I like I cried when we left our Airbnb in in
Slovenia because they were justso incredibly welcoming and kind
and loving and it was just.
It was a lot of really goodhuman interaction experience.

Speaker 1 (04:06):
Beautiful, beautiful.
Yeah Well, I'm after one ofthese days when I'm more
independently wealthy.
I'm just, I'm going to goeverywhere.
I'm not going backpacking, Iwill be taking forms of
transportation and don't involveme walking, but I will go
everywhere.

Speaker 2 (04:19):
Selt.
No, you, you really can, youcan do it.
It's, it's doesn't have to beexpensive.
Like, especially like Italy was, we were having like a meal
with a bottle of wine and youknow an appetizer, and it was
like coming out to like 27 eurosLike it, just because we
weren't I wasn't eating in theheart of Rome, because I don't
want to be in busy places withbusy people.

(04:41):
I just that's not my style.
The internet is lovely.
I can look the Coliseum uponline.
We drove by it and it wasbleeding out people and I was
like that looks terrible.
Oh, thank you.

Speaker 1 (04:53):
I don't really care to go to like landmarks and
stuff that like that.
Their only benefit is to seethem visually and I'm like I can
look at them.
Right now I don't want to.
I'm like I know I can see whatNiagara Falls looks like, unless
I'm going to jump into it oranything.
I'm just like, yeah, there itis.

Speaker 2 (05:10):
Right, but like Glarus, sued Switzerland is not
like on any big maps or likethey don't have incredible crowd
bringing attractions, but itwas like like, visually, my eyes
has have never seen beauty likethat, ever in my life.
And we were on a farm and itwas cheap.
But it was like how is thischeap?

(05:32):
This is like what people pay somuch for that you know, like
you would think so people wouldpay so much for it.
It doesn't have to be crazyexpensive.
If you don't care about luxuryhotels which I do not or first
class seats or anything likethat, you can do Europe for a
good price.

Speaker 1 (05:48):
All right, I'll save my pocket change.

Speaker 2 (05:50):
We'll get it done.
Okay, I'll say this a week inDisneyland is a Disney world is
more expensive.

Speaker 1 (05:57):
Okay, well.
Well, you know I'm trying toget into that I will not
disparage Disney.
They'll come for me, all right.
So hi, aura.

Speaker 2 (06:05):
Hello Hi Aura.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
So we like to start off by you know, introduce all
of your, your.
How do you identify in, youknow, the kink media time world?
What would you call yourself assomebody asked?

Speaker 3 (06:19):
Well, I'd probably just start by saying I'm Aura.
I'm polyamorous that's usuallymy biggest one.
I'm demisexual pansexual.
Basically, if we vibe and wehave a good connection, it's
something I'm willing to seethrough generally, I know right
now I'm in a little bit of adifferent situation.
It's a little overwhelming attimes, but it's been a really

(06:41):
beautiful time I've been having.

Speaker 1 (06:43):
So what's this?
What is your situationcurrently?

Speaker 3 (06:46):
So I'm married to my wonderful husband of seven years
.
I'm also seeing this wonderfulguy, and I'm starting to see his
best friend as well, andthey're also seeing each other.

Speaker 1 (06:59):
The best friend and the guy.

Speaker 3 (07:00):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (07:02):
We'll go guy one, best best friend, guy for names.

Speaker 3 (07:06):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (07:07):
So I wanted best friend guy together and you just
started dating best friend guy.

Speaker 3 (07:12):
Well, actually the best friend is non binary.

Speaker 1 (07:14):
Best best friend, not best friend and be.

Speaker 3 (07:16):
Yeah, and be fem presenting Absolutely Drop dead
gorgeous.
I'm low key in love with them,but we haven't gone there yet.

Speaker 1 (07:26):
Well, they know now.
They know now.
This is, this is how, this ishow you tell people.

Speaker 3 (07:29):
Oh yeah, no, I'm just going to send this to them and
that's how I'm going to tellthem that's going to be my big
gesture.

Speaker 1 (07:34):
I did a whole podcast just to tell you that I love
you.
How do you feel?

Speaker 3 (07:37):
I mean, I'm actually, if you want to know, the whole
plan.
I don't know whether I want todo it at a pumpkin patch or I'm
going to take them to spiritHalloween and under their big
display of their little hauntedhouse thing, I was going to give
them a little little speech,maybe hold their hands.

Speaker 1 (07:55):
Yes, do that.

Speaker 3 (07:58):
And then I'll show them the podcast.

Speaker 1 (08:02):
Well then they'll know that it was premeditated
and you thought it throughbecause it had this wall
happened.
They actually do that.
That's going to be cute.

Speaker 3 (08:08):
They actually have a long term boyfriend as well, and
I've been talking to him aboutthis for a while.

Speaker 1 (08:14):
Yes See, you have just described my favorite thing
about polyamory.
You get a group of compersivepeople and you get to like, you
know, like gang love people,like from all different
directions and being like whatbetter resources there?
Being like I want to dosomething special for this
person than I really love.

Speaker 3 (08:29):
Hello, that person's husband Teach me yeah, no,
seriously, he hit up he hit upme and then I guess we'll just
say the guy partner is partnernumber one.
He had me in partner number oneand was like hey, their
birthday is coming up, what dowe want to do?
And so we just all three satthere and planned out their
birthday party, and it was sucha good time.

Speaker 1 (08:51):
Yeah, I'm currently seeing someone who has two other
partners and I know one of themreally well and I've worked
with it, worked with the thirdone and we have a running bit
that we call ourselves thecouncil.

Speaker 3 (09:04):
I love that so much.

Speaker 1 (09:05):
Like, there's like we've been in the council group
chapter like handle particularthings and make birthday special
and do any support things thatwe need to do.
And so and it's like it's great.
It's great.
That is a lovely new type ofconnection with a person, like
I'm not in a relationship withtheir other partners, but I know
them, we're cool, and that'slike another cool way to connect

(09:26):
with people, especially as oneof them's been a friend of mine
for a really long time.
Yeah, and so I was like I thinkit's great.
So you mentioned that it wasstressful, complicated,
difficult sometimes, or what'sgoing on there Sometimes.

Speaker 3 (09:37):
So partner number one has never really been Polly the
only experience he ever had wasa negative one but almost
everyone around him is Polly andso he has seen it work and
knows that it can, and we'rejust absolutely head over heels
in love with each other.
So he's been willing to makethis work and he's been going to
therapy working on his, his ownstuff.

(10:00):
The problem is sometimes wehave minor communication issues
which lead me and me being whoo,I have thought he has broken up
with me like twice, which wasnot the case.
It was just the words he usedwhich made me read into it a
different way.
And I mean, granted, valid,like the things that he said.

(10:21):
None of them were horrible.
Like he was totally valid inhis expression of emotions.
It was just it wasn't what hemeant.
It's like his words and actionswere not matching in, like the
opposite way, cause most of thetime when people say that you
know, it's like their words areall these big grand ideas and
like things that they'll do butthey never do them.
His was the opposite of like.

(10:41):
His words were like, oh, thiscan't happen, but what he meant
was he needed space and time toprocess his emotions, to not
project them onto me, cause heknows that he tends to do that.
So we have this like agreementof like this is what we need to
communicate.
But yeah, we recently had thathappen again and so I was like,
listen, I need you tospecifically say we are okay,

(11:04):
you did nothing wrong.
I just need my processing timefor a little bit.
We'll work through this like wealways do.
Just just something cause mybrain.
If you tell me anything elseand you tell me you're feeling
bad, I will immediately assumeit's my fault and that
everything's done.
It's like one thing goes wrong.
You're over it.

Speaker 1 (11:21):
Yep, I you know I'm autistic.
I got two autistic childrenfairly certain.
My partner is autistic.
I am all for script cheatsheets.

Speaker 3 (11:32):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (11:32):
And I'm like, listen, cause, like one of the ways
that I've described, like how mylanguage processing works with
autism, is like there is thething that's right in front of
my brain to say like what Iwould say automatically, without
doing any processing whatsoever, and my understanding of what
you're saying, that's what Iwould read as the very first
thing.
If it isn't that, then it'severything, yep, all at the same

(11:53):
time.
And now I'm 35 and I've beendoing this my whole life and
I've built trees and systems tobe like, okay, it's probably not
all of these things, by takingin these clues and these clues,
maybe this and maybe that, andso I'm going to proceed with the
information system being thisand hopefully that's right and
that's exhausting.
So I love it when it's justlike hey, if situation A happens

(12:17):
, say these words and we'll begood.
I'm like great, memorized, Iwill do that.
Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 3 (12:22):
Exactly, exactly that .
Yeah, I basically just gave hima script because little little
background on that last one.
So their birthday party it wasme, partner number one, partner
number two, which is them, andthen their partner was there.
Partner number one decides toleave and I had way too much to
drink that night and he wasjoking around with me and said

(12:44):
something about along the linesof oh, are you going to get with
a partner number two's partner?
And I was like, absolutely I am.
If anything, I'm going to dothem both.
Like I'm totally staying here,we're going to be in the same
bed, it's fine.
And like him not used to likehearing these things and we
don't generally talk about likethe intimate stuff just out of

(13:05):
comfort, he knows it's happeningand like the communication is
there on that, but no detailsneed to be shared.
Yeah, I'm going to similarthing with Sophia Right.
And her.
Their partner was never on mymind, necessarily.
We're definitely attracted toeach other, but I always ignored
.
It was just like no, I want tofocus on partner number two for
now.
Let this relationship blossombefore I even think about it,

(13:27):
cause I've been so overwhelmedwith partner number one.
My emotions are just veryintense over there, and so it's
hard to navigate as it is, and Ijust don't want to accidentally
add more to my plate.
Hey, I understand.
Well, that's poly saturated.

Speaker 1 (13:43):
It's a real thing, exactly.
I very much enjoy that word.

Speaker 3 (13:49):
By the way, I'm just like poly saturated, poly
saturated, but yeah, so anyway,I hadn't been thinking that the
entire night, like even before Igot to that point of drinking,
I was constantly thinking aboutkeeping both of my partners
happy.
Yet in that moment, like makingsure nobody was feeling any
type of way, no one was gettingmore attention than the other, I
was just very focused onkeeping everything going

(14:11):
smoothly, which I tend to put onmyself when I don't need to.
But I was about to bring up, butyeah, I'm very aware I don't
need to do that, but just withthe fact that they've been best
friends for so long, I alreadyfelt like I was getting in
between that when I got involvedwith partner number one in the
first place, which I'veexpressed to both of them and
we're like still kind of workingthrough these emotions because

(14:34):
partner number two feels thesame way and it's like
everything you know was goingsmoothly until I came back in
the picture romantically.
They expressed that to me onetime and it's obviously not true
.
We're all separate, there'sseparate things going on, but
you know, when there's previousrelationships to be had, it kind
of all just intertwined butanyway.
So he's not used to hearingthat stuff.

(14:55):
So it kind of set him on alittle spiral a little bit, but
I had no intentions.
That night, however, drinky andI ended up in bed with both of
partner number two and her,their partner, and they fell
asleep and he confessed hisattraction to me.
We ended up kissing, and so thenext morning when partner number

(15:16):
one confronted me about what Isaid, he was like has anything
been going on?
Cause, if it is, that'ssomething like, because it's
someone I know.
I feel like we should talkabout that and I was like to be
honest, I had no intentions ofit, but yes, and so that's when
partner number one said that hewas unsure about polyamory and,
like his, he was just likehaving a hard time dealing with

(15:38):
jealousy in the moment andthat's all he was saying was
like I don't know what to dobecause I'm feeling this way,
but I just don't know how tohandle these emotions at the
moment.
But I took it as like I justread the first line of like I
don't know if I can do polyamory.
This is really hard.
I took that and ran with it andI just with with him.

(15:58):
I have a problem of justaccepting things and you know,
in order to save the friendship,because he means so much to me,
and like the last thing I wantis for anything to end nasty and
for him not to be in my lifeanymore.
So if he's, if he startsfeeling a type of way or needs
to take a step back or endthings, I am fully supportive,
like, even if it hurts me, I'mlike, no, like, take it, like,

(16:20):
do your thing.
So I gave him space and then hecame over the following
Wednesday, came in, act in allcute hold in my hand, just being
like I missed you so much, I'mso glad to see you.
And I just started breakingdown crying like wait, it's not
over.
And he was like what are youtalking about?
I had been in such a deepspiral for days and like my

(16:43):
husband was sitting there, beingthe supportive, loving man that
he is, and it's just.

Speaker 1 (16:48):
I love that man, yeah , he's, he's a champion.

Speaker 3 (16:51):
He's a champion.

Speaker 1 (16:52):
Also known him for a long time.
He's the youth.
Yeah, Stephanie, you look atyour say something.

Speaker 2 (16:56):
Yeah, no, I was just thinking that's the sweetest
thing.
Like the support system youhave is amazing.

Speaker 3 (17:00):
I'm so very grateful for my support system.
I know years ago I wouldn'thave been able to see it, but I
don't know what changed to me.
But I'm really glad that I haveoh, what's the word for it?
I have the awareness.
Now, as much as I'm comfortedby my depression and sadness
that I go through, I'm veryaware that I'm not alone and I'm
.
I have wonderful people tosupport me.

(17:22):
I may have trouble reaching outwhen I'm feeling that way, but
I never worry about going toofar off the deep end because
these people are here for me.

Speaker 1 (17:31):
Yeah, we'll come get you.
Yeah, we all know how to swim,that's amazing, thank you,
amazing.

Speaker 2 (17:34):
Amazing, yeah, no.

Speaker 1 (17:37):
And I think that's another really beautiful thing
about poly.
And when people like asked meabout it and like what you do
and how do you do things, I waslike look, there's basically
three ground rules is you don'tlie to yourself.
Ever I was like in a monogamousrelationship.
Not being self aware can causeso many problems.
It is multiplied by 10,000s ifyou're lying to yourself, Cause

(17:57):
you know if you, if you don'tlet emotions out, they're going
to come out sideways.
When they come out sideways andit affects two, three, five, 10
people, it gets worse and worse.
So just don't lie to yourself.
Right, you can decide what youare and aren't going to say, but
just be honest with yourself.
To be like I feel jealous, I'mmad about this, this doesn't
feel good.
Just, it is true.
Don't lie to yourself.

Speaker 3 (18:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (18:16):
Number two.
The number two is say do allthe talking, Say all the words,
communicate those feelings thatyou're not lying to yourself
about, because everybody has tohave as much information as they
can to make good choices.
And then rule number three isget a shared Google calendar.

Speaker 3 (18:30):
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 (18:31):
Just because it's that's the thing that'll get you
, because this might be theautistic part, but, like I have
many things, I have things colorcoded in such a way.
So I have like a visual colorsignal of like neglect.
And so, because I'm enjoying mylife, I'm like Stephanie, I'm
going to go out to Europe and gowhat feels good and what leads
good and I will easily be likesuper jamming the experience I'm

(18:53):
having with a person and nothave looked up and text someone
for three weeks.

Speaker 3 (18:57):
Absolutely.

Speaker 1 (18:58):
That feels bad.

Speaker 3 (18:59):
I am.
I am the same way I've come.
I haven't felt the need for aGoogle Calendar as of recently,
as I'm only really seeing myhusband and my two partners, but
back in the day I used toactually carry around with me a
physical.
I called it my Dick appointmentcalendar.
It was just this little planner.
I was also in my K-pop phase,so it was BTS, of course, which

(19:22):
is hilarious because, like youknow, BTS is like the.
I guess they really popped offwith the kids in the US, so they
were seen as like a kid boyband and I mean I I knew it
wasn't necessarily that, but inthe US it was, and so I thought
it was funny that that was myDick appointment calendar and I
use that so often in the timeswhen I would forget to use it, I

(19:44):
would find myself doublebooking myself.

Speaker 1 (19:48):
Yeah, oh man.

Speaker 2 (19:50):
Laura, have you and your husband been Polly from the
beginning?

Speaker 3 (19:53):
No, we met when I was 15.
He had no interest in me, ofcourse he was.
He was 19 when we met and hecompletely brushed me off, as he
should.
But we were friends because weworked together.
So we got close.
He kind of tutored me throughhigh school and then I graduated
and by that point we had kindof acknowledged that we felt

(20:14):
romantically towards each otherjust because it had been so long
and we just clicked so well.
He took me to Austin.
We just never left for mygraduation trip.
But no, it was probably aboutfour years, almost four years
into it.
It was a couple months beforewe got married, where he sat me
down and he wanted to make aTinder account to boost his self

(20:38):
confidence is what he said andfirst thought, first reaction
was absolutely not.
It's not that I don't trust you, but I don't trust other people
on there, you know.
And he's like I don't want tochat with anybody.
I just, you know, want to seeif I get matches and I was like
nope.
But then that made me thinkabout it and for about a week I
couldn't stop thinking about how, what if he did meet someone on

(20:59):
Tinder?
What if they were really cool?
What if he had a really gooddate?
What if they had sex after?
And I realized I didn't reallycare about those things.
I was, I would have just beenhappy that he was going out
there and socializing.
And so I went up and then Ithought about how I got with him
when I was so young.
I never really got to experiencedating as an adult and or at

(21:21):
least having sex with otherpeople.
You know, I mean, I was kind ofit's kind of wild as a teenager
.
But you know, at the time I waslike did I really experience
anything, though I was ateenager?
So I sat down with him againand I brought it up and I was
like you know what, if you wantto make a Tinder account, that's
fine, but I would like theability to do so as well.
And then that kind of opened upthe conversation of well, what

(21:43):
if?
And then we just kept askingeach other these questions and
it turned out he was on theexact same page I was.
We weren't in a place to do anykind of romantic relationships,
so we were probably consideredmore E&M back then.
But sorry.

Speaker 2 (21:57):
Ethical non-monogamy.

Speaker 4 (21:59):
So which is which it falls under the umbrella of
polyamory.

Speaker 3 (22:02):
But it's kind of like yeah.
Just no romantic feelings, justfriends with benefits or yeah.

Speaker 2 (22:09):
That's interesting to me that that is considered like
that.
The word ethical like does iteven have a problem with that?
Because, like what makessomething ethical and then the
other thing not ethical, likejust because there's romantic
feelings that all of a suddenmakes it not?

Speaker 3 (22:22):
ethical anymore.
It doesn't have to do theromantic aspect, it's basically
ethical.
Non-monogamy is where there'scommunication involved.
Well, non ethical non-monogamywould be like cheating or hiding
things, things outside of theboundaries.

Speaker 1 (22:37):
I see, okay, yeah, and a lot of people in, like the
polyamorous community areworking to change that phrase to
consensual non-monogamy.
Oh, okay, because they have thesame, they have the same quam
that you do that it's like.
It's like well, it's not likewe call monogamy ethical
monogamy, and it further makesthe case that, like one is good

(22:58):
and one is bad.
But you know, I am exhaustedwith certain forms of like tone,
policing and virtuallysignaling about stuff from just
especially being autistic.
I'm like can we just just justgive me a list of what the words
I'm supposed to say are, please?

Speaker 3 (23:12):
That's what I want.

Speaker 2 (23:13):
Give me a list.

Speaker 1 (23:14):
I know, I was like y'all aren't saying what you
mean and I was like what do youmean?
What do you want?
I was like, just look at thepeople in front of you, yeah,
ask them what they need and wantand do that.
That's the rule.
What do we want to call that?
We'll pick three random letters, we'll call it that and
everybody knows it.
We got it Good.
Okay, I'm getting it.
Sure.

Speaker 2 (23:32):
Okay, Gotcha, I was like I was thinking you were
meaning like before you involvedromantic relationships.
That's what made it ethicallynon-monogamy.

Speaker 3 (23:41):
Yeah, it's just communication, but I, I see I
said, I totally understand.

Speaker 1 (23:45):
I've definitely heard people who have that boundary
for sure that it's just like youcan't have romantic feelings
about other people, and Iflinched when I hear that.
I'm just like well, good luck.
Yeah, I hope that worked out.

Speaker 3 (23:56):
Looking back, I kind of was like, wow, you're
literally like that, you'restill cutting yourself off at a
point, Like, say, you make areally great connection and then
it's just cut off like, oh well, now I have romantic feelings.
So this doesn't feel rightanymore because I know when I'm
with that person I'm going to beexpressing that and that's
technically breaking thatboundary within my relationship

(24:19):
with my husband.
But over time, you know, I metup, I went on a lot of dates, I
slept with a lot of people.
It didn't really change until Imet up with an old friend's
partner.
She happened to be visitingAustin and she was going through
a breakup and invited me overto her hotel room.

(24:40):
And that's how I found out thatthey were Polly too.
Because she was like I broke upwith my girlfriend and I was
like aren't you with him?
Like what did y'all break up?
And she was like no, we'rePolly.
And I was like someone else.
It's not just me doing thisshit.
You can have, like you do,romantic relationships.

(25:00):
How does that work?
Like I, because I was stilldealing with a lot of jealousy
stemming stemming frominsecurities.
I think it was more internalinsecurities and insecurities in
my relationship, because I'vealways felt pretty solid with my
husband.
But I definitely wasn't in aplace.
But I had realized shortlyafter that.
I was like, oh what if I havefeelings for her?

(25:21):
And so I talked to him about it.
I talked to my husband about itand at first he had the same
reaction.
When he asked me about thetender, he was like I'm not
comfortable with that.
That's not something I reallysee happening.
We can talk about this a littlebit later, and so we gave it a
little bit more time.
Nothing ever happened with her.
I still love her.

(25:42):
We're still great friends, butit was kind of more like a.
This is an idea in my head andI don't really know how I'm
feeling yet.
It was just also new to me.

Speaker 2 (25:51):
Wow, y'all's communication is, like, so
beautiful and it's so incrediblethat you, like you said you got
together so young, but thatyou've allowed each other to
grow.
You've grown together, like it,and it doesn't it's not
necessarily meant that you'vehad to grow apart.
You know, like and I think thatthat is something that there's
a lot of people out there thatfear holds them back from

(26:11):
allowing themselves to even grow, let alone their partner, and
so it's really cool that y'allhave given each other the space
and the like permissions thewrong word, because we don't
need permission from otherpeople, but just just the
freedom being on each other'steam is really rad.
Right, that's the right word.

Speaker 1 (26:27):
Yeah and like.
And for people who like, don'tknow the like cause, again, I've
known.
I've known Nora since forever.
Like me and their older siblinghave been friends since I was
in college, coming up on 20years.
So when I heard about her I wasit to begin with and I was like
I definitely was just likerelative that I know I'm

(26:48):
watching you send the text andnow come kick people.
But I literally I watched verycarefully because you know that
that set up could have, couldlead to bad things, but he was
nothing but a gentleman.
He did everything right.
He's still doing everythingright.
I've known him for years andyears and years and full vouch,
he's solid.

Speaker 3 (27:06):
Definitely oh that's amazing.
It's kind of funny.
So we ended up gearing into itLike I was going towards a
romantic relationship when thisguy I met on Tinder totally
manipulated me into arelationship, but this is kind
of how our conversations kind ofstarted Well, not started, but

(27:27):
we started seriously considering, like fully being open and free
and just trusting each otherand letting those connections
grow and not holding back fromanything like that Cause there
was a couple of dudes I met thatwere really cool and I kind of
thought about pursuing more.
Never worked out, but it wouldhave been nice to like maybe
explore that back then.

(27:47):
I'm kind of glad it didn't,though, because other things
have come out since then.

Speaker 2 (27:53):
Like.

Speaker 3 (27:53):
I was not making the best choices back then of the
people I was seeing was I just?
I think I was just too excitedto be out and about again.

Speaker 1 (28:01):
if I'm honest, oh yeah, we've all.
We've all done it and I got, Ihad a.
I've had a couple of people onmy pile list and I'm like, oh, I
should have done that.

Speaker 3 (28:10):
I learned a lot from that first relationship since
being married and I learned alot of signs to look out for
which I promptly ignored.
In the second relationship Ihad, I was like, oh, these are
some great things to look outfor.
And then it happened again 10folds.
I dated somebody for like overa year and a half recently Well,

(28:31):
I guess it was almost a yearago now, it's not that recent.
He moved.

Speaker 1 (28:34):
Yeah, mr, I don't eat pussy.
Yeah, mr oh yeah, I guessthat's who I've been for.
Oh, I mean actually he's nothe's not going to listen?
No, no, he's not.
I actually don't care if helistens.

Speaker 3 (28:48):
I really don't.
He can listen to it all hewants.

Speaker 2 (28:51):
But I would.
I would imagine there's morethan one Mr.
I don't eat pussy.

Speaker 1 (28:55):
You know what I mean.
You're, you're, you have lotsof company.

Speaker 3 (28:59):
Yeah, probably.
Let's see, I I actually I keeptrack of everyone I've ever
slept with.
I have a list on my phone.
I have all the names in orderwhen they happened and the
teenage ones I did.
I thought he kept when you saidkept keep track.

Speaker 2 (29:14):
I was like, like you like check in with them Like,
like, you like keep up.

Speaker 3 (29:17):
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 (29:21):
That was one of my favorite segments of your life.

Speaker 3 (29:24):
It was when the pandemic happened and, like I
was kind of freshly, so weopened up in December of 2019
and we got married the dayeverything shut down due to
COVID in March.
So I had four months of hookingup with people before you know,
we just all stayed home and itwas illegal.

(29:48):
And so I was bored one day and Iwas like, man, it would be
really funny if I just sent asurvey to all of these people
I've ever slept with, includingthe teenage years, the ones that
didn't traumatize me.
So I did that and for a whileafter things opened up again and
I started seeing people again.
Sometimes, if they were reallycool, I would be like hey, do

(30:10):
you want to take my survey realquick?

Speaker 2 (30:15):
Can I can I know the?

Speaker 3 (30:16):
question Hold on.

Speaker 1 (30:17):
Let me figure out which account that was one of my
, one of the funniest days of mylife.
I actually might be able tofind it too.
I think when you were firstsending it, you sent it to me
for like reviewing or you weretalking about it and I was like
I have to see the survey.
No, yeah, you asked me to likereview and be like what is it?
Should I send this?
And I'm like well, live yourlife, don't send it to the scary

(30:38):
one.

Speaker 3 (30:39):
Yeah, okay, man, I wish I could screen Actually, if
you guys want to see it.

Speaker 1 (30:45):
Yeah, yes, please.

Speaker 3 (30:46):
Okay, okay, so it's.
Can you see it Cool?

Speaker 1 (30:50):
Yep, I remember the school before.

Speaker 3 (30:51):
So you slept with me?
I would love to hear yourthoughts or feedback from my own
personal entertainment.
I'm bored Call it a personalsocial experiment.
So I'd ask for their name andif they would like to remain
anonymous.
If I decided to make a TikTokwhich I never did, where.
How we met.
What was your favorite thingabout me?
What made you know firstimpressions, what made you want
to have sex with me?

(31:12):
And then I have these like,numbered one to 10, how
attracted were you to me at thetime?
One I was desperate.
10.
Wow, goddess Head.
Game One never got it, or itwas awful, oh Jesus.
Or 10.
Gluck gluck 9000, you know,cootie game One, what game?

(31:33):
10.
Gorilla Grip, how good do youthink?
I thought it was fun to ask howthey think they did, and that
one really interested me.
I'll show you the responsesOverall.
How was it?
One I regret everything.
10, please call me again Areasfor improvement.
Anything else you want me toknow?
We'll just let's see.

Speaker 1 (31:52):
Yeah, nobody else will see me.
Yeah, like you really.

Speaker 3 (31:55):
Cool, let's see, let's get some favorites.
Favorite thing about me a lotof ass, respectfully, that
figure was pristine and youlooked mad, fuckable.
Okay, dude, here we go.
How attracted were you to me atthe time?
The only one who answered onewas my husband.

Speaker 1 (32:12):
And that's because, when we met I was 15.
So we love him for that.
That literally was like I lovethat I know Like.
I'd none at, zero, none at all.

Speaker 3 (32:25):
I remember because at first when I saw it was like
why the fuck did you give me aone?
He was like you were 15.
I had, I didn't want anythingto do with you, you know what I
respect it I actually.
I really respect that Head gamegenerally 10.

Speaker 1 (32:43):
So you said you identify relationship wise,
Polly and demisexual andpansexual.
How do you identify kink andBDSM wise?

Speaker 3 (32:52):
So I definitely identify as a switch.
I feel like I'm like a pickyswitch because it really depends
.
I generally lean more sub forsure.
I really just like someonetaking control of me because I
tend to be a control freak in mylife.
That's totally where that comesfrom, but I love it when
someone takes control.
However, if they have a problem, someone takes control.
However, if they have aspecific personality type, I

(33:13):
will easily go into like softdom mommy mode.

Speaker 1 (33:17):
Oh yeah, now there's, there's, there's a particular
type of surrender that can't beignored.

Speaker 3 (33:22):
Cannot.
I remember my first experiencedoing that and uh ah, oh, please
Please.
Okay, so I met this wonderfulman off tender Wonderful,
actually.
I think they recently changedtheir pronouns to they them.
So they are this beautifulperson.
I haven't talked to them in solong, but we call ourselves like
twins because we just had thesame personality through and

(33:45):
through.
I can't remember where we wentfor our first date.
All I know is that our seconddate was at a sex shop and they
cross dressed for the first timein public to do this, that's so
beautiful, and it was just partof the experience, because we
planned, it was myfirst pegging and we planned for
it.
So I picked them up.
They were wearing their cutelittle outfit and I was just

(34:05):
like, oh my God, you look sogreat.
We drove all the way down southto the big, the big sex shop
down there and we picked out astrap and a dildo and then we
went back to their place and wejust started making out and I
was feeling very nervous becauseI had never like domed before.
Like I, I could get kind oflike not intense, but I can take

(34:29):
aggressive.
Yeah, I can get a littleaggressive sometimes, but never
in like full dom mode, which iswhat they wanted.
So but something clicked in mewhen they did their first little
whimper.

Speaker 1 (34:39):
That's every.
This is a story every time,every switch I know, especially
if they've like started theirlives up is.
I was just like you know, Ididn't think and then someone
just the whimpered at me or,puppy, a dog eye looked me and I
found it.
I found it deep in my soul, yep.

Speaker 3 (34:57):
Yep, it's that whimper every time and it was
just beautiful.
I had them laying down and wejust slowly ease into it and
then I realized how great it was.
Just the view, the feeling oflike being inside someone, like
that.
I know it's.
I know it's not me, necessarilyit's the toy, but I felt it.

(35:18):
I felt every inch of them andit was just so beautiful.
It's the first and only timeI've done it.
I can't wait to do it again.
I was years ago.
I hope I can do it again oneday.

Speaker 1 (35:30):
Oh man, just you, just you know, wave a strap on
in the middle of the street,somewhere, you'll have it,
you'll have a deep audience.
It's a highly in demandactivity.

Speaker 3 (35:40):
I know it makes me wish I was still in my whole
phase a bit.

Speaker 1 (35:43):
Yeah, I currently have a regular getting pegged
from person now, and God blessthe USA, we love pegging, we
love pegging.
Okay, it's great, everybody doit.
All the lube, all of it.

Speaker 3 (35:58):
So important.
I don't have as much experiencewith anal.
I've been trying to practicemore on myself because I have
recently kind of ignited thatspark of need in myself.
I had a little accident in oneof my recent sexual encounters
with partner number one.
He was just going very hard andI angled myself a little too
high and we had a little triplesurprise because he didn't stop.

(36:20):
He didn't realize what he wasdoing at first.
So he didn't stop.
So I got a full three pumps ofin the asshole no lube, no prep.
But the entire week I wasrecovering after that I just
kept thinking about how goodthat could feel.

Speaker 1 (36:35):
I literally was about to be like.
I want Stephanie take it fromhere.

Speaker 2 (36:44):
I love it, but it took me so.
But the thing is I will saythis I don't care how many times
on the podcast, because maybesomeone's first time hearing it
took me so long to get to thatpoint and I refuse to let it be
painful ever.
I'm a late bloomer in life, I'min the slow lane, but with that
comes like nope, we're going todo this.

(37:04):
My way, and my way is, is notto be painful ever.
As soon as it's painful, we'regoing to stop, we're going to
pull back and then we'll push alittle and then we'll pull back.
And I was still able to likeclimax through all of the like
trying like all of the small.
You don't have to go big or gohome in that area, people just
go at your own speed.
And then when you do, I justfeel like, for females in

(37:26):
general, we've been missing outlike that.
They've been hoarding thissecret from us yeah, it's
actually from humans just all ingeneral, like we just don't
talk about anal enough and analstimulation in my personal
opinion, and that's all I meanliterally.

Speaker 3 (37:42):
Monday night, like we me and partner number one I
mean, granted, none of mypartners really do anal my
husband's not a fan, whichtotally cool.
Like we don't really have, likeI've never really had the drive
for it before Partner numbertwo we kind of just are a little
shy right now, so intimacy isfew and far between, which is
totally okay.

Speaker 1 (38:02):
Still holding hands.

Speaker 3 (38:03):
Still holding hands.
I'm just very nervous.
It's my first like queerrelationship and so I'm still
like learning to navigate that.
But yeah, so partner number oneand I we were getting freaky on
Monday and whole on 69 in whichwe hadn't done in a while and
he just he just started ticklingand went in and I was like this

(38:24):
is the best 69 I've ever had.
Please don't stop.

Speaker 1 (38:28):
People give, people give 69 such a bad rap and I was
like, listen, I understand thecomplaint.
Right, the geometry requiressome mapping, right, the body
math has to happen, yeah, butit's, it's worth the effort.
It's worth the effort.
You know, like most of the 69sare going to put the work,
effort into work.
Totally worth my time.
It's just such good access toall the different places and so

(38:48):
I've never, I've never been thetop person in the 69.
That's not true.
I have one and champion.
Champion and young woman.
Round of applause 400 pounds,400 pounds of African furia.
She just just scuba dived herway through that Plus.
That's amazing.
What Well done oh my gosh.

Speaker 3 (39:04):
I love that.

Speaker 1 (39:05):
Hold on real quick, stephanie, did we lose you or is
this just a private thingthat's happening?
Come on Taking my phone.
Ok, hoi, everything OK.

Speaker 2 (39:12):
So I'm sorry.
My cat had a, like a, jumped upon my thing where all my
candles were and they were litand the handle is.
Just just thought my house isgoing to get through.

Speaker 3 (39:23):
I was like come on, keenan.

Speaker 2 (39:25):
And my cat.
I swear on my life.
He did it on purpose, likethat's.
The other thing about this catis I've been muting this because
he's meowing, because I'm notpaying attention to him, and
when you don't, he gets yourattention in the most like way,
diabolical ways.

Speaker 3 (39:39):
I just like way and she's a kid, you, she's a kid,
so sorry, we're discovering alot of things as we go.
She is slowly.
She gets cuter, but also moredemonic as the days go by.
She is now started faceattacking Sure.
Oh yeah, that's been fun.

Speaker 2 (39:55):
Yeah, when you're asleep.
Yeah, oh yeah, mm.
Hmm, the best I'm 100 percent.

Speaker 1 (39:59):
I believe everybody who has a cat is a mask.
Yes, because everybody I knowhas a cat says a phrase to some
form or fashion that is like oh,you know, be careful.
She'll, like, scratch you alittle bit in the face or the
arm, but you don't get cut thatdeep.
And I'm like I want you to saythat about a human being, Right?
Just say I was like, oh, here'smy, here's my friend George.
You know, every once in a whilehe'll scratch you a little bit

(40:20):
on the arm or face.
He's only cut me, like my cat'sname is George Bro.
That's just cuts you in the faceand arm and we're just like,
yeah, that's great, I love it.

Speaker 2 (40:28):
And bites my cat bites If they're playful bites,
but they draw blood every time.
I just like look you, that's.

Speaker 3 (40:34):
That's partner number two.
They love to bite me.
I don't know if you can stillsee no, I guess not but there is
like a oh yeah, this.

Speaker 2 (40:43):
Yeah yeah.

Speaker 1 (40:43):
Right here.
Oh, I see it.

Speaker 3 (40:45):
Yeah, oh yeah.

Speaker 2 (40:46):
I could see it.

Speaker 3 (40:47):
Party, like two weeks ago.
They, they bit me hard and theyjust love to do that.
They'll like grab my arm orlike just lean into my shoulder
or something and just bite mehard and I'm like you know, I
don't hate this, I really don'tlike.
Can you, can you show me alittle more?
Keep going.

Speaker 1 (41:08):
Oh, man, I mean, I just had to get used to getting
bit, knowing your sibling for solong.

Speaker 3 (41:13):
Oh, yeah, she, she loves to bite.

Speaker 1 (41:17):
It's you know so bite .
I guess I do accept love bitesfrom human beings.
But like we said, every I thinkeverybody's got a little mask.
It's tendencies in them, atleast everybody with a cat.

Speaker 3 (41:25):
Yeah, a little bit.
I definitely want tointerrogate my cat anyway.

Speaker 1 (41:29):
OK, so we got.
We got the heck pecking to theold friend.
We other prison have.
We've had 69 that went wellwith partner number two.
Just you have any other sexystories on your heart and soul?

Speaker 2 (41:40):
that you want to share.

Speaker 1 (41:41):
Because I've heard I've heard plenty of your
stories there, which is why I'mglad you're in my life, because
it was just like I love havingsomebody to be like.
Here's this wild, horny thingthat happened to me, hi.

Speaker 3 (41:50):
So I've got two on my mind.
I can try to make them OK cool.
So the first one was when Ilost my virginity.
I kind of I don't know how toword it because like when I said
it originally I kind of Irealized that the wordings kind
of off.
But I had two sexualexperiences, two consensual
sexual experiences, with losingmy virginity.

(42:10):
The first one just didn't goall the way in and I didn't know
me and this guy he was thefirst guy who ever called me
cute and I had a lot ofself-esteem issues.
He was also really cute, butself-esteem issues.
My friends were already havingsex.
I was 13 and I was like, oh myGod, it's going down, let's go.
So we broke into a building.
I mean, it's a building weconsistently broke into.

(42:37):
It was like an old, abandoned,like office, strip mall center.

Speaker 1 (42:41):
Oh yeah, that makes it better.

Speaker 3 (42:43):
We used to call it FA , because forever alone was the
meme at the time and the funnything about calling it forever
alone is that's where we asgroups would go to smoke, have
sex, drink, do all of theteenager things, but it was
called forever alone, anyway.
So I go there to hook up withhim and it was a lot of foreplay

(43:06):
and I thought I felt like Ifelt him go in, like he
definitely went in but he hadtrouble staying hard also.
So but I felt so good, I feltso confident.
He ended up.
He told me he didn't want todate because he wasn't ready to
be in a relationship, ended updating my best friend the next
day.
He had slept with her the nightbefore, like me and her had an
agreement to both sleep with himat separate times, but he ended

(43:28):
up dating her.
So that kind of sucked.
But I went to school the nextday with basically Hickeys in
the form of like autopsymarkings, like I had the Y on my
chest going all the way down,and then I had Hickeys all up
and down my legs, like he lovedgiving Hickeys.
So I was covered in bruises.
I had a gym teacher pull measide the next day asking if I

(43:50):
was OK at home, and that was.

Speaker 1 (43:52):
I most definitely.

Speaker 3 (43:55):
I wish I could remember what my exclamation
like, what my explanation wasfor that.
I think I had something to dowith me saying I was rough
housing with my sibling who Ididn't live with, and everyone
knew I lived in a singlehousehold, so I don't know, and
I would imagine any adult atthat age knows what a Hickey
looks like.

Speaker 2 (44:14):
So they probably were like, ok, this is not Arkansas,
so I doubt.

Speaker 3 (44:18):
That's Obviously kids and kids and kids saw it and I
was like oh yeah, I had sex, andso that went through the whole
school, I was.
I was the first one in my gradeto have sex.
So like at the school everyonewas pretty, like, pretty
conservative, so it was liketaboo that someone in the

(44:39):
seventh grade had sex.
Anyway, this got around to oneof my longtime friends who I
actually just saw a couple daysago.
He was in Austin and he stoppedby and visited me and we just
had a really good time, notrekindling but reminiscing, so
anyway, you're of your breakingand entering and somewhat
entering.
He approached me after hearingthis news and was like so I

(45:03):
heard that you did this thingand I really want to experience
that, so that when I get agirlfriend, I know what I'm
doing.
Would you be OK with somethinglike that?
And I was like oh, I got you, Ihad sex, I know what I'm doing.

Speaker 2 (45:18):
When and where baby.

Speaker 3 (45:20):
So this is literally two weeks after I had lost my
like lost my virginity.
So we go to the park behind theschool and we there's a
basketball court and about 20feet away were two thin trees,
and then behind that was like afence to a parking lot and we
thought that behind these twotrees was the best spot to go.

(45:40):
And so we get there, we makeout for a little bit and then
he's like hey, do you think youcould maybe like go down on me?
And I'm like, absolutely, I gotthis.
I wasn't used to that size.
He was yeah, and so I wasgetting nervous.
I didn't actually know what Iwas doing and I looked up and he

(46:03):
was looking down at me with noreaction and I legit stopped and
said stop looking at me.
And then I kept going.

Speaker 1 (46:12):
Did he stop looking at you?

Speaker 3 (46:13):
Yes, he did.
He was like he was looking downand then just snapped his head
back and looked straight to thesky.

Speaker 2 (46:21):
Your dumb clicked in for just two seconds.

Speaker 1 (46:24):
You know what, when I was, when I was like teenager,
I remember like my first blowjobs when I was like 17,.
It's actually really nerve,it's a really awkward time
because you're mostly likenervous, anxious and like
panicking, but also it's thebest thing that has ever
happened to you in your entirefucking life.
So you're just like I was likeoh my God, don't fuck it up,

(46:46):
what do I do?

Speaker 3 (46:47):
I think that's part of the reason I find it or I
know I used to.
It's less now because I'm solike romantically feelings
involved now, but when we firstopened up and I was like just
meeting new people and sleepingaround, that was one of my
favorite parts of the experience.
Was like that newness that youdon't know what they like, you
don't know what they want,you're just going into it blind

(47:08):
and it's not as magical as whenyou're a teenager, but it still
has its own magic to it.
That reminds you of that, or atleast for me.

Speaker 1 (47:16):
Yeah, oh, I mean, like to this day I'm never.
One of the things I'vemaintained fascination with my
whole life is like the oralorgasm puzzle will never get
tired or never get tired.
I was like if I had, if I hadmy way and the time and the
resources, I would figure outthe Rubik's cube of oral sexing
everyone to their greatestpleasure.
That's what I would spend therest of my life doing easily.

(47:38):
But no, so yeah, I feel you andit's it's because my like my
first blow job giving was like,it was special, it was a magical
time there's I know I've talkedabout on a podcast before I
tell you remember what episodewhere I blew my neighbor's that
we'll put it in the show notesand I've told that whole story,
but it's, yeah, been been secondto ever since.

Speaker 3 (47:59):
It's, it's one of orals, one of my favorite things
.
I just I feel like it's.
It's a really good way tofigure somebody out and what
they like, and because you can,that's how you find out, like
the speed, the roughness or thesoftness that they're into, and
then you can translate that intoyou know, other sex positions
or whatever else you're doing,but also the satisfaction of
making someone finish with yourmouth unmatched, yep it feels

(48:22):
great every time, yeah, and it'slike and yeah, that's why I
like to say I was like there arethings I can only learn about
you with my mouth in betweenyour leg.

Speaker 1 (48:29):
There's lots of information there that's only
translatable through the back ofmy throat and I also ignore me.
I haven't had sex in a month.
I'm going to touch anotherhuman being in a month, but I'm
out of jail on Friday, and soyeah, I got syphilis.
You listen to the first episode.
I talked about it, and so myantibiotics finish on Friday,

(48:51):
which they messed up.
It should have been done twoweeks ago, but we're almost out
of time.

Speaker 3 (48:55):
I had that happen to me once.
I had.
I had chlamydia.
I went in for like routinetesting came up with chlamydia,
took the antibiotics, did thething.
I happened to have agynecologist appointment pretty
soon after treatment and ofcourse it still came back
positive for chlamydia and Itold them I was like I just
finished treatment, I haven'tbeen intimate.

(49:15):
They're like, well, you'restill showing up positive, so
we're going to give you anotherround of antibiotics.
I found out recently at thekind clinics.
They were like why would theydo that to you?
You can, you can test positivefor like two weeks after, but
you're clean, like they'redoctors, they should know that.
And I was like man, that waslike the hardest time of my life
because I was like deep inhofaze and I was like seeing a

(49:37):
new person every other day andlike I had a routine, I had
schedules, I had pre-plannedstuff.
And then they did that to meand I just went with it because
I didn't know.
I was like, oh shit, I guessthe antibiotics didn't work.

Speaker 1 (49:51):
Yeah, mine was like you know, I test every six
months all the time.
Like the system it works.
The way that I have set up mysexual safety system did its job
.
I found out pretty much rightafter it happened.
None, I informed everybody,nobody got it.
But literally, I found out theday before I was going to a sex
party that I was auditioning mylike orgasm sounds to.
You know how many peopleapproached me at that party?

(50:13):
Oh man, I'm like no, I'm injail, I gotta wait.

Speaker 2 (50:18):
At least it's 2023 and not 1800s, like you would be
dead.

Speaker 1 (50:23):
We're not.
I'm not Johnny Depp in theLibertine.
My nose is falling off.
Yeah, it's pretty much like.
As far as like medically it's anon-event.
It's just like I takeantibiotics for a few days If I
forget to eat, then I feelnauseous and then I'm done Like.
The hardest part was just likethe conversations with the
people affected.
But you know, it's 2023.
Everybody has everybody that Iinteract with has pretty solid

(50:45):
sexual health, like knowledgeand stuff.
So everybody was just like cool.
You know, can we make someupdates to your extracurricular
sexual practices?
And I'm like it's already done.
You know that rule if somethingin the system didn't work
anymore.
So I've changed a couple ofthings which we get.
But man if ever gets that out ofjail blowjob, I'm happy for him
.

Speaker 3 (51:06):
Yeah, man, do you want to hear the second story?

Speaker 1 (51:09):
Yeah, yeah, but we'll call it.
We'll call it.

Speaker 3 (51:11):
OK, ok, I'll make this one quick.
I feel like this is my craziest, so like that was my virginity.
This is my craziest experienceto date as far as how it went.
So met this guy off atender.
We met at one of those bararcade places and we we hit it
off immediately.
We were like great friends, butI was getting worried because
he hadn't kissed me yet and wewere there for a few hours and

(51:33):
he's a photographer.
So we went to this little pierthat was behind the place and it
overlooks the city.
So we're on that pier.
It's like midnight, no one'sout except for this guy that
kept following us around, whichI hooked up with him later, but
not the same night, but I hadgotten his number previously,

(51:53):
and so I admit that was ahorrible experience, but anyway.
So we're on this pier and we'retalking, and he asked me about
my serendipity tattoo and I toldhim that it was like it's one
of my favorite songs, but alsoit's a homage to like Bob Ross,
and the second Bob Ross left mymouth.
His demeanor completely changedand he grabbed me by the chin

(52:15):
and kissed me right there andsaid why did you have to talk
about Bob Ross?
And I was like oh, bob Ross,look at the bitch up, let's go.
Anyway, I ended up blowing himright then and there, like the
make out got so hot and heavy, Iblew him right there on the
pier and I I'm not one forpublic anymore.
I got into quite a bit oftrouble when I was a teenager

(52:38):
and so I'm not reallycomfortable with super public
stuff.
I love the idea of it, I lovebeing watched.
I'm definitely in that categoryof like voyeurism, but I don't
like it when it's like nonconsensual.

Speaker 2 (52:51):
Is it?

Speaker 3 (52:51):
it's illegal when you say you got, when you say you
got in trouble, like it's, it'sillegal, yeah, they've been
caught by police before, butbecause we were teenagers, they
kind of just let us go and waslike here's a warning, but I'm
an adult now, and so I have whatI'm asking is it illegal to get
caught giving a low job inpublic?

Speaker 1 (53:08):
Technically you can get an indecent exposure.
Technically for a blow job, oh,I see.
Ok, the guy could get anindecent exposure charge.
It's not technically illegal togive a blow job in public
spaces, unless it's like aschool or private property.
But if you're butt naked,fucking, yes, both of you are
going to get an indecentexposure.

Speaker 3 (53:25):
Yeah, but yeah, ok, so we did that, and then I had
told him I never been to likesixth street and so he took me
there and we had a drink rightbefore they closed, because it
was like a Tuesday night, so itclosed kind of early and this is
after the peer.
This is after the peer blow joband then he took me to some
neighborhood like within fiveminutes of sixth street and we

(53:46):
just parked and we were therefucking in his car until like
five or six am, like the sun wascoming up, and he still had to
take me back to my car at thearcade later, jeez, but it was
such a magical night.
I still talk to him on occasion.
I consider him like one of mycomment partners because like
he'll come around and then he'llgo away for a while and then

(54:08):
he'll come back.
Yeah, yeah.
I saw it on some poly groupbefore and I was like oh, that's
definitely this guyspecifically.

Speaker 1 (54:17):
Yeah, I got, I got one of those yeah.

Speaker 3 (54:18):
But yeah, so that's probably the craziest thing I've
done since being open teenager.
I did all kinds of shit.

Speaker 1 (54:24):
I mean we were.
You know, I was havingsleepovers with my neighbor and
blowing him with his parents andbrother like the room away.
So we've all been well and we,you know, I went to church camp.

Speaker 2 (54:36):
I've seen some.
I have such a boring childhoodcompared to the majority, vast
majority of the world.

Speaker 1 (54:45):
Hey you look, you ran the church whatever, I'm making
up for it now.

Speaker 2 (54:48):
I mean the church.

Speaker 1 (54:49):
There's exciting things in there.
Maybe not like sexy excitingbut no, not for me.

Speaker 2 (54:53):
Oh OK, that's true, Just just wildly.

Speaker 1 (54:57):
Awful.
I want to show the poem.

Speaker 3 (55:00):
I fought the church very well, I didn't not
necessarily fought, but Idisrespected the church hard
because, like I went through allof that Also, I was raised in
the church and I was forced togo to church.
But by the time I hit, like youknow, 12 or 13, I kind of
started to see truth.
Well, maybe not truth, but youknow what I mean.
Just I started seeing my own,my own path, and it had nothing

(55:20):
to do with the church.
So I but I was also adisrespectful teenager I ended
up having sex with one of mygirlfriends in the baptism pool
during a church lock in when wewere playing hide and seek.
That that was probably mybiggest like fuck this.

Speaker 1 (55:37):
Listen, I guess the first time anyone ever touched
my penis that was like not mewas at a church camp and like
people were playing treat thedare and I was a black guy
wearing white shorts, so like itwas just like a group of people
kept getting there to like taketheir hands in my pants at
church camp.
Like 20 minutes later we wereon our knees worshiping Jesus

(56:01):
Right.

Speaker 3 (56:01):
Thanks, church camp that sounds like church camp.

Speaker 1 (56:06):
Lockings are the exact same as sex parties.
It was like the first sex partyI went in.
I was like, oh, this is achurch lock in just without the
lies.

Speaker 3 (56:14):
I still haven't been to a sex party.

Speaker 1 (56:16):
Oh yeah, I can.
I know some, and one everymonth.

Speaker 3 (56:20):
Oh OK, I'm like not in a current like headspace for
that kind of thing at the moment, but definitely down the line.
I want to experience it just atleast once.
Like that was always one of mybiggest fantasies is like just a
room full of people all fuckingor not fucking and I'm getting
fucked.
Like whatever is going on, likeI just want a bunch of people
there.

Speaker 1 (56:41):
It's a great time.
I've been like five, six timesto this particular party.
I've only done anything withany other person one and a half
times.
The rest of the time they'rejust watching other people and
they're having a great time.
All right, we'll call it there,stephanie.
Any last final note questionthought.

Speaker 2 (56:56):
No, I'm taking it all in and I'm thinking maybe this
isn't my last life on Earth,because I've thought that for a
long time.
But I feel again like I'vemissed out on so much of my
teenhood, because it's cricketsfor my stories compared to all.
You're making up for last, I'mso jealous I am, I am.
I, it's true, listen, listen,that's true, but I just feel so

(57:22):
late.

Speaker 3 (57:22):
There's nothing wrong with being late to the game.
I was feeling that way when Ifirst started.
I was like man, I could havedone so much more.
But then you just got torealize that you're doing it now
and you're having a good timeand focus on that present.
That's right.
Forget that past.

Speaker 2 (57:36):
Yeah, that's right, that's right, that's right.

Speaker 1 (57:38):
My 30 year old brain doing wild sexy stuff is much
preferred.
Yeah, your 20 year old brain.

Speaker 2 (57:45):
Yeah, that's, that's true.
Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 3 (57:49):
So it's so not a great time.
I've hooked up with a couple ofpeople from my past and like I
just realized how this wasn'twhat it had to be.

Speaker 1 (57:59):
Yeah, now, trust me, one of these, one of the days
when we have a lot of time, I'lltell about my Craigless
encounters, and some of them arejust straight up stupid.
Just straight up.
I was trying to dive.

Speaker 2 (58:10):
Yeah, you're trying to get murdered, you're trying
to get murdered.

Speaker 1 (58:15):
Yeah, sure I'll get in your car and drive to a
location for by myself.
That 19 with no money in a deadphone, his basement looks safe.
Honestly, I do put the shit outof me.
It was awesome, but I shouldn'thave done it.
It's good, but yeah, now it's,you're not missing out.
It's like lots of them happen,but definitely 30 year old brain

(58:37):
is a maybe better time to behaving those experiences.

Speaker 3 (58:40):
Yeah, I'm excited to be.

Speaker 1 (58:43):
Well, it's a good time.
I highly recommend it.
Best, the fucking best.
You have anything else you wantto add there, if any socials
you want people to follow you onanything coming up you want.
You want cloud for.

Speaker 3 (58:53):
I mean I'm kind of still on hiatus at the moment,
but I do have a not safe forwork Twitter Been a minute.
I've been prepping myself to getback into it.
I kind of miss it, but I don'tmiss some aspects of it.
But I'm in a better headheadspace to deal with
everything.
I was just.
I was in a very dark place inmy last relationship and it kind
of caused me to just stopeverything.

(59:15):
I was isolating myself.
It was horrible time.
We do not stand.
But it's, it's my Twitter, it'sunderscore, it's just aura, a U
R A underscore.

Speaker 1 (59:25):
Gotcha, all right.
Yeah, well, throw those shownotes, you know, if you think
about it, you know want it there, we'll take it back out.
Yeah, for sure It'll be cool,all right.
Well, that'll wrap it up fortoday.
Thank you everybody forlistening.
We are currently working onswitching up our you know,
offline situation.
Please join the discord forupdates on that.
We're trying to figure out ifwe can do an only fans or a
co-fi.
Patreon is not very friendly tothe type of content that we do,

(59:49):
so we got to find a differentthing.
So we're working on that.
But join the discord.
Definitely this course.
In this discord, in the shownotes, talk about the episodes,
tell us what you think, askquestions.
We have a form that you canfill out at a little
renegadefilmscom slash.
Talk dirty to me and you cangive us confessions, requests to
be a guest, ask us to talkabout things.
We'll be happy to do it.
Season two has been goingwonderfully and glad that you're

(01:00:11):
joining us.
Thank you again or for comingin.
Please, if, as you make morestories, let us know We'll be.
We'll love to hear some more ofthem.

Speaker 3 (01:00:18):
Absolutely.
Thank you for having me.

Speaker 1 (01:00:20):
And let's all blow people on peers if we feel like
it.

Speaker 3 (01:00:26):
Highly recommend.
Especially with a city skyline,it was very nice.

Speaker 2 (01:00:31):
Make sure there's no cops around.

Speaker 3 (01:00:32):
I just wish there was a camera around, I'm sure it
looked beautiful.

Speaker 1 (01:00:36):
That can be arranged.

Speaker 3 (01:00:37):
Ayo.

Speaker 1 (01:00:39):
All right, bye, bye, bye.

Speaker 4 (01:00:42):
Talk Dirty to Me is a podcast by Little Renegade
Films.
It stars Sarah Marie Currie,casey, sammie Casey.
Why don't you sound real sexywhile you do it, do I?
No, why don't you?
Oh, why don't I?
Yeah, like you, remember howyou read your synopsis.

Speaker 2 (01:00:57):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:00:58):
You want me to do it like that?
Yes, okay, great.

Speaker 4 (01:01:01):
Okay, genius, okay, talk Dirty to.
Me is a podcast by LittleRenegade Films.
It stars Sarah Marie Currie,Casey Sammie, Tosin Alifaso and
Stephanie Spoon, With silentcontributions by Taylor Novak.
Title and closing themes byTosin Alifaso.

(01:01:22):
Follow us on the social mediasat Talk Dirty to Me pod, and for
more of our offerings go tolittlerenegadefilmscom.