March 6, 2024 • 37 mins
In this episode, TJ and Jaxin Jackson discuss the topic of believing in something bigger than yourself. Jaxin shares how his yoga and Buddhist practices have formed a foundation of belief and helped him stay grounded in his values. They explore the concept of taking responsibility for one's life and the power of realizing that the problem isn't bigger than oneself. Jackson also discusses the importance of challenges as opportunities for growth and how daily practice helps him stay present. They touch on moments of reflection and check-ins, as well as different perspectives on meditation and finding meditative moments in daily activities. In this conversation, Jaxin Jackson and TJ discuss various meditation practices, the importance of finding hope and believing in something bigger, and the process of testing and shifting beliefs. They also explore navigating difficult times and seeking happiness, discovering Buddhism and connection, and the sense of community and connection in Chicago. The conversation concludes with a discussion on alignment through storytelling, opening the heart through laughter, and expressing gratitude and happiness.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
TJ (00:15):
Hey friends, it's TJ, and you're listening to Tea with TJ,
where our love for tea,conversation and
self-improvement intersect, solet's take a deeper dive into my
cup and let's have a chat.
Hi friends, it's TJ, andwelcome back to another episode
(00:37):
of Tea with TJ.
And today I have a very specialguest with me Jackson Jackson,
hello.
So just for listeners, can youjust give a quick introduction
and a little bit of background?
Jaxin (00:56):
Absolutely so.
I'm Jackson Jackson.
I am an actor, I am a yogateacher, I am a comedian, a
storyteller and an all aroundgood time.
I'm a tourist.
Sun and moon, virgo Rising, soa lot of grounded earthy energy
(01:19):
over here.
TJ (01:21):
I think that's why we mesh so well together.
So when I was coming up withsome topics for episodes, one of
the topics was believing insomething bigger than yourself,
and when we originally talkedabout having you on the show,
maybe like two or three weeksago, this was the topic that you
(01:43):
chose and I also very muchthought that it would be highly
appropriate, especially withyour like, yoga background.
So just give me a quick thoughtor moment of like what does it
actually mean to you?
And like believing in somethingbigger than yourself.
Jaxin (02:02):
Okay, well, now you heard me say tourist, tourist, virgo,
nothing happens quickly, okay.
So I did start practicing yoga,first actually when I was 18.
So I started practicing yoga,like 22 years ago.
I was introduced through mycollege undergrad program.
(02:24):
I went to an acting programthat was our movement
requirement.
First year was to do yoga.
And before I'll go back, beforeeven getting to college, you
know, I didn't grow up in areally super religious family.
We were kind of like I say,like pseudo Christian.
You know, it's like we wereculturally Christian, like we
(02:45):
celebrated Christmas and likesometimes we go to church on
Easter, but you know, my motherwasn't really adamant about us
having any specific religiouspractices.
But when I was in high schoolI'm a curious person, I love
information, I've always beenthis way, right, I remember
taking a world religions classand learning about Hinduism and
(03:05):
learning about Buddhism andreally feeling like, oh, this is
this feels like something Ialready I actually already kind
of believe, and then just sortof, like you know, kept that
with me but never really didanything.
So when I got to college and Istarted practicing yoga, it was
like I came back, you know, tothese things that I had sort of
started to learn about as ayounger person and you know,
(03:26):
yoga is a practice that I thinkembodies a lot of the philosophy
involved in Hinduism andBuddhism.
No, I think it does, itembodies a lot of those
philosophies.
So yoga became a core practiceof mine to reflect, to center to
, you know, do some real likeself actualization, right, it
became part of my practice to dothose things and then, when I
(03:46):
got out of college, I startedpracticing Buddhism.
So I've been practicing yogafor 22 years, I've been
practicing as a teacher, I'veshown in Buddhist for 16 years
and I think together thosethings form a foundation of
belief, you know, and I shouldreally say like those are things
that I use to stay grounded inmy beliefs right, because my
(04:08):
beliefs are actually based on myown values, but these are
practices that have helped mestay angered and grounded in
those values, in those beliefs.
TJ (04:17):
But I'm curious to know, because it's something that has
piqued my interests Over thepast I would say seven or so
years in most of like thephilosophy and the thought
process behind it of we're allconnected and, like you know,
being present in the moment andkind of tied into the idea of a
(04:37):
yoga practice as well, whatwould you say has been like the
most valuable lesson that you'velearned.
Jaxin (04:45):
I think the most valuable lesson I've learned is that you
know it really, all it all doesmy reality is based on me,
right, like that I am the centerI actually is.
Everything I'm experiencing asa result of, like me, my own
life force, my own causes, myown perspective, right, that it
(05:06):
really is.
It all comes back to me and notin a self centered way, but
really, I think, actually liketaking ultimate responsibility
for my life, right, andunderstanding that like actually
it's all me, everything, all myrelationships, the situations
or circumstances I find myselfin and how I transform them.
Right.
So the power in that is knowingthat.
(05:27):
You know, as Lauren Hill said,I am the problem and the
solution, right, that that istrue, you know, and that one of
the other biggest lessons isthat the problem, the problem,
isn't bigger than me, right,because, because I'm part of it,
right, it's not, it can't bebigger than me, right?
So whatever the challenge orthe problem is, I'm also a part
(05:48):
of it, which means I cantransform it and I can change it
.
And I think oftentimes thedelusion is that the problem is
this external thing that wecan't control or we have no
influence over, and I thinkBuddhism actually tells you like
, yes, you do anything, youexperience anything that is in
(06:08):
your circumstance.
It's there because of youactually, and it's actually
there for you.
If it's a challenge or aproblem, is actually there for
you to be able to show yourBuddhahood right.
You're only encountering thatproblem as a result of having
practice, having developedyourself, and now you're meeting
this challenge so that you canactually get even stronger and
(06:29):
even more grounded in yourbeliefs and you can have the
actual proof of your practicebecause you've overcome this
challenge.
TJ (06:36):
I think it was Eckhart Tolle or Tick-Nock Han that
introduced me to this idea oflike ego versus like self and
how important it is when, likedealing with problems or a
certain situation, in that whenthat thought happened, or like
when I was introduced because Ibelieve I want to say I'd
(06:59):
originally heard of Tick-NockHan on the Super Soul Sunday
podcast, the like Oprah Winfreypodcast- that makes sense.
In that concept was sointeresting to me, and mainly
because growing up and I thinkI've told you this before I grew
up down south and very much wasa church kid and so I have all
of that spiritual baggage, so tospeak, behind me.
(07:23):
But as I've gotten older andkind of like been out in the
world, so to speak, I'verealized that, in kind of no pun
intended, but going back to thetopic, there is so much more
out in the world that's biggerthan me and it really has kind
of helped me solidify my placein the world, solidify myself as
an individual and where I fitin the whole cosmic scheme of
(07:47):
things.
What have you, do you know ofany of Tick-Nock, han or
Eckhart's like teachings?
Jaxin (07:57):
I do.
Eckhart is the four, the laws,the four I'm butchering the name
of this, but I believe thatthat do you know what I'm
talking about?
Only Tick-Nock Han, and so I'mlike, not not super specifically
, but I've heard of both ofthose people.
I I feel like I've.
I understand the generalphilosophy because it is based
(08:17):
in Buddhism, but I could notquote either one of them right
now, you know.
But yes, I definitely those aretwo very popular, you know
Buddhist philosophers and Idon't know if Eckhart actually
identifies as Buddhist, but itdefinitely his philosophy has
been.
TJ (08:33):
Yeah, I feel like a lot of people have read and resonated
with a lot of his writings soI'm curious why we kind of pivot
a little bit in this idea ofbelieving in something bigger
than yourself and with yourBuddhist background, has there
been like moments in your lifespecifically, or Situations
where you've had to call on thispractice?
(08:56):
Oh yeah, I had to kind of likehelp guide you through certain
situations, absolutely.
Jaxin (09:01):
I mean, I practice, it's a daily practice.
So, you know, the school ofBuddhism that I'm coming from is
a you know what they would calla lay practice, so it's in the
later date.
There are thousands ofdifferent schools of Buddhism,
so this is one of the much laterschools that came along and
there's no priesthood.
So it is very much like amodern, you know, buddhist
(09:24):
practice, but it is still adaily practice.
I say all that to say that,even though it is very modern
and it is very much, like youknow, accessible, it is still
that structure of it being adaily practice, or the idea of
like daily prayers, is stillvery much present.
You know, in Buddhism there isno guilt.
There is no you have to do X, yor Z.
But from folks who have beenpracticing and from the person
(09:45):
each and I shown himself whocreated this practice, he's like
, yeah, you should, you shouldprobably do this every day you
know, just to check, just so Ifeel like I use it daily To
again center and grab myself inthe things that I believe, my
values.
And Then, when it comes toactual like specific, like
(10:07):
challenges or issues, I Feellike studying is where a lot of
the support, because I practicedaily.
So you know, sometimes when youpractice something daily you
can fall into just like a habitof doing it and you kind of
check out, right, and that'sanother thing that practicing
daily actually helps you startto realize, right Is that you
(10:27):
know, just because you do itevery single day doesn't mean
that you're really Present in itevery single day.
And so, to keep myself present,I feel like studying as part of
what helps to keep me present.
So when I'm going throughsomething, I will definitely
talk to.
You know, there are elders thatI know that I've been
practicing for a very long time.
I'll ask them, like what shouldI read or what do you recommend
?
or you know, or I'll just youknow start opening up the
(10:50):
different.
There are so many differentteachings you know From nature
and Dachon and Buddhism, and somany people have also analyzed
his teachings too, so there's alot for you to open up and like
get into.
And I feel like when I'mchallenging something, it is
about like coming back to youknow Myself and being like how
can I further really like deepenmy faith through this challenge
(11:11):
, and so study is one of theways that I do that with the
idea, because you said somethingthat that pinged a thought for
me about how the daily practicecan Kind of become like an
autopilot type of thing and youkind of check out a little bit.
TJ (11:26):
How do you find ways to bring yourself back, or like
because the thought that I'mhaving is very much an acting
school Thought, where you know,when you're working through a
scene work, or if you're doing awarm-up and you Are meant to
come back to your body or likecome back to one, so to speak,
right, how, how do you find thespace and how do you find the
(11:51):
moments to be able to bringyourself back when you notice
that you're checking out orstarting to check out?
Jaxin (11:57):
Yeah, I mean always the breath, right, like if you're
focused on your breath thing,you're focused on the present
moment.
So that's definitely somethingthat, specifically, you know,
working with yoga, you knowtalking about these two, you
know things that are working inconcert in my life is the
embodied practice of yoga,pranayama, focusing on my breath
, because I know now, you know,blessed to know that if I focus
(12:20):
on my breath I am coming back tothe present moment.
I also have some exercises formy therapist that my therapist
over the years have like givenme.
So some of them are reallysimple, like you know, checking
with the senses and being likeyou know, I can hear the cars
outside, I can smell the teathat's brewing, I can see my
computer in front of me, I cantaste the breakfast I just had,
(12:42):
you know, but those are that'ssomething that you know.
It seems really silly sometimesin my mind when I do it, I'm
like this is so corny, but I'mlike it actually does work, you
know it does help bring me backto this moment, to just like
grab myself in my body, actually, and to use my senses, the ones
that I have available to me, tohelp do that, the breath, and
(13:02):
then I'm journaling, likedocumenting.
So I have a little book that Ikeep on my altar, that Each
month I have a I give myself atheme, you know, again,
something to help ground me, tohelp bring me back, and then,
under that, anything that popsup throughout the month.
That's like you know, this is aperson.
I'm really working through thisrelationship.
(13:23):
I'm really working through youknow the struggle.
You know I'm thinking aboutthis thing in the future,
whatever it is.
You know that I feel like Iwant to really be able to like
focus when I'm chanting right on.
I will write down in that bookas well, and then I'll go back,
you know, and I'll look backthrough it.
You know, throughout the yearor the years, like, I have one
book now that I just finishedthat, I think is the last two
years of my life.
(13:44):
So you know being able to goback to 2022, march 2022, and
see like, what did I write down?
What was I and where am I?
Where am I now?
Right again, hoping to bringmyself back into this moment,
and I think reminding myselfthat time has passed or time has
moved helps also to remind,remember like, oh yeah, I'm here
(14:05):
right now.
I was there.
I'm here, you know.
TJ (14:09):
I think that is probably one of the principles that I've
held on to the most in the pastfew years of being present.
And I find that there are a lotof moments and I will preface
this by saying that I am not I'ma very calm spirit.
I've always known that aboutmyself.
Literally everyone who has evermet me is like you're so warm,
(14:31):
you're so nice and like veryeven keeled.
But I find when I do getfrustrated or have moments of
anxiousness or feel like I amnot where I personally want to
be, these sensory things arevery, very helpful.
Like one of my favorite thingsto do in this city is to go for
(14:52):
a walk and it's a like late falland like early spring is a
really good time and it usuallyhelps kind of recenter me and
help me focus when I can smellthe trees, when I can feel the
sunlight on my face, when I canfeel the earth underneath my
feet, and it kind of helps kindof like bring me back.
(15:14):
I'm gonna just use it again,bring me back to one yes to just
really be present, because I dofeel like there are so many
times where you know colleaguesof my, friends of mine, we kind
of get wrapped up in this hustleand bustle, like this hustle
culture of life, and it's veryeasy to slip by and before you
(15:35):
know, it's been six months andyou don't know where you are
right, and so that that's alwayslike a thing that I try to be
very intentional about as I'mgoing through the year, because
I'm also curious to know yourthoughts on this.
But I feel like I have kind oflike benchmarks throughout the
year to like check in withmyself, so that things go a
(15:58):
little left, correct, I can kindof bring myself back.
Do you have moments like that?
Or like structure?
Jaxin (16:03):
Oh yeah, absolutely, and you know, practicing Buddhism
now and practicing with, likeNietzsche and other, nietzsche
national and Buddhist.
So I practice with SGI.
We have, like, we have holidays, right, so it's not.
I'm trying to think of, likehow to explain what a holiday is
like in SGI, because it's notreligious in the same way that,
like, christmas and Easter are.
(16:23):
They're more like anniversaries, you know, but there, but you
know, it helps to have thesemoments to like, stop and
reflect.
So one of them is, for example,when you join the practice,
right, that's a day that peoplecelebrate as like almost like a
birthday, right, because it'sthe idea, is it marks this
moment of you taking fullresponsibility for your life and
and and so like, that day,which mine is, march 16th, also
(16:47):
happens to be Youth Day in SGI'shistory, and that's a day where
the mentors, you know, endowthe future of this practice and
and really like humanity, right,they're like this is, it's
yours, right, they're just,that's what they're saying is
like, hey, this practice is hereto actually help us like, be
happy as humans and the missionis to share that right, practice
(17:09):
with people is to share, youknow, even the concept, the idea
with people and and it's it'sactually not us folks that are
aging, it's actually for you,you know so.
So that's always a point whereit's like I stop and I'm like,
yeah, you know this year to be16 years, it's like, okay, you
know that's a every year I checkin.
But but then also, as the yearsgo on, you know there are these
(17:33):
you know, like last year was 15years, five years before that
was 10 years, you know.
So I feel like, you know, Ifeel fortunate that I have that
built into sort of my practice.
And then I love New Year's.
I love the idea of like a Newbeginning.
So I love all of the New Yearcelebrations.
I like that they're simple, Ilike that everyone can celebrate
(17:54):
them.
So New Year's is always it'snot so much about resolutions,
but yeah, another time toreflect, you know, to stop and
just be like, you know, justturn the page it's new page,
refresh the page, you know.
You know, and Sometimes if I'mnot ready in January, I will
start my year in July, but youknow.
TJ (18:16):
So there's been a few years.
Jaxin (18:20):
Yeah, but yeah, definitely, sometimes it comes
to you too, I think, you know.
Sometimes you don't know thatyou're about to have a check-in
moment, but then maybe somethings fall apart, maybe some
things are not what you thoughtthey were about to be, and then
you're like, okay, this is amoment to stop and yeah,
checking, you know, didn't knowit was gonna happen.
(18:42):
It's not my birthday, but youknow.
TJ (18:48):
And speaking of the idea of like checking in with yourself,
do, because this is somethingthat I think I've picked up
recently in with your specificbackground, especially as a yoga
teacher.
I wanna know if you agree withme, because I have a certain
point of view when it comes tothis.
But meditation, I feel like alot of people think that
(19:11):
meditation has to be veryspecific in the sense of like
you have to sit, you have toclose your eyes, you have to.
You know this very, this socialpoint of view of what
meditation is.
But in my own life I've foundthat for me, meditation can be
(19:31):
making a cup of tea, makingdinner, going for a walk, like
whatever, that moment in timewhere I can be fully present
with my mind, body and my spirit.
Right, do you agree with thatstatement?
Slash what are okay.
How do you meditate?
(19:51):
Okay?
Jaxin (19:53):
so I don't disagree with anything that you said.
I do believe that words meanthings.
Also, meaning can be verysubjective, you know.
So I think for myself, theschools and the practices of
(20:17):
meditation are often aimed atthe mind, right.
They focus and they center themind, either connecting,
quieting, whatever it is butit's generally focused on this
idea of mindfulness, right, andso what I do as a Buddhist is
more of an active practice.
(20:37):
Actually, it's not so much aboutlike the mind, it's more about
activating yourself, and reallyit's like it focuses on the
heart, with what we refer to asthe heart, which is not just the
love center heart, right butlike the passion, the motivation
, the mission, right.
The heart symbolizes all ofthose things and it's about
(20:58):
really activating and pullingout your unlimited potential,
whereas motivation or meditationis, I think, something a little
bit different, and so I don'tactually feel qualified to tell
anyone else what meditation isor is not.
I just know that it's not whatI'm doing when I'm chanting, and
then, when I am doing it, itdoes feel like it is a practice
(21:19):
that is aimed at mindfulness,right, and whether that is
listening to an audio tape or,like you're saying, taking a
walk, I think it does come backto like your intention.
So I think if the intention isto be mindful, then I feel like
you could call it meditation.
Again, I'm not gonna tellanyone else what to call what
(21:40):
they do when they're doing it.
So if making a cup of tea asmeditation for you, then I feel
like it is right.
TJ (21:48):
And I will say let me give more context, because what I
have found over the years beingan avid tea lover, it allows me,
it forces me to slow down,right.
So, especially living in NewYork, there are just a million
things happening all at once,and so the act of making tea for
(22:09):
me, it forces me to stop andslow down and to be present in
what I'm actually doing.
Right, it's not passivelyhappening, like I can't put the
water together, go take a shower, like I have to be present with
that thing that I'm doing inthat moment.
Right, and even just thesteeping of the leaves takes
(22:31):
time, right.
So I'm allowing myself to bepresent in that moment with this
cup of tea, and then every sipthat happens after that, at
least for myself.
Maybe I'm a weirdo, I don'tknow, but for myself it's like
every sip is a different thoughtor a different moment for me,
(22:51):
where I'm starting to pick upthe nuances of the actual leaf,
right.
Wow, that's so poetic.
And so it's not thank you, it is, but it's not rushed right.
Right, because I feel likecoffee is a different experience
.
Right, like we, it's not thesame thing.
So for me, that's why Iconsider that like a meditative
(23:12):
moment for myself.
Jaxin (23:13):
Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, you know there's somecoffee drinkers out there ready
to fight you right now.
TJ (23:17):
They're like that is my morning meditation.
What?
Jaxin (23:22):
It keeps me calm.
But I think that we're sayingsimilar things, that in that,
you know the mindfulness, Ithink, and the intention is
really what it comes down to,because you could do all of
those things and not have it, bemindful and not take that time.
But your intention is to takethat time, to be mindful, and I
(23:42):
think that is what what I wouldsay makes it a meditation, you
know, is that you were puttingthe intention to be mindful of
what is happening.
I also wanted to just come back.
So the book I was thinkingabout was the Four Agreements,
and that is not Eckhart Tolle,that is Dami Gil Ruiz, another
philosopher.
Eckhart Tolle, I think, wrotethe Power Is Now, or the Power
(24:08):
Of Now, the Power Of Now, whichis the book of his that I am
familiar with.
Did not read the whole book,but definitely feel like I have
met some parts of it throughother people, but I do think,
again, mindfulness is reallyabout the intention.
So I agree that there is a needto have the distinction between
(24:30):
this idea of how you have to dothings right, like, versus
being able to claim somethingfor yourself, like if you're
like, you know what mymeditation is, making this cup
of tea, then I feel like that isvalid and that is real.
And if for someone else it isactually like sitting in a space
and crossing their legs and,you know, closing their eyes,
you know, then that is also.
That is also meditation,because the intention is there
(24:55):
and there's no right or wrongway, necessarily at least I
don't think to do it.
I just think that there aredifferent paths that everyone
takes to get there.
TJ (25:03):
I agree.
Was there a moment in time foryou where the quote unquote
switch happened, or where youshifted from maybe not
necessarily believing insomething bigger or kind of like
passively going through life?
But then you arrived at thisplace of like, oh or I'm gonna
(25:24):
use Oprah's words the aha moment, Uh-huh, where all of that kind
of like fell into place?
Jaxin (25:30):
There have been several of those moments Throughout my
life actually, because even onceyou, once you Think you know
what you believe, it has to betested right.
And so Daisaku Kada has a quoteI'm paraphrasing, but it's
something to the effect of youdon't actually know your beliefs
until there.
Everything falls apart, rightuntil someone actually
(25:50):
challenges them, right.
Um, but I think the the firstone that feels significant was
getting out of college.
So I got out of college in 2006, 700 years ago, but you know,
it was a hard.
It was a hard time, like I wentinto school right after 9, 11,
and Then 2006 is when, you know,the housing market started to
(26:15):
crash.
So by 2008 it was completely,you know, decimated.
But 2006 was like the beginning, the beginning of the that fall
, the Wall Street, all the WallStreet stuff happening and
People were just really unhappy.
I was unhappy.
Everyone just seemed reallysort of like you know, like it
felt like everything was reallyhard.
I remember, like now we talkabout her like wow, how did we
(26:38):
Survive as young people?
You know so many opportunitieslike iPhone was just, it was
brand, it had just started.
You know these app jobs, thatpeople, all these people getting
paid through apps like that was.
That was not.
That did not exist.
When I got out of college, youhad to make your money the good,
old-fashioned way, okay, with ajob that you had to go to most
(27:00):
of the time, you know, thisremote.
None of that, none, there wasno making.
We were not making money on theinternet really yet you know so
.
But then there were not thatmany jobs because the economy
was was tanking.
So we were all just likestruggling and I just remember
being like I don't want to beunhappy and Actually, you know,
(27:22):
what I believe is that happinessis not based in what I do or
don't have, because I see peoplewho, who don't have a Lot of
things and still manage to cracka smile, you know, still manage
to be hopeful.
And Right now, in this period oftime where I feel like I don't
have a lot of things and I'mlike hustling and trying to
figure out how to Just likesurvive as a young person, let
me also figure out how to, howto be happy, like what happiness
(27:45):
actually is like.
I want to really know what itis and I want to know what I
need to do To maintain it in myown life, and so that is when I
started to just like I just I'ma study year, you know, I love
information.
So I was going to like therewas a local place around the
corner from my house that didmeditation classes and I was
(28:06):
doing yoga at that point andthen I had a friend actually
that introduced me to Buddhism,who was on a similar journey Of
just being like, okay, thingsare really popping off right,
like how do we, how do we groundourselves?
And I remember thinking also,you know, I grew up in a home
with people who were addicts,who did not take the best care
of themselves, and we werereally unhappy.
(28:26):
And I remember thinking like Idon't want to grow old and be
unhappy like I don't want to be.
You know, this person who'sjust sort of like Grunted their
way through life, you know, butagain hasn't really figured out
how to be happy, and so thatreally sparked, you know, the
beginning of my journey andfinding Buddhism, specifically
(28:48):
because I knew what I valued.
I knew that I didn't believe inan external Power, because it
didn't make sense to me thatanything that could influence me
Would not also be something Icould influence right.
So you know, in Judeo-Christianphilosophy where there is a God
, or even in, you know, muslimright Islam, there is this idea
(29:08):
of Allah or of God being thisexternal figure.
But it never made sense to methat, that that figure could
affect me but I couldn't affectit, right?
That didn't make sense to me.
And then all of the otherthings with the church that have
come out over the years.
So I knew I wasn't, I wasn'treally interested in
(29:29):
Judeo-Christian type religions,but I was like, I feel like I
still that doesn't mean I don'twant something to still ground
me In what I do believe in,right, which is like I do
believe that we're connected.
I do believe that, you know, weare manifestations of this
universe, you know, whateverthose, you know, those ideas are
that are more broad.
I had a broad sense of beinglike we're connected, we're
(29:51):
connected, everything isconnected, we're all here
together.
So we all got to be connected,right.
And so then I think, throughPracticing Buddhism I was able
to start to articulate it.
You know a little bit betterfor myself, but that was that
moment of being, yeah, just like20, 21, think I was when I got
out of school, and just sort oflike struggling to find hope,
(30:13):
honestly, which is sointeresting because you know,
then, a few years later, barackObama and his audacity of hope,
you know, and it was true, itwas like I had I felt hopeless,
you know, and so you know thatit did resonate with me deeply
because it's like, oh yeah, thatis what I'm struggling with,
and Buddhism is a practice ofhope.
It is about giving people hope,you know.
(30:34):
It is about and not, you know,just giving it to people, but
actually, you know, givingIndividuals the tools so that
they can have hope.
Right it, the Buddhism, can'tgive you anything, but it can.
It can give you the tools to beable to manifest things for
yourself.
TJ (30:52):
No, that, that, just that tap muscle.
So it's interesting to hear youspeak On your journey in the in
that specific moment in time,because I I have gone through
(31:18):
Not a similar journey but aawakening, if you will probably,
post post high school, going tocollege, when I finally left
Memphis, left my immediatecommunity and went to Chicago
first, before moving to New York, and really started to see One
what the world really is,compared to what I was taught
(31:42):
and how I grew up, but then alsojust Finally opening myself up
to the world.
Jaxin (31:50):
And.
TJ (31:51):
And it just that taps me in a very specific way, because I
remember transitioning out ofhigh school, going to college,
and then even, ultimately, whenI moved to New York where I
started to kind of I mean Iwould the way I would describe
(32:14):
it is kind of like shift in tunewith the world, in the sense of
like understanding that there'smore than one way to believe.
Jaxin (32:25):
And Chicago is also a great place for that.
I mean, that's where I was too.
So I think you know, thinkingabout something bigger than
myself.
I feel like Chicago is a placethat really taught me a lot
about community as well, and soI started practicing yoga there,
I started practicing Buddhismthere, but then also, you know,
chicago is a place that has somany organizers and so many
people who aren't don't evenofficially have the label
(32:46):
organizer, but that is the roleand the part that they play in
the community.
You know, and you know thosepeople that are always
organizing the whatever localfunction or, you know, always
getting a group together, xyzare always just, like you know,
on the tech thread, being likeso and so me, such and such,
right, chicago is a place that Ireally really felt a sense of
(33:07):
community and really taught me alot about what it means to show
up and be connected and bepresent for that Because it
actually it's.
It's easy to be mean, likeselfish, and just be like, oh,
no, no, no, I'm going to just beover here, like worrying about
myself and focusing on myself,and Chicago is like nah, that's
not how we, it's not how we getdown over here.
You know we work together andwe know each other and you know
(33:29):
we're not going to overstepanybody's boundaries.
But if you're really actuallytrying to get some things done,
you're going to have to meetsome people.
You shake some hands, you kisssome babies.
TJ (33:39):
You know delivered.
Yeah, really get community.
That I was not expecting when Igot there.
Yeah, especially coming fromdown south, and in this idea of,
or this belief that I had thatthe north was not, you know,
nearly as friendly and open, inall of those things, chicago has
a very special place in myheart, because it it it taught
(34:01):
me a lot.
So thank you so much forjoining us on this episode, but
before we go, I have threequestions for you.
It's something that we like todo to just end the episode.
Where do you find yourself mostaligned?
Jaxin (34:16):
Where do I find myself most aligned?
I think it's, I wanted to say,performing, and, yes, on stage,
but not just the stage, stage,but teaching, speaking, right.
I feel like when I am likeusing my abilities as a
storyteller I guess that'sreally what it comes down to is
(34:39):
when I feel most aligned.
So, be that in a play, doingstand up or teaching a class,
you know, I think delivering astory and using all of my
abilities to help connect peopleto something right Because
that's essentially what that isright Is when I feel at most an
(35:00):
alignment.
TJ (35:01):
Nice what opens your heart the most?
Jaxin (35:07):
Laughter.
I love to laugh.
Yeah, making me laugh is like,yeah, I mean, it literally opens
my heart, you know.
And also, I think being able toshare a sense of humor with
someone is, you know, usuallysymbolic of a real deep
connection.
TJ (35:24):
So laughter is.
I mean, I know it's so cliche,but when people say laughter is
medicine, but it truly is.
It can change lives and mindsand hearts.
Jaxin (35:35):
My favorite thing is those moments when you're in
tears with your friends, youknow, when you're just laughing
so hard that you're crying andyour stomach hurts, like those
are the most beautiful momentsto me.
TJ (35:47):
Yeah.
And then final question whatwould you want your last words
to be?
Jaxin (35:53):
Thank you.
TJ (35:56):
Oh, that's beautiful.
That's beautiful.
Love that.
Oh my gosh, that's amazing yeah.
Jaxin (36:03):
I think happiness is the ultimate expression, or, I said,
gratitude is the ultimateexpression of happiness, and I
really want to be happy, I wantto die happy and I think, you
know, being filled withgratitude is when I feel the
happiest.
TJ (36:18):
So thank you so much for my pleasure.
Jaxin (36:21):
This is a wonderful, wonderful conversation.
TJ (36:24):
And on that note, friends, I'll see you next week and
that's our show.
Friends, thanks for joining uson a team with TJ.
Please rate, review andsubscribe, and you can find us
on Instagram at T with TJpodcast.
And, as always, stay kind, keepsipping and remember we're here
(36:46):
, so you might as well.
Hey friends, it's TJ, and you're listening to Tea with TJ,
where our love for tea,conversation and
self-improvement intersect, solet's take a deeper dive into my
cup and let's have a chat.
Hi friends, it's TJ, andwelcome back to another episode
(00:37):
of Tea with TJ.
And today I have a very specialguest with me Jackson Jackson,
hello.
So just for listeners, can youjust give a quick introduction
and a little bit of background?
Jaxin (00:56):
Absolutely so.
I'm Jackson Jackson.
I am an actor, I am a yogateacher, I am a comedian, a
storyteller and an all aroundgood time.
I'm a tourist.
Sun and moon, virgo Rising, soa lot of grounded earthy energy
(01:19):
over here.
TJ (01:21):
I think that's why we mesh so well together.
So when I was coming up withsome topics for episodes, one of
the topics was believing insomething bigger than yourself,
and when we originally talkedabout having you on the show,
maybe like two or three weeksago, this was the topic that you
(01:43):
chose and I also very muchthought that it would be highly
appropriate, especially withyour like, yoga background.
So just give me a quick thoughtor moment of like what does it
actually mean to you?
And like believing in somethingbigger than yourself.
Jaxin (02:02):
Okay, well, now you heard me say tourist, tourist, virgo,
nothing happens quickly, okay.
So I did start practicing yoga,first actually when I was 18.
So I started practicing yoga,like 22 years ago.
I was introduced through mycollege undergrad program.
(02:24):
I went to an acting programthat was our movement
requirement.
First year was to do yoga.
And before I'll go back, beforeeven getting to college, you
know, I didn't grow up in areally super religious family.
We were kind of like I say,like pseudo Christian.
You know, it's like we wereculturally Christian, like we
(02:45):
celebrated Christmas and likesometimes we go to church on
Easter, but you know, my motherwasn't really adamant about us
having any specific religiouspractices.
But when I was in high schoolI'm a curious person, I love
information, I've always beenthis way, right, I remember
taking a world religions classand learning about Hinduism and
(03:05):
learning about Buddhism andreally feeling like, oh, this is
this feels like something Ialready I actually already kind
of believe, and then just sortof, like you know, kept that
with me but never really didanything.
So when I got to college and Istarted practicing yoga, it was
like I came back, you know, tothese things that I had sort of
started to learn about as ayounger person and you know,
(03:26):
yoga is a practice that I thinkembodies a lot of the philosophy
involved in Hinduism andBuddhism.
No, I think it does, itembodies a lot of those
philosophies.
So yoga became a core practiceof mine to reflect, to center to
, you know, do some real likeself actualization, right, it
became part of my practice to dothose things and then, when I
(03:46):
got out of college, I startedpracticing Buddhism.
So I've been practicing yogafor 22 years, I've been
practicing as a teacher, I'veshown in Buddhist for 16 years
and I think together thosethings form a foundation of
belief, you know, and I shouldreally say like those are things
that I use to stay grounded inmy beliefs right, because my
(04:08):
beliefs are actually based on myown values, but these are
practices that have helped mestay angered and grounded in
those values, in those beliefs.
TJ (04:17):
But I'm curious to know, because it's something that has
piqued my interests Over thepast I would say seven or so
years in most of like thephilosophy and the thought
process behind it of we're allconnected and, like you know,
being present in the moment andkind of tied into the idea of a
(04:37):
yoga practice as well, whatwould you say has been like the
most valuable lesson that you'velearned.
Jaxin (04:45):
I think the most valuable lesson I've learned is that you
know it really, all it all doesmy reality is based on me,
right, like that I am the centerI actually is.
Everything I'm experiencing asa result of, like me, my own
life force, my own causes, myown perspective, right, that it
(05:06):
really is.
It all comes back to me and notin a self centered way, but
really, I think, actually liketaking ultimate responsibility
for my life, right, andunderstanding that like actually
it's all me, everything, all myrelationships, the situations
or circumstances I find myselfin and how I transform them.
Right.
So the power in that is knowingthat.
(05:27):
You know, as Lauren Hill said,I am the problem and the
solution, right, that that istrue, you know, and that one of
the other biggest lessons isthat the problem, the problem,
isn't bigger than me, right,because, because I'm part of it,
right, it's not, it can't bebigger than me, right?
So whatever the challenge orthe problem is, I'm also a part
(05:48):
of it, which means I cantransform it and I can change it
.
And I think oftentimes thedelusion is that the problem is
this external thing that wecan't control or we have no
influence over, and I thinkBuddhism actually tells you like
, yes, you do anything, youexperience anything that is in
(06:08):
your circumstance.
It's there because of youactually, and it's actually
there for you.
If it's a challenge or aproblem, is actually there for
you to be able to show yourBuddhahood right.
You're only encountering thatproblem as a result of having
practice, having developedyourself, and now you're meeting
this challenge so that you canactually get even stronger and
(06:29):
even more grounded in yourbeliefs and you can have the
actual proof of your practicebecause you've overcome this
challenge.
TJ (06:36):
I think it was Eckhart Tolle or Tick-Nock Han that
introduced me to this idea oflike ego versus like self and
how important it is when, likedealing with problems or a
certain situation, in that whenthat thought happened, or like
when I was introduced because Ibelieve I want to say I'd
(06:59):
originally heard of Tick-NockHan on the Super Soul Sunday
podcast, the like Oprah Winfreypodcast- that makes sense.
In that concept was sointeresting to me, and mainly
because growing up and I thinkI've told you this before I grew
up down south and very much wasa church kid and so I have all
of that spiritual baggage, so tospeak, behind me.
(07:23):
But as I've gotten older andkind of like been out in the
world, so to speak, I'verealized that, in kind of no pun
intended, but going back to thetopic, there is so much more
out in the world that's biggerthan me and it really has kind
of helped me solidify my placein the world, solidify myself as
an individual and where I fitin the whole cosmic scheme of
(07:47):
things.
What have you, do you know ofany of Tick-Nock, han or
Eckhart's like teachings?
Jaxin (07:57):
I do.
Eckhart is the four, the laws,the four I'm butchering the name
of this, but I believe thatthat do you know what I'm
talking about?
Only Tick-Nock Han, and so I'mlike, not not super specifically
, but I've heard of both ofthose people.
I I feel like I've.
I understand the generalphilosophy because it is based
(08:17):
in Buddhism, but I could notquote either one of them right
now, you know.
But yes, I definitely those aretwo very popular, you know
Buddhist philosophers and Idon't know if Eckhart actually
identifies as Buddhist, but itdefinitely his philosophy has
been.
TJ (08:33):
Yeah, I feel like a lot of people have read and resonated
with a lot of his writings soI'm curious why we kind of pivot
a little bit in this idea ofbelieving in something bigger
than yourself and with yourBuddhist background, has there
been like moments in your lifespecifically, or Situations
where you've had to call on thispractice?
(08:56):
Oh yeah, I had to kind of likehelp guide you through certain
situations, absolutely.
Jaxin (09:01):
I mean, I practice, it's a daily practice.
So, you know, the school ofBuddhism that I'm coming from is
a you know what they would calla lay practice, so it's in the
later date.
There are thousands ofdifferent schools of Buddhism,
so this is one of the much laterschools that came along and
there's no priesthood.
So it is very much like amodern, you know, buddhist
(09:24):
practice, but it is still adaily practice.
I say all that to say that,even though it is very modern
and it is very much, like youknow, accessible, it is still
that structure of it being adaily practice, or the idea of
like daily prayers, is stillvery much present.
You know, in Buddhism there isno guilt.
There is no you have to do X, yor Z.
But from folks who have beenpracticing and from the person
(09:45):
each and I shown himself whocreated this practice, he's like
, yeah, you should, you shouldprobably do this every day you
know, just to check, just so Ifeel like I use it daily To
again center and grab myself inthe things that I believe, my
values.
And Then, when it comes toactual like specific, like
(10:07):
challenges or issues, I Feellike studying is where a lot of
the support, because I practicedaily.
So you know, sometimes when youpractice something daily you
can fall into just like a habitof doing it and you kind of
check out, right, and that'sanother thing that practicing
daily actually helps you startto realize, right Is that you
(10:27):
know, just because you do itevery single day doesn't mean
that you're really Present in itevery single day.
And so, to keep myself present,I feel like studying as part of
what helps to keep me present.
So when I'm going throughsomething, I will definitely
talk to.
You know, there are elders thatI know that I've been
practicing for a very long time.
I'll ask them, like what shouldI read or what do you recommend
?
or you know, or I'll just youknow start opening up the
(10:50):
different.
There are so many differentteachings you know From nature
and Dachon and Buddhism, and somany people have also analyzed
his teachings too, so there's alot for you to open up and like
get into.
And I feel like when I'mchallenging something, it is
about like coming back to youknow Myself and being like how
can I further really like deepenmy faith through this challenge
(11:11):
, and so study is one of theways that I do that with the
idea, because you said somethingthat that pinged a thought for
me about how the daily practicecan Kind of become like an
autopilot type of thing and youkind of check out a little bit.
TJ (11:26):
How do you find ways to bring yourself back, or like
because the thought that I'mhaving is very much an acting
school Thought, where you know,when you're working through a
scene work, or if you're doing awarm-up and you Are meant to
come back to your body or likecome back to one, so to speak,
right, how, how do you find thespace and how do you find the
(11:51):
moments to be able to bringyourself back when you notice
that you're checking out orstarting to check out?
Jaxin (11:57):
Yeah, I mean always the breath, right, like if you're
focused on your breath thing,you're focused on the present
moment.
So that's definitely somethingthat, specifically, you know,
working with yoga, you knowtalking about these two, you
know things that are working inconcert in my life is the
embodied practice of yoga,pranayama, focusing on my breath
, because I know now, you know,blessed to know that if I focus
(12:20):
on my breath I am coming back tothe present moment.
I also have some exercises formy therapist that my therapist
over the years have like givenme.
So some of them are reallysimple, like you know, checking
with the senses and being likeyou know, I can hear the cars
outside, I can smell the teathat's brewing, I can see my
computer in front of me, I cantaste the breakfast I just had,
(12:42):
you know, but those are that'ssomething that you know.
It seems really silly sometimesin my mind when I do it, I'm
like this is so corny, but I'mlike it actually does work, you
know it does help bring me backto this moment, to just like
grab myself in my body, actually, and to use my senses, the ones
that I have available to me, tohelp do that, the breath, and
(13:02):
then I'm journaling, likedocumenting.
So I have a little book that Ikeep on my altar, that Each
month I have a I give myself atheme, you know, again,
something to help ground me, tohelp bring me back, and then,
under that, anything that popsup throughout the month.
That's like you know, this is aperson.
I'm really working through thisrelationship.
(13:23):
I'm really working through youknow the struggle.
You know I'm thinking aboutthis thing in the future,
whatever it is.
You know that I feel like Iwant to really be able to like
focus when I'm chanting right on.
I will write down in that bookas well, and then I'll go back,
you know, and I'll look backthrough it.
You know, throughout the yearor the years, like, I have one
book now that I just finishedthat, I think is the last two
years of my life.
(13:44):
So you know being able to goback to 2022, march 2022, and
see like, what did I write down?
What was I and where am I?
Where am I now?
Right again, hoping to bringmyself back into this moment,
and I think reminding myselfthat time has passed or time has
moved helps also to remind,remember like, oh yeah, I'm here
(14:05):
right now.
I was there.
I'm here, you know.
TJ (14:09):
I think that is probably one of the principles that I've
held on to the most in the pastfew years of being present.
And I find that there are a lotof moments and I will preface
this by saying that I am not I'ma very calm spirit.
I've always known that aboutmyself.
Literally everyone who has evermet me is like you're so warm,
(14:31):
you're so nice and like veryeven keeled.
But I find when I do getfrustrated or have moments of
anxiousness or feel like I amnot where I personally want to
be, these sensory things arevery, very helpful.
Like one of my favorite thingsto do in this city is to go for
(14:52):
a walk and it's a like late falland like early spring is a
really good time and it usuallyhelps kind of recenter me and
help me focus when I can smellthe trees, when I can feel the
sunlight on my face, when I canfeel the earth underneath my
feet, and it kind of helps kindof like bring me back.
(15:14):
I'm gonna just use it again,bring me back to one yes to just
really be present, because I dofeel like there are so many
times where you know colleaguesof my, friends of mine, we kind
of get wrapped up in this hustleand bustle, like this hustle
culture of life, and it's veryeasy to slip by and before you
(15:35):
know, it's been six months andyou don't know where you are
right, and so that that's alwayslike a thing that I try to be
very intentional about as I'mgoing through the year, because
I'm also curious to know yourthoughts on this.
But I feel like I have kind oflike benchmarks throughout the
year to like check in withmyself, so that things go a
(15:58):
little left, correct, I can kindof bring myself back.
Do you have moments like that?
Or like structure?
Jaxin (16:03):
Oh yeah, absolutely, and you know, practicing Buddhism
now and practicing with, likeNietzsche and other, nietzsche
national and Buddhist.
So I practice with SGI.
We have, like, we have holidays, right, so it's not.
I'm trying to think of, likehow to explain what a holiday is
like in SGI, because it's notreligious in the same way that,
like, christmas and Easter are.
(16:23):
They're more like anniversaries, you know, but there, but you
know, it helps to have thesemoments to like, stop and
reflect.
So one of them is, for example,when you join the practice,
right, that's a day that peoplecelebrate as like almost like a
birthday, right, because it'sthe idea, is it marks this
moment of you taking fullresponsibility for your life and
and and so like, that day,which mine is, march 16th, also
(16:47):
happens to be Youth Day in SGI'shistory, and that's a day where
the mentors, you know, endowthe future of this practice and
and really like humanity, right,they're like this is, it's
yours, right, they're just,that's what they're saying is
like, hey, this practice is hereto actually help us like, be
happy as humans and the missionis to share that right, practice
(17:09):
with people is to share, youknow, even the concept, the idea
with people and and it's it'sactually not us folks that are
aging, it's actually for you,you know so.
So that's always a point whereit's like I stop and I'm like,
yeah, you know this year to be16 years, it's like, okay, you
know that's a every year I checkin.
But but then also, as the yearsgo on, you know there are these
(17:33):
you know, like last year was 15years, five years before that
was 10 years, you know.
So I feel like, you know, Ifeel fortunate that I have that
built into sort of my practice.
And then I love New Year's.
I love the idea of like a Newbeginning.
So I love all of the New Yearcelebrations.
I like that they're simple, Ilike that everyone can celebrate
(17:54):
them.
So New Year's is always it'snot so much about resolutions,
but yeah, another time toreflect, you know, to stop and
just be like, you know, justturn the page it's new page,
refresh the page, you know.
You know, and Sometimes if I'mnot ready in January, I will
start my year in July, but youknow.
TJ (18:16):
So there's been a few years.
Jaxin (18:20):
Yeah, but yeah, definitely, sometimes it comes
to you too, I think, you know.
Sometimes you don't know thatyou're about to have a check-in
moment, but then maybe somethings fall apart, maybe some
things are not what you thoughtthey were about to be, and then
you're like, okay, this is amoment to stop and yeah,
checking, you know, didn't knowit was gonna happen.
(18:42):
It's not my birthday, but youknow.
TJ (18:48):
And speaking of the idea of like checking in with yourself,
do, because this is somethingthat I think I've picked up
recently in with your specificbackground, especially as a yoga
teacher.
I wanna know if you agree withme, because I have a certain
point of view when it comes tothis.
But meditation, I feel like alot of people think that
(19:11):
meditation has to be veryspecific in the sense of like
you have to sit, you have toclose your eyes, you have to.
You know this very, this socialpoint of view of what
meditation is.
But in my own life I've foundthat for me, meditation can be
(19:31):
making a cup of tea, makingdinner, going for a walk, like
whatever, that moment in timewhere I can be fully present
with my mind, body and my spirit.
Right, do you agree with thatstatement?
Slash what are okay.
How do you meditate?
(19:51):
Okay?
Jaxin (19:53):
so I don't disagree with anything that you said.
I do believe that words meanthings.
Also, meaning can be verysubjective, you know.
So I think for myself, theschools and the practices of
(20:17):
meditation are often aimed atthe mind, right.
They focus and they center themind, either connecting,
quieting, whatever it is butit's generally focused on this
idea of mindfulness, right, andso what I do as a Buddhist is
more of an active practice.
(20:37):
Actually, it's not so much aboutlike the mind, it's more about
activating yourself, and reallyit's like it focuses on the
heart, with what we refer to asthe heart, which is not just the
love center heart, right butlike the passion, the motivation
, the mission, right.
The heart symbolizes all ofthose things and it's about
(20:58):
really activating and pullingout your unlimited potential,
whereas motivation or meditationis, I think, something a little
bit different, and so I don'tactually feel qualified to tell
anyone else what meditation isor is not.
I just know that it's not whatI'm doing when I'm chanting, and
then, when I am doing it, itdoes feel like it is a practice
(21:19):
that is aimed at mindfulness,right, and whether that is
listening to an audio tape or,like you're saying, taking a
walk, I think it does come backto like your intention.
So I think if the intention isto be mindful, then I feel like
you could call it meditation.
Again, I'm not gonna tellanyone else what to call what
(21:40):
they do when they're doing it.
So if making a cup of tea asmeditation for you, then I feel
like it is right.
TJ (21:48):
And I will say let me give more context, because what I
have found over the years beingan avid tea lover, it allows me,
it forces me to slow down,right.
So, especially living in NewYork, there are just a million
things happening all at once,and so the act of making tea for
(22:09):
me, it forces me to stop andslow down and to be present in
what I'm actually doing.
Right, it's not passivelyhappening, like I can't put the
water together, go take a shower, like I have to be present with
that thing that I'm doing inthat moment.
Right, and even just thesteeping of the leaves takes
(22:31):
time, right.
So I'm allowing myself to bepresent in that moment with this
cup of tea, and then every sipthat happens after that, at
least for myself.
Maybe I'm a weirdo, I don'tknow, but for myself it's like
every sip is a different thoughtor a different moment for me,
(22:51):
where I'm starting to pick upthe nuances of the actual leaf,
right.
Wow, that's so poetic.
And so it's not thank you, it is, but it's not rushed right.
Right, because I feel likecoffee is a different experience
.
Right, like we, it's not thesame thing.
So for me, that's why Iconsider that like a meditative
(23:12):
moment for myself.
Jaxin (23:13):
Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, you know there's somecoffee drinkers out there ready
to fight you right now.
TJ (23:17):
They're like that is my morning meditation.
What?
Jaxin (23:22):
It keeps me calm.
But I think that we're sayingsimilar things, that in that,
you know the mindfulness, Ithink, and the intention is
really what it comes down to,because you could do all of
those things and not have it, bemindful and not take that time.
But your intention is to takethat time, to be mindful, and I
(23:42):
think that is what what I wouldsay makes it a meditation, you
know, is that you were puttingthe intention to be mindful of
what is happening.
I also wanted to just come back.
So the book I was thinkingabout was the Four Agreements,
and that is not Eckhart Tolle,that is Dami Gil Ruiz, another
philosopher.
Eckhart Tolle, I think, wrotethe Power Is Now, or the Power
(24:08):
Of Now, the Power Of Now, whichis the book of his that I am
familiar with.
Did not read the whole book,but definitely feel like I have
met some parts of it throughother people, but I do think,
again, mindfulness is reallyabout the intention.
So I agree that there is a needto have the distinction between
(24:30):
this idea of how you have to dothings right, like, versus
being able to claim somethingfor yourself, like if you're
like, you know what mymeditation is, making this cup
of tea, then I feel like that isvalid and that is real.
And if for someone else it isactually like sitting in a space
and crossing their legs and,you know, closing their eyes,
you know, then that is also.
That is also meditation,because the intention is there
(24:55):
and there's no right or wrongway, necessarily at least I
don't think to do it.
I just think that there aredifferent paths that everyone
takes to get there.
TJ (25:03):
I agree.
Was there a moment in time foryou where the quote unquote
switch happened, or where youshifted from maybe not
necessarily believing insomething bigger or kind of like
passively going through life?
But then you arrived at thisplace of like, oh or I'm gonna
(25:24):
use Oprah's words the aha moment, Uh-huh, where all of that kind
of like fell into place?
Jaxin (25:30):
There have been several of those moments Throughout my
life actually, because even onceyou, once you Think you know
what you believe, it has to betested right.
And so Daisaku Kada has a quoteI'm paraphrasing, but it's
something to the effect of youdon't actually know your beliefs
until there.
Everything falls apart, rightuntil someone actually
(25:50):
challenges them, right.
Um, but I think the the firstone that feels significant was
getting out of college.
So I got out of college in 2006, 700 years ago, but you know,
it was a hard.
It was a hard time, like I wentinto school right after 9, 11,
and Then 2006 is when, you know,the housing market started to
(26:15):
crash.
So by 2008 it was completely,you know, decimated.
But 2006 was like the beginning, the beginning of the that fall
, the Wall Street, all the WallStreet stuff happening and
People were just really unhappy.
I was unhappy.
Everyone just seemed reallysort of like you know, like it
felt like everything was reallyhard.
I remember, like now we talkabout her like wow, how did we
(26:38):
Survive as young people?
You know so many opportunitieslike iPhone was just, it was
brand, it had just started.
You know these app jobs, thatpeople, all these people getting
paid through apps like that was.
That was not.
That did not exist.
When I got out of college, youhad to make your money the good,
old-fashioned way, okay, with ajob that you had to go to most
(27:00):
of the time, you know, thisremote.
None of that, none, there wasno making.
We were not making money on theinternet really yet you know so
.
But then there were not thatmany jobs because the economy
was was tanking.
So we were all just likestruggling and I just remember
being like I don't want to beunhappy and Actually, you know,
(27:22):
what I believe is that happinessis not based in what I do or
don't have, because I see peoplewho, who don't have a Lot of
things and still manage to cracka smile, you know, still manage
to be hopeful.
And Right now, in this period oftime where I feel like I don't
have a lot of things and I'mlike hustling and trying to
figure out how to Just likesurvive as a young person, let
me also figure out how to, howto be happy, like what happiness
(27:45):
actually is like.
I want to really know what itis and I want to know what I
need to do To maintain it in myown life, and so that is when I
started to just like I just I'ma study year, you know, I love
information.
So I was going to like therewas a local place around the
corner from my house that didmeditation classes and I was
(28:06):
doing yoga at that point andthen I had a friend actually
that introduced me to Buddhism,who was on a similar journey Of
just being like, okay, thingsare really popping off right,
like how do we, how do we groundourselves?
And I remember thinking also,you know, I grew up in a home
with people who were addicts,who did not take the best care
of themselves, and we werereally unhappy.
(28:26):
And I remember thinking like Idon't want to grow old and be
unhappy like I don't want to be.
You know, this person who'sjust sort of like Grunted their
way through life, you know, butagain hasn't really figured out
how to be happy, and so thatreally sparked, you know, the
beginning of my journey andfinding Buddhism, specifically
(28:48):
because I knew what I valued.
I knew that I didn't believe inan external Power, because it
didn't make sense to me thatanything that could influence me
Would not also be something Icould influence right.
So you know, in Judeo-Christianphilosophy where there is a God
, or even in, you know, muslimright Islam, there is this idea
(29:08):
of Allah or of God being thisexternal figure.
But it never made sense to methat, that that figure could
affect me but I couldn't affectit, right?
That didn't make sense to me.
And then all of the otherthings with the church that have
come out over the years.
So I knew I wasn't, I wasn'treally interested in
(29:29):
Judeo-Christian type religions,but I was like, I feel like I
still that doesn't mean I don'twant something to still ground
me In what I do believe in,right, which is like I do
believe that we're connected.
I do believe that, you know, weare manifestations of this
universe, you know, whateverthose, you know, those ideas are
that are more broad.
I had a broad sense of beinglike we're connected, we're
(29:51):
connected, everything isconnected, we're all here
together.
So we all got to be connected,right.
And so then I think, throughPracticing Buddhism I was able
to start to articulate it.
You know a little bit betterfor myself, but that was that
moment of being, yeah, just like20, 21, think I was when I got
out of school, and just sort oflike struggling to find hope,
(30:13):
honestly, which is sointeresting because you know,
then, a few years later, barackObama and his audacity of hope,
you know, and it was true, itwas like I had I felt hopeless,
you know, and so you know thatit did resonate with me deeply
because it's like, oh yeah, thatis what I'm struggling with,
and Buddhism is a practice ofhope.
It is about giving people hope,you know.
(30:34):
It is about and not, you know,just giving it to people, but
actually, you know, givingIndividuals the tools so that
they can have hope.
Right it, the Buddhism, can'tgive you anything, but it can.
It can give you the tools to beable to manifest things for
yourself.
TJ (30:52):
No, that, that, just that tap muscle.
So it's interesting to hear youspeak On your journey in the in
that specific moment in time,because I I have gone through
(31:18):
Not a similar journey but aawakening, if you will probably,
post post high school, going tocollege, when I finally left
Memphis, left my immediatecommunity and went to Chicago
first, before moving to New York, and really started to see One
what the world really is,compared to what I was taught
(31:42):
and how I grew up, but then alsojust Finally opening myself up
to the world.
Jaxin (31:50):
And.
TJ (31:51):
And it just that taps me in a very specific way, because I
remember transitioning out ofhigh school, going to college,
and then even, ultimately, whenI moved to New York where I
started to kind of I mean Iwould the way I would describe
(32:14):
it is kind of like shift in tunewith the world, in the sense of
like understanding that there'smore than one way to believe.
Jaxin (32:25):
And Chicago is also a great place for that.
I mean, that's where I was too.
So I think you know, thinkingabout something bigger than
myself.
I feel like Chicago is a placethat really taught me a lot
about community as well, and soI started practicing yoga there,
I started practicing Buddhismthere, but then also, you know,
chicago is a place that has somany organizers and so many
people who aren't don't evenofficially have the label
(32:46):
organizer, but that is the roleand the part that they play in
the community.
You know, and you know thosepeople that are always
organizing the whatever localfunction or, you know, always
getting a group together, xyzare always just, like you know,
on the tech thread, being likeso and so me, such and such,
right, chicago is a place that Ireally really felt a sense of
(33:07):
community and really taught me alot about what it means to show
up and be connected and bepresent for that Because it
actually it's.
It's easy to be mean, likeselfish, and just be like, oh,
no, no, no, I'm going to just beover here, like worrying about
myself and focusing on myself,and Chicago is like nah, that's
not how we, it's not how we getdown over here.
You know we work together andwe know each other and you know
(33:29):
we're not going to overstepanybody's boundaries.
But if you're really actuallytrying to get some things done,
you're going to have to meetsome people.
You shake some hands, you kisssome babies.
TJ (33:39):
You know delivered.
Yeah, really get community.
That I was not expecting when Igot there.
Yeah, especially coming fromdown south, and in this idea of,
or this belief that I had thatthe north was not, you know,
nearly as friendly and open, inall of those things, chicago has
a very special place in myheart, because it it it taught
(34:01):
me a lot.
So thank you so much forjoining us on this episode, but
before we go, I have threequestions for you.
It's something that we like todo to just end the episode.
Where do you find yourself mostaligned?
Jaxin (34:16):
Where do I find myself most aligned?
I think it's, I wanted to say,performing, and, yes, on stage,
but not just the stage, stage,but teaching, speaking, right.
I feel like when I am likeusing my abilities as a
storyteller I guess that'sreally what it comes down to is
(34:39):
when I feel most aligned.
So, be that in a play, doingstand up or teaching a class,
you know, I think delivering astory and using all of my
abilities to help connect peopleto something right Because
that's essentially what that isright Is when I feel at most an
(35:00):
alignment.
TJ (35:01):
Nice what opens your heart the most?
Jaxin (35:07):
Laughter.
I love to laugh.
Yeah, making me laugh is like,yeah, I mean, it literally opens
my heart, you know.
And also, I think being able toshare a sense of humor with
someone is, you know, usuallysymbolic of a real deep
connection.
TJ (35:24):
So laughter is.
I mean, I know it's so cliche,but when people say laughter is
medicine, but it truly is.
It can change lives and mindsand hearts.
Jaxin (35:35):
My favorite thing is those moments when you're in
tears with your friends, youknow, when you're just laughing
so hard that you're crying andyour stomach hurts, like those
are the most beautiful momentsto me.
TJ (35:47):
Yeah.
And then final question whatwould you want your last words
to be?
Jaxin (35:53):
Thank you.
TJ (35:56):
Oh, that's beautiful.
That's beautiful.
Love that.
Oh my gosh, that's amazing yeah.
Jaxin (36:03):
I think happiness is the ultimate expression, or, I said,
gratitude is the ultimateexpression of happiness, and I
really want to be happy, I wantto die happy and I think, you
know, being filled withgratitude is when I feel the
happiest.
TJ (36:18):
So thank you so much for my pleasure.
Jaxin (36:21):
This is a wonderful, wonderful conversation.
TJ (36:24):
And on that note, friends, I'll see you next week and
that's our show.
Friends, thanks for joining uson a team with TJ.
Please rate, review andsubscribe, and you can find us
on Instagram at T with TJpodcast.
And, as always, stay kind, keepsipping and remember we're here
(36:46):
, so you might as well.
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