April 3, 2024 • 32 mins
Have you ever felt the tug-of-war between who you are and who society expects you to be? Today, I had the pleasure of sipping tea with Chethan, a dazzling beacon of individuality from the bustling streets of New York. As an actor, drag queen, singer, and dancer, he peels back the curtain on his transformational journey, one that has seen him merge the masculine and feminine into a harmonious existence. Through his story, we unravel the threads of self-love and the sheer bravery it takes to defy the cookie-cutter norms, finding acceptance and growth in the most unexpected places.
This episode is a celebration of the colorful tapestry that is Chethan's life – from the cultural significance of his drag performances, adorned in the transformative elegance of a sari, to the practical wisdom he shares for budding drag artists seeking to carve out their own identity. Chethan's anecdotes provide a roadmap for embracing passion and self-representation, underscoring the importance of perseverance in the face of agency pigeonholing and the quest for true self-love. So, pull up a chair, and let's toast to the art of being unapologetically oneself, an inspiring journey that Chethan navigates with grace and flair.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
TJ (00:15):
Hey friends, it's TJ, and you're listening to Tea with TJ,
where our love for tea,conversation and
self-improvement intersect.
So let's take a deeper diveinto my cup and let's have a
chat.
Hey friends, it's TJ.
Welcome back to another episodeof Tea with TJ, and today we're
(00:40):
having some mystic mint tea,and I have a very special guest
for you.
Please introduce yourself.
Chethan (00:46):
Hi everyone, I'm Chathan.
TJ (00:50):
That's love it and give us a little, a little bit of
background about yourself.
Chethan (00:55):
I live here in New York City.
I'm an actor, drag queen,singer, dancer, kind of gamut of
all kinds of performing Love it, love it.
I've been here almost 15 years.
Did a list in LA.
Came back because New York isNew York or nowhere.
TJ (01:12):
Yeah, same.
Chethan (01:13):
She's my girl.
Yeah, she's my girl.
TJ (01:15):
So we met just for a little bit of background, for the folks
watching and listening.
We met while you were doing ashow a immersive theater
production, to say the least.
And you were doing a show animmersive theater production, to
say the least and you weresitting next to me and for I
would say, like the first 20minutes, I did not know that you
were a part of the show.
Oh my God, good yeah.
Chethan (01:35):
So you were doing your job, okay great, because I
wasn't sure, because you know,we were interacting and asking
about, like the guy that waswaiting for, and so I was like,
okay, do they know, do they notknow?
But this is good, Good to know.
Yeah, I mean it was.
TJ (01:47):
It was really, really good.
So, with all of that, we metafter the show was over and I
had a chance to like get to knowyou a little bit and introduce
myself and asked you to come onthe show.
So I'm so excited.
Chethan (02:01):
Me too.
TJ (02:13):
My first podcast, yeah, so when I gave you the topic
discussions, you chose owningyour individuality, which is so
amazing, and I love it becauseno one ever chooses that topic.
Yeah, so I'm curious to knowwhat like jumped out to you with
that topic.
Chethan (02:25):
I think that's jumped to me because that's kind of
been my journey recently, Ithink the last couple of years,
like starting 2021, kind of likecoming out of the pandemic I
just moved back to New York fromLA early 2020, like two or
three weeks before the lockdownstarted.
So coming out of that being awayfrom the city with family for
(02:46):
seven, eight months, then comingto the city and everything was
different I really had to likesit with myself and you know,
I'm 37 now but 33, 34 then, andit was a big shift of like who
am I and how do I want to be inthis world?
And like, for me, my drag in myreal life was very separate.
(03:10):
I made a very conscious effortto keep like the feminine away
from the masculine type of thingjust based on like the industry
.
And you know, until recently,like drag queens weren't as the
thing that they are now becauseof drag race.
Like my agent said, you know,you should really not do drag,
all that kind of stuff.
So I really kept it beingseparate.
(03:31):
But things started to kind ofshift and that was my like last
two, two years, three years oflike really coming into my own.
TJ (03:43):
So with with that kind of being the catalyst for that
mindset shift um what has beenlike the biggest lesson you've
learned and being able to likeown your individuality in that
way, people are more acceptingthan they think okay, which is
surprising.
Chethan (04:00):
Yeah, like I was really worried about, you know,
kind of mixing the masculine andfeminine in my daily life.
I always have a great intofashion, but really kind of
pushing my fashion choices, likesometimes wearing a little
black leather mini skirt with atank top and boots, or kind of
exploring that mixing ofquote-unquote feminine fashion
(04:23):
with my daily life.
I thought it was going to be alot more like hit with kind of
negativity and it wasn't, andthat kind of like made me come
out of my shell even more in mylike everyday life Gotcha.
So so you would you say that youwere prior to that like more
reserved and kind of just likeclosed off a little bit, or yeah
(04:47):
I was doing, I was presentingfor other people, you know, like
trying to be a masculine gayman because I thought that's
what everyone else would wantand what like dating would want.
Kind of shied away from allthat, you know.
I was like, well, what am Idoing?
Why am I not being my authenticself?
(05:07):
And then I did, and it wasthings just started opening,
like a lot of stuff like juststarted happening and it's been
like the best two, three yearsof my life, I have to say.
TJ (05:19):
I love that.
Yeah, I feel like I've and youhave listened to the show as
well and like I've hadconversations with the guests,
um, and even prior to havingguests on the show, um, and I
talk a lot about individualityand creativity and
self-development andself-improvement, and I agree,
it's like you have this almostkind of like switch that happens
(05:40):
Like once you get past acertain age, for for me, it was
29 going into 30 where I finallyfelt I was like, oh, wait a
minute, like I don't have tolike put on for the world, like,
yeah, I can be myself, I can beall different versions of
myself, I don't have to stick towhat the perception of me is.
Yeah, um?
Chethan (06:00):
are you just astrology at all?
TJ (06:02):
a little bit.
My friend, my best friend ismore because, like 29, 30 is
Saturn returning?
Right, so like it usually doeshappen around 30.
Chethan (06:09):
Yeah, yeah, mine was a little later, but yeah.
TJ (06:13):
So with this idea of like coming into your own and really
starting to, I'm going to nameit as like loving yourself even
more.
Yeah to, I'm just.
I'm going to name it as likeloving yourself even more.
Um, what, what has been kind ofthe the like routine or ritual
or um baseline for you of likegetting back to yourself and
(06:35):
like not swaying being in thisnew space?
Chethan (06:40):
Oh my God, Interesting .
Um, I would this is going tosound weird, but it's the
outside right.
Like, starting from the outsidesometimes helps me connect with
the inner, so with me, what,what it was, was fashion and
like my image that I couldcontrol on the outside.
Then stuff started happening onthe inside, happening on the
(07:08):
inside.
So, like I, I don't falter backto that kind of like energy
that much anymore, because Ithink it's been two, three years
of in this like, okay, in thebeginning, maybe a little bit,
because I wasn't good theintention that I was before from
men in that way, although likethe other attention was great,
like people would stop me on thestreet for my clothes and like
say, like you know, my fashionsense had shifted drastically.
So in the beginning, maybe alittle bit Like, especially when
(07:30):
we're going out, maybe I'dthrow on a t-shirt, a pair of
jeans and not wear my crop topand you know, and a high-waisted
pant with like a boot, you know.
But now it's like I'm pretty.
TJ (07:40):
I'm pretty in it.
Do you ever feel as if you haveto compromise that version of
yourself at all, whether it belike family, friends, associates
in work environments or any ofthat kind of stuff?
Chethan (08:02):
So you know what?
Not really anymore, but I didin the past.
Like I remember years ago,especially when I had just been
a year or two, maybe three yearshere.
I was still in college andskinny jeans, right, skinny
jeans like the painted on, and Iwould go home and I grew up in
Indiana and my dad would ask melike maybe don't wear the skinny
(08:26):
skinny jeans when I get home.
But you know, that was backthen.
Now it's not so really I don'treally.
I work in hair during the day,so you know they don't really
care, you can wear reallywhatever you want.
My friends have been prettygood.
They actually like, love myfashion.
So I have to say it's beenpretty okay.
TJ (08:47):
Good, that's amazing.
I know it's been positive.
Chethan (08:49):
I'm like I don't know what happened.
TJ (08:54):
Like really there was a big energy shift.
Yeah, Do you find, speaking offriends, like do you find that
you have surrounded yourselfwith like-minded people being in
this new space for yourself?
Chethan (09:04):
These are my friends of like 10, 12 years and if not
more, and I've never really feltjudgment from them.
Okay, it's totally outside oftheir zone, they don't even
flirt with these kind of things.
I have, however, gotten some ofmy friends up their fashion a
little bit, so that's maybe therub off a little bit on my part,
(09:27):
but they're very supportive,loving and honest.
If I was doing anything wrongor altering or whatever, I think
they would say something, butthey see that I'm in my groove
and in my path and I thinkthat's all that really matters,
that I'm happy, good.
TJ (09:46):
Yeah, I agree there's definitely.
I feel like again when you getto the other side of 30, I feel
like for myself.
That is when I really figuredout who my real friends were and
the people who, because I havefour friends that I've been
friends with since 2003.
(10:07):
They're like still in my lifetoday and all of them are very
like, unique and different andhave different perspectives of
me and based off of ourindividual connections.
But the thing that I love aboutall of them is that they all
recognize, even though there aremany parts of me they all
recognize like the core versionof me which I feel like and I'm
(10:30):
sure you can attest to this oflike being an actor.
It's like you know, you go outinto the world and and there's a
certain version of you thatexists in certain spaces.
But even in this idea of likeowning your individuality, you
can kind of like cover a littlebit of self in those spaces, and
(10:51):
I don't think it's intentional,I think it's a Protective.
Chethan (10:54):
Yeah it's, I don't think it's intentional.
TJ (10:55):
I think it's a protective.
Yeah, it's protective.
It's like you don't want.
You don't want to put all ofyourself out there all the time,
because you need to be able tokeep a piece of yourself to self
um, and so I love that about myfriends, that each of them
knows exactly like your coreversion.
Yeah, the heart of me yeah, um,so I love that, like your
friends are.
Chethan (11:14):
Yeah, I have a good, like mixed kind of group.
Like I have my college friendsthat are like my, like literally
my family now.
Like my best friend fromcollege, his kids are like my
nieces and nephews, like theylike in their family Christmas
card, like that's how like closewe have gotten to you, but
freshman year, yeah, and then Ihave, like my eyes, a couple of
my high school theater friendsthat I still have friends with,
(11:37):
and then I have, like my NewYork City like mm-hmm, outside
of college friends, mm-hmm.
So there's like a good mix andI think everyone really knows
who I am now at this point.
No, and they're, they've beengreat.
TJ (11:46):
Yeah, on the show we talk a lot about self development and
self improvement.
Do you think I Don't know whatis development and
self-improvement?
Do you think I don't?
What is your sign?
Cancer, oh, yes, yes, you toldme this.
You told me this, so I feellike this question will probably
be in line with your emotionalside.
Um, do you feel like you everare, um splitting yourself, like
(12:11):
?
Do you feel like what I'mgetting at is like emotionally,
as emotional beings, and nowsaying out loud that you are a
cancer?
I know that you can probably bevery emotional sometimes.
Uh, do you ever feel likeyou're missing something or
you're off your path, or uh,wanting more out of life, or
(12:31):
like you know, know, like thisinternal struggle that I know
that I have as a Gemini, thatlike I'm always like, oh, I
could be doing this better, oryou know, all the time, all the
time.
Chethan (12:41):
I don't know if that's a cancer thing, or if it's an
actor thing or like a creativething.
Right, like I constantly I'mthinking like, am I doing enough
?
Am I doing my best?
Am I putting out enough to getwhat I want?
And then I have to like stepback and be like well, how much
can you output without takingtime to like input back onto
(13:03):
yourself?
Right, and I luckily have thisamazing friend in LA who I kind
of like soundboard.
She's like my spiritual kind ofreally good friend.
I met when I was working outthere and she does a lot of
stuff online and we talk a lotand she'll kind of like bring me
back, mm-hmm.
Sometimes I'll be like Tammy, Ifeel like there's chaos in my
(13:25):
life, like following meeverywhere, and then she's like,
well, why do you think that?
Mmm, why is chaos finding you?
Yeah, yeah, do you think maybeit's you?
I'm like like mind blow, likestuff like that, where then I
have to think about it.
And then so I've learned somethings to make, to like kind of
try to quiet that part, cause Iget that a lot like from
(13:46):
different projects that I'veworked on and I've you know, I'm
into like astrology andpsychics and tarot cards and a
lot of it is get out of my ownway.
So I I do become very heady in alot of my creative processes or
other things and one of thebiggest things and I know this
for myself is like I do need tostep out of my own way and
that's been kind of like thebiggest learning thing is how to
(14:08):
do that.
TJ (14:08):
Yeah, I get that as as a creative, just continuing that
train of thought.
As a creative, what has beenthe biggest aha moment for you
when it came to getting bothyour creative life and personal
life in line together, like inalignment together?
Chethan (14:34):
That's hard because, probably like the last year, I
think, coming out of college andjust being so, I'm like
desperate, like you aredesperate when you're 22 and you
graduate conservatory or likeyou know whatever, as an, as a
performing major, and you wantto do anything and everything.
And at that time I was likeworking on an EP that I was I
(14:57):
was about to release and, um, Ithought my, I was going to go
more in the music direction, sothen I stopped auditioning and,
um, I kind of fell into likethis weird cycle of just like
doing anything and everything Icould on top of working like a
day job.
And I think the last year,maybe a year or two, is finding
(15:18):
the balance.
We're coming back to thecreative and having control over
it.
So like that was that's whatlike kind of drag gave me, where
I was getting just like tiredof auditioning and getting
further along, maybe booking ajob, but then something
happening and falling through orlike getting cut from this, the
movie or whatever.
(15:39):
Um, and then just the gruelingaudition process like rejection,
rejection, rejection.
Yeah, and drag kind of gave methe opportunity to creatively
control my work and be able towork the way I wanted to, so it
really had changed my life.
I started doing my own brunches, my own shows, and I'm like
this is more fulfilling to methan auditioning every day.
(16:02):
And then through drag is how Igot the show that I'm in now.
I do play a drag queen in thatshow, and then that's now opened
so many other things, so it allkind of worked out.
TJ (16:15):
I love that, speaking of drag cause we not really talked
about it just yet.
What has been your favorite,like moment in drag or
performance, or like creativeendeavor?
Chethan (16:30):
I think it's like living out my Bollywood
childhood fantasy.
Okay.
Like when I started doing drag Igot 12 years ago.
I was doing a lot of likemenswear and I was.
I always did platinum blondehair and I did like blazers and
pants and I wasn't really kindof going in the Indian direction
Cause, like at that time Ididn't tell my parents either
and Indian clothes are expensiveanyways, whatever.
(16:52):
But recently my mom has gottenreally into it and she has like
her Indian clothes from when shewas like 15 to now, so it's
like 50 years in this closet atmy parents' house, jewelry saris
Her closet is bigger than myapartment and I just like take
(17:14):
clothes from her and it is.
It's like I remember watchingBollywood movies and being like
I want to be that actress, Iwant to like.
I want to do that dance numberand that outfit and now I get to
do it and that's been like themost kind of rewarding childhood
nostalgia, living fantasy thingabout my, the drive that I do
(17:38):
now I mean, that's amazing yeah,I love that you have like a
full-on archive of clothing it'sinsane, it's insane yeah has?
TJ (17:47):
has there, um, speaking of clothing, has there been like a
specific piece of clothing, bothin drag and from your personal
wardrobe, that you feel likereally encapsulates, like who
you are as a person?
A piece of clothing like anoutfit or just like a single
piece.
(18:07):
I mean, let's talk, okay.
Chethan (18:10):
Drag wise, I think maybe a sari, like one of my
mom's saris, because like that'skind of been my world recently
and it's different enough and itreally is like who I am.
TJ (18:29):
Like as much as.
Chethan (18:30):
I wear like Western clothes, like I'm in that, like
off the shoulder, but like if Iput on a sari, like something
happens, like something changes.
TJ (18:36):
Magic.
Chethan (18:37):
Magic.
It's.
Something takes over.
Maybe it's the ancestors.
Yeah, I love that and some ofthe like.
I also like model in drag andlike one of I want to call my
photographer friend of mine.
We won a competition to meetlike in a sari or like a lingo.
Yeah to me, like in a sari orlike a lingo.
Yeah, so like somethingbeautiful happens when Indian
clothes is put on Out of drag.
(18:58):
I my style out of drag is soall over the place, but I don't
know if I have one thing okaythere is this like one like
outfit I recently got from LA.
It almost looks a little Indianbecause it's oversized, it's
long and flowy and it's a tealcolor with orange tigers printed
(19:19):
, so it has a little bit of theAsian kind of flair to it.
Nice, nice, and it almost lookslike a kurta, which is like an
Indian male tunic, but long pastyour knees, okay.
TJ (19:38):
Maybe that, oh nice, maybe that male um like a tunic but
like long, like past your knees,okay, um maybe that maybe that.
Chethan (19:42):
Let's say, I live for a good tunic as a tall person,
because my shirts are short forme as a short person.
TJ (19:47):
I the world is your oyster.
It really, is it really?
Chethan (19:51):
is, I don't have to worry about even drag clubs.
Yeah Well, fit into women'squite easily.
TJ (19:57):
If you, I mean I don't know who is listening or watching,
but as my first guest who doesdrag, if anyone was interested
in pursuing it, what advicewould you give them?
Chethan (20:11):
Oh, good question.
Honestly, I started onHalloween, okay, I think a lot
of drag queens, maybe back inthe day, I don't know now
because there was no drag race.
When I started, instagram waslike barely so there wasn't so
much like see, we went to thebars and we saw the drag queens
(20:33):
at like Posh or like.
I remember like one of thefirst girls I ever saw was
Bianca Del Rio in the back atPosh Wow, like doing insult
comedy in the back, and it waslike I remember the one time she
like insulted me I was like yes, it's happened.
That's kind of where I got likemy visual.
And then I had a girlfriend inhigh school who's an amazing
(20:56):
makeup artist.
Her name's Kelly.
She put me in drag for thefirst time and and then would,
if I needed, as I startedgetting a little more into it,
she would help me and I wouldwatch her doing makeup.
I mean, now you have YouTube andyou know Instagram, you can
like yeah but I would say,figure out what you think is
your persona and it can change.
Like you can start in onepersona and as you grow as a
(21:19):
drag artist, like, like mine'scompletely different than when I
first started.
But yeah, the key, I think, isto figure out what your
aesthetic is and what you wantto say as a performer.
Like, are you going to be acomic queen?
Are you going to be a lipsyncer?
Are you going to be a lipsyncer?
Are you going to be all of it?
Like, what direction do youwant to go in?
And start from there and thentry to find a girl that you like
, you like and you're inspiredby and see if they'll take you
(21:42):
on as a daughter.
TJ (21:43):
Nice.
Chethan (21:44):
And start there and then buy up all the wigs you can
.
TJ (21:48):
Has there.
So you just spoke about howyour persona can change.
So you just spoke about howyour persona can change.
How different, would you say,your drag persona now is
compared to the first version.
Chethan (22:00):
I think it was a little chaotic then my drag was
a little chaotic, it's likefeeling it out Like I was doing
it.
I was working at nightlifehosting parties.
The outfits were a littleratchet Okay, the wigs were a
little ratty and dry Okay.
It was a different time.
The makeup maybe not have beenblended so well, but she had a
good time.
She was a baby drag, I thinkmore so like now I'm like more
(22:27):
of a grounded queen, like when Ifirst started.
I was very all over the place,running around with no like
direction.
I just wanted to be in drag andwherever drag took me I'd go.
TJ (22:39):
I think.
Chethan (22:40):
Now it's more like I'm doing it and there's a path, I
know why I'm doing it and I'mdoing it for a specific reason,
instead of just doing it.
Yeah, with purpose, withpurpose.
TJ (22:50):
Yeah, exactly.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah, I feel like there's's,there's.
Life is so much better when youhave purpose, like truly, you
know, I feel like we've gonethrough, and I'm sure you've.
You've had moments in your lifelike where you've just wandered
aimlessly and, yeah, hope thatsomething stuck, and trying to
figure it out as you go, well asa poc queer person, that's a
(23:10):
performer.
Chethan (23:12):
I think a lot of us in that category.
I spent years in that when am I, what am I doing?
Wandering, where is the lightat the end of the tunnel, kind
of thing.
It's there, it's there, and itsometimes takes some people
longer, like I mean, I'm 37 andit's just.
TJ (23:30):
The light is just starting to show, I will say that you
don't look like you're 37.
Oh, thank you, thank you.
Chethan (23:38):
My mom is an esthetician so I like had skin
care, like take care of yourskin my entire life.
Like and swear you're SPF guys.
TJ (23:46):
Yes, yes, yeah, as a bald person, yes, spf is your best
friend.
So I mean, I feel like you'rejust dropping gems and I have to
keep up.
Yeah, what would you like?
Would you say the drag was thelight at the end of the tunnel
for you?
Or like, did something elsekind of align first and then
(24:07):
push you out there?
Chethan (24:11):
It's, yeah, like I mean it started different.
It started a completelydifferent space than it than it
ended up being like.
I started doing it because Iwas like this is fun, I like to
wear girls clothes and wearheels, put on makeup, host
parties.
Because I was in my 20s, um,and then in la, when I stopped
because I had some of mymanagement and agents that told
(24:31):
me to stop doing drag, um, if Iwant to be taken seriously as an
actor.
So I stopped and I did it veryrarely and what I noticed was I
was getting parts more when Iwas in drag.
So then I had to take a stepback and I'm like, well, I
really shouldn't listen to myagent manager and I should just
(24:53):
follow my heart.
And where are the resultscoming?
And then really kind of like,okay, this is, this is where I
fit in in.
This world is in drag.
And once I accepted that andlike you know, I think, more
things started to happen that's.
TJ (25:11):
That's interesting, because I I'm on board with you of like
it's great to haverepresentation right, because
sometimes they can get you intorooms that you can't necessarily
get yourself into.
However, I feel like a lot ofagencies and managers are
(25:31):
looking at their roster as I'mtrying not to be disrespectful
but I say go for a call a lot oflike a lot of people look at
their roster as just what theyphysically can see and not
necessarily the human, and thathas been my and Ashley, who was
(25:54):
in the show with you we talkabout this all the time where,
like, there are parts that existthat we are right for that they
will, for whatever reason, notsubmit us for.
And so a lot of times for mespecifically, I submit myself
for things that I that I'm like,I know exactly who this person
is, who this character is, like.
I'm right for this part, andmost of those instances are the
(26:18):
jobs that I've booked.
Yeah, because you know yourself, right, yeah?
Chethan (26:23):
and it is true like it is great to have representation
because, like you said a lot oftimes, you can't get into space
that you want without them.
But they have like what 30, 40people that they're dealing with
on top of you know yourself andhow well can they.
If you get a good agent, theyknow you pretty well.
But you know when you're firststarting out like there's so
many people that they take careof.
(26:43):
They take care of.
So if they don't know you, ifyou're not one of the first or
whatever, then they just aregoing to look at what you look
like and not know kind of likewhat other avenues to put you
through has there um with yourmanager?
TJ (27:02):
was there like a a turning point after that that drag
conversation of like them notwanting you to submit like or do
drag anymore?
Chethan (27:11):
It was.
It happened to be happening as Iwas moving from New York to LA
and because he didn't have anoffice in LA, the relationship
was already going to end.
So it kind of was like a like agoodbye, no drama really, cause
he had said that and thenliterally like a couple months
later I, he had said that andthen literally like a couple
months later, I was like youknow what, I'm actually going to
(27:32):
move to LA, so it kind of likethat I didn't have to like
battle him about it and it kindof all just like fizzled kind of
nicely.
And then I did have an agent inLA that was like and I was one
of the first people that hesigned because he, like he
started his own agency, and hewas one of the first um people
that he signed because he, likehe started his own um agency and
it he was great.
Like I talked about drag andlike he kind of knew me a little
(27:54):
bit more personally and thatthat was a pretty good
relationship and unfortunately,like he didn't have a new office
so when I moved back here Icouldn't stay with him, gotcha.
TJ (28:02):
Yeah, that sucks.
I wish more people could bebi-coastal, because there's like
I've been trying to break intothe voiceover space, but so much
of that work exists in la andit's very like small, small,
small parts here in new yorkcity.
Um, even with being remote,it's like they still want you
physically.
Yeah, that's crazy, yeah, it'svery weird, but because, like,
(28:24):
especially voiceover, you'relike why do you literally can do
you can do it anywhere.
Chethan (28:27):
Yeah like, you have a setup right here.
Yeah like why, do you need togo into the studio?
TJ (28:31):
it's very weird thank you for doing this.
Oh my god, this has beenamazing.
Yes, um, I would love to haveyou back if you're down for it
anytime I love it.
I love this uh, so threequestions, yeah.
First one where do you find themost love?
Chethan (28:52):
Oh my God, you know, I want to say myself that's fair.
If that's like.
I don't want to sound so cliche, but I've worked pretty hard on
myself the last couple of yearsand I have to say like I don't
have a partner, I'm single, soit's been a lot of myself.
And then I luckily have theseamazing nieces and nephews that
I see at least a couple of timesa month and they are so much
(29:14):
joy and I just like look at themand I'm so in love and like if
I need to look at a littlerecharge, I go up there and then
like they scream and run andgive you a hug and like they're
so excited to see you and thatjust like kind of reminds you
that you are loved in all spaces, that you know that you're good
in and so yeah, that's where.
TJ (29:34):
What inspires you the most?
Chethan (29:35):
What inspires me the most, I think this kind of weird
need to want to shift theperspective on queer Indian
entertainers.
You know, like there's so manyIndian people in this world and
(29:59):
there's like even lessrepresentation of us, especially
here, and that kind of fuels me.
That kind of fuels me, thatkind of inspires me.
It's like I want to F up thefucking baseline on this.
Like why aren't we everywhereLike?
Why aren't we in fashion?
Why aren't we like you know,like more of this, like more
queer Indian drag, more queerIndian spaces and like
(30:22):
performances and all that Like?
So that in the back of my mindis like I'm trying to create
those things.
TJ (30:30):
Yeah, yeah, we need way more representation in this world.
I'm like this world is so muchmore diverse than we like to
pretend that it isn't.
Um, and then final questionwhere would you be if you were
not in New York City?
Chethan (30:49):
so I tried LA for five years and I, you know, I went
because, like, where else wouldyou go as a performer?
Mm-hmm.
And plus like sunshine andgorgeous weather, but something
in me like, if I wasn't here,london, I've never been, mmm,
but I don't know why, all over,like years, and like London,
london be a good spot, like Idon't know why, for like years,
and like London, london be agood spot, like I don't know,
(31:12):
something is very enticing aboutLondon.
Thank you so much for doingthis.
Thank you for having me.
This was fun.
TJ (31:16):
This has been so much fun.
I would love to have you backWhenever, and I hope you have.
I mean, new York is a littlerainy today.
Yeah, hopefully today goes well.
Chethan (31:27):
I know.
TJ (31:28):
Thank you for squeezing me in on your busy day.
Thanks so much for listening.
Friends.
That is our show and I will seeyou next week and that's our
show.
Friends, Thanks for joining uson Tea with TJ.
Please rate, review andsubscribe, and you can find us
on Instagram at Tea with TJpodcast.
(31:50):
And, as always, stay kind, keepsipping and remember we're here
, so we might as well do it.
Hey friends, it's TJ, and you're listening to Tea with TJ,
where our love for tea,conversation and
self-improvement intersect.
So let's take a deeper diveinto my cup and let's have a
chat.
Hey friends, it's TJ.
Welcome back to another episodeof Tea with TJ, and today we're
(00:40):
having some mystic mint tea,and I have a very special guest
for you.
Please introduce yourself.
Chethan (00:46):
Hi everyone, I'm Chathan.
TJ (00:50):
That's love it and give us a little, a little bit of
background about yourself.
Chethan (00:55):
I live here in New York City.
I'm an actor, drag queen,singer, dancer, kind of gamut of
all kinds of performing Love it, love it.
I've been here almost 15 years.
Did a list in LA.
Came back because New York isNew York or nowhere.
TJ (01:12):
Yeah, same.
Chethan (01:13):
She's my girl.
Yeah, she's my girl.
TJ (01:15):
So we met just for a little bit of background, for the folks
watching and listening.
We met while you were doing ashow a immersive theater
production, to say the least.
And you were doing a show animmersive theater production, to
say the least and you weresitting next to me and for I
would say, like the first 20minutes, I did not know that you
were a part of the show.
Oh my God, good yeah.
Chethan (01:35):
So you were doing your job, okay great, because I
wasn't sure, because you know,we were interacting and asking
about, like the guy that waswaiting for, and so I was like,
okay, do they know, do they notknow?
But this is good, Good to know.
Yeah, I mean it was.
TJ (01:47):
It was really, really good.
So, with all of that, we metafter the show was over and I
had a chance to like get to knowyou a little bit and introduce
myself and asked you to come onthe show.
So I'm so excited.
Chethan (02:01):
Me too.
TJ (02:13):
My first podcast, yeah, so when I gave you the topic
discussions, you chose owningyour individuality, which is so
amazing, and I love it becauseno one ever chooses that topic.
Yeah, so I'm curious to knowwhat like jumped out to you with
that topic.
Chethan (02:25):
I think that's jumped to me because that's kind of
been my journey recently, Ithink the last couple of years,
like starting 2021, kind of likecoming out of the pandemic I
just moved back to New York fromLA early 2020, like two or
three weeks before the lockdownstarted.
So coming out of that being awayfrom the city with family for
(02:46):
seven, eight months, then comingto the city and everything was
different I really had to likesit with myself and you know,
I'm 37 now but 33, 34 then, andit was a big shift of like who
am I and how do I want to be inthis world?
And like, for me, my drag in myreal life was very separate.
(03:10):
I made a very conscious effortto keep like the feminine away
from the masculine type of thingjust based on like the industry
.
And you know, until recently,like drag queens weren't as the
thing that they are now becauseof drag race.
Like my agent said, you know,you should really not do drag,
all that kind of stuff.
So I really kept it beingseparate.
(03:31):
But things started to kind ofshift and that was my like last
two, two years, three years oflike really coming into my own.
TJ (03:43):
So with with that kind of being the catalyst for that
mindset shift um what has beenlike the biggest lesson you've
learned and being able to likeown your individuality in that
way, people are more acceptingthan they think okay, which is
surprising.
Chethan (04:00):
Yeah, like I was really worried about, you know,
kind of mixing the masculine andfeminine in my daily life.
I always have a great intofashion, but really kind of
pushing my fashion choices, likesometimes wearing a little
black leather mini skirt with atank top and boots, or kind of
exploring that mixing ofquote-unquote feminine fashion
(04:23):
with my daily life.
I thought it was going to be alot more like hit with kind of
negativity and it wasn't, andthat kind of like made me come
out of my shell even more in mylike everyday life Gotcha.
So so you would you say that youwere prior to that like more
reserved and kind of just likeclosed off a little bit, or yeah
(04:47):
I was doing, I was presentingfor other people, you know, like
trying to be a masculine gayman because I thought that's
what everyone else would wantand what like dating would want.
Kind of shied away from allthat, you know.
I was like, well, what am Idoing?
Why am I not being my authenticself?
(05:07):
And then I did, and it wasthings just started opening,
like a lot of stuff like juststarted happening and it's been
like the best two, three yearsof my life, I have to say.
TJ (05:19):
I love that.
Yeah, I feel like I've and youhave listened to the show as
well and like I've hadconversations with the guests,
um, and even prior to havingguests on the show, um, and I
talk a lot about individualityand creativity and
self-development andself-improvement, and I agree,
it's like you have this almostkind of like switch that happens
(05:40):
Like once you get past acertain age, for for me, it was
29 going into 30 where I finallyfelt I was like, oh, wait a
minute, like I don't have tolike put on for the world, like,
yeah, I can be myself, I can beall different versions of
myself, I don't have to stick towhat the perception of me is.
Yeah, um?
Chethan (06:00):
are you just astrology at all?
TJ (06:02):
a little bit.
My friend, my best friend ismore because, like 29, 30 is
Saturn returning?
Right, so like it usually doeshappen around 30.
Chethan (06:09):
Yeah, yeah, mine was a little later, but yeah.
TJ (06:13):
So with this idea of like coming into your own and really
starting to, I'm going to nameit as like loving yourself even
more.
Yeah to, I'm just.
I'm going to name it as likeloving yourself even more.
Um, what, what has been kind ofthe the like routine or ritual
or um baseline for you of likegetting back to yourself and
(06:35):
like not swaying being in thisnew space?
Chethan (06:40):
Oh my God, Interesting .
Um, I would this is going tosound weird, but it's the
outside right.
Like, starting from the outsidesometimes helps me connect with
the inner, so with me, what,what it was, was fashion and
like my image that I couldcontrol on the outside.
Then stuff started happening onthe inside, happening on the
(07:08):
inside.
So, like I, I don't falter backto that kind of like energy
that much anymore, because Ithink it's been two, three years
of in this like, okay, in thebeginning, maybe a little bit,
because I wasn't good theintention that I was before from
men in that way, although likethe other attention was great,
like people would stop me on thestreet for my clothes and like
say, like you know, my fashionsense had shifted drastically.
So in the beginning, maybe alittle bit Like, especially when
(07:30):
we're going out, maybe I'dthrow on a t-shirt, a pair of
jeans and not wear my crop topand you know, and a high-waisted
pant with like a boot, you know.
But now it's like I'm pretty.
TJ (07:40):
I'm pretty in it.
Do you ever feel as if you haveto compromise that version of
yourself at all, whether it belike family, friends, associates
in work environments or any ofthat kind of stuff?
Chethan (08:02):
So you know what?
Not really anymore, but I didin the past.
Like I remember years ago,especially when I had just been
a year or two, maybe three yearshere.
I was still in college andskinny jeans, right, skinny
jeans like the painted on, and Iwould go home and I grew up in
Indiana and my dad would ask melike maybe don't wear the skinny
(08:26):
skinny jeans when I get home.
But you know, that was backthen.
Now it's not so really I don'treally.
I work in hair during the day,so you know they don't really
care, you can wear reallywhatever you want.
My friends have been prettygood.
They actually like, love myfashion.
So I have to say it's beenpretty okay.
TJ (08:47):
Good, that's amazing.
I know it's been positive.
Chethan (08:49):
I'm like I don't know what happened.
TJ (08:54):
Like really there was a big energy shift.
Yeah, Do you find, speaking offriends, like do you find that
you have surrounded yourselfwith like-minded people being in
this new space for yourself?
Chethan (09:04):
These are my friends of like 10, 12 years and if not
more, and I've never really feltjudgment from them.
Okay, it's totally outside oftheir zone, they don't even
flirt with these kind of things.
I have, however, gotten some ofmy friends up their fashion a
little bit, so that's maybe therub off a little bit on my part,
(09:27):
but they're very supportive,loving and honest.
If I was doing anything wrongor altering or whatever, I think
they would say something, butthey see that I'm in my groove
and in my path and I thinkthat's all that really matters,
that I'm happy, good.
TJ (09:46):
Yeah, I agree there's definitely.
I feel like again when you getto the other side of 30, I feel
like for myself.
That is when I really figuredout who my real friends were and
the people who, because I havefour friends that I've been
friends with since 2003.
(10:07):
They're like still in my lifetoday and all of them are very
like, unique and different andhave different perspectives of
me and based off of ourindividual connections.
But the thing that I love aboutall of them is that they all
recognize, even though there aremany parts of me they all
recognize like the core versionof me which I feel like and I'm
(10:30):
sure you can attest to this oflike being an actor.
It's like you know, you go outinto the world and and there's a
certain version of you thatexists in certain spaces.
But even in this idea of likeowning your individuality, you
can kind of like cover a littlebit of self in those spaces, and
(10:51):
I don't think it's intentional,I think it's a Protective.
Chethan (10:54):
Yeah it's, I don't think it's intentional.
TJ (10:55):
I think it's a protective.
Yeah, it's protective.
It's like you don't want.
You don't want to put all ofyourself out there all the time,
because you need to be able tokeep a piece of yourself to self
um, and so I love that about myfriends, that each of them
knows exactly like your coreversion.
Yeah, the heart of me yeah, um,so I love that, like your
friends are.
Chethan (11:14):
Yeah, I have a good, like mixed kind of group.
Like I have my college friendsthat are like my, like literally
my family now.
Like my best friend fromcollege, his kids are like my
nieces and nephews, like theylike in their family Christmas
card, like that's how like closewe have gotten to you, but
freshman year, yeah, and then Ihave, like my eyes, a couple of
my high school theater friendsthat I still have friends with,
(11:37):
and then I have, like my NewYork City like mm-hmm, outside
of college friends, mm-hmm.
So there's like a good mix andI think everyone really knows
who I am now at this point.
No, and they're, they've beengreat.
TJ (11:46):
Yeah, on the show we talk a lot about self development and
self improvement.
Do you think I Don't know whatis development and
self-improvement?
Do you think I don't?
What is your sign?
Cancer, oh, yes, yes, you toldme this.
You told me this, so I feellike this question will probably
be in line with your emotionalside.
Um, do you feel like you everare, um splitting yourself, like
(12:11):
?
Do you feel like what I'mgetting at is like emotionally,
as emotional beings, and nowsaying out loud that you are a
cancer?
I know that you can probably bevery emotional sometimes.
Uh, do you ever feel likeyou're missing something or
you're off your path, or uh,wanting more out of life, or
(12:31):
like you know, know, like thisinternal struggle that I know
that I have as a Gemini, thatlike I'm always like, oh, I
could be doing this better, oryou know, all the time, all the
time.
Chethan (12:41):
I don't know if that's a cancer thing, or if it's an
actor thing or like a creativething.
Right, like I constantly I'mthinking like, am I doing enough
?
Am I doing my best?
Am I putting out enough to getwhat I want?
And then I have to like stepback and be like well, how much
can you output without takingtime to like input back onto
(13:03):
yourself?
Right, and I luckily have thisamazing friend in LA who I kind
of like soundboard.
She's like my spiritual kind ofreally good friend.
I met when I was working outthere and she does a lot of
stuff online and we talk a lotand she'll kind of like bring me
back, mm-hmm.
Sometimes I'll be like Tammy, Ifeel like there's chaos in my
(13:25):
life, like following meeverywhere, and then she's like,
well, why do you think that?
Mmm, why is chaos finding you?
Yeah, yeah, do you think maybeit's you?
I'm like like mind blow, likestuff like that, where then I
have to think about it.
And then so I've learned somethings to make, to like kind of
try to quiet that part, cause Iget that a lot like from
(13:46):
different projects that I'veworked on and I've you know, I'm
into like astrology andpsychics and tarot cards and a
lot of it is get out of my ownway.
So I I do become very heady in alot of my creative processes or
other things and one of thebiggest things and I know this
for myself is like I do need tostep out of my own way and
that's been kind of like thebiggest learning thing is how to
(14:08):
do that.
TJ (14:08):
Yeah, I get that as as a creative, just continuing that
train of thought.
As a creative, what has beenthe biggest aha moment for you
when it came to getting bothyour creative life and personal
life in line together, like inalignment together?
Chethan (14:34):
That's hard because, probably like the last year, I
think, coming out of college andjust being so, I'm like
desperate, like you aredesperate when you're 22 and you
graduate conservatory or likeyou know whatever, as an, as a
performing major, and you wantto do anything and everything.
And at that time I was likeworking on an EP that I was I
(14:57):
was about to release and, um, Ithought my, I was going to go
more in the music direction, sothen I stopped auditioning and,
um, I kind of fell into likethis weird cycle of just like
doing anything and everything Icould on top of working like a
day job.
And I think the last year,maybe a year or two, is finding
(15:18):
the balance.
We're coming back to thecreative and having control over
it.
So like that was that's whatlike kind of drag gave me, where
I was getting just like tiredof auditioning and getting
further along, maybe booking ajob, but then something
happening and falling through orlike getting cut from this, the
movie or whatever.
(15:39):
Um, and then just the gruelingaudition process like rejection,
rejection, rejection.
Yeah, and drag kind of gave methe opportunity to creatively
control my work and be able towork the way I wanted to, so it
really had changed my life.
I started doing my own brunches, my own shows, and I'm like
this is more fulfilling to methan auditioning every day.
(16:02):
And then through drag is how Igot the show that I'm in now.
I do play a drag queen in thatshow, and then that's now opened
so many other things, so it allkind of worked out.
TJ (16:15):
I love that, speaking of drag cause we not really talked
about it just yet.
What has been your favorite,like moment in drag or
performance, or like creativeendeavor?
Chethan (16:30):
I think it's like living out my Bollywood
childhood fantasy.
Okay.
Like when I started doing drag Igot 12 years ago.
I was doing a lot of likemenswear and I was.
I always did platinum blondehair and I did like blazers and
pants and I wasn't really kindof going in the Indian direction
Cause, like at that time Ididn't tell my parents either
and Indian clothes are expensiveanyways, whatever.
(16:52):
But recently my mom has gottenreally into it and she has like
her Indian clothes from when shewas like 15 to now, so it's
like 50 years in this closet atmy parents' house, jewelry saris
Her closet is bigger than myapartment and I just like take
(17:14):
clothes from her and it is.
It's like I remember watchingBollywood movies and being like
I want to be that actress, Iwant to like.
I want to do that dance numberand that outfit and now I get to
do it and that's been like themost kind of rewarding childhood
nostalgia, living fantasy thingabout my, the drive that I do
(17:38):
now I mean, that's amazing yeah,I love that you have like a
full-on archive of clothing it'sinsane, it's insane yeah has?
TJ (17:47):
has there, um, speaking of clothing, has there been like a
specific piece of clothing, bothin drag and from your personal
wardrobe, that you feel likereally encapsulates, like who
you are as a person?
A piece of clothing like anoutfit or just like a single
piece.
(18:07):
I mean, let's talk, okay.
Chethan (18:10):
Drag wise, I think maybe a sari, like one of my
mom's saris, because like that'skind of been my world recently
and it's different enough and itreally is like who I am.
TJ (18:29):
Like as much as.
Chethan (18:30):
I wear like Western clothes, like I'm in that, like
off the shoulder, but like if Iput on a sari, like something
happens, like something changes.
TJ (18:36):
Magic.
Chethan (18:37):
Magic.
It's.
Something takes over.
Maybe it's the ancestors.
Yeah, I love that and some ofthe like.
I also like model in drag andlike one of I want to call my
photographer friend of mine.
We won a competition to meetlike in a sari or like a lingo.
Yeah to me, like in a sari orlike a lingo.
Yeah, so like somethingbeautiful happens when Indian
clothes is put on Out of drag.
(18:58):
I my style out of drag is soall over the place, but I don't
know if I have one thing okaythere is this like one like
outfit I recently got from LA.
It almost looks a little Indianbecause it's oversized, it's
long and flowy and it's a tealcolor with orange tigers printed
(19:19):
, so it has a little bit of theAsian kind of flair to it.
Nice, nice, and it almost lookslike a kurta, which is like an
Indian male tunic, but long pastyour knees, okay.
TJ (19:38):
Maybe that, oh nice, maybe that male um like a tunic but
like long, like past your knees,okay, um maybe that maybe that.
Chethan (19:42):
Let's say, I live for a good tunic as a tall person,
because my shirts are short forme as a short person.
TJ (19:47):
I the world is your oyster.
It really, is it really?
Chethan (19:51):
is, I don't have to worry about even drag clubs.
Yeah Well, fit into women'squite easily.
TJ (19:57):
If you, I mean I don't know who is listening or watching,
but as my first guest who doesdrag, if anyone was interested
in pursuing it, what advicewould you give them?
Chethan (20:11):
Oh, good question.
Honestly, I started onHalloween, okay, I think a lot
of drag queens, maybe back inthe day, I don't know now
because there was no drag race.
When I started, instagram waslike barely so there wasn't so
much like see, we went to thebars and we saw the drag queens
(20:33):
at like Posh or like.
I remember like one of thefirst girls I ever saw was
Bianca Del Rio in the back atPosh Wow, like doing insult
comedy in the back, and it waslike I remember the one time she
like insulted me I was like yes, it's happened.
That's kind of where I got likemy visual.
And then I had a girlfriend inhigh school who's an amazing
(20:56):
makeup artist.
Her name's Kelly.
She put me in drag for thefirst time and and then would,
if I needed, as I startedgetting a little more into it,
she would help me and I wouldwatch her doing makeup.
I mean, now you have YouTube andyou know Instagram, you can
like yeah but I would say,figure out what you think is
your persona and it can change.
Like you can start in onepersona and as you grow as a
(21:19):
drag artist, like, like mine'scompletely different than when I
first started.
But yeah, the key, I think, isto figure out what your
aesthetic is and what you wantto say as a performer.
Like, are you going to be acomic queen?
Are you going to be a lipsyncer?
Are you going to be a lipsyncer?
Are you going to be all of it?
Like, what direction do youwant to go in?
And start from there and thentry to find a girl that you like
, you like and you're inspiredby and see if they'll take you
(21:42):
on as a daughter.
TJ (21:43):
Nice.
Chethan (21:44):
And start there and then buy up all the wigs you can
.
TJ (21:48):
Has there.
So you just spoke about howyour persona can change.
So you just spoke about howyour persona can change.
How different, would you say,your drag persona now is
compared to the first version.
Chethan (22:00):
I think it was a little chaotic then my drag was
a little chaotic, it's likefeeling it out Like I was doing
it.
I was working at nightlifehosting parties.
The outfits were a littleratchet Okay, the wigs were a
little ratty and dry Okay.
It was a different time.
The makeup maybe not have beenblended so well, but she had a
good time.
She was a baby drag, I thinkmore so like now I'm like more
(22:27):
of a grounded queen, like when Ifirst started.
I was very all over the place,running around with no like
direction.
I just wanted to be in drag andwherever drag took me I'd go.
TJ (22:39):
I think.
Chethan (22:40):
Now it's more like I'm doing it and there's a path, I
know why I'm doing it and I'mdoing it for a specific reason,
instead of just doing it.
Yeah, with purpose, withpurpose.
TJ (22:50):
Yeah, exactly.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah, I feel like there's's,there's.
Life is so much better when youhave purpose, like truly, you
know, I feel like we've gonethrough, and I'm sure you've.
You've had moments in your lifelike where you've just wandered
aimlessly and, yeah, hope thatsomething stuck, and trying to
figure it out as you go, well asa poc queer person, that's a
(23:10):
performer.
Chethan (23:12):
I think a lot of us in that category.
I spent years in that when am I, what am I doing?
Wandering, where is the lightat the end of the tunnel, kind
of thing.
It's there, it's there, and itsometimes takes some people
longer, like I mean, I'm 37 andit's just.
TJ (23:30):
The light is just starting to show, I will say that you
don't look like you're 37.
Oh, thank you, thank you.
Chethan (23:38):
My mom is an esthetician so I like had skin
care, like take care of yourskin my entire life.
Like and swear you're SPF guys.
TJ (23:46):
Yes, yes, yeah, as a bald person, yes, spf is your best
friend.
So I mean, I feel like you'rejust dropping gems and I have to
keep up.
Yeah, what would you like?
Would you say the drag was thelight at the end of the tunnel
for you?
Or like, did something elsekind of align first and then
(24:07):
push you out there?
Chethan (24:11):
It's, yeah, like I mean it started different.
It started a completelydifferent space than it than it
ended up being like.
I started doing it because Iwas like this is fun, I like to
wear girls clothes and wearheels, put on makeup, host
parties.
Because I was in my 20s, um,and then in la, when I stopped
because I had some of mymanagement and agents that told
(24:31):
me to stop doing drag, um, if Iwant to be taken seriously as an
actor.
So I stopped and I did it veryrarely and what I noticed was I
was getting parts more when Iwas in drag.
So then I had to take a stepback and I'm like, well, I
really shouldn't listen to myagent manager and I should just
(24:53):
follow my heart.
And where are the resultscoming?
And then really kind of like,okay, this is, this is where I
fit in in.
This world is in drag.
And once I accepted that andlike you know, I think, more
things started to happen that's.
TJ (25:11):
That's interesting, because I I'm on board with you of like
it's great to haverepresentation right, because
sometimes they can get you intorooms that you can't necessarily
get yourself into.
However, I feel like a lot ofagencies and managers are
(25:31):
looking at their roster as I'mtrying not to be disrespectful
but I say go for a call a lot oflike a lot of people look at
their roster as just what theyphysically can see and not
necessarily the human, and thathas been my and Ashley, who was
(25:54):
in the show with you we talkabout this all the time where,
like, there are parts that existthat we are right for that they
will, for whatever reason, notsubmit us for.
And so a lot of times for mespecifically, I submit myself
for things that I that I'm like,I know exactly who this person
is, who this character is, like.
I'm right for this part, andmost of those instances are the
(26:18):
jobs that I've booked.
Yeah, because you know yourself, right, yeah?
Chethan (26:23):
and it is true like it is great to have representation
because, like you said a lot oftimes, you can't get into space
that you want without them.
But they have like what 30, 40people that they're dealing with
on top of you know yourself andhow well can they.
If you get a good agent, theyknow you pretty well.
But you know when you're firststarting out like there's so
many people that they take careof.
(26:43):
They take care of.
So if they don't know you, ifyou're not one of the first or
whatever, then they just aregoing to look at what you look
like and not know kind of likewhat other avenues to put you
through has there um with yourmanager?
TJ (27:02):
was there like a a turning point after that that drag
conversation of like them notwanting you to submit like or do
drag anymore?
Chethan (27:11):
It was.
It happened to be happening as Iwas moving from New York to LA
and because he didn't have anoffice in LA, the relationship
was already going to end.
So it kind of was like a like agoodbye, no drama really, cause
he had said that and thenliterally like a couple months
later I, he had said that andthen literally like a couple
months later, I was like youknow what, I'm actually going to
(27:32):
move to LA, so it kind of likethat I didn't have to like
battle him about it and it kindof all just like fizzled kind of
nicely.
And then I did have an agent inLA that was like and I was one
of the first people that hesigned because he, like he
started his own agency, and hewas one of the first um people
that he signed because he, likehe started his own um agency and
it he was great.
Like I talked about drag andlike he kind of knew me a little
(27:54):
bit more personally and thatthat was a pretty good
relationship and unfortunately,like he didn't have a new office
so when I moved back here Icouldn't stay with him, gotcha.
TJ (28:02):
Yeah, that sucks.
I wish more people could bebi-coastal, because there's like
I've been trying to break intothe voiceover space, but so much
of that work exists in la andit's very like small, small,
small parts here in new yorkcity.
Um, even with being remote,it's like they still want you
physically.
Yeah, that's crazy, yeah, it'svery weird, but because, like,
(28:24):
especially voiceover, you'relike why do you literally can do
you can do it anywhere.
Chethan (28:27):
Yeah like, you have a setup right here.
Yeah like why, do you need togo into the studio?
TJ (28:31):
it's very weird thank you for doing this.
Oh my god, this has beenamazing.
Yes, um, I would love to haveyou back if you're down for it
anytime I love it.
I love this uh, so threequestions, yeah.
First one where do you find themost love?
Chethan (28:52):
Oh my God, you know, I want to say myself that's fair.
If that's like.
I don't want to sound so cliche, but I've worked pretty hard on
myself the last couple of yearsand I have to say like I don't
have a partner, I'm single, soit's been a lot of myself.
And then I luckily have theseamazing nieces and nephews that
I see at least a couple of timesa month and they are so much
(29:14):
joy and I just like look at themand I'm so in love and like if
I need to look at a littlerecharge, I go up there and then
like they scream and run andgive you a hug and like they're
so excited to see you and thatjust like kind of reminds you
that you are loved in all spaces, that you know that you're good
in and so yeah, that's where.
TJ (29:34):
What inspires you the most?
Chethan (29:35):
What inspires me the most, I think this kind of weird
need to want to shift theperspective on queer Indian
entertainers.
You know, like there's so manyIndian people in this world and
(29:59):
there's like even lessrepresentation of us, especially
here, and that kind of fuels me.
That kind of fuels me, thatkind of inspires me.
It's like I want to F up thefucking baseline on this.
Like why aren't we everywhereLike?
Why aren't we in fashion?
Why aren't we like you know,like more of this, like more
queer Indian drag, more queerIndian spaces and like
(30:22):
performances and all that Like?
So that in the back of my mindis like I'm trying to create
those things.
TJ (30:30):
Yeah, yeah, we need way more representation in this world.
I'm like this world is so muchmore diverse than we like to
pretend that it isn't.
Um, and then final questionwhere would you be if you were
not in New York City?
Chethan (30:49):
so I tried LA for five years and I, you know, I went
because, like, where else wouldyou go as a performer?
Mm-hmm.
And plus like sunshine andgorgeous weather, but something
in me like, if I wasn't here,london, I've never been, mmm,
but I don't know why, all over,like years, and like London,
london be a good spot, like Idon't know why, for like years,
and like London, london be agood spot, like I don't know,
(31:12):
something is very enticing aboutLondon.
Thank you so much for doingthis.
Thank you for having me.
This was fun.
TJ (31:16):
This has been so much fun.
I would love to have you backWhenever, and I hope you have.
I mean, new York is a littlerainy today.
Yeah, hopefully today goes well.
Chethan (31:27):
I know.
TJ (31:28):
Thank you for squeezing me in on your busy day.
Thanks so much for listening.
Friends.
That is our show and I will seeyou next week and that's our
show.
Friends, Thanks for joining uson Tea with TJ.
Please rate, review andsubscribe, and you can find us
on Instagram at Tea with TJpodcast.
(31:50):
And, as always, stay kind, keepsipping and remember we're here
, so we might as well do it.
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