What Should I Do if a Parent is Unresponsive?

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"Hello, and welcome back to Teaching with Valor, where we tackle the real questions that teachers face in their classrooms every day. I’m your host, Don Fessenden, and today we’re diving into a challenging topic: What should I do if a parent is unresponsive?

In education, we talk a lot about the importance of communication between teachers and parents. We know that when parents are actively involved in their child’s education, it can make a significant difference in that child’s academic performance and well-being. But what happens when you’re trying your best to reach out, and you’re met with silence? Whether it’s unreturned emails, ignored calls, or no-shows at conferences, an unresponsive parent can be frustrating and, at times, discouraging.

Today, we’ll explore strategies to reach those parents who seem out of reach. We’ll discuss ways to ensure your efforts are consistent and proactive, and we’ll cover how to maintain your focus on the student, even when parental involvement is lacking. We’ll talk about strategies specific to elementary, middle, and high school levels and share ideas on how to document your efforts to engage parents. And for our parent listeners, we have a bonus segment at the end on what teachers can do to support students when parental involvement is limited.


Show Notes

Resources and References:
•Edutopia – Engaging Hard-to-Reach Parents: www.edutopia.org - Strategies for involving parents who are less likely to engage.
•Understood – Tips for Communicating with Parents: Effective methods for reaching out to parents in different situations.
•National PTA – Tools for Building Parent-Teacher Partnerships: Tools and strategies for fostering strong parent-teacher connections.
•Scholastic – Overcoming Parent Communication Challenges: Advice for teachers facing barriers in parent communication.
•Remind – A Communication Tool for Schools: A digital tool for easy and consistent messaging with parents.


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Stay tuned for more episodes, and remember, every student is unique, and every classroom can be a place where all students succeed. Keep teaching with valor!

Episode Transcript

Don (00:09):
"Welcome to Teaching with Valor, the podcast where we dive
into the heart of education,helping teachers, parents, and
students thrive.
I’m your host, Don Fessenden,and if you’re passionate about
making a difference ineducation, you’ve come to the
right place.
Before we jump into today’s deepdive episode, I’d like to ask

(00:30):
for your support.
If you find value in theseconversations, please take a
moment to like, subscribe, andshare this podcast with your
fellow educators and parents.
Your support helps us reach alarger audience, empowering more
teachers and families tonavigate the challenges of
education with confidence andcourage.

(00:50):
So hit that subscribe button,share this episode, and let’s
continue to grow this communitytogether.
Today we’re diving into achallenging topic: What should I
do if a parent is unresponsive?
In education, we talk a lotabout the importance of
communication between teachersand parents.
We know that when parents areactively involved in their

(01:12):
child’s education, it can make asignificant difference in that
child’s academic performance andwell-being.
But what happens when you’retrying your best to reach out,
and you’re met with silence?
Whether it’s unreturned emails,ignored calls, or no-shows at
conferences, an unresponsiveparent can be frustrating and,

(01:32):
at times, discouraging.
Today, we’ll explore strategiesto reach those parents who seem
out of reach.
We’ll discuss ways to ensureyour efforts are consistent and
proactive, and we’ll cover howto maintain your focus on the
student, even when parentalinvolvement is lacking.
We’ll talk about strategiesspecific to elementary, middle,

(01:54):
and high school levels and shareideas on how to document your
efforts to engage parents.
And for our parent listeners, wehave a bonus segment at the end
on what teachers can do tosupport students when parental
involvement is limited.
So, let’s jump in and look athow teachers can make the best
of this challenging situation."In our first segment we look at

(02:17):
Understanding the Root ofUnresponsiveness.
"Before we discuss strategies,it’s important to take a moment
to understand why a parent mightbe unresponsive.
Often, when we reach out toparents and don’t get a reply,
it can feel personal—likethey’re dismissing our efforts
or don’t value the work we do.
But the reality is usually muchmore complex.

(02:40):
There are many reasons a parentmight not respond to
communication from a teacher,and understanding these reasons
can help us approach thesituation with empathy rather
than frustration.
In some cases, a parent’s lackof response might stem from
logistical issues.
They may be working long hours,have limited access to

(03:01):
technology, or face languagebarriers that make it
challenging to engage withschool communication.
Imagine being a single parentwith two jobs—answering an email
from a teacher might not be atthe top of their to-do list.
Or perhaps the parent speaks adifferent language and struggles
with written English, makingemails and messages difficult to

(03:23):
interpret and respond to.
In other cases, a parent mightbe unresponsive because of a
history of negative schoolexperiences.
For example, parents whostruggled in school themselves
may feel intimidated by teachersor uncomfortable participating
in school matters.
They might assume that reachingout means there’s something

(03:43):
negative happening with theirchild, and they could be
avoiding what they expect to bea difficult conversation.
It’s also possible that a parentdoesn’t understand the
importance of schoolcommunication.
Some parents, especially at thesecondary level, may believe
that if their child isn’t introuble, there’s no need to
respond to teacher messages.

(04:05):
This can be particularly commonin high school, where parents
often assume their teenager willhandle school matters
independently.
Knowing these potential reasonscan remind us to approach
unresponsive parents withpatience and open-mindedness.
It also helps us to trydifferent methods of
communication, which brings usto our next step: finding the

(04:27):
most effective ways to reachout.""Now that we’ve considered
the‘why’ behindunresponsiveness, let’s move on
to some practical strategies forreaching out to parents who may
be difficult to connect with.""When a parent doesn’t respond
to our usual methods ofcommunication, it’s time to get
creative.

(04:47):
Different families respond todifferent types of outreach, so
trying a variety of methods canincrease your chances of getting
a response.
Let’s start with digitalcommunication, which is often
our first line of contact.
If emails go unanswered,consider switching to text
messages or apps like Remind orClassDojo, which make it easy

(05:09):
for parents to receive quickupdates without having to log in
to their email.
Many parents prefer text-basedapps over email because they’re
used to texting and find it moreconvenient to check on the go.
For example, sending a simplemessage like,‘Hi Mr.
Doe, this is Ms.
Jones.
I just wanted to touch baseabout James and see if we can

(05:32):
connect for a few minutes thisweek’ can feel less formal and
more approachable than an email.
Another effective option,especially for elementary and
middle school teachers, is tosend home a note or letter with
the student.
Make sure the message is brief,clear, and inviting.
Encourage the student to givethe note to their parent

(05:53):
directly.
This approach can be especiallyuseful for parents who may not
check digital communicationoften.
If you have phone numbers forparents, try calling.
Sometimes a short phoneconversation is all it takes to
establish contact.
When leaving a voicemail, keepit friendly and state clearly
why you’re reaching out.

(06:15):
For instance, you could say,‘Hi,this is Ms.
Jones, James' teacher.
I’d love to connect with you toshare some updates on James'
progress.
Please feel free to call meback, or if it’s easier, let me
know a convenient time to reachout again.’ Don’t forget about
in-person opportunities either.
Back-to-school nights,parent-teacher conferences, or

(06:38):
school events provide a valuablechance to meet parents
face-to-face.
Even if a parent hasn’t beenresponsive through digital
channels, they may feel morecomfortable approaching you in
person at these events.
Make yourself approachable bygreeting parents with a warm
smile and introducingyourself—sometimes these simple
interactions open the door formore communication down the

(07:01):
road.
The key here is persistence andflexibility.
When we’re willing to trydifferent methods, it increases
the likelihood that one of thosemethods will work.
And when parents do respond,even if it’s brief, acknowledge
it positively.
Let them know you appreciatetheir time and are grateful for
the connection.""Once you’veestablished contact, it’s

(07:25):
essential to set up a system forongoing communication that works
for both you and the parent.
Let’s explore ways to createsustainable communication.""Once
you’ve managed to make contactwith an unresponsive parent,
it’s essential to work togetherto establish a sustainable
method of communication.

(07:45):
If the parent does respond, askthem directly about the best way
to stay in touch.
Something as simple as,‘Is therea communication method that
works best for you?’ can makethem feel respected and give you
insight into what will beeffective moving forward.
For elementary parents, a weeklyor bi-weekly update on their

(08:06):
child’s progress can bevaluable.
You could suggest sending abrief message at the end of each
week or a monthly summary.
Let them know it doesn’t need tobe a lengthy response—even a
quick‘got it’ from the parentcan be enough to know they’re
engaged.
Middle school parents oftenbenefit from fewer, more
targeted updates.

(08:28):
Many middle school students aredeveloping independence, and
parents may feel it’sappropriate to step back.
In this case, you could suggestchecking in at the end of each
grading period or after specificmilestones, like major projects
or tests.
For high school, encourageparents to check online grade
portals if available, and focuson major updates, like overall

(08:52):
grades or critical behavioralfeedback.
High school students are takingon more responsibility, and
parents sometimes prefer ahands-off approach.
Be transparent with them—letthem know you’ll reach out if
there’s a significant issue butalso encourage them to reach out
whenever they have questions orconcerns.
Consistency is the key here.

(09:15):
Setting a regular schedule forupdates, even if brief, lets
parents know they’re part oftheir child’s educational
experience without overwhelmingthem.
And if you’re using acommunication app, remind
parents how easy it is to checkin by replying to a
message—sometimes a gentlereminder makes all the
difference.""While consistentcommunication is the goal, there

(09:38):
are times when, despite our bestefforts, a parent remains
unresponsive.
Let’s discuss what to do inthose cases.""Unfortunately,
there are times when, despiteevery effort, a parent remains
unresponsive.
This can be challenging,especially when you know a
student would benefit from moreparental involvement.

(10:01):
In these cases, it’s essentialto focus on what you can control
and continue to advocate for thestudent in other ways.
One way to maintainaccountability is by documenting
your communication efforts.
Keep a record of every attemptto contact the parent, whether
it’s emails, phone calls, ornotes sent home.

(10:21):
Documenting each outreach effortis not only a good practice for
you but also helpful if you everneed to involve a counselor,
administrator, or social worker.
In some situations, schools mayeven have family liaisons or
community outreach staff who canhelp bridge the gap.
Shift your focus towardresources and strategies within

(10:42):
the school that can support thestudent.
Connect with school counselors,advisors, or after-school
programs that offer academic orsocial support.
When we can’t engage a parent,involving other professionals
can help address the student’sneeds.
Finally, focus on fostering asupportive and understanding

(11:02):
environment within theclassroom.
Often, students with lowparental engagement can feel
isolated or disconnected.
By building a strongrelationship with the student
and providing the structure,support, and encouragement they
need, you can make a significantdifference.
Let the student know you’rethere to help them succeed,

(11:23):
regardless of outsidecircumstances.""We’ve covered
strategies for reachingunresponsive parents.
Now let’s turn to our bonussegment, where we’ll answer a
question that comes upfrequently from parents: What
can I do if I feel disconnectedfrom my child’s teacher?"

(11:45):
"Parents sometimes ask, Whatshould I do if I feel
disconnected from my child’steacher?
This is a common concern,especially if there’s been a
long break in communication orif you’re unsure how to approach
the teacher about certainissues.
My first suggestion is to startwith a simple email or message
expressing your desire to stayinformed.

(12:08):
Something as straightforward as,‘Hi, I’d love to be more
connected to what’s happening inJames' classroom.
Is there a way I can stayupdated or check in regularly?’
This shows the teacher you’reinterested in being involved and
opens the door for consistentcommunication.
If the teacher doesn’t useregular updates, consider asking

(12:30):
if there’s a classroomnewsletter or parent group where
you can get information.
Many teachers rely on thesetools to communicate about
classroom activities andupcoming events.
And don’t hesitate to reach outfor a quick chat if there’s

something specific on your mind: teachers appreciate when parents (12:44):
undefined
take the initiative to stayengaged.
Remember, teachers want to buildrelationships with parents, so
don’t feel like you’re botheringthem.
Taking that first step is oftenthe best way to bridge the gap
and build a strongerconnection." Now, lets look at

(13:06):
your takeaways from todaysepisode.
"Reaching an unresponsive parentcan be a real challenge, but
it’s one worth facing.
When we try differentapproaches, remain flexible, and
keep the student at the centerof our efforts, we can still
provide them with the supportthey need, even if direct
parental involvement is limited.

(13:27):
Thank you for tuning in to thisepisode of Teaching with Valor.
For more resources on engagingparents and navigating
communication challenges, checkout the links in our episode
description.
Remember, every effort toconnect: even if it doesn’t

yield a response (13:43):
is a step toward supporting your students.
Keep reaching out, keep growing,and as always, keep teaching
with valor."