November 6, 2023 • 21 mins
This is THE episode!! If you want to have a massively transformational 2024 then YOU NEED TO HEAR THIS!
If you are tired of your current routine, need a change, if you are tired of setting the same goals and same New Year's Resolution over and over -- this episode will give you the cheat code.
Did you know?
- 23% of people quit their resolution for the new year by the end of the first week
- 43% of people quit by the end of January
- Only 9% of people claim to stick to their resolutions all year!
The most common things people promise themselves in the New Year?
- Exercise more
- Eat healthier
- Lose weight
- Save more money
- Spend more time with loved ones
- Spend less time on social media
- Reduce stress at work
- Reduce living expenses
Sound familiar? Have another goal in mind?
Let's turn those resolutions and promises to yourself into reality. This episode is all about how to start doing what it takes to embrace a new and more aligned version of YOU, and quit falling for "the fallacy of tomorrow".
Spoiler here... this is all about giving yourself power and autonomy in the RIGHT NOW!!
------------------------------
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
How can you actually align yourself with the thing
that you want so that if theworld presented it to you
tomorrow, that if it just fellright into your lap, that you
would be ready to receive it?
That's exactly it.
That's the name of the gameGetting ready, creating and
curating a reality that, if thisthing were just to be hand
delivered to you, you'd be ready.
(00:23):
Great, perfect, hello, my loves, and welcome to the Purposeful
Lifestyle Development Podcast,where we discuss all things
thought, work and manifestationbut we use neuroscience and the
study of the brain to do so.
I'm your host, tessa Spizak.
I'm a board certifiedpractitioner, master life and
(00:45):
health coach and seasonedexecutive speaker.
If you're ready to create yourhighest value lifestyle and turn
your dream life into a reality,you're in the right place.
Let's get right into today'sepisode.
Hello, hello, my loves, andwelcome into this week's episode
of the Purposeful LifestyleDevelopment Podcast.
For those of you who tune inevery week, thank you so much
(01:07):
for spending your time with mehere.
It means the world to me tohave this conversation with you
all, and if you're new here,welcome in.
Don't forget to hit subscribeso that you're able to stick
around and be part of thisconversation and with that y'all
we are officially in November.
I mean, where has this year gone?
I feel like it has bothabsolutely flown by, but also
(01:32):
this time last year feels like alifetime ago.
I think for me personally thishas been a really transformative
year and I've had theopportunity and the blessing
honestly to really tap into somenew and developing or changing
parts of myself.
I mean I used this summer toreally get centered and grounded
(01:53):
again in my goals and in myaspirations and in my creativity
, which really was a hugeblessing.
And I mean these last few yearsfor me have been such a change.
I went from a busy, all overthe place girl in her 20s living
in the city scheduling my lifearound meetings, to a full-time
(02:14):
life coach and wellness speaker,working from home in the
suburbs in the hills, with ahusband and a stepson who has
football practice and homeworkto schedule.
I mean I have a garden to tendto and we have a travel schedule
and it's a completely wonderfuland welcome change.
Don't get me wrong.
I mean I got all the thingsthat were on my buy 30 vision
(02:36):
board, but to say it was in awhirlwind yeah, it happened fast
and it happened all through thepandemic and all of that, and I
think that it's just somethingthat we're all going through as
a collective in some shape orform.
Just over the last year or two,or again we can even say post
(02:57):
2020 where there was thiscreation of a new normal for a
lot of people Even talking aboutthings like more people working
from home or leaving atraditional work environment,
maybe taking moreentrepreneurial roles, or even
just the ever-changing financialand housing world A lot of
people have moved and just avariable of different things.
(03:20):
One thing I'm hearing from alot of people in so many
different ways, essentially iswanting to ease or settle into a
new version of normal that isjust more in line with what they
actually want A new normal ornew reality that is more aligned
, and I feel like this iswidespread.
(03:42):
The people I talk to are allover the world.
This isn't just in one placethat I feel like.
People are just essentiallythrowing their hands up and
saying, okay, enough is enough.
I just want to clear out andget rid of all the crap I picked
up along the way, whether it'shabits that don't serve me or
don't serve me anymore, or I'vefallen into a routine that
doesn't feel good, or I maybestop doing a lot of the things
(04:06):
that do make me feel my best,and I'm done with it.
I want to get that back, orstop this new thing that I keep
finding myself doing, or I can'tseem to find a rhythm, and I'm
done with it.
It's time.
And if you feel that way too,if this is you, if that
resonates or feel familiar, thenI'm so glad you're listening
(04:26):
today, because that's exactlywhat I want to talk about, and I
think one trap that we all fallinto when we're trying to make
a big change or do somethingdifferent is that it's something
that I like to consider thefallacy of tomorrow.
And now, I'm sure there's anactual name for this phenomena
and I tried to find it for thisepisode, but I couldn't.
(04:48):
But it's this funny littlething that our brain likes to do
, where it gives so much creditand so much optimism to some
version of future.
You, whether maybe that'stomorrow like I'll do this
tomorrow, I'll be bettertomorrow.
Maybe this is you on Monday.
I mean, how many of my I'llstart Monday?
(05:10):
People are listening right now,or maybe around this time of
year, what we see, a lot is okay.
This is my New Year'sresolution In 2024, 2024, me,
this is what I'm going to bedoing.
And in this phenomena, where wegive so much credit and we're so
optimistic about that tomorrow,you, monday, you, january 1st,
(05:32):
you we tend to simultaneouslydiscredit the current you Like,
oh, I don't have energy for thatright now, but when Monday
comes, damn it, I'll be ready,or I'll have the energy and the
motivation then, whatever thatfuture then is, and then I'll be
perfect.
You know, maybe even somethinglike I know I can't follow my
(05:54):
current routine right now, butin the new year I'll be able to
follow an even harder, even morecomplex one.
How familiar does that sound?
You, me, everyone?
Yes, yes, because that's whathumans do.
And unfortunately, that's why,statistically, 80% of New Year's
(06:14):
resolutions fail by February.
That's why we keep tellingourselves over and over and over
, sometimes for years and years,that we have the same goal,
that we have the same New Year'sresolution.
Again, it's why people don't dothem, because they tend to not
stick, because we have thiscrazy idea that tomorrow us is
(06:34):
just an entirely new person,they're totally different from
today us.
Because today we don't giveourselves enough credit.
No, I don't feel good enoughda-da-da-da-da, any host of
excuses I can't do it today, buttomorrow, monday, next year,
totally I can do it.
And now is this to say that youcan't change your life
completely overnight?
(06:55):
Well, of course not.
You can, and many people do.
People stop bad habits calledturkey or just make the decision
that that's, that there's nogoing back.
But for the majority of people,and in the majority of cases,
that's just not the way it works.
There's too much engraved orintertwined in our subconscious
(07:15):
or in our habits or a day-to-daylife that we can trip up and
mess up, and sometimes evenwithout even realizing it until
after the fact.
And then you get thedisappointment.
Right, all the unhelpfulthoughts start creeping in that
tend to keep us even furtherfrom our goals.
Right, that little voice thatsays something like like oh,
(07:36):
look at that, mess up, that'sproof.
That's proof that you can't doit or that you're not determined
enough, or that you'll neverchange.
You don't have what it takes tochange Again sound familiar.
So how do we get around this?
How do we avoid this?
Let's take something like NewYear's resolutions.
That's what I'm going to usefor this conversation.
I think that's really, reallyimportant to have, especially
(07:59):
around this time of year.
Let's use that.
What about your New Year'sresolutions?
Whether you say you make themor not, I mean you know what I
mean when you look at that newyear, or heck again for my Wait
Till Monday, people, even ifyou're thinking about Monday and
the start of the new perfectweek, what do you see?
What are those aspirations?
And I mentioned this in thelast episode, but I really want
(08:22):
to drill it in today.
We don't want these to beincredibly general, especially
if you have a big goal or dreamor something like that on the
list.
Like, say, you really want torun a 10K, a 10K marathon next
year and that's your big goal,right.
But right now your current youis having a really hard time to
sticking to the workout routineyou have, the running routine
(08:45):
that you have.
I would highly suggest to youdon't just put or run a marathon
on the list, right.
Take a few extra minutes andget clear on what that means
specifically for you.
You'll need a new trainingschedule, maybe a coach,
probably some new shoes.
You'll have to plan on uppingyour daily water intake that
(09:08):
maybe you've been slacking on.
There's a lot that goes into it.
So, for someone who iscurrently, like in this example,
not great with their currentworkout routine or maybe isn't
focusing on water.
Does it make sense that they'llsuccessfully hit that New Year's
resolution to run a marathon?
Probably not.
But what if?
(09:29):
What if they now, in November,even before that energy of the
New Year that we're all relyingon comes about?
What if we started gettingeverything ready?
We just looked at it that way,though.
We're getting it ready.
What if, in November, they wentand tried to get the right
shoes and talked to a fewcoaches, started gathering a
(09:52):
little list of notes?
What if they joined a fewgroups, maybe on social media or
in their local area, of peoplein their community that are
training for the same thing?
Maybe they got excited scopingout some new parks that they can
run at, or they started gettingexcited about new training
routines, started really lookinginto that.
(10:12):
When the New Year comes alongand then they declare this
resolution, which person do youthink would be more successful?
The person who was putting itoff, waiting?
You know what, in the New Year,in 2024, I'm going to run a
marathon period.
Or the person that spent thoseeight weeks, six weeks, whatever
(10:33):
it is some period of time doingall the back end work, getting
ready, creating that law ofattraction for the goodness to
come in.
Or here are some other popularones.
Our most popular New Year'sresolutions were reported for
this last year, for 2023.
Here's what they are we haveexercise more kind of in line
(10:54):
with that example there I thinkthat's why I thought of it.
We have eat healthier and inthat same vein, there's lose
weight.
So all kind of focused onhealth there.
Next was save money, then therewas spend more time with
friends.
Closely behind that was spendless time on social media.
There was reduce stress at work, followed actually no tide with
(11:17):
reduce living expenses.
So those are the most commonresolutions, at least for this
year, for 2023, basicallyfocusing on physical health, our
social health and our financialhealth.
So my question is what can we doabout it now, here at the
beginning of November?
How can we give January 1st usthe best chance at succeeding?
(11:41):
Because here's more statisticsfor you 23% of people report
quitting their resolution by theend of the first week.
That's almost a quarter ofpeople who set out a goal for
themselves.
Don't make it to the end of thefirst week.
43% almost half of the peoplewho set out with a goal or a
(12:02):
resolution at the beginning ofthe year, they're done by the
end of January and statisticallythis is what kills me as
someone who helps people settheir goals and keep their goals
right Only 9% of people claimto have stuck to their New
Year's resolution all year.
So if we don't want to be inthat just about a quarter
(12:26):
percent of everyone who sets agoal quitting by that first week
and we don't want to be in thealmost half that quit within a
month and we do want to getourselves into that 9% or maybe
we're on my mission how do wemake that 9% go way way up?
I say start now, do the back endwork, get a plan in place,
(12:50):
figure out what changes in yourcurrent reality, your current
day to day, that you would needto change to bring your goals
into your reality successfully.
And we know there are thingsthat need to change.
I'm not saying this to be harsh, but it's the fact, because if
there wasn't things that need tochange now, then there wouldn't
be a resolution, there wouldn'tbe something that you wanted
(13:10):
because you already would haveit.
So how do we make getting it orachieving it easier?
How do we make that more likely?
How do we bring this closer toour reality?
What schedules can you put intoplace?
What habits can you startcurating and turning into habits
right now From there?
Where do we start seeing habitstacks?
(13:31):
Where can we again make iteasier?
What if just hear me out here,stick with me what if you just
shifted your mindset a littlebit, tap into a little bit of
the reward system in the brain?
And what if you just think ofthese next two months, the last
part of this year, as aspringboard or even as a cheat
code to getting exactly what youwant in the next year, whatever
(13:55):
it is, whether it's changing orimproving your health, if it's
working on your relationship,saving money, changing jobs.
I talked a lot about this inone of my way earlier episodes,
but it is still one of my mostregularly downloaded,
re-listened to.
Responded to the episode of thescience of manifestation.
How can you actually alignyourself with the thing that you
(14:18):
want so that if the worldpresented it to you tomorrow,
that if it just fell right intoyour lap, that you would be
ready to receive it?
That's exactly it.
That's the name of the gameGetting ready, creating and
curating a reality that if thisthing were just to be hand
delivered to you, you'd be ready, great, perfect.
We're ready to go.
(14:38):
You have to be able to seeyourself as doing and being and
thinking in line with that thingthat you want you have to be.
It has to be familiar to yourbrain so that your brain doesn't
freak out and think like danger, danger, and give you every
excuse or every reason in thebook to not go after it, to not
(14:59):
take action or not to move in away that actually moves the
needle in your life.
If you think in 2024, that youare going to be dedicating an
hour of your day, every singleday, to something like every day
you're going to work out ormeal prep or work on your
passions or whatever it is, butyou haven't created a system to
(15:19):
allow for it or you haven't eventried it yet.
We're just putting it off.
And putting it off and waitingto the new year or waiting until
it feels just right quoteunquote or pushing it off until
Monday again, right?
What if we stopped with thatidea that the future you has
some qualities that you don'thave and that this future you
(15:40):
isn't subject to the humanexperience of bad days, sleepy
days, distracted days, and justgave a little bit more credit to
the you that is you right nowand you allowed yourself the
space and the vulnerability inthe room to grow in that way and
to try and maybe fail and tryanother way.
What if we went into the newyear with two months or six
(16:03):
weeks or whatever the case maybe all this time behind us that
we spent practicing and workingon aligning and two months of
working towards creating somesort of consistency towards the
things that we want, rather thanjust putting all of this
pressure on this future versionof you to somehow have it all
(16:24):
figured out and have thisroutine that you haven't even
tried yet, and to have thisdetermination that you have a
hard time finding today right?
What if you started embodyingyour new year's resolutions
right now?
Mentally?
It can do this little flip inthe brain that gives you the
room to try and the room to failand the room to deviate and try
(16:48):
it in a new way and try newthings and be able to try it
right, because now we're justlooking at it as behind the
scenes work, because this isn'teven the new year yet and this
is our new year's resolution.
What if we could shape it thatway?
And the cool thing about it istoo that's where the real change
happens.
Not only are we activelyworking on what we want, which
(17:11):
is fantastic in the goal, reallywithin itself, but we're
actively creating those newneural pathways in the brain.
That makes it easier, we'redoing the work to get our brains
on our sides.
Again, our brain is alwaystrying to get us to do things
that it is familiar with, thatit understands, even if that
means keeping us stuck, keepingin our comfort zone, because
(17:35):
it's what it knows.
When we're doing something newand we're doing something
different and our brain isn'tfamiliar with this concept, idea
, habit, whatever, it's going toyell danger, danger.
I don't know what this is, Idon't know what the outcome is
and we're going to get everysingle thought as to push you
away from it.
So instead, we're creatingthese new neural networks, we're
(17:56):
creating that familiarity andwe're starting that reward cycle
to where, when we go after thething that, again, our brain is
familiar with and it likes, andwe do it and we're successful
here's a little bit of dopamineand serotonin go do it again and
the cycle continues.
So if you do it now.
Here's what I can promiseYou'll have a better chance of
(18:17):
seeing your wins as actual winsand not just taking them for
granted, as you would maybe onJanuary 1st, where that
resolution has already started,where when you have a successful
day you're not really givingyourself that mental pat on the
back because it's well, this wasmy baseline.
But if you're looking at it asdoing this work behind the
(18:40):
scenes, maybe early pre-work,then it's a lot easier to notice
when we get it right.
It's oh, look at me right, verynice, look at me pat on the
back right, rather than justonly being able to see the
failure when it's not perfect.
If we start it now, before the,I guess you could call like
(19:01):
action set or like start date ofthis resolution, you won't see
the quote unquote failures orsetbacks or, more appropriately,
we'll just call them learningcurves.
We won't see them as failing,because it's something that
you're learning ahead of time,before your commitment started
in the new year.
Or again, replace with Monday,whatever the case.
(19:22):
And not only that, you'reteaching your brain that you are
able to be flexible.
You're showing your brain thatyou can change how you please
and that it is safe to haveautonomy over yourself and over
your decisions.
So, as a community, let's dothis.
Let's think about our NewYear's resolutions that I know
(19:42):
you set, whether you admit it ornot.
Get them out in front of you.
Get specific about not onlywhat the goal is, but what that
means for you and your schedule,and all the little tweaks and
changes that you're going toneed to make.
And what if we start embodyingthose traits and those changes
right now, even just smalllittle things?
Try it on for size.
(20:04):
Give that power back to the nowyou and stop punishing future
you by having this belief thatsomehow they're going to have
all this power that you didn'tspend the time cultivating today
, that you haven't found yettoday.
Don't punish future.
You like that.
Start working on it behind thescenes.
(20:24):
This is your reminder.
You don't need a perfect day, aperfect week, a perfect month,
perfect year even, and you don'thave to feel perfect all the
time to just get started.
But what you do need is to stopletting that version of you
that you want to be lived lockedaway and your fantasies and
(20:46):
your goal setting about tomorrow, let it live today in your
today reality.
You are deserving of all thethings you want for yourself.
You absolutely are able to livein that potential that you want
and please, please, let me knowwhat you are committing to for
your highest you and, if thishelps, please let me know with a
(21:07):
positive comment or review.
Not only is it such an honor tobe on this journey with you,
but it also helps boost up thisconversations to other who could
benefit from joining ourcommunity.
But I send all of my love toeach and every one of you.
Have an amazing week and Icannot wait to hear.
Please, let me know what youare starting today for this new
(21:30):
year, you.
But all right, my loves, that'swhere I'll leave us today.
I want to thank you so much forjoining in on this conversation
with me, and each week, everyMonday, we're going to be
posting a new episode, going alittle bit deeper into the
conversation, of what you can doto train your brain on purpose
to really allow for thelifestyle that you want to live.
(21:51):
Until next time, my loves.
In the meantime, here's to yourhealth and your happiness.
How can you actually align yourself with the thing
that you want so that if theworld presented it to you
tomorrow, that if it just fellright into your lap, that you
would be ready to receive it?
That's exactly it.
That's the name of the gameGetting ready, creating and
curating a reality that, if thisthing were just to be hand
delivered to you, you'd be ready.
(00:23):
Great, perfect, hello, my loves, and welcome to the Purposeful
Lifestyle Development Podcast,where we discuss all things
thought, work and manifestationbut we use neuroscience and the
study of the brain to do so.
I'm your host, tessa Spizak.
I'm a board certifiedpractitioner, master life and
(00:45):
health coach and seasonedexecutive speaker.
If you're ready to create yourhighest value lifestyle and turn
your dream life into a reality,you're in the right place.
Let's get right into today'sepisode.
Hello, hello, my loves, andwelcome into this week's episode
of the Purposeful LifestyleDevelopment Podcast.
For those of you who tune inevery week, thank you so much
(01:07):
for spending your time with mehere.
It means the world to me tohave this conversation with you
all, and if you're new here,welcome in.
Don't forget to hit subscribeso that you're able to stick
around and be part of thisconversation and with that y'all
we are officially in November.
I mean, where has this year gone?
I feel like it has bothabsolutely flown by, but also
(01:32):
this time last year feels like alifetime ago.
I think for me personally thishas been a really transformative
year and I've had theopportunity and the blessing
honestly to really tap into somenew and developing or changing
parts of myself.
I mean I used this summer toreally get centered and grounded
(01:53):
again in my goals and in myaspirations and in my creativity
, which really was a hugeblessing.
And I mean these last few yearsfor me have been such a change.
I went from a busy, all overthe place girl in her 20s living
in the city scheduling my lifearound meetings, to a full-time
(02:14):
life coach and wellness speaker,working from home in the
suburbs in the hills, with ahusband and a stepson who has
football practice and homeworkto schedule.
I mean I have a garden to tendto and we have a travel schedule
and it's a completely wonderfuland welcome change.
Don't get me wrong.
I mean I got all the thingsthat were on my buy 30 vision
(02:36):
board, but to say it was in awhirlwind yeah, it happened fast
and it happened all through thepandemic and all of that, and I
think that it's just somethingthat we're all going through as
a collective in some shape orform.
Just over the last year or two,or again we can even say post
(02:57):
2020 where there was thiscreation of a new normal for a
lot of people Even talking aboutthings like more people working
from home or leaving atraditional work environment,
maybe taking moreentrepreneurial roles, or even
just the ever-changing financialand housing world A lot of
people have moved and just avariable of different things.
(03:20):
One thing I'm hearing from alot of people in so many
different ways, essentially iswanting to ease or settle into a
new version of normal that isjust more in line with what they
actually want A new normal ornew reality that is more aligned
, and I feel like this iswidespread.
(03:42):
The people I talk to are allover the world.
This isn't just in one placethat I feel like.
People are just essentiallythrowing their hands up and
saying, okay, enough is enough.
I just want to clear out andget rid of all the crap I picked
up along the way, whether it'shabits that don't serve me or
don't serve me anymore, or I'vefallen into a routine that
doesn't feel good, or I maybestop doing a lot of the things
(04:06):
that do make me feel my best,and I'm done with it.
I want to get that back, orstop this new thing that I keep
finding myself doing, or I can'tseem to find a rhythm, and I'm
done with it.
It's time.
And if you feel that way too,if this is you, if that
resonates or feel familiar, thenI'm so glad you're listening
(04:26):
today, because that's exactlywhat I want to talk about, and I
think one trap that we all fallinto when we're trying to make
a big change or do somethingdifferent is that it's something
that I like to consider thefallacy of tomorrow.
And now, I'm sure there's anactual name for this phenomena
and I tried to find it for thisepisode, but I couldn't.
(04:48):
But it's this funny littlething that our brain likes to do
, where it gives so much creditand so much optimism to some
version of future.
You, whether maybe that'stomorrow like I'll do this
tomorrow, I'll be bettertomorrow.
Maybe this is you on Monday.
I mean, how many of my I'llstart Monday?
(05:10):
People are listening right now,or maybe around this time of
year, what we see, a lot is okay.
This is my New Year'sresolution In 2024, 2024, me,
this is what I'm going to bedoing.
And in this phenomena, where wegive so much credit and we're so
optimistic about that tomorrow,you, monday, you, january 1st,
(05:32):
you we tend to simultaneouslydiscredit the current you Like,
oh, I don't have energy for thatright now, but when Monday
comes, damn it, I'll be ready,or I'll have the energy and the
motivation then, whatever thatfuture then is, and then I'll be
perfect.
You know, maybe even somethinglike I know I can't follow my
(05:54):
current routine right now, butin the new year I'll be able to
follow an even harder, even morecomplex one.
How familiar does that sound?
You, me, everyone?
Yes, yes, because that's whathumans do.
And unfortunately, that's why,statistically, 80% of New Year's
(06:14):
resolutions fail by February.
That's why we keep tellingourselves over and over and over
, sometimes for years and years,that we have the same goal,
that we have the same New Year'sresolution.
Again, it's why people don't dothem, because they tend to not
stick, because we have thiscrazy idea that tomorrow us is
(06:34):
just an entirely new person,they're totally different from
today us.
Because today we don't giveourselves enough credit.
No, I don't feel good enoughda-da-da-da-da, any host of
excuses I can't do it today, buttomorrow, monday, next year,
totally I can do it.
And now is this to say that youcan't change your life
completely overnight?
(06:55):
Well, of course not.
You can, and many people do.
People stop bad habits calledturkey or just make the decision
that that's, that there's nogoing back.
But for the majority of people,and in the majority of cases,
that's just not the way it works.
There's too much engraved orintertwined in our subconscious
(07:15):
or in our habits or a day-to-daylife that we can trip up and
mess up, and sometimes evenwithout even realizing it until
after the fact.
And then you get thedisappointment.
Right, all the unhelpfulthoughts start creeping in that
tend to keep us even furtherfrom our goals.
Right, that little voice thatsays something like like oh,
(07:36):
look at that, mess up, that'sproof.
That's proof that you can't doit or that you're not determined
enough, or that you'll neverchange.
You don't have what it takes tochange Again sound familiar.
So how do we get around this?
How do we avoid this?
Let's take something like NewYear's resolutions.
That's what I'm going to usefor this conversation.
I think that's really, reallyimportant to have, especially
(07:59):
around this time of year.
Let's use that.
What about your New Year'sresolutions?
Whether you say you make themor not, I mean you know what I
mean when you look at that newyear, or heck again for my Wait
Till Monday, people, even ifyou're thinking about Monday and
the start of the new perfectweek, what do you see?
What are those aspirations?
And I mentioned this in thelast episode, but I really want
(08:22):
to drill it in today.
We don't want these to beincredibly general, especially
if you have a big goal or dreamor something like that on the
list.
Like, say, you really want torun a 10K, a 10K marathon next
year and that's your big goal,right.
But right now your current youis having a really hard time to
sticking to the workout routineyou have, the running routine
(08:45):
that you have.
I would highly suggest to youdon't just put or run a marathon
on the list, right.
Take a few extra minutes andget clear on what that means
specifically for you.
You'll need a new trainingschedule, maybe a coach,
probably some new shoes.
You'll have to plan on uppingyour daily water intake that
(09:08):
maybe you've been slacking on.
There's a lot that goes into it.
So, for someone who iscurrently, like in this example,
not great with their currentworkout routine or maybe isn't
focusing on water.
Does it make sense that they'llsuccessfully hit that New Year's
resolution to run a marathon?
Probably not.
But what if?
(09:29):
What if they now, in November,even before that energy of the
New Year that we're all relyingon comes about?
What if we started gettingeverything ready?
We just looked at it that way,though.
We're getting it ready.
What if, in November, they wentand tried to get the right
shoes and talked to a fewcoaches, started gathering a
(09:52):
little list of notes?
What if they joined a fewgroups, maybe on social media or
in their local area, of peoplein their community that are
training for the same thing?
Maybe they got excited scopingout some new parks that they can
run at, or they started gettingexcited about new training
routines, started really lookinginto that.
(10:12):
When the New Year comes alongand then they declare this
resolution, which person do youthink would be more successful?
The person who was putting itoff, waiting?
You know what, in the New Year,in 2024, I'm going to run a
marathon period.
Or the person that spent thoseeight weeks, six weeks, whatever
(10:33):
it is some period of time doingall the back end work, getting
ready, creating that law ofattraction for the goodness to
come in.
Or here are some other popularones.
Our most popular New Year'sresolutions were reported for
this last year, for 2023.
Here's what they are we haveexercise more kind of in line
(10:54):
with that example there I thinkthat's why I thought of it.
We have eat healthier and inthat same vein, there's lose
weight.
So all kind of focused onhealth there.
Next was save money, then therewas spend more time with
friends.
Closely behind that was spendless time on social media.
There was reduce stress at work, followed actually no tide with
(11:17):
reduce living expenses.
So those are the most commonresolutions, at least for this
year, for 2023, basicallyfocusing on physical health, our
social health and our financialhealth.
So my question is what can we doabout it now, here at the
beginning of November?
How can we give January 1st usthe best chance at succeeding?
(11:41):
Because here's more statisticsfor you 23% of people report
quitting their resolution by theend of the first week.
That's almost a quarter ofpeople who set out a goal for
themselves.
Don't make it to the end of thefirst week.
43% almost half of the peoplewho set out with a goal or a
(12:02):
resolution at the beginning ofthe year, they're done by the
end of January and statisticallythis is what kills me as
someone who helps people settheir goals and keep their goals
right Only 9% of people claimto have stuck to their New
Year's resolution all year.
So if we don't want to be inthat just about a quarter
(12:26):
percent of everyone who sets agoal quitting by that first week
and we don't want to be in thealmost half that quit within a
month and we do want to getourselves into that 9% or maybe
we're on my mission how do wemake that 9% go way way up?
I say start now, do the back endwork, get a plan in place,
(12:50):
figure out what changes in yourcurrent reality, your current
day to day, that you would needto change to bring your goals
into your reality successfully.
And we know there are thingsthat need to change.
I'm not saying this to be harsh, but it's the fact, because if
there wasn't things that need tochange now, then there wouldn't
be a resolution, there wouldn'tbe something that you wanted
(13:10):
because you already would haveit.
So how do we make getting it orachieving it easier?
How do we make that more likely?
How do we bring this closer toour reality?
What schedules can you put intoplace?
What habits can you startcurating and turning into habits
right now From there?
Where do we start seeing habitstacks?
(13:31):
Where can we again make iteasier?
What if just hear me out here,stick with me what if you just
shifted your mindset a littlebit, tap into a little bit of
the reward system in the brain?
And what if you just think ofthese next two months, the last
part of this year, as aspringboard or even as a cheat
code to getting exactly what youwant in the next year, whatever
(13:55):
it is, whether it's changing orimproving your health, if it's
working on your relationship,saving money, changing jobs.
I talked a lot about this inone of my way earlier episodes,
but it is still one of my mostregularly downloaded,
re-listened to.
Responded to the episode of thescience of manifestation.
How can you actually alignyourself with the thing that you
(14:18):
want so that if the worldpresented it to you tomorrow,
that if it just fell right intoyour lap, that you would be
ready to receive it?
That's exactly it.
That's the name of the gameGetting ready, creating and
curating a reality that if thisthing were just to be hand
delivered to you, you'd be ready, great, perfect.
We're ready to go.
(14:38):
You have to be able to seeyourself as doing and being and
thinking in line with that thingthat you want you have to be.
It has to be familiar to yourbrain so that your brain doesn't
freak out and think like danger, danger, and give you every
excuse or every reason in thebook to not go after it, to not
(14:59):
take action or not to move in away that actually moves the
needle in your life.
If you think in 2024, that youare going to be dedicating an
hour of your day, every singleday, to something like every day
you're going to work out ormeal prep or work on your
passions or whatever it is, butyou haven't created a system to
(15:19):
allow for it or you haven't eventried it yet.
We're just putting it off.
And putting it off and waitingto the new year or waiting until
it feels just right quoteunquote or pushing it off until
Monday again, right?
What if we stopped with thatidea that the future you has
some qualities that you don'thave and that this future you
(15:40):
isn't subject to the humanexperience of bad days, sleepy
days, distracted days, and justgave a little bit more credit to
the you that is you right nowand you allowed yourself the
space and the vulnerability inthe room to grow in that way and
to try and maybe fail and tryanother way.
What if we went into the newyear with two months or six
(16:03):
weeks or whatever the case maybe all this time behind us that
we spent practicing and workingon aligning and two months of
working towards creating somesort of consistency towards the
things that we want, rather thanjust putting all of this
pressure on this future versionof you to somehow have it all
(16:24):
figured out and have thisroutine that you haven't even
tried yet, and to have thisdetermination that you have a
hard time finding today right?
What if you started embodyingyour new year's resolutions
right now?
Mentally?
It can do this little flip inthe brain that gives you the
room to try and the room to failand the room to deviate and try
(16:48):
it in a new way and try newthings and be able to try it
right, because now we're justlooking at it as behind the
scenes work, because this isn'teven the new year yet and this
is our new year's resolution.
What if we could shape it thatway?
And the cool thing about it istoo that's where the real change
happens.
Not only are we activelyworking on what we want, which
(17:11):
is fantastic in the goal, reallywithin itself, but we're
actively creating those newneural pathways in the brain.
That makes it easier, we'redoing the work to get our brains
on our sides.
Again, our brain is alwaystrying to get us to do things
that it is familiar with, thatit understands, even if that
means keeping us stuck, keepingin our comfort zone, because
(17:35):
it's what it knows.
When we're doing something newand we're doing something
different and our brain isn'tfamiliar with this concept, idea
, habit, whatever, it's going toyell danger, danger.
I don't know what this is, Idon't know what the outcome is
and we're going to get everysingle thought as to push you
away from it.
So instead, we're creatingthese new neural networks, we're
(17:56):
creating that familiarity andwe're starting that reward cycle
to where, when we go after thething that, again, our brain is
familiar with and it likes, andwe do it and we're successful
here's a little bit of dopamineand serotonin go do it again and
the cycle continues.
So if you do it now.
Here's what I can promiseYou'll have a better chance of
(18:17):
seeing your wins as actual winsand not just taking them for
granted, as you would maybe onJanuary 1st, where that
resolution has already started,where when you have a successful
day you're not really givingyourself that mental pat on the
back because it's well, this wasmy baseline.
But if you're looking at it asdoing this work behind the
(18:40):
scenes, maybe early pre-work,then it's a lot easier to notice
when we get it right.
It's oh, look at me right, verynice, look at me pat on the
back right, rather than justonly being able to see the
failure when it's not perfect.
If we start it now, before the,I guess you could call like
(19:01):
action set or like start date ofthis resolution, you won't see
the quote unquote failures orsetbacks or, more appropriately,
we'll just call them learningcurves.
We won't see them as failing,because it's something that
you're learning ahead of time,before your commitment started
in the new year.
Or again, replace with Monday,whatever the case.
(19:22):
And not only that, you'reteaching your brain that you are
able to be flexible.
You're showing your brain thatyou can change how you please
and that it is safe to haveautonomy over yourself and over
your decisions.
So, as a community, let's dothis.
Let's think about our NewYear's resolutions that I know
(19:42):
you set, whether you admit it ornot.
Get them out in front of you.
Get specific about not onlywhat the goal is, but what that
means for you and your schedule,and all the little tweaks and
changes that you're going toneed to make.
And what if we start embodyingthose traits and those changes
right now, even just smalllittle things?
Try it on for size.
(20:04):
Give that power back to the nowyou and stop punishing future
you by having this belief thatsomehow they're going to have
all this power that you didn'tspend the time cultivating today
, that you haven't found yettoday.
Don't punish future.
You like that.
Start working on it behind thescenes.
(20:24):
This is your reminder.
You don't need a perfect day, aperfect week, a perfect month,
perfect year even, and you don'thave to feel perfect all the
time to just get started.
But what you do need is to stopletting that version of you
that you want to be lived lockedaway and your fantasies and
(20:46):
your goal setting about tomorrow, let it live today in your
today reality.
You are deserving of all thethings you want for yourself.
You absolutely are able to livein that potential that you want
and please, please, let me knowwhat you are committing to for
your highest you and, if thishelps, please let me know with a
(21:07):
positive comment or review.
Not only is it such an honor tobe on this journey with you,
but it also helps boost up thisconversations to other who could
benefit from joining ourcommunity.
But I send all of my love toeach and every one of you.
Have an amazing week and Icannot wait to hear.
Please, let me know what youare starting today for this new
(21:30):
year, you.
But all right, my loves, that'swhere I'll leave us today.
I want to thank you so much forjoining in on this conversation
with me, and each week, everyMonday, we're going to be
posting a new episode, going alittle bit deeper into the
conversation, of what you can doto train your brain on purpose
to really allow for thelifestyle that you want to live.
(21:51):
Until next time, my loves.
In the meantime, here's to yourhealth and your happiness.
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