June 12, 2023 • 24 mins
What energy are you bringing into your daily life, and how does it affect your luck, success, and happiness?
In today's episode, Coach Tessa shares powerful insights on intentional energy alignment and how it can transform the way life shows up for YOU.
This conversation includes:
- The impact of choosing positive energy, as Tessa discusses her own experiences with excitement, relaxation, creativity, and playfulness.
- Learning how to create your own luck by getting curious and asking the question... "so just how good could this POSSIBLY get?".
- Taking Inventory: Are you simply going through the motions or showing up to life with intention and curiosity?
Tessa also discusses the pitfalls of relying on sheer determination and motivation, and explores brain training techniques for living your best life, while challenging you to consider just how you're REALLY showing up in your own life.
Don't miss this thought-provoking conversation that will help you tap into your full potential and live a more fulfilling, intentional life!
---
Click here for quick links!
Website for coaching info: www.PurposefulLifestyleDevelopment.com
Reach me: info@purposefullifestyledevelopment.com
Free Coaching in our Tiktok Community: https://www.tiktok.com/@coachtessa
Live: http://www.wellnesscoach.live/coaches/tessa-spisak
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/CoachtessaPLD
Up to $40 off your 1st Daily Harvest Purchase here! Use "CoachTessa" at Checkout
Shop DYI Clothing here! 20% Off Every Order With "CoachTessa" at Checkout
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
That's when you become aligned with the
possibilities that are out there, all the luck that's out there.
Aligned to the luck that youcan have, you unlock your
creativity and tap into yourresources so much better and are
able to take that inspiredactions towards your dreams
which causes your reality tofall in line with exactly that.
(00:22):
That's where you find luck andmotivation and determination and
resilience.
Hello, my loves, and welcome tothe Purposeful Lifestyle
Development Podcast, where wediscuss all things thought, work
and manifestation but we useneuroscience and the study of
the brain to do so.
I'm your host, tessa Spiesak.
(00:43):
I'm a board certifiedpractitioner, master life and
health coach and seasonedexecutive speaker.
If you are ready to create yourhighest value lifestyle and
turn your dream life into areality, you're in the right
place.
Let's get right in to today'sepisode.
Hello, hello, my loves, andwelcome back to the Purposeful
Lifestyle Development Podcast.
(01:04):
And if you're new, welcome in.
Don't forget to hit subscribeso that you never miss part of
our conversation.
If you haven't done so yet, i'dso appreciate it if you took a
second to leave a review onwhatever streaming service you
are listening on.
It helps boost the show so thatothers can join too.
But now that that's out of theway.
You may have noticed over thelast few weeks that the way I've
(01:27):
been structuring this podcast,so to speak, has been to give
you a theme or a topic to keepin mind over the week, just
another lovely little layer ofgoodness to give yourself
another practice that we canutilize to care for ourselves
even better, or a way to checkin, do some inventory with our
(01:47):
lives and make sure that we areliving present and in a way that
aligns with the lifestyle wedesire to live.
And this week I'm holding true,i'm doing the same.
I'm going to offer a thoughtthat I really suggest you hold
with you.
This is something that I keepin my head pretty much at all
times And even still, while I'mconsciously thinking about it, i
(02:12):
can still find myself notacting totally accordingly.
It does take some practice andsomething that you need to
actively keep, but it's totallyworth it.
But here's what I want you tohave from this conversation
today.
I want you to ask yourself whatenergy am I bringing to the
(02:32):
things I'm doing?
How am I showing up for and howam I showing up in my life
energetically?
And I want you to really,really think about it.
Get honest about it, not justhow you show up for work or how
you show up for the people thatdepend on you, but in a general
sense that covers everything youdo.
(02:53):
How are you energetically goinginto the things you do?
Think about it this way.
I want to walk you through it.
When I get quiet with myself andreally truly ask myself what
would my dream day look like?
Just my regular day In the lifeI live, if I could have a
(03:13):
perfect, regular Tuesday, not aspecial day, but just a regular
day, what would it look likeWhen I get serious and really
walk through the day in thatvisualization, what I envision
is me feeling literally amazingas I do everything.
When I see my ideal day, i'mreally excited to wake up you
(03:36):
know, up before my alarm clock,just ready to take on the day.
I'm relaxed and in tune with meduring my morning routine.
I'm not stressed about the dayor anything else.
I get to use that timeappropriately and for myself.
I'm not rushed.
I carefully and intentionallydo the things that I like that
(03:57):
are good for me, like myskincare.
I get some movement and I go inknowing that I will feel
amazing after I do a movement,and then I do feel amazing when
it's done.
Then, when I sit down to meetwith my clients, i'm so excited
and I'm pumped to hear what theyhave to say.
I'm ready to be proud of them.
(04:18):
I see myself having this bigburst of creativity and
excitedly making something newfor the people that I help.
I see myself feeling reallyplayful and going downstairs to
my husband's office and flirtingwith him and see myself being
really ready for some play, likesinging in the car.
In my perfect day I'm cookingfor my family and dancing to
(04:42):
music.
Like if I'm cooking Italianfood, i'm listening to Italian
cafe music and I'm in a lovelymood.
I see myself going to bedrelaxed, feeling happy with my
day and proud of myself andgrateful for everything that was
in the day and excited to do ittomorrow.
Now, if you look at that, yousee a consistent theme there.
(05:03):
It's all about the feeling.
It's all about, for me at least, how I energetically show up to
those things.
Just for the sake of comparison, in case it didn't fully click,
what I'm getting at picture thedifference between that ideal
day situation and what we'vebeen conditioned to do when we
(05:25):
aren't actively conscious on howand where our energy is flowing
Without having that intention.
You can picture this as in themorning, groaning through,
snoozing the alarm, thenshooting out of bed at the last
second, getting ready as fast asyou can.
The morning's frantic.
You end up dreading yourprojects that you're doing for
(05:47):
work, just dreading what you dofor work, stressed out because
we don't know what to do fordinner and then eating something
crappy that makes us feelcrappy because it was easy in
there.
Then we're annoyed with ourpartners because we don't want
to be touched.
Now, if you're not conscious,we know that story of life can
just be happening.
You're shooting your waythrough the moments and it
(06:08):
honestly just doesn't feel goodWhen you aren't in charge and
you aren't dictating where yourenergy goes and where you want
it to flow.
That ideal day that I described,or whatever version that you
would create, it's not going tohappen.
That flow, that space ofgratitude, that space that feels
abundant with bliss, that's notsomething that is reserved for
(06:33):
a lucky few who are lucky enoughto be in situations that allow
for it.
It's not a situational thing.
That's what most people think,but I'm telling you it's not the
case, because flow, gratitude,no-transcript That comes from
intention and it comes fromchoosing how you show up
(06:55):
energetically to all of thesethings.
And if you know me and you knowwhat I talk about in my
coaching and in my publicspeaking one of my pillars in
everything that I say when itcomes to the things you want to
do and want to accomplish youare doing yourself so much of a
disservice if you're quantifyingthe thing or the action or the
(07:17):
steps that it takes to do it orthe day that it causes to go
through it.
If you assume and classifythese things as they're going to
be hard or difficult or toomuch, before you even try,
you're going to make that true.
This is a hill I am willing todie on.
Don't choose for it to bedifficult or painful or
(07:37):
emotionally draining or whatever, and I know some people go
about this exactly in that wayand that's fine for them if it
works.
I get the idea in the theory.
Some people believe thatpreparing yourself for it to be
hard is something that will keepyou from quitting when it
inevitably does get difficult,because such is life right, it
(08:00):
will never be all the way easyall the time.
It's the human experience Andmy thought on that, honestly, is
, you wouldn't want it to besuper incredibly easy all the
time, because then we'd have nodesire for anything or any drive
in our souls.
And where would we find apurpose if there was no purpose?
because we never had to strivefor anything or persevere.
(08:22):
But sorry, that's a little bitof a tangent.
Anyway, my point is Iunderstand the concept of
preparing for the worst in caseit comes, and I'm sure that
makes sense on the surface, butwhen we understand how our
brains work, i'd say it'susually more in your favor to
work with your brain and how itfunctions.
(08:45):
Therefore, instead of telling itthat whatever you're showing up
for is going to be difficult orhard for you, that causes your
particular activating system tosay, ok, boss, i believe you,
and it starts to scan for allthe things that make that true.
It starts to scan for all thethings that can be perceived as
(09:07):
difficult, because we coveredthat one, my loves.
Your particular activatingsystem is like the filter for
your brain and it basicallyscans for whatever it's going to
alert you to.
There's so much stimuli allaround us all the time, for
every second, that it wouldliterally be maddening if we
picked up on every single thing.
So that's what our brain does,that particular activating
(09:29):
system.
It goes to work for us and,essentially, will let in the
stimuli or let in the proof ofwhatever we believe to be true.
It's always working,essentially to prove you right.
So if you say this thing that Ineed to do it's scary and it's
difficult and it's a hardsituation, ok, boss, that's what
(09:52):
it starts looking for.
I mean, this is the thing thatkept us alive as a species and
allowed us to become what we aretoday.
Because back in ourhunter-gatherer days, if you
were consciously aware that thesituation that you were in was
in fact scary, dangerous,difficult, then your brain goes
into hyperdrive trying to figureout how that can be true.
(10:13):
That's what keeps you safe.
It will literally scan theenvironment for a threat, even
in the background, even at thatsubconscious level.
If you knew there was some Idon't know tiger or bear
infested area, your brain wouldbe really sensitive to your
surroundings in search of thatthreat.
And we evolved to still havethis trait and this brain
(10:34):
function.
So if you show up to something,assuming the worst, then your
brain will start to look for theworst.
If you have that energy aboutyou.
That's your brain scanningexactly for that.
And here I have a really simpleexample.
This is my favorite example ofthis, the easiest way to
visualize it.
But say you are in the middleof a really great day or you
(10:58):
know what, even just a good day,good enough that you are
humming a little tune as youwalk into the supermarket to get
some things that you need.
You're minding your business,you're getting your things, and
you look up and you see thisreally mean-faced old man.
His arms are crossed, foldedacross his chest with a hmmph.
You know he's looking with thislook of disgust right in your
(11:24):
direction, but you're in a goodmood, you've got good energy
flowing through you.
Your brain is energeticallyfocused on the good.
You might just be like oh mygod, what is his problem?
That man looks like a totalgrouch, right.
Maybe you even flash him asmile and you just don't even
pay him any mind and you goalong your day, right.
Seems silly to ever letsomething as simple as this
(11:46):
grumpy guy in the grocery storeto affect you at all.
Duh, but now imagine That wasnot your day.
You did not come into the storehumming or energetically high
or happy, just minding yourbusiness because you're in a
rush, because you were runninglate and in your haste you
stubbed your toe and spilledyour coffee on your pants, and
(12:09):
now you aren't wearing pantsthat are comfortable and your
only goal is to get in and getout and finish this awful day
right.
And then, as you're trying toget that last thing you need,
you look up and you see him, thegrumpy old grouch Looking all
pissed and again looking righttowards you.
(12:29):
There's a very good chance thatyou don't just raise an eyebrow
and, you know, send him a smilejust for the sheer fact that
you can.
No, you're gonna take offenseto that.
We all would in that state,because you're just trying to
get what you need for dinner.
You're late and you look up andyou see this mean face pointing
at you like how dare he?
Who does he think he is?
(12:50):
He doesn't even know you andhe's judging you right.
See what I mean here.
How you feel and how youenergetically show up totally
changes Not only how your braininterprets your environment, but
how you move through it, and Iwant you to apply that concept
to a bigger scale.
Your whole day, your routinesin your day, your week How do
(13:12):
you move through it?
Do you have intention, a plan,goals that excite you, or are
you just going through themotions, trying to force it all
in?
When it comes to your goals andachieving the things that are
meant for you, how do you viewthem as you're planning to get
started?
For me, i know I would rathershow up with excitement, with
curiosity, with a positiveanticipation, rather than
(13:36):
relying on sheer determinationor motivation to get through
something that I've decided thatI'm dreading.
When I'm doing a personalcoaching session, i always keep
an ear out for people sayingthings like I have to do this.
I'll make myself do this,because here's the secret, my
(13:56):
friends Not only Is that notsustainable, but I'd go as far
as to say that it's rare thatsomeone can force themselves to
do something that they don'twant to do, something that they
think is awful or hard, thatthey just need to push through
it every day, day in, day out.
(14:18):
Even if you could, you don'twant to live that way.
The name of the game isdeveloping your lifestyle on
purpose, doing it in a way thatfeels good, that sets you up to
achieve the dream life and thedream day to day that we talked
about visualizing earlier, andthere's always some name for it,
some vernacular, if you will.
(14:39):
Right now I think people areeven calling it lucky girl
syndrome or something you knowsome iteration of that, that you
know some name for someone whothe good stuff just comes to
them.
And I giggled when I heard thatthe first time.
I absolutely love it and I'vetalked about it on here before
and I love the premise.
(15:00):
But I've always been told thatI am so lucky and I can't
understand this because thingsjust come easy to me and I
believe with my whole heart thatthe best and the most effective
way to be lucky It's not bychance, it's not again, you just
got lucky.
That's not the case.
(15:20):
To create luck is to getincredibly curious about how
good each thing you are doingcould possibly get.
How good can this get?
picture it, visualize it, becurious about it.
When I spend my timeintentionally curious about how
each and everything, how good itcan get for me, it opens me up
(15:42):
to the possibilities of how goodit can get.
And, to be a thousand percentperfectly clear here, i believe
that the luck we create withinour lives now I'm not talking
about things like Where you wereborn, the parents you were born
into that type of thing.
I'm not referring to that quote, unquote luck.
I'm talking about more the dayto day luck that we create in
(16:06):
our lives.
I believe that I'm not luckierthan anyone else in these
situations, but when I show upto something, my body language,
my demeanor, my actions, my aura, so to speak, my everything is
inviting and it I'm asking andsearching for the answer to the
question How good can this get?
And, just like we said before,your brain responds to you.
(16:30):
It starts searching how can weenjoy this more?
how can we play more, love thismore?
what is the best thing that Icould imagine happening?
And knowing that you don't needit, that you're perfectly
content with everything you have, but are super open to whatever
could make it better, that'swhen you start picking up on it.
Your brain goes into hyperdrivejust for that says okay, boss,
(16:55):
and people around you pick up onit to.
People perceive it and theyrespond accordingly.
Your reality responds to yourperception of it.
So, making sure that you areregularly checking in with how
you are choosing to show up andhow to go through your day to
your responsibilitiesresponsibilities you have to
(17:16):
others and responsibilities youhave for yourself, meaning all
the things you promised yourselfyou would do or start tomorrow,
or the things that, when youlaid down at night in your brain
, quiet, and starts to remindyou of, starts to think about
the things that would take youto the next level, or what you
know you need to do.
Choosing to actually do thosethings and allowing yourself to
(17:39):
be excited for them.
Deciding to feel ready insteadof dreading.
Flowing your energy toexcitement and physicality.
Flowing your energy toexcitement and visualizing just
how good it can get, because theenergy we have behind something
is the driving force thatcreates our actions, our
thoughts and our emotions.
(18:00):
I've said this before emotionsare literally just energy in
motion.
The energy we bring to anygiven moment profoundly impacts
the way we experience it and theoutcomes that we're able to
create.
And the beautiful thing is, wehave the power to consciously
choose what energy we bring toevery aspects of our lives.
(18:22):
We get to consciously decidehow we want to show up.
So look at the areas of yourlife that are most important to
you and I suggest you ask thisquestion How are you showing up?
Ask yourself Are you showing upwith enthusiasm and passion and
positivity, or is there a lowerlevel emotion attached, like
(18:46):
dread or resistance or some kindof negativity?
Think about your work or yourcareer or what you create.
Are you bringing a sense ofpurpose and excitement to that?
Are you working somewhere thatthat's even possible to do?
Can you?
Are you fully engaged andcommitted to making a difference
in something?
Or are you just going throughthe motions?
(19:09):
you know, counting down thehours until the day is over,
until the weekend, so you canrelax from it all?
When you bring a positive andvibrant energy to whatever
you're working on, to whateveryou're creating and giving, not
only do you inspire the peoplearound you, but you invite
collaboration with you And youopen yourself up to new
(19:30):
opportunities and growth andthings that look a lot like luck
.
And think about yourrelationships.
Are you showing up to all ofthe relationships that you care
about with love and kindness andempathy, to those people that
you love?
Are you actively listening andsupporting those people?
Or are you feeling frustration,impatience or indifference
(19:55):
because you don't have the timeand energy for them?
The energy that we have behindour relationship clearly affects
how our relationships work andthen how those relationships
affect us in return.
So make sure that you are againtaking inventory of where your
energy is going and if you haveenough to give the most
(20:16):
important parts.
Think about things like yourself-care and your personal
growth.
There, too, you need to checkin and know.
Are you showing up withself-compassion?
Are you prioritizing yourwell-being?
Are you investing in activitiesthat nourish your mind, your
body, your soul?
Are you pouring good into yourcup so that good can pour over
(20:39):
into all these other things, orare you neglecting yourself in
some way, pushing aside thethings that you know you need
for the sake of, maybe, otherresponsibilities or other people
?
Remember, taking care ofyourself and showing up for you
is essential for living apurposeful and fulfilling
lifestyle.
It's necessary to prioritizeyour self-care and your personal
(21:03):
growth, because that is how youreplenish your energy.
You refocus your energy againwhere you want it.
That's how you empower yourselfto show up fully in all these
areas of your life.
As we direct that energy andmake sure you've got enough to
do so, think about your futureand your life.
(21:24):
Think about how you show up forthe things you want.
Do you stay in a place ofexcitement, curiosity and with a
sense of belief, at least alittle bit in your own abilities
Or are you doubting yourself,fearing failure, holding tight
to those limiting beliefs thatwe work so hard to break through
, holding back from fullypursuing the lifestyle that you
desire and deserve?
(21:45):
Your energy and your mindsetplay a huge role I'd say the
most significant role in yourability to manifest and create
and achieve what you desire.
When you bring positive andempowered energy to your goals
and behind your goals, that'swhen you become aligned with the
possibilities that are outthere, all the luck that's out
(22:08):
there.
Aligned to the luck that youcan have, you unlock your
creativity and tap into yourresources so much better and are
able to take that inspiredaction towards your dreams which
causes you a reality to fall inline with exactly that.
That's where you find luck andmotivation and determination and
(22:28):
resilience.
So that's my theme of the weekStart paying attention.
Take some inventory of theenergy you bring to each moment
in your life.
Take a pause before diving intothe next thing and ask yourself
what energy do I want to embodyin this moment?
How can I show up in a way thataligns with the lifestyle I
(22:48):
desire to live?
And, as you go through the day,continuously check in with
yourself.
Notice when you start to slipinto a lower energy state or a
negative mindset And, if you are, just take a deep breath and
consciously choose to shift yourenergy back into a more
positive and empowered state, amore excited, a more curious
(23:10):
place.
Practice gratitude affirmationsor whatever helps.
Whatever helps you most.
Elevate your energy and yourmindset.
Remember, you do have the powerto choose how you show up And
by doing so you create thatripple effect of positivity and
of abundance, not only in yourlife, but in the lives around
(23:30):
you.
So, my darling loves, pleasestart applying this in your own
life.
Just put it in your back pocketand keep it with you always and
start taking ownership of theenergy you bring to the moments
and the interactions and thetasks that we have in life.
Embrace the power you have,that you get to show up with
intention and enthusiasm andlove, and you deserve to have
(23:53):
that as a staple in your life.
So here we go, let's go out andget this together.
We will create a week and alife that is aligned with our
desires and filled with positiveand purposeful energy.
Until next time, keep showing upfor you, and I can't wait to
hear where it takes you.
But all right, my loves, that'swhere I'll leave us today.
(24:16):
I want to thank you so much forjoining in on this conversation
with me, and each week, everyMonday, we're going to be
posting a new episode, going alittle bit deeper into the
conversation, of what you can doto train your brain on purpose,
to really allow for thelifestyle that you want to live.
Until next time, my loves.
In the meantime, here's to yourhealth and your happiness.
That's when you become aligned with the
possibilities that are out there, all the luck that's out there.
Aligned to the luck that youcan have, you unlock your
creativity and tap into yourresources so much better and are
able to take that inspiredactions towards your dreams
which causes your reality tofall in line with exactly that.
(00:22):
That's where you find luck andmotivation and determination and
resilience.
Hello, my loves, and welcome tothe Purposeful Lifestyle
Development Podcast, where wediscuss all things thought, work
and manifestation but we useneuroscience and the study of
the brain to do so.
I'm your host, tessa Spiesak.
(00:43):
I'm a board certifiedpractitioner, master life and
health coach and seasonedexecutive speaker.
If you are ready to create yourhighest value lifestyle and
turn your dream life into areality, you're in the right
place.
Let's get right in to today'sepisode.
Hello, hello, my loves, andwelcome back to the Purposeful
Lifestyle Development Podcast.
(01:04):
And if you're new, welcome in.
Don't forget to hit subscribeso that you never miss part of
our conversation.
If you haven't done so yet, i'dso appreciate it if you took a
second to leave a review onwhatever streaming service you
are listening on.
It helps boost the show so thatothers can join too.
But now that that's out of theway.
You may have noticed over thelast few weeks that the way I've
(01:27):
been structuring this podcast,so to speak, has been to give
you a theme or a topic to keepin mind over the week, just
another lovely little layer ofgoodness to give yourself
another practice that we canutilize to care for ourselves
even better, or a way to checkin, do some inventory with our
(01:47):
lives and make sure that we areliving present and in a way that
aligns with the lifestyle wedesire to live.
And this week I'm holding true,i'm doing the same.
I'm going to offer a thoughtthat I really suggest you hold
with you.
This is something that I keepin my head pretty much at all
times And even still, while I'mconsciously thinking about it, i
(02:12):
can still find myself notacting totally accordingly.
It does take some practice andsomething that you need to
actively keep, but it's totallyworth it.
But here's what I want you tohave from this conversation
today.
I want you to ask yourself whatenergy am I bringing to the
(02:32):
things I'm doing?
How am I showing up for and howam I showing up in my life
energetically?
And I want you to really,really think about it.
Get honest about it, not justhow you show up for work or how
you show up for the people thatdepend on you, but in a general
sense that covers everything youdo.
(02:53):
How are you energetically goinginto the things you do?
Think about it this way.
I want to walk you through it.
When I get quiet with myself andreally truly ask myself what
would my dream day look like?
Just my regular day In the lifeI live, if I could have a
(03:13):
perfect, regular Tuesday, not aspecial day, but just a regular
day, what would it look likeWhen I get serious and really
walk through the day in thatvisualization, what I envision
is me feeling literally amazingas I do everything.
When I see my ideal day, i'mreally excited to wake up you
(03:36):
know, up before my alarm clock,just ready to take on the day.
I'm relaxed and in tune with meduring my morning routine.
I'm not stressed about the dayor anything else.
I get to use that timeappropriately and for myself.
I'm not rushed.
I carefully and intentionallydo the things that I like that
(03:57):
are good for me, like myskincare.
I get some movement and I go inknowing that I will feel
amazing after I do a movement,and then I do feel amazing when
it's done.
Then, when I sit down to meetwith my clients, i'm so excited
and I'm pumped to hear what theyhave to say.
I'm ready to be proud of them.
(04:18):
I see myself having this bigburst of creativity and
excitedly making something newfor the people that I help.
I see myself feeling reallyplayful and going downstairs to
my husband's office and flirtingwith him and see myself being
really ready for some play, likesinging in the car.
In my perfect day I'm cookingfor my family and dancing to
(04:42):
music.
Like if I'm cooking Italianfood, i'm listening to Italian
cafe music and I'm in a lovelymood.
I see myself going to bedrelaxed, feeling happy with my
day and proud of myself andgrateful for everything that was
in the day and excited to do ittomorrow.
Now, if you look at that, yousee a consistent theme there.
(05:03):
It's all about the feeling.
It's all about, for me at least, how I energetically show up to
those things.
Just for the sake of comparison, in case it didn't fully click,
what I'm getting at picture thedifference between that ideal
day situation and what we'vebeen conditioned to do when we
(05:25):
aren't actively conscious on howand where our energy is flowing
Without having that intention.
You can picture this as in themorning, groaning through,
snoozing the alarm, thenshooting out of bed at the last
second, getting ready as fast asyou can.
The morning's frantic.
You end up dreading yourprojects that you're doing for
(05:47):
work, just dreading what you dofor work, stressed out because
we don't know what to do fordinner and then eating something
crappy that makes us feelcrappy because it was easy in
there.
Then we're annoyed with ourpartners because we don't want
to be touched.
Now, if you're not conscious,we know that story of life can
just be happening.
You're shooting your waythrough the moments and it
(06:08):
honestly just doesn't feel goodWhen you aren't in charge and
you aren't dictating where yourenergy goes and where you want
it to flow.
That ideal day that I described,or whatever version that you
would create, it's not going tohappen.
That flow, that space ofgratitude, that space that feels
abundant with bliss, that's notsomething that is reserved for
(06:33):
a lucky few who are lucky enoughto be in situations that allow
for it.
It's not a situational thing.
That's what most people think,but I'm telling you it's not the
case, because flow, gratitude,no-transcript That comes from
intention and it comes fromchoosing how you show up
(06:55):
energetically to all of thesethings.
And if you know me and you knowwhat I talk about in my
coaching and in my publicspeaking one of my pillars in
everything that I say when itcomes to the things you want to
do and want to accomplish youare doing yourself so much of a
disservice if you're quantifyingthe thing or the action or the
(07:17):
steps that it takes to do it orthe day that it causes to go
through it.
If you assume and classifythese things as they're going to
be hard or difficult or toomuch, before you even try,
you're going to make that true.
This is a hill I am willing todie on.
Don't choose for it to bedifficult or painful or
(07:37):
emotionally draining or whatever, and I know some people go
about this exactly in that wayand that's fine for them if it
works.
I get the idea in the theory.
Some people believe thatpreparing yourself for it to be
hard is something that will keepyou from quitting when it
inevitably does get difficult,because such is life right, it
(08:00):
will never be all the way easyall the time.
It's the human experience Andmy thought on that, honestly, is
, you wouldn't want it to besuper incredibly easy all the
time, because then we'd have nodesire for anything or any drive
in our souls.
And where would we find apurpose if there was no purpose?
because we never had to strivefor anything or persevere.
(08:22):
But sorry, that's a little bitof a tangent.
Anyway, my point is Iunderstand the concept of
preparing for the worst in caseit comes, and I'm sure that
makes sense on the surface, butwhen we understand how our
brains work, i'd say it'susually more in your favor to
work with your brain and how itfunctions.
(08:45):
Therefore, instead of telling itthat whatever you're showing up
for is going to be difficult orhard for you, that causes your
particular activating system tosay, ok, boss, i believe you,
and it starts to scan for allthe things that make that true.
It starts to scan for all thethings that can be perceived as
(09:07):
difficult, because we coveredthat one, my loves.
Your particular activatingsystem is like the filter for
your brain and it basicallyscans for whatever it's going to
alert you to.
There's so much stimuli allaround us all the time, for
every second, that it wouldliterally be maddening if we
picked up on every single thing.
So that's what our brain does,that particular activating
(09:29):
system.
It goes to work for us and,essentially, will let in the
stimuli or let in the proof ofwhatever we believe to be true.
It's always working,essentially to prove you right.
So if you say this thing that Ineed to do it's scary and it's
difficult and it's a hardsituation, ok, boss, that's what
(09:52):
it starts looking for.
I mean, this is the thing thatkept us alive as a species and
allowed us to become what we aretoday.
Because back in ourhunter-gatherer days, if you
were consciously aware that thesituation that you were in was
in fact scary, dangerous,difficult, then your brain goes
into hyperdrive trying to figureout how that can be true.
(10:13):
That's what keeps you safe.
It will literally scan theenvironment for a threat, even
in the background, even at thatsubconscious level.
If you knew there was some Idon't know tiger or bear
infested area, your brain wouldbe really sensitive to your
surroundings in search of thatthreat.
And we evolved to still havethis trait and this brain
(10:34):
function.
So if you show up to something,assuming the worst, then your
brain will start to look for theworst.
If you have that energy aboutyou.
That's your brain scanningexactly for that.
And here I have a really simpleexample.
This is my favorite example ofthis, the easiest way to
visualize it.
But say you are in the middleof a really great day or you
(10:58):
know what, even just a good day,good enough that you are
humming a little tune as youwalk into the supermarket to get
some things that you need.
You're minding your business,you're getting your things, and
you look up and you see thisreally mean-faced old man.
His arms are crossed, foldedacross his chest with a hmmph.
You know he's looking with thislook of disgust right in your
(11:24):
direction, but you're in a goodmood, you've got good energy
flowing through you.
Your brain is energeticallyfocused on the good.
You might just be like oh mygod, what is his problem?
That man looks like a totalgrouch, right.
Maybe you even flash him asmile and you just don't even
pay him any mind and you goalong your day, right.
Seems silly to ever letsomething as simple as this
(11:46):
grumpy guy in the grocery storeto affect you at all.
Duh, but now imagine That wasnot your day.
You did not come into the storehumming or energetically high
or happy, just minding yourbusiness because you're in a
rush, because you were runninglate and in your haste you
stubbed your toe and spilledyour coffee on your pants, and
(12:09):
now you aren't wearing pantsthat are comfortable and your
only goal is to get in and getout and finish this awful day
right.
And then, as you're trying toget that last thing you need,
you look up and you see him, thegrumpy old grouch Looking all
pissed and again looking righttowards you.
(12:29):
There's a very good chance thatyou don't just raise an eyebrow
and, you know, send him a smilejust for the sheer fact that
you can.
No, you're gonna take offenseto that.
We all would in that state,because you're just trying to
get what you need for dinner.
You're late and you look up andyou see this mean face pointing
at you like how dare he?
Who does he think he is?
(12:50):
He doesn't even know you andhe's judging you right.
See what I mean here.
How you feel and how youenergetically show up totally
changes Not only how your braininterprets your environment, but
how you move through it, and Iwant you to apply that concept
to a bigger scale.
Your whole day, your routinesin your day, your week How do
(13:12):
you move through it?
Do you have intention, a plan,goals that excite you, or are
you just going through themotions, trying to force it all
in?
When it comes to your goals andachieving the things that are
meant for you, how do you viewthem as you're planning to get
started?
For me, i know I would rathershow up with excitement, with
curiosity, with a positiveanticipation, rather than
(13:36):
relying on sheer determinationor motivation to get through
something that I've decided thatI'm dreading.
When I'm doing a personalcoaching session, i always keep
an ear out for people sayingthings like I have to do this.
I'll make myself do this,because here's the secret, my
(13:56):
friends Not only Is that notsustainable, but I'd go as far
as to say that it's rare thatsomeone can force themselves to
do something that they don'twant to do, something that they
think is awful or hard, thatthey just need to push through
it every day, day in, day out.
(14:18):
Even if you could, you don'twant to live that way.
The name of the game isdeveloping your lifestyle on
purpose, doing it in a way thatfeels good, that sets you up to
achieve the dream life and thedream day to day that we talked
about visualizing earlier, andthere's always some name for it,
some vernacular, if you will.
(14:39):
Right now I think people areeven calling it lucky girl
syndrome or something you knowsome iteration of that, that you
know some name for someone whothe good stuff just comes to
them.
And I giggled when I heard thatthe first time.
I absolutely love it and I'vetalked about it on here before
and I love the premise.
(15:00):
But I've always been told thatI am so lucky and I can't
understand this because thingsjust come easy to me and I
believe with my whole heart thatthe best and the most effective
way to be lucky It's not bychance, it's not again, you just
got lucky.
That's not the case.
(15:20):
To create luck is to getincredibly curious about how
good each thing you are doingcould possibly get.
How good can this get?
picture it, visualize it, becurious about it.
When I spend my timeintentionally curious about how
each and everything, how good itcan get for me, it opens me up
(15:42):
to the possibilities of how goodit can get.
And, to be a thousand percentperfectly clear here, i believe
that the luck we create withinour lives now I'm not talking
about things like Where you wereborn, the parents you were born
into that type of thing.
I'm not referring to that quote, unquote luck.
I'm talking about more the dayto day luck that we create in
(16:06):
our lives.
I believe that I'm not luckierthan anyone else in these
situations, but when I show upto something, my body language,
my demeanor, my actions, my aura, so to speak, my everything is
inviting and it I'm asking andsearching for the answer to the
question How good can this get?
And, just like we said before,your brain responds to you.
(16:30):
It starts searching how can weenjoy this more?
how can we play more, love thismore?
what is the best thing that Icould imagine happening?
And knowing that you don't needit, that you're perfectly
content with everything you have, but are super open to whatever
could make it better, that'swhen you start picking up on it.
Your brain goes into hyperdrivejust for that says okay, boss,
(16:55):
and people around you pick up onit to.
People perceive it and theyrespond accordingly.
Your reality responds to yourperception of it.
So, making sure that you areregularly checking in with how
you are choosing to show up andhow to go through your day to
your responsibilitiesresponsibilities you have to
(17:16):
others and responsibilities youhave for yourself, meaning all
the things you promised yourselfyou would do or start tomorrow,
or the things that, when youlaid down at night in your brain
, quiet, and starts to remindyou of, starts to think about
the things that would take youto the next level, or what you
know you need to do.
Choosing to actually do thosethings and allowing yourself to
(17:39):
be excited for them.
Deciding to feel ready insteadof dreading.
Flowing your energy toexcitement and physicality.
Flowing your energy toexcitement and visualizing just
how good it can get, because theenergy we have behind something
is the driving force thatcreates our actions, our
thoughts and our emotions.
(18:00):
I've said this before emotionsare literally just energy in
motion.
The energy we bring to anygiven moment profoundly impacts
the way we experience it and theoutcomes that we're able to
create.
And the beautiful thing is, wehave the power to consciously
choose what energy we bring toevery aspects of our lives.
(18:22):
We get to consciously decidehow we want to show up.
So look at the areas of yourlife that are most important to
you and I suggest you ask thisquestion How are you showing up?
Ask yourself Are you showing upwith enthusiasm and passion and
positivity, or is there a lowerlevel emotion attached, like
(18:46):
dread or resistance or some kindof negativity?
Think about your work or yourcareer or what you create.
Are you bringing a sense ofpurpose and excitement to that?
Are you working somewhere thatthat's even possible to do?
Can you?
Are you fully engaged andcommitted to making a difference
in something?
Or are you just going throughthe motions?
(19:09):
you know, counting down thehours until the day is over,
until the weekend, so you canrelax from it all?
When you bring a positive andvibrant energy to whatever
you're working on, to whateveryou're creating and giving, not
only do you inspire the peoplearound you, but you invite
collaboration with you And youopen yourself up to new
(19:30):
opportunities and growth andthings that look a lot like luck
.
And think about yourrelationships.
Are you showing up to all ofthe relationships that you care
about with love and kindness andempathy, to those people that
you love?
Are you actively listening andsupporting those people?
Or are you feeling frustration,impatience or indifference
(19:55):
because you don't have the timeand energy for them?
The energy that we have behindour relationship clearly affects
how our relationships work andthen how those relationships
affect us in return.
So make sure that you are againtaking inventory of where your
energy is going and if you haveenough to give the most
(20:16):
important parts.
Think about things like yourself-care and your personal
growth.
There, too, you need to checkin and know.
Are you showing up withself-compassion?
Are you prioritizing yourwell-being?
Are you investing in activitiesthat nourish your mind, your
body, your soul?
Are you pouring good into yourcup so that good can pour over
(20:39):
into all these other things, orare you neglecting yourself in
some way, pushing aside thethings that you know you need
for the sake of, maybe, otherresponsibilities or other people
?
Remember, taking care ofyourself and showing up for you
is essential for living apurposeful and fulfilling
lifestyle.
It's necessary to prioritizeyour self-care and your personal
(21:03):
growth, because that is how youreplenish your energy.
You refocus your energy againwhere you want it.
That's how you empower yourselfto show up fully in all these
areas of your life.
As we direct that energy andmake sure you've got enough to
do so, think about your futureand your life.
(21:24):
Think about how you show up forthe things you want.
Do you stay in a place ofexcitement, curiosity and with a
sense of belief, at least alittle bit in your own abilities
Or are you doubting yourself,fearing failure, holding tight
to those limiting beliefs thatwe work so hard to break through
, holding back from fullypursuing the lifestyle that you
desire and deserve?
(21:45):
Your energy and your mindsetplay a huge role I'd say the
most significant role in yourability to manifest and create
and achieve what you desire.
When you bring positive andempowered energy to your goals
and behind your goals, that'swhen you become aligned with the
possibilities that are outthere, all the luck that's out
(22:08):
there.
Aligned to the luck that youcan have, you unlock your
creativity and tap into yourresources so much better and are
able to take that inspiredaction towards your dreams which
causes you a reality to fall inline with exactly that.
That's where you find luck andmotivation and determination and
(22:28):
resilience.
So that's my theme of the weekStart paying attention.
Take some inventory of theenergy you bring to each moment
in your life.
Take a pause before diving intothe next thing and ask yourself
what energy do I want to embodyin this moment?
How can I show up in a way thataligns with the lifestyle I
(22:48):
desire to live?
And, as you go through the day,continuously check in with
yourself.
Notice when you start to slipinto a lower energy state or a
negative mindset And, if you are, just take a deep breath and
consciously choose to shift yourenergy back into a more
positive and empowered state, amore excited, a more curious
(23:10):
place.
Practice gratitude affirmationsor whatever helps.
Whatever helps you most.
Elevate your energy and yourmindset.
Remember, you do have the powerto choose how you show up And
by doing so you create thatripple effect of positivity and
of abundance, not only in yourlife, but in the lives around
(23:30):
you.
So, my darling loves, pleasestart applying this in your own
life.
Just put it in your back pocketand keep it with you always and
start taking ownership of theenergy you bring to the moments
and the interactions and thetasks that we have in life.
Embrace the power you have,that you get to show up with
intention and enthusiasm andlove, and you deserve to have
(23:53):
that as a staple in your life.
So here we go, let's go out andget this together.
We will create a week and alife that is aligned with our
desires and filled with positiveand purposeful energy.
Until next time, keep showing upfor you, and I can't wait to
hear where it takes you.
But all right, my loves, that'swhere I'll leave us today.
(24:16):
I want to thank you so much forjoining in on this conversation
with me, and each week, everyMonday, we're going to be
posting a new episode, going alittle bit deeper into the
conversation, of what you can doto train your brain on purpose,
to really allow for thelifestyle that you want to live.
Until next time, my loves.
In the meantime, here's to yourhealth and your happiness.
Popular Podcasts
Amy Robach & T.J. Holmes present: Aubrey O’Day, Covering the Diddy Trial
Introducing… Aubrey O’Day Diddy’s former protege, television personality, platinum selling music artist, Danity Kane alum Aubrey O’Day joins veteran journalists Amy Robach and TJ Holmes to provide a unique perspective on the trial that has captivated the attention of the nation. Join them throughout the trial as they discuss, debate, and dissect every detail, every aspect of the proceedings. Aubrey will offer her opinions and expertise, as only she is qualified to do given her first-hand knowledge. From her days on Making the Band, as she emerged as the breakout star, the truth of the situation would be the opposite of the glitz and glamour. Listen throughout every minute of the trial, for this exclusive coverage. Amy Robach and TJ Holmes present Aubrey O’Day, Covering the Diddy Trial, an iHeartRadio podcast.
Betrayal: Season 4
Karoline Borega married a man of honor – a respected Colorado Springs Police officer. She knew there would be sacrifices to accommodate her husband’s career. But she had no idea that he was using his badge to fool everyone. This season, we expose a man who swore two sacred oaths—one to his badge, one to his bride—and broke them both. We follow Karoline as she questions everything she thought she knew about her partner of over 20 years. And make sure to check out Seasons 1-3 of Betrayal, along with Betrayal Weekly Season 1.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.