March 27, 2025 • 43 mins
Hating on men won’t help you attract a good one, but this episode will.
Shadow Alchemy: https://21-day-break-up-glow-up-challenge.teachable.com/p/shadow-alchemy-awareness-activation-and-integration
JOIN THE ART OF ALCHEMY & TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE: 21-day-break-up-glow-up-challenge.teachable.com/p/the-art-of-alchemy-transmuting-pain-into-power
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The 21 Day Break Up Glow Up Challenge: https://21-day-break-up-glow-up-challenge.teachable.com/p/21-day-break-up-glow-up-challenge/
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For all worbooks/courses/find me on instagram: https://beacons.ai/vibinwithciicii
Connect With Me On Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vibinwithciicii/
Shadow Alchemy: https://21-day-break-up-glow-up-challenge.teachable.com/p/shadow-alchemy-awareness-activation-and-integration
JOIN THE ART OF ALCHEMY & TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE: 21-day-break-up-glow-up-challenge.teachable.com/p/the-art-of-alchemy-transmuting-pain-into-power
GET YOUR MAGNETIZING MUG AND MANIFEST WITH EVERY SIP: https://ciicii-shop.fourthwall.com/?
MAGIC MIND: https://www.magicmind.com/CIICIILT20
CIICIILT20 gets you up to 48% off your first subscription for the next 10 days or 20% off for a one time purchase #magicmind #mentalwealth #mentalperformance
Get Show Up As HER: https://www.amazon.com/Show-Up-As-Her/dp/1684811953/ref=sr_1_4?crid=3U4PAQ301711R&keywords=show+up+as+her&qid=1707844411&sprefix=show+up+as+her%2Caps%2C159&sr=8-4
Divine Feminine Workbook: https://21-day-break-up-glow-up-challenge.teachable.com/p/my-downloadable-101079
The 21 Day Break Up Glow Up Challenge: https://21-day-break-up-glow-up-challenge.teachable.com/p/21-day-break-up-glow-up-challenge/
Taking Your Power Back Workbook: https://21-day-break-up-glow-up-challenge.teachable.com/p/my-downloadable-16643
For all worbooks/courses/find me on instagram: https://beacons.ai/vibinwithciicii
Connect With Me On Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vibinwithciicii/
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
And cancel, so high Ectasa, cancel, it's not sorry and.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Hot take. Hating on men is not going to help
you attract a loving good man. What's a positive bitch
is how are we doing today? If you're hearing this episode,
then you are meant to be here. So keep listening
on that Bitch's Positive Podcast. Sometimes we will laugh. Other times, baby,
we're gonna cry, but we will always walk away feeling
(00:41):
our most empowered positive bitch self, that is babe in
true connection with herself or himself. On this podcast, we
unbecome who we are not so we can fully step
into exactly who we came here to be. If you
want to attract a loving relationship, you're not going to
be able to do that if you're hating on the
(01:03):
gender that you want to attract. The thing is, we
manifest what we really really really want, and we also
manifest what we really really really don't want. If all
you're doing day in and day out is gossiping with
your friends about how all men suck or how all
women are snakes, that's exactly what you're going to attract.
(01:26):
Think about it on a daily basis. You are broadcasting
all women are snakes. Or all men are trash and
they are terrible, then that is what you're going to
see in your reality. Every word you speak is instructing
your subconscious mind. You have something at the base of
your brainstem called the reticular activating system, and this acts
(01:48):
as a filter based on your own words and beliefs.
If you think, if you believe, if you say that
the only men out there are men who are trash,
that is what you're going to attract. That's what you're
gonna see in your reality. You can go to a
party where there are ten amazing men and one trash man.
(02:09):
Guess who you're gonna start talking to. Guess who's gonna
be attracted to you. Guess who you are going to
be faced with the trash man because your subconscious mind
wants to reaffirm to you that what you believe is
in fact true, So it will filter out all the
good men and filter towards you, the one man who's
going to reaffirm what you believe about the world and
(02:29):
men in general. Your life is quite literally in your
hands if you want to attract a better man. I know,
I know, I know. It might be so fun for
you to like the videos on TikTok that are complaining
about men. It might be so fun for you to
goss up about men and how they're all trashed with
your friends. Guess what, it's hurting you. The more you
(02:52):
say how terrible men are, the more you're affirming that
in your reality, the more you attract that to you.
And by the way, speaking from a woman's point of view,
but men, hello, this goes for you too. The more
you speak negatively about women, the more you hate on women,
the more you're going to attract that type towards you.
If you have nothing else to talk about, but how
(03:15):
bad a certain gender is, you need a hobby. I'm sorry,
you're boring. You are boring. I'm not gonna lie to you.
Why would I sit here and lie to you. I
have nothing to lose. You are boring If you have
nothing else to talk about, but how terrible men are?
You are boring. If you have nothing else to talk about,
then how terrible women are? Get a hobby, get a sport,
(03:36):
learn something new, pick up a book, for example, show
up as her my book where you can learn how
to become your most positive bitch self. That's right, it's
a whole entire curriculum on positive bitology. If you don't
want to read my book, how about take a course
on how to alchemize your pain into your power. You
(03:57):
can find the Art of Alchemy chorus in the link
in the show notes. How about learning how to transmute
your shadow all the parts of yourself that you deny
into your golden opportunity and key to open all the
doors that you wish to walk through. You can take
the shadow Alchemy course. How about you want to learn
(04:18):
how to take your Power Back? Get the Calling your
Power Back workbook. There are so many things for you
to do, and the links for all that is in
the show notes. To become a more interesting person, Maybe
the problem is not that everyone's trash out there. Maybe
you're boring. Maybe you really need something new to talk about.
I had to stop being friends with certain people because
all they did was talk trash about other people. They're boring.
(04:41):
I want to talk about how I want to build
an empire. How there are so much good in the world.
How to find solutions. If you keep talking about your problem,
you're never gonna find a solution. Oh, I'm sorry, How
do you expect to find a solution? When you're still
broadcasting the same energy as the problem. Oh right, that
does it makes sense? Hello, Hello, wake up and smell
(05:04):
the matrix. What are you doing? What are you doing?
You manifest what you really really want, and you manifest
what you really really really don't want. If you're hating
on men, you're hating on yourself because you are shutting
doors on good, healthy relationships. Good luck, Charlie. There you go.
Good luck, Charlie. If you want to attract a loving relationship,
(05:25):
there are not just millions, there's billions. There's billions of
people on this planet who are good, who want to
give you love, who want to show up as your hero.
The other day I channeled a message for this collective,
and the song that came through was I want to
be your hero. There is someone who wants to enter
(05:46):
into your life or has recently entered into your life,
and they want to show up for you. They want
to show you how much work they've done on themselves,
how much of a provider emotionally, mentally, intellectually, physically they
can truly be. They want to show up for someone,
and that someone is you. You have to realize that. Okay, yeah,
(06:06):
some people suck. Wow, you're on planet Earth. Not everyone's
gonna be great. And guess who's soul signed.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
Up for that?
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Yours did? Yours did?
Speaker 3 (06:16):
Your soul knew that there's going to be duality on
this planet. Your soul knew that there is going to
be polaterity on this planet, and your soul signed up
to learn, develop and grow from all the different energies
on planet Earth. So on some level, your soul wants
to experience what is in your current circumstance and what
(06:38):
you have gone through. If you keep hating on men,
hating on women, you're hating on yourself and you're limiting
your ability to attract a better partner. There are, like
I said, some people who just suck, and then there
are people who are amazing who are going to teach
you how beautiful love can be, who are going to
(07:00):
teach you how to receive love, who are going to
shock you that they are even real. You are going
to experience the type of love where you genuinely appreciate
how divinity is expressed through this other vessel.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
If you want help manifesting love, I highly recommend getting
my magnetizing mugs. I have a whole entire love connection
for divine union. I have two too too. Right here,
every single morning, when you're drinking your coffee or your tea,
that is a moment to manifest, to intend what it
is you wish to call into your reality. Instead of
(07:37):
listening to the news or looking at Instagram, take a
second encode what you're about to put into your vessel,
and then drink it up. This is going to fine
tune you to be the frequency of divine union. If
I've attracted you here, if you are listening, you are
someone who's meant to have divine union in this lifetime.
I have no doubt about it, or else you wouldn't
(07:58):
be here listening right now. Part of your your destiny
is divine union. Part of your destiny is learning how
to shed these limiting beliefs so you can see how
much of a conscious co creator you can really become.
Part of your destiny is realizing that you are the miracle.
You are the magic, and you are the master. If
you want to attract a loving relationship, you want to
(08:21):
stop hating men. First things First, get a hobby, Get
something to direct your mind to. Your mind is always
going to go towards what is loudest in its reality.
If you keep getting trauma experience after trauma experience, because
you keep going out and dating but you're not shifting
your frequency, You're going to compound momentum of negative energies
(08:44):
and entities. If you keep experiencing men who are inconsistent,
who don't treat you well, take a beat, take a moment,
take a seat, because there's something in your energetic field
that you need a cleanse, that you need to shift,
that you need to release before you can change your resons.
I had to go four weeks of isolation. I did
not go out, I did not see people. I would
(09:06):
go out to a workout class, I would go to
yoga and I would work I did not drink. I
stayed in and after four weeks I felt an energy
being released from my body. And when I went back
out there, it was all fine and dandy, and I
attracted better people. Sometimes it's not the people out there.
You actually need to take a beat. You need to
take some time to read a book, to reset, to
(09:28):
shake off some of the experiences that you have been
dealing with, because if you keep going out there with
the same frequency, you're gonna keep getting the same results.
Give your mind something to focus on besides the trauma
that you've endured. Give yourself something to be proud about.
Give yourself something new to talk about. Hey, friends, guess what.
I just tried this new yoga class and it was amazing.
(09:49):
You gotta try it with me. Hey, I just started
reading this book and it's really changing the way I
think you might want to read it too. Introduce your
friends your family to a new way of thinking. Be
a beat of a light. How about that. The second
thing you need to do if you want to stop
hating men, if you want to attract a better relationship,
is to realize your own power. A healed woman does
(10:11):
not hate men, She just doesn't entertain the ones that
aren't on her level. Not all men deserve access to Hugh,
period full stop. When you allow just anyone and everyone
into your field and you don't have a high standard,
you are inviting in low quality experiences. Is it the
(10:34):
fault of the Brads and the Chads of the world
that you don't have standards? Is it the fault of
Joey and Germane that you keep allowing people into your
life that disrespect you? Whose hands is your life in
a mind that lives under a bridge and doesn't speak.
(10:55):
Is that who controls your life? Who controls your life?
Because if you're not living for you, who are you
living for? And what are you doing on the planet
right now? You have to simply raise your standard for
what you're going to allow in your life. And let
me just tell you. Every time, and sometimes I was
scared not gonna lie, But every time I raised my
(11:16):
standard of what I was willing to allow, I got
a better person, place, or circumstance every single time. The
divine does not disappoint. The divine does not disappoint. Say
it with me, The divine does not disappoint When you say, actually, no,
I'm not willing to accept that. The electromagnetic field you
reside within will bend to your will. Your subconscious mind
(11:39):
will blossom and attract someone who is of a higher caliber.
But who has to make that decision?
Speaker 3 (11:49):
You? You?
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Only you can do it. The way I think about
it is, I won't even eat a cupcake. I won't
even put a cupcake into my body. I'm definitely not
gonna put Brad who doesn't have a day job, into
my body. I won't even have a piece of cake.
So I'm not going to allow Chad who is inconsistent
and disrespects me into my body. I limit how much alcohol,
(12:14):
how much caffeine, how much everything I put into my body. Yeah,
I'm definitely not gonna allow some random person into my vessel?
What do you allow? Reflective moment Looking back, I definitely
had times where I would think, why is this person
doing this to me? Why is this person treating me
like this? I always think of Specimen six f four.
(12:36):
By the way, if you're new to this podcast, I
call some of the men that I've dated special men.
Get it. You have to understand that I treat my
life as an experiment, and based on my thoughts and emotions,
it will manipulate the energy around me. So everyone I
come into contact with is basically a social science experiment.
(12:58):
You're also talking to someone who had four hours of
science a day in high school. I was in a
specialized science program women in stem Literally, I even went
to science camp. We don't need to go down that
rabbit hole anyway. Specimen six foot four. Mmmm, he looked
like a Viking. Yes he did. He treated me terribly. Ooh,
that man was a sad individual. He just had. He
(13:21):
had a lot of wounds. But I looked at him
and said, ooh, something for me to fix. That's my
own damn fault. I knew exactly what that was when
I was walking into it. But out of my own wounds,
I said, oh, yes, I want that. Out of my
own people pleaser, martyr wounds. I wanted that. I knew
full well what I was doing. Your trauma is not
your fault, but it is your responsibility to heal. Okay,
(13:47):
So with Specimen six foot four, what I had to
start saying to myself is, you know what, I keep
getting mad at this clown, But why am I not
taking responsibility over the fact that I keep going to
the circus. I don't need to go to his apartment.
I don't need to go meet up with him. I
don't need to text him and tell him that the
sandwich he cooked looks good it looks terrible. I don't
(14:10):
need to do that. Instead of blaming him, why don't
I take responsibility. As soon as you blame someone else,
you're saying that your life is in their hands. As
soon as you blame someone else, you're saying that they
have more power over your reality. Than you do. If
you want to do that, go off. Honestly, it doesn't
affect me. Have fun. It's not going to serve you.
(14:30):
It's not going to help you. You won't get good results.
If you want to be a victim of planet Earth
have fun, I can tell you you won't. You won't.
Here's a fast pass. You won't enjoy it. Take it
from someone who tried it. It doesn't work. It does
not work. Whatever you allow you amplify in your own
(14:51):
field and your life experience. If you keep allowing people
to disrespect you, you're going to keep attracting people who
disrespect you. If you can people allowing them to never
make a plan with you and text you at nine
pm to come over as a booty call, that's what
you're going to get more of. If you never require
them to take you out to dinner and you act
like the girlfriend without being paid with the title of
(15:11):
the girlfriends, you're going to get more of that. You
have to reclaim your power by first of all taking
responsibility and stop going to the circus, and secondly by
having boundaries. Who are boundaries for? Are they for other people?
Are they for the mystical mime? Under the bridge. No,
(15:32):
boundaries are actually for you for what you're willing to accept,
for what you're willing to endure. Did I forget to
mention that fun is your divine right, that pleasure is
your divine right, and you don't only have to learn
through pain. Oh yeah, boundaries are for you to have
a better life experience. I won't entertain inconsistency or weird,
(15:55):
shady energy. I simply don't care. No one is that important,
No one is that important. I came into this world alone,
and ultimately I'm gonna leave it alone. Do I want
love yes? Do I love divine union?
Speaker 1 (16:07):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (16:07):
Do I love relationships yes? Do I love men and women?
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (16:12):
We love everyone. But I'm not stupid, and neither are you.
So I won't entertain something that's taking from me more
than it's giving to me. If you are dealing with
inconsistency narcissistic energies, all that's trying to show you is
you don't choose yourself enough. You're still in a people
(16:33):
pleasing container, and you need to learn how to prioritize yourself.
If you keep day after day getting inconsistent behavior from
the men that you're dating, it's showing you that you
are actually inconsistent with yourself. If men keep ghosting you,
it's because you are ghosting yourself. If they keep abandoning you,
it's because you are abandoning yourself. Look at what they're
doing to you. Because the electromagnetic field is trying to
(16:56):
show you how you're actually treating yourself. The biggest me
will be your intimate relationships. They are going to show
you exactly they're going to amplify how you're treating yourself.
Boundaries aren't for them. It's so you don't lose your shit.
It's so you can remain on your own pedestal. It's
so you can require and then have a higher quality
(17:17):
of life. Boundaries are for you to respect yourself and
to realize that you have the most power over your reality.
Stop positively reinforcing bad behavior by people pleasing and just
doing whatever it is that they want. Because the more
you entertain the guy who's inconsistent, the more you block
off the lover guy who wants to give you all
(17:39):
of his love and be your hero. The more you
entertain the guy who doesn't really care about you, the
more you block off the guy who wants to give
you everything. The more you entertain the clowns of the world,
the less you're going to receive that prince energy. They
are there, but you're not going to be able to
find them. If you're engaging with people who literally don't
(18:02):
care about you, it's not about them being evil. It's
about you saying I have to create proximity from them.
They're showing me how they feel about me through their
actions of disrespect, and instead of me asking why don't
they love me? I'm gonna ask myself why do I
accept this behavior? Flip the script, make yourself the subject
(18:25):
of your sentence again. Instead of wondering why won't they
choose me? Why the hell do you never choose yourself?
Instead of asking yourself, why aren't they attracted to me?
Ask yourself, why am I attracted to someone who literally
doesn't care about me. This has nothing to do with them.
This has to do with you and your own lower
(18:47):
self worth, your low self esteem. This has to do
with the fact that you're still trying to prove to
yourself that you're worthy of love. Your inner child right
now is screaming, So it's time for you to realize
that you're not just your innercher. You're also your wives
inner adults reparent that girl and say, listen, little CC,
(19:07):
you deserve more. And the only reason you're attracted to
someone who's inconsistent is because the caregiver you crave love
from growing up was inconsistent with you. And you're still
trying to master that dynamic by repeatedly impulsively attracting people
who remind you of that caregiver.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
No more.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Instead of trying to convince people to choose me, I'm
going to choose myself. What's going to bring me joy?
What can I improve in my life? What do I
have dreams of? And how can I make that my
new north star. Give your mind something to focus on
so that you're in control of your life. Otherwise your
mind will find things to worry about. If you don't
(19:50):
have something to positively obsess about that's going to empower you.
Like reading a new book, learning a new language, mastering
your body, mind's spirit, your mind will find something to
worry about. In the same way you wouldn't positively reinforce
your dog's bad behavior. Don't positively reinforce their bad behavior
(20:10):
or yours, because then you're only going to elongate your
own trauma. Right now, right here, We're gonna make two shifts.
The first shift is shifting from our inner child of
why won't they love me? To your wise inner adults,
Why don't I love myself enough to leave? Why is
it so hard for me to choose myself? The wrong
questions will never give you the right answer, So flip
(20:31):
the script. The second shift you're gonna make is from
Mary Magdalen to Lilith. Mary Magdalen is a very loving energy.
It's the role of endlessly forgiving, leading with love, washing
of the feet, being in service. If you are consistently
being mistreated, you might have been in an overact of
Mary Magdalen energy of giving, give and giving giving, and
(20:53):
you actually need to give to yourself. So what are
you going to switch into Lilith? Lilith was actually, according
to Jewish folklore, Adam's first wife, and Lilish was banned
from the Garden of Eden because she decided that she
did not want to allow Adam to get on top
of her. She wanted to be on top, and when
he said no, she left the Garden of Eden and
(21:16):
she went near the Dead Sea. And then God sent
a couple of angels to try to convince her to
come back, and she said no. And when she said no,
she was basically banned from the Garden of Eden. Lilith
is an energy who stands up for herself, who speaks
up for what she wants, who says no, actually I
don't want you on top of me. I want to
(21:37):
be on top. Actually no, I don't want to be
in this space. I want to be over there. You
want me to come back, Well, you're not giving me
what I want. So the answer is no. I want
you to make a conscious shift. From Mary Magdalene, the giver,
the more martyr, the more people pleas are, the lover,
the washing of the feet, to Lilith. No boundaries. I
(22:01):
know what i want. I'm getting what I want. The
divine does not disappoint me. I'm focused, I'm energized. I'm
on my own pedestal from inner child to wise inner adults.
I have boundaries. I respect myself. I understand that the
higher my standard, the better quality experiences I'm going to get.
Something that I've spoken about is what I call the
(22:22):
Harvard principle. These Ivy League schools, they have a really
high standard and a low acceptance rate. Apply that to
your own life. Have a high standard for what you're
going to allow and a low acceptance rate for bs.
When you see someone can't give you what you want,
that's not a moment for you to try to prove
your worth. It's a moment for you to realize, oh,
(22:42):
they're incapable, but someone else will be capable. Not everyone
can afford Chanel. Chanel isn't like, oh my god, this
is so embarrassing that they can't afford me. They're like, no,
we want someone else, someone else who can afford me.
Chanell knows if that person can't afford the bag, another
person will. If someone can't give you what you want,
(23:03):
someone else will. There is something called the boyfriend effect,
where people say that when a girl gets into a
relationship with a guy, the guy gets better looking, better style,
But when a girl gets into a relationship, she ends
up either gaining or losing too much weight, they say,
looking frazzled all the time, doesn't have enough time to
do or make up her hair. And the way I
(23:25):
have kind of faced this because I literally thought about
this and I thought that makes me not want to
have a boyfriend. I know this is so little, but
that really did cross my mind, And if you were
like me, you might have thought about that too. I
just want to say, having the right boyfriend, the right partner,
actually allows you to have like this glow up because
(23:46):
someone is giving you so much compassion, so much love,
so much attention that you feel so safe and grounded
on the planet that you actually glow up even more.
When I thought about people spreading this negative narrative, the
boyfriend effect, when you get into a relationship you get uglier,
I literally thought to myself, I'd rather be single and pretty.
(24:06):
I'm sorry, I don't know what that makes me. It
makes me honest, I'll say that, but yeah, I'm not
trying to be an ugo. So I had to consciously
say to myself, I've reject that narrative of the matrix,
and I had to start telling myself that when you're
in a relationship with the right person, you actually have
a glow up. Now, when you are in a relationship
(24:27):
with the wrong person, you do get anxiety. So that
can cause weight gain, weight loss, it can cause hair loss,
it can cause allergic reactions. When I was in a
relationship for a while that was not the right one,
I was breaking out in hives all of the time.
So being with the wrong person can have a negative
effect on your physical body because you're spending so much
time in your sympathetic nervous system, your fight and flight response,
(24:50):
which means that you're going to be pumping out cortisol
and that's going to have a negative effect on your appearance.
So being with the wrong person can negatively affect how
you look. But let's not call that the boyfriend effect,
because that did affect how I looked at relationships, and
I want to just put that as a side note.
So when you're with the right person, it does make
you prettier, it makes you healthier, it makes you happier.
(25:12):
Being with the wrong person, whether it's a friendship, a coworker,
that's always going to have a negative effect on you
because of your nervous system. You have to start looking
for evidence of what you want to experience. If you
want to experience a good man, look for good men
in your life. Is there a trainer at the gym?
Is there an uncle? Is there a brother? Is there
(25:34):
a friend? Is there a father your friend's dad? Is
there a coach? Is there any man in your life?
That you look at and say, Damn, that's a good father,
that's a good husband, that's a good dad, that's just
a good man. Because the more you highlight and emphasize
the positive qualities that you like in the masculine energy,
(25:55):
the more you're going to attract that towards you and
when you notice it, have a moment of appreciation. Wow.
I really love how that coach talks to the women
that he coaches. He really gives them space to show
up as their most authentic self, whether they're being emotional
having a day, or whether they're feeling really strong that day.
(26:17):
He really allows them space to just be them. Or
I really love how my friend's boyfriend is sweet with
her and sensitive with her, but yet can be really
masculine when he needs to be. I will tell you
I'm in a relationship right now with such a good man.
I've dated other good men. They just weren't my man,
but they were good men. Think about men you dated.
(26:37):
Maybe they weren't the one, but you're like, yeah, they
were really kind, they were really nice. They showed up
for me if I needed something, they were there for me.
I recognize good people everywhere I go because it makes
me feel good and it makes me happy. Start to
recognize the good men that are in your life, or
even just knowing that I currently am in a relationship
(26:58):
with a good man can help you realize that there
are still good men out there. I met this man
about a little over two months ago. All those narratives
that there is no good men left, well, that's a
lie because I just met one two months ago. The
sentiment that there are no good men period, that's a
lie because I'm dating one right now. The sentiment that
there's no masculine men anymore, that's a lie because I'm
(27:19):
dating one right now. The sentiment that there's no emotionally
available guys, that's a lie because I'm dating one right now.
That's actually one of the first things I said to
my boyfriend is WHOA you are so emotionally available. I
was actually shocked that when I went on our first date,
I already deleted my hinge, and so did he, even
(27:40):
though we never spoke about it. He was still so
ready for commitment and a relationship. Now, mind you, before
we met, who deleted hinge?
Speaker 1 (27:48):
Me?
Speaker 2 (27:49):
I did. On eleven eleven, November eleventh, I deleted hinge
and then on January eleventh, I re downloaded it and
we matched. I knew I could not deal with any
more men, because if I did, I was going to
start to believe the negative things that people said about them,
because not every single relationship or experience I had with
a man was roses and daisies. Some of them were
(28:11):
more difficult, Some were facing me with a lot of
shadow work that I had to do, and I understood
that it was my responsibility to take a beat and
do that shadow work so I could stop attracting the
same experiences. You know what you need to do. You're
hearing these words, and you know what you need to do.
If you're feeling burnt out, delete the apps, stop dating,
(28:31):
and work on yourself. Take the shadow Alchemy course. That's
exactly what I did before I met my current partner.
I knew I needed to take a break, so I did,
and once I took a break and worked on myself,
I then did attract a better person. They are out there.
Start looking for them, because right now, if you're talking
about how all men are trash, that means you're also
(28:52):
looking for men who are trashed. Your particular activating system
is going to do the filtering for you. And if
you're thinking about how all men are tracked, that's what
you're gonna notice. That's what's gonna be highlighted to you.
So you have to start looking for what it is
you want to find. When you start looking for what
it is you want to find, the funny thing is
yet end up finding it. Think about the observer effect.
When scientists observed an electron, it's solidified. It condensed from
(29:17):
a wavelength into a three D particle. This means that
what we look for we will find. When the scientists
looked away, the one solid particle went back into wave
length form. What you look for will be condensed in
your reality. If you're looking and thinking and talking about
how all men are trash, that's what you're gonna find.
(29:37):
But if you look, if you think, if you feel,
if you talk about how there are good men out there,
that's what you're going to find. That's just how your
brain works, It's how the electromagnetic field works, it's how
your subconscious mind works. Let's say you're thinking, CC, I
don't know any good men even look at couples, and
I don't love this, but I'm grasping for straws here.
People even look at people who you think a really
(30:00):
good relationship online and say, I love the way that
boyfriend does this, I love the way that husband does that.
I don't watch like family bloggers or people like that,
so I don't know what's going on on the internet
these days, but there's gotta be someone. So find someone
you like and go for that. If you can't find
anyone in your reality that's a good man, you can't
find someone on the internet that you think is good
(30:21):
to their girlfriend or their wife, call on Jesus, call
on Archangel Michael, call on Archangel Raphael, and use even
a loving ancestor as someone to give you energetic security.
There was a time in my life where I was
just fed up with guys in the masculine energy, So
instead of relying on them in the physical form, I
(30:43):
just started working with Jesus every single day, and knowing
that there was this masculine energy around me that was
supporting me, directing me, protecting me all the time. It
really just gave me that extra blanket of security and
safety that I was wanting from a physical guy, and
I do think ultimately that allowed me to attract a
(31:05):
man who did give me safety. If you want to
attract safety, it's sort of annoying, but you have to
broadcast it before you actually get it out there. So
if you want to attract a masculine partner, start with
working with divinity. Date the divine In the couple of
months between November eleven and January eleven, what was I doing.
(31:27):
I was working with Brother Jesus. I was working with
Archangel Michael. I was working with my divine team of
light beings. I was working with Saint Germain and the
Violet Flame to burn up seeds of karma. I was
doing the energetic work because there's really no pill you
can take to cleanse your energy. You just gotta do
the work. So strap in, take a beat, and do
(31:49):
the energetic work of the shadow work of transmuting your
pain so you can actually attract different experiences. You can
blame men for the rest of your life. It's not
going to change what you attracts. I will remind you
that all the courses are in the show notes. Thank
you so much. Your past does not have to equal
your future. It does not have to equal your present,
(32:10):
and your power doesn't lie in your past nor your future.
It lies in this moment right here to me. It
was really helpful to realize that some of the more
I could label them negative experiences I've had with men,
I now on the other side of that experience, realize
those were destined, Those were here by soul contracts because
(32:34):
I needed to learn through those experiences. My human self
CEC would never have chosen what I've experienced with some men.
I would have never chosen that. CC didn't choose that,
though my soul did. My eternal soul that has had
many lifetimes and that will have many more lifetimes, chose
to have certain men come into my life and trigger
(32:57):
me and a little bit of traumatize me so that
I can learn to develop and grow. I've made peace
with that. I truly know that in my bones that
that was all happening for me, and on some level
I chose it. I am so sorry if something negative
or traumatizing or something really hurtful has happened to you,
(33:18):
and I do want to take this moment to just
honor everything that you have been through, and I want
to honor that you're still kicking and screaming, and I
want to honor that you are still here and I
want to honor that, even though shit has happened, you're
still trying so hard to heal, and you're still trying
so hard to show up as your best self, and
(33:40):
you're still trying to just maybe take the next breath,
and you're still trying to just take the next step,
and you're still trying just to wake up and get
out of bed and go to work. I want to
honor that because that is not easy. That is not easy,
and most people kick the bucket. Most people don't care.
They let their trauma dictate how they're going to live
(34:02):
the rest of their life. And you're not. You're not.
So I know if you're listening to this, then you
have enough will within you, You have enough momentum within
you to realize that maybe, on some level, your soul
chose is to give to you the momentum you need
to move forward and to build the life of your dreams.
I know that on some level, there is an ancient
part of your soul right now that's itching to break
(34:26):
to break down the barriers you feel other people have
put you in, to break down the box you feel
other people have put you in. There's a part of
your soul that maybe's listening to me right now and
knows that this is your truth, that you're more than
what has happened to you. You're more than what you've experienced,
(34:48):
and you have this new found maybe anger or resentment
or hurt that you know that you can take this
pain and use it as fuel to create. You ate
that business, or to do the workout, or just to heal,
or just to breathe, or just to go to work.
You can use your pain and transmute it into power.
(35:10):
You are an alchemist. You have the ability to transmute
energy into anything you want. And that's why you're so powerful.
That's why your soul has led you here today. You're
not listening to this by accident. You're not here by
some random weirdo circumstance. No, this is my divine design
and you designed it. Your soul designed that you would
(35:31):
be listening to me right now. Your soul design that
you would be here so you could get gifted these
codes to up level your life. On some level, maybe
you're realizing that your human self will never be able
to logically understand what you've gone through. Your human self
will never be able to logically connect the dots. Your
human self might not ever be able to understand why.
(35:54):
But what if that's not the point of what has
happened to you? What if the point isn't understand why.
What if the point was just to experience it so
you could cultivate momentum within your body to birth a
new cycle, to birth a new you, to become even
more powerful. What if that pain is just momentum to
(36:16):
push you forward. You don't have to agree with me,
but all I invite you to do is open up
and become curious. What if? What if, on some sol
crazy level, I actually chose this through a soul contract
(36:37):
so that I could become more powerful. I was in
an energy class ones and the teacher Anton was telling
us that this woman was in a really abusive relationship
for most of her life, and when she got out
of it and started to heal and did past life regression,
(36:57):
she actually found out that in a past life she
was her current abusive partner's abusive spouse. So in a
past life she abused this soul, and then in this
life she had to pay karmic debt to that soul.
I'm not saying that to you. I'm not saying that's
what you've been through. I'm not saying that even applies
to you. The reason I bring this up is because
(37:21):
we have to realize that we are not made in
a vacuum. We have past life energies that follow us
into this one. And that means that, yeah, sometimes there's
karma we got to pay up to other souls. That
means that, yeah, we do choose certain experiences to push
us to grow, develop and learn. It means that we
(37:46):
are more than just this current incarnation. I invite you
to become curious instead of furious at what you have experienced,
because in curiosity, you can grow, you can change, and
you can try to better. I highly recommend if you
are dealing with more difficult energy is to join the
(38:06):
Art of Alchemy course because it's going to help you
transmute some of those seeds of karma, but also any
lower vibrational emotion that maybe you're having trouble working through.
I want to remind you that as you're listening just
to this podcast, you are changing on a cellular level,
that you are changing on an energetic level, and walking forward,
(38:27):
you are never going to attract what you have because
it's scientifically impossible. As you shift in vibration, as you
listen to these words, as you learn more about yourself,
your energetic signature is shifting, So what you attract must
shift its energetic law. We have to remember that we
don't just attract what is like a vibration to us.
(38:48):
We attract based on our own beliefs. So if I
believe that all men suck, all bosses suck, that's what
I'm going to attract. I want to remind you some
bosses do suck, some men do suck. Some dogs are violent,
some women are annoying to me, they are. I want
to remind you that in general, yeah, some people are
(39:12):
not great, but when you generalize that to a whole
entire gender, you hurt yourself. If I allowed past experiences
with women to dictate how I saw all women, I
would be in big old trouble. I had friendships where
people did not really treat me that well. Women did
not treat me well. They low key bullied me, they
(39:35):
isolated me, they let me out. If I was to say, well,
that's how all women are, I would never be able
to have any friends that were women ever. If I
allowed my negative experiences with some of the men to
dictate how I dated in the future, I would never
have been able to attract my current partner. Some chocolate
tastes bitter, some dogs are violent, some men are trash.
(39:59):
But stop saying it's all of them, because that is
limiting what you are able to attract. You have to
open up your thresholds for what you're willing to receive
and what you're willing to believe about the world. If
you don't believe that there are good men out there,
start to open yourself up by using what if statements.
(40:21):
What if there are really good men out there? What
if I could attract a partner that is super kind,
super gentle, and yet super masculine. What if my husband
is the hottest, wealthiest, funniest man out there? Have fun
with this. If you want to play a game with
(40:42):
yourself or friends, do the what if game. What if
I attract a partner who is everything I could want
and more?
Speaker 3 (40:48):
What if the.
Speaker 2 (40:49):
Universe blesses me with the best person I could even
conceive and think about? What if my relationships just get
better and better and better and better and better. What
if when someone would say that all men suck to me?
Or when I would see something I didn't like in
a man, I would just say to myself, my husband
would ever do that. That man might be doing it,
(41:10):
that man might be a cheater, that man might be this,
But my husband, Nope, My husband is the sweetest, the kindest,
the most masculine man out there. My husband would never
do that to me. So I don't care if I'm
dating someone in a relationship with someone. I'm just looking
at someone. If they do something I don't like, I'm
going to say my husband would never do that, because
I'm not going to hurt my ability to attract the
(41:32):
best of the best of the best of the best.
And by the way, whatever you have experienced, if it
has left your life, just know that it gets better.
It gets better. If something was divinely removed from your life,
it's because there's something better out there. Your past experiences
with men are there for you to learn from. They're
not there to dictate what your future is going to
(41:54):
look like. Your past with men and who you have
dated is there for you to develop from. To you
as a jumping off point, not as a mirror for
what you're going to attract in your future. Let your
past be your past and let it rest in peace.
It has nothing to do with where your going. It
gets better from here. That's how the universe works. It's
(42:17):
constantly rerouting. You think about your GPS. If you go
off track, what does it do. It reroutes you back
onto the correct path. It doesn't bully you about your
past and say you have to go back to where
you start to know. It just reroutes you onto another
road to get you where you want to go. If
you know that you want a better partner, you want
better relationships, then that's what you're going to get. But
(42:38):
you might be rerouted. You might have to go through
a breakup. You might have to say no, you might
have to set a boundary, you might have to shift
your beliefs, you might have to take the art of
alchemy course. But you're gonna get there. Enjoy the season,
enjoy where you're at, because it gets better from here.
As always, the sparkling me honors of sparkling you. I'm
sending you so much love. If you've not yet gotten
your copy of show Up as Her, be shore to
(43:00):
get that so that you can elevate your frequency and
therefore your wife. If you did enjoy the book, be
sure to leave a positive review on Amazon. And if
you're enjoying this podcast, it really helps the podcast if
you can share it with your friends and loved ones
and if you can leave a positive review on Apple
Podcasts and Spotify. I love you so much and I'll
see you in the next one.
Speaker 1 (43:28):
Cancer can
Speaker 2 (43:46):
Cancer, Cancer
And cancel, so high Ectasa, cancel, it's not sorry and.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Hot take. Hating on men is not going to help
you attract a loving good man. What's a positive bitch
is how are we doing today? If you're hearing this episode,
then you are meant to be here. So keep listening
on that Bitch's Positive Podcast. Sometimes we will laugh. Other times, baby,
we're gonna cry, but we will always walk away feeling
(00:41):
our most empowered positive bitch self, that is babe in
true connection with herself or himself. On this podcast, we
unbecome who we are not so we can fully step
into exactly who we came here to be. If you
want to attract a loving relationship, you're not going to
be able to do that if you're hating on the
(01:03):
gender that you want to attract. The thing is, we
manifest what we really really really want, and we also
manifest what we really really really don't want. If all
you're doing day in and day out is gossiping with
your friends about how all men suck or how all
women are snakes, that's exactly what you're going to attract.
(01:26):
Think about it on a daily basis. You are broadcasting
all women are snakes. Or all men are trash and
they are terrible, then that is what you're going to
see in your reality. Every word you speak is instructing
your subconscious mind. You have something at the base of
your brainstem called the reticular activating system, and this acts
(01:48):
as a filter based on your own words and beliefs.
If you think, if you believe, if you say that
the only men out there are men who are trash,
that is what you're going to attract. That's what you're
gonna see in your reality. You can go to a
party where there are ten amazing men and one trash man.
(02:09):
Guess who you're gonna start talking to. Guess who's gonna
be attracted to you. Guess who you are going to
be faced with the trash man because your subconscious mind
wants to reaffirm to you that what you believe is
in fact true, So it will filter out all the
good men and filter towards you, the one man who's
going to reaffirm what you believe about the world and
(02:29):
men in general. Your life is quite literally in your
hands if you want to attract a better man. I know,
I know, I know. It might be so fun for
you to like the videos on TikTok that are complaining
about men. It might be so fun for you to
goss up about men and how they're all trashed with
your friends. Guess what, it's hurting you. The more you
(02:52):
say how terrible men are, the more you're affirming that
in your reality, the more you attract that to you.
And by the way, speaking from a woman's point of view,
but men, hello, this goes for you too. The more
you speak negatively about women, the more you hate on women,
the more you're going to attract that type towards you.
If you have nothing else to talk about, but how
(03:15):
bad a certain gender is, you need a hobby. I'm sorry,
you're boring. You are boring. I'm not gonna lie to you.
Why would I sit here and lie to you. I
have nothing to lose. You are boring If you have
nothing else to talk about, but how terrible men are?
You are boring. If you have nothing else to talk about,
then how terrible women are? Get a hobby, get a sport,
(03:36):
learn something new, pick up a book, for example, show
up as her my book where you can learn how
to become your most positive bitch self. That's right, it's
a whole entire curriculum on positive bitology. If you don't
want to read my book, how about take a course
on how to alchemize your pain into your power. You
(03:57):
can find the Art of Alchemy chorus in the link
in the show notes. How about learning how to transmute
your shadow all the parts of yourself that you deny
into your golden opportunity and key to open all the
doors that you wish to walk through. You can take
the shadow Alchemy course. How about you want to learn
(04:18):
how to take your Power Back? Get the Calling your
Power Back workbook. There are so many things for you
to do, and the links for all that is in
the show notes. To become a more interesting person, Maybe
the problem is not that everyone's trash out there. Maybe
you're boring. Maybe you really need something new to talk about.
I had to stop being friends with certain people because
all they did was talk trash about other people. They're boring.
(04:41):
I want to talk about how I want to build
an empire. How there are so much good in the world.
How to find solutions. If you keep talking about your problem,
you're never gonna find a solution. Oh, I'm sorry, How
do you expect to find a solution? When you're still
broadcasting the same energy as the problem. Oh right, that
does it makes sense? Hello, Hello, wake up and smell
(05:04):
the matrix. What are you doing? What are you doing?
You manifest what you really really want, and you manifest
what you really really really don't want. If you're hating
on men, you're hating on yourself because you are shutting
doors on good, healthy relationships. Good luck, Charlie. There you go.
Good luck, Charlie. If you want to attract a loving relationship,
(05:25):
there are not just millions, there's billions. There's billions of
people on this planet who are good, who want to
give you love, who want to show up as your hero.
The other day I channeled a message for this collective,
and the song that came through was I want to
be your hero. There is someone who wants to enter
(05:46):
into your life or has recently entered into your life,
and they want to show up for you. They want
to show you how much work they've done on themselves,
how much of a provider emotionally, mentally, intellectually, physically they
can truly be. They want to show up for someone,
and that someone is you. You have to realize that. Okay, yeah,
(06:06):
some people suck. Wow, you're on planet Earth. Not everyone's
gonna be great. And guess who's soul signed.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
Up for that?
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Yours did? Yours did?
Speaker 3 (06:16):
Your soul knew that there's going to be duality on
this planet. Your soul knew that there is going to
be polaterity on this planet, and your soul signed up
to learn, develop and grow from all the different energies
on planet Earth. So on some level, your soul wants
to experience what is in your current circumstance and what
(06:38):
you have gone through. If you keep hating on men,
hating on women, you're hating on yourself and you're limiting
your ability to attract a better partner. There are, like
I said, some people who just suck, and then there
are people who are amazing who are going to teach
you how beautiful love can be, who are going to
(07:00):
teach you how to receive love, who are going to
shock you that they are even real. You are going
to experience the type of love where you genuinely appreciate
how divinity is expressed through this other vessel.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
If you want help manifesting love, I highly recommend getting
my magnetizing mugs. I have a whole entire love connection
for divine union. I have two too too. Right here,
every single morning, when you're drinking your coffee or your tea,
that is a moment to manifest, to intend what it
is you wish to call into your reality. Instead of
(07:37):
listening to the news or looking at Instagram, take a
second encode what you're about to put into your vessel,
and then drink it up. This is going to fine
tune you to be the frequency of divine union. If
I've attracted you here, if you are listening, you are
someone who's meant to have divine union in this lifetime.
I have no doubt about it, or else you wouldn't
(07:58):
be here listening right now. Part of your your destiny
is divine union. Part of your destiny is learning how
to shed these limiting beliefs so you can see how
much of a conscious co creator you can really become.
Part of your destiny is realizing that you are the miracle.
You are the magic, and you are the master. If
you want to attract a loving relationship, you want to
(08:21):
stop hating men. First things First, get a hobby, Get
something to direct your mind to. Your mind is always
going to go towards what is loudest in its reality.
If you keep getting trauma experience after trauma experience, because
you keep going out and dating but you're not shifting
your frequency, You're going to compound momentum of negative energies
(08:44):
and entities. If you keep experiencing men who are inconsistent,
who don't treat you well, take a beat, take a moment,
take a seat, because there's something in your energetic field
that you need a cleanse, that you need to shift,
that you need to release before you can change your resons.
I had to go four weeks of isolation. I did
not go out, I did not see people. I would
(09:06):
go out to a workout class, I would go to
yoga and I would work I did not drink. I
stayed in and after four weeks I felt an energy
being released from my body. And when I went back
out there, it was all fine and dandy, and I
attracted better people. Sometimes it's not the people out there.
You actually need to take a beat. You need to
take some time to read a book, to reset, to
(09:28):
shake off some of the experiences that you have been
dealing with, because if you keep going out there with
the same frequency, you're gonna keep getting the same results.
Give your mind something to focus on besides the trauma
that you've endured. Give yourself something to be proud about.
Give yourself something new to talk about. Hey, friends, guess what.
I just tried this new yoga class and it was amazing.
(09:49):
You gotta try it with me. Hey, I just started
reading this book and it's really changing the way I
think you might want to read it too. Introduce your
friends your family to a new way of thinking. Be
a beat of a light. How about that. The second
thing you need to do if you want to stop
hating men, if you want to attract a better relationship,
is to realize your own power. A healed woman does
(10:11):
not hate men, She just doesn't entertain the ones that
aren't on her level. Not all men deserve access to Hugh,
period full stop. When you allow just anyone and everyone
into your field and you don't have a high standard,
you are inviting in low quality experiences. Is it the
(10:34):
fault of the Brads and the Chads of the world
that you don't have standards? Is it the fault of
Joey and Germane that you keep allowing people into your
life that disrespect you? Whose hands is your life in
a mind that lives under a bridge and doesn't speak.
(10:55):
Is that who controls your life? Who controls your life?
Because if you're not living for you, who are you
living for? And what are you doing on the planet
right now? You have to simply raise your standard for
what you're going to allow in your life. And let
me just tell you. Every time, and sometimes I was
scared not gonna lie, But every time I raised my
(11:16):
standard of what I was willing to allow, I got
a better person, place, or circumstance every single time. The
divine does not disappoint. The divine does not disappoint. Say
it with me, The divine does not disappoint When you say, actually, no,
I'm not willing to accept that. The electromagnetic field you
reside within will bend to your will. Your subconscious mind
(11:39):
will blossom and attract someone who is of a higher caliber.
But who has to make that decision?
Speaker 3 (11:49):
You? You?
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Only you can do it. The way I think about
it is, I won't even eat a cupcake. I won't
even put a cupcake into my body. I'm definitely not
gonna put Brad who doesn't have a day job, into
my body. I won't even have a piece of cake.
So I'm not going to allow Chad who is inconsistent
and disrespects me into my body. I limit how much alcohol,
(12:14):
how much caffeine, how much everything I put into my body. Yeah,
I'm definitely not gonna allow some random person into my vessel?
What do you allow? Reflective moment Looking back, I definitely
had times where I would think, why is this person
doing this to me? Why is this person treating me
like this? I always think of Specimen six f four.
(12:36):
By the way, if you're new to this podcast, I
call some of the men that I've dated special men.
Get it. You have to understand that I treat my
life as an experiment, and based on my thoughts and emotions,
it will manipulate the energy around me. So everyone I
come into contact with is basically a social science experiment.
(12:58):
You're also talking to someone who had four hours of
science a day in high school. I was in a
specialized science program women in stem Literally, I even went
to science camp. We don't need to go down that
rabbit hole anyway. Specimen six foot four. Mmmm, he looked
like a Viking. Yes he did. He treated me terribly. Ooh,
that man was a sad individual. He just had. He
(13:21):
had a lot of wounds. But I looked at him
and said, ooh, something for me to fix. That's my
own damn fault. I knew exactly what that was when
I was walking into it. But out of my own wounds,
I said, oh, yes, I want that. Out of my
own people pleaser, martyr wounds. I wanted that. I knew
full well what I was doing. Your trauma is not
your fault, but it is your responsibility to heal. Okay,
(13:47):
So with Specimen six foot four, what I had to
start saying to myself is, you know what, I keep
getting mad at this clown, But why am I not
taking responsibility over the fact that I keep going to
the circus. I don't need to go to his apartment.
I don't need to go meet up with him. I
don't need to text him and tell him that the
sandwich he cooked looks good it looks terrible. I don't
(14:10):
need to do that. Instead of blaming him, why don't
I take responsibility. As soon as you blame someone else,
you're saying that your life is in their hands. As
soon as you blame someone else, you're saying that they
have more power over your reality. Than you do. If
you want to do that, go off. Honestly, it doesn't
affect me. Have fun. It's not going to serve you.
(14:30):
It's not going to help you. You won't get good results.
If you want to be a victim of planet Earth
have fun, I can tell you you won't. You won't.
Here's a fast pass. You won't enjoy it. Take it
from someone who tried it. It doesn't work. It does
not work. Whatever you allow you amplify in your own
(14:51):
field and your life experience. If you keep allowing people
to disrespect you, you're going to keep attracting people who
disrespect you. If you can people allowing them to never
make a plan with you and text you at nine
pm to come over as a booty call, that's what
you're going to get more of. If you never require
them to take you out to dinner and you act
like the girlfriend without being paid with the title of
(15:11):
the girlfriends, you're going to get more of that. You
have to reclaim your power by first of all taking
responsibility and stop going to the circus, and secondly by
having boundaries. Who are boundaries for? Are they for other people?
Are they for the mystical mime? Under the bridge. No,
(15:32):
boundaries are actually for you for what you're willing to accept,
for what you're willing to endure. Did I forget to
mention that fun is your divine right, that pleasure is
your divine right, and you don't only have to learn
through pain. Oh yeah, boundaries are for you to have
a better life experience. I won't entertain inconsistency or weird,
(15:55):
shady energy. I simply don't care. No one is that important,
No one is that important. I came into this world alone,
and ultimately I'm gonna leave it alone. Do I want
love yes? Do I love divine union?
Speaker 1 (16:07):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (16:07):
Do I love relationships yes? Do I love men and women?
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (16:12):
We love everyone. But I'm not stupid, and neither are you.
So I won't entertain something that's taking from me more
than it's giving to me. If you are dealing with
inconsistency narcissistic energies, all that's trying to show you is
you don't choose yourself enough. You're still in a people
(16:33):
pleasing container, and you need to learn how to prioritize yourself.
If you keep day after day getting inconsistent behavior from
the men that you're dating, it's showing you that you
are actually inconsistent with yourself. If men keep ghosting you,
it's because you are ghosting yourself. If they keep abandoning you,
it's because you are abandoning yourself. Look at what they're
doing to you. Because the electromagnetic field is trying to
(16:56):
show you how you're actually treating yourself. The biggest me
will be your intimate relationships. They are going to show
you exactly they're going to amplify how you're treating yourself.
Boundaries aren't for them. It's so you don't lose your shit.
It's so you can remain on your own pedestal. It's
so you can require and then have a higher quality
(17:17):
of life. Boundaries are for you to respect yourself and
to realize that you have the most power over your reality.
Stop positively reinforcing bad behavior by people pleasing and just
doing whatever it is that they want. Because the more
you entertain the guy who's inconsistent, the more you block
off the lover guy who wants to give you all
(17:39):
of his love and be your hero. The more you
entertain the guy who doesn't really care about you, the
more you block off the guy who wants to give
you everything. The more you entertain the clowns of the world,
the less you're going to receive that prince energy. They
are there, but you're not going to be able to
find them. If you're engaging with people who literally don't
(18:02):
care about you, it's not about them being evil. It's
about you saying I have to create proximity from them.
They're showing me how they feel about me through their
actions of disrespect, and instead of me asking why don't
they love me? I'm gonna ask myself why do I
accept this behavior? Flip the script, make yourself the subject
(18:25):
of your sentence again. Instead of wondering why won't they
choose me? Why the hell do you never choose yourself?
Instead of asking yourself, why aren't they attracted to me?
Ask yourself, why am I attracted to someone who literally
doesn't care about me. This has nothing to do with them.
This has to do with you and your own lower
(18:47):
self worth, your low self esteem. This has to do
with the fact that you're still trying to prove to
yourself that you're worthy of love. Your inner child right
now is screaming, So it's time for you to realize
that you're not just your innercher. You're also your wives
inner adults reparent that girl and say, listen, little CC,
(19:07):
you deserve more. And the only reason you're attracted to
someone who's inconsistent is because the caregiver you crave love
from growing up was inconsistent with you. And you're still
trying to master that dynamic by repeatedly impulsively attracting people
who remind you of that caregiver.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
No more.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Instead of trying to convince people to choose me, I'm
going to choose myself. What's going to bring me joy?
What can I improve in my life? What do I
have dreams of? And how can I make that my
new north star. Give your mind something to focus on
so that you're in control of your life. Otherwise your
mind will find things to worry about. If you don't
(19:50):
have something to positively obsess about that's going to empower you.
Like reading a new book, learning a new language, mastering
your body, mind's spirit, your mind will find something to
worry about. In the same way you wouldn't positively reinforce
your dog's bad behavior. Don't positively reinforce their bad behavior
(20:10):
or yours, because then you're only going to elongate your
own trauma. Right now, right here, We're gonna make two shifts.
The first shift is shifting from our inner child of
why won't they love me? To your wise inner adults,
Why don't I love myself enough to leave? Why is
it so hard for me to choose myself? The wrong
questions will never give you the right answer, So flip
(20:31):
the script. The second shift you're gonna make is from
Mary Magdalen to Lilith. Mary Magdalen is a very loving energy.
It's the role of endlessly forgiving, leading with love, washing
of the feet, being in service. If you are consistently
being mistreated, you might have been in an overact of
Mary Magdalen energy of giving, give and giving giving, and
(20:53):
you actually need to give to yourself. So what are
you going to switch into Lilith? Lilith was actually, according
to Jewish folklore, Adam's first wife, and Lilish was banned
from the Garden of Eden because she decided that she
did not want to allow Adam to get on top
of her. She wanted to be on top, and when
he said no, she left the Garden of Eden and
(21:16):
she went near the Dead Sea. And then God sent
a couple of angels to try to convince her to
come back, and she said no. And when she said no,
she was basically banned from the Garden of Eden. Lilith
is an energy who stands up for herself, who speaks
up for what she wants, who says no, actually I
don't want you on top of me. I want to
(21:37):
be on top. Actually no, I don't want to be
in this space. I want to be over there. You
want me to come back, Well, you're not giving me
what I want. So the answer is no. I want
you to make a conscious shift. From Mary Magdalene, the giver,
the more martyr, the more people pleas are, the lover,
the washing of the feet, to Lilith. No boundaries. I
(22:01):
know what i want. I'm getting what I want. The
divine does not disappoint me. I'm focused, I'm energized. I'm
on my own pedestal from inner child to wise inner adults.
I have boundaries. I respect myself. I understand that the
higher my standard, the better quality experiences I'm going to get.
Something that I've spoken about is what I call the
(22:22):
Harvard principle. These Ivy League schools, they have a really
high standard and a low acceptance rate. Apply that to
your own life. Have a high standard for what you're
going to allow and a low acceptance rate for bs.
When you see someone can't give you what you want,
that's not a moment for you to try to prove
your worth. It's a moment for you to realize, oh,
(22:42):
they're incapable, but someone else will be capable. Not everyone
can afford Chanel. Chanel isn't like, oh my god, this
is so embarrassing that they can't afford me. They're like, no,
we want someone else, someone else who can afford me.
Chanell knows if that person can't afford the bag, another
person will. If someone can't give you what you want,
(23:03):
someone else will. There is something called the boyfriend effect,
where people say that when a girl gets into a
relationship with a guy, the guy gets better looking, better style,
But when a girl gets into a relationship, she ends
up either gaining or losing too much weight, they say,
looking frazzled all the time, doesn't have enough time to
do or make up her hair. And the way I
(23:25):
have kind of faced this because I literally thought about
this and I thought that makes me not want to
have a boyfriend. I know this is so little, but
that really did cross my mind, And if you were
like me, you might have thought about that too. I
just want to say, having the right boyfriend, the right partner,
actually allows you to have like this glow up because
(23:46):
someone is giving you so much compassion, so much love,
so much attention that you feel so safe and grounded
on the planet that you actually glow up even more.
When I thought about people spreading this negative narrative, the
boyfriend effect, when you get into a relationship you get uglier,
I literally thought to myself, I'd rather be single and pretty.
(24:06):
I'm sorry, I don't know what that makes me. It
makes me honest, I'll say that, but yeah, I'm not
trying to be an ugo. So I had to consciously
say to myself, I've reject that narrative of the matrix,
and I had to start telling myself that when you're
in a relationship with the right person, you actually have
a glow up. Now, when you are in a relationship
(24:27):
with the wrong person, you do get anxiety. So that
can cause weight gain, weight loss, it can cause hair loss,
it can cause allergic reactions. When I was in a
relationship for a while that was not the right one,
I was breaking out in hives all of the time.
So being with the wrong person can have a negative
effect on your physical body because you're spending so much
time in your sympathetic nervous system, your fight and flight response,
(24:50):
which means that you're going to be pumping out cortisol
and that's going to have a negative effect on your appearance.
So being with the wrong person can negatively affect how
you look. But let's not call that the boyfriend effect,
because that did affect how I looked at relationships, and
I want to just put that as a side note.
So when you're with the right person, it does make
you prettier, it makes you healthier, it makes you happier.
(25:12):
Being with the wrong person, whether it's a friendship, a coworker,
that's always going to have a negative effect on you
because of your nervous system. You have to start looking
for evidence of what you want to experience. If you
want to experience a good man, look for good men
in your life. Is there a trainer at the gym?
Is there an uncle? Is there a brother? Is there
(25:34):
a friend? Is there a father your friend's dad? Is
there a coach? Is there any man in your life?
That you look at and say, Damn, that's a good father,
that's a good husband, that's a good dad, that's just
a good man. Because the more you highlight and emphasize
the positive qualities that you like in the masculine energy,
(25:55):
the more you're going to attract that towards you and
when you notice it, have a moment of appreciation. Wow.
I really love how that coach talks to the women
that he coaches. He really gives them space to show
up as their most authentic self, whether they're being emotional
having a day, or whether they're feeling really strong that day.
(26:17):
He really allows them space to just be them. Or
I really love how my friend's boyfriend is sweet with
her and sensitive with her, but yet can be really
masculine when he needs to be. I will tell you
I'm in a relationship right now with such a good man.
I've dated other good men. They just weren't my man,
but they were good men. Think about men you dated.
(26:37):
Maybe they weren't the one, but you're like, yeah, they
were really kind, they were really nice. They showed up
for me if I needed something, they were there for me.
I recognize good people everywhere I go because it makes
me feel good and it makes me happy. Start to
recognize the good men that are in your life, or
even just knowing that I currently am in a relationship
(26:58):
with a good man can help you realize that there
are still good men out there. I met this man
about a little over two months ago. All those narratives
that there is no good men left, well, that's a
lie because I just met one two months ago. The
sentiment that there are no good men period, that's a
lie because I'm dating one right now. The sentiment that
there's no masculine men anymore, that's a lie because I'm
(27:19):
dating one right now. The sentiment that there's no emotionally
available guys, that's a lie because I'm dating one right now.
That's actually one of the first things I said to
my boyfriend is WHOA you are so emotionally available. I
was actually shocked that when I went on our first date,
I already deleted my hinge, and so did he, even
(27:40):
though we never spoke about it. He was still so
ready for commitment and a relationship. Now, mind you, before
we met, who deleted hinge?
Speaker 1 (27:48):
Me?
Speaker 2 (27:49):
I did. On eleven eleven, November eleventh, I deleted hinge
and then on January eleventh, I re downloaded it and
we matched. I knew I could not deal with any
more men, because if I did, I was going to
start to believe the negative things that people said about them,
because not every single relationship or experience I had with
a man was roses and daisies. Some of them were
(28:11):
more difficult, Some were facing me with a lot of
shadow work that I had to do, and I understood
that it was my responsibility to take a beat and
do that shadow work so I could stop attracting the
same experiences. You know what you need to do. You're
hearing these words, and you know what you need to do.
If you're feeling burnt out, delete the apps, stop dating,
(28:31):
and work on yourself. Take the shadow Alchemy course. That's
exactly what I did before I met my current partner.
I knew I needed to take a break, so I did,
and once I took a break and worked on myself,
I then did attract a better person. They are out there.
Start looking for them, because right now, if you're talking
about how all men are trash, that means you're also
(28:52):
looking for men who are trashed. Your particular activating system
is going to do the filtering for you. And if
you're thinking about how all men are tracked, that's what
you're gonna notice. That's what's gonna be highlighted to you.
So you have to start looking for what it is
you want to find. When you start looking for what
it is you want to find, the funny thing is
yet end up finding it. Think about the observer effect.
When scientists observed an electron, it's solidified. It condensed from
(29:17):
a wavelength into a three D particle. This means that
what we look for we will find. When the scientists
looked away, the one solid particle went back into wave
length form. What you look for will be condensed in
your reality. If you're looking and thinking and talking about
how all men are trash, that's what you're gonna find.
(29:37):
But if you look, if you think, if you feel,
if you talk about how there are good men out there,
that's what you're going to find. That's just how your
brain works, It's how the electromagnetic field works, it's how
your subconscious mind works. Let's say you're thinking, CC, I
don't know any good men even look at couples, and
I don't love this, but I'm grasping for straws here.
People even look at people who you think a really
(30:00):
good relationship online and say, I love the way that
boyfriend does this, I love the way that husband does that.
I don't watch like family bloggers or people like that,
so I don't know what's going on on the internet
these days, but there's gotta be someone. So find someone
you like and go for that. If you can't find
anyone in your reality that's a good man, you can't
find someone on the internet that you think is good
(30:21):
to their girlfriend or their wife, call on Jesus, call
on Archangel Michael, call on Archangel Raphael, and use even
a loving ancestor as someone to give you energetic security.
There was a time in my life where I was
just fed up with guys in the masculine energy, So
instead of relying on them in the physical form, I
(30:43):
just started working with Jesus every single day, and knowing
that there was this masculine energy around me that was
supporting me, directing me, protecting me all the time. It
really just gave me that extra blanket of security and
safety that I was wanting from a physical guy, and
I do think ultimately that allowed me to attract a
(31:05):
man who did give me safety. If you want to
attract safety, it's sort of annoying, but you have to
broadcast it before you actually get it out there. So
if you want to attract a masculine partner, start with
working with divinity. Date the divine In the couple of
months between November eleven and January eleven, what was I doing.
(31:27):
I was working with Brother Jesus. I was working with
Archangel Michael. I was working with my divine team of
light beings. I was working with Saint Germain and the
Violet Flame to burn up seeds of karma. I was
doing the energetic work because there's really no pill you
can take to cleanse your energy. You just gotta do
the work. So strap in, take a beat, and do
(31:49):
the energetic work of the shadow work of transmuting your
pain so you can actually attract different experiences. You can
blame men for the rest of your life. It's not
going to change what you attracts. I will remind you
that all the courses are in the show notes. Thank
you so much. Your past does not have to equal
your future. It does not have to equal your present,
(32:10):
and your power doesn't lie in your past nor your future.
It lies in this moment right here to me. It
was really helpful to realize that some of the more
I could label them negative experiences I've had with men,
I now on the other side of that experience, realize
those were destined, Those were here by soul contracts because
(32:34):
I needed to learn through those experiences. My human self
CEC would never have chosen what I've experienced with some men.
I would have never chosen that. CC didn't choose that,
though my soul did. My eternal soul that has had
many lifetimes and that will have many more lifetimes, chose
to have certain men come into my life and trigger
(32:57):
me and a little bit of traumatize me so that
I can learn to develop and grow. I've made peace
with that. I truly know that in my bones that
that was all happening for me, and on some level
I chose it. I am so sorry if something negative
or traumatizing or something really hurtful has happened to you,
(33:18):
and I do want to take this moment to just
honor everything that you have been through, and I want
to honor that you're still kicking and screaming, and I
want to honor that you are still here and I
want to honor that, even though shit has happened, you're
still trying so hard to heal, and you're still trying
so hard to show up as your best self, and
(33:40):
you're still trying to just maybe take the next breath,
and you're still trying to just take the next step,
and you're still trying just to wake up and get
out of bed and go to work. I want to
honor that because that is not easy. That is not easy,
and most people kick the bucket. Most people don't care.
They let their trauma dictate how they're going to live
(34:02):
the rest of their life. And you're not. You're not.
So I know if you're listening to this, then you
have enough will within you, You have enough momentum within
you to realize that maybe, on some level, your soul
chose is to give to you the momentum you need
to move forward and to build the life of your dreams.
I know that on some level, there is an ancient
part of your soul right now that's itching to break
(34:26):
to break down the barriers you feel other people have
put you in, to break down the box you feel
other people have put you in. There's a part of
your soul that maybe's listening to me right now and
knows that this is your truth, that you're more than
what has happened to you. You're more than what you've experienced,
(34:48):
and you have this new found maybe anger or resentment
or hurt that you know that you can take this
pain and use it as fuel to create. You ate
that business, or to do the workout, or just to heal,
or just to breathe, or just to go to work.
You can use your pain and transmute it into power.
(35:10):
You are an alchemist. You have the ability to transmute
energy into anything you want. And that's why you're so powerful.
That's why your soul has led you here today. You're
not listening to this by accident. You're not here by
some random weirdo circumstance. No, this is my divine design
and you designed it. Your soul designed that you would
(35:31):
be listening to me right now. Your soul design that
you would be here so you could get gifted these
codes to up level your life. On some level, maybe
you're realizing that your human self will never be able
to logically understand what you've gone through. Your human self
will never be able to logically connect the dots. Your
human self might not ever be able to understand why.
(35:54):
But what if that's not the point of what has
happened to you? What if the point isn't understand why.
What if the point was just to experience it so
you could cultivate momentum within your body to birth a
new cycle, to birth a new you, to become even
more powerful. What if that pain is just momentum to
(36:16):
push you forward. You don't have to agree with me,
but all I invite you to do is open up
and become curious. What if? What if, on some sol
crazy level, I actually chose this through a soul contract
(36:37):
so that I could become more powerful. I was in
an energy class ones and the teacher Anton was telling
us that this woman was in a really abusive relationship
for most of her life, and when she got out
of it and started to heal and did past life regression,
(36:57):
she actually found out that in a past life she
was her current abusive partner's abusive spouse. So in a
past life she abused this soul, and then in this
life she had to pay karmic debt to that soul.
I'm not saying that to you. I'm not saying that's
what you've been through. I'm not saying that even applies
to you. The reason I bring this up is because
(37:21):
we have to realize that we are not made in
a vacuum. We have past life energies that follow us
into this one. And that means that, yeah, sometimes there's
karma we got to pay up to other souls. That
means that, yeah, we do choose certain experiences to push
us to grow, develop and learn. It means that we
(37:46):
are more than just this current incarnation. I invite you
to become curious instead of furious at what you have experienced,
because in curiosity, you can grow, you can change, and
you can try to better. I highly recommend if you
are dealing with more difficult energy is to join the
(38:06):
Art of Alchemy course because it's going to help you
transmute some of those seeds of karma, but also any
lower vibrational emotion that maybe you're having trouble working through.
I want to remind you that as you're listening just
to this podcast, you are changing on a cellular level,
that you are changing on an energetic level, and walking forward,
(38:27):
you are never going to attract what you have because
it's scientifically impossible. As you shift in vibration, as you
listen to these words, as you learn more about yourself,
your energetic signature is shifting, So what you attract must
shift its energetic law. We have to remember that we
don't just attract what is like a vibration to us.
(38:48):
We attract based on our own beliefs. So if I
believe that all men suck, all bosses suck, that's what
I'm going to attract. I want to remind you some
bosses do suck, some men do suck. Some dogs are violent,
some women are annoying to me, they are. I want
to remind you that in general, yeah, some people are
(39:12):
not great, but when you generalize that to a whole
entire gender, you hurt yourself. If I allowed past experiences
with women to dictate how I saw all women, I
would be in big old trouble. I had friendships where
people did not really treat me that well. Women did
not treat me well. They low key bullied me, they
(39:35):
isolated me, they let me out. If I was to say, well,
that's how all women are, I would never be able
to have any friends that were women ever. If I
allowed my negative experiences with some of the men to
dictate how I dated in the future, I would never
have been able to attract my current partner. Some chocolate
tastes bitter, some dogs are violent, some men are trash.
(39:59):
But stop saying it's all of them, because that is
limiting what you are able to attract. You have to
open up your thresholds for what you're willing to receive
and what you're willing to believe about the world. If
you don't believe that there are good men out there,
start to open yourself up by using what if statements.
(40:21):
What if there are really good men out there? What
if I could attract a partner that is super kind,
super gentle, and yet super masculine. What if my husband
is the hottest, wealthiest, funniest man out there? Have fun
with this. If you want to play a game with
(40:42):
yourself or friends, do the what if game. What if
I attract a partner who is everything I could want
and more?
Speaker 3 (40:48):
What if the.
Speaker 2 (40:49):
Universe blesses me with the best person I could even
conceive and think about? What if my relationships just get
better and better and better and better and better. What
if when someone would say that all men suck to me?
Or when I would see something I didn't like in
a man, I would just say to myself, my husband
would ever do that. That man might be doing it,
(41:10):
that man might be a cheater, that man might be this,
But my husband, Nope, My husband is the sweetest, the kindest,
the most masculine man out there. My husband would never
do that to me. So I don't care if I'm
dating someone in a relationship with someone. I'm just looking
at someone. If they do something I don't like, I'm
going to say my husband would never do that, because
I'm not going to hurt my ability to attract the
(41:32):
best of the best of the best of the best.
And by the way, whatever you have experienced, if it
has left your life, just know that it gets better.
It gets better. If something was divinely removed from your life,
it's because there's something better out there. Your past experiences
with men are there for you to learn from. They're
not there to dictate what your future is going to
(41:54):
look like. Your past with men and who you have
dated is there for you to develop from. To you
as a jumping off point, not as a mirror for
what you're going to attract in your future. Let your
past be your past and let it rest in peace.
It has nothing to do with where your going. It
gets better from here. That's how the universe works. It's
(42:17):
constantly rerouting. You think about your GPS. If you go
off track, what does it do. It reroutes you back
onto the correct path. It doesn't bully you about your
past and say you have to go back to where
you start to know. It just reroutes you onto another
road to get you where you want to go. If
you know that you want a better partner, you want
better relationships, then that's what you're going to get. But
(42:38):
you might be rerouted. You might have to go through
a breakup. You might have to say no, you might
have to set a boundary, you might have to shift
your beliefs, you might have to take the art of
alchemy course. But you're gonna get there. Enjoy the season,
enjoy where you're at, because it gets better from here.
As always, the sparkling me honors of sparkling you. I'm
sending you so much love. If you've not yet gotten
your copy of show Up as Her, be shore to
(43:00):
get that so that you can elevate your frequency and
therefore your wife. If you did enjoy the book, be
sure to leave a positive review on Amazon. And if
you're enjoying this podcast, it really helps the podcast if
you can share it with your friends and loved ones
and if you can leave a positive review on Apple
Podcasts and Spotify. I love you so much and I'll
see you in the next one.
Speaker 1 (43:28):
Cancer can
Speaker 2 (43:46):
Cancer, Cancer
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