#21 - Anchors for the days that try to take you under

This isn’t a list of clichés or Pinterest quotes.

It’s the real, messy, practical stuff that got me through some of my darkest times. In this episode, I share the points I jotted down, the reminders, habits, and mindset shifts that helped bring me back to earth when everything felt too heavy.

These are the things I still come back to, because they work. Not because they’re magic, but because they’re simple, doable, and real.

If you’ve been feeling scattered, overwhelmed, or just a bit lost, maybe something here will be the thing that helps you hold on.

Thanks for tuning into That Makeup Gal! If you loved what you heard, be sure to hit subscribe so you never miss an episode. And if you’re feeling generous, drop a review—it helps more people find the show. Connect with me on Instagram @thatmakeupgal.pod for more behind-the-scenes moments, tips, and all the good vibes. Until next time, keep being unapologetically you bb!

Episode Transcript

SPEAKER_00 (00:03):
Jesus, I lost the microphone.
We're off to a good start.
Fucking hell.
Anyway, g'day folks.
Welcome to that makeup gal.
I don't even fucking rememberthe intro.
And I've sworn twice in 22seconds.
So, welcome.

(00:24):
Hope you stick around.
I'm Stevie and I'm that makeupgal and today I am going to
structure this episode a littlebit differently and I'm very
excited.
So I didn't plan it the way Inormally do.
It kind of came to me from aplace of needing to or wanting
to document the stuff that hasactually helped me.
And I started writing down allof these like simple dot points

(00:47):
that I have really learnt, likepoignant dot points throughout
my life.
call it, healing journey.
And when I started reading themback and kind of elaborating on
them, I was like, this shit kindof matters.
So yeah, I thought I would sharethem.
Not as someone who's healed.

(01:07):
I've said that a million times.
I do not believe that I am, ininverted commas, healed.
I don't hope to ever be becauseI hope to continue to learn and
to continue to get hurt and tocontinue to get, you know,
better rebuild time and timeagain from all of the
experiences and lessons andsometimes they're not so good

(01:28):
but you know I I think that wordis something that people tend to
chase and then I'm not going togo into the world of fucking
leaders and coaches that youknow perch themselves on an
ivory tower as if they arehealed I will never be that
person because I don't ever wantto be anyway that was a
digression let's get the fuckinto it So these first few

(01:52):
points are going to be the onesthat I identified to be sort of
around self-worth, identity,unlearning perfectionism, all of
those things that kind of get inthe way of progression.
So the first one is when yourworth isn't up for negotiation,
everything changes.
I pretty much spoke about thisin the last episode about how

(02:15):
standing in your power is is astatement that gets made really
loosely by a lot of people, butthe crux of it is learning what
your worth is, learning thatthat is an absolute
non-negotiable, that you have toget clear on that because if
you're not, what the fuck is,what are you building?
If it's not built around yourentire belief system and your

(02:41):
self-worth, what are youbuilding?
You stop performing, you stopshape-shifting, you stop begging
for crumbs, and you start movingfrom conviction and not
desperation.
I feel like that kind of feedsinto the dating thing again, but
that breadcrumb theory where...

(03:03):
Most of the time, one person issort of feeling like someone's
throwing bits and pieces outthere and you're just scrambling
for the information.
No, no.
Again, I spoke about that in thelast episode where people tend
to actually project that as theperson who's, in adverted
commas, breadcrumbing.
And instead of going, why am Iactually still scrambling for

(03:26):
them and not just looking at thefucking crumbs on the ground and
going, ew, cunts, sweep them up.
Like...
I don't take breadcrumbs, mate.
I take a whole bakery.
The next one.
Your past is information, notidentity.

(03:46):
You can use your past to formyour identity if you choose, but
it does not have to be.
Your past is an informationvessel that you can use to
create the next chapter.
You learn from that.
You build from that.
What happened in a chapter isnot your whole character.

(04:06):
You are allowed to outgrow it.
Speaking of outgrowing, it'sokay to outgrow the person that
you were once proud to become.
It's okay to look back at photosand think, fuck, I thought that
that was the pinnacle of it.
It's okay.
You don't have to resent that.
Growth is not linear.
Growth is a scale.

(04:27):
And you're always going to lookback at the past versions of
yourself and hopefully haveevolved into a better, more
learned, more understandingperson.
That's the point of growth.
I mean, it's not always how itgoes.
There's ups and downs and roundyrounds.
But it is important to outgrowthings.

(04:48):
Because we want to evolve.
We want to expand.
And that means sometimes, youknow, the girl or the guy or
whoever that you createdthinking that that was the
milestone, it's okay to not havethat as a milestone anymore.
And in fact, be way ahead of it.
Be proud of that.

(05:09):
You are not behind.
You are healing in a world thatrewards burnout.
Now, this was a personal onethat often comes up for me.
And I believe it probably willtime and time again because I am
actively and alsounintentionally doing things
quite differently to the worldaround me, at my age anyway.
And I believe in my heart ofhearts that age is just a thing.

(05:36):
It's just a fucking number.
We're not anything without ourexperiences and the things that
shape our identity andexperiences.
And I'm the sort of person thatchooses to learn from those
experiences, good and bad.
And being at the stage that I amnow often means that I look at

(05:58):
the world around me, people thesame age as me, people in
business the same time as me,and you do have that comparative
snap of...
Is that how I'm supposed to bedoing it?
And then I pan out and I'm like,wait a minute.
Why is the way that I'm livingnot celebrated as much?
Because there's always thispity.

(06:19):
I think I've mentioned that inone of the early episodes.
A client's mum.
It happens all the fucking time,to be honest.
It's always the way.
And it's always the conversationstarters for older generations.
When they see somebody orunderstand my age, it's like,
oh, how many kids do you have?
None.
Do you have a partner?
No.
But you know what I do fuckinghave, Sandra?

(06:40):
How long you got?
No.
But it is that moment of why isthat the pinnacle of what
deserves to be celebratedwhen...
If I told you all of thosethings and I did have three kids
and I did have a business of 15years and I did have a husband
and he worked away so I had tomaintain the household and pay

(07:01):
all the bills and I'd be afucking shell of myself.
How is that the thing thatactually makes people want to
involve themselves in aconversation with you and
determines if I'm interestingenough to have a conversation
with because the fuckingconversations tend to come to a
grinding halt when I say no tothose things like I'm some kind

(07:21):
of fucking failure of a womanand it's like ask me about how
much of an auntie I am ask meabout how I'll walk into a
burning fucking building andsave you and your cats and I've
got no other response you cancall me at 3am I will be the
person and the friend and theauntie and the cousin and the
daughter that shows the fuck upbecause I can why is that not

(07:42):
the thing that's actuallycelebrated and the fact that you
know Yeah, I'm not burnt thefuck out.
I'm not doing 250,000 hours aweek and running 14 businesses
and have, why am I exaggeratingso much?
Even if I had two businesses andsome staff, I would be a shell
of myself.
I have actively chosen to livewithin my means to allow me to

(08:07):
expand and evolve and learnthrough the fucking, the things
that life dished up.
And I learned that it's really,it's quite hurtful actually,
that maybe I would be morecelebrated if I was pushing
myself to within an inch of mylimit, you know?
What?
So no, you're not behind.

(08:28):
You're not late.
You're just choosing somethingmore sustainable for you.
The timelines and the thingsthat society created, I say it
in almost every fucking episode,can suck a chuppa chup.
You know, fuck.
Go away with that expectation ofwhat it looks like to be

(08:49):
successful and what it lookslike to be, you know, where you
should be.
Fuck off.
What do you mean?
Okay?
I talk to business ownersmultiple times a day and the
ones who in the eyes of societyare successful and wonderful and
they're doing so well arefucking miserable.
Not all the time.

(09:10):
Most of the time.
And I speak for that.
I could push myself and mybusiness and I could.
Some people would look at thatand go, why aren't you?
Because I don't fucking want to.
And if I said that to someone,they'd go, what?
You're meant to.
You're actually meant to.
No, actually.
You're meant to live everyminute that you get gifted.

(09:33):
You're meant to be able to enjoythe time that you get here
because this is fuckingtemporary.
And a lot of people forget thatwhen they're on the chase for
what society tells them theyshould be chasing.
And yeah, I just want to remindyou that that's a load of shit.
So fuck the timeline.
You're not behind.
Just do you, babe.
Can you tell that one waspersonal?

(09:54):
No.
They're all very personal.
Next.
Who would you be if you didn'tfear disappointing anyone?
That version of you that you'vealways dreamed of seeing, but...
hasn't really come to thesurface.
Think about why.
And often there's someone thatpops into your mind that is

(10:18):
subliminally telling you no oryou should be doing something
differently.
Just ask yourself, who would yoube and how would it look if that
fear of disappointing someonewasn't there?
Firstly, get rid of them.
If it's family, like, sure, justput a strong boundary in place
because, again, this life ismeant to be lived for you.

(10:41):
That's the only thing thatmatters because then everything
around you falls into place.
If you're living according tothe world around you and how
they expect you to show up, youare heading for a fucking bin
fire of disappointment.
That might happen in two weeksor two years or 22 years, but
please, you'll get to that stagehowever long it is and I hope
it's sooner rather than laterbecause if it's 22 years down

(11:03):
the track and you're looking ata steaming pile of shit that you
did in the...
hopes that you wouldn'tdisappoint Aunty Karen, you're
going to be pretty fucking sadabout the time that you lost.
So just pause in this actualmoment and ask that question.
Do you need to put someboundaries in place?

(11:24):
Do you need to have a hardconversation with yourself,
because I hope you're doingthat, about why it is that that
holds so much importance in yourlife?
Sometimes Putting boundaries inplace hurts so fucking much
because when things happen inyour life that shed perspective,

(11:47):
no, that's not the word I want,that offer perspective.
Mine was my dad's dying.
Dad's?
I only have one.
Dad dying.
I still can't say thatcomfortably.
Una memento.
Yeah, anyway, I've spoken aboutthat being the actual, you know,
line in the sand in my lifebecause it gave me that ability

(12:12):
to see everything through a lensthat illuminated all of the
things that I had pushedthrough, neglected within
myself, you know, put otherpeople's needs and wants above
my own.
I can't I'm not holding thatmirror up anymore because I

(12:33):
stood in the shadows of all ofthat for 20 fucking years.
And now I actually have so muchperspective that I don't even
owe an explanation as to what isgoing on because you had full
access and now you'reuncomfortable because you don't.
That's not my problem.
When people have full access toyou and all that you offer and

(12:56):
all that you bring and yourheart and your advice and your
ability to repair situations andfractured relationships and
whatever it is that you wereoffering the situation and then
suddenly something happened andyou retreated and pulled back
that access, the people that areuncomfortable with that and make

(13:19):
it an issue aren't your friends,aren't meant to be in your life.
Because people who see you actlike that and see you retreat
and see you pull back and seeyou withdraw go, girlfriend,
what's going on?
I love you.
I'm coming over with ice creamand you're going to tell me what
the fuck's going on because wedon't have fractures in this

(13:40):
relationship and obviouslysomething's going on and we're
going to talk.
And even if you don't want toopen the door, I'm sitting on
the other side of it.
they don't take that personally.
They don't take things thathappen in your life and go,
well, fuck you, you know?
I remember having that exactconversation with a friend and I

(14:03):
ended up saying to her, why areyou taking my life personally?
Why am I having to explain myactions and decisions and
movements as if it has anythingto do with you?
Like, I love you, but what thefuck are you on about?
Let me.

(14:25):
Let me live my fucking life.
And if that's not in accordancewith yours, okay.
And then she burst into tearsand it all went downhill and
whatever.
Like, of course, but what?
That was one of the most hurtfuland empowering situations I have
ever fucking found myself in.

(14:47):
Because I, for the first time inmy life, looked in my own
mirror, really, and went, nah,nah, we are not fucking doing
this anymore.
Yeah, and as I said, you realisethat the people that love you
aren't disappointed by you.
They're not disappointed by youractions, even if you did fuck
up.

(15:08):
It's like, okay, that was reallydumb, but I love you and we're
going to get through it.
People can be disappointed indifferent levels, but...
If you are the one that is soscared of disappointing
somebody, instead of actuallyjust doing the thing, and if it
disappoints them, you canaddress it and go, oh, fuck,
sorry about it, didn't mean to.
Or, oh, well, that's yourdisappointment to carry now, I

(15:31):
guess.
I'm just living my life.
So ask yourself that.
Who would you be and what wouldit look like if you didn't fear
disappointing anyone?
And as I said, the things thatcome up or the people that come
up, maybe elaborate on thatwithin yourself.
And lastly, forgive yourself forwho you were when you were
surviving.
Forgive yourself for who youwere when you were surviving.

(15:55):
It's not a nice thing to gothrough.
It's not a nice version ofyourself.
Nobody wants to reflect on thefucking rotting corpse that was
me, to be honest.
When I was in the thick ofgrief, I had no other capacity.
I'm not proud of that.
Actually, no, fuck that.
I am proud of that because Isurvived.

(16:17):
I don't like looking back atthat because it makes me sad.
It makes me sad to thinkabout...
Hold on.
It makes me sad to think abouthow much my heart was hurting.
Hurting doesn't even come close.
It's survival.
And few people really understandthat.

(16:40):
But if that resonates...
Forgive yourself for who youwere when you were surviving.
You did what you had to do withthe tools that you had.
You may not have even had thetools in the space that you were
in.
And it's hard to find new toolsor even old tools when you're in
that space.
That version of you deservescompassion, not shame, not

(17:03):
resentment.
You didn't have any control ofthe world around you.
I say that in every fuckingepisode.
and sometimes the world aroundyou flips you on your head.
And instead of pushing againstit and going, oh, well, that's
out of my control, you just haveto stay on your head for a bit.
Let the world swallow you.

(17:23):
Let that situation swallow youand survive.
But you do what you have to doto actually move through that.
And for me, this was where allmy lessons happened because I
knew...
That if I didn't find, notmeaning, if I didn't figure this

(17:46):
out and rebuild piece by piece,strand by strand, it was going
to destroy me.
I have never experiencedanything like I did in the early
days of when my dad died.
That feeling of the brutalreminder of how fucking fragile

(18:08):
life is.
And that's a really beautifulthing, but it's also a really
fucking scary thing when thatreminder comes with something
like that attached to it.
Life is impermanent.
Life is fragile.
Nothing is guaranteed.
Literally fucking nothing isguaranteed.
It's wild.
It's a wild concept to actuallyfathom.

(18:30):
And especially when literallyone day they're here and the
next they're not.
It's wild.
And so personally, I was like,okay, we need to put this
fucking heart of yours to gooduse, Stevie.
And we need to learn and we needto grow and we need to survive
this.
And yeah, unfortunately, notunfortunately, for me, that

(18:52):
meant that I do retreat becauseeverything became really, like
I've said, crystal clear, but italso became hyper painful and
painful.
exaggerated almost like I felteverything times 10,000 and
trying to put on that mask whenI was around anybody and you

(19:12):
know I didn't want to speak alot of the stuff that I was
feeling into existence but Iknow I needed to feel it and a
lot of people don't understandthat because they think let's
just talk and when you're goingthrough something like that it's
like I don't fucking want to Iactually don't even want to
exist in this moment I amliterally trying to just get
through the fucking day so thattomorrow I can wake up and it's
one less day of this.

(19:34):
I'm one day closer to hopefullynot feeling it this deeply
anymore.
So yeah, forgive yourself forwhatever it was, whatever it
looked like, whatever it lookedlike.
Shit gets ugly sometimes andhumans are, humans are humans.
Fuck.

(19:54):
It's actually wild how manypeople expect so much from
humans and then get disappointedif they don't handle a situation
the way that, again, societythinks that they should.
I often use school as theexample of this because, I mean,
obviously they're kids and youdon't have a deep understanding,
especially in Mardai.

(20:16):
Mental health andneurodivergence and all of that
stuff wasn't overly understood,I guess.
It was spoken about.
But yeah, the kids that werethrowing chairs, the kids that
were rebellious, the kids thatyelled at their teachers, the
kids that told their mathsteacher to fuck off or whatever,
they were often chastised fordoing that.

(20:39):
And if you think about it, Whatwas their life like?
How can we expect somebody,especially a kid in this
example, but like, let's go backto the broader example, how can
we expect people to react in anyway at all when we're only as
good as the examples that we'vebeen given and sometimes people

(21:00):
weren't given examples at all?
It's just another example of howbeing a human is really hard and
learning is really difficultwhen...
you're learning for the firsttime because often as adults we
get given situations in our workin our you know life love life
whatever it is that we haven'thad to face before how can we

(21:23):
expect that we know how tohandle something that we've
never seen before that's crazy alot of the time we're going to
get it wrong the first time orthe second time or the 17th time
we're humans just Forgiveyourself for whatever it was.
If you have the tools to be ableto learn from that and develop
better skills and hopefully thenext time that a situation like
that comes your way, you'relike, I've seen this and I'm not

(21:46):
repeating that pattern.
But forgive yourself.
So the next section is aboutlike the physical things that
happen, your nervous system, thetriggers, the things that happen
within your body.
I personally thought that I, youknow, was able to think my way
out of pain.
I just spoke about that.

(22:09):
I go deep within this littlebrain cavity of mine.
But my body was rememberingthings that I thought, you know,
I dealt with.
And eventually it startedspeaking louder than my
thoughts.
My visceral responses to thingswere fucking intense.
Like, there were times whencertain situations I was like,

(22:31):
all right, I'm cool, I'm cool,I'm cool, I can handle this.
We know what to say, we knowwhat to do.
And then my body would literallystart vibrating.
And I'm like, I can't speak.
I can't...
I'd look at my friend and belike, I don't...
Like, give me a minute, I can'tfucking function right now.
And, you know, that's what Imean when I often say...

(22:51):
anxiety isn't the buzzword thateverybody tends to use these
days.
Anxiety is a visceral responsefor a lot of people.
Feeling anxious is completelyfucking different to having an
anxiety disorder.
And that is what often shows upfor me anyway, because I have
anxiety.
I may my whole life, I don'tknow, but I manage it pretty

(23:15):
well.
But there are times when, as Isaid, my mum gave me a book just
recently.
called The Body Keeps the Score,or Holds the Score.
And it's exactly that.
It's about the fact that you canthink you through something and
understand the what's, thehow's, the happenings, and then
your body goes, mm-mm, mm-mm.

(23:41):
I remember, this was a fair fewyears ago, I was in my spare
room at my old house with mythen partner and we were going
through something pretty hecticwith my family and I was putting
together a really intensedocument and we were sitting on
the floor and he'd kind of leftme to my device I think he was

(24:02):
making dinner and I was like I'mcool um but he came in and he
was like are you okay what'shappening and I'm like yeah yeah
yeah I'm good I'm good I'm goodand I just remember looking up
at him and seeing this look inhis eyes and he bent down and
just held me and he was like ohmy god you have to stop This is

(24:25):
ruining you.
And I'm like, I'm fine.
I promise.
I am.
And he was like, Stevie, please.
Like, I'm begging you.
This is too much for you rightnow.
It was.
I didn't stop.
But I often think back to thatand think about what it was like
for him to witness that andwitness the absolute unfolding

(24:46):
of me and watching me pushthrough something that my body
was literally...
forcing me to listen to and yeahI didn't but I guess that's why
I that's probably the biggestreason why when grief entered

(25:07):
the chat because up until thenyou know I thought I'd had my
bad days and then dad went andfucking flew off the earth and I
was like okay so We either movethe way we did last time and get
that result and let your bodyfucking suffer and your mind
suffer and you push throughsomething that's really hurting

(25:30):
you or you rest into this andyou actually allow yourself to
fucking heal.
And yeah, it's been a journey,but here we are.
Anyway, let's get into it.
So the first one is peace feelsboring when you're used to
chaos.
When your baseline has beensurvival, safety feels

(25:52):
unfamiliar.
And you know that anxious babiesdon't like unfamiliar things.
Actually, humans, it's often anuncomfortable place for a lot of
people.
And when you are used tosomething being one way, it
actually goes back to the pointthat I was making about, you
know, when you put theboundaries in place, when people
have had access to a certainversion of you and then you

(26:14):
change that, it makes peopleuncomfortable.
It makes you uncomfortable whenthat change is forced upon you.
You're like, wait a minute, Ican continue doing it this way
because it feels good and I knowhow it works.
And I, well, you think it feelsgood.
Or I can change it because thatactually needs to happen, but
it's gonna feel uncomfortablefor a little bit.

(26:34):
It's meant to, change is meantto.
If it doesn't feel safe, it'snot meant for you.
And I know there's people going,oh, do it scared, do it, shut
up.
We're not talking about doing itscared.
We're talking about things thatfeel unsafe for your body when
they do the things that I wasjust talking about.

(26:55):
When it responds viscerally, youstop in that moment and go, hmm,
what's that?
You don't need to rationalisethe vibe.
You don't need to go, yeah, butit was just a hectic thing.
It's fine.
It's fine.
If your body says no, fuckinglisten before your mind talks
you out of it.
And history repeats itselfagain.

(27:17):
And you find yourself in thatvortex of anxiety and pain and
discomfort because it'sfamiliar.
Fuck that.
Do the unfamiliar.
Being triggered by something isyour soul saying, this still
hurts.
It's another coined term thateverybody uses at the moment and
people are sick of hearing andseeing.

(27:37):
Triggered.
I'm triggered.
Like, it's an overused thing.
It actually was something thatis used in psychology for PTSD.
And the triggers there are whathappens when you have a
situation trigger yourpost-traumatic stress and
therefore, you know, flashbacksor the responses that you have.
It's actually a really seriousthing.

(28:00):
When that happens, it isliterally your body going, this
isn't safe.
It still hurts me.
And you stay in therapy and youdo the things that you do to
actually break through thosebarriers that are causing those
triggers.
Triggers are just breadcrumbs toburied grief or buried pain.
They're not enemies.
They're invitations to actuallytake to your therapist or to

(28:23):
your doctor or whoever it isthat is helping you work through
these things and going, so thiscame up and I thought I had
dealt with that but clearly Ihaven't.
Can we talk about this because Idon't want to keep carrying it.
We don't ignore the things thattrigger us and we don't make it
someone else's fucking problem.
Fault, sorry, I should say, notproblem.

(28:43):
Actually both.
But as I said, I think in thelast episode where a lot of the
times when we experienceemotions or responses to
emotions or situations, peopletend to blame the external
source or the externalsituation.
Like, oh, the person you wereinvolved in triggered me, so
it's their fault.
No, no.
No, like, yeah, the situationcould have been fucked, but look

(29:06):
at you and look at the situationand we don't get triggered, in
adverted commas, by things thataren't within us.
Because if we're at peace andwe're, you know, we've got all
that shit on lock and someonedoes something fucked, we go,
are you okay?
Who the fuck says that, doesthat?
Are you right?
And walk away instead of going,what the fuck, he triggered me,

(29:29):
fuck him, blah, blah, blah,blah.
or her, whatever.
Like, no, no.
They're invitations to actuallygo, we still have some work to
do.
That's why, you know, for mepersonally, dating was an issue
for a long time because therewere a lot of things that I had

(29:50):
suppressed throughout my verylong relationship that came up
when all of a sudden I had to bevulnerable with strangers.
And I had no idea.
So I was like, okay, all right,I'm actually not going to put
myself in this situation.
I'm just going to take thisentire package to my therapist
and go, help me fucking unpackthis.

(30:12):
Help me continue to unpack thisbecause I cannot carry this in
my backpack anymore.
I didn't make it the fault ofthe other people that I was
involved in or the ones thatreminded me of my triggers.
They're mine.
They're mine.
So yeah, listen to them.
Our body doesn't tell a shit orshow a shit for no reason.
That your triggers are teachers.

(30:33):
Whoopsie, just hit themicrophone, sorry.
Yeah, they're your teachers.
They're not enemies.
Well, they can be your teachers.
They're fucked.
They sometimes feel awful.
I had a situation actuallyyesterday where I was on the
phone to my doctor and theperson that I was speaking to,
they kept over-talking me and Iwas trying to say something and

(30:54):
I just gave up.
I was like, and they just keptlike yapping and finishing a
full paragraph when it was clearthat I was really trying to say
something.
So I just shut down and Iliterally was like, I'm just
going to go silent.
And then after they finishedtheir what felt like seven

(31:15):
fucking hour tirade, I was like,it doesn't matter, bye, and just
hung up.
And I felt like shit becausewhen I hung up, I was like, that
person was just doing their joband they might have been anxious
as well.
Like they were trying to explainsomething to me and maybe it
wasn't what I wanted to hear.
And because I got put in asituation that made me feel like

(31:38):
I wasn't being heard, my triggerwent, fuck you, you don't want
to hear me, you don't care aboutme, you don't value anything,
I'm going.
And so I sent an email beinglike, I'm really sorry.
I tried really hard to fuckingregulate and I failed and I
projected and I'm really sorry,you didn't deserve that.

(32:00):
And they emailed me straightback and they were like, we
totally get it.
It's so fine.
But, you know, that was mine andit's a teaching lesson for me.
to take accountability, but alsothey're not...
They're teachers.
Those situations make you go,what was that?
And for me, in that situation, Iwas like, OK, so you felt
invalidated.
Whose is that?

(32:21):
That's not them.
That's not theirs to hold.
They were just doing their job.
Work on why you felt invalidatedwhen someone was in their own
world, because you don't knowwhat was happening for them when
they were on their tirade.
Everybody's complex, so...
Yeah, it was a real learning onefor me because when I took
accountability and actuallywent, I'm really sorry that I

(32:41):
projected you didn't deservethat.
That was my shit, not yours.
I hope I didn't ruin your day.
Of course I didn't.
Fucking hell.
I was not mean at all.
I just, typical crab, I justfucking pull my head into my
shell and this little cancerianbaby just goes, no thank you,
I'm hiding from the world.
Bye.
And sometimes I don't even saybye.

(33:03):
Often I don't.
It's the Harry Houdini.
It's the smoke bomb.
Bye.
I'm out of here.
Yeah, just don't shut the dooron the things that make you
flinch because, you know, we cancall it a trigger or we can just
say, fuck, that made me a bituncomfortable.
They're the things that aregoing to offer you the lessons

(33:23):
that will open...
to the expansion they will offerthe expansion rather and open
different doors that's how welearn that's how we identify
things that we like or don'tlike and it's just part of life
so another perfect segue thenext things I want to talk about

(33:44):
are actually projections otherpeople and maybe the art of
letting go, like letting go ofthat responsibility of holding
other people's expectations.
What someone else thinks of meliterally has nothing to do with
me anymore anyway.
It did, it certainly did.
It fucking dictated every singlemove that I made in my past, but

(34:08):
not anymore.
I keep going back to my mum'sanalogy.
It's so strange.
People probably think it's theweirdest thing.
A pen.
It's the simplest thing.
Someone's holding a pen.
It's full of their shit.
It's full of their projections.
It's full of their trauma.
And then they hand it to you andgo, that's yours now.
And you look at it and go,thanks.
It's really nice.
I like how it writes.
But no, it's yours.

(34:29):
Take it back.
It's as simple as that.
I've got my own.
I actually have a pencil case ofmy own.
Shit-filled pencils and pens.
So I'm good.
You keep it.
And also, every projection has amirror in it.
You can look into the mirror ofsomeone else's projection and

(34:50):
go, hmm, I don't think I'm goingto take that on.
If you're projecting, you lookin that fucking mirror and catch
yourself out like I didyesterday and go, uh-uh, that's
ugly.
We're not doing that anymore.
That's not fair and that's notthe kind of person that we are.
That's a projection.
Take accountability for that inthat fucking moment and move on

(35:12):
because that's, again, that'snot how we move as humans.
That's not how we should move ashumans.
I really like this one.
Emotional maturity looks likeletting people misunderstand
you.
It's about being okay with nolonger clearing your name in
every room you're not in becausepeople will project.
They'll assume and that hasnothing to do with your truth.

(35:36):
The sooner you realize thateverything that someone else
does is theirs, the closer youget to fucking peace basically.
It doesn't matter.
what is happening in someoneelse's mind.
Their perception is always goingto be different to the next
person, the next person, thenext person.

(35:56):
It might be a similar variation,but it's never going to be
exact.
So just let it fucking happen.
Let it be.
You stay true to who you are andyou know that if you needed to,
you can be like, well, that'snot true.
But if you want to believe it,cool.
I'll be over here doing mything, knowing my truth.
You become so unbothered by thethoughts and perceptions and

(36:20):
beliefs of other people thatyou're like, I'm good because
I'm fucking solid, you know?
And speaking of rooms, if youalways need to explain your
heart, you're in the wrong room.
I read something recently thatwas about like neurodivergence
and over explaining and theirneed to over tell a story.

(36:43):
You know, we often findourselves in situations where
we're like, yep, yep, yep, yep,yep, yep, yep.
This happened, this happened,this happened, this happened
when I was seven.
And oh my God, what about thisand this and this?
And then you leave and you'relike, oh.
Why did I have to say all that?
And it's, you know, tale as oldas time.
Anyway, I read this thing thatwas like, we don't overshare
because we want to.

(37:04):
We overshare because we thinkthat we're more interesting with
context.
And I was like, oh, my fuckingGod.
That's the mirror that I need tofucking look in.
I don't know.
I don't owe anyone anunderstanding of my context.
But I'll take that.
And I'll pop that in myemotional backpack because that

(37:25):
is exactly why I over-explain.
Because I do believe that I makemore sense when I tell my whole
story and when I give context.
But it doesn't feel good.
And you know that the people whoare in your life that are rock
solid, that love you andunderstand you, don't need that
context anyway.
So if you're over-explaining,you're in the wrong room.

(37:48):
Get the fuck out.
Again, speaking ofaccountability, accountability
feels uncomfortable.
Blame feels easy.
Choose wisely.
I basically spent a wholeepisode, maybe two episodes,
talking about the importance ofaccountability and blame.
I actually think I have anepisode, accountability versus

(38:10):
blame.
Do I?
Maybe.
Maybe I dreamt it.
Nope, just needed tocross-check.
It's accountability, identity,and moving forward, my episode.
But, you know, potato, potato.
Anyway, as I say, accountabilityis the key to fucking
everything.
Blame buys time.
Accountability buys growth.

(38:30):
One feeds the ego, the otherfeeds your future.
Like, what do you want tochoose?
Blame feeds the ego becauseyou're going, I'm not in the
wrong here.
You're fucked.
You did that.
I just responded to youractions.
Can be true sometimes.
We do respond to people'sactions.

(38:51):
But the accountability has to bethere to look at those actions
and go, I'm actually notresponding to that because
you're fucked.
Bye.
It's as simple as that.
Not okay.
I'm going to blame you and makethat part of my story and make
it part of my law and make itpart of every other man that
comes in my way because you'reall the same.
No, I'm going to takeaccountability for the fact that

(39:13):
I didn't do anything wrong hereand you're just a piece of shit.
So, bye.
Completely unaffected.
A little affected because, youknow, I let you into my orbit.
But moving on.
Accountability lets you leaninto the things that are...
and potentially laying dormantand will continue to come up in

(39:35):
every interaction that you have.
Dating, friendships, work,everything.
Accountability is the key tolooking at that response to the
external and going, okay, I'vedone this before.
I'm actually going to rewritethat because I don't like those
actions.
But for some reason, I keepfinding myself in interactions

(39:55):
where I experience the sameactions.
And lo and behold, my responseis the same.
So if I want to rewrite thisnarrative, perhaps I need to
change my response.
And that starts withaccountability and going, why am
I responding the way that I amin the first place?
And how do I fix that?
And again...
watch those people never enteryour life again because the

(40:17):
boundary is so strong thatyou're like, nah, motherfucker,
I've seen you before.
I am so not interested, bye.
And this one is a real pearlerfor every human that you have an
interaction with.
Most people aren't emotionallyunavailable.
They're emotionally avoidant.

(40:39):
big difference it's not thatthey can't it's that they won't
and you can't heal someone'sunwillingness with your over
giving you can't go into asituation and go oh he's not
capable it's just the way thathe is I'm going to give give
give what you think that's goingto heal the situation it's just
fueling the fact that he's justgoing to not do it even more or

(41:00):
there I should say like youcan't heal someone's
unwillingness with over givingthat's not how shit works You
can heal someone's fuckingunwillingness by flipping the
bird and going, see you cunt.
Take your unwillingness totherapy and stop projecting it

(41:22):
onto fucking people that youthink are going to fix you.
Thank you so much.

(41:45):
that is so yours, I don't evenneed to respond.
So as somebody who absolutelylived in the people-pleasing
space and allowed everybody fullaccess to me and then chose what
version I was going to projectto the world even though it
wasn't my truth, I learnt thisthe interesting way, not the

(42:09):
hard way.
And I used to think thatprotecting my peace made me
cold, which is why I justcontinued to put things out
there.
Put myself out there, I mean,not things.
Like, put myself in situations Ididn't necessarily want to be in
or find myself in conversationswhere I was giving and, you
know, probably leaving reallyfucking deflated because I was

(42:31):
offering a lot of clarity insituations that I was getting
absolutely fucking nothing from.
But upon reflection, that'sexactly why I was there.
Anyway, turns out it just makesthings clearer.
Boundaries just make thingsreally fucking clear.
And that is so gorgeous.
Not everyone deserves a frontrow seat.

(42:53):
Just continue doing what you'redoing, saying what you're saying
and keep those fuckingboundaries strong.
And everything has a reallysweet way of letting things just
fall into place.
So yeah, the first one isobviously about boundaries.
And understanding thatboundaries aren't walls, they
are invitations to meet you withcare.
Boundaries don't mean you havenot got access to this ever

(43:15):
again.
It means, no, I'm pretty carefulwith this and I know what I need
to make me feel comfortable andif you can't offer that, then
no, you don't have access.
It's as simple as that.
It's not a nasty thing.
You're not pushing people out.
You are teaching them how tocome closer safely.
That's not a fucking bad thing.
That's actually one of themost...

(43:36):
unbelievably, beautifully humanthings that you could do and
that your friends and familywould want you to do.
How beautiful to cherish whatyou are with a boundary and to
have the people around you torespect that boundary.
Let yourself get to a spacewhere silence speaks louder than
words.
Not everything requires aresponse when you are healing

(43:58):
and it's not avoidance.
I had to learn this the hardway, to be honest.
It's discernment.
When you learn to sit indiscomfort without reacting, you
actually become really fuckingdangerous in the best and most
beautiful way.
I've got a personal example.
It's to do with someone that wasconnected to my dad.

(44:19):
And recently they reached outand I have absolutely nothing,
nothing in my heart to say tothis person.
Actually, that's not true.
There are a few things, but I'vecome to understand that even
those, they don't deserve accessto.
See, isn't it funny the thingsthat actually still trigger a

(44:44):
response in you?
I know that this response ismine, but I also know where it
comes from.
And there's a lot of...
emotional discomfort around thisparticular situation, but it's
mine.
I don't need to speak it outloud into their world to have
them understand something that Idon't want them handling in the
first place.
We get to make the decision asto what we allow other people to

(45:06):
handle within our lives, andthat's not one of them.
This person messaged me a fewweeks back and said that they
were in town and that they'dlike to catch up.
And so I didn't respond becauseI'm like, fucking in what world?
And then they emailed andrepeated the question, but

(45:27):
instead at the end said, let meknow either way.
And I read it to my family andI'm like, let you know either
way.
You mean you can't understandthat someone would not want to
speak to you?
Again, that says a lot aboutyou.
If I do not respond and youaren't able to look at the
surrounding circumstances as towhy I'm not responding, that's

(45:49):
on you.
Now, this is coming from someonewho absolutely will hand on
heart acknowledge that I retreatwhen I'm processing.
I don't respond to messages.
I feel like I do.
Fucking three weeks passsometimes with it feeling like
three days and I take fullaccountability for that.
However, the people in my lifethat I do miss messages from...

(46:11):
know that there is no bad bloodand that there's nothing to take
personally because there'snothing that's happened.
They don't ever go, I expect tohear from you in your pain.
I expect it because I need it.
I need to know what you'redoing.
I need to know your response.
They fucking don't.

(46:32):
They go, she'll talk to me whenshe needs to because we're good,
we're strong, we're solid.
And this particular situationwith the let me know either way
was like...
No, I'm not letting you know anyway because you are the kind of
person that I don't ever want tofind myself in a room with
again.
Someone that is capable of thethings that you are capable of,

(46:54):
I do not want to share a momentwith.
And it's taken me a long time toprocess that because of how
close my dad was with thisperson.
And that doesn't make me a badperson because I've got a
boundary in place that my daddidn't.
There are some people on theplanet that you just don't owe a
response to and silence shouldspeak that because I think I

(47:17):
mentioned this in a previousepisode about the fact that if
you aren't the kind of personthat is emotionally able to look
at your participation in asituation and go, oh, I can
understand why there's a riftthere.
I can understand why there's animbalance in our relationship
because yeah, I get it.
If you're not able to do that, Idon't want a fucking bar of you.

(47:41):
Emotional intelligence andemotional awareness is two of
the most important things in mylife.
And if you are neither of those,I have no interest in sharing
space with you.
Sometimes you don't have to fixthe vibe.
You just need to leave the room.
Peace isn't a group project.
If it costs your clarity, it'stoo much.

(48:03):
Get out.
Like I said earlier, get thefuck out of the room.
If you're going in there andfeeling anxious and feeling
overwhelmed and feelingunsupported, get out of the
fucking room.
Don't expect that the room'sgoing to cater to your
discomfort.
Move.
It's sacred work.
It's important.
It's personal.

(48:23):
Protect it.
Not everybody gets to see it.
Not everybody gets to understandit.
So the next things I want totalk about are the clarity and
the choosing skills.
of the discernment and themoment things shift.
The shift always came for me inthe silence.
Like when the noise stopped, Iwould hear the question

(48:44):
underneath it all.
Like, is this really right forme or am I just used to it?
That came up a lot when I wassaying no to a lot of things
because honestly I couldn't.
when people were like, can Icome round or do you want to
come round?
And I was just like, I haven'tshowered in two days and I've
cried so much that I think Iburst a blood vessel.

(49:05):
So respectfully, no.
And those questions came when Iwas saying no to the things that
I used to say yes to becausethere was discomfort there.
Like I was used to just showingup and doing the things and
being in rooms that...
Thank you.

(49:37):
Ironically, the house that Iactually received the phone call
in.
And I always really struggledgoing back there, but of course
I pushed through and I showed upand I went there and I had the
panic attack in the car outsideevery fucking time.
And the last time that I wentthere, I had somebody there say,
so what's been happening withyou, Stevie?
Nothing?
And I was like, what?

(49:59):
Actually, yeah, I've beenactively not...
unaliving myself every daybecause my heart is irreparably
fucking different and I don'tknow who I am anymore.
And on top of that, I'veactually started an online store
And a podcast.
And I've relisted every singleitem on my website and done the

(50:23):
backend editing of that.
And I've listed like 15 Googleads.
I worked on the analytics of mywebsite, learnt all that myself
because I have no money becauseI haven't been able to work
because I've been surviving.
But yeah, nothing.
I'm just really hopeless.
And yeah, that was the momentwhere I was like, I think this

(50:45):
is the shift.
I think this is the shift.
I'm not in a room wheresomeone's saying, you are
fucking amazing.
And to actually just double downon that, I had a message from a
friend on my birthday a fewweeks back.
And this particular friend, Ihave missed so much in her life.

(51:05):
I'm talking I missed an entirepregnancy.
We caught up for coffee, whichfelt like a two-week gap.
And I finally caught up with herand she walked in and she was
like eight and a half monthspregnant.
She's like, surprise.
I'm like, what the fuck?
She hadn't put anything onsocial media because she hadn't
told me.
That day, she literally put upon social like, surprise, I've

(51:27):
been keeping a secret.
Like, I don't know if it was todo with me, but yeah.
I have missed so much, but shejust loves me unconditionally.
And she said in my birthdaymessage that, I am forever
inspired by your strength toshow up in this world as
vulnerable as you are.
And, you know, I love you and Ilove your heart.

(51:50):
And I read things like that andI'm like, fucking hell, that's
what it is to celebrate a humanin every chapter of their life.
Not make them feel like anabsolute fucking failure because
they're experiencing somethingthat makes them a little bit
different in this moment.
that makes them appear as ifnothing's happening when life is
still really lifing and I shouldbe celebrated for the fact that

(52:13):
I'm still fucking doing it, youknow?
Let the things shift, basically,is what I'm trying to say.
If it feels confusing orconfronting, it's misalignment.
Just call it exactly what it is.
It's misalignment and you needto get the fuck out of the room,
basically.
And that's OK.
And another thing that Ithink...

(52:35):
really rang true over the last12 months is that people can
only meet you as deeply asthey've met themselves.
I learnt this through grief andI found this journey personally
because when I experiencedgrief, when I experienced the
death of dad, actually.
I've referenced my best matebefore a million times in this

(52:55):
particular situation, but justfor the people who haven't heard
the episode, one of my bestmates who also lost her mum,
ironically on the same date thatI lost dad, six years prior, I
believe.
said to me life is about tobecome abundantly fucking clear
to you life is about to make somuch sense things are going to
shift into a space that youdidn't know possible and the

(53:18):
people people are going to makesense in a different way people
who have experienced pain aregoing to stand out to you and
the people who haven't are goingto be so far from your fucking
radar that you won't have a sayin it Basically, in a nutshell,
saying you see the worlddifferently and you understand
people differently.
And people who have experiencedthis are different.

(53:38):
They are.
They see and feel things sofucking differently.
There's this beautiful depth topeople that have...
yeah experienced life on adeeper level than the fucking
surface and unfortunately thepeople who only see the surface
become so uninteresting to youwhen you've seen life through

(54:00):
this lens and that's where shitjust starts to slip away because
if they're disconnected fromtheir own heart they're never
going to understand yours andthat's not rejection it's
limitation That's the boundarystuff that we were talking
about.
It's limitation.
It's as simple as that.
Now, this is one that I fuckinglove.

(54:22):
You don't need to vibe your wayinto clarity.
Ask the question.
Watch the reaction.
Sometimes you don't even have toask the question.
You can just ask the question inyourself.
Just watch.
You don't have to twist yourselfand bend yourself to find the
clarity in a situation.
You just stand there and ask andwatch.

(54:44):
Energy is one thing.
Directness is another.
Clarity lives in asking the hardthings and watching.
Whoops, I hit the microphoneagain.
What they do with it.
Watch how it unfolds.
Watch them squirm.
Watch them hold you.
This is the part where the pennydrops.
Watch it drop.

(55:05):
Learn from it.
Learn to name misalignment.
Walk away from the fog and don'tmistake intensity for chemistry
or history for expectations.
You know the, they've been in mylife for 25 years.
I can't let that all go.
Yeah, you can.

(55:25):
When things align, you can.
It's hard, but that'sdiscernment.
So I'm going to close with a fewof the things that I think if I
could go back and hand myselfsomething to hold on to when
everything felt loud or too muchor too painful, I think it would

(55:49):
be these.
Healing doesn't mean forgetting.
It means remembering withoutpain.
You know those fucking stupid...
rose-coloured glasses and theflying butterflies and the
people that are like, grief isjust all the love that has
nowhere to go.
Fuck off.
No, it's not.

(56:10):
Grief is really fucking ugly andgrief is one thing.
Grief is literally a situationthat happened that you are
yearning because it changed.
It was one way and now it isn't.
That's grief.
That hasn't got anything to dowith love that has nowhere to go
now.
The healing...
is the part that teaches youwhat you now do with the love
that is you know maybemisdirected or can't go to

(56:35):
somewhere because they're deadlol sorry dark the memory stays
but it no longer controls thenarrative that's freedom that's
what healing is that's whathealing a situation is it's the
painful parts of it so thatyou're left with the memory of

(56:55):
what once was and that's theessence of fucking life because
if you hold on to the fact thatsomething isn't here any longer
you're just going to be in for areally miserable life because as
I always say every single thingon the fucking planet or make it

(57:17):
a And the sooner that you acceptthat and that, you know, you
grab onto the fact that, yes,you're in charge of your own
healing and sometimes you'regoing to have to heal through
things that really fucking hurtyou.
But you're not healing in orderto forget the thing that
happened or to erase the pain.

(57:39):
You're there to changeperspective and to find the
freedom within that so that youcan look back at that and no
longer be hurt or triggered orwhatever.
You don't need a new life.
You need a new lens.
And that lens often comes fromshit that really hurts you.

(58:00):
But it allows you to see thingsso fucking clearly and
differently.
And if you take the power thatcomes with that new lens that
gets gifted to you, oh, my God.
It's hard.
But just look through it.
It's confronting.
It's only hard because it'sconfronting, right?
As we were talking about, thatdiscomfort and the familiar

(58:22):
things are often more, inadverted commas, comfortable.
But they're not really.
They're not.
They're just familiar.
And the sooner that you rememberthat, the better.
So look through that new lensand know that you're going to
see a different fucking world.
You're going to see a newperspective and things are going
to fall into place in a way thatyou probably didn't expect them

(58:42):
to.
But just let it.
And remember all the things thatI literally just said about
boundaries, about living true toyourself, about only having your
wants, needs, desires, whateverat the forefront and letting
that be the director of themovement through the shit that
hurts you.
And yeah, things will start tomake a whole pile of sense

(59:08):
eventually.
So I really hope that maybe oneof these stuck with you or...
made you pause or gave yousomething to contemplate or just
to to think over um I writeeverything down I'm a I'm a big
advocate for journaling and justbrain dumping onto the pages in
front of you mum told me aboutfree writing fucking probably 10

(59:30):
years ago and I love it it'schaotic as heck but if you've
never heard of it free writingis basically in a moment of pain
or chaos or busy mind just graba pen and a paper like some
paper and get brain dumping putit all on paper all All of it,
every single thing without eventhinking.
It's this idea that sometimes weoverthink and that gets in our

(59:54):
way of actually processing itand getting it out.
Purging your mind in a way thatyou're not in control of is so
fucking freeing, especially as aserial overthinker over here.
I'm always in control of mythoughts, which isn't a bad
thing, but at times, sometimesyou've just got to let go of the
reins and just fucking let yourhand just drag it all out of

(01:00:18):
your mind.
Put it all on the paper, as Isaid, and process it however the
fuck you need to.
For me, I am a big believerin...
the cleansing power of burningand I love burning the pages of
my journals and there are neverever negative intentions

(01:00:40):
attached to it.
It is purely a release.
It's the way, it's my way ofhonouring what I put onto the
paper without any intention ofneeding to read it back and
Yeah, allowing that to be thefinal closing moment of what I
put on the paper.
But as I said, it's totallypersonal.

(01:01:01):
It's up to you.
If you want to keep the journal,if you want to read it, if
that's your vibe, then do it.
This is totally personal.
But I just...
I hope...
Even just one of you is feelinginspired to do some writing or
to do some reflecting or maybeone of the points that I made
resonated and you can justponder it wherever you are.

(01:01:22):
Because the truth is healingisn't about becoming someone
else.
It's about remembering who youare underneath the noise.
And if the noise needs space tobe heard, that can sometimes be
on the pages of a big old braindump session.
It doesn't have to be anexternal scream.

(01:01:43):
It can be screaming to yourfucking pillow.
Oh my God.
Screaming to your arm ditch in acar.
Beautiful.
They're more soundproof than youthink.
There are actual therapists outthere who really, really
encourage scream therapy.
It's incredible what it does toyour body.

(01:02:03):
I'm not going to go therebecause it's actually a
therapeutic module and I am notmodule, but practice.
And I don't like talking aboutthings that I'm not credited in
but from an experienceperspective oh my god one of my
friends and I a few years backum I would take her to one of my

(01:02:23):
favorite spots on the coast andwe would just sit on the top of
the cliff and we would say whatwe had on our heart before we
threw it because they were notmassive rocks and obviously it
was safe to do it.
It was very safe, very, verysafe.
It was not into the oceanbecause the thought of like

(01:02:46):
hitting a little fishy with therock actually makes me want to
die.
So we would throw them just ontothe rocks beneath us.
It's hard to explain if youdon't know the place that I'm
talking about, but it's justfucking, it's cliff.
And yeah, we would say what weneeded to say and then scream if
we needed to.

(01:03:06):
And throw the rock.
And it's like this emotional butalso physical release.
And yeah, whatever it is thatyou need to do to let the words
become a release, do it.
Just do it.
The noise has to have a place tobecome silent.

(01:03:27):
And that's on you to figure thatout.
So I guess what I want to leaveyou with is this.
It's not about being lessemotional or more together,
whatever that even fuckingmeans.
It's about remembering who youare underneath the noise, like I
said.
The noise of expectation.
The noise of performing.
The noise of social mediatelling you that you're either

(01:03:48):
too soft or too much or notenough or, you know, too old,
too young, behind or everythingall at once.
Whatever.
But underneath that...
There's someone who has alwaysbeen enough, who didn't need to
earn belonging, who didn't haveto hustle for their worth.
And if no one's told you lately,they're still in there, even if

(01:04:10):
you've forgotten about them oryou've forgotten how to hear
them or you've forgotten how tolisten to them.
You're so focused on theexternal world and everything
that's going on chaotically thatyou've forgotten.
Just try to remember.
Take what resonated today andsit with it.
Let it move through you.
Let it meet you in your timing,whatever that is, wherever that

(01:04:32):
is.
And if something's stirred,that's probably worth paying
attention to.
Like I said, grab the pen, grabthe journal, pour it all onto
the pages or speak it out loudif that's your vibe.
Just let it and listen to it.
So yeah, I'll leave it there.
Let's wrap a little bow in thatand call it episode 21.

(01:04:57):
Don't know what the title isyet.
Thank you for being here andthank you for listening, not
only to me, but to you,hopefully.
Hopefully this has stirred somekind of thought up in you and
yeah, I hope it offers somereflection.
Anyway.
I'll catch you next time.

(01:05:18):
Bye.