The Art of Not Losing Your 💩 Shit: How to Handle Annoying People

Ever feel like pulling your hair out because of a difficult person?

Turn those frustrating interactions into powerful opportunities for personal growth with Dai Manuel on this episode of The 2% Solution!

Dive into the psychology of anger and frustration as I break down why we get so riled up and, more importantly, how to keep your cool even around the most challenging people. 

Learn five practical strategies to remain composed: pausing to breathe, acknowledging your feelings, shifting your perspective, using "I" statements, and setting clear boundaries.

I’ll share a personal story about "Dumper Dave," a coworker whose constant negativity tested my patience daily. 

Through this tale, I'll show you how these techniques transformed my relationship with him and boosted my emotional well-being.

As we wrap up, I invite you to join our podcast community. Share this episode with friends who might need a little emotional support, and don't forget to engage with us on social media.

Together, we can turn stress into strength and thrive in every aspect of life.

Resources:

1. American Psychological Association
2. Harvard Medical School
3. Journal of Applied Psychology

TEXT ME here - Have a question? Comment? Feedback? I’d love to hear from you.

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A Message from Dai, host of the 2% Solution Podcast:

Hey there, you fantastic listener! 👋

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Your reviews? They're like high-fives to my soul. Your shares? They're spreading more joy than cat videos on the internet. Subscribing? You're officially the coolest in my book.

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Keep being the amazing, 2%-improving rockstars that you are.

🌟 Stay fabulous, stay tuned, and stay 2%! 🚀

Love, laughs, and much gratitude,

Dai M.

P.S. I'm primarily active on Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn. Feel free to connect and start a conversation. If you're searching for inspiring, motivational, educational, and healthy living content, check out my over 1500 articles at DaiManuel.com - I enjoy writing, okay? lol

Episode Transcript

Dai Manuel (00:08):
Hey there, wellness warriors, welcome back to
another episode of the 2%Solution.
I'm your host, diamond Well,and we're diving into a topic
that hits close to home for lotsof us.
You ever wonder what you shoulddo when people are just pissing
you off.
Like really strategies for whenpeople just seem to suck

(00:29):
Because, let's be honest, we'veall been, whether it's a
difficult goal worker, maybe achallenging family member or
just a frustrating stranger.
Sometimes people just reallyknow how to push our buttons.
But fear not, because todaywe'll explore practical
strategies for managing youremotions, maintaining your
composure and turning theseinteractions into opportunities

(00:53):
for personal growth.
Let's take a deep breath andlet's just get into it.
Let's start with a bit ofpsychology.
Anger and frustration arenatural emotions.
According to the AmericanPsychological Association, these
feelings are responses toperceived threats or stressors
Pretty straightforward.
But when someone pisses you off, your body reacts with a

(01:17):
fight-or-flight response, whichcan make it hard to think
clearly and I think we'll allagree, pretty darn challenging
to stay calm as well.
But here's the kicker While wecan't always control what
happens to us, we can't controlhow we respond.
A study from Harvard MedicalSchool found that people who
manage their anger effectivelyhave lower stress levels and

(01:39):
better overall health.
So how do we get there?
Let's dive in to some practicalstrategies.
Number one pause and breathe.
The simplest and most effectiveway to manage immediate anger
is to pause and take a few deepbreaths.
This helps activate yourparasympathetic nervous system,

(02:01):
which calms you down.
Nervous system which calms youdown.
Just three deep breaths canmake a huge difference and might
be just enough of a bufferbetween losing it and really
losing it Now.
Number two acknowledge yourfeelings.
It's okay to feel angry,frustrated or just PO'd.

(02:23):
Acknowledge your emotionswithout judgment.
This helps you process themrather than suppress them.
Number three shift yourperspective.
Try to see the situation fromthe other person's point of view
.
This doesn't mean you have toagree with them, but
understanding their perspectivecan reduce those feelings of

(02:46):
anger.
Number four and this is onethat I have to remind myself and
I'm going to invite any menthat are listening to this to
really pay attention to.
Number four Use I statementswhen addressing the issue.
Use I statements to expressyour feelings without blaming
the other person the issue.
Use I statements to expressyour feelings without blaming
the other person.
For example, I feel frustratedwhen meetings start late because

(03:10):
it affects my schedule Insteadof you always start meetings
late, right?
Uh yeah, I can relate to thatone a lot.
Okay, so that use of Istatements pretty important.
And then, number five setboundaries.
If certain people consistentlypiss you off, it might be time

(03:31):
to set some boundaries.
This can mean limiting yourinteractions or communicating
your needs.
So just to recap the fivepractical strategies for
managing your emotions Numberone pause and breathe.
Number two acknowledge yourfeelings.
Number three shift yourperspective.
Number four use I statements.
And lastly, number five setboundaries.

(03:54):
Let me share a quick story.
I remember a time it's goingway back I had a coworker who
just was always negative.
You know for for, withoutrevealing any names, I'm just
going to call him dumper Dave.
Okay, and dumper Dave'snegativity was driving me,
literally and figuratively.
I, I, I pretty much ran up thewall.

(04:15):
Every meeting, every email,every phone call.
It was like a dark cloud, kindof reminded me of Eeyore, is
that, if you remember Winnie thePooh and some of his friends?
But there was Eeyore, which isalways, that's just that, downer
donkey, right?
Well, dumper Dave was a regularEeyore.
I decided to try the strategies.

(04:36):
Well, not all of them, but afew of the ones that we just
talked about, in particular theI statements and shifting my
perspective.
I remember pausing and taking afew deep breaths after getting
triggered by some stupidstatement he said, and I
acknowledged my frustration.
Then I approached him, dumperDave, with empathy, literally
trying to understand why theymight be feeling the way they

(04:59):
are so consistently.
And what turned out?
They were going through a reallyhard personal time and this had
been going on for literally afew months.
It was a personal relationship.
That few months.
It was a personal relationshipthat was struggling.
It was coming towards its ends,new separation, and it's
interesting, right, because asmuch as we think that we get to
know the people we work with,sometimes some people, well, we

(05:19):
just don't really know them.
Even if we try to take time, ifwe're not opening up, we don't
create the space to get to knowsomebody.
And it was a valuable lesson tome that I was completely
oblivious to the going-ons inthis person's life.
I wasn't really taking theinitiative to try, nor were they
opening up to share, and fairenough, right.
But this became reallychallenging because I would see

(05:42):
this repeating itself in otherareas of my life, and so I think
this is one of the most tryingthings is when we discover that
we have a certain way of dealingwith certain things in certain
areas.
So, as an example, when I startto feel triggered, a little bit
upset, I react.
I react very quickly.
It's like it goes from cool tocrazy and it annoys me and I

(06:04):
know it really bugs the peopleI'm closest with.
So that idea of just pausingand breathing and then trying to
shift my perspective tounderstand better where people
are coming from.
So with Dump or Dave, this madea huge difference and after
learning that they were goingthrough a really tough personal
issue and actually a few issuesthat were stemming from that one
issue, we improved our workingrelationship significantly and

(06:26):
we also we set some boundariesusing I statements right, just
opening up that when we're goingthrough hard times, that we
should let the other person knowand just be maybe overly
communicative, especially whenit comes to meetings or meeting
times, right, and commitmentswhen you make a commitment do
you follow through on it.
That's what integrity is about.
And so if you start missingthese appointments to yourself

(06:47):
but then also missingappointments to other ones, well
, that can create challenges,right?
Well, guess what?
My stress levels went down andI felt much more at peace.
And you know the way that thatshowed up.
It showed up when I would pullup to the parking lot and I
would see his car in the parkinglot.
He got there before me and inthe past I'd be like, oh God, I
could feel my body, my skin,crawling, just thinking, gosh, I

(07:07):
got to spend another eighthours with this guy.
Oh, my goodness, dumber Davereally.
And now you know when we hadgone through that hard moment
really that come to honestmoment ever since, after that, I
always found myself less cringydriving up to the parking lot,

(07:27):
still had our moments.
I wasn't all hunky-dory andperfect by any means, but I
noticed that I was lessresentful.
I was also more empathetic andmore open to working through
those stressful situations,realizing that I'd been there
before I can get through themand it's just going through the
steps.
So hopefully one, if not allfive, of those strategies will

(07:51):
be helpful for you if you findyourself in a similar situation.
So let's talk about turningthese negative interactions into
opportunities for personalgrowth, because that is a choice
right At the end of the day.
It's a choice because everyinteraction, as challenging as
it is is a chance to practicepatience, empathy and resilience
.
According to a study publishedin the Journal of Applied

(08:12):
Psychology, people who regularlypractice empathy and emotional
regulation have better mentalhealth and their relationships
are stronger.
So next time someone pisses youoff, see it as a workout for
your emotional muscles.
It's like lifting weights Eachrep makes you stronger, and if

(08:34):
you take that approach, maybewe'll actually have gratitude
for the people that piss us offsometimes.
Yeah well, that might be areach, but you know what I mean.
So if you want to explore thistopic further, I recommend
checking out a few resources,one being American Psychological
Association, harvard MedicalSchool, as well as the Journal
of Applied Psychology, and I'velinked to all those in the show

(08:56):
notes.
These are all great places tolearn more about emotional
regulation, personal growth andsome of the other pieces that I
talked about today.
So, all right, my 2% collectivewarriors.
That's it for today.
Remember, we all get pissed offsometimes, but how we respond
can make all the difference.
By practicing these simplestrategies, you can turn anger

(09:17):
and frustration intoopportunities for growth, while
also maintaining your peace ofmind and probably keeping the
peace in those environmentswhere you're finding yourself
triggered.
Thanks for tuning in to the 2%solution.
If you enjoyed this episode,share it with a friend who might
need help managing theiremotions today, and don't forget

(09:38):
to follow on social media.
Leave a review if you love thepodcast, or just shoot me a
message and say hey, this iswhat I'm working through right
now, or this is an idea I gotfor an episode.
I mean, whatever it is, reachout.
We've got that brand newfeature that's now live.
If you go into the show notes,there's a little button there
that says shoot me a text.
Just make sure you sign off onit with either an email or your

(10:01):
cell number so I can SMS youback.
If you don't sign off on it, Ican't write you back, but I can
receive, so feel free to provideany feedback, thoughts,
suggestions or ideas.
I'm more than happy to receivethose and, of course, reply if I
can.
So stay calm, stay strong andkeep pushing your limits.
I'm Diamond Welp and you'vebeen listening to the 2%

(10:22):
Solution.
Let's keep thriving togetherand I'll see you on the next
episode.