The Academic Imperfectionist

Ever wondered how your Imperfectionist friend here got from academic philosophy to coaching? Lots of coaching clients have asked this over the years, so here I am, with an episode to bring you up to speed. I'll tell you all about how it's thanks to COVID that I ended up coaching, how the podcast was born because I realised I was incapable of uttering sentences like 'Would you allow me to offer you a powerful and tran...

Do you massively over-estimate how much you can accomplish in any period of time? Do you struggle to work out how long it's going to take you to complete a particular project? Friend, same. Don't worry, though, because there are some well-recognised psychological reasons for that, and plenty of advice too. There's just one problem: when it comes to projects that are linked to your sense of self-worth, time management...

If only you spent more time working and less time procrastinating, your life would be so much better. Right? Friend, I know how you feel, but it's not that simple. Some forms of procrastination actually help us get our work done, while some forms of work are just a waste of your time. In fact, I've come to realise that the very idea of procrastination is pretty unhelpful, and it can stand in the way of understanding why w...

Do you ever feel that, unless you achieve the things you think you should be achieving, you'll cease to exist? That you'll fade away, become invisible, fail to be a fully-realised human? If so, you're in good company. For many of us, living a fulfilling life is inextricably linked with achievement, striving, productivity, winning.

I'm not here to tell you not to care about achievement. But I am going to tell you ...

Do you struggle to make sense of the jumble of attitudes you have towards your career? Perhaps you feel overlooked despite the fact that you've just been given a job. Perhaps you're striving to do well and hoping to get noticed while at the same time feeling resentful of the whole process, and critical of yourself for engaging in it. And, if you do feel these things, do you also attack yourself by telling yourself that yo...

'Habits are the compound interest of self-improvement', James Clear tells us in Atomic Habits. But what if you don't have the right habits - or at least, not yet? And how do you motivate yourself to do the thing for the 21 days that, according to legend, are required in order to establish a habit unless you already have the habit?

With all this talk of the importance of habits, you'd be forgiven for thinking that...

You've done the coaching and the therapy, you've read the books, you've listened to the podcasts - and finally, you can accept that you're just as worthy as the next person! You belong here! You can stand up, take up space, and be proud! You can stop carrying all that anxiety, fear, and shame! Except ... nobody told your anxiety, fear, and shame. You feel just as uncertain as you ever did. And, to make things wo...

You know all the advice about ignoring your inner critic, avoiding comparisons, and giving yourself credit for your achievements. But you can't shake the sense that the real you is something shameful, something you need to keep hidden at all costs, and that those people who say nice things about you would be horrified if they knew what you were really like. 

Friend, you've got Real You all wrong. The fact that there are pa...

Ah, the sabbatical. Getting one is like hitting the jackpot, right? All your problems would melt away if you had one. You'd go into it a frazzled, anxious, burnt out mess, and emerge serene, rested, and with a few dazzling additions to your CV. In fact, you'd be so sorted if you got a sabbatical that it's probably never occurred to you that you might need some hand-holding through the process.

Enter our guest for this...

What's your reaction when your inner critic tells you that what you're doing is not good enough? If you think she's right, and that it's only thanks to her that you're getting anything done at all, you're not alone. But while you're busy listening to your inner critic, you're overlooking the fact that she's not helping you. In fact, she's making things worse. She's so greedy an...

Do you know how writing is supposed to feel when it's going well? If you're anything like I was a few years ago, you have some pretty bizarre ideas here, involving things like hours on end of laser-sharp flow, iron-clad willpower to resist distractions, and a mind that is drawn towards lofty ideas instead of flighty nonsense. The fact that my actual experiences with writing didn't remotely resemble this fantasy was, ...

Are you entitled? If not, you should be. No, not like that. I'm not talking about over-entitlement, which these days seems to be what people mean when they talk about entitlement. We don't hear so much about under-entitlement: people who allow themselves to be short-changed by life because they don't realise they should be getting more. Or, rather, we do hear about this, but we don't talk about it using the lang...

Focus your attention on what you can control. That's what the Stoics taught us. But if you're someone who responds to every bad outcome with guilt-filled 'If only I'd ...' thoughts, you might be overestimating how much lies within your control. Don't worry - we can fix that. Grab a cuppa and sit down with your Imperfectionist friend for the first solo episode of 2025.

You can find the Wheel of Life exer...

Have you ever wondered whether Stoicism might help you manage the stresses of modern life and find peace and satisfaction despite things being far more imperfect that you'd like? Have you ever wondered what Stoicism even is, other than a source of motivational poster slogans and the inspiration for 4-minute-read online articles called things like 'Use These 3 Stoic Hacks to Put Out Your Bin Fire of a Life'? You have?...

Friends, you are going to feel so SEEN in this episode. Kate Ahl is an integrative psychotherapist who has spent her entire life living and working with academics. She spent several years as an in-house therapist at Cambridge University, where she helped researchers and other university staff work through their emotional and interpersonal challenges. You might think your struggles are uniquely weird and shameful - but Kate has seen...

I know you love nattering about your research with your fellow nerds. But do you know how to talk about it with normal people too - without sending them to sleep or bombarding them with jargon? If this is something you'd like to be able to do but you're terrified by the idea and/or you don't know where to start, this episode is for you. My guest this week is Tony Stubblebine, CEO of the huge blogging platform, Medium...

Professor Stephanie Dunson is an award-winning scholar with over 20 years' experience as a writing process expert under her belt. She holds positions at Yale School of Management and the University of Connecticut's Department of English - and if you're thinking, 'Wow, that's quite a mix of disciplines!', that's because Stephanie's understanding of the process and practice of writing truly tra...

Do you know how to turn what you're interested in thinking about into something that other people want to read about? Do you even know what you're interested in, as opposed to what you think you should be interested in? Do you recognise that boredom and feeling lost are necessary and unavoidable parts of the research process, and that you can use them to your advantage? Do you know how to tap into your unique strengths an...

Friends, it's the 100th episode! So, isn't it about time we talked about what perfectionism is, and why it's a problem? It's over 4 years since I recorded the first episode of this podcast, and I've learnt a LOT about perfectionism from the 99 episodes I've released so far - not to mention from the many hundreds of hours of coaching people I've done. Leave that unfinished project, that untidy desk...