May 9, 2025 • 51 mins
In this powerful episode of The Asset Mindset, host Daniel Fielding sits down with Alex Alley—a resilient mother, entrepreneur, and mindset coach—to explore how unwavering determination and the right mindset can transform even the most difficult circumstances.
Alex opens up about her journey of breaking free from domestic violence, rebuilding her life, and creating a new future for her children. Through honest and inspiring storytelling, she emphasizes the importance of mentorship, supportive relationships, and taking ownership of your mindset. From shifting self-talk to building confidence and finding joy, Alex shares actionable tools anyone can use to rise above fear and step into empowerment.
Whether you're a mother, a dreamer, or someone fighting to reclaim your life, this episode will motivate you to own your story, cultivate resilience, and start building the life you deserve.
🎙️ Subscribe now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube—and don’t forget to share, rate, and review to help spread this message of healing and hope.
Get your copy of The Asset Mindset TODAY! Click the link below!
Chapters
00:00 Introduction and Background
01:28 Overcoming Adversity
05:13 Mindset Shift and Empowerment
10:34 The Role of Mentorship
12:47 Hard Work vs. Luck
14:30 Changing Relationships
16:28 Building a Supportive Circle
18:53 Key Concepts from the Asset Mindset
20:05 Family Dynamics and Influence
24:47 Turning Adversity into Strength
27:57 Future Goals and Aspirations
28:25 Dreaming Big: A Vision for the Future
30:02 The Power of Ownership and Mindset
32:47 Transforming Fear into Confidence
35:19 Strategies for Personal Growth
39:19 Dancing Through Life's Challenges
43:40 Embracing Joy and Positivity
46:26 Navigating Negative Energy
49:49 Empowering Others: A Call to Action
Connect with Daniel on social media!
LinkedIn: Daniel Fielding
Instagram: the_asset_mindset
Facebook: The Asset Mindset
Learn more at:
Follow Alex on Instagram today!
Instagram: the.freedom.mama
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
well, alex, welcome.
It's great to have you here.
I'm glad you could fit thisinto your schedule.
I know you're a busy mom andgot a lot going on.
Um, I feel your pain.
I get three kids myself andit's it's.
It's a lot raising kidsnowadays and you've just
recently moved, so yes, well,thank you so much for having me.
Wonderful.
Hey, I want you to just feeltotally relaxed.
(00:31):
Don't feel like you gotta beshort and sweet or long drawn
out, like you can talk as muchas you want and as little as you
want.
Just feel comfortable.
We're having a conversation,that's what this is all about,
and we're going to have aconversation that helps inspire
people, because you have aninspiring story.
The Asset Mindset, I think youknow, is helping people and
(00:53):
changing lives.
So so today on the AssetMindset podcast, we have the
Freedom Mama.
Alex.
Welcome to the show.
You're inspiring people.
You're helping women change.
Welcome to the show.
You're inspiring people.
You're helping women changetheir lives for the better.
You're being a mom.
You're doing all kinds of greatthings.
You're sharing your story,being bold out there in the
(01:14):
world.
I love it.
Can you fill us in here at theAsset Mindset podcast on what
you got going on and what you'redoing in life?
Speaker 2 (01:27):
Sure.
So I'm a solo mom of two boysages 12 and 13,.
If you can believe it, I have ateenager in my house.
I was born and raised inCalifornia's wine country and
I'm deeply rooted in freedom,with a passion for protecting my
children and helping other momsprotect their children, and
(01:47):
that stems from my 2016 escapefrom domestic violence.
The cost of leaving thatrelationship was so high for my
sons and I.
We actually spent the next 14months homeless.
My rock bottom was living in aMotel 6, zero dollars to my name
.
It was paid for by the county'shomeless assistance program.
(02:11):
And let me just tell you, inthat depth of despair, I created
the Freedom Movement and Ipromised myself and my children
that I was going to change ourlives for the better, and that's
exactly what I've been doingever since.
And I'm myself and my childrenthat I was going to change our
lives for the better, and that'sexactly what I've been doing
ever since, and I'm proud to saythat today I'm actually living
in Idaho and my boys are happyand healthy and thriving.
(02:34):
I'm building two businesses, soI'm so busy.
I have my housekeeping businessit's Freedom Clean, of course
and then my true passion is mypartnership with the wellness
company.
Their business model hasallowed me to stay home with my
kids, which is huge.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
That's fantastic, I love it and that's why I know
you're a perfect guest for ourpodcast here.
So I'm gonna ask you a littlequestion.
That might be, you know,something that's difficult in
some ways but at the same time,very empowering.
So, in your life, what was thathardest moment where you
realized you needed to let go oryou're going to break down, or
(03:14):
you had to step up and actuallylike, take charge and ownership
of your life?
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Good question.
So that was, uh, november of2016.
I was in an abusiverelationship with my kid's
father.
Uh, the only reason I didn'tleave is because my oldest son
is not biologically mine, buthe's more mine than anyone else
is, and so I felt that Icouldn't leave without him.
(03:43):
Um, but a moment happened whereI almost lost my life, and so I
had to pack my kids and my dogin the car and that's it and
escape her freedom.
And in that moment, when wewere sitting in that Motel 6,
eating peanut butter and jellysandwiches for the hundredth
time and potato chips, Irealized that I needed to make a
shift.
(04:03):
And it was all my mindsetthat's really what it was that I
was keeping myself stuck inthis negative environment
because I felt like I didn'tdeserve better or I couldn't
achieve success.
And every day since then, Ihave been trying to build this
better life.
But, if I'm being completelyhonest, it was in 2013 or 2023,
(04:28):
sorry that I had petitioned tothe court to transfer
guardianship up to Idaho.
I was just in the depths of mydepression.
I was sharing it online, whichis how you and I connected, and
you sent me your book and itchanged my life.
It's.
I'm going to try not to getemotional.
It shifted my mindset fromvictim to warrior.
(04:48):
Like I can do this.
Everything that I've faced, Ihave survived, so why can't I do
this?
And here I am today helpingother moms do the same thing and
sharing your message of theasset mindset and it's helping
people.
Your book and your message ishelping so many people, so you
should be so proud of yourself.
Speaker 1 (05:11):
Thank you.
Thank you, alex, you're tookind, but you're you're doing
the same thing and I want totouch a little bit on this.
You know, in our connection andwhatnot, I learned about you a
little bit through my wife andshe shared a couple of posts and
I'm like, oh, she's cool, I'mgoing to follow her.
And then I was hearing yourstory and I could just sense and
(05:32):
then spirit or whatever talk tome.
It was like you know what, Ibet you she could use the book
and I'm like you know what, I'mgoing to message her and see,
I'll send her a free copy.
I don't want anything from it,I don't want any promotion, but
just some inner guidance orspirit was like get her this
book.
So I was like she may not evenrespond, you know, or thinking,
(05:54):
what is this guy?
I'm giving him a mailingaddress.
You know it's kind of creepyand you know, and I'm sure you
do get creepy stuff, but I waslike, nope, I'm going to listen
to my gut.
So, for anybody that's out thereand you're like, oh, I'm
feeling compelled to dosomething, take the leap, you
know, take it, because you canchange someone's life by taking
(06:15):
the leap.
So, yeah, I sent you the bookand wasn't sure how it would go
down and, wow, you are one ofthe other people that are out
there that just it's mindboggling, like I was just trying
to share the truth, trying toshare some knowledge, things
I've learned through life,seeing how people can be
successful, how they canovercome obstacles, how they can
(06:37):
overcome victim mentality, andit's changing people's lives.
So with that, I would like youto share a little bit on that
shift for you, because it soundslike you were dealing with a
lot of I can't or victimmentality and depression.
So, all right, my book theAsset Mindset helped you, but
(06:59):
what were the things in therethat changed your mindset to
become who you are now?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Good question, okay?
So I'm going to be honest withyou.
There was a couple of storiesin your book that really stood
out to me.
One was your wife's story ofredemption and survival so
motivating, I'm so proud of her.
The funny one was the story ofyou, as a 12 year old boy,
trying to remove that tree stump.
(07:27):
Okay, I think about that storyevery single day.
And I remember I was walkinginto court in California getting
ready to hear the judge'sverdict of whether I could take
my son out or not, and I thoughtI was going to pass out and
throw up all at the same time.
I was sick out or not, and Ithought I was going to pass out
and throw up all at the sametime.
I was sick.
And I remembered that story ofyour perseverance.
(07:51):
Your mindset of you were goingto get that dang stump out no
matter what.
And I thought, okay, it justgave me a little push and I
walked in that courtroomcompletely confident and walked
out victorious and I actuallyokay, so I have actually okay,
so I have the book here.
I always have the book everysingle night, every single night
, without fail.
I go over the fundamentals andI've highlighted them and I say,
(08:15):
okay, did I do this?
Did I do this?
Was I, did I show up a hundredpercent in all of these
categories?
And if not, then I pushedmyself harder the next day.
So it's just, it's reallytraining your brain from I can't
do this, I'm not good enough to.
Yes, the hell, I can do thisand I'm going to do this.
Watch me.
And that's where I'm at.
(08:36):
I'm just watch me because I'mnot done yet.
My story isn't done yet.
I have so many big dreams andgoals, so watch me achieve them.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
That's fantastic.
I love it.
I'm so happy, I'm so proud ofyou.
I can't wait to see what you doin the future.
Look at you.
You're on podcasts now andeverything like you're crushing
it girl.
So what would you say to theold you?
Like, you know where you arenow, you know how you think now.
Like, if you were able to goback in time and say three years
(09:12):
ago or five years ago, you pickthe time.
To your old self, what wouldyou say?
Speaker 2 (09:20):
I think about this every day.
I would say get the hell up.
Yes, you can, You're strongenough.
It's about turning your rockbottom into your foundation and
that's just the.
It's the biggest thing.
So in my mindset was you know,all about the victim mentality?
(09:40):
I can't believe this happenedto me.
I'm this, I'm that, but I wasgood enough all along.
I could have built thissuccessful life all along had I
just believed in myself.
And so the transformation,really it's all within us.
No one else can do it for us.
I mean, we can share the assetmindset and we can share people
(10:03):
on, but they have to believe inthemselves first and foremost.
So I just wish that I hadbelieved in myself.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
Yeah, that's what I try and tell people all the time
you are your greatest asset,you have the power, you have the
ability, you have the drive.
You may not know it, you maynot believe it, but you got to
step back and figure it out,because you can be your greatest
asset or you can be yourbiggest liability, and I don't
know anybody in life that wantsmore liabilities.
So figure it out, you can do itand there's other people out
(10:34):
there that will help you.
So I know you're saying theasset mindset myself helped a
lot, but I'm sure there's otherpeople that have helped you and
have maybe mentored you a littlebit.
Or, if you want to shareanything else, I mean feel free,
but talk about the importanceof maybe finding someone to help
teach you, or a mentor or ateacher, so that you can
(10:58):
overcome this victim mentality.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Yes, yes.
So, uh, when I started sharingmy story online on Instagram, um
, I met I met one of my dearestfriends and his name is Dustin
and he owns uh United PatriotsApparel Company, and he has been
such an incredible mentor to meand he really built me up and
(11:24):
held a mirror so that I couldsee myself the way other people
see me, and so I'm just supergrateful to him.
He was such a big help ingetting me from the rock bottom
that I was four years ago to nowto just believing in myself.
So, yeah, finding someone whosees you and will cheer you on
(11:45):
is so important yes, that is.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
I love it.
I love it.
I'm just I, I don't know man, Ijust like.
This is one of those thingslike I just want to give you a
big hug because you're like sucha different person and you're
growing and you're strong.
You're that strong.
Mama bear now, or freedom, mama,I love it so I want people to
to now address or with you, I'dlike like to address luck,
(12:12):
because a lot of people ohyou're lucky, you had this
happen to you now, oh you'relucky, it's not all luck, is it?
Isn't there other stuff likehard work involved?
Speaker 2 (12:24):
Absolutely.
Yeah, Hard work, 100%.
I don't really consider myselflucky.
I didn't see a whole lot ofluck happening in my story, but
I had to work really hard andyou know I've shared that whole
journey.
I was really vulnerable online,you know, to the point of like
it's embarrassing, but I did itbecause I knew that there was a
(12:47):
mom out there who didn't believein herself.
She was going through the sametype of situation and she needed
to see someone pushing through,someone who was actually
working hard and got it.
So just believing in yourself,it's not about luck, it's get up
, work your butt off and goodthings will happen.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
Yeah, I think hard work and motivation and
discipline increase your luck.
Like, the harder you work, themore people are going to notice
you.
The more people that notice you, you might get lucky, and one
of those people will reach outor help you, or different things
will happen.
That's one of the things I'veseen as far as when you work
(13:28):
hard, your odds get better ofsuccess.
Maybe it's luck, your luck getsbetter.
It doesn't matter, though.
It's the hard work and peopletake notice when you're working
hard and change, when you startchanging and becoming an asset
(13:54):
mindset type person.
You know living with an assetmindset lifestyle that
challenges other people.
What is the relationships andhow's that affected some of your
relationships in life in theworld, whether it be family or
whatever?
Speaker 2 (14:07):
Well, I have three friends left and I'm out of my
big, huge family.
I speak to my aunt and my uncleand one of my nieces and that's
it.
So my circle has gotten reallysmall, which is kind of crazy.
Right, you start to grow andfind even a little bit of
success and people are like whodo you think you are?
(14:29):
Why do you think that you cango on this podcast?
Why do you think you can speakout online?
It's like because I can't,because life is about growing.
So you're either going to growwith me or bye.
That's how I am right now.
I'm focused on my dreams everysingle day and I tune out
(14:50):
everything that isn't getting meto my dream life.
Speaker 1 (14:54):
That's awesome, I love it and I want to share with
you and the listeners.
So when you're going throughchanges like that and you have
mental growth and you're cuttingout like baggage or setting
boundaries with people, yourcircle will get smaller, but
then it will get bigger becausewhat happens is it's like
emptying your cup.
(15:15):
So you've emptied all this badstuff out, so now you have room
to put in good people like hey,we're asset mindset teammates.
Now we didn't know each other.
You know and look where we are.
So I want the listeners to knowthat it'll get smaller and be a
(15:36):
little difficult and painful,but you're going to fill up that
circle again with highercaliber people, because now your
energy is different and yourmindset is different, so you're
going to attract differentpeople.
So, with that being said, howhas your circle changed, from
what you're saying with familyor old friends to now what you
(15:59):
see starting to happen with yourcircle of people around you?
Speaker 2 (16:04):
Oh goodness.
So the circle that I have rightnow is super, super small, but
it's high energy.
It's people who are buildingbusinesses and focused on
helping people and makingpositive changes in the world.
No one I have in my life issitting around saying, oh, I'm
still stuck in this position orI'm still so broke and I don't
(16:26):
know how to fix it, or whatever.
These people are like let'sbuild this business, let's do
this, let's help this mom, andit's just like the energy is so
high and it changes theirvibration.
I'm just all about it.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
Yeah, it gets addicting, doesn't it?
Like, yeah, what can we take onnext?
Or what can we do?
Like it's exciting, it's sorewarding when you start seeing
changes or you're changing otherpeople's lives.
Honestly, I think we're on avery parallel path, because I
wrote the book to write it andmaybe leave a legacy for my
(17:02):
family.
And, hey, you know, generationslater, oh, this is the
philosophy that you know, mygrandfather or great grandfather
believed in, you know, andleaving it for my children to
help them.
And then it started helpingmore people and then more.
And then I'm hearing this andI'm hearing that and I'm like,
all right, there's something toit.
And then Simon and Schuster,Stephen King's publishing
company, reaches out to me andthey're like, hey, we want to
(17:24):
buy the rights to the assetmindset.
And I'm like, okay, God, I getit.
Like this is a lot bigger thanI thought.
And you know, you're livingproof.
There's other people livingproof and the concepts in there
really are life changing.
And the funny part to me is alot of us kind of already know
that we just we haven't figuredout how to put it into like a
(17:48):
recipe for life, to actuallyexecute it.
So that's what I do and try todo, as you know, with the asset
mindset is just simplify theconcepts so then you can apply
it to your life and go afteryour dreams, achieve things.
So, getting back to the book alittle bit, I know you say you
read it all the time and allthat, and so let's share some of
(18:13):
the key concepts that you thinkother people should be aware of
and apply in their life whenthey're trying to, you know,
have a more positive mindset andhave the asset mindset well of
(18:35):
pushing through.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
So your book talks a lot about pushing through really
difficult situations where youknow the average person would
give up honestly, and some ofyour situations there I would
not ever have been able to do,and I think that it's important
for people to realize thatyou're in charge.
You're in charge of your lifeand your future and anything
that you want to happen You'reabsolutely capable of doing.
(18:58):
But you have to decide whatyou're going to do and then say
no to everything that isn't that.
You know what I mean.
Like that's.
That's really the key messagethat I took from that book that
I think about every single dayis just you've got to keep going
.
You have to believe in yourselfand I'm in charge.
So if my life is in the tankeror it's really successful,
(19:19):
that's all on me.
Speaker 1 (19:22):
Absolutely Good.
I'm glad, I'm glad.
That's that's why I wrote it,you know, and I'm super happy
for you.
So let's get into the familydynamic with your boys.
What have the boys noticed?
What are?
Speaker 2 (19:41):
they thinking about all this asset, mindset stuff
coming into their mom's life.
Well, it's actually.
You know, it's funny, becausewe used to live such a different
life than we do right now.
It was very sad, if you will,and sedentary.
And now my kids are likeworking out every day and, no
matter how they feel like it'llbe 1030 at night and my youngest
(20:02):
Caleb will come out and goes Ican't go to bed because I didn't
do my workout.
And I'm like, okay, buddy, godo your workout.
And I hear Ryder in his roomlifting weights late at night
workout.
And I hear Ryder in his roomlifting weights late at night.
And so they're reallyprioritizing their health and
wellness.
And when I like go to clean ahouse during the day, they're
able to sit at the table and dotheir schoolwork.
Because we homeschool, they'rejust focused.
(20:25):
And that makes me reallyemotional, because none of us
were focused before and nowwe're.
We all have a path and we'recrushing it, so I love it.
I focused before and now we're.
We all have a path and we'recrushing it, so I love it.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
I love it and you're leading the way they wouldn't
have been able to do thatwithout you.
So you need to, you know.
Give yourself a big pat on theback, high five, tell yourself
you're a badass in the mirror orwhatever.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Like you you're doing it by example you're doing it
by example.
Speaker 1 (20:58):
Yes, absolutely, absolutely.
And so have your boys actuallytaken on the asset mindset
philosophy themselves, or haveyou kind of shared it?
Have they read the book or?
I'm curious that dynamic yeah,some they're.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
They're still not too big on sitting down and reading
books.
I'm working on that part but wetalk about like the lessons in
the book and we go for a familywalk every evening down the
street to the park and we dolaps to get our steps in and I'm
always reminding them oflessons from the book or things
that they need to do forthemselves every day and that
(21:32):
that clicks because they want asuccessful life.
They're.
They're talking aboutbusinesses that they can build
and money that they can makewhen they get older, and I think
that's awesome, especially foryoung men who are being raised
by a single mom and who don'thave that male figure in their
life.
It's so important for us momsto be strong and to lead by
(21:54):
example and to live a healthylifestyle.
Speaker 1 (21:59):
I love that strong moms are so important.
Yes, they really are, or justany strong parent for that
matter, because if you don'thave a strong role model or a
strong parent, that poor childis behind the power curve.
It just really is.
And that's, I think, adifficult thing that a lot of
children are facing nowadays andI'm glad you're able to help
(22:24):
your boys step it up and notjust be victims to society and
the way things are going and thevictim mentality or the
snowflake stuff Like no, youneed to take charge of your life
.
You know, yeah, someone mayvictimize you, but you're not
going to be a victim for therest of your life.
Only you can victimize yourselffor the rest of your life by
(22:46):
replaying that negative badthing over and over and over in
your head.
But when you realize, no, thatperson victimized me, okay, well
, f you, I'm done.
You know like you're out, I'mmoving on, I'm driving on, and
the best way to say fuck you tothem is to be successful.
It really is.
(23:07):
You know, you talk about my wifein the book like that's one of
her things.
She loves it.
Now I mean, you know we've gonefrom a little two bedroom,
whatever house and she wasstruggling and whatnot.
When we met to now, here I amliving outside of Nashville in a
million dollar home like this.
We didn't think this wouldhappen either.
(23:28):
But guess what Hard work, havingpassion, believing in what you
do, like those are things thatthe world, god, will recognize.
All right, you're on the rightpath, you're going to be
rewarded Doesn't mean he's notgoing to test you, doesn't mean
you're not going to havedifficulties, but let's take
those difficulties and turn theminto something positive, a
(23:50):
lesson you learned from.
So I want to kind of hit that,because I think that's what's
happening with you.
You had a lot of challenges andadversity, you know, with a
spouse or you know your partner,and that now, yes, at that time
, now, yes, at that time it wasa heavy burden and you were
(24:15):
carrying that.
But it seems to me now thatyou've been able to flip that
and you're using that as anasset to help other people.
What's that like to shift thatand to be able to realize that
you can turn that around.
Speaker 2 (24:31):
Oh goodness.
So that's just like.
My biggest passion is my storyof redemption and survival.
Sharing that with other momswho are in similar situations
right and they've got thispartner who maybe has taken them
to family court.
That was a big thing in my life.
Family court and that fear andanxiety that comes from that
(24:51):
especially when you're a newlysingle mom who doesn't have
money to fight in family court,it's not really a fair fight.
To be able to shift thatmindset and to see somebody else
who also doesn't have any moneyand who's doing it all by
themselves and fighting this youknow what I like to call a
monster.
Really.
That was in our life andwinning.
(25:12):
People need to see that.
People need to see that you canabsolutely do this.
It doesn't matter if you don'thave money.
It doesn't matter if you know,whatever your homeless or
whatever your situation is,you're still worthy enough to
bite and you need to do it.
So I always say walk throughthe fire, girl.
Walk through that fire.
We can do this.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
That's been a theme lately.
Fire you know you're on fire,you got to walk through that
fire.
We can do this.
That's been a theme lately.
Fire You're on fire, you got towalk through the fire forged by
fire.
Yeah, absolutely, and one ofthe things that I want to key on
is what you're saying.
There is also that mentality ofoh, I can't.
Shifting and changing to how doI?
All right, I don't have moneyto do this.
(25:55):
Well, how do I get the money?
Or how do I do it?
Filing it myself without anattorney?
Or how do I?
So you got to get rid of the Ican't.
Or, oh, poor me.
Or I don't know how figure itout, how do?
I you know cause how manyresources are out there.
You know it's modern time.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Yeah, there's so much help, there's so many resources
.
I mean, every state isdifferent, but in California I
spent a lot of time in the lawlibrary because I didn't have
money to hire a lawyer and Irepresented myself all the way
through every battle and my exand his mom his mom had money
and she fought me pretty hardwith a lawyer and there was a
(26:38):
moment and I shared this on mysocial media that I had to
swallow my pride and I had toask for help and I created a
GoFundMe and I asked myfollowers you know they were
very invested in my story tosave Ryder and to get him out of
California and really amazingpeople donated and it was just
enough to get me through thatfight and where I'm at right now
(26:59):
, which is an amazing life I'mfighting for my boys.
It makes me really emotionalbecause, for you know, since I
became a mom, I always said Ican't do this, I can't leave, I
can't fight in court, I can'tleave California.
And look at me now.
Yes, I can.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
Yes, I can.
Yeah, that's what we're talkingabout here.
That's the asset mindset inaction.
So let's talk about the future.
You now Like what are yourplans and goals?
You got the businesses going on.
Tell us about that and whateverelse you want to share.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
Okay.
So my dreams and goals.
So I always say I have smalldreams and goals and that's
totally okay with me.
I don't want million-dollarbusinesses and hundreds of
thousands of social mediafollowers.
That's just not my jam.
My dream life, right, is tohave a little house, three
bedrooms, two-bathroom house, onmaybe an acre of land.
(27:54):
I'm not greedy, just a littlesomething that's mine.
And to have my wellnessbusiness be my main source of
income, so that I'm not, youknow, I'm 40.
So I don't want to be cleaninghouses forever, but just really
passionate about helping moms.
I want to help as many momsprotect their children as
(28:14):
possible.
And so I see myself on thisland.
You shared a reel and you areshowing your farm and your cows
and I was like that is my dreamlife, right there.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
Come to Nashville, we'll give you a tour and you
can meet my wife.
We can have dinner.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
That would be awesome .
Yeah, that's my dream.
It's small, but it's.
It's exactly what I want toraise my children with the
freedom that we deserve.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
No, that's fantastic, but if you're going to want
cows, you're going to need morethan an acre.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
And dream big Do it, do it.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Don't dream small, don't do it.
Alex, you got this.
I'm cheering for you.
Get however many acres you needfor whatever it is.
You need whatever pets you wantthem goats to fall asleep and
fall over.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
I want baby cows, so badly.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
Baby cows.
I'll share some pictures withyou.
We got four baby cows this yearand Coco Bean oh, boy, she's a
cutie and she just was born thismonth and boy, she's just
adorable.
Anyway, I digress, let's getback to the asset mindset.
We're having fun here and youknow connecting.
(29:21):
So I want to, um, keepencouraging your goals.
You know, like you said, like,oh, I don't need it, I don't
have to have the big house.
I'm not saying liveextravagantly, but one of the
things I try and teach people isdon't be afraid to dream bigger
(29:42):
.
And your dream should be bigenough that it scares you a
little but you're also excitedabout it.
If you're just like you know, Iget a house and a couple of
bedrooms, yeah, that's great,that's a stepping stone dream.
How bad-ass would it be if youdo end up having whatever
business take off, it franchisesor does whatever it does, or
(30:03):
you just have that residualcashflow that you and your sons
can hey, let's go take avacation, let's go fly first
class to somewhere and see aconcert.
Like that's the freedom, it.
It's out there in the world andI think a lot of people limit
themselves and don't realizethat that's out there because it
is and you can achieve it.
You can, alex, and you thelistener, can too.
(30:26):
You really can.
There's people every day thatare doing I've seen it.
I've flown on private jets.
You know people that have theirown pilots and land in and do
and it's amazing.
And for so many people,including myself, for a time
period I thought that was like,oh, that's out of reach, that
can't happen, that's a fakestory.
But now I know multiple peoplewith their own jets and I'm like
(30:49):
, wow, you know, we go out todinner.
And my uh comedian friend,chris Porter, who should be
coming on some some point hereon the podcast, he's like it's
crazy, I go out to dinner nowwith friends and we're all
trying to pay the bill and fightand sneak and pay the bill.
And somebody was like, oh, itmust be nice to have rich people
(31:09):
.
And yeah, it's nice to haverich people, but it's also
giving people.
The more you give, the more youreceive.
My wife and I just did an eventand a foundation dinner that we
were part of this organization,the Mian Foundation.
We went to Guatemala with mywife and I to help people down
in Guatemala and we raised moneyfor them and tens of thousands
(31:31):
of dollars from some of thestuff that we did.
And guess what?
We got a phone call hey, wouldyou like to go to Disney on Ice
with your family and kids?
We got some sweet tickets andyou have a reserved parking spot
, like what.
So we have to have this amazingexperience.
So who you surround yourselfwith is very important, and
(31:52):
you're going to see that, andyou're already starting to see
it, because I see your smile andI see your life changing and
all these things.
But you might be reallysurprised, like if you go back,
what five years?
You see, wow, I can't believewhere I am now.
Fast forward another five years.
What are you going to be like?
You know?
Speaker 2 (32:11):
I'm so excited for the future.
I know that I'm going to dogreat things and that I'm going
to provide that life that I'vealways dreamed of for my sons.
I'm like let's go, I am readyfor this.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
Nice, I love it.
So people say ownership ispower.
How empowering has it been foryou to take ownership in your
life.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
Oh my gosh, I'm a completely different person.
But, to be honest, if you goback a couple of years and you
look at my social media, and Iwas on my kitchen floor crying,
worried about court to now, ohmy gosh, I in those moments took
ownership of my life and Iwalked through the fire and I
know now that I can do all thosescary things and that, no
(32:56):
matter what, me and my kids aregoing to be okay on the other
side of it.
And so that ownership is keyChanging your mindset, taking
ownership of your life, decidingwhat you want and just running
for it, because tomorrow isn'tpromised to any of us.
So if you're waiting for Fridayto live, if you're waiting for
(33:16):
the weekend to, like, dosomething fun or spend time with
your family, you're wastingyour life.
You're doing it wrong.
That's what I say Doing itwrong.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
Yeah, absolutely.
I agree wholeheartedly.
You know, every day you have todo something to chase your
dream, or that's your why.
Every day, you know, I put mygirls to bed and I'm like what's
the best thing that happened toyou today?
What did you do kind today?
What did someone do kind to youtoday?
So that they are focusing andlearning like, all right, what
(33:48):
was the best part of my day?
And giving and receiving andteaching them the real values of
life, those are the things thatleave a mark and leave a legacy
, because if you have a bunch ofmoney in the bank, oh that's
great or whatever, but havingthose moments, those
relationships, those are gamechanging and people can have
(34:12):
them.
And the asset mindset, as yousee and know, really does help
people get on track for that.
The concepts I share in therethey're real and it's not all
about me.
I mean, you know this forpeople that haven't listened to
the book on audio or haven'tread the book, check it out,
because I guarantee there'ssomething in there that's going
(34:35):
to touch you or help you ordirect you or at least at the
bare minimum, reinforcesomething that you already know.
There are good things out there.
So Alex you are just radiatingthis energy.
Now, that's so different.
What would you suggest peopledo to get that energy that you
(35:02):
have now, like that transitionfrom that depression, anxiety
energy into this amazing growthmindset person that you are
today?
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Let's give them the listeners some tips and
viewpoints from Alex.
So I like to tell the moms thatcome to me for coaching and to
build a business.
I like to tell them to focus onthemselves first and foremost
your health, your wellness, yourmindset.
You need to cut everybody out,but even for a short amount of
(35:35):
time, cut out anything that'snegative, because it does change
your life.
It really does change your lifewhen you're super laser focused
on your dreams.
I always tell them, I give themhomework on our first strategy
session and one of the pieces ofhomework is to go read your
book, because it's going tochange their mindset by the next
(35:55):
time that they come and theymeet with me.
And I also tell them write downyour dream life on a piece of
paper.
What does your perfect lifelook like when you wake up in
the morning?
What does it feel like?
How much money do you have thatyou're comfortable?
What are you and your kidsdoing?
What are you doing for work?
Make a plan to get that andthen say no to everything else.
(36:17):
That isn't that.
And by the time that they comeback to me, they're like I feel
so much better and I'm like yeah, I know.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
I love it.
Yeah, I know so.
So when I think that's soamazing and powerful.
So what's the biggest thing yousee from like, the first
meeting to the second meeting?
When you say, like you givethem the homework assignment.
Speaker 2 (36:42):
Yeah, their confidence level and that's what
I look for is the confidencelevel.
The first meeting they'realways, like you know, sitting
down in their chair.
They're afraid to speak to me.
Their why isn't very big,they're just fearful.
And then they do the homeworkand they come back and they're
like, okay, I feel good, my whyis X, y, z and I'm ready to run.
(37:04):
Your why has to be bigger thanyour fear it has to be,
otherwise you're just not goingto build the life they want.
So make sure that your why isworth all the hard work that you
need to put in to achieve yourdreams.
And my why was my children?
Was getting our income up, wasgetting us out of California and
(37:25):
to safety, so that my kids werehappy.
They are thriving, it's worthit fantastic.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
I love it.
And confidence is so importantand I think people you know lack
confidence because of fear.
You know, and I I say fear isfalse evidence appearing real,
because you're projecting whenyou have fear it is something
that may happen in the future.
Because you're thinking likeI'm afraid to go on a plane
(37:53):
because Because why it may crashor this might happen.
But don't focus on that.
Do the what if, what if it wasan amazing flight and I got to
have this incredible vacation atthe other end of the
destination?
Play tricks on you andsometimes you just need to, like
(38:18):
you said, take time to yourselfand figure out your why.
We all need that, even myself.
Sometimes I need to step aside.
Someone recently shared you know, go for a walk as a health
thing, but then, as we werediscussing more and more, going
for a walk is also a mentalthing, because you get your
blood flowing and now you'rejust you're walking, so your
mind starts analyzing things andprocessing stuff and you can
(38:41):
take things in.
So going for a walk is verypowerful.
So if you're trying to figureout your why, go for a walk.
See what's important, see whatcomes up, journal.
You know these things can help.
Now do you do a lot ofjournaling.
Speaker 2 (38:56):
I do twice a day, every day, and I also do two
walks per day too.
I wake up early, I go for awalk, I have it stacked, so I'm
walking, I'm getting my steps in, but I'm also listening to a
motivational podcast so that itit um, trains my brain for the
day.
I'm in a positive mindset.
I come home, I turn up themusic, I dance around my house,
(39:17):
I don't care if I look stupid.
I'm pumping myself up to beable to help the other moms or
to help my kids with theirhomeschool work, whatever it is.
I want to be the best, mostpositive version of myself for
everybody around me.
It's important and you weretalking about that.
What if people say that all thetime?
What if I fail?
What if I can't do this?
That used to be me every day ofmy life, and then one day I
(39:40):
woke up and I was like, what ifI win?
What if I succeed?
You know what if I make it?
And that changes the game?
You got to do that.
Speaker 1 (39:51):
Absolutely.
That's why I talk about thepage master concept.
Like turn the page in your head.
Don't keep reading that samesame thing over and over again,
like, oh, I can't, or oh, thishappened, or you know, here I am
, whatever it may be, you'restuck on that page.
Turn it, you know.
That's one of the great thingsabout being a human being and
the capacity of our brain andour mind, like you and I, right
(40:22):
now, could talk about anythingyou want to talk about.
You know, hey, let's talk aboutelephants in Africa.
Oh, no, wait, let's talk about.
You know what happenedyesterday.
You know, with the weather, ordid you see a bumblebee is not
supposed to fly.
You know, because of whateverphysics like, we have that
ability, and learning that youcan have that self-awareness to
change your mind is soempowering.
So, while we're on this topic,I want to ask you because you're
(40:42):
a human being and the struggleis real for all of us, including
me, and I wrote the damn book.
But when you have fear anddoubt come in.
How do you combat that now?
Like, what do you, what stepsdo you take when those thoughts,
you know, start trying to eatback in there?
Where do you go?
Or what do you do?
Speaker 2 (41:00):
Yeah.
So every day there's still alittle bit of fear that creeps
in of you know the what if it'sgoing to go wrong?
Um, my go-to is to put on myheadphones and go for a walk.
I'm just really big on thatright now.
It helps center me so much.
But also dancing.
I like to dance around my house.
I like to turn my music up atfull blast.
(41:22):
There's something about justlike dancing that really shakes
out that fear and anxiety andthen you can kind of look at the
situation and realize it's notthat bad.
There's always a solution.
You just have to shake thatshit off first to be able to see
it.
You know what?
Speaker 1 (41:38):
I mean, I love it.
Shake that shit off.
I love it.
That's great.
That might be a new thing I useShake that shit off, come on,
let's go.
But yeah, the, the energy thingand the vibrations are so
important.
You know, if you're sitting onthe couch and you're just like
balled up with a blanket andyou're like, oh, this sucks,
(42:02):
yeah, you're stuck on that,you're stuck in that mode,
everybody has a favorite song,damn it.
Put on your favorite song,crank it up, like you said,
start moving.
There's science behind it.
Up like you said, start moving.
There's science behind it.
Um, I forget who said it andI'm so sorry, but um, talked
about, like the um, the cells.
(42:23):
They release this hope moleculeor good feeling and dopamine
when you like.
Move around and you exerciseand that's a science.
You know scientific evidencethat proves movement.
So move, move.
Tony Robbins talks about thatpriming and getting up, move,
get things happening.
So I love that you use that.
So for all you listeners outthere, if you're having a suck
(42:45):
day, get out there and take awalk, move, listen to some music
, dance around your house.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
Motion creates emotion, so move that ass I love
it.
Speaker 1 (42:59):
Alex.
We're gonna see more dancingvideos of the asset mindset now,
dancing with my cows or mychickens, I get, we get, uh, 13
baby chicken content.
Speaker 2 (43:12):
okay, I would love to see that content.
Okay, please do that.
Speaker 1 (43:16):
Maybe I'll send you a DM with it or something, please
.
And laughter let's talk aboutlaughter and joy.
How much more laughter and joydo you have right now?
Speaker 2 (43:34):
Because you've been able to shift that mindset of
yours so much.
I annoy my children.
I'll be very honest with you, Iannoy them.
So have you ever heard the termrotting?
Where people rot, they like siton the couch or they get in bed
and they completely zone outand they Netflix for hours and
hours.
That used to be me.
There wasn't joy in my homeLike when I was trying to leave
California.
There wasn't joy in my homeLike when I was trying to leave
(43:55):
California.
That battle in family courtrobbed me of every ounce of joy
and money I had, and so I did alot of rotting.
I still took care of my kids,we still did all the things, but
there was no laughter or joy ordancing around my house.
And now that's all I do becauseI feel happy.
(44:15):
So I'm all about the joy andlaughter.
Speaker 1 (44:20):
I love it.
I love it.
My wife teases me sometimesbecause she's like you don't
know what it's like living withthe asset mindset Cause.
She's like how are you doing?
I'm like, terrific, let's go.
You know, let's be.
She's like, really, babe, youknow, I'm brushing my teeth, I
just woke up and I'm like it'sgoing to be a terrific day, it's
fantastic, you know.
She's like, oh, you're too much.
Sometimes I'm like, yeah, butwhat you hate about me, you love
(44:44):
about me.
Speaker 2 (44:47):
Yeah, that's so funny .
I actually have a friend.
When I was back, when I hadjust left and I was homeless
with my kids, and she said thatI could stay at her house for
two weeks while I was trying tofigure stuff out.
Those two weeks turned intoeight months.
She was an angel for letting mestay.
But I tried really hard to bepositive, like just a ray of
(45:08):
sunshine every day, becauseotherwise how are you going to
get through it?
And every day she would go.
You are so positive.
Like what?
How are you so positive?
I don't even like that.
I'm like really have to bepositive.
Do you want me walking aroundyour house crying all day long
Cause I could or I could be like, hey, we're going to have a
great day, let's turn on themusic and let's dance it out?
So some people really like thatpositivity and it rubs some
(45:30):
people the wrong way, for sure.
Speaker 1 (45:32):
No, it definitely.
I mean, my wife's cool with it.
She laughs at it, we make funabout it.
You know sharing these stories,but yeah, it does rub some
people the wrong way andhonestly, I think it's because
they're not ready.
They're not ready for thatgrowth or to take that step with
their mindset.
Cause, really, are you going tobe mad at someone for being
happy, right, like, come onpeople Like, don't you want to
(45:55):
be around someone that's happyor do you want to be around
someone that's angry ordepressed?
I don't think that's a hardthing to figure out and answer
is it?
Is it hard?
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (46:07):
no, not at all.
I have people actually whodespise me on social media
because I'm happy now they, theyliked me better when I was
crying on my kitchen floor notknowing how I was going to
survive, what I was goingthrough, and that's weird,
that's like weird energy to haveright.
Speaker 1 (46:24):
Totally weird energy.
And that's the thing.
Just because you have an assetmindset, philosophy and you're
living that way, it doesn't meanyou're not going to deal with
negative energy.
It's out there, it's a part ofthe world, you know.
It's part of the humancondition.
The struggle is real foreverybody.
There's going to be days whereit's a thunderstorm.
There's going to be a day whereit's beautiful, sunny, with
white, puffy clouds.
But you know that's just partof the game and understanding
(46:49):
where you're at in the journey.
You know, hey, if it's thistype of day today, guess what
Tomorrow's going to be different, it'll be better.
You know, hey, if it's thistype of day today, guess what
Tomorrow is going to bedifferent, it'll be better.
And you can always findsomething good.
You know they say the silverlining in the cloud.
At first, when I was younger, Iwas like, yeah, that's a bunch
of bullshit.
You know the silver lining.
But now there really is.
(47:10):
I mean, I was like you in a notvery good relationship.
You know, it was bad.
I ended up getting divorced.
At that point I thought it wasthe worst thing ever.
You know, I just got out of themilitary to start a family with
my wife and that fell apart.
But then I met my current wife,who's amazing, and I have three
(47:31):
kids that are amazing and whereI am, and you know what.
I wouldn't change a thing.
Now you know I don't want to goback to that because I amazing
and where I am, and you knowwhat.
I wouldn't change a thing.
Now you know I don't want to goback to that because I'm happy
where I'm at and it's one ofthose things that people need to
realize that when something badhappens, that's not defining
your life.
That's that moment in time andthat moment will pass, just like
(47:52):
every other bad moment you'vealready had in your life.
You know, if you're alive rightnow, there's nobody that's
walking this earth unless you'rejust a brand spanking new
newborn, and even that you knowyou just were born.
That's kind of traumatic.
So you know you're going tohave bad things happen to you.
So just, you learn to deal withit and you grow, and those are
lessons.
So I want to ask all ourlisteners right now to just
(48:17):
pause, go to the description andplease check out Alex Freedom
Mama, follow her, check out herbusiness, reach out to her if
you're a mom or you knowsomeone's struggling and she's
inspired.
You Check out her informationin the description and you'll be
able to contact her.
She's an amazing person.
And also, please follow, likeand subscribe to the Asset
(48:41):
Mindset podcast.
And while I just stumbled there,I'm going to share a little bit
something on myself.
I don't always do that, but Iwas in speech class up until
fifth grade and had a problempronouncing things and sometimes
would come out just like it didthere.
You know what you push throughit.
You know you got to do it.
(49:02):
I've gotten a lot better, butoccasionally I still struggle
with speaking, you know, but I'ma speaker.
I've got paid to speak in frontof hundreds of people.
So, with that being said,understand, listeners, you can
do so much more than you realize.
You absolutely can.
You are in control of yourdestiny more than anyone else,
(49:25):
anyone else.
It's you.
You own the power.
Alex, before we go and wrap uptoday's podcast, I want to give
you another moment to sharepodcast.
I want to give you anothermoment to share, to say anything
whatever you want to haveexpressed to the Asset Mindset
podcast listeners.
Speaker 2 (49:42):
Thank you so much.
Really, I want the moms outthere who are listening and
they're struggling and they'remaybe have left abuse or they're
just in a situation where theydon't know how they're going to
see through, or they're just ina situation where they don't
know how they're going to seethrough.
Then you can rebuild your life.
You're absolutely capable, youare strong and I'm cheering for
(50:03):
you.
My inbox is always open.
You don't have to join me inbusiness to get advice from me
or friendship from me.
You are your own greatest asset.
Speaker 1 (50:20):
So let's fucking go.
Yes, and I love when you usethe asset mindset quotes.
Awesome, alex, it's been ablast, it's been so much fun.
Maybe we'll do this againsometime.
I'm hoping you'll say yes if wedo decide and it works with our
schedules, because you'reinspiring and helping people,
and that's what the assetmindset is all about is helping
(50:40):
people and being a positiveperson in this world that's full
of chaos and a lot of evil.
So, once again, please like,subscribe, follow the Asset
Mindset Podcast.
You can find it on YouTube,spotify or you can always go to
theassetmindsetcom for moreinformation.
Remember, own your power.
well, alex, welcome.
It's great to have you here.
I'm glad you could fit thisinto your schedule.
I know you're a busy mom andgot a lot going on.
Um, I feel your pain.
I get three kids myself andit's it's.
It's a lot raising kidsnowadays and you've just
recently moved, so yes, well,thank you so much for having me.
Wonderful.
Hey, I want you to just feeltotally relaxed.
(00:31):
Don't feel like you gotta beshort and sweet or long drawn
out, like you can talk as muchas you want and as little as you
want.
Just feel comfortable.
We're having a conversation,that's what this is all about,
and we're going to have aconversation that helps inspire
people, because you have aninspiring story.
The Asset Mindset, I think youknow, is helping people and
(00:53):
changing lives.
So so today on the AssetMindset podcast, we have the
Freedom Mama.
Alex.
Welcome to the show.
You're inspiring people.
You're helping women change.
Welcome to the show.
You're inspiring people.
You're helping women changetheir lives for the better.
You're being a mom.
You're doing all kinds of greatthings.
You're sharing your story,being bold out there in the
(01:14):
world.
I love it.
Can you fill us in here at theAsset Mindset podcast on what
you got going on and what you'redoing in life?
Speaker 2 (01:27):
Sure.
So I'm a solo mom of two boysages 12 and 13,.
If you can believe it, I have ateenager in my house.
I was born and raised inCalifornia's wine country and
I'm deeply rooted in freedom,with a passion for protecting my
children and helping other momsprotect their children, and
(01:47):
that stems from my 2016 escapefrom domestic violence.
The cost of leaving thatrelationship was so high for my
sons and I.
We actually spent the next 14months homeless.
My rock bottom was living in aMotel 6, zero dollars to my name
.
It was paid for by the county'shomeless assistance program.
(02:11):
And let me just tell you, inthat depth of despair, I created
the Freedom Movement and Ipromised myself and my children
that I was going to change ourlives for the better, and that's
exactly what I've been doingever since.
And I'm myself and my childrenthat I was going to change our
lives for the better, and that'sexactly what I've been doing
ever since, and I'm proud to saythat today I'm actually living
in Idaho and my boys are happyand healthy and thriving.
(02:34):
I'm building two businesses, soI'm so busy.
I have my housekeeping businessit's Freedom Clean, of course
and then my true passion is mypartnership with the wellness
company.
Their business model hasallowed me to stay home with my
kids, which is huge.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
That's fantastic, I love it and that's why I know
you're a perfect guest for ourpodcast here.
So I'm gonna ask you a littlequestion.
That might be, you know,something that's difficult in
some ways but at the same time,very empowering.
So, in your life, what was thathardest moment where you
realized you needed to let go oryou're going to break down, or
(03:14):
you had to step up and actuallylike, take charge and ownership
of your life?
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Good question.
So that was, uh, november of2016.
I was in an abusiverelationship with my kid's
father.
Uh, the only reason I didn'tleave is because my oldest son
is not biologically mine, buthe's more mine than anyone else
is, and so I felt that Icouldn't leave without him.
(03:43):
Um, but a moment happened whereI almost lost my life, and so I
had to pack my kids and my dogin the car and that's it and
escape her freedom.
And in that moment, when wewere sitting in that Motel 6,
eating peanut butter and jellysandwiches for the hundredth
time and potato chips, Irealized that I needed to make a
shift.
(04:03):
And it was all my mindsetthat's really what it was that I
was keeping myself stuck inthis negative environment
because I felt like I didn'tdeserve better or I couldn't
achieve success.
And every day since then, Ihave been trying to build this
better life.
But, if I'm being completelyhonest, it was in 2013 or 2023,
(04:28):
sorry that I had petitioned tothe court to transfer
guardianship up to Idaho.
I was just in the depths of mydepression.
I was sharing it online, whichis how you and I connected, and
you sent me your book and itchanged my life.
It's.
I'm going to try not to getemotional.
It shifted my mindset fromvictim to warrior.
(04:48):
Like I can do this.
Everything that I've faced, Ihave survived, so why can't I do
this?
And here I am today helpingother moms do the same thing and
sharing your message of theasset mindset and it's helping
people.
Your book and your message ishelping so many people, so you
should be so proud of yourself.
Speaker 1 (05:11):
Thank you.
Thank you, alex, you're tookind, but you're you're doing
the same thing and I want totouch a little bit on this.
You know, in our connection andwhatnot, I learned about you a
little bit through my wife andshe shared a couple of posts and
I'm like, oh, she's cool, I'mgoing to follow her.
And then I was hearing yourstory and I could just sense and
(05:32):
then spirit or whatever talk tome.
It was like you know what, Ibet you she could use the book
and I'm like you know what, I'mgoing to message her and see,
I'll send her a free copy.
I don't want anything from it,I don't want any promotion, but
just some inner guidance orspirit was like get her this
book.
So I was like she may not evenrespond, you know, or thinking,
(05:54):
what is this guy?
I'm giving him a mailingaddress.
You know it's kind of creepyand you know, and I'm sure you
do get creepy stuff, but I waslike, nope, I'm going to listen
to my gut.
So, for anybody that's out thereand you're like, oh, I'm
feeling compelled to dosomething, take the leap, you
know, take it, because you canchange someone's life by taking
(06:15):
the leap.
So, yeah, I sent you the bookand wasn't sure how it would go
down and, wow, you are one ofthe other people that are out
there that just it's mindboggling, like I was just trying
to share the truth, trying toshare some knowledge, things
I've learned through life,seeing how people can be
successful, how they canovercome obstacles, how they can
(06:37):
overcome victim mentality, andit's changing people's lives.
So with that, I would like youto share a little bit on that
shift for you, because it soundslike you were dealing with a
lot of I can't or victimmentality and depression.
So, all right, my book theAsset Mindset helped you, but
(06:59):
what were the things in therethat changed your mindset to
become who you are now?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Good question, okay?
So I'm going to be honest withyou.
There was a couple of storiesin your book that really stood
out to me.
One was your wife's story ofredemption and survival so
motivating, I'm so proud of her.
The funny one was the story ofyou, as a 12 year old boy,
trying to remove that tree stump.
(07:27):
Okay, I think about that storyevery single day.
And I remember I was walkinginto court in California getting
ready to hear the judge'sverdict of whether I could take
my son out or not, and I thoughtI was going to pass out and
throw up all at the same time.
I was sick out or not, and Ithought I was going to pass out
and throw up all at the sametime.
I was sick.
And I remembered that story ofyour perseverance.
(07:51):
Your mindset of you were goingto get that dang stump out no
matter what.
And I thought, okay, it justgave me a little push and I
walked in that courtroomcompletely confident and walked
out victorious and I actuallyokay, so I have actually okay,
so I have the book here.
I always have the book everysingle night, every single night
, without fail.
I go over the fundamentals andI've highlighted them and I say,
(08:15):
okay, did I do this?
Did I do this?
Was I, did I show up a hundredpercent in all of these
categories?
And if not, then I pushedmyself harder the next day.
So it's just, it's reallytraining your brain from I can't
do this, I'm not good enough to.
Yes, the hell, I can do thisand I'm going to do this.
Watch me.
And that's where I'm at.
(08:36):
I'm just watch me because I'mnot done yet.
My story isn't done yet.
I have so many big dreams andgoals, so watch me achieve them.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
That's fantastic.
I love it.
I'm so happy, I'm so proud ofyou.
I can't wait to see what you doin the future.
Look at you.
You're on podcasts now andeverything like you're crushing
it girl.
So what would you say to theold you?
Like, you know where you arenow, you know how you think now.
Like, if you were able to goback in time and say three years
(09:12):
ago or five years ago, you pickthe time.
To your old self, what wouldyou say?
Speaker 2 (09:20):
I think about this every day.
I would say get the hell up.
Yes, you can, You're strongenough.
It's about turning your rockbottom into your foundation and
that's just the.
It's the biggest thing.
So in my mindset was you know,all about the victim mentality?
(09:40):
I can't believe this happenedto me.
I'm this, I'm that, but I wasgood enough all along.
I could have built thissuccessful life all along had I
just believed in myself.
And so the transformation,really it's all within us.
No one else can do it for us.
I mean, we can share the assetmindset and we can share people
(10:03):
on, but they have to believe inthemselves first and foremost.
So I just wish that I hadbelieved in myself.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
Yeah, that's what I try and tell people all the time
you are your greatest asset,you have the power, you have the
ability, you have the drive.
You may not know it, you maynot believe it, but you got to
step back and figure it out,because you can be your greatest
asset or you can be yourbiggest liability, and I don't
know anybody in life that wantsmore liabilities.
So figure it out, you can do itand there's other people out
(10:34):
there that will help you.
So I know you're saying theasset mindset myself helped a
lot, but I'm sure there's otherpeople that have helped you and
have maybe mentored you a littlebit.
Or, if you want to shareanything else, I mean feel free,
but talk about the importanceof maybe finding someone to help
teach you, or a mentor or ateacher, so that you can
(10:58):
overcome this victim mentality.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Yes, yes.
So, uh, when I started sharingmy story online on Instagram, um
, I met I met one of my dearestfriends and his name is Dustin
and he owns uh United PatriotsApparel Company, and he has been
such an incredible mentor to meand he really built me up and
(11:24):
held a mirror so that I couldsee myself the way other people
see me, and so I'm just supergrateful to him.
He was such a big help ingetting me from the rock bottom
that I was four years ago to nowto just believing in myself.
So, yeah, finding someone whosees you and will cheer you on
(11:45):
is so important yes, that is.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
I love it.
I love it.
I'm just I, I don't know man, Ijust like.
This is one of those thingslike I just want to give you a
big hug because you're like sucha different person and you're
growing and you're strong.
You're that strong.
Mama bear now, or freedom, mama,I love it so I want people to
to now address or with you, I'dlike like to address luck,
(12:12):
because a lot of people ohyou're lucky, you had this
happen to you now, oh you'relucky, it's not all luck, is it?
Isn't there other stuff likehard work involved?
Speaker 2 (12:24):
Absolutely.
Yeah, Hard work, 100%.
I don't really consider myselflucky.
I didn't see a whole lot ofluck happening in my story, but
I had to work really hard andyou know I've shared that whole
journey.
I was really vulnerable online,you know, to the point of like
it's embarrassing, but I did itbecause I knew that there was a
(12:47):
mom out there who didn't believein herself.
She was going through the sametype of situation and she needed
to see someone pushing through,someone who was actually
working hard and got it.
So just believing in yourself,it's not about luck, it's get up
, work your butt off and goodthings will happen.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
Yeah, I think hard work and motivation and
discipline increase your luck.
Like, the harder you work, themore people are going to notice
you.
The more people that notice you, you might get lucky, and one
of those people will reach outor help you, or different things
will happen.
That's one of the things I'veseen as far as when you work
(13:28):
hard, your odds get better ofsuccess.
Maybe it's luck, your luck getsbetter.
It doesn't matter, though.
It's the hard work and peopletake notice when you're working
hard and change, when you startchanging and becoming an asset
(13:54):
mindset type person.
You know living with an assetmindset lifestyle that
challenges other people.
What is the relationships andhow's that affected some of your
relationships in life in theworld, whether it be family or
whatever?
Speaker 2 (14:07):
Well, I have three friends left and I'm out of my
big, huge family.
I speak to my aunt and my uncleand one of my nieces and that's
it.
So my circle has gotten reallysmall, which is kind of crazy.
Right, you start to grow andfind even a little bit of
success and people are like whodo you think you are?
(14:29):
Why do you think that you cango on this podcast?
Why do you think you can speakout online?
It's like because I can't,because life is about growing.
So you're either going to growwith me or bye.
That's how I am right now.
I'm focused on my dreams everysingle day and I tune out
(14:50):
everything that isn't getting meto my dream life.
Speaker 1 (14:54):
That's awesome, I love it and I want to share with
you and the listeners.
So when you're going throughchanges like that and you have
mental growth and you're cuttingout like baggage or setting
boundaries with people, yourcircle will get smaller, but
then it will get bigger becausewhat happens is it's like
emptying your cup.
(15:15):
So you've emptied all this badstuff out, so now you have room
to put in good people like hey,we're asset mindset teammates.
Now we didn't know each other.
You know and look where we are.
So I want the listeners to knowthat it'll get smaller and be a
(15:36):
little difficult and painful,but you're going to fill up that
circle again with highercaliber people, because now your
energy is different and yourmindset is different, so you're
going to attract differentpeople.
So, with that being said, howhas your circle changed, from
what you're saying with familyor old friends to now what you
(15:59):
see starting to happen with yourcircle of people around you?
Speaker 2 (16:04):
Oh goodness.
So the circle that I have rightnow is super, super small, but
it's high energy.
It's people who are buildingbusinesses and focused on
helping people and makingpositive changes in the world.
No one I have in my life issitting around saying, oh, I'm
still stuck in this position orI'm still so broke and I don't
(16:26):
know how to fix it, or whatever.
These people are like let'sbuild this business, let's do
this, let's help this mom, andit's just like the energy is so
high and it changes theirvibration.
I'm just all about it.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
Yeah, it gets addicting, doesn't it?
Like, yeah, what can we take onnext?
Or what can we do?
Like it's exciting, it's sorewarding when you start seeing
changes or you're changing otherpeople's lives.
Honestly, I think we're on avery parallel path, because I
wrote the book to write it andmaybe leave a legacy for my
(17:02):
family.
And, hey, you know, generationslater, oh, this is the
philosophy that you know, mygrandfather or great grandfather
believed in, you know, andleaving it for my children to
help them.
And then it started helpingmore people and then more.
And then I'm hearing this andI'm hearing that and I'm like,
all right, there's something toit.
And then Simon and Schuster,Stephen King's publishing
company, reaches out to me andthey're like, hey, we want to
(17:24):
buy the rights to the assetmindset.
And I'm like, okay, God, I getit.
Like this is a lot bigger thanI thought.
And you know, you're livingproof.
There's other people livingproof and the concepts in there
really are life changing.
And the funny part to me is alot of us kind of already know
that we just we haven't figuredout how to put it into like a
(17:48):
recipe for life, to actuallyexecute it.
So that's what I do and try todo, as you know, with the asset
mindset is just simplify theconcepts so then you can apply
it to your life and go afteryour dreams, achieve things.
So, getting back to the book alittle bit, I know you say you
read it all the time and allthat, and so let's share some of
(18:13):
the key concepts that you thinkother people should be aware of
and apply in their life whenthey're trying to, you know,
have a more positive mindset andhave the asset mindset well of
(18:35):
pushing through.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
So your book talks a lot about pushing through really
difficult situations where youknow the average person would
give up honestly, and some ofyour situations there I would
not ever have been able to do,and I think that it's important
for people to realize thatyou're in charge.
You're in charge of your lifeand your future and anything
that you want to happen You'reabsolutely capable of doing.
(18:58):
But you have to decide whatyou're going to do and then say
no to everything that isn't that.
You know what I mean.
Like that's.
That's really the key messagethat I took from that book that
I think about every single dayis just you've got to keep going
.
You have to believe in yourselfand I'm in charge.
So if my life is in the tankeror it's really successful,
(19:19):
that's all on me.
Speaker 1 (19:22):
Absolutely Good.
I'm glad, I'm glad.
That's that's why I wrote it,you know, and I'm super happy
for you.
So let's get into the familydynamic with your boys.
What have the boys noticed?
What are?
Speaker 2 (19:41):
they thinking about all this asset, mindset stuff
coming into their mom's life.
Well, it's actually.
You know, it's funny, becausewe used to live such a different
life than we do right now.
It was very sad, if you will,and sedentary.
And now my kids are likeworking out every day and, no
matter how they feel like it'llbe 1030 at night and my youngest
(20:02):
Caleb will come out and goes Ican't go to bed because I didn't
do my workout.
And I'm like, okay, buddy, godo your workout.
And I hear Ryder in his roomlifting weights late at night
workout.
And I hear Ryder in his roomlifting weights late at night.
And so they're reallyprioritizing their health and
wellness.
And when I like go to clean ahouse during the day, they're
able to sit at the table and dotheir schoolwork.
Because we homeschool, they'rejust focused.
(20:25):
And that makes me reallyemotional, because none of us
were focused before and nowwe're.
We all have a path and we'recrushing it, so I love it.
I focused before and now we're.
We all have a path and we'recrushing it, so I love it.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
I love it and you're leading the way they wouldn't
have been able to do thatwithout you.
So you need to, you know.
Give yourself a big pat on theback, high five, tell yourself
you're a badass in the mirror orwhatever.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Like you you're doing it by example you're doing it
by example.
Speaker 1 (20:58):
Yes, absolutely, absolutely.
And so have your boys actuallytaken on the asset mindset
philosophy themselves, or haveyou kind of shared it?
Have they read the book or?
I'm curious that dynamic yeah,some they're.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
They're still not too big on sitting down and reading
books.
I'm working on that part but wetalk about like the lessons in
the book and we go for a familywalk every evening down the
street to the park and we dolaps to get our steps in and I'm
always reminding them oflessons from the book or things
that they need to do forthemselves every day and that
(21:32):
that clicks because they want asuccessful life.
They're.
They're talking aboutbusinesses that they can build
and money that they can makewhen they get older, and I think
that's awesome, especially foryoung men who are being raised
by a single mom and who don'thave that male figure in their
life.
It's so important for us momsto be strong and to lead by
(21:54):
example and to live a healthylifestyle.
Speaker 1 (21:59):
I love that strong moms are so important.
Yes, they really are, or justany strong parent for that
matter, because if you don'thave a strong role model or a
strong parent, that poor childis behind the power curve.
It just really is.
And that's, I think, adifficult thing that a lot of
children are facing nowadays andI'm glad you're able to help
(22:24):
your boys step it up and notjust be victims to society and
the way things are going and thevictim mentality or the
snowflake stuff Like no, youneed to take charge of your life
.
You know, yeah, someone mayvictimize you, but you're not
going to be a victim for therest of your life.
Only you can victimize yourselffor the rest of your life by
(22:46):
replaying that negative badthing over and over and over in
your head.
But when you realize, no, thatperson victimized me, okay, well
, f you, I'm done.
You know like you're out, I'mmoving on, I'm driving on, and
the best way to say fuck you tothem is to be successful.
It really is.
(23:07):
You know, you talk about my wifein the book like that's one of
her things.
She loves it.
Now I mean, you know we've gonefrom a little two bedroom,
whatever house and she wasstruggling and whatnot.
When we met to now, here I amliving outside of Nashville in a
million dollar home like this.
We didn't think this wouldhappen either.
(23:28):
But guess what Hard work, havingpassion, believing in what you
do, like those are things thatthe world, god, will recognize.
All right, you're on the rightpath, you're going to be
rewarded Doesn't mean he's notgoing to test you, doesn't mean
you're not going to havedifficulties, but let's take
those difficulties and turn theminto something positive, a
(23:50):
lesson you learned from.
So I want to kind of hit that,because I think that's what's
happening with you.
You had a lot of challenges andadversity, you know, with a
spouse or you know your partner,and that now, yes, at that time
, now, yes, at that time it wasa heavy burden and you were
(24:15):
carrying that.
But it seems to me now thatyou've been able to flip that
and you're using that as anasset to help other people.
What's that like to shift thatand to be able to realize that
you can turn that around.
Speaker 2 (24:31):
Oh goodness.
So that's just like.
My biggest passion is my storyof redemption and survival.
Sharing that with other momswho are in similar situations
right and they've got thispartner who maybe has taken them
to family court.
That was a big thing in my life.
Family court and that fear andanxiety that comes from that
(24:51):
especially when you're a newlysingle mom who doesn't have
money to fight in family court,it's not really a fair fight.
To be able to shift thatmindset and to see somebody else
who also doesn't have any moneyand who's doing it all by
themselves and fighting this youknow what I like to call a
monster.
Really.
That was in our life andwinning.
(25:12):
People need to see that.
People need to see that you canabsolutely do this.
It doesn't matter if you don'thave money.
It doesn't matter if you know,whatever your homeless or
whatever your situation is,you're still worthy enough to
bite and you need to do it.
So I always say walk throughthe fire, girl.
Walk through that fire.
We can do this.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
That's been a theme lately.
Fire you know you're on fire,you got to walk through that
fire.
We can do this.
That's been a theme lately.
Fire You're on fire, you got towalk through the fire forged by
fire.
Yeah, absolutely, and one ofthe things that I want to key on
is what you're saying.
There is also that mentality ofoh, I can't.
Shifting and changing to how doI?
All right, I don't have moneyto do this.
(25:55):
Well, how do I get the money?
Or how do I do it?
Filing it myself without anattorney?
Or how do I?
So you got to get rid of the Ican't.
Or, oh, poor me.
Or I don't know how figure itout, how do?
I you know cause how manyresources are out there.
You know it's modern time.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Yeah, there's so much help, there's so many resources
.
I mean, every state isdifferent, but in California I
spent a lot of time in the lawlibrary because I didn't have
money to hire a lawyer and Irepresented myself all the way
through every battle and my exand his mom his mom had money
and she fought me pretty hardwith a lawyer and there was a
(26:38):
moment and I shared this on mysocial media that I had to
swallow my pride and I had toask for help and I created a
GoFundMe and I asked myfollowers you know they were
very invested in my story tosave Ryder and to get him out of
California and really amazingpeople donated and it was just
enough to get me through thatfight and where I'm at right now
(26:59):
, which is an amazing life I'mfighting for my boys.
It makes me really emotionalbecause, for you know, since I
became a mom, I always said Ican't do this, I can't leave, I
can't fight in court, I can'tleave California.
And look at me now.
Yes, I can.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
Yes, I can.
Yeah, that's what we're talkingabout here.
That's the asset mindset inaction.
So let's talk about the future.
You now Like what are yourplans and goals?
You got the businesses going on.
Tell us about that and whateverelse you want to share.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
Okay.
So my dreams and goals.
So I always say I have smalldreams and goals and that's
totally okay with me.
I don't want million-dollarbusinesses and hundreds of
thousands of social mediafollowers.
That's just not my jam.
My dream life, right, is tohave a little house, three
bedrooms, two-bathroom house, onmaybe an acre of land.
(27:54):
I'm not greedy, just a littlesomething that's mine.
And to have my wellnessbusiness be my main source of
income, so that I'm not, youknow, I'm 40.
So I don't want to be cleaninghouses forever, but just really
passionate about helping moms.
I want to help as many momsprotect their children as
(28:14):
possible.
And so I see myself on thisland.
You shared a reel and you areshowing your farm and your cows
and I was like that is my dreamlife, right there.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
Come to Nashville, we'll give you a tour and you
can meet my wife.
We can have dinner.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
That would be awesome .
Yeah, that's my dream.
It's small, but it's.
It's exactly what I want toraise my children with the
freedom that we deserve.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
No, that's fantastic, but if you're going to want
cows, you're going to need morethan an acre.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
And dream big Do it, do it.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Don't dream small, don't do it.
Alex, you got this.
I'm cheering for you.
Get however many acres you needfor whatever it is.
You need whatever pets you wantthem goats to fall asleep and
fall over.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
I want baby cows, so badly.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
Baby cows.
I'll share some pictures withyou.
We got four baby cows this yearand Coco Bean oh, boy, she's a
cutie and she just was born thismonth and boy, she's just
adorable.
Anyway, I digress, let's getback to the asset mindset.
We're having fun here and youknow connecting.
(29:21):
So I want to, um, keepencouraging your goals.
You know, like you said, like,oh, I don't need it, I don't
have to have the big house.
I'm not saying liveextravagantly, but one of the
things I try and teach people isdon't be afraid to dream bigger
(29:42):
.
And your dream should be bigenough that it scares you a
little but you're also excitedabout it.
If you're just like you know, Iget a house and a couple of
bedrooms, yeah, that's great,that's a stepping stone dream.
How bad-ass would it be if youdo end up having whatever
business take off, it franchisesor does whatever it does, or
(30:03):
you just have that residualcashflow that you and your sons
can hey, let's go take avacation, let's go fly first
class to somewhere and see aconcert.
Like that's the freedom, it.
It's out there in the world andI think a lot of people limit
themselves and don't realizethat that's out there because it
is and you can achieve it.
You can, alex, and you thelistener, can too.
(30:26):
You really can.
There's people every day thatare doing I've seen it.
I've flown on private jets.
You know people that have theirown pilots and land in and do
and it's amazing.
And for so many people,including myself, for a time
period I thought that was like,oh, that's out of reach, that
can't happen, that's a fakestory.
But now I know multiple peoplewith their own jets and I'm like
(30:49):
, wow, you know, we go out todinner.
And my uh comedian friend,chris Porter, who should be
coming on some some point hereon the podcast, he's like it's
crazy, I go out to dinner nowwith friends and we're all
trying to pay the bill and fightand sneak and pay the bill.
And somebody was like, oh, itmust be nice to have rich people
(31:09):
.
And yeah, it's nice to haverich people, but it's also
giving people.
The more you give, the more youreceive.
My wife and I just did an eventand a foundation dinner that we
were part of this organization,the Mian Foundation.
We went to Guatemala with mywife and I to help people down
in Guatemala and we raised moneyfor them and tens of thousands
(31:31):
of dollars from some of thestuff that we did.
And guess what?
We got a phone call hey, wouldyou like to go to Disney on Ice
with your family and kids?
We got some sweet tickets andyou have a reserved parking spot
, like what.
So we have to have this amazingexperience.
So who you surround yourselfwith is very important, and
(31:52):
you're going to see that, andyou're already starting to see
it, because I see your smile andI see your life changing and
all these things.
But you might be reallysurprised, like if you go back,
what five years?
You see, wow, I can't believewhere I am now.
Fast forward another five years.
What are you going to be like?
You know?
Speaker 2 (32:11):
I'm so excited for the future.
I know that I'm going to dogreat things and that I'm going
to provide that life that I'vealways dreamed of for my sons.
I'm like let's go, I am readyfor this.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
Nice, I love it.
So people say ownership ispower.
How empowering has it been foryou to take ownership in your
life.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
Oh my gosh, I'm a completely different person.
But, to be honest, if you goback a couple of years and you
look at my social media, and Iwas on my kitchen floor crying,
worried about court to now, ohmy gosh, I in those moments took
ownership of my life and Iwalked through the fire and I
know now that I can do all thosescary things and that, no
(32:56):
matter what, me and my kids aregoing to be okay on the other
side of it.
And so that ownership is keyChanging your mindset, taking
ownership of your life, decidingwhat you want and just running
for it, because tomorrow isn'tpromised to any of us.
So if you're waiting for Fridayto live, if you're waiting for
(33:16):
the weekend to, like, dosomething fun or spend time with
your family, you're wastingyour life.
You're doing it wrong.
That's what I say Doing itwrong.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
Yeah, absolutely.
I agree wholeheartedly.
You know, every day you have todo something to chase your
dream, or that's your why.
Every day, you know, I put mygirls to bed and I'm like what's
the best thing that happened toyou today?
What did you do kind today?
What did someone do kind to youtoday?
So that they are focusing andlearning like, all right, what
(33:48):
was the best part of my day?
And giving and receiving andteaching them the real values of
life, those are the things thatleave a mark and leave a legacy
, because if you have a bunch ofmoney in the bank, oh that's
great or whatever, but havingthose moments, those
relationships, those are gamechanging and people can have
(34:12):
them.
And the asset mindset, as yousee and know, really does help
people get on track for that.
The concepts I share in therethey're real and it's not all
about me.
I mean, you know this forpeople that haven't listened to
the book on audio or haven'tread the book, check it out,
because I guarantee there'ssomething in there that's going
(34:35):
to touch you or help you ordirect you or at least at the
bare minimum, reinforcesomething that you already know.
There are good things out there.
So Alex you are just radiatingthis energy.
Now, that's so different.
What would you suggest peopledo to get that energy that you
(35:02):
have now, like that transitionfrom that depression, anxiety
energy into this amazing growthmindset person that you are
today?
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Let's give them the listeners some tips and
viewpoints from Alex.
So I like to tell the moms thatcome to me for coaching and to
build a business.
I like to tell them to focus onthemselves first and foremost
your health, your wellness, yourmindset.
You need to cut everybody out,but even for a short amount of
(35:35):
time, cut out anything that'snegative, because it does change
your life.
It really does change your lifewhen you're super laser focused
on your dreams.
I always tell them, I give themhomework on our first strategy
session and one of the pieces ofhomework is to go read your
book, because it's going tochange their mindset by the next
(35:55):
time that they come and theymeet with me.
And I also tell them write downyour dream life on a piece of
paper.
What does your perfect lifelook like when you wake up in
the morning?
What does it feel like?
How much money do you have thatyou're comfortable?
What are you and your kidsdoing?
What are you doing for work?
Make a plan to get that andthen say no to everything else.
(36:17):
That isn't that.
And by the time that they comeback to me, they're like I feel
so much better and I'm like yeah, I know.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
I love it.
Yeah, I know so.
So when I think that's soamazing and powerful.
So what's the biggest thing yousee from like, the first
meeting to the second meeting?
When you say, like you givethem the homework assignment.
Speaker 2 (36:42):
Yeah, their confidence level and that's what
I look for is the confidencelevel.
The first meeting they'realways, like you know, sitting
down in their chair.
They're afraid to speak to me.
Their why isn't very big,they're just fearful.
And then they do the homeworkand they come back and they're
like, okay, I feel good, my whyis X, y, z and I'm ready to run.
(37:04):
Your why has to be bigger thanyour fear it has to be,
otherwise you're just not goingto build the life they want.
So make sure that your why isworth all the hard work that you
need to put in to achieve yourdreams.
And my why was my children?
Was getting our income up, wasgetting us out of California and
(37:25):
to safety, so that my kids werehappy.
They are thriving, it's worthit fantastic.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
I love it.
And confidence is so importantand I think people you know lack
confidence because of fear.
You know, and I I say fear isfalse evidence appearing real,
because you're projecting whenyou have fear it is something
that may happen in the future.
Because you're thinking likeI'm afraid to go on a plane
(37:53):
because Because why it may crashor this might happen.
But don't focus on that.
Do the what if, what if it wasan amazing flight and I got to
have this incredible vacation atthe other end of the
destination?
Play tricks on you andsometimes you just need to, like
(38:18):
you said, take time to yourselfand figure out your why.
We all need that, even myself.
Sometimes I need to step aside.
Someone recently shared you know, go for a walk as a health
thing, but then, as we werediscussing more and more, going
for a walk is also a mentalthing, because you get your
blood flowing and now you'rejust you're walking, so your
mind starts analyzing things andprocessing stuff and you can
(38:41):
take things in.
So going for a walk is verypowerful.
So if you're trying to figureout your why, go for a walk.
See what's important, see whatcomes up, journal.
You know these things can help.
Now do you do a lot ofjournaling.
Speaker 2 (38:56):
I do twice a day, every day, and I also do two
walks per day too.
I wake up early, I go for awalk, I have it stacked, so I'm
walking, I'm getting my steps in, but I'm also listening to a
motivational podcast so that itit um, trains my brain for the
day.
I'm in a positive mindset.
I come home, I turn up themusic, I dance around my house,
(39:17):
I don't care if I look stupid.
I'm pumping myself up to beable to help the other moms or
to help my kids with theirhomeschool work, whatever it is.
I want to be the best, mostpositive version of myself for
everybody around me.
It's important and you weretalking about that.
What if people say that all thetime?
What if I fail?
What if I can't do this?
That used to be me every day ofmy life, and then one day I
(39:40):
woke up and I was like, what ifI win?
What if I succeed?
You know what if I make it?
And that changes the game?
You got to do that.
Speaker 1 (39:51):
Absolutely.
That's why I talk about thepage master concept.
Like turn the page in your head.
Don't keep reading that samesame thing over and over again,
like, oh, I can't, or oh, thishappened, or you know, here I am
, whatever it may be, you'restuck on that page.
Turn it, you know.
That's one of the great thingsabout being a human being and
the capacity of our brain andour mind, like you and I, right
(40:22):
now, could talk about anythingyou want to talk about.
You know, hey, let's talk aboutelephants in Africa.
Oh, no, wait, let's talk about.
You know what happenedyesterday.
You know, with the weather, ordid you see a bumblebee is not
supposed to fly.
You know, because of whateverphysics like, we have that
ability, and learning that youcan have that self-awareness to
change your mind is soempowering.
So, while we're on this topic,I want to ask you because you're
(40:42):
a human being and the struggleis real for all of us, including
me, and I wrote the damn book.
But when you have fear anddoubt come in.
How do you combat that now?
Like, what do you, what stepsdo you take when those thoughts,
you know, start trying to eatback in there?
Where do you go?
Or what do you do?
Speaker 2 (41:00):
Yeah.
So every day there's still alittle bit of fear that creeps
in of you know the what if it'sgoing to go wrong?
Um, my go-to is to put on myheadphones and go for a walk.
I'm just really big on thatright now.
It helps center me so much.
But also dancing.
I like to dance around my house.
I like to turn my music up atfull blast.
(41:22):
There's something about justlike dancing that really shakes
out that fear and anxiety andthen you can kind of look at the
situation and realize it's notthat bad.
There's always a solution.
You just have to shake thatshit off first to be able to see
it.
You know what?
Speaker 1 (41:38):
I mean, I love it.
Shake that shit off.
I love it.
That's great.
That might be a new thing I useShake that shit off, come on,
let's go.
But yeah, the, the energy thingand the vibrations are so
important.
You know, if you're sitting onthe couch and you're just like
balled up with a blanket andyou're like, oh, this sucks,
(42:02):
yeah, you're stuck on that,you're stuck in that mode,
everybody has a favorite song,damn it.
Put on your favorite song,crank it up, like you said,
start moving.
There's science behind it.
Up like you said, start moving.
There's science behind it.
Um, I forget who said it andI'm so sorry, but um, talked
about, like the um, the cells.
(42:23):
They release this hope moleculeor good feeling and dopamine
when you like.
Move around and you exerciseand that's a science.
You know scientific evidencethat proves movement.
So move, move.
Tony Robbins talks about thatpriming and getting up, move,
get things happening.
So I love that you use that.
So for all you listeners outthere, if you're having a suck
(42:45):
day, get out there and take awalk, move, listen to some music
, dance around your house.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
Motion creates emotion, so move that ass I love
it.
Speaker 1 (42:59):
Alex.
We're gonna see more dancingvideos of the asset mindset now,
dancing with my cows or mychickens, I get, we get, uh, 13
baby chicken content.
Speaker 2 (43:12):
okay, I would love to see that content.
Okay, please do that.
Speaker 1 (43:16):
Maybe I'll send you a DM with it or something, please
.
And laughter let's talk aboutlaughter and joy.
How much more laughter and joydo you have right now?
Speaker 2 (43:34):
Because you've been able to shift that mindset of
yours so much.
I annoy my children.
I'll be very honest with you, Iannoy them.
So have you ever heard the termrotting?
Where people rot, they like siton the couch or they get in bed
and they completely zone outand they Netflix for hours and
hours.
That used to be me.
There wasn't joy in my homeLike when I was trying to leave
California.
There wasn't joy in my homeLike when I was trying to leave
(43:55):
California.
That battle in family courtrobbed me of every ounce of joy
and money I had, and so I did alot of rotting.
I still took care of my kids,we still did all the things, but
there was no laughter or joy ordancing around my house.
And now that's all I do becauseI feel happy.
(44:15):
So I'm all about the joy andlaughter.
Speaker 1 (44:20):
I love it.
I love it.
My wife teases me sometimesbecause she's like you don't
know what it's like living withthe asset mindset Cause.
She's like how are you doing?
I'm like, terrific, let's go.
You know, let's be.
She's like, really, babe, youknow, I'm brushing my teeth, I
just woke up and I'm like it'sgoing to be a terrific day, it's
fantastic, you know.
She's like, oh, you're too much.
Sometimes I'm like, yeah, butwhat you hate about me, you love
(44:44):
about me.
Speaker 2 (44:47):
Yeah, that's so funny .
I actually have a friend.
When I was back, when I hadjust left and I was homeless
with my kids, and she said thatI could stay at her house for
two weeks while I was trying tofigure stuff out.
Those two weeks turned intoeight months.
She was an angel for letting mestay.
But I tried really hard to bepositive, like just a ray of
(45:08):
sunshine every day, becauseotherwise how are you going to
get through it?
And every day she would go.
You are so positive.
Like what?
How are you so positive?
I don't even like that.
I'm like really have to bepositive.
Do you want me walking aroundyour house crying all day long
Cause I could or I could be like, hey, we're going to have a
great day, let's turn on themusic and let's dance it out?
So some people really like thatpositivity and it rubs some
(45:30):
people the wrong way, for sure.
Speaker 1 (45:32):
No, it definitely.
I mean, my wife's cool with it.
She laughs at it, we make funabout it.
You know sharing these stories,but yeah, it does rub some
people the wrong way andhonestly, I think it's because
they're not ready.
They're not ready for thatgrowth or to take that step with
their mindset.
Cause, really, are you going tobe mad at someone for being
happy, right, like, come onpeople Like, don't you want to
(45:55):
be around someone that's happyor do you want to be around
someone that's angry ordepressed?
I don't think that's a hardthing to figure out and answer
is it?
Is it hard?
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (46:07):
no, not at all.
I have people actually whodespise me on social media
because I'm happy now they, theyliked me better when I was
crying on my kitchen floor notknowing how I was going to
survive, what I was goingthrough, and that's weird,
that's like weird energy to haveright.
Speaker 1 (46:24):
Totally weird energy.
And that's the thing.
Just because you have an assetmindset, philosophy and you're
living that way, it doesn't meanyou're not going to deal with
negative energy.
It's out there, it's a part ofthe world, you know.
It's part of the humancondition.
The struggle is real foreverybody.
There's going to be days whereit's a thunderstorm.
There's going to be a day whereit's beautiful, sunny, with
white, puffy clouds.
But you know that's just partof the game and understanding
(46:49):
where you're at in the journey.
You know, hey, if it's thistype of day today, guess what
Tomorrow's going to be different, it'll be better.
You know, hey, if it's thistype of day today, guess what
Tomorrow is going to bedifferent, it'll be better.
And you can always findsomething good.
You know they say the silverlining in the cloud.
At first, when I was younger, Iwas like, yeah, that's a bunch
of bullshit.
You know the silver lining.
But now there really is.
(47:10):
I mean, I was like you in a notvery good relationship.
You know, it was bad.
I ended up getting divorced.
At that point I thought it wasthe worst thing ever.
You know, I just got out of themilitary to start a family with
my wife and that fell apart.
But then I met my current wife,who's amazing, and I have three
(47:31):
kids that are amazing and whereI am, and you know what.
I wouldn't change a thing.
Now you know I don't want to goback to that because I amazing
and where I am, and you knowwhat.
I wouldn't change a thing.
Now you know I don't want to goback to that because I'm happy
where I'm at and it's one ofthose things that people need to
realize that when something badhappens, that's not defining
your life.
That's that moment in time andthat moment will pass, just like
(47:52):
every other bad moment you'vealready had in your life.
You know, if you're alive rightnow, there's nobody that's
walking this earth unless you'rejust a brand spanking new
newborn, and even that you knowyou just were born.
That's kind of traumatic.
So you know you're going tohave bad things happen to you.
So just, you learn to deal withit and you grow, and those are
lessons.
So I want to ask all ourlisteners right now to just
(48:17):
pause, go to the description andplease check out Alex Freedom
Mama, follow her, check out herbusiness, reach out to her if
you're a mom or you knowsomeone's struggling and she's
inspired.
You Check out her informationin the description and you'll be
able to contact her.
She's an amazing person.
And also, please follow, likeand subscribe to the Asset
(48:41):
Mindset podcast.
And while I just stumbled there,I'm going to share a little bit
something on myself.
I don't always do that, but Iwas in speech class up until
fifth grade and had a problempronouncing things and sometimes
would come out just like it didthere.
You know what you push throughit.
You know you got to do it.
(49:02):
I've gotten a lot better, butoccasionally I still struggle
with speaking, you know, but I'ma speaker.
I've got paid to speak in frontof hundreds of people.
So, with that being said,understand, listeners, you can
do so much more than you realize.
You absolutely can.
You are in control of yourdestiny more than anyone else,
(49:25):
anyone else.
It's you.
You own the power.
Alex, before we go and wrap uptoday's podcast, I want to give
you another moment to sharepodcast.
I want to give you anothermoment to share, to say anything
whatever you want to haveexpressed to the Asset Mindset
podcast listeners.
Speaker 2 (49:42):
Thank you so much.
Really, I want the moms outthere who are listening and
they're struggling and they'remaybe have left abuse or they're
just in a situation where theydon't know how they're going to
see through, or they're just ina situation where they don't
know how they're going to seethrough.
Then you can rebuild your life.
You're absolutely capable, youare strong and I'm cheering for
(50:03):
you.
My inbox is always open.
You don't have to join me inbusiness to get advice from me
or friendship from me.
You are your own greatest asset.
Speaker 1 (50:20):
So let's fucking go.
Yes, and I love when you usethe asset mindset quotes.
Awesome, alex, it's been ablast, it's been so much fun.
Maybe we'll do this againsometime.
I'm hoping you'll say yes if wedo decide and it works with our
schedules, because you'reinspiring and helping people,
and that's what the assetmindset is all about is helping
(50:40):
people and being a positiveperson in this world that's full
of chaos and a lot of evil.
So, once again, please like,subscribe, follow the Asset
Mindset Podcast.
You can find it on YouTube,spotify or you can always go to
theassetmindsetcom for moreinformation.
Remember, own your power.
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