June 23, 2025 • 51 mins
Explore the transformative power of the asset mindset with DeAndre McDonald and Daniel Fielding. Learn how to overcome challenges, embrace growth, and leverage mentorship for personal and professional success. This episode offers valuable insights into shifting perspectives and turning failure into feedback.
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Chapters
0:00 - Introduction and Welcome
2:15 - Beyond the Trek: Mission and Vision
5:30 - Pivotal Life Moments
15:45 - The Power of Mentorship
25:00 - Overcoming Challenges and Adversity
35:20 - Embracing Discomfort for Growth
45:10 - Failure as Feedback
55:00 - Community and Responsibility
1:05:30 - Final Thoughts and Takeaways
1:10:00 - Call to Action
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Website: beyondthetrek.co
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
well, mac, it's great to uh have you here.
Thank you for coming on, thankyou for sharing your time.
Time is valuable we all knowthat, and, uh, I did a little
research and boy I love whatyou're doing.
It goes right along with whatI'm trying to share with people,
and take our motto Deo PressurLiber, you know, to free the
oppressed, or free fromoppression, to the civilian
(00:30):
world where people oppressthemselves at their own way of
thinking.
And I'm trying to change thatwith the asset mindset, and I
see you making a lot of changeswith all the work you're doing.
And I'm just so honored to havethe co-founder of Beyond the
Trek on the Asset Mindset, soit's an honor to have you here.
Welcome to the show.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
It's absolutely an honor one to be invited to your
show, knowing that we've allbeen cut from some of the same
cloth.
What you bring to the tablethis time is I look at it as an
investment, not just for your,what you're doing and for those
who are going to tune into thepodcast and eventually hire you
(01:12):
for the great work that you'regoing to bring For me.
I'm just appreciative that youyou sent the invitation.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Oh well, well-deserved invitation.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
You're doing great things, so I want to start off,
tell us a little bit aboutBeyond the Track and what you're
doing and what you're teachingpeople through that discipline
(01:47):
approach when we are facinghardships, and navigating those
hardships, and taking thosestories one to not just
individuals but to organizations, on how they can overcome those
things and then build betterteams to run more efficiently,
so that they not are onlyaccountable for themselves but
they are also accountable forthose people that depend on them
and so they can be, you know,an outreach to not just their
(02:09):
organization but their communityat large.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
Love it.
So I'm going to get into somenitty gritty here.
What was the single hardestmoment in your life where you
realized that you needed to havea mindset to change the outcome
or the path that you were on?
Like you were ready to breakdown or something going wrong.
This crazy moment and theswitch finally clicked and
(02:34):
you're like you know what?
I need to have the rightmindset to get out of this or
get through this or whatever youneeded to do.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
All right.
So I'm going to try to give youa couple of different ones,
because I think one is it willnot capture all of it.
If you will, okay, let's see.
The first time we're at it it'slike, hey, you know what I have
to get out of this situation?
It was just before I joined theArmy.
(03:03):
I was working in a warehouse inSolon Ohio packing retaining
rings, and there was a.
There was a guy named Bob whodid independent wrestling at
night and I kept talking aboutyou know, I'm gonna join the
army, like people do, like I'mgonna join the army.
And Bob said he was like youkeep talking about it, you'll
never do it.
And once he said that he walkedaway and I had like a
(03:27):
premonition, if you will, andsaw myself as a 40-year-old man
packing boxes in a warehouse inSolon Ohio, right outside of
Cleburne.
That day I went to my boss andI said I need to get out of here
.
I need to get out of here.
So he let me go and I wentright to the recruiting station
and that was in March of 2001.
(03:50):
April 21st 2001,.
I was in basic training.
So that was like, hey, I don'twant this, this lifestyle,
because that was a year after Igraduated from high school and
so, if we fast forward throughmy army time, I had just got
back from my first deployment toKuwait.
(04:10):
I was a logistics guy and abuddy of mine said, hey, let's
go to selection.
And I said, ok, roger, you knowlike this is, I'll do it.
You know, like, just asmotivated as it as ever, I'm
going to do it.
So I get past that point.
I'm in language school and I'mhaving a difficult time through
French, and Dwayne Legg was amedic that was in going through
(04:32):
language school with me and Ihad this I don't care, cleveland
kid attitude because I wasstruggling and I kind of I found
that that was my safety.
If I said, I don't care, thepeople won't, they won't like
reach in a little bit more.
But Dwayne called me on mysafety.
If I sat on care, the peoplewon't, they won't uh, like reach
in a little bit more.
But Dwayne called me on my bull.
He did call me on my bullshit,and so, dwayne, what he did was
like, hey, mac, you know, duringlunch could you hang back?
(04:54):
And I said absolutely.
So Dwayne was a white dude fromColorado and uh, he said, hey,
man, man, you're a good dude butyou're fucking stupid.
Oh oh, okay, he said the factis, good people willing to help
you but you're not willing tosay when you need help and
you're struggling, versusgetting the help you need.
(05:16):
So he called me on it andthat's when I had to barrel down
and really focus on learningFrench so I can pass the Q
course and eventually go off tothird special forces group and,
um, the third story.
I mean it really changed mylife, that trajectory, because I
was able to complete that, likea lot of people who were not
(05:37):
able to complete some of thethings in training to be able to
be successful.
And it was in ranger school,freaking, that completed the Q
course.
About a year and a half later Ifound myself in Ranger School.
My team started at the time.
I had, I had volunteered, youknow, like most people, like hey
, man, I already did this, I'mnot going to, I'm going to do
Ranger School and I decided thisis what I wanted to do.
(05:57):
I'm in a mountain phase in.
It was January of 2007.
And at the end of January I'min in in Dahlonega, georgia, and
I'm freaking, falling up themountain and I was just pissed,
had a terrible attitude and Iremember this lieutenant.
He had walked up to me withthis like little daily bread.
(06:20):
You know, you get those littledaily breads and encouraging
words and I slipped the mountainand.
I smacked my face on the side ofthe mountain and I said I'm
going to take this stick andstick it in the freaking RI's
eye.
Now that's how pissed I was.
And then RI looked at me andwas like what'd you say, ranger?
I said no, I love RI's, youknow like they're the best
people ever.
(06:45):
So he walks away and I forgetthe lieutenant's name, but he
passed me off as Daily Bread andit was talking about
complaining and like, dude, ifyou're always freaking
complaining, when are you goingto really take responsibility
for your own actions?
And it was that time was like,hey, if I don't take
responsibility, I could likerecycle.
And if you recycle the storiesthat you hear and I was told by
my team sergeant in my company,commander, when I left to go to
Ranger School you fail, don'tcome back.
(07:07):
And I was like failure was notan option.
I was doing 61 days and thatwas it.
I was not recycling anybodyphase.
And so I got my stuff together.
I really like engage and sayyou know what?
I'm here for a purpose.
I volunteered to go one, but myteam started noticing.
He said, hey, but you're goingto like smooth out some of your
(07:27):
rough edges.
And it helped me smooth some ofmy rough edges.
I came from a non-combat armsbackground and so, yeah, going
through the Q course, being ingroup for a while, was great,
but I needed that extraexperience to show me some
things about my character that Icouldn't see.
You know, in the midst ofwearing your beret around, dudes
(07:50):
like, oh you know, when youwalk on post people like, oh,
this dude's like a walking God,and then you get to a place
where everybody's the same againYou're just a freaking arasa
number and you're not a God, anumber, and you're not a god.
You're a dude slipping up theside of the mountain who's
whining and complaining whileeverybody else is kind of
sucking it up and going throughthe same process you were going
(08:11):
through.
And, um, that was when I waslike, hey, you know what, can't
complain.
And I think the last story fastforward I had an opportunity to
go to naval post graduateschool and a comment that um,
first arnzenko said in selectionit's like don't let the monkey
get on your back.
And he's on your back and he'slike, he's like he's telling
(08:32):
you're lost and you believe himand you start walking around in
circles.
So I'm in naval postgraduateschool, my first couple of
classes.
They, hey, you have about ahundred pages to read at night
on these classes and I freakingscreamed in my office and in
Monterey like I have to do this.
And I was like if I don't dothis, I will fail.
(08:55):
It's like you got to stay uplate and so I had to really
figure it out Like, how do, howdo you read for a master's
degree to be able to do thatamount of classes in 18 months,
to be successful and back in tohave a grad degree?
And those are four uniquestories that I had to really
tell me like, hey, kick it inthe next year, you can do it.
(09:16):
You have everything in you.
You're not the only individualhere by yourself and one you
have that I had the GPA to getthere.
I you know, like the record, uh, my record spoke for itself so
I had to adapt to.
But that was another testinground for myself.
That really drove back to mychildhood, when I was in fifth
(09:37):
grade, and I realized that itwas an oxymoron that my fifth
grade teacher said when I got,like you're going to the sixth
grade and I laughed at her faceand she was like you'll never
amount to anything, and so itwasn't until I had my.
Your thesis is complete.
And I opened up my thesiscomplete, I was like, ah, you
said it negative, I'm not goingto amount to anything.
(09:57):
I have something that you knowlady probably did, or whatever,
but it allowed me to see that,hey, you're capable, you're
capable to go.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
So no, those are great stories and I think
there's a there's a lot there tochew on.
I mean, there's differentchapters of your life and the
different growth and I love thatyou're able to share all these
things here on the podcast soother people understand that.
All right, you just talkedabout you were a green beret,
(10:28):
you're long tab and you went toranger school when you were back
to a nobody and you were likeall complaining and whining,
like it doesn't matter who youare.
The struggle is real.
It's a constant battle in life.
Like you're a human being,you're alive.
You're going to have struggles.
Now how do you deal with them?
That's what really matters.
Like I say in my book, the assetmindset your, your mind is your
greatest weapon or your tool,or you are your greatest asset.
(10:51):
Can you elaborate more intothat?
Because I think everything youjust shared with the audience
was very powerful, that youended up becoming your greatest
asset by changing your mindset,and once you did that, that's
when you became successful.
So what helps or what shiftswere made that you can help give
(11:13):
the listeners an understandingof how that works and how it
worked in you?
Speaker 2 (11:19):
So great question one , I'm glad, great question One.
And when I think back when Iwas a E4 and just my buddy,
dominic Johnson, say, hey, let'sgo to selection, well, 92
alphas and COSCOM leg side ofthe post one were not jumping on
an aircraft.
And it was at that time it was2003 when we talked about that
(11:44):
decision after coming out of ourdeployment and I was like, can
I do this Right?
Because at that time, uh, therewas a, there was a, uh E5, my
unit who had, you know I'll getto that point but uh, to which
your question, she said herhusband was in seventh group and
they were running the range.
(12:06):
So my only uh like connectionwith SF guys at at the time I
didn't grow up reading booksabout sf dudes.
I didn't watch, you know, greenberet movies until I was after
I graduated the course.
So my exposure was those guyson the range and it was like a
one day on the range.
Oh, that's cool, they'recalling, calling Danny's,
calling Mac by his first name,and I was like that sounds cool.
(12:29):
But now it's like, hey, whatare you going to?
What do you have to do to getthere?
And one of the things on therewas like climbing a rope, like I
worked out, but I wasn't reallyclimbing a rope.
So how do I do that?
I started.
I started to identify likethese are tasks I have to
complete.
That I started.
I started to identify likethese are tasks I have to
complete.
How do I complete those tasks?
And so what I started to do islearn the skills that I didn't
(12:49):
already have.
I learned an op order, reallyshort, at a company commander at
the time, captain Flood, andshe.
She explained to me this iswhat an op order you know is and
this is how you break down anop order.
So for me, my mind, I had tosay, all right, for me to do
this, I have to learn this skill, versus say that I'm, I'm, I'm
(13:11):
able to, I'm unable to do itbecause I don't have the skill.
I say, well, I identify mydeficit and now allow me to to
make that an asset versus it isalways going to remain a deficit
for me, an asset versus it isalways going to remain a deficit
for me.
So that mind shit came a lotearly.
So I sat there when it came topatrolling, like I took a little
(13:32):
freaking those, those littlearmy men that stood still and I
briefed my op order to them,like that's, that's, that's what
I was doing to myself, in in,in helping me understand, like,
hey, if a team leader is goingto, this is how a team leader is
going to communicate.
If I'm telling a rifleman to godo this, this is what the
rifleman is going to do.
And so I had to put myself inthat environment, like in my
(13:54):
head and then on those littlemodels before I found myself in
that environment, like actuallydoing it, not only with our
soldiers but with foreignnationals around the world.
So it was really changing theway I thought and I think one of
the great things all of uswatched the news and a lot of us
(14:17):
saw like Black Lives Matter andnot throwing shade on anybody
on any side.
My mom never.
My mom didn't graduate fromhigh school, but she never
allowed me to say that Icouldn't.
Like I came from a drug dealingmom, a dad that sold drugs, did
drugs, and that wasn't reallyaround to where I had to figure
(14:40):
it out.
I had to develop a mindset thatsaid, hey, I have to do better
for me.
No one has a cape that's goingto save me at this time.
So I had to develop thoseskills.
So then I realized that I, thatI was my greatest asset, which
is really scary, right Too?
Speaker 1 (15:00):
Oh, that ownership yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Because then it's like it, it kind of it uh hinges
on your success when you takingthe time, and so I had to learn
over time how to take time andhow to be humble when I'm taking
that time, to learn a new skill, to be able to get to that goal
that I set for myself.
Speaker 1 (15:22):
That's fantastic, that's powerful stuff and I love
the like.
I need to figure out mydeficits, like how do I?
Instead of saying like, oh, Ican't do this, I can't.
Or when you shared storieswhere you were getting to the
point or close to I can't, youthen figured out all right, how
do I do this?
I need to change my attitude, Ineed to change my habits, I
(15:43):
need to change what I'm doing, Ineed to change my mindset so
that, right, there is gettingout of your comfort zone a
little bit and please share,because people need to
understand.
Getting out of your comfortzone is where growth really
happens.
You're not going to grow if youstay in your little safe circle
(16:04):
.
So let's talk about that.
Mac, oh man.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
It's like uh, can I have, like a house, a tattoo, uh
, tattoo, you know, all thisstuff to get out of comfort zone
, like I did, you know, like I'mdoing it, I'm still doing it,
which is such a weird thing, butI think it's kind of the
process of growth.
Um, if I it's not that I needsomething to feel alive, but I
(16:30):
think friction allows me to knowthat I'm still alive.
And if that, if that makessense, I need some of that
friction, some of that mentalgrowth.
I was on a um a call last night.
I finished up uh a mindfulleader course for mindfulness.
And and the lady asked and sowhat are you doing?
You know what's kind of nextfor you?
I said, based on what I, myexperience with mindfulness, I
(16:52):
like I have four books that I'mreading right now on meditation.
You know, like four books.
She was like, well, you knowpace yourself.
I, you know, I didn't tell herI'm pacing myself.
I'm reading kind of a chapter ata time from each book, cause
there's there's presentingdifferent perspectives, but I'm
trying to understand somethingthat I quite, you know, really
can't put words on for thisexperience, because I know, you
(17:17):
know, as far as mindset isconcerned, like it is helping me
grow.
So I need to put myself alittle uncomfortable, like I
need to read where people have.
This has been their path for 40or 50 years and I haven't been
along that path.
So now I'm going to put myselfin a situation where I'm a
little uncomfortable because Idon't, I just don't know what I
(17:38):
don't know, but now I need tolearn what I really don't know.
Um, so that's, that's one thingand uh, the the other is I'm
about to get ready to start backfor another master's degree in
school counseling.
I took a break for a whilebecause I thought about, like,
some different priorities.
But helping out another, ayoung man at school, cause I'm a
(18:01):
teacher in my next full-timecareer for right now, and I was
able to help him out.
But I said, how do I?
How I uh, basically help thembetter than being in a classroom
as a teacher, like being acounselor, to help.
You know, show them like, hey,man, life will present
challenges and I'm not going touse to say life is not easy.
(18:22):
Life just has challenges,because there's times that, like
we're at the beach Long as wehave no tsunami, life is pretty
easy.
You know so and I'm not goingto lie Like that's easy right
now.
Like we have electricity, lifeis pretty easy.
I'm not going out building afire for for light or or how I'm
going to cook food, so but howdo I help myself grow?
In a way I do that is, I putmyself in positions where it's
(18:44):
going to cause me to grow andworking full-time.
That's a lot, that's it's a loton my plate, but it's teaching
me.
How do I balance my time, youknow, and honoring that time.
So I hope that answered thequestion.
If it didn't, um, uh, because Iknow you're doing great, man.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
It is awesome.
You totally answered it becauseyou're sharing and explaining
how to make the changes.
You, you got to beuncomfortable and you're taking
on large tasks.
And those large tasks like hey,some people go into school
full-time.
That's overwhelming, you know.
But working a full-time job too, You're here on the podcast
(19:24):
with me making time.
I love and I mean when I say Ilove, I love the fact that
you're going to be a counselor,when I say I love, I love the
fact that you're going to be acounselor because you have a
great story and people needmentorship, because not
everybody has someone that canlead them down the path or show
them the path or point the pathto hey, have this growth or
(19:45):
positive mindset or what I deemthe asset mindset.
So can you share some mentorsor people that kind of lit the
way or showed you the way andhow that changed you, so maybe
our listeners can realize theimportance of mentors so, uh,
(20:07):
two of the ones that come cometo mind right now it's a kelly
ke Cole.
Speaker 2 (20:10):
He's a retired Lieutenant Colonel civil affairs
guy, and then Colonel Hayes,also retired mentor civil
affairs guy as well.
So when I was going to churchback in Fayetteville, kelly Cole
, white guy from middle ofAmerica, he just came up to me
one day because he knew I was ingroup and he was like hey, I
hear you're about to go to ROTC.
(20:32):
You know you should, you shouldconsider civil affairs.
And I was like Kelly, why?
He's like we ain't got nobrother, you know.
But I say OK.
So it was kind of like that,the interest, that conversation.
And every time I would see himon like a Wednesday for church
or Sunday, we would haveconversations.
And then I saw how he wastreating his wife.
I saw how he was treating hiswife.
You go to Kelly's house.
Kelly house was like you know,united Nations, there is
(20:55):
different.
There wasn't like, hey, I justtake care of my white kids.
Kelly was taking care of kidsthat didn't belong to him.
They were like, hey, these aremy boys right here.
And he really spent time as Ihit.
This is what a dad does.
This is like this is the areaswhere I felt that, not only that
, I can call kelly and ask himhey, kelly, I am about to you
(21:16):
know, like get ready to sign myoer, what are the things that I
need to consult?
He was like, oh okay, like,let's, let's look at what's
written here.
And so he was like not only waswritten, but how do you
communicate with um leadership?
So that was the thing thatkelly kind of instilled in me.
And and then Colonel Hayes, atthe time when he was my company
commander, when I was at Stewart, because we had a civil affairs
(21:38):
company that was separate fromour brigade at Stewart, and I
remember because I always liketo joke and that's just who I am
, so I joke with a commander orwhatever somebody in leadership.
And he had brought me in and hejust said hey, some people you
better be read their face.
And he brought me in and hejust said hey, you know some
(22:11):
people you doing about your,what do you where you want to go
next?
And he was like I just got, hehad just graduated from Naples
graduate school, so he wastelling me about his experience
on.
Hey, this is what success lookslike when you're in leadership
and what you need to do to beable to get to that goal,
because this team time will runout.
To be able to get to that goal,because this team time will run
(22:32):
out, what do you do next?
You know what does that looklike.
And being able to get on thephone before he before I ended
up in this company as mycommander I can like hey, these
are the things that I, that I'mupset about, that I see, and he
would, even though he's in thesame unit, he would separate
himself If you were outside theunit and have a conversation
(23:00):
with me like a man, excuse me,man to man, but officer to
officer.
Uh, when I had trouble um, someof us you know they're because
of the career you sacrifice onemarriage, uh, because of career,
that.
And then that happened.
But he sat prior to things likecompletely falling apart, was,
hey, let's, let's walk through.
Let me show you some of theareas that I went wrong and how
me and my wife were able to comeback from that.
And he took his time to do that.
So it wasn't like, hey, I'mjust going to mentor you for
(23:22):
your military career, like I'mgoing to help mentor you through
life.
And Kelly did the same thingwhen I was driving back from
California in the midst, beforeI knew my, my, my marriage was
over.
I had no clue at the time uh,my first marriage.
But I stayed in his, his house,with my family and he was
always like tables open, what'sgoing on at home?
(23:45):
You know, what are you guysgoing through?
Before I knew it, I'm like, hey, things look good.
You know, ex-wife was likeclosed off, but he were trying
to to mentor you past just acareer, but in life in general.
When I thought about getting outas a young captain, I called
Kelly.
He was like do you have sixmonths saved?
I said no.
(24:07):
He said the dumbest thing I'veever.
You have a wife and three kidsand you're going to get out and
you're going to leave an arm.
And I was like well, it lookslike we're going back to the
drawing board and work on ourplan.
So I say that because mentorshipis extremely important.
They're not going to allow youto just make a rash decision
(24:31):
without taking some time andthinking through your plan.
Mentors are going to say, heylook, this is what I did, but
I'm not giving you this as myprescription, I'm just showing
you how I had to navigatethrough challenges, and then
they're also challenging.
If you're trying to go X, thenyou need to do these things,
because if you're not doingthese things, as a mentor, I
(24:55):
can't, you know, provide youguidance if you're not willing
to listen for your success.
Because you know like and I'mputting in that position now for
my the three youngest, becausemy wife and I, now that are
married it is a blended family,and so what?
The thing that we're dealingwith right now is I'm telling my
(25:16):
kids like I am coming to becomemore of a God.
You're becoming a teenager.
Yes, I'm your parent, but I'mmore of your God.
I am not going to be like.
This is what you would do,because it's providing that
mentorship, and I think it'sextremely important, especially
when we're dealing with a newgeneration of young men and
women coming up.
(25:36):
If we don't find a way toinitiate them and I think
mentors do that they, if theycan't put you through hardship,
they'll point you in a directiontoward hardship For your
initiation rights, and that'swhat mentors are able to do
absolutely, and one of thethings I want people listeners
(25:58):
to hear is that if you noticewhen max talking is, the mentors
made time.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
When you find someone in your life that's a mentor,
they will make time, they willtake the time and you're worth
their time.
So also don't waste their time.
If someone's mentoring you,respect their, their time,
respect what they're doing,because they're giving you a
gift.
I mean it can change your life.
One mentor, one right personand I'm sure you know your
(26:29):
mentors change your life.
You're a different officer thanyou would have been because of
your mentors and you probablydid a much better job.
You learn from other people'smistakes, so you didn't make
your own.
I mean, we're all going to makeour own anyways, but you can
avoid the pitfalls from thementor teaching you Be like hey,
this was really bad, I'vescrewed this up, don't do this.
(26:52):
So please realize that you havementors out there available to
you and if you don't, you can gofind them.
They're out there becausementors are doers.
They're out there doingsomething, looking for somebody
that is doing what you want todo or reaching goals or levels
that you want to reach, and talkto them, see where it goes,
(27:13):
because they can change yourlife.
One person can just absolutelyopen the door for you.
One decision, one opportunitythat you take advantage of.
I want to now ask was there anopportunity?
I know you talked about joiningthe military.
You know you had that guy, theold guy, like oh, it forever
changed your trajectory and youare so grateful you did it.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
Because if you didn't do is when I went to the
recruiting station.
I went to the national guardrecruiting station and so, uh,
that opera.
So going through basic training, it was my dream.
I did not know that until I wasin ranger school when I had a
flashback to when we're livingin the projects and I was inside
a washing machine like it wasmy tank.
(28:25):
So me and my brother would likehe would try to work on pipes,
I would be in a washing machinelike this is my tank and love it
.
So when I went through basic I'mhaving a blast and I realized,
hey, basic is about to come to aclose and you're going to ait.
And then you got to go back tocleveland and I was like I'm
(28:48):
having too much fun for this.
And so, uh, the drill sergeantI forget which one told me at
ait.
He said, hey, look man, uh, ifyou, you let them know that you
have to take care of your family, they probably let you out that
contract and you can probablyend up joining the afternoon.
So I, you know, said I had youknow it's times in the past I've
(29:10):
sent my mom money.
So, technically, did I takecare of my family?
Absolutely, but it it opened meup.
Getting a brag was like an eyeopener because I was around
people at least some people whowanted to be where they wanted
to be.
Then other people like tryingto find something different.
(29:31):
And I mentioned I mentionedDominic earlier.
Dominic and I went to on Hunternot Hunter freaking Simmons
army airfield at the time.
And we were talking to freakingpilots because we were trying to
figure the next thing out Like,hey, what's what else we want
to do?
Prior to going to selection.
We talked to pilots and they'relike hey, you know, flying air,
(29:54):
you know helicopters is great,but you know I can blow up
without you knowing it.
And we're like not, that,that's not what we want to do,
don't want to die, you know, inin a ball of flames.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
Let's figure something else out.
Yeah, and there's no ieds.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
You'd never drive around in the infantry and just
blow up in a ball of flames.
No, that is true, but you don'tput that together until you
find yourself on that.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
You didn't know, I know I just it's just funny
thing because that was always mygreatest fear.
When you hit that, you just hitsomething in my head.
Like you know I I didn't mindlike getting a firefight, get
shot.
Just don't fucking blow me up,like I want a chance, like I
don't get an option.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
Yeah, sorry, it was legit.
That opportunity helped.
And the next opportunity came alittle later when I met a
lieutenant in ranger school whohad told me that he was a prior
E4.
He was a second lieutenant andhe was like, hey, you know, I
(30:55):
just finished up commission andso of course we're growing up in
the 80s and the 90s.
You have be all you can be.
I took that literally.
So when I came in a uniform,when it was an opportunity
presented to me, they're like,hey, who wants to?
And I'm like I had to learn notto volunteer for certain things
(31:15):
because you're on details.
But I was like, yes, I willtake that.
And it kept opening up to thepoint where, like, hey, now you
get to go do this.
Now, this other opportunity wasprovided to me, like it is to
me.
It was like a dream come true.
For some people I understandthat, yes, I have a military
(31:38):
background, but I was willing totake the step if I would have
stayed out of uniform.
For some people, I understandthat, uh, yes, I have a military
background, but I was willingto take the step.
If I would have stayed out ofuniform for some reason, I would
have, I just think part of mynature would have, like you know
what that's an opportunity?
Uh, and part of the great thingis I didn't have to fill
anybody's shoes.
I think just you know somepeople who grew up with parents
who were really successful.
They're trying to figure outout how do I make somebody proud
(32:00):
of me?
And I was just trying to figureout how do I make something of
myself more than making somebodyproud of me, because then if I
fail, then I'm not lettinganybody down, but I'm learning
for myself.
And then how do I?
Speaker 1 (32:19):
get back up and try something different.
Yeah, that can be kind offreeing when you're realizing
like, hey, it's just me I got toworry about, so if I trip and
stumble, I can get back up andI'm not hurting anybody else.
No, that makes total sense.
Um, I want to also be talkingabout, you know now, tripping,
fallen or affecting otherpeople's lives, lives.
(32:39):
What's it like now that you'relike you're taking on this role
where you're mentoring otherpeople and you're doing beyond
the track, like you just talkedabout.
Oh, it was just me, but now,yeah, you're.
You're, you've stepped up,you've grown, you matured and
now you're carrying all theseother people and you're
(33:01):
continually wanting to, andwillingly, add other people to
your I don't want to say burden,but to your workload.
Speaker 2 (33:11):
I now I'm starting to look at life as more of a
community versus kind of anindividual event, and it's, I
would say, responsibility,because I don't have the right
words for it Like it's, it's myresponsibility to at least
(33:32):
provide someone some informationso they can navigate their life
with, uh, with grace andunderstanding, cause I I'm not
going to be like, hey, you'regoing to be able to skip to
level 10.
No, you can't get to that, thatpoint, uh, because that that
just doesn't happen.
(33:53):
You win a lottery and most ofthe people that broke, so you
can get the levels in, but youback down level one because you
didn't learn what you needed tolearn to be able to sustain the,
to have the character tosustain it.
So to your question I look atwhat are the things I've been
through?
How can I be of service?
(34:14):
So, when I talk about thatcommunity aspect, how can I be a
service to other people?
So, when I talk about thatcommunity aspect, how can I be a
service to other people?
And the best way I can be aservice?
Because you and I know, whenpeople look at you know like,
hey, this, these things that Ireceive, was was just a hey guy,
thank you.
Thank you for serving with us,but also a reminder.
Like you know what I have done,some things that people haven't
(34:35):
done and I put myself insituations.
Let me use that and hopefullythey can draw some correlations
with their story, whateverthey're going through, because
people have some challenges andthey don't know how to navigate
them because maybe they don'thave a mentor around.
So now, at this point in my life, how do I pass on as much as I
(34:56):
possibly pass on, so you know,like kind of cliche, so we can
build a better world?
Yeah, so the, the environmentthat my great great grandson is
going to be in is much betterthan the environment that I grew
up in.
Not the environment, becauseI'm not going to complain about
what I have now, that's just,that's pointless but the
environment that I grew up in.
(35:17):
There are some things that Iwish I could have changed, but
if we can, if I can help peopleand take it on as as an honor
and not as hey, like this thingis so heavy, yet it's heavy.
So I have to watch what I do.
I have to watch what I say andcommunicate.
I can't live wild Like I usedto.
I can't.
You, you know what.
(35:38):
You know what happens overthere just stays over there.
No, like I'm looking at myselfgeneration, generationally.
And can I do that for otherpeople?
And beyond a trek, this is whatwe're.
We're we are attempt is to dothat.
How can we help you lookgenerationally and look at
yourself at when you're 23?
Can you look at yourself forwhat do you do?
(35:58):
What are the investments whenyou're 23,?
Can you look at yourself 43?
What do you do?
What are the investments thatyou're doing at 23?
So now that I'm taking that on,we're taking it on as a company
.
I'm taking it on as as ahusband and a father.
I'm taking it on as a teacheras well.
How can I help you look atyourself in the future and
invest for DeAndre or Mac in thefuture, because they need to be
(36:21):
taken care of?
If I've looked, if I'm able tolook at it from that point, that
position, then it is likecomplete honor to do that and
then help people navigate thoseareas in their life, not remove
those things, because I thinkthat's that's kind of that
character development that youneed.
Like you need that, like youand I were at camp slap,
(36:44):
slap-a-thon and you know, all ofus say best school ever
attended, never want to go again.
Because when we got down to thecore of who we were, we found
like, was that a person hidingfrom the dude trying to put his
hands on?
Now it was.
Did I step from the dude tryingto put his hands on me?
Yeah, it was.
Did I step up when I needed to?
Yes, I did, but I didn't do itimmediately.
(37:07):
So I hesitate.
So I was being selfish.
How do I not be selfish?
Now Danny's calling me atfreaking 1130 at night and he
needs somebody to talk to him.
So let me pick up the phone andhave a conversation with him.
Or, if he left a message, letme get back with him.
And so, hey, what is it goingon?
(37:29):
Let me not give him unwantedadvice, but let me give him an
ear so that he knows he's heard,so that he doesn't take that
stress and freaking vomit it onsomeone else in any kind of
crazy way.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
That's so honorable and it's it's doing the next
kind thing.
To keep it simple in a lot ofways, you know, when you, when
you have somebody like thatcalls you or do whatever it is
that you can do to just helpsomeone, I mean that's the next
kind of thing that can changetheir day, change their life,
and it really is an honor.
You talked about honor and tochange people's lives, to shape
(38:08):
their lives, to share knowledgewith them so that you are
enabling them to beself-sufficient and be a better
person, have a better place intheir head and their mindset
stronger and they believe inthemselves and they understand
they are their greatest asset.
That's fantastic.
So I want to talk now a littlebit about adversity.
(38:29):
So say you're mentoring oryou're working with somebody and
they're stuck in that victimmentality and dealing with a lot
of adversity.
How would you coach someonelike that, or what's some
nuggets of information that youwould share to overcome that
victim mentality?
Speaker 2 (38:48):
So I laugh only because my wife had to teach me
that, um, that I had to developsome empathy.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
develops an empathy side and I'm like freaking I'm a
stiff guy empathy.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
so, uh, I, I'm trying , I will as a, as a in a
coaching position.
First, I want to meet themwhere they are, but not meet
them with the, with the intentof I'm leaving you where you are
but I'm calling you up higher.
And the way I do that is I'mgonna put myself in their shoes
and try to see things from theirperspective.
(39:22):
And then you know the powerfulquestioning so what is it?
Why is this difficult for me?
You know, take time to go toschool for my future, because I
feel like I'm leaving my kidsout.
I had a client that was coaching.
(39:42):
I said what is it you're nottaking how do we rephrase that
for an investing?
So when we're dealing withpeople with challenges, we're
helping them change theirvocabulary, change their
perspective of how they see that.
But the only way I can helpthem change their perspective is
(40:03):
I got to kind of sit at whatthey're looking at, and so what
you're coaching is like I can'tgive you the answers, but I can
ask you the question that leadsyou to the direction that you
need to go, because you seeyourself there.
You just see all the obstaclesin a way, to your instinct.
So let's change yourperspective of how you see
yourself there.
You just see all the obstaclesin a way to your end state.
So let's change yourperspective on how you see the
obstacles, because now theybecome those steps for you to
(40:27):
take and leap over or go aroundin the sense like hey, I don't
have to deal with this.
So when I'm coaching someonethrough, is really seeing it
from their perspective?
So when I'm coaching someonethrough, is really seeing it
from their perspective,identifying what their end state
is and taking what they saw asa challenge and making it more
of a step or a level up.
You know, like if you're videogaming, Mario Brothers, you
(40:55):
remember when he was small, whenhe got a mushroom is like the
strength that you need to takeyour finance.
Or to you know, like let's holdoff on what we're doing over
here with our finances so we canmake the step to pay off this
debt, so they can create freedomfor us in the future Not that
the future goal is so far offbut that show them how to reward
(41:16):
themselves in a processreaching their goal but that
show them how to rewardthemselves in a process reaching
their goal.
Speaker 1 (41:24):
Good advice, and I like how you change their
vocabulary, or said you helpthem change their vocabulary,
because I think that's veryempowering, because people will
say I can't, or I'm not smartenough, or I don't know how to,
or I have to do this instead ofI get to do this.
So I think that is a verypowerful tool that you just
(41:47):
addressed.
As far as changing someone'svocabulary, a good mentor, a
good coach will do that and bychanging your vocabulary you
will change the way you think.
So you're not stuck in thatrepeating pattern of the thought
process where you're beingnegative or I can't, I can't, I
can't, I don't know how, so thatI think that's a tool that you
(42:10):
bring to the table.
That's absolutely fantasticbecause once you start changing
your thoughts, your thoughts canchange your mindset, which can
change your habits, which canchange your life.
It's like this spiral orsnowball effect.
Yes, and.
I think I mean you've lived itright.
Like, do you agree with that?
Speaker 2 (42:30):
I mean it's absolutely because it's so.
I think part of my, myinability to be empathetic in
the past is because life gave mea shit sandwich and I'm like no
, no, no, no, eat it up.
You know like, but I had tolike clear it away.
I remember my mom.
She used to make us like cleanthe toilet, right, you had no
(42:52):
rubber, no rubber glove,freaking, it was disgusting.
And she said you wash your hand.
You know, it was disgusting andshe's like you wash your hand,
you know.
And then I found myself inkuwait squeegeeing, uh, poop, to
use a, a bathroom that somelocals had used or whatever.
And my first said here, macsqueegee the poop, and I'm like
but this is like like kuwaitipoop.
(43:12):
First, sir, he was like rogerthat, and he walked away.
You and I'm like squeegee andpoop.
And what clicked in my mind wasmom's like you can wash your
hand, I can wash my boots, youknow.
So, dealing with a student, onestudent, I asked them to do
something and she said I can't.
I said OK, I can't lift thishouse with my bare hands.
(43:33):
I can't do that.
It's either you don't want to.
Now they're like I don't wantto say I don't want to because
maybe that that task was simple,but if I admit that I don't
(43:55):
want to, then I'm not choosingto apply myself.
So when we talk about changinglanguage is I want you to see
that what you're doing isdigging your own grave.
You can stop digging Like Idon't understand why I'm still
down here.
It's like, well, um, you knowthere's a ladder over there,
because you digging is not goingto get you out unless you're,
(44:17):
you know, building some kind ofbrick off the side and it's like
, oh, I didn't know that.
And in some of it they don'tsee it because they're in kind
of a fishbowl, and it's like hey, I'm up in north of Raleigh.
I taught in Durham High Schoollast year for a year.
Durham Hillside High School isone of like one of the oldest
(44:41):
black high schools in thecountry.
If you're around there alreadythe triangle area Across the
street, if you will you gotdowntown Durham Duke University
up the street from the highschool was North Carolina
Central University.
It was North Carolina CentralUniversity.
Another way is NC State UNC andyou have students who've never
(45:05):
been outside of theirneighborhood and you got these
universities.
You got tech booning around,the kids are playing video games
and I said where's Epic Gamesat?
Where's the headquarters?
No, no, no, no, cary, cary,north Carolina Guys like you
have to be able to see this sothat you can see there is
something for you.
You're not just stuck here.
(45:25):
Uh, and I was able to see that.
Growing up in Cleveland, you gota huge city, but if you stay
inside your little neighborhood,me and my brother used to ride
our bikes around the entire.
The entire city was ourbackyard.
We snuck in movie theaters allacross Cleveland, even the
suburbs.
Um, I borrowed things thatdidn't belong to me.
(45:48):
Uh, we try to derail trains.
We freaking jumped in, uh, thelake, swimming in the lake.
So these different experiencesallow me to see something
different.
So I was like I got to get outof Cleveland.
When I got out of Cleveland, Iwas able to see like, oh, that's
just a city, that's just a city.
There's other cities, and sowhen you can help people see
(46:08):
that there is more forthemselves than what they see,
then you give them courage todream bigger and being able to
navigate.
And somebody did that for me.
Mr McManus was a chief of policeat night.
This guy, irish guy, when hesent me home with my FAFSA form
(46:29):
he highlighted here have yourmom fill in these areas, take it
to her.
She was like I'm not fillingout that because my mom just
didn't understand.
Mom, we, we so broke that atthe time the government going to
give me resources to go toschool, she's I ain't feeling
that out.
I came back, tears in my eyes.
Mr McMahon is like you either.
You got to join the military,but it wasn't a year until after
(46:50):
I graduated high school.
But for me, two weeks after Igraduated, I left my mom's house
.
I was I'm not, I'm not stayinghere, but because someone cared
enough to say hey, there'sanother way for it.
It took me a while to like goback to Mr McManus's words, but
when I saw that I was like man,the sky's the freaking limit.
That is absolutely yeah.
Speaker 1 (47:13):
Once you learn you can control your own destiny.
I think a lot of people, nomatter who they are, where you
grow up, if you're down and out,you think you can't control
your destiny, you think theworld's against you, you think
you're stuck.
You know, this is where I'm at,this is where I'm always going
to be, and that's not the truth.
(47:33):
And it takes somebody sometimesto open your eyes up, somebody
sometimes to open your eyes up.
And that's where we talk aboutsurrounding yourself with good
people or positive people inpositive environments, which is
super important.
You get yourself around thosepeople.
It will change your life andthere's studies on it.
You know, you probably allheard.
(47:55):
You know you are the average ofthe five people you associate
yourself with and those peopleare going to rub off on you
whether they're good or bad.
If you're hanging out withpeople who are just getting
drunk and chasing the ladies orchasing the guys and partying,
guess what?
That's probably all you'regoing to do.
If you're building a business,you're building dreams, you're
helping people, Well, you getwith those people.
(48:17):
They're going to help you do itmore, and I think that's what
is so great about beyond thetrack.
You guys are helping peoplebuild more from everything I've
seen it's.
It's fantastic.
So anybody out there listeningyou need to pause, go into our
description and find the linksand you can check out Beyond the
(48:38):
Trek and you can connect withMac or DeAndre McDonald.
We'd be more professional andplease give us a like, follow,
subscribe, check us out onYouTube, Instagram, Spotify, all
the places you can find apodcast, and you can always go
to theassetmindsetcom.
So before we wrap up, Andre, Iwant you to share one good
(49:01):
nugget, one thing.
We've covered a lot of topics,but if you could implant just
one mindset principle into everyhuman being's mind today, what
would be that principle and why?
Speaker 2 (49:17):
One thing that's coming to mind is failure is
only feedback, letting you knowyou're on the right path.
And the reason I say that, uh,I believe it was edison.
Someone interviewed edison andsaid, hey, the multiple times he
sort of failed at getting thelight bulb, he said, no, those.
(49:40):
That was feedback, letting meknow to this point, because no
one of none of us arecomplaining about lights at this
point in our life.
We're just not.
And so, uh, failure is feedback.
It allows you to readjust yourplan, be flexible, be flexible.
Um, it's not saying that you'renot disciplined because you
(50:01):
fail.
It's just saying that there'ssome things that you still have
to learn and things just need tobe.
You need to be ironed out, andit's okay.
Give yourself some grace, it isabsolutely okay.
Get back on the horse, keepriding and enjoy the process.
Speaker 1 (50:18):
Great advice, great knowledge to share, and I'm
going to add a little bit tothat fail first attempt in
learning.
So when you fail, you'relearning.
It's a good thing.
You can get something from it.
And please again give us afollow, like, subscribe, and
please share the Asset Mindsetpodcast with someone that you
know that could use a littleAsset Mindset in their life.
(50:41):
Thank you for listening.
See you next time and own yourpower.
well, mac, it's great to uh have you here.
Thank you for coming on, thankyou for sharing your time.
Time is valuable we all knowthat, and, uh, I did a little
research and boy I love whatyou're doing.
It goes right along with whatI'm trying to share with people,
and take our motto Deo PressurLiber, you know, to free the
oppressed, or free fromoppression, to the civilian
(00:30):
world where people oppressthemselves at their own way of
thinking.
And I'm trying to change thatwith the asset mindset, and I
see you making a lot of changeswith all the work you're doing.
And I'm just so honored to havethe co-founder of Beyond the
Trek on the Asset Mindset, soit's an honor to have you here.
Welcome to the show.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
It's absolutely an honor one to be invited to your
show, knowing that we've allbeen cut from some of the same
cloth.
What you bring to the tablethis time is I look at it as an
investment, not just for your,what you're doing and for those
who are going to tune into thepodcast and eventually hire you
(01:12):
for the great work that you'regoing to bring For me.
I'm just appreciative that youyou sent the invitation.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Oh well, well-deserved invitation.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
You're doing great things, so I want to start off,
tell us a little bit aboutBeyond the Track and what you're
doing and what you're teachingpeople through that discipline
(01:47):
approach when we are facinghardships, and navigating those
hardships, and taking thosestories one to not just
individuals but to organizations, on how they can overcome those
things and then build betterteams to run more efficiently,
so that they not are onlyaccountable for themselves but
they are also accountable forthose people that depend on them
and so they can be, you know,an outreach to not just their
(02:09):
organization but their communityat large.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
Love it.
So I'm going to get into somenitty gritty here.
What was the single hardestmoment in your life where you
realized that you needed to havea mindset to change the outcome
or the path that you were on?
Like you were ready to breakdown or something going wrong.
This crazy moment and theswitch finally clicked and
(02:34):
you're like you know what?
I need to have the rightmindset to get out of this or
get through this or whatever youneeded to do.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
All right.
So I'm going to try to give youa couple of different ones,
because I think one is it willnot capture all of it.
If you will, okay, let's see.
The first time we're at it it'slike, hey, you know what I have
to get out of this situation?
It was just before I joined theArmy.
(03:03):
I was working in a warehouse inSolon Ohio packing retaining
rings, and there was a.
There was a guy named Bob whodid independent wrestling at
night and I kept talking aboutyou know, I'm gonna join the
army, like people do, like I'mgonna join the army.
And Bob said he was like youkeep talking about it, you'll
never do it.
And once he said that he walkedaway and I had like a
(03:27):
premonition, if you will, andsaw myself as a 40-year-old man
packing boxes in a warehouse inSolon Ohio, right outside of
Cleburne.
That day I went to my boss andI said I need to get out of here
.
I need to get out of here.
So he let me go and I wentright to the recruiting station
and that was in March of 2001.
(03:50):
April 21st 2001,.
I was in basic training.
So that was like, hey, I don'twant this, this lifestyle,
because that was a year after Igraduated from high school and
so, if we fast forward throughmy army time, I had just got
back from my first deployment toKuwait.
(04:10):
I was a logistics guy and abuddy of mine said, hey, let's
go to selection.
And I said, ok, roger, you knowlike this is, I'll do it.
You know, like, just asmotivated as it as ever, I'm
going to do it.
So I get past that point.
I'm in language school and I'mhaving a difficult time through
French, and Dwayne Legg was amedic that was in going through
(04:32):
language school with me and Ihad this I don't care, cleveland
kid attitude because I wasstruggling and I kind of I found
that that was my safety.
If I said, I don't care, thepeople won't, they won't like
reach in a little bit more.
But Dwayne called me on mysafety.
If I sat on care, the peoplewon't, they won't uh, like reach
in a little bit more.
But Dwayne called me on my bull.
He did call me on my bullshit,and so, dwayne, what he did was
like, hey, mac, you know, duringlunch could you hang back?
(04:54):
And I said absolutely.
So Dwayne was a white dude fromColorado and uh, he said, hey,
man, man, you're a good dude butyou're fucking stupid.
Oh oh, okay, he said the factis, good people willing to help
you but you're not willing tosay when you need help and
you're struggling, versusgetting the help you need.
(05:16):
So he called me on it andthat's when I had to barrel down
and really focus on learningFrench so I can pass the Q
course and eventually go off tothird special forces group and,
um, the third story.
I mean it really changed mylife, that trajectory, because I
was able to complete that, likea lot of people who were not
(05:37):
able to complete some of thethings in training to be able to
be successful.
And it was in ranger school,freaking, that completed the Q
course.
About a year and a half later Ifound myself in Ranger School.
My team started at the time.
I had, I had volunteered, youknow, like most people, like hey
, man, I already did this, I'mnot going to, I'm going to do
Ranger School and I decided thisis what I wanted to do.
(05:57):
I'm in a mountain phase in.
It was January of 2007.
And at the end of January I'min in in Dahlonega, georgia, and
I'm freaking, falling up themountain and I was just pissed,
had a terrible attitude and Iremember this lieutenant.
He had walked up to me withthis like little daily bread.
(06:20):
You know, you get those littledaily breads and encouraging
words and I slipped the mountainand.
I smacked my face on the side ofthe mountain and I said I'm
going to take this stick andstick it in the freaking RI's
eye.
Now that's how pissed I was.
And then RI looked at me andwas like what'd you say, ranger?
I said no, I love RI's, youknow like they're the best
people ever.
(06:45):
So he walks away and I forgetthe lieutenant's name, but he
passed me off as Daily Bread andit was talking about
complaining and like, dude, ifyou're always freaking
complaining, when are you goingto really take responsibility
for your own actions?
And it was that time was like,hey, if I don't take
responsibility, I could likerecycle.
And if you recycle the storiesthat you hear and I was told by
my team sergeant in my company,commander, when I left to go to
Ranger School you fail, don'tcome back.
(07:07):
And I was like failure was notan option.
I was doing 61 days and thatwas it.
I was not recycling anybodyphase.
And so I got my stuff together.
I really like engage and sayyou know what?
I'm here for a purpose.
I volunteered to go one, but myteam started noticing.
He said, hey, but you're goingto like smooth out some of your
(07:27):
rough edges.
And it helped me smooth some ofmy rough edges.
I came from a non-combat armsbackground and so, yeah, going
through the Q course, being ingroup for a while, was great,
but I needed that extraexperience to show me some
things about my character that Icouldn't see.
You know, in the midst ofwearing your beret around, dudes
(07:50):
like, oh you know, when youwalk on post people like, oh,
this dude's like a walking God,and then you get to a place
where everybody's the same againYou're just a freaking arasa
number and you're not a God, anumber, and you're not a god.
You're a dude slipping up theside of the mountain who's
whining and complaining whileeverybody else is kind of
sucking it up and going throughthe same process you were going
(08:11):
through.
And, um, that was when I waslike, hey, you know what, can't
complain.
And I think the last story fastforward I had an opportunity to
go to naval post graduateschool and a comment that um,
first arnzenko said in selectionit's like don't let the monkey
get on your back.
And he's on your back and he'slike, he's like he's telling
(08:32):
you're lost and you believe himand you start walking around in
circles.
So I'm in naval postgraduateschool, my first couple of
classes.
They, hey, you have about ahundred pages to read at night
on these classes and I freakingscreamed in my office and in
Monterey like I have to do this.
And I was like if I don't dothis, I will fail.
(08:55):
It's like you got to stay uplate and so I had to really
figure it out Like, how do, howdo you read for a master's
degree to be able to do thatamount of classes in 18 months,
to be successful and back in tohave a grad degree?
And those are four uniquestories that I had to really
tell me like, hey, kick it inthe next year, you can do it.
(09:16):
You have everything in you.
You're not the only individualhere by yourself and one you
have that I had the GPA to getthere.
I you know, like the record, uh, my record spoke for itself so
I had to adapt to.
But that was another testinground for myself.
That really drove back to mychildhood, when I was in fifth
(09:37):
grade, and I realized that itwas an oxymoron that my fifth
grade teacher said when I got,like you're going to the sixth
grade and I laughed at her faceand she was like you'll never
amount to anything, and so itwasn't until I had my.
Your thesis is complete.
And I opened up my thesiscomplete, I was like, ah, you
said it negative, I'm not goingto amount to anything.
(09:57):
I have something that you knowlady probably did, or whatever,
but it allowed me to see that,hey, you're capable, you're
capable to go.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
So no, those are great stories and I think
there's a there's a lot there tochew on.
I mean, there's differentchapters of your life and the
different growth and I love thatyou're able to share all these
things here on the podcast soother people understand that.
All right, you just talkedabout you were a green beret,
(10:28):
you're long tab and you went toranger school when you were back
to a nobody and you were likeall complaining and whining,
like it doesn't matter who youare.
The struggle is real.
It's a constant battle in life.
Like you're a human being,you're alive.
You're going to have struggles.
Now how do you deal with them?
That's what really matters.
Like I say in my book, the assetmindset your, your mind is your
greatest weapon or your tool,or you are your greatest asset.
(10:51):
Can you elaborate more intothat?
Because I think everything youjust shared with the audience
was very powerful, that youended up becoming your greatest
asset by changing your mindset,and once you did that, that's
when you became successful.
So what helps or what shiftswere made that you can help give
(11:13):
the listeners an understandingof how that works and how it
worked in you?
Speaker 2 (11:19):
So great question one , I'm glad, great question One.
And when I think back when Iwas a E4 and just my buddy,
dominic Johnson, say, hey, let'sgo to selection, well, 92
alphas and COSCOM leg side ofthe post one were not jumping on
an aircraft.
And it was at that time it was2003 when we talked about that
(11:44):
decision after coming out of ourdeployment and I was like, can
I do this Right?
Because at that time, uh, therewas a, there was a, uh E5, my
unit who had, you know I'll getto that point but uh, to which
your question, she said herhusband was in seventh group and
they were running the range.
(12:06):
So my only uh like connectionwith SF guys at at the time I
didn't grow up reading booksabout sf dudes.
I didn't watch, you know, greenberet movies until I was after
I graduated the course.
So my exposure was those guyson the range and it was like a
one day on the range.
Oh, that's cool, they'recalling, calling Danny's,
calling Mac by his first name,and I was like that sounds cool.
(12:29):
But now it's like, hey, whatare you going to?
What do you have to do to getthere?
And one of the things on therewas like climbing a rope, like I
worked out, but I wasn't reallyclimbing a rope.
So how do I do that?
I started.
I started to identify likethese are tasks I have to
complete.
That I started.
I started to identify likethese are tasks I have to
complete.
How do I complete those tasks?
And so what I started to do islearn the skills that I didn't
(12:49):
already have.
I learned an op order, reallyshort, at a company commander at
the time, captain Flood, andshe.
She explained to me this iswhat an op order you know is and
this is how you break down anop order.
So for me, my mind, I had tosay, all right, for me to do
this, I have to learn this skill, versus say that I'm, I'm, I'm
(13:11):
able to, I'm unable to do itbecause I don't have the skill.
I say, well, I identify mydeficit and now allow me to to
make that an asset versus it isalways going to remain a deficit
for me, an asset versus it isalways going to remain a deficit
for me.
So that mind shit came a lotearly.
So I sat there when it came topatrolling, like I took a little
(13:32):
freaking those, those littlearmy men that stood still and I
briefed my op order to them,like that's, that's, that's what
I was doing to myself, in in,in helping me understand, like,
hey, if a team leader is goingto, this is how a team leader is
going to communicate.
If I'm telling a rifleman to godo this, this is what the
rifleman is going to do.
And so I had to put myself inthat environment, like in my
(13:54):
head and then on those littlemodels before I found myself in
that environment, like actuallydoing it, not only with our
soldiers but with foreignnationals around the world.
So it was really changing theway I thought and I think one of
the great things all of uswatched the news and a lot of us
(14:17):
saw like Black Lives Matter andnot throwing shade on anybody
on any side.
My mom never.
My mom didn't graduate fromhigh school, but she never
allowed me to say that Icouldn't.
Like I came from a drug dealingmom, a dad that sold drugs, did
drugs, and that wasn't reallyaround to where I had to figure
(14:40):
it out.
I had to develop a mindset thatsaid, hey, I have to do better
for me.
No one has a cape that's goingto save me at this time.
So I had to develop thoseskills.
So then I realized that I, thatI was my greatest asset, which
is really scary, right Too?
Speaker 1 (15:00):
Oh, that ownership yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Because then it's like it, it kind of it uh hinges
on your success when you takingthe time, and so I had to learn
over time how to take time andhow to be humble when I'm taking
that time, to learn a new skill, to be able to get to that goal
that I set for myself.
Speaker 1 (15:22):
That's fantastic, that's powerful stuff and I love
the like.
I need to figure out mydeficits, like how do I?
Instead of saying like, oh, Ican't do this, I can't.
Or when you shared storieswhere you were getting to the
point or close to I can't, youthen figured out all right, how
do I do this?
I need to change my attitude, Ineed to change my habits, I
(15:43):
need to change what I'm doing, Ineed to change my mindset so
that, right, there is gettingout of your comfort zone a
little bit and please share,because people need to
understand.
Getting out of your comfortzone is where growth really
happens.
You're not going to grow if youstay in your little safe circle
(16:04):
.
So let's talk about that.
Mac, oh man.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
It's like uh, can I have, like a house, a tattoo, uh
, tattoo, you know, all thisstuff to get out of comfort zone
, like I did, you know, like I'mdoing it, I'm still doing it,
which is such a weird thing, butI think it's kind of the
process of growth.
Um, if I it's not that I needsomething to feel alive, but I
(16:30):
think friction allows me to knowthat I'm still alive.
And if that, if that makessense, I need some of that
friction, some of that mentalgrowth.
I was on a um a call last night.
I finished up uh a mindfulleader course for mindfulness.
And and the lady asked and sowhat are you doing?
You know what's kind of nextfor you?
I said, based on what I, myexperience with mindfulness, I
(16:52):
like I have four books that I'mreading right now on meditation.
You know, like four books.
She was like, well, you knowpace yourself.
I, you know, I didn't tell herI'm pacing myself.
I'm reading kind of a chapter ata time from each book, cause
there's there's presentingdifferent perspectives, but I'm
trying to understand somethingthat I quite, you know, really
can't put words on for thisexperience, because I know, you
(17:17):
know, as far as mindset isconcerned, like it is helping me
grow.
So I need to put myself alittle uncomfortable, like I
need to read where people have.
This has been their path for 40or 50 years and I haven't been
along that path.
So now I'm going to put myselfin a situation where I'm a
little uncomfortable because Idon't, I just don't know what I
(17:38):
don't know, but now I need tolearn what I really don't know.
Um, so that's, that's one thingand uh, the the other is I'm
about to get ready to start backfor another master's degree in
school counseling.
I took a break for a whilebecause I thought about, like,
some different priorities.
But helping out another, ayoung man at school, cause I'm a
(18:01):
teacher in my next full-timecareer for right now, and I was
able to help him out.
But I said, how do I?
How I uh, basically help thembetter than being in a classroom
as a teacher, like being acounselor, to help.
You know, show them like, hey,man, life will present
challenges and I'm not going touse to say life is not easy.
(18:22):
Life just has challenges,because there's times that, like
we're at the beach Long as wehave no tsunami, life is pretty
easy.
You know so and I'm not goingto lie Like that's easy right
now.
Like we have electricity, lifeis pretty easy.
I'm not going out building afire for for light or or how I'm
going to cook food, so but howdo I help myself grow?
In a way I do that is, I putmyself in positions where it's
(18:44):
going to cause me to grow andworking full-time.
That's a lot, that's it's a loton my plate, but it's teaching
me.
How do I balance my time, youknow, and honoring that time.
So I hope that answered thequestion.
If it didn't, um, uh, because Iknow you're doing great, man.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
It is awesome.
You totally answered it becauseyou're sharing and explaining
how to make the changes.
You, you got to beuncomfortable and you're taking
on large tasks.
And those large tasks like hey,some people go into school
full-time.
That's overwhelming, you know.
But working a full-time job too, You're here on the podcast
(19:24):
with me making time.
I love and I mean when I say Ilove, I love the fact that
you're going to be a counselor,when I say I love, I love the
fact that you're going to be acounselor because you have a
great story and people needmentorship, because not
everybody has someone that canlead them down the path or show
them the path or point the pathto hey, have this growth or
(19:45):
positive mindset or what I deemthe asset mindset.
So can you share some mentorsor people that kind of lit the
way or showed you the way andhow that changed you, so maybe
our listeners can realize theimportance of mentors so, uh,
(20:07):
two of the ones that come cometo mind right now it's a kelly
ke Cole.
Speaker 2 (20:10):
He's a retired Lieutenant Colonel civil affairs
guy, and then Colonel Hayes,also retired mentor civil
affairs guy as well.
So when I was going to churchback in Fayetteville, kelly Cole
, white guy from middle ofAmerica, he just came up to me
one day because he knew I was ingroup and he was like hey, I
hear you're about to go to ROTC.
(20:32):
You know you should, you shouldconsider civil affairs.
And I was like Kelly, why?
He's like we ain't got nobrother, you know.
But I say OK.
So it was kind of like that,the interest, that conversation.
And every time I would see himon like a Wednesday for church
or Sunday, we would haveconversations.
And then I saw how he wastreating his wife.
I saw how he was treating hiswife.
You go to Kelly's house.
Kelly house was like you know,united Nations, there is
(20:55):
different.
There wasn't like, hey, I justtake care of my white kids.
Kelly was taking care of kidsthat didn't belong to him.
They were like, hey, these aremy boys right here.
And he really spent time as Ihit.
This is what a dad does.
This is like this is the areaswhere I felt that, not only that
, I can call kelly and ask himhey, kelly, I am about to you
(21:16):
know, like get ready to sign myoer, what are the things that I
need to consult?
He was like, oh okay, like,let's, let's look at what's
written here.
And so he was like not only waswritten, but how do you
communicate with um leadership?
So that was the thing thatkelly kind of instilled in me.
And and then Colonel Hayes, atthe time when he was my company
commander, when I was at Stewart, because we had a civil affairs
(21:38):
company that was separate fromour brigade at Stewart, and I
remember because I always liketo joke and that's just who I am
, so I joke with a commander orwhatever somebody in leadership.
And he had brought me in and hejust said hey, some people you
better be read their face.
And he brought me in and hejust said hey, you know some
(22:11):
people you doing about your,what do you where you want to go
next?
And he was like I just got, hehad just graduated from Naples
graduate school, so he wastelling me about his experience
on.
Hey, this is what success lookslike when you're in leadership
and what you need to do to beable to get to that goal,
because this team time will runout.
To be able to get to that goal,because this team time will run
(22:32):
out, what do you do next?
You know what does that looklike.
And being able to get on thephone before he before I ended
up in this company as mycommander I can like hey, these
are the things that I, that I'mupset about, that I see, and he
would, even though he's in thesame unit, he would separate
himself If you were outside theunit and have a conversation
(23:00):
with me like a man, excuse me,man to man, but officer to
officer.
Uh, when I had trouble um, someof us you know they're because
of the career you sacrifice onemarriage, uh, because of career,
that.
And then that happened.
But he sat prior to things likecompletely falling apart, was,
hey, let's, let's walk through.
Let me show you some of theareas that I went wrong and how
me and my wife were able to comeback from that.
And he took his time to do that.
So it wasn't like, hey, I'mjust going to mentor you for
(23:22):
your military career, like I'mgoing to help mentor you through
life.
And Kelly did the same thingwhen I was driving back from
California in the midst, beforeI knew my, my, my marriage was
over.
I had no clue at the time uh,my first marriage.
But I stayed in his, his house,with my family and he was
always like tables open, what'sgoing on at home?
(23:45):
You know, what are you guysgoing through?
Before I knew it, I'm like, hey, things look good.
You know, ex-wife was likeclosed off, but he were trying
to to mentor you past just acareer, but in life in general.
When I thought about getting outas a young captain, I called
Kelly.
He was like do you have sixmonths saved?
I said no.
(24:07):
He said the dumbest thing I'veever.
You have a wife and three kidsand you're going to get out and
you're going to leave an arm.
And I was like well, it lookslike we're going back to the
drawing board and work on ourplan.
So I say that because mentorshipis extremely important.
They're not going to allow youto just make a rash decision
(24:31):
without taking some time andthinking through your plan.
Mentors are going to say, heylook, this is what I did, but
I'm not giving you this as myprescription, I'm just showing
you how I had to navigatethrough challenges, and then
they're also challenging.
If you're trying to go X, thenyou need to do these things,
because if you're not doingthese things, as a mentor, I
(24:55):
can't, you know, provide youguidance if you're not willing
to listen for your success.
Because you know like and I'mputting in that position now for
my the three youngest, becausemy wife and I, now that are
married it is a blended family,and so what?
The thing that we're dealingwith right now is I'm telling my
(25:16):
kids like I am coming to becomemore of a God.
You're becoming a teenager.
Yes, I'm your parent, but I'mmore of your God.
I am not going to be like.
This is what you would do,because it's providing that
mentorship, and I think it'sextremely important, especially
when we're dealing with a newgeneration of young men and
women coming up.
(25:36):
If we don't find a way toinitiate them and I think
mentors do that they, if theycan't put you through hardship,
they'll point you in a directiontoward hardship For your
initiation rights, and that'swhat mentors are able to do
absolutely, and one of thethings I want people listeners
(25:58):
to hear is that if you noticewhen max talking is, the mentors
made time.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
When you find someone in your life that's a mentor,
they will make time, they willtake the time and you're worth
their time.
So also don't waste their time.
If someone's mentoring you,respect their, their time,
respect what they're doing,because they're giving you a
gift.
I mean it can change your life.
One mentor, one right personand I'm sure you know your
(26:29):
mentors change your life.
You're a different officer thanyou would have been because of
your mentors and you probablydid a much better job.
You learn from other people'smistakes, so you didn't make
your own.
I mean, we're all going to makeour own anyways, but you can
avoid the pitfalls from thementor teaching you Be like hey,
this was really bad, I'vescrewed this up, don't do this.
(26:52):
So please realize that you havementors out there available to
you and if you don't, you can gofind them.
They're out there becausementors are doers.
They're out there doingsomething, looking for somebody
that is doing what you want todo or reaching goals or levels
that you want to reach, and talkto them, see where it goes,
(27:13):
because they can change yourlife.
One person can just absolutelyopen the door for you.
One decision, one opportunitythat you take advantage of.
I want to now ask was there anopportunity?
I know you talked about joiningthe military.
You know you had that guy, theold guy, like oh, it forever
changed your trajectory and youare so grateful you did it.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
Because if you didn't do is when I went to the
recruiting station.
I went to the national guardrecruiting station and so, uh,
that opera.
So going through basic training, it was my dream.
I did not know that until I wasin ranger school when I had a
flashback to when we're livingin the projects and I was inside
a washing machine like it wasmy tank.
(28:25):
So me and my brother would likehe would try to work on pipes,
I would be in a washing machinelike this is my tank and love it
.
So when I went through basic I'mhaving a blast and I realized,
hey, basic is about to come to aclose and you're going to ait.
And then you got to go back tocleveland and I was like I'm
(28:48):
having too much fun for this.
And so, uh, the drill sergeantI forget which one told me at
ait.
He said, hey, look man, uh, ifyou, you let them know that you
have to take care of your family, they probably let you out that
contract and you can probablyend up joining the afternoon.
So I, you know, said I had youknow it's times in the past I've
(29:10):
sent my mom money.
So, technically, did I takecare of my family?
Absolutely, but it it opened meup.
Getting a brag was like an eyeopener because I was around
people at least some people whowanted to be where they wanted
to be.
Then other people like tryingto find something different.
(29:31):
And I mentioned I mentionedDominic earlier.
Dominic and I went to on Hunternot Hunter freaking Simmons
army airfield at the time.
And we were talking to freakingpilots because we were trying to
figure the next thing out Like,hey, what's what else we want
to do?
Prior to going to selection.
We talked to pilots and they'relike hey, you know, flying air,
(29:54):
you know helicopters is great,but you know I can blow up
without you knowing it.
And we're like not, that,that's not what we want to do,
don't want to die, you know, inin a ball of flames.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
Let's figure something else out.
Yeah, and there's no ieds.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
You'd never drive around in the infantry and just
blow up in a ball of flames.
No, that is true, but you don'tput that together until you
find yourself on that.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
You didn't know, I know I just it's just funny
thing because that was always mygreatest fear.
When you hit that, you just hitsomething in my head.
Like you know I I didn't mindlike getting a firefight, get
shot.
Just don't fucking blow me up,like I want a chance, like I
don't get an option.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
Yeah, sorry, it was legit.
That opportunity helped.
And the next opportunity came alittle later when I met a
lieutenant in ranger school whohad told me that he was a prior
E4.
He was a second lieutenant andhe was like, hey, you know, I
(30:55):
just finished up commission andso of course we're growing up in
the 80s and the 90s.
You have be all you can be.
I took that literally.
So when I came in a uniform,when it was an opportunity
presented to me, they're like,hey, who wants to?
And I'm like I had to learn notto volunteer for certain things
(31:15):
because you're on details.
But I was like, yes, I willtake that.
And it kept opening up to thepoint where, like, hey, now you
get to go do this.
Now, this other opportunity wasprovided to me, like it is to
me.
It was like a dream come true.
For some people I understandthat, yes, I have a military
(31:38):
background, but I was willing totake the step if I would have
stayed out of uniform.
For some people, I understandthat, uh, yes, I have a military
background, but I was willingto take the step.
If I would have stayed out ofuniform for some reason, I would
have, I just think part of mynature would have, like you know
what that's an opportunity?
Uh, and part of the great thingis I didn't have to fill
anybody's shoes.
I think just you know somepeople who grew up with parents
who were really successful.
They're trying to figure outout how do I make somebody proud
(32:00):
of me?
And I was just trying to figureout how do I make something of
myself more than making somebodyproud of me, because then if I
fail, then I'm not lettinganybody down, but I'm learning
for myself.
And then how do I?
Speaker 1 (32:19):
get back up and try something different.
Yeah, that can be kind offreeing when you're realizing
like, hey, it's just me I got toworry about, so if I trip and
stumble, I can get back up andI'm not hurting anybody else.
No, that makes total sense.
Um, I want to also be talkingabout, you know now, tripping,
fallen or affecting otherpeople's lives, lives.
(32:39):
What's it like now that you'relike you're taking on this role
where you're mentoring otherpeople and you're doing beyond
the track, like you just talkedabout.
Oh, it was just me, but now,yeah, you're.
You're, you've stepped up,you've grown, you matured and
now you're carrying all theseother people and you're
(33:01):
continually wanting to, andwillingly, add other people to
your I don't want to say burden,but to your workload.
Speaker 2 (33:11):
I now I'm starting to look at life as more of a
community versus kind of anindividual event, and it's, I
would say, responsibility,because I don't have the right
words for it Like it's, it's myresponsibility to at least
(33:32):
provide someone some informationso they can navigate their life
with, uh, with grace andunderstanding, cause I I'm not
going to be like, hey, you'regoing to be able to skip to
level 10.
No, you can't get to that, thatpoint, uh, because that that
just doesn't happen.
(33:53):
You win a lottery and most ofthe people that broke, so you
can get the levels in, but youback down level one because you
didn't learn what you needed tolearn to be able to sustain the,
to have the character tosustain it.
So to your question I look atwhat are the things I've been
through?
How can I be of service?
(34:14):
So, when I talk about thatcommunity aspect, how can I be a
service to other people?
So, when I talk about thatcommunity aspect, how can I be a
service to other people?
And the best way I can be aservice?
Because you and I know, whenpeople look at you know like,
hey, this, these things that Ireceive, was was just a hey guy,
thank you.
Thank you for serving with us,but also a reminder.
Like you know what I have done,some things that people haven't
(34:35):
done and I put myself insituations.
Let me use that and hopefullythey can draw some correlations
with their story, whateverthey're going through, because
people have some challenges andthey don't know how to navigate
them because maybe they don'thave a mentor around.
So now, at this point in my life, how do I pass on as much as I
(34:56):
possibly pass on, so you know,like kind of cliche, so we can
build a better world?
Yeah, so the, the environmentthat my great great grandson is
going to be in is much betterthan the environment that I grew
up in.
Not the environment, becauseI'm not going to complain about
what I have now, that's just,that's pointless but the
environment that I grew up in.
(35:17):
There are some things that Iwish I could have changed, but
if we can, if I can help peopleand take it on as as an honor
and not as hey, like this thingis so heavy, yet it's heavy.
So I have to watch what I do.
I have to watch what I say andcommunicate.
I can't live wild Like I usedto.
I can't.
You, you know what.
(35:38):
You know what happens overthere just stays over there.
No, like I'm looking at myselfgeneration, generationally.
And can I do that for otherpeople?
And beyond a trek, this is whatwe're.
We're we are attempt is to dothat.
How can we help you lookgenerationally and look at
yourself at when you're 23?
Can you look at yourself forwhat do you do?
(35:58):
What are the investments whenyou're 23,?
Can you look at yourself 43?
What do you do?
What are the investments thatyou're doing at 23?
So now that I'm taking that on,we're taking it on as a company
.
I'm taking it on as as ahusband and a father.
I'm taking it on as a teacheras well.
How can I help you look atyourself in the future and
invest for DeAndre or Mac in thefuture, because they need to be
(36:21):
taken care of?
If I've looked, if I'm able tolook at it from that point, that
position, then it is likecomplete honor to do that and
then help people navigate thoseareas in their life, not remove
those things, because I thinkthat's that's kind of that
character development that youneed.
Like you need that, like youand I were at camp slap,
(36:44):
slap-a-thon and you know, all ofus say best school ever
attended, never want to go again.
Because when we got down to thecore of who we were, we found
like, was that a person hidingfrom the dude trying to put his
hands on?
Now it was.
Did I step from the dude tryingto put his hands on me?
Yeah, it was.
Did I step up when I needed to?
Yes, I did, but I didn't do itimmediately.
(37:07):
So I hesitate.
So I was being selfish.
How do I not be selfish?
Now Danny's calling me atfreaking 1130 at night and he
needs somebody to talk to him.
So let me pick up the phone andhave a conversation with him.
Or, if he left a message, letme get back with him.
And so, hey, what is it goingon?
(37:29):
Let me not give him unwantedadvice, but let me give him an
ear so that he knows he's heard,so that he doesn't take that
stress and freaking vomit it onsomeone else in any kind of
crazy way.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
That's so honorable and it's it's doing the next
kind thing.
To keep it simple in a lot ofways, you know, when you, when
you have somebody like thatcalls you or do whatever it is
that you can do to just helpsomeone, I mean that's the next
kind of thing that can changetheir day, change their life,
and it really is an honor.
You talked about honor and tochange people's lives, to shape
(38:08):
their lives, to share knowledgewith them so that you are
enabling them to beself-sufficient and be a better
person, have a better place intheir head and their mindset
stronger and they believe inthemselves and they understand
they are their greatest asset.
That's fantastic.
So I want to talk now a littlebit about adversity.
(38:29):
So say you're mentoring oryou're working with somebody and
they're stuck in that victimmentality and dealing with a lot
of adversity.
How would you coach someonelike that, or what's some
nuggets of information that youwould share to overcome that
victim mentality?
Speaker 2 (38:48):
So I laugh only because my wife had to teach me
that, um, that I had to developsome empathy.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
develops an empathy side and I'm like freaking I'm a
stiff guy empathy.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
so, uh, I, I'm trying , I will as a, as a in a
coaching position.
First, I want to meet themwhere they are, but not meet
them with the, with the intentof I'm leaving you where you are
but I'm calling you up higher.
And the way I do that is I'mgonna put myself in their shoes
and try to see things from theirperspective.
(39:22):
And then you know the powerfulquestioning so what is it?
Why is this difficult for me?
You know, take time to go toschool for my future, because I
feel like I'm leaving my kidsout.
I had a client that was coaching.
(39:42):
I said what is it you're nottaking how do we rephrase that
for an investing?
So when we're dealing withpeople with challenges, we're
helping them change theirvocabulary, change their
perspective of how they see that.
But the only way I can helpthem change their perspective is
(40:03):
I got to kind of sit at whatthey're looking at, and so what
you're coaching is like I can'tgive you the answers, but I can
ask you the question that leadsyou to the direction that you
need to go, because you seeyourself there.
You just see all the obstaclesin a way, to your instinct.
So let's change yourperspective of how you see
yourself there.
You just see all the obstaclesin a way to your end state.
So let's change yourperspective on how you see the
obstacles, because now theybecome those steps for you to
(40:27):
take and leap over or go aroundin the sense like hey, I don't
have to deal with this.
So when I'm coaching someonethrough, is really seeing it
from their perspective?
So when I'm coaching someonethrough, is really seeing it
from their perspective,identifying what their end state
is and taking what they saw asa challenge and making it more
of a step or a level up.
You know, like if you're videogaming, Mario Brothers, you
(40:55):
remember when he was small, whenhe got a mushroom is like the
strength that you need to takeyour finance.
Or to you know, like let's holdoff on what we're doing over
here with our finances so we canmake the step to pay off this
debt, so they can create freedomfor us in the future Not that
the future goal is so far offbut that show them how to reward
(41:16):
themselves in a processreaching their goal but that
show them how to rewardthemselves in a process reaching
their goal.
Speaker 1 (41:24):
Good advice, and I like how you change their
vocabulary, or said you helpthem change their vocabulary,
because I think that's veryempowering, because people will
say I can't, or I'm not smartenough, or I don't know how to,
or I have to do this instead ofI get to do this.
So I think that is a verypowerful tool that you just
(41:47):
addressed.
As far as changing someone'svocabulary, a good mentor, a
good coach will do that and bychanging your vocabulary you
will change the way you think.
So you're not stuck in thatrepeating pattern of the thought
process where you're beingnegative or I can't, I can't, I
can't, I don't know how, so thatI think that's a tool that you
(42:10):
bring to the table.
That's absolutely fantasticbecause once you start changing
your thoughts, your thoughts canchange your mindset, which can
change your habits, which canchange your life.
It's like this spiral orsnowball effect.
Yes, and.
I think I mean you've lived itright.
Like, do you agree with that?
Speaker 2 (42:30):
I mean it's absolutely because it's so.
I think part of my, myinability to be empathetic in
the past is because life gave mea shit sandwich and I'm like no
, no, no, no, eat it up.
You know like, but I had tolike clear it away.
I remember my mom.
She used to make us like cleanthe toilet, right, you had no
(42:52):
rubber, no rubber glove,freaking, it was disgusting.
And she said you wash your hand.
You know, it was disgusting andshe's like you wash your hand,
you know.
And then I found myself inkuwait squeegeeing, uh, poop, to
use a, a bathroom that somelocals had used or whatever.
And my first said here, macsqueegee the poop, and I'm like
but this is like like kuwaitipoop.
(43:12):
First, sir, he was like rogerthat, and he walked away.
You and I'm like squeegee andpoop.
And what clicked in my mind wasmom's like you can wash your
hand, I can wash my boots, youknow.
So, dealing with a student, onestudent, I asked them to do
something and she said I can't.
I said OK, I can't lift thishouse with my bare hands.
(43:33):
I can't do that.
It's either you don't want to.
Now they're like I don't wantto say I don't want to because
maybe that that task was simple,but if I admit that I don't
(43:55):
want to, then I'm not choosingto apply myself.
So when we talk about changinglanguage is I want you to see
that what you're doing isdigging your own grave.
You can stop digging Like Idon't understand why I'm still
down here.
It's like, well, um, you knowthere's a ladder over there,
because you digging is not goingto get you out unless you're,
(44:17):
you know, building some kind ofbrick off the side and it's like
, oh, I didn't know that.
And in some of it they don'tsee it because they're in kind
of a fishbowl, and it's like hey, I'm up in north of Raleigh.
I taught in Durham High Schoollast year for a year.
Durham Hillside High School isone of like one of the oldest
(44:41):
black high schools in thecountry.
If you're around there alreadythe triangle area Across the
street, if you will you gotdowntown Durham Duke University
up the street from the highschool was North Carolina
Central University.
It was North Carolina CentralUniversity.
Another way is NC State UNC andyou have students who've never
(45:05):
been outside of theirneighborhood and you got these
universities.
You got tech booning around,the kids are playing video games
and I said where's Epic Gamesat?
Where's the headquarters?
No, no, no, no, cary, cary,north Carolina Guys like you
have to be able to see this sothat you can see there is
something for you.
You're not just stuck here.
(45:25):
Uh, and I was able to see that.
Growing up in Cleveland, you gota huge city, but if you stay
inside your little neighborhood,me and my brother used to ride
our bikes around the entire.
The entire city was ourbackyard.
We snuck in movie theaters allacross Cleveland, even the
suburbs.
Um, I borrowed things thatdidn't belong to me.
(45:48):
Uh, we try to derail trains.
We freaking jumped in, uh, thelake, swimming in the lake.
So these different experiencesallow me to see something
different.
So I was like I got to get outof Cleveland.
When I got out of Cleveland, Iwas able to see like, oh, that's
just a city, that's just a city.
There's other cities, and sowhen you can help people see
(46:08):
that there is more forthemselves than what they see,
then you give them courage todream bigger and being able to
navigate.
And somebody did that for me.
Mr McManus was a chief of policeat night.
This guy, irish guy, when hesent me home with my FAFSA form
(46:29):
he highlighted here have yourmom fill in these areas, take it
to her.
She was like I'm not fillingout that because my mom just
didn't understand.
Mom, we, we so broke that atthe time the government going to
give me resources to go toschool, she's I ain't feeling
that out.
I came back, tears in my eyes.
Mr McMahon is like you either.
You got to join the military,but it wasn't a year until after
(46:50):
I graduated high school.
But for me, two weeks after Igraduated, I left my mom's house
.
I was I'm not, I'm not stayinghere, but because someone cared
enough to say hey, there'sanother way for it.
It took me a while to like goback to Mr McManus's words, but
when I saw that I was like man,the sky's the freaking limit.
That is absolutely yeah.
Speaker 1 (47:13):
Once you learn you can control your own destiny.
I think a lot of people, nomatter who they are, where you
grow up, if you're down and out,you think you can't control
your destiny, you think theworld's against you, you think
you're stuck.
You know, this is where I'm at,this is where I'm always going
to be, and that's not the truth.
(47:33):
And it takes somebody sometimesto open your eyes up, somebody
sometimes to open your eyes up.
And that's where we talk aboutsurrounding yourself with good
people or positive people inpositive environments, which is
super important.
You get yourself around thosepeople.
It will change your life andthere's studies on it.
You know, you probably allheard.
(47:55):
You know you are the average ofthe five people you associate
yourself with and those peopleare going to rub off on you
whether they're good or bad.
If you're hanging out withpeople who are just getting
drunk and chasing the ladies orchasing the guys and partying,
guess what?
That's probably all you'regoing to do.
If you're building a business,you're building dreams, you're
helping people, Well, you getwith those people.
(48:17):
They're going to help you do itmore, and I think that's what
is so great about beyond thetrack.
You guys are helping peoplebuild more from everything I've
seen it's.
It's fantastic.
So anybody out there listeningyou need to pause, go into our
description and find the linksand you can check out Beyond the
(48:38):
Trek and you can connect withMac or DeAndre McDonald.
We'd be more professional andplease give us a like, follow,
subscribe, check us out onYouTube, Instagram, Spotify, all
the places you can find apodcast, and you can always go
to theassetmindsetcom.
So before we wrap up, Andre, Iwant you to share one good
(49:01):
nugget, one thing.
We've covered a lot of topics,but if you could implant just
one mindset principle into everyhuman being's mind today, what
would be that principle and why?
Speaker 2 (49:17):
One thing that's coming to mind is failure is
only feedback, letting you knowyou're on the right path.
And the reason I say that, uh,I believe it was edison.
Someone interviewed edison andsaid, hey, the multiple times he
sort of failed at getting thelight bulb, he said, no, those.
(49:40):
That was feedback, letting meknow to this point, because no
one of none of us arecomplaining about lights at this
point in our life.
We're just not.
And so, uh, failure is feedback.
It allows you to readjust yourplan, be flexible, be flexible.
Um, it's not saying that you'renot disciplined because you
(50:01):
fail.
It's just saying that there'ssome things that you still have
to learn and things just need tobe.
You need to be ironed out, andit's okay.
Give yourself some grace, it isabsolutely okay.
Get back on the horse, keepriding and enjoy the process.
Speaker 1 (50:18):
Great advice, great knowledge to share, and I'm
going to add a little bit tothat fail first attempt in
learning.
So when you fail, you'relearning.
It's a good thing.
You can get something from it.
And please again give us afollow, like, subscribe, and
please share the Asset Mindsetpodcast with someone that you
know that could use a littleAsset Mindset in their life.
(50:41):
Thank you for listening.
See you next time and own yourpower.
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