What Siblings of Autistic Kids Wish You Knew (S8E20)

When you’re parenting autistic children or kids with high support needs, it’s easy to wonder how it all impacts their siblings. Do they feel forgotten? Overwhelmed? Lost in the shuffle? In this heartfelt episode of The Autism Dad Podcast, I sit down with autism mom Amy Kelly and her adult son Danny for a raw, emotional, and hopeful look at the sibling experience—and why it matters more than we often realize. Amy is a powerhouse in the autism community. She’s the National Director of Family Engagement at Devereux and a longtime advocate for autism support for families. But this episode isn’t about professional titles—it’s about her lived experience as a mom raising profoundly autistic Annie, while trying to meet the needs of her neurotypical sons, including today’s guest, Danny. Danny brings a sibling’s perspective that every parent needs to hear. He opens up about what it was like growing up with a sister who needed constant care, the unspoken pressures siblings carry, and how he’s now leading a national effort to support siblings like him. Whether you’re parenting autistic children or raising neurodivergent kids of any kind, this episode offers valuable insight, encouragement, and a reminder that every child in your home deserves to feel seen. What You’ll Learn in This Episode: What it’s really like growing up with a sibling who has autism or profound disabilities Why siblings may feel isolated, unseen, or forgotten—even in loving homes How parents can better balance attention between neurodivergent and neurotypical kids The lifelong bond between siblings, and how it evolves into adulthood Danny’s work creating resources and community through Devereux’s sibling initiative Practical ways siblings can stay connected and prepare for future caregiving roles How autism reshaped (not ruined) their family in powerful ways Why redefining success and independence is key for autistic individuals Subscribe, Support, and Connect: If you found this episode helpful, please consider subscribing to The Autism Dad Podcast on your favorite platform and leave a review to help more families find this content. You can visit theautismdad.com for articles, resources, and updates—or if you’re interested in sponsoring an episode, get in touch. This episode is sponsored by: Mama Bird – Brain-focused kids’ multivitamins designed by a neurologist mom. Get 20% off your first order at lovemamabird.com/theautismdad. Mightier – Help your child build emotional regulation skills through biofeedback video games. Learn more at mightier.com and use the code "theautismdad22" to save 10%. About Rob Gorski (Host): Rob Gorski is a single dad to three autistic sons and the creator of The Autism Dad blog and podcast. He shares real-life stories, insights, and support for parents raising neurodivergent kids. Rob’s work has been featured by CNN, ABC, BBC, and The Tamron Hall Show. Contact: [e-mail] About Amy Kelly: Amy Kelly, MBA, MNM, is the National Director of Family Engagement at Devereux Advanced Behavioral Health and mom to three kids, including her daughter Annie, who has profound autism. Amy is a national advocate for disability support, working with organizations like the Autism Care Network and the American Academy of Pediatrics. Contact: [e-mail] About Danny Kelly: Danny Kelly is the older brother of Annie, who has profound autism. He co-chairs Devereux’s Sibling Engagement Committee and serves on the National Family Advisory Board. Danny uses his lived experience to advocate for siblings and inclusive support across the disability community.