OPERATION OVERLOAD / 4.17 Hackidu

In an episode inspired by Season 4, Episode 17 of Everybody Loves Raymond, “Hackidu,” Mike makes a bad trade outside of the sperm bank.

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Episode Transcript

Adam (00:00):
Good morning, students and faculty of Lynbrook University.
As you know, each week you'rerequired to watch an episode
of Everybody Loves Raymond.
This week's episode is seasonfour, episode 17, Hackidu.
Ray tries to learn aboutAllie's favorite card game.
We recommend watching the showas soon as possible to prepare
for what you are about to hear.

(00:21):
Also, congratulations to the humandog sledding team for coming in
third at the Iditarod last week.
I know it's very, very clearlya kink thing with you guys, so
I apologize in advance to thecustodial staff for saying this, but
fellas, You truly are our good boys.

Mike (00:57):
Excuse me, is this the, uh, Henderson's Sperm Factory?

Adam (01:02):
Are you asking to speak with Mr. Henderson?
Mr. Henderson is not available right now.

Mike (01:07):
Uh, oh, um, he's not, who, is there any higher up that I can speak to?
It's kind of important.
What

Adam (01:12):
is your issue, sir? Mr. Henderson is currently at his dental practice.
He splits his time.

Mike (01:18):
The combination sperm bank and It's so

Adam (01:21):
embarrassing that you don't know Michael Henderson, DDS, one of
Lynbrook's most influential residents.

Mike (01:29):
I just, I'm sorry, I just saw the billboard that said you squeeze it, we
freeze it, and I decided to stop on by.
Is

Adam (01:34):
that what you're interested in doing?
Squeezing it?

Mike (01:37):
Okay, I'm more interested in, in how does one purchase the frozen?

Adam (01:42):
You'd like to

Mike (01:45):
Yeah, I mean, I don't have an account open, so I
don't know how that works.
Okay, well, you're gonna need to

Adam (01:49):
fill out this paperwork.
Okay, so.
Oh, okay.
There are a couple of formsyou need to be aware of.
Um, this is a conflictof interest disclosure.
If you have any assetsheld in the sperm bank.
You need to waive all liability in casewe accidentally give you your own sperm,
because we have no way of knowing.

Mike (02:08):
Okay, no, I, I understand.
No, I, that, that's, thatwon't be a problem here.
Do I, is there like aminimum, uh, uh, amount?
Like is there a A minimum deposit to open

Adam (02:19):
the account?
Yes.
Yeah.

Mike (02:20):
Yes.
Yeah.
Okay, even if I'm just withdrawing, Igotta, I gotta give some Cause I don't
wanna be hit with, uh, with I don't wannaget hit with insufficient funds, so The

Adam (02:30):
overdraft fee is pretty severe, I'll tell you that much.

Mike (02:34):
Oh, okay.
What's your name, ma'am?

Adam (02:36):
My name is Sylvia.

Mike (02:37):
Well, thank you, Sylvia.
I I appreciate your your help here.
I just You know, I'm, this is myfirst time making the withdrawal,
it's kind of a big deal for me, so.

Adam (02:46):
Your wife is a very lucky woman.
We only have the finest qualityspecimens here at Henderson Sperm Bank.
I think it's so great that you'redoing the home insemination.
We do sell basters over there on the rack.
I, I'm not, no, hold on.
It goes from mini to jumbo.

(03:06):
And we find that our clientshave the best results with Jumbo.
But, obviously, you need to makea bigger withdrawal for that.

Mike (03:14):
Okay, I see, oh, I see four sizes.
Mini.
Small.
Yeah.

Adam (03:20):
Regular.
That

Mike (03:21):
mini is already huge.
I just, I just gotta say, that'sat least, that mini is, is larger
than any, that's not the point.
I'm not married, I'm not doingthis for a significant other.
Well, sir,

Adam (03:33):
if you're not married, we can't possibly let you inseminate someone.
This is a catholic Well, I'm

Mike (03:39):
not inse

Adam (03:40):
Sperm bank.

Mike (03:41):
Is like, the Catholics have sperm banks?

Adam (03:44):
Michael Henderson does.
Michael Henderson is a Catholic?
Michael Henderson is a Catholic, yes.
He is?
And he's very, yes.

Mike (03:53):
Why are you

Adam (03:53):
shocked at that?
So

Mike (03:54):
I see behind you

Adam (03:56):
Crucifix!
Yeah, no, I

Mike (03:57):
see the, I thought that was a personal thing.
I thought maybe, I don't know.
But no, I see behind youthe three images of him.
At, in his dentist supply.
The triptych?
Yes.

Adam (04:07):
The triptych of Michael Henderson that we have?
The gold leaf triptych?
Yes.
Byzantine style?
I see him.
Inverse perspective?
Yes.
Yeah, I

Mike (04:14):
see him with someone mouth open in, in, in his dentist uniform.
And he's holding jumbo.
And he's holding jumbo.
But he's wearing the priest collar.
But I kind of assumed that thatwas, you know, I thought that
was like Halloween or something.
I didn't realize that thatwas the third profession.

Adam (04:34):
No.
Okay.
He is not an active member of theclergy, but he does hold a Doctor
of Divinity from the seminary.
Oh!
And I do mean, the se the seminary.
So why, sir, I never got yourname by the way, can you just put

(05:00):
your name there on the, um, Yeah,

Mike (05:01):
I'm Mike, I think I'm up to I have to change now?
No, I'm up to K now.
I'm K. I'm Mike K. It's nice to

Adam (05:08):
What does K stand for?
Do you remember?
Kevorkian.
That's right.

Mike (05:13):
Um

Adam (05:13):
I mean, I don't know

Mike (05:14):
that.
Yeah, no, of course.
Um

Adam (05:16):
Mike Kevorkian.
Yeah.
Got it.

Mike (05:17):
I just, listen, I, um So, this is kind of embarrassing, do I have to,
it's kind of a crowded room, but, um.

Adam (05:27):
Do you want to write it on this small piece of paper and pass
it back to me negotiation style?

Mike (05:31):
No, I mean, that's okay, I'll just whisper, I mean, I'm a, I'm a virgin.
Okay.
I'm a virgin, okay.

Adam (05:38):
He's a virgin!
A, um, A is the, Uh, redflashing light, and siren goes
off, and balloons drop from the

Alex (05:47):
ceiling.
VIRGIN ALERT!
VIRGIN ALERT!
VIRGIN ALERT!
What

Adam (05:49):
the hell?
What

Alex (05:50):
the

Adam (05:51):
hell?
I'm sorry, we have to do that.
VIRGIN ALERT!
VIRGIN ALERT!
We have got a virgin at Henderson Sperm!
We have got a virgin, it'stime for him to earn his sperm!

Alex (06:02):
Yay!
Virgin everyone!
Hey!
That's the first one in two weeks.

Adam (06:07):
Sorry, I almost misspoke.
Here's a cum cake.
I was gonna say cupcake, but I misspoke.

Mike (06:12):
Do I have to eat it?
No.
It looks nasty, I'm gonna be honest.
It's not

Adam (06:16):
real.
It's not real.

Mike (06:17):
Oh, okay, okay.
Um, thank you.
It's coconut

Adam (06:22):
frosting.

Mike (06:22):
I really appreciate the penis shaped birthday hat, too.
That's

Adam (06:27):
We didn't provide, I think you brought that in.
We didn't provide that.

Mike (06:30):
Oh, no, you know what?
I stopped by the bachelorette party store.
Is it your birthday?
No, it's not.
It's not my birthday.
Um, no,

Adam (06:36):
listen.
What do you mean?
Sorry.
What do you mean you stopped bythe bachelorette party store?
We cut to Party City on the outsideof Lynbrook, which is closing.

Mike (06:47):
Hey,

Adam (06:47):
um.

Mike (06:48):
Sir,

Adam (06:48):
we're closing, sir.

Mike (06:50):
Yeah, but you see, no, you don't understand.
I have to, I have to buy, it's,it's my friend's bachelorette party.
I gotta, I gotta get a favor or something.
Do you have anything that like, I don'tknow, I could, I could do, it, just a
balloon or something would be great.

Adam (07:04):
Tommy.
Yeah.
Do we have anything in theback for this sad sweaty man?

Alex (07:09):
Uh.
Hey, I'm not that sweaty.
Oh, we have this.
I think someone left it behind.

Adam (07:15):
Oh, this, Is it supposed to be this wet?
We got the this is a paper birthdayhat shaped like a penis the balls
kind of Yo, don't you wait come back.
Don't you want to hear what the balls do?
No, I don't i'll find out later.
Don't twist them Sir.

Mike (07:34):
I'm sorry.
Why, sir? I got a black eye.
I just, uh, from the balls.
I, I, okay.
My friends have been makingfun of me because I'm a virgin
and I Siren goes off again.
Oh, come on, man!
Every time!
We've got a virgin at Henderson's Firm!
How many cum, how many cumcakes do you have in the back?
Cause this is the second one.

(07:55):
Six to a pan.
Okay.
Wow.
Kind of a

Adam (07:58):
small pan for a cupcake tray, but Had to make some budget cuts recently.
People are not depositing asmuch sperm as they used to.

Mike (08:07):
Oh, are they Same

Adam (08:08):
number of clients, just smaller Just smaller loads.

Mike (08:12):
I just Listen, my point is, I Okay.
I have not done the deed.
Okay, no alert.
Okay.
Um, and my friends havejust been making fun of me.
Now you found the loophole.
I, yeah, they've been, they'vebeen making fun of me constantly.
Unlike what you've

Adam (08:26):
done with women.
Found the hole.

Mike (08:30):
Thank you.
Thank you for that.
I, I appreciate it.
So you're, yes, you I, I, yeah, soI just, listen, I want them to stop.
And I really want them to leaveme alone, and like, let me be.
So it

Adam (08:42):
can't be

Alex (08:43):
that bad and they can't they wouldn't like excuse me.
You're holding up the line.
Oh my god It's Mike K. I know yougot I know you your buddy Adam was
telling me about how you can't fuckanyone I met him on the bus yesterday

Adam (08:57):
Excuse me.
Mr. Driver.
I don't have I I don'thave any form of payment.

Alex (09:03):
Get off the Oh my god, you're Adam Rudy!
Your friend Alex was telling me abouthow what a what a fucking dick you were!
Hey man, get off the bus.
No, you get off the bus.
You're a real dick.
You know who's a real dick?
My friend Adam.

Adam (09:16):
Well, yeah, I'm kind of a dick.
Um, but, Look, I can'tafford to get on the bus.
Can I give you some hot gossinstead, my friend Mike?
You'll know him when you see him.
You cannot fuck anybodyfor the life of him!

Alex (09:30):
Gasp.
So anyway, yeah, I heardyou can't fuck anyone.
Yeah, You want to tell me about someone?
I

Mike (09:35):
kinda, I, you've met everybody I know.

Alex (09:38):
He gets off on this.
Wow, you know two people and youcan't fuck either of them, huh?
Could you,

Mike (09:43):
listen, I'm in That's pretty sad.
I'm having a conversation withSylvia here, and you're kinda

Adam (09:47):
Steve, Steve, Steve, you can just, you can use the self checkout.
Okay, just remember to scanyour card so you get the points.

Alex (09:54):
Thank you.
I just can't calorie all fiveof these gallons on my own.
Can I get a bag?

Adam (09:58):
Uh, it's a five cent back tax, unfortunately, and
we do only have the paper.
You

Alex (10:02):
know what?
I'll just, I'll just deal.

Adam (10:03):
Okay.

Mike (10:06):
That was an acrobatic feat.
I've never, that's I'm shockedthat that pyramid was as stable
as it, as it actually looked.
That's, that, that was.

Alex (10:15):
Yeah, I'm a real jizz jockey.
Oh, he's still

Mike (10:17):
here.
Okay.

Adam (10:19):
Well, listen.
So you can't, you can't, uh.
I am not

Mike (10:23):
what the ladies would call a jizz jockey.
And.
I, I just got it.
Listen, my friends, I wantthis to stop being my primary
personality trait around my friends.
So the only way to stop thatis to prove to them that I've,
you know, banged a woman.
And so my thought is, instead of doing it,because that feels not great to like do

(10:46):
something with an ulterior motive, I wantto get some sperm, put it in a condom.
And then show that to themas like the physical evidence
that I've done it, you know?

Adam (10:59):
The smoking cum as it were.
Yeah, exactly.
Got it.
Can you help me out with that?
I'll make you a deal.
Oh, okay.
If you make a deposit In the next90 days or so, I will let you make
a withdrawal on a trial basis.

Mike (11:16):
Oh, I have to deposit in order to

Adam (11:20):
withdraw?
You gotta put as much in, it'slike social security, you gotta
put in before you can take out.
I

Mike (11:25):
feel like if that was the case, wouldn't that defeat the
purpose of a lot of men withdrawing?

Adam (11:31):
So from, okay, here's the schedule.
Okay.
Twelve to nine.
Yeah.
Kind of where we are.
Twelve to nine.
I meant to say nine to twelve,but actually twelve to nine.
Twelve to nine.
So noon to nine p. m. isopen season on withdrawals.
That's where we're in right now.
Okay.
Nine oh one to eleven fifty nine.
That's deposit time.

(11:53):
Oh!
The fellas come in, they You knowthe fellas, they fill up the tanks.
Yeah.
And then, and then they get, you know,they get paid and then they leave.

Mike (12:05):
Hi ho.
Hi ho.
Fill up this firm.
We go.
Oh God.
Oh.
Oh, okay.
I, alright.

Adam (12:10):
Yeah.
It's, uh, it's ni it's,uh, 8 59 right now.
So we're gonna have towrap this transaction.
I'll do it.
I'll do it.
I'll

Mike (12:15):
do it.
I'll take it right now.

Adam (12:16):
You will.
Okay.
Sign right here.
Yeah.
You must come back in 90 days.
Period.
You must C U M back in 90 days.
Sign.
Date.

Mike (12:27):
Mike Kvorkian.

Adam (12:31):
Okay.
Go over to the spigot, takethis cup, go over to the So you
see that refrigerator there?
It's got one of those things inthe door where you push the thing
down and the juice comes out?
I

Mike (12:42):
don't like the ice cream soft serve.
Uh, uh, system that you got over here.
Okay, we have

Adam (12:48):
another system though, which is, you know how a refrigerator
door sometimes will have a waterand crushed ice dispenser on it?
I hate this

Mike (12:54):
already.

Adam (12:55):
Go take your cup, go press the little flap in, and
it will come out as crushed ice.
Which is, it will take sometime to heat up, but just put
it in the sun for a few minutes.

Mike (13:05):
This is worse.
This is worse.
Do you want me to

Adam (13:07):
come up with a third system?

Mike (13:08):
I would love you to come up with a third system, actually.
Both of those kind of giveme, kind of skeeve me out.
Hose.
A hose?

Adam (13:19):
Hose.

Mike (13:19):
That seems like

Adam (13:20):
too much.
It's got the little thing onthe end so you can get the You
know, the little gun thing?
I'll do

Mike (13:26):
the ice cream.

Adam (13:27):
Okay, that's, that is the most popular choice.
Do you want to sign upfor the rewards program?
Goodbye, Sylvia.
Peace be with you.

Mike (13:34):
And with your spirit.

Alex (13:37):
Next to the, uh, machine is like a guy with like a little ice cream hat.
He's got a few like little cups infront of him and he's like, Would
you like a topping, sir? What?
Got gummy bears?

Mike (13:48):
No, no, I don't, I'm not, I'm not gonna eat this.
I don't want any food.
We got sprinkles.

Alex (13:54):
Uh, we got M& M's, we got cum in there.
Hey

Mike (13:56):
buddy, don't use up all the sprinkles.
I I'm not trying to useI got my kid with me.
Trying to That is not appropriate.
That is not okay.
I'm just saying,

Adam (14:05):
I got No, that's I'm talking about my cuff.

Mike (14:07):
No, that's Nuh uh.
No, sir, I'm gonna ask you to geta I Sylvia, can we remove this guy?
I don't like his vibe.
I I don't

Adam (14:15):
That's Michael Henderson.

Mike (14:17):
Mike, what the fuck?
I I just I Okay.

Adam (14:22):
Hey, it's a living.

Mike (14:24):
You have like three livings.
I have so many questions.
No, I'm not part

Adam (14:28):
of the clergy anymore We can talk about me later.
Please make your selectionso I can get my Sprinkles

Mike (14:34):
fine.
I'll take the pistachio

Alex (14:38):
issue and We have a fine selection of sperm flavors.
What race would you like?
What race?
I don't I I don't does it matter?
Random, it is, okay.
We'll do a swirl.

Mike (14:53):
Here

Adam (14:56):
you go, sir.

Mike (14:57):
Thank you.

Adam (14:57):
I'm so sorry, Jeff, don't forget to weigh it.
You know, price based on weight.
Sorry.

Mike (15:05):
No, hold on.
He's new,

Adam (15:07):
this is his first training.
I

Mike (15:08):
thought this was a withdrawal system.
I didn't realize that I actuallyhad to give real money to this.

Adam (15:14):
It's half a pound.
You're not paying for the sperm,you're paying for the Half a pound?

Mike (15:19):
Half a pound?

Adam (15:20):
On it or not.
You're not paying for the sperm,sir, you're paying for the toppings,
you're not paying for the sperm.
It's a lot of pistachios.
I don't need that many pistachios.
The pistachio, frankly, sir, ifyou were concerned about spending
money, the pistachios are the mostexpensive topping on the menu.

(15:40):
You can see right there, big board,all of the different toppings you
can get with prices next to them.
Prices by the pound.

Mike (15:50):
There is no part of this discussion where I need pistachio.
I was just doing it to move it along.
Can we get rid of the pistach I don't needhalf Half a pound of pistachio is crazy.
No matter what it's topping.
If I was just that's too

Adam (16:03):
many.
We cannot take pistachios outof your cup of sperm and put
them back into circulation.
That is disgusting.

Alex (16:12):
That's fun

Adam (16:12):
health.
That's gross.
You can trash

Mike (16:14):
it and I'll get a plain cup of, of Squirrel, and I can move on.
You

Adam (16:20):
almost said, And are you gonna pay for the pistachios that you've ruined?

Mike (16:23):
No, I don't want to.
I have a pound of pistachios.
There's so many.

Adam (16:29):
Sir.

Alex (16:30):
We have his card on file.
We

Adam (16:31):
have your card on file.
How did you get my card

Alex (16:33):
on file?
There you go.

Adam (16:34):
If you do not pay.
have this back.
If you do not pay, we willsend this to Cumlections.

Mike (16:41):
How much money?
Are the half pound of pistachios.
289.

Adam (16:44):
50 What

Mike (16:47):
the fuck, dude?

Adam (16:49):
And one smile.

Mike (16:51):
I'm not happy about this interaction.
I'm not, I'm not gonna.

Adam (16:55):
You must smile.

Mike (16:58):
You see, Mike S, Mike K Gives the most Just starts Bearing his
teeth like a chimpanzee Before attack,and grabs the cup And pays the 200.
00 Was that so hard?
You're on my fucking list, Tenderson.
Fucking Tenderson.

Adam (17:17):
That's my massage business.
Here, I'm Henderson.

Mike (17:21):
What did I

Alex (17:21):
say?

Adam (17:22):
Tenderson.

Alex (17:25):
Yeah, he said Tenderson.
My

Adam (17:27):
orthopedics business is called Tendonson.
And they just get morecomplicated as we go on.
It ends up being completely.
What's your dentist's name?
You should try his chicken, Tenderson.
My dentistry name?
It's Henderson.
That's that was the original one.
Oh, you're not gonna get me.
Okay, you're not gonna get me You'renot gonna pull one over on me.

(17:50):
Okay, you know what I've beendoing this for a long time, buddy.
You know what Henderson?
Yes,

Mike (17:56):
Mike throws the cup of pistachios and semen into his face

Adam (18:00):
Henderson does not react at all stone face.
You think that's the first timeanybody's ever done that to me,
buddy You should see my towels.
They are crusty as hell.
I come home end of everyday big wipe down the front,

Alex (18:17):
sir Can I just get another cup to go?
Yeah.
Okay.
Thank you.
pistachios?

Adam (18:24):
We see Mike walk outside of the sperm bank

Mike (18:29):
He's got a cover on the little cup, walking super carefully down the street.

Alex (18:36):
Hey buddy.
Huh?
That's a nice looking bowlof sperm you got there.

Mike (18:44):
I'm sorry, what?
I'm sorry, who are you?
Are you just, are you cat callingme because of my purchase?

Alex (18:53):
Nah, I'm just saying it's, it's a nice looking bowl.
I don't know how to react.
I don't know if I should say thank you, or

Mike (18:59):
if I should.

Adam (19:01):
What?
As this interaction is happening,this man is wearing a trench coat.
And he's flipping a coin.
Uh, is following Mike alongCatalpa underneath, and they
stop underneath an overpass.
You might call it an underpass.

Alex (19:15):
Yeah.
Hey, look, buddy.
All I'm, all's I'm saying is it's a nice,uh, it's a nice product you got there.
And I think in the right hands,it could be even more valuable.
I couldn't

Mike (19:27):
possibly fathom what you mean.

Alex (19:29):
Let's just say I'm in the market.
All right.
Why?
Because it's valuable.

Mike (19:36):
Oh, I, cool.
Okay, um, Great, I mean, listen.
This is kind of important to me.
This is already a super weird day.
This is not making me feelparticularly comfortable.
It's going to take a lot toget me to give this thing away.

Alex (19:51):
I've got something that might interest you.
I

Mike (19:54):
don't like the way you said that, Trenchcoat Man.

Alex (19:56):
How'd you know my name?

Mike (19:58):
Well, I just described you and put your gender or a pure gender at
the end of it and I, uh, you know

Alex (20:05):
Yeah, nice save Anyway, yeah.

Mike (20:08):
Hold on.
Okay, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to possiblymisgender you, Trenchcoat Man.
You just didn't seem likethe kind of guy that would.

Alex (20:15):
No, it's true.
I am a man.
Though, if you must know, I am sterile.
Which means I am in the market.
What?
I don't For nice bowls of sperm.
I don't think they ask.
Can I go home now?
No way, sir. I have something to offeryou for your delectable purchase there.
So if

Mike (20:33):
I say no to this, I can go home?
You're not gonna say no, pal.
Okay, I feel like I should, but okay.
Whatcha got?

Alex (20:41):
You, my friend, have the face of someone who likes Pokemon.
And I can tell that, becauseyou're clearly a virgin.
Let me show you

Adam (20:52):
Way off in the distance down the street.
Got a virgin!

Alex (21:00):
I've
got here one of the most valuablecards you could ever imagine.
And I don't think that's

Mike (21:11):
possible.
I don't think, I don'tthink that's possible.
Man, I, look, I just What do you got?
Why don't

Alex (21:16):
you just take a look?
That's a base set Charizardhere, PSA graded, in a 10.
These things last sold fora quarter million dollars,
and you could have one too.
That can't be real, aquarter million dollars?
That is factually correct,you can look it up.

Mike (21:38):
I, this is, that's crazy, I, man, yeah, I just wanna know,
how would I even go about sellingthis for a quarter million dollars?

Alex (21:47):
I don't know.
You could try trading itfor some sperm like I am.
That's working for me.

Mike (21:54):
I only paid about 200 for this and most of that was for pistachios.
I don't know how you'reflipping this for a quarter mil.

Alex (22:00):
Then it's your lucky day, pal.
Why do you question someone being nice?
All's I'm saying is I need sperm fast.
You're my guy.
I have this card.
I don't need it anymore What do you say?

Mike (22:16):
All right, trench coat man.
I'll take your deal

Alex (22:18):
You could always go get more of the white gold.
Give me.
Pleasure doing businesswith you, Kaborkian.
Are you not

Mike (22:25):
welc hold on.
I I walked in so easily.
Are you not welcome in the sperm bank?

Alex (22:32):
They don't like me.
Let's just put it that way.
Why?
What did you

Mike (22:35):
do

Alex (22:36):
in the sperm bank?
No one can know and live to tell the tale.
Hey, is this the sperm bank?
Uh, yes.
How can I help you, sir? I was wondering.
Is your refrigerator running?
I'm not allowed within 50 feet ofthe store for the hypocrisy and
evil that I did upon that business.

Mike (22:57):
Well, thanks for the card.

Alex (22:58):
Thanks for the juice.

Adam (23:02):
He walks up the side of the overpass and hops on top
and runs down Sunrise Highway.
Bobby,

Alex (23:15):
Bobby, we got it!
And he disappears.

Adam (23:18):
We cut to Lynbrook University.

Alex (23:22):
Hmm, so yeah, basically I'm immortal now, Adam.
That's cool.
I think that's great.
I'm working on this song.
Hey, guys!
Hey, Mike.
Weird that you knockedon your own dorm room.

Mike (23:31):
Well, I did, and I, I feel like the last time I was in here, I saw some things
that were not cool, so I decided to, uh,

Adam (23:37):
you mean yourself in the mirror?

Mike (23:39):
That's, no, I didn't.
Thanks.

Alex (23:40):
No, I mean, anyway, how's your day, Mike?

Mike (23:43):
Uh, it was pretty fucking great.
I'll tell you that.
Listen.
Yeah.
Well, you chuckle fucks.
We're sitting here doing dumbshit on that guitar or whatever.
I'm here.
This is a

Adam (23:53):
banjo.

Mike (23:54):
I was, it is a guitar.
It's a kind of guitar, and I, I was here.
Trading for this 250, 000 Pokemon card.
Look at this.
What?
No way.
Yeah.
This is a basic

Alex (24:07):
Charizard.
Base set.
Base set Charizard.
Okay.
Well, let me see it then.
Yeah, here you go.
Wow.
Base set, first edition.
Mike, this is not that.

Adam (24:16):
Mike, that's David Hasselhoff.
This is a Baywatch trading card.
No, it's not.
No,

Mike (24:21):
it's got the, it's got the tail.
It's got the, it's got the

Adam (24:24):
fangs.
No, it's David Hasselhoff

Mike (24:26):
shirtless on the beach.
Dammit, the, the, the sunlightglistening off his abs threw me off.
I thought there was fire.
Yeah, it's a

Adam (24:31):
holographic David Hasselhoff trading card from Baywatch.
With all the graphic apps.

Alex (24:37):
Let's see if it's worth anything.
Yeah, it might still be worth something.
It looks valuable.
Oh, cool.
Okay.
So this is interesting.
This card holds a Guinness world record.
Really?
It is the only card thatpeople will pay to get rid of.
Oh, no, Mike.
Yeah, apparently, like, the, the, the,like, the foil on it causes, uh, causes

(25:00):
sterile, gets you, makes you sterile.

Adam (25:02):
It does what?
Mike, it has a Surgeon General'swarning right on the back.
You didn't see this?
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Good job, buddy.
No, this is Well, Imean, it's interesting.
It's an interesting thing, andyou're such a fucking virgin, you
wouldn't have had kids anyway,so it's kind of like, you know

Mike (25:16):
But what if I

Alex (25:17):
did?
I just,

Mike (25:18):
I don't

Alex (25:19):
I'd say keep it away from me, but I'm a regular at the Henderson.
I,

Mike (25:22):
I just, I, I, I traded something valuable for this.
What do you have that's valuable?
Yeah.
Oh, I, I mean, I, I gotsomething that was valuable.
And now I have this thing instead.
I just, I don't know.
I, I traded some sperm for it, okay?

Alex (25:40):
Oh, what do you mean the old fashioned?
Okay, I mean by that.
I didn't

Mike (25:45):
know

Alex (25:45):
you were whoring

Mike (25:45):
yourself out I went to Henderson's I went to Henderson's you went

Adam (25:50):
to Henderson's which one?
the massage place the no thelong haul trucking Rental

Mike (25:58):
no that one closed down

Adam (26:00):
really hen.
Yeah, and hen toast sons Fenderson

Mike (26:06):
Better.
Yeah.
Yeah, Fenderson's closed down a while ago.
I, uh, it was, uh, yeah, no,I went to the sperm bank.

Adam (26:14):
The sperm bank.
You went to the sperm bank, and theyrejected you from donating, I assume.
No, they

Mike (26:20):
didn't reject, in fact, they actually made me sign a
mandate that I would come back.
That's unfortunate for them.

Adam (26:26):
With, you know, now that you've spoiled your product.
Your crop.

Mike (26:31):
Well, I didn't, we don't know that.
This is,

Adam (26:33):
where were you carrying the Hasselhoff card with the sterilizing foil?

Mike (26:40):
I went under the underpass that, uh, from Catalpa.
I don't

Adam (26:43):
mean where in the world did you acquire?
I mean, where on yourbody were you carrying it?

Mike (26:48):
Oh, right in the

Alex (26:50):
foreskin.
Mike, I didn't realize that you

Adam (26:54):
could pocket

Alex (26:55):
it like that.
That's impressive.
You know, good on you, buddy.
You know, people say that fashionis the buzz cut, but I'm glad you're
sticking to your guns, you know?

Adam (27:05):
You have The buzz cut?
You got, you were in that lawsuit withGuinness world's longest hair person.

Mike (27:13):
Yeah.

Adam (27:13):
Right?
Because you were claiming that yourforeskin was longer than their hair.

Alex (27:19):
I Yeah.

Mike (27:21):
I mean It was so long you

Alex (27:22):
called it five skin.

Mike (27:23):
Yeah.
I lost that lawsuit by the way.
I'm, I'm deeply in debt.
Well I mean as soon as they

Adam (27:28):
brought out the ruler you were done.

Alex (27:30):
Well why can't you get it back?
Who'd you give it to?
I gave it to Trenchcoat Man.
Oh I know that guy.
You know Trenchcoat Man?
Yeah, I, I, um, n nevermind.

Adam (27:42):
Oh, that was a furtive glance.
I don't think I've ever seenAlex glance that furtively.

Mike (27:47):
Yeah, no, he is not the secretive type.
You You might you did you dosomething illegal with Trenchcoatman?

Alex (27:55):
No.
Not illegal.
Alright, so you're gonna call theplace, and then you're gonna say,
Is your refrigerator running?
Got it.
He doesn't like me, that's for sure.

Mike (28:06):
Yeah, I I So, Do you but do you have his number?
Like, could we arrange a meetup?
Cause I I want if this is gonnagive me C cancer and various
other ailments as he said cancer.
Sterilization is

Alex (28:23):
not cancerous.
Mike,

Adam (28:24):
look, it says right here, it's gonna, the sunlight is going
to reflect off of the foil andboil your sperm in your balls.
That's science.
Internal hot

Alex (28:34):
tub.
Well, look, he hates me,and he already got Mike.
The only person he doesn't know is Adam.

Adam (28:41):
That's true.
I guess I could help you out.
I mean, I think it's important that weUndo what you undid Mike and get this
sperm back for whatever purpose whateveryou're gonna use it for hey I don't judge.
Okay.
Yeah, why

Mike (28:58):
did you want sperm anyway Mike?
Don't worry about it It was it was fora completely legitimate purpose that
doesn't involve tricking you guys at all.

Alex (29:07):
Oh, okay

Adam (29:08):
What do we think should I?
It, I think he shows up whenhe, you have something he wants.
Really?
Well he has sperm.
What, what do you, what is aman who has everything sperm?

Alex (29:20):
And a trench coat.
Neat.
You know, you know what you,where you go once you get sperms?
You go looking for eggs.
To the farm!

Adam (29:30):
To the farm!
Welcome to Limbrick University'sAgricultural Studies, uh, seminar class.
Uh, oh, gentlemen, just fillin the back there, latecomers.
Oh, okay.
Uh,

Mike (29:41):
Dr. Professor Farmer Brown, I have to Uh, questions

Alex (29:44):
at the end, Sonny.
Oh, but Come on, Mike,questions at the end.
It's just a short seminar.
It will only be a few minutes, I'm sure.

Adam (29:51):
So here, we're gonna kick off with the slide deck in just a second.
Guinness longest slide deck of all time.
And we're gonna be covering end toend the life cycle of the pistachio
from planting to picking to topping.
This is even what we're here for.
So, it all starts withfertilization, okay?

(30:13):
Yes, sir, in the back.

Mike (30:16):
Hi, um, yeah, it's me again.
Is that Mike?
Mike?
Yeah, it's, it's Mike Kevorkian.

Adam (30:21):
Oh, Mike Kevorkian, yes, I saw you.
You registered for this class and thendropped out because Why, why did you
drop out before this semester started?

Mike (30:30):
Um, uh, pistachios are yucky.
Uh, but I did want toask, um Do we have life?
You got

Adam (30:37):
pretty far in signing up for intro to pistachios before
you dropped out and made that, uh

Mike (30:42):
Yeah, but then I found out they're yucky.
I got two questions for you.
First of all Very importantly,how much does a typical half
pound of pistachios go for?

Adam (30:53):
What are we ta When are you doing this purchase?
2000 or 2025?
Cause in 2000 About twoand a half hours ago.
Okay, 2025?
573. 18 and 1.
86 smiles.
Wow Mike, sounds like you

Alex (31:10):
got a really good deal that you did not take.
We should go back there later.
Yeah, you're absolutely right.
Fuck the sperm, let'sjust go buy pistachios.
We

Adam (31:19):
cut back to, um, sorry, the boardroom of Henderson's empire.
He's standing at, he's got thelittle desk, like the little desk
where the president signs the laws.
There's a very old woman, like, youknow how when the president signs a
law, there's always some, like, thevictim's parent, or something, is there?
Standing behind him, yeah.

(31:40):
So he's, uh, Hendersonis at the little desk.
We've got the victims of the greatpistachio allergy, um, epidemic that
swept Lynbrook a couple years ago.
He's, tears are streaming down his face.
It is with great honorthat I hereby change thee.

(32:03):
Internal policy of Henderson Sperm Bank
to cut the price of pistachios in halfto discourage, I don't know how that
actually, sorry ma'am, I know that doesn'tbring your son back and if anything it
makes exposure to pistachios easier.

Mike (32:24):
It encourages consumption of pistachios, yeah,
this does not seem great.

Adam (32:30):
Well, we're lowering Well, he signed it already.
I signed it already!
Now show everyone.
It's a living.

Mike (32:38):
Hey, excuse me.
Yes, sir

Adam (32:40):
in the

Mike (32:40):
back.
Hi, my name is Tom HigginsI'm from the Lindbergh Mail.
I just have a question for youregarding the lawsuits associated with
the vehicular manslaughter epidemicat Fenderson's Trucking Company

Adam (32:52):
Um, I don't know what you're talking about.
That business does not existanymore and has never existed.
So close down.
It never

Mike (33:00):
existed.
I would like you to try to

Adam (33:03):
find it on the org chart behind me.
Henderson pulls down a world map sizedorg chart, which has so many branches.
Point out, point it out.
Do you see it?
Do you see Fenderson's anywhere on

Mike (33:17):
there?
There's a big X.

Adam (33:19):
You see my gymnastics team, Benderson.

Alex (33:21):
In the background, there's a, there's a guy in a suit going like.
We got one.
Take him out.

Mike (33:26):
Well, there's a big axe over Trump and you see, uh,
Higgins head just explodes.
He

Adam (33:32):
gets shot in the head with a pistachio.

Mike (33:35):
My follow up question, uh, was actually, could we, um, we
kind of need some of your eggs?
Is there a chance that we could

Adam (33:41):
get that?
You come to intro topistachios asking about eggs?
You do realize intro toeggs is on Wednesdays?

Mike (33:51):
Do you have eggs?

Adam (33:53):
Of course I have eggs, I run the whole I'm the dean of the
agricultural school, of course!
I have eggs, I've got a whole coop!

Mike (34:02):
Okay, great!
So can we make with the eggs?

Adam (34:06):
Class, look, I'll admit attendance is low, it's just you three.
Let's take a vote.
Do we wanna skip the slide deckso I can go help these guys?
With their little egg egg adventure.

Mike (34:20):
I'm I'm so sorry, Justin.
I know that you were really lookingforward to this class, but, uh,
we gotta we gotta That's okay,

Alex (34:26):
I can't wait.

Mike (34:28):
Justin,

Adam (34:28):
you're really cool, Justin.
He's

Alex (34:30):
like, all the way in the back.

Adam (34:31):
Justin, I can't physically can't email you the slide deck, Guinness
is longest, but I will put it on ahard drive, and You can borrow that
so you can review the material.
That's okay, I printed it out.
Oh, Jesus!
Oh my God!
That's Is that Guinness largest stack?

Mike (34:49):
A little guy runs in.
Uh, a small little guy.
Hey, I'm Guinness!
Uh, I'll measure this thing real quick,but I only have a, uh I think it's so

Adam (34:59):
unfair that as part, as the condition for being named world's
smallest man, you have to verifyall of the Guinness records.
That's unfair.

Mike (35:08):
Yeah, and they also, they also made me change my name to Guinness.
Uh, it was, yeah.
It's really unfortunate.
But, um, no one is, uh, shorterthan one foot three inches, so, uh.

Alex (35:21):
Anyway!
This is gonna take a while.
Let's go get those eggs.
Anyway,

Adam (35:24):
fellas.
Sorry, Guinness.

Mike (35:31):
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'll do this quietly.

Adam (35:35):
Alright fellas, let's go.
He's got a lot of work to do.
Justin's got a lot of work to do.
Let's go to the back.
Um, This class was takingplace in a greenhouse.
He steps, he opens up the doorsof the greenhouse and they step
into this full working farm onthe campus of Lynbrook University.
It's also got, like, uh, The horticulturegarden, where all these exotic plants

(35:58):
are, as well as, um, couple fields.
Crop rotation, a couple of themare lying fallow for the season.
But there's a huge field ofpistachios, there's corn, and then
at the very back is a chicken coop.
So, uh, as you can see, here's my coop.
I've got, um, about 14hens and one rooster.

(36:19):
He keeps busy.
Just a little fucking joke.

Mike (36:26):
Oh, oh, it's about banging.
Oh, he's a virgin.

Adam (36:29):
Oh, yeah, you know, I saw that on your transcript.
Yeah.
Do

Alex (36:35):
you hear

Adam (36:36):
that?
Clapping did you hear that?
Is that a siren?

Mike (36:41):
Wait,

Adam (36:41):
it's on my transcript

Mike (36:42):
now

Adam (36:44):
Anyway, you said you need eggs

Mike (36:47):
Yeah, yeah.
No, I'd like um, how many doyou think Alex four dozen or so?
Uh, yeah,

Adam (36:53):
at least that many.

Mike (36:54):
You know what, uh, we'll

Adam (36:54):
take

Mike (36:55):
all

Adam (36:55):
of them.
Alright, let's do some quick math.
I said I have 14 hens.
Yeah.
Okay?
Yeah.
As soon as they lay eggs, I takethe eggs, bring them to market.
I spend a lot of time at market, son.

Alex (37:11):
Is that any relation to Henderson?
Markitson.

Adam (37:16):
Cut very quickly to Michael Henderson cutting big ribbon with big
scissors in front of a grocery store.

Mike (37:22):
I got a question!
Pistachio takes the guy

Adam (37:26):
out.
So, it's gonna be a minuteif we want four dozen.
I can offer you fourteen rightnow, haven't gone to market yet.
I was about to do my long slideso I didn't think I'd have time.
Fourteen's fine.
Okay, is that enough?
Yeah, we can make fourteen work.
Yeah, we'll make 14 work.
Are you sure you guys don't wantto hang out for a little bit?
Nope.
We could watch Pineapple Express.
Which is what I call my, uh,hydroponic pineapple farm.

Mike (37:50):
Oh.
I would I'm glad, because, you know,Pineapple Express is overrated.

Adam (37:55):
I was an associate producer on the movie Pineapple Express,
so I'm I'll thank you to shut yourfucking mouth and get out of here.
Take these fucking eggs,and get off my goddamn farm.

Alex (38:05):
Wow, okay.

Adam (38:06):
Don't disrespect My life's work.
Look, you see all this aroundyou, that's not my life's work.
My life's work isworking with my man Judd.
Working with Seth.
Working with Jonah.
Working with Franco, not so much.
But I love those guys and I willnot hear a word said against them.

(38:27):
Fuck you!
Very wide Uh, shot, like a verywide, like, Wes Anderson type of
still shot of the overpass that, uh,Sunrise Highway uses to cross Catalpa.
And we see the three ofus climbing over the side.

(38:47):
We're having a lot of trouble.
Guys,

Alex (38:50):
I miss the recreational vehicle.
Yeah, it's really sucked since we have,

Adam (38:54):
we've had to walk everywhere, take the fucking bus,
which I never have money for.
I have to trade gossip for my bus fare.
Jesus, and I'm all out of gossip.
I

Mike (39:02):
blame, I blame Wimbrook's poor urban planning.
This shouldn't be.
Hey, I tried my best!
You did nothing!

Adam (39:13):
So, this is where you last saw him, Mike?
You saw him climb up the overpassand then run across Sunrise Highway?

Alex (39:19):
Yeah, he walked upside down on it, too.
Well, anyway, uh, Trenchcoat Man showsup when, uh, you least expect him.
So, I think, Adam, if you're alonewith the eggs, Mike and I, we can hide.
Okay.
Maybe he'll pop around.
Do you

Adam (39:30):
think that's his, uh, his place right there?
That, uh, truck?
That, it, I think it says It usedto say Fenderson's, but it, that
looks like it's gotten scratchedout and it says trench code

Alex (39:43):
on it.
We could check at least, it's right here.

Mike (39:47):
Yeah, I mean, I'm, I'm scared.
I know, it got

Adam (39:50):
really stormy really fast.
It started raining, whichit almost never does here.
It's really weird.
Yeah.
Okay.
I guess, alright, hand me the eggs.
And we, we're sure we, wecan only handle them loose.
We don't think that there's a bagor a container that we can use?

Mike (40:11):
No, no, they

Adam (40:11):
come in dozens and we have fourteen.
That wouldn't be useful.
Classic hot dog bun situation.
That's a good point.
Alright, I'll take these over there.
You guys, you know.
Get close, but keep your distance.
We don't want to spook him.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

(40:32):
Hello?
Hello?
You may enter.
It's completely pitchblack inside as I climb up.

Alex (40:42):
Sorry, let me get the light.
He's in his jammies.

Adam (40:46):
Yeah, one little exposed light bulb with long chain.
And it kind of looks like, it looksvery similar to, I don't know if
you guys have seen the show, Rayand Deborah Barone's living room.
Except kind of like a, a like, bizarroversion of it, where like the couch is all
ripped up, and the stairs lead to nowhere.

(41:08):
It's very creepy.

Alex (41:09):
He's sitting, Trenchcoat Man is sitting in a chair, and he's petting the
jar of sperm like it's a cat on his lap.
I have not seen your uglymug around here before.
What can Trenchcoat Man get for you?

Adam (41:24):
That's the thing.
I actually have something that Iwonder if you might be interested in.

Alex (41:29):
I see.
Present.

Adam (41:31):
I lift up my shirt where I was holding the eggs under
to keep them from getting wet.
Hot

Alex (41:37):
tamale.
What do you think?
Look at those shiny white guys.

Adam (41:41):
And look at these, that I'm holding.

Alex (41:44):
Alex,

Mike (41:44):
Alex and Micro, Alex and Micro standing in the background,
just kind of standing there.
Listening

Adam (41:49):
in the rain.

Alex (41:51):
I like these guys.
Uh, you know.
This is 14 eggs.
I, you know, I alwaysthought twelve wasn't enough.
I

Adam (41:59):
agree.

Alex (42:00):
Uh, and you know, ever since the bird flu epidemic, it's been
hell trying to get me some eggs.
I

Adam (42:04):
know.
Well, I've got a source.
What can I say?

Alex (42:07):
I see, I see.
Trenchcoat is intriguedby this pro by this offer.
Now, what I think I can offer for youinstead is a small packet of cocaine.

Adam (42:24):
Do you happen to have anything a little more valuable?
Heroin?
Mmm, I'm thinking of adifferent kind of white stuff.

Alex (42:34):
Ah!
Never melting snow.
Used by Santa Claus to heighten hisappearance whenever he shows up.
What does that mean?
Just sprinkle it inthe air, it's asbestos.

Adam (42:47):
Do you happen to have any semen?

Alex (42:51):
Ah You're here for the, uh For the jizz, I see.
The cum, if you will.
Ah, yes, we're bothgentlemen here, of course.
Well, my friend, I'm afraid I'mall sold out of the white glitter.

Adam (43:10):
Well, what's that right there?
That you're That's white glitter.
Holding on your ass.
Sorry, I meant to say lap.
That you're holding on your lap.
What's that right there?

Alex (43:20):
I don't know what you're talking about.
The lack of egg is clogging my mind.
What if

Adam (43:27):
I give you a little taste?
I see you've got your littleknife there for tasting cocaine.
What if you cut openone of these eggs, and

Alex (43:35):
He takes an egg and cuts off like a third of it, but the
egg does not break or shatter.
Clean slice, he eats the shell.
That's good shit.
Blue, yellow, pink, I don't care whatevercolor, just bring me more of these.
Anyway.
Uh, yeah, that's pretty good.

(43:55):
I'd say that's worth, uh, I don't know.
Uh, two loads worth?
Only two?

Adam (44:05):
Well,

Alex (44:05):
if you want three, you want three loaves,

Adam (44:08):
give me a second.
Okay.
Right back.
I'm taking theseRemaining 13 eggs with me.

Alex (44:15):
I'm gonna eat the rest of this one.

Adam (44:17):
All right, you're welcome to it.
That's good Go back out inthe rain Guys, you get it.
Well, here's the thing.
He's offering Two loads, I mightbe able to get him up to three.
Is that enough for whateveryour purpose is, Mike?

Alex (44:30):
I mean, it's more about the principle though, right?
Like, Mike had his wholethings taken from him.

Adam (44:34):
Mike, how many, how many loads or load equivalents did
you give him for the card?
Well,

Mike (44:39):
I mean, I only gave, I didn't count because after I picked out the pistachios,
it was unclear as to how much was left.
Mike,

Alex (44:46):
was it a small, medium, or large?
Wait, it wasn't jumbo, was it?

Mike (44:50):
No, it was medium.
It was medium.
Um, Ah, that's 20

Alex (44:52):
loads.

Mike (44:54):
20?
I bought 20 loads?

Alex (44:56):
Yeah, I don't know what you were thinking, man.
Yeah, I don't know either.
No wonder it was so expensive.

Mike (45:01):
But here's the thing, I kind of want more because, you know, he robbed me of my
ability to reproduce, so Well, Mike, how

Adam (45:09):
long has it been?
It's been, what, two hours?
Yeah.
The timer, the digital timerthat's built into the card?
With the little, uh, skulland crossbones above it.
It says you still have 60 minutes.

Mike (45:21):
Oh!
There's a countdown?

Alex (45:23):
Yeah, and Mike, who knows?
You could have beensterile the whole time.
You've never had sex, so how can we know?
Yeah, that's true.

Mike (45:29):
Okay, thank you for, thank you for reminding me.
That is, that is, that is a good point.
Alright, I, so, you know what?
Yeah, get, get 20 if you can.
If you can't, then I'lltake whatever you got.

Adam (45:37):
So between 20 and 0 is acceptable to you?

Mike (45:41):
I would, I would appreciate greater than two, but less than twenty.

Adam (45:45):
Between

Mike (45:45):
two and twenty.
Why do I want Is That Much Cum, actually?
I really only need one or two.
Why do I want Is That

Adam (45:50):
Much Cum?

Alex (45:52):
That's a, that's a hat we gotta put on a shirt.
Why do I want Is That Much Cum?
If you didn't think this

Adam (45:59):
show was an extended stroke before, no pun intended.
So between two and twenty loads?
Yeah, I guess.
Let's go.
You guys come a little closer.
I think I might, he's given kind of Ithink he could pounce at any moment.

(46:21):
I think if you guys just wantto like get hide right in front
of the doors of the truck.
Okay.
So I've conferred with my colleagues.

Alex (46:30):
Ah, so have I.
All 20 million of them.
He holds up the jar.

Adam (46:39):
Can I Can I get you up to 20 loads?

Alex (46:43):
You see, my friend, that's this whole jar.
And if I give you the whole jar,then I only have 800 jars left.

Adam (46:51):
Can I ask you a question?
Yes,

Alex (46:54):
you may.

Adam (46:54):
What are you doing with all of this sperm?

Alex (47:00):
That is for a project called Operation Soaring Eagle, and it is
above your pay grade, my friend.

Adam (47:06):
We cut back to Henderson's boardroom, where he and Trenchcoat
Man are sitting on opposite endsof the very long conference table.
All of the heads of the various HendersonEnterprises are lining the sides of it.
It's about 800 people.
That old woman, the woman whose sondied from the pistachios is still there.

(47:29):
Trenchcoat man, do youunderstand the assignment?

Alex (47:32):
Absolutely, sir. It's an easy one.
Just gotta get all the sperm Ican so we can jack up the prices.
Literally.

Adam (47:41):
Don't you mean jack off the prices?

Alex (47:44):
Absolutely.
Very funny sir.

Adam (47:46):
Everyone fake laughs.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Alex (47:50):
Dilute the jizz with pistachios and other various ingredients.
And then, uh.
Yeah, we do, we do, uh, we do a ScroogeMcDuck, but instead of gold, it's cum.
That's right.
Yes.

Mike (48:07):
Hey, I, I, I have a question.

Alex (48:10):
Yeah,

Adam (48:11):
what's up?
Sorry, just so we're all clearon the visual, we're trying
to, we're trying to amass a

Alex (48:16):
room

Adam (48:16):
full of cum.
Imagine, imagine if youwill, a pool of milk.
That I am going to Dive into,and do, backstroke in, and
etc. Okay, are we all clear?

Mike (48:30):
No, I got it, I just, I, first of all, it's very nasty, and
second of all, with all of the Shot

Alex (48:35):
the head with a pistachio.

Adam (48:36):
Anyone else have any problems with Operation Soaring Eagle?
Anybody have any better names?
Maybe something thatkind of eludes to come.
I can pull the whiteboard down ifwe want to workshop it a little bit.
Pretty good.
Anyone get the load,load another pistachio.

(48:57):
And just in case someone has somethingbetter and we got to get rid of this.
Anybody have anything better?
Operation White Duck.
Operation White Duck.

Mike (49:08):
Operation Overload.

Adam (49:11):
That's it!
Operation Overload!
Yeah!

Mike (49:14):
The two people that suggested the other two names get shot in the head.
Everyone rips their

Adam (49:19):
shirts off.
They stand up.
They're swole as hell.
They flip the very long table.
Trenchcoat Man is just sittingin his chair, calmly, ready
to execute on the plan.

Alex (49:29):
Yeah.
That's what this has all been about,so the world's richest man can swim
around in a pool of other men's jizz.
I can't let him down.

Adam (49:40):
What did you say?

Alex (49:41):
Nothing, sir.

Adam (49:42):
You were muttering there for a

Alex (49:43):
second.
So Nah, we're cool.
Uh, look.
It's an important It's importantthat I get as much as I need.
That much is clear.
However, I skipped breakfast.
And, if I know me, This stuff will endup back in my grass before we know it.

(50:05):
He throws it to ya.

Adam (50:08):
Catch it, one hand.

Alex (50:10):
Leave the eggs out in the rain.
I like my breakfast soggy.

Adam (50:17):
Did I, did I win?
Did I win this?

Alex (50:22):
You did good, kid.
Alright.
Don't tell the boss.

Adam (50:25):
Alright.
It's been a pleasure working with you.

Alex (50:29):
I don't know who you are, and I don't plan to learn.
Okay.
Goodbye.
Goodbye.
I like

Adam (50:37):
trench coat, man.
We cut to the dorm room.
We're all sitting around.
So we cut back to the dorm room.
The three of us are sitting inchairs around the coffee table.
The cup of jizz is the only thing on it.
We're staring at it silently.
Well, Mike, uh, now that you've got thecum, what were you gonna do with it?

Mike (51:05):
Mike reaches into his back pocket, pulls out a condom, unravels it.

Adam (51:13):
We watch him silently, stone faced, as he unravels the condom.
Like a

Mike (51:20):
little tablespoon.
He's got a Pours the coke into the cup.
Like it overfills a little bit.
It overflows.
It's, it's messy.
It drips everywhere.

Alex (51:33):
Just stone face watching you.
We just watch him as

Adam (51:35):
he moves.
By the way, 20 loads worth of jizz.
Into one condom.
Methodically into the condom.
He completes the task.

Mike (51:48):
Guys, I, I had sex.

Alex (51:51):
Holy shit, what?
You had sex?
No way!
He did it!
Adam, can you believe this?

Adam (51:58):
Mike, that's not sex.

Alex (52:01):
What?

Adam (52:02):
No.

Alex (52:02):
You don't know that.
Common condom, that means sex.

Adam (52:07):
I'm sorry, try again.
Better luck next time, buddy.

Alex (52:11):
Yeah, wow, that is almost 30 years of, uh, virgin buildup right there.

Mike (52:15):
Can we take it out of my transcript now?
That's not up to us.
I don't like my

Adam (52:20):
professors knowing that.
Mike, what have you learnedfrom this experience?
I And it's not how to have sex, clearly.

Mike (52:27):
Yeah.
I learned that DavidHasselhoff makes men sterile.

Adam (52:35):
Fair.
Yeah, you get Fair.
Make sure you get rid ofthat card, by the way.

Mike (52:40):
Yeah, no, I sold it off to a guy.
I sold it off, I mean,I gave him another 289.

Adam (52:45):
You need to stop spending hundreds of dollars every day.

Mike (52:52):
You can't make me.

Adam (52:53):
I strongly, as your accountant, majoring in accountancy, by the
way, I strongly advise you not to.
Accountancy!
Accountancy, not accounting!
This is a little more mystical,so it's kind of a cross
between accounting and sorcery.
Um, cook the books, meaning in a bigcauldron, um, et cetera, you know.

(53:17):
I'm a wizard with numbers, what can I say?
But you, you will still do the verycomplicated, um, three number average
that we do at the end of every episode.
Yeah, yeah, you got it.
It's not that complicated.
Just because I'm low onmagic points right now.
So you want to do the podcast?
Yeah, podcast.
Okay, can you please putyour condom anywhere else?

Mike (53:40):
I worked so hard for this thing.

Alex (53:44):
We're going to look at it the whole time.
Yeah.
Okay, so if you

Adam (53:48):
skip ahead to the episode discussion in the podcast, just know that what
you missed is that Mike is holdingthroughout our entire discussion, Mike
is holding a drastically overfilledcondom full of God knows who's ejaculate.

(54:10):
Welcome to the Barone Zone!
We are talking about Season 4,Episode 17 of Everybody Loves Raymond.
Hackidu, where Ray tries to learnabout Ally's favorite card game.
Yay!
Another in our seriesof Season 4 classics.
Am I right, fellas?

Alex (54:30):
Absolutely.
I mean, this one rang extra close to homebecause I, this is, I mean, we, we've
talked about it before we, we recordeda little bit, but this, this is the
Pokemon, uh, equivalent, uh, like this.
This is the Pokemon

Mike (54:44):
episode.

Alex (54:44):
This, this lines up exactly when the Pokemon craze first began,
especially the Pokemon cards andlike the whole joke of the parents.
Uh, generation was like, thegotta catch em all slogan was
just ergo, like, buy all our shit.
Uh, and you can see it in here,uh, plenty of other, uh, shows from
this time did something similar.
My Mind Goes to South Park immediately,uh, with their Chimpokamon,

(55:08):
uh, episode, which translatesto penis monster in Japanese.
Yes.
Sorry, that was a side tangent.
I learned that yesterday.
I was like, ooh, that's fun.
Did you go seeking thatinformation, or did it find

Adam (55:19):
its way to

Alex (55:20):
you?
No, I just found like a South Park factsvideo, and I was like, I guess I'll watch
this instead of, you know, doing my job.
Anyway,

Adam (55:27):
yeah, no, I think we all remember Pokemon from growing up and It was
a sensation the games the cards

Mike (55:37):
Still is very much.
So it's still the I think it still has, itstill has the record of the, uh, the most
profitable media franchise of all time.

Adam (55:45):
Is that Guinness?

Mike (55:46):
Yeah.

Adam (55:47):
Yes.

Mike (55:48):
Yeah.
No, like genuinely between the videogames, the cards, the shows, the movies.

Alex (55:52):
Ain't even close.
More than anything else.
I think Star Wars is second.
Wow.
Um, but yeah, it's, it's a very far divideand frankly, I mean, I, I, I'm still very
caught up in that scene and recently,in recent events, if you are a Pokemon
person like, you know that the Pokemoncard craze is like insane right now with
all the price manipulations and likecards that were like three dollars a few

(56:13):
months ago are running like for 40 bucks.
Um, they're being artificially invaded.
Wow.
Interesting.
My personal collection hasalso skyrocketed in value,
but it's not gonna stand.
It's not gonna stay.

Adam (56:26):
Do you, do you have any options for like a fast liquidation?
Like, get out quick?

Alex (56:30):
No, and I, I, I don't want to.
I'm more into the, if I wanted to makemoney, I wouldn't buy Pokemon cards.
It's a stupid investment,but it's fun to collect.

Mike (56:39):
It's famously not good.
There's also, I've also found, so firstof all, I think it's goes without saying
that I love Pokemon still to this day,as does Alex, I think it's fair to say.
Um, what I have also pickedup on is that because many.
Social media websites haveclamped down on gambling videos.

(57:02):
They have instead startedto do, uh, opening Pokemon
card, uh, uh, Pokemon cards.
As a way of seeing, okay, didwe get the most valuable one?
And so on.
And I So, first of all, that'spredatory, and that's awful, and all
that stuff, but man, I can't look away.

(57:24):
It is interesting.
There's this one, uh, thing that I sayis just like, we're gonna keep opening
packs of Pokemon cards until we get athousand dollars worth of Pokemon cards.
Dude's been opening it for over amonth, he currently has 350 worth
of Pokemon cards, and is 800 inthe hole of buying the packs.
So, uh, yeah.
So

Alex (57:43):
it's, it's never a good investment, um, unless you keep your
stuff sealed, um, because packs fromthe 90s are currently going for Like
hundreds, if not thousands of dollars.
Um, and that is worth more thanbasically anything you can find in
them, except for that esteem Charizardin, uh, the base set packs, which

(58:06):
are the very, what does that mean?
Uh, base set is thefirst release of Pokemon.
It was just like the first set theyreleased, uh, contained, I think
a hundred cards, most of them inpristine condition are very valuable.
Um, not like insane levels, like.
You could probably get like mint conditioncards for like five, six hundred dollars

(58:29):
if they are properly graded with agrading company just like regular packs
or regular cards just like from yourchildhood binder and they're kind of beat
up you still get a good chunk of moneyfrom those but um, yeah I think the one
of the most expensive cards ever sold wasthat Charizard that was professionally
graded as a 10 and it sold for likeI think a quarter million dollars.

(58:50):
Geez.
Um.
Which, honestly, I do think ismore than what it's actually worth.
There are quite a few of those.
Uh, floatin around, but,you know, it's Charizard.
It's Charizard.
And it's the first one, so.
But it's, it is amazing to me, andI'm sure Mike can remember seeing,
like, the old packs in the storewhen we were kids, and they're like,

Mike (59:08):
Yeah.

Alex (59:09):
Like, those packs that are now insane, like, insanely
valuable, like, they couldn'tgive those away in the mid 2000s.
Like, I went to Maddie's ToyShop, and I could get, like, like,
three of them for five bucks.

Adam (59:21):
Is that a small Linbrook toy shop?
Yes, it was.
Really?
Yeah.
Tell me about this place.

Mike (59:27):
Actually, it still is, right?
It's still there.
I don't know if it is, but,uh, yeah, it's, it was this
place called Maddie's Toy Shop.
Are we saying M A T

Adam (59:35):
T Y or M A D D I E?
I think it's D E T T Y. Oh,

Alex (59:39):
I thought it was T T Y. No, you're right, you're right, you're right.
Yeah.
You said that and it immediately hit me.
It's critically

Adam (59:44):
important.

Mike (59:45):
Uh, there was a train in the logo.
Um, yeah, that's,

Adam (59:51):
uh,
No, it was like, it was,

Mike (59:56):
it was going like, it was like almost like it was underlining
the, uh, the, the Maddie's toy shop.

Alex (01:00:01):
All right.
So it is still open.
I just looked it up.
Oh, good.
It's technically, oh, I'm lookingat the one in Rockville Center.
May as well be in

Adam (01:00:10):
Russia.

Alex (01:00:12):
I mean, that's like five minutes away.
It is

Adam (01:00:14):
still, you got to take a point.
Yes.

Alex (01:00:16):
The one we're thinking of is in Hewlett technically, but it's
right down the road from Lynbrook.
It is still open.
Hmm.
Shout out.
I bet they would sponsor.
Maddie's Toy Shop.
I went in there like five years agoand it's fricking last to the past.

Mike (01:00:31):
I want to pick Adam's PR brain for a second.
Do you think Maddie's Toy Shop wouldsponsor this episode of The Barone Zone?

Adam (01:00:38):
Maybe not this episode, but an episode.
Squish.
We're going to have toclean the ceiling now.
Well, that's interesting.
Um, but in this episodeSuffice to say, yeah.

Alex (01:00:56):
Pokemon cards are very, very interesting to learn about.
I encourage you, if you are interested, tolearn about the history of, like, uh, the
collection, the collecting, the pricings.
Cause, honestly, like, seeing thecorrelations in this episode, I mean,
the The, the, the, the card Ally wantsis, I think, an equivalent to either

(01:01:17):
Charizard or Mewtwo or Gyarados, like a,like a popular card from back in the day.
And those were, at this time,going for, like, maybe 20 bucks.
Um, maybe 30 if you get, like, scammed.
So, I mean, by cor the law of correlation,uh, Ally's trading card, if she didn't
fold it at the end of the episode,would be insanely valuable today.

Adam (01:01:38):
I wonder, um Yeah, I think, what is the little guy that, uh,
your guy, Charizard, starts as?

Mike (01:01:49):
Charmander.
Oh, okay,

Adam (01:01:50):
so that's not exactly, like, Scramasaur, but it's kind of the same
construction of, like, uh, sound plus,like, a dinosaur word or something.
Yeah,

Alex (01:01:59):
yeah.
It's just like a collection ofanimal bullshit that forms a word.
That's Pokemon.
Here's what we

Adam (01:02:04):
got.
Venipod.
Rainwiffle.
E Jazz.
Scramasaur.
And, uh, what is the other one?
It's like Squal Squalawag or something.
I will say Venipod

Alex (01:02:19):
is Venipod is very close to a Pokemon that got invented,
like, almost 20 years later.
Venipede.
They should sue.
Well, I was also thinkingit's close to Venonat.
And Venonat, you're right, and Metapod.
It's a combination of Venonat and Metapod.

Adam (01:02:33):
You're saying Menopause?

Alex (01:02:35):
Yes, Adam.
We're saying Menopause.
That's a Pokemon.
That's a monster that you can catch, yeah!

Adam (01:02:41):
Hey, it's perfectly natural.
It's just a different phase of life.

Alex (01:02:47):
Um, regardless, that is, yeah.
I just want to move on.
Don't

Mike (01:02:51):
try to moralize on this podcast.
What are you doing?
I'm not.
No, I'm not talking to you.
Oh, I'm sorry that

Adam (01:02:56):
normalizing menopause is so offensive to you, Mike.

Mike (01:03:02):
Uh, no, I, I stand against.
Adam,

Alex (01:03:05):
Mike, we are a diverse panel of white guys.
Let us have this.

Adam (01:03:10):
Alright, so this episode, the proxy for Pokemon is Hakkidoo.
And apparently it's Korean, unlikePokemon, which is Japan, right?
Japanese?
Yes, that's correct.
It is Japan.
I noticed

Alex (01:03:22):
that as well, and I think they did it mainly because of,
uh Because of Frank's previous,uh, relations with Korea.
It absolutely was

Adam (01:03:30):
just to set up the line, This is the work of the North Koreans.
Which did, yeah, and also,yeah, the North Korea

Mike (01:03:35):
thing.
That was a good line.

Adam (01:03:36):
Let's talk about, uh, So, there's the first scene, like the cold
open, And then the first full scene.
And then they go back to it later.
This is setting up for theschool carnival in the gym.
What a set!
What a set, a school gym set.
I think we'll see it again, I feel likeI've seen it before, maybe I'm just
thinking of this episode, but, new set.

(01:03:59):
Um, Ray's complaining about helping,Debra's like, oh, you should be more
like Bill Parker, Bill Parker, whoof course is played by David Hunt,
Patricia Heaton's real life husband.
Um, so, uh, you should be more likeBill Parker, he goes helps Bill
Parker put something together, hurtshimself with a screwdriver, and, uh,
that's when Tyler, Parker and Allierun up with their Hackidu cards.

(01:04:25):
Now, bear with me for a secondbecause I didn't look up Tyler.
But, Tyler is played by ScottyLeavenworth, who, um, was one
of the baby geniuses apparently.
Um, he's actually been in a lot of stuff.
I wish I had done this researchbeforehand, but, uh, he was in, uh, Aaron

(01:04:47):
Brockovich, and he was in Donnie Darko,and he was on the Drew Carey show, one
episode, Bones, uh, now, of course, hegoes by Scott Leavenworth, uh, instead
of Scotty, cause, you know, he's grownup, he's an adult now, um, but anyway,
he and Allie run up, they've got thesecards, Ray, um, Apparently Allie trades

(01:05:08):
all of her cards for one of, uh, notScotty, Tyler's cards, uh, Scramasaur.
Don't get blood on him, she tellsRay, which I thought was funny,
from his, uh, screwdriver injury.
I also like the line, Parker,you can't believe how much
they love the Hackidu, Ray.

(01:05:29):
I can believe anything you canprobably more his weird like ray
is so bad at even toxic masculinityLike that he his attempts to compete
with parker are so They're funny.
They're legitimately funny.
Yeah, can we also talk

Mike (01:05:45):
about how he?
How his attempt at be at assertingmasculinity is just trying and failing
to be an absolute douchebag to his wife.
Yes, and

Adam (01:05:54):
telling Parker, I gotta put her in her place sometimes like Okay, Ray

Alex (01:06:00):
What an idiot.
And that's kind of whathe was raised on, right?
That's true.
In his childhood, Frank wasthe alpha male, and Oh, that's
really interesting, actually.
We can see where, uh, where, where he getskind of his idea of, like, masculinity.

Adam (01:06:14):
Or at least where his idea of how to relate with
other men, you know, comes from.
Absolutely.
It's like, oh, all my idealized versionof a man is my father, and so if I want
to relate to men, gotta act like Frank.
Better talk about the North Koreans.
Um.
Yeah, no, that's reallyinteresting, but Parker makes

(01:06:36):
Tyler give all of the cards back.
He's like, oh, that was a bad trade.
You shouldn't have done that.
That's not fair to Allie.
Um, and then Ray, you know,they run off, Ray sneaks out.
I thought this was a pretty good setup,and I didn't, I wasn't certain where the
episode, I think I've seen it before,but I wasn't certain where the episode

(01:06:57):
was going to go from this setup of,

Mike (01:07:00):
yeah, this is one of the few.
Well, I shouldn't say few, butthis is one of those episodes that
I actually remember, so I knewimmediately what was going on.
Uh, so, uh, I appreciate yourperspective of, like, just
being completely in the blank.
No, I

Adam (01:07:11):
got some satisfaction out of finding out that Parker had,
was kind of playing Rey in this.
to hold on to the Scramasaur,which as we find out is worth
all of 65, which is 120 today.
Um, yeah, we find out in that next scenethat, uh, so Deborah is very mad at Rafer.

(01:07:34):
Uh, undoing Allie's hacky doo trade, um,which I feel like is kind of justified.
I think there's some

Mike (01:07:42):
She's entirely right.

Adam (01:07:43):
Yeah.
There's some, um, even if it was abad trade, like, I don't know, like

Mike (01:07:50):
No, you let the kid live with it.
Like, that's kind of part of it.
It's

Adam (01:07:53):
part of the, like, there is like a macroeconomics lesson in this,
or I guess it's my, I don't know.
But there's like an economics lesson inthis episode of, like, a transaction,
and then we get Ray trying to explainartificial scarcity to Allie, and then
she shoots back with some real monetarypolicy critique of, these are just
pieces of paper with a picture on them.

(01:08:14):
And she's like, likemoney, and Ray's like, Oh,

Mike (01:08:18):
those are

Alex (01:08:19):
important pieces of paper.
Ali's trade reminds me of a real lifetrade I did when I was in middle school.
And this story will make Adam feelnothing, but Mike will physically cringe.
Um, I traded away my copy of PokemonLeaf Green for a Game Boy trading cable.
A what?

(01:08:40):
Just like a cable thatallows, that connects two
Game Boys to trade each other.

Mike (01:08:43):
Alex, what the hell?
Why?
The

Alex (01:08:45):
value of both of those items today.
Pokemon Leaf Green, if you'relucky you can get it for like 130.
Wow.
The trading cable, six bucks.

Mike (01:08:57):
Damn.
I just care about itfor nostalgia purposes.
That's, that's awful.

Alex (01:09:02):
I have since, uh, reclaimed Leafgreen and own
it, but, uh, Did it cost you

Mike (01:09:07):
130?

Alex (01:09:08):
No, I actually got it, I got it in a two pack of a FireRed and
a Leafgreen, I paid 200 for it.

Adam (01:09:14):
This was years ago.
You didn't hunt down the kid youmade this trade with and kill him?

Alex (01:09:18):
No, we're cool, we're cool.
It was my idea, I wanted it.
Um, you know, I have noill will against him.
I remember him, he was a cool guy.
Remember him fondly.
Yeah, he, he, we're fond, we're cool.
We haven't talked in liketen years, we're cool.

Adam (01:09:36):
We go back to the house, right?
The fellas, Ray, Robert,and Frank watching the game.
Uh, and then Frank explains, uh,no, these hack and sack cards.
Kids love that card crap.
Ray was all loopy about Batman cards.
Frank used them for table stabilization.
And then it rained, andthe cards got ruined.

(01:09:59):
And Ray, just looking betrayed,not sad, not crying, but
betrayed, tore his heart out.

Alex (01:10:05):
Okay, I, I kinda got that though, because I feel like if,
if my family did that with myPokemon cards, I, I wouldn't cry.
I would just feel betrayed.

Adam (01:10:15):
They devalued something that was very

Alex (01:10:17):
important to you.

Mike (01:10:19):
Mm

Alex (01:10:20):
hmm.
Absolutely.
Um, yeah.
Also, I want to point out, it's thenext little part of this scene, but
Marie coming in, and just knowingeverything about Hackidu is like, yes, my
grandparents were the same fucking way.

Adam (01:10:33):
Her deadpan delivery of it is the funniest part of the episode.

Alex (01:10:37):
Yeah.

Adam (01:10:38):
And the grandma, I have this in candy.
Scramasaur is the fastest
creature on Hackidu Mountain.
He starts off his slug a wog, and then he gets the sonic
crystal, and yeah, just hilarious.
It's the best part ofthis episode, I think.
Yeah,

Alex (01:10:51):
absolutely.

Adam (01:10:53):
Um Oh, and Frank talking about Ray's Batman cards.
It's the one thing I did wrong.
And then Robert saying, What about thetime you ran over my foot with the car?
I don't remember that.
Great.

Mike (01:11:08):
Awesome.
I love it.

Adam (01:11:10):
Well, we did, this is the work of the North Koreans.
So, Uh, Frank, everyone kind of realizesthat Parker took him for a ride.
Satchmo, this is business, 65 worth.
Um, and so Ray goes andstorms off to confront Parker.
I wasn't sure when he goes backto the gym, is this the same day?

(01:11:32):
Like, did he just leave thecave and Parker was like
working in there all night?

Mike (01:11:37):
My assumption is yes, because when he arrives back home, it's raining.
And both times I believehe gets back home.

Adam (01:11:45):
In the first scene?

Mike (01:11:46):
No, wait, actually you're right, because when
Marie comes in, she's not wet.
I think it is My interpretationwas that this all happens over the
course of one Afternoon evening.

Adam (01:11:58):
Okay,

Mike (01:11:59):
but maybe I'm wrong.

Adam (01:12:00):
It makes sense.
But anyway, Parker's still at the gymOh, Ray, you know says your boyfriend
referring to Parker to Debra Yourboyfriend is not as great as you think
he is or whatever and obviously that'sfunny because they're married in real
life and then Robert after Ray leaves ifDebra is Fucking Parker Robert says this

(01:12:23):
could explain why all the kids are blonde.
Ha ha ha ha Debra And smart.
Ha ha ha ha.
Pretty fun.
Yeah, it was good.
And those were good,

Mike (01:12:33):
good one too.
Yeah.
Good one too.

Adam (01:12:36):
Ray tries to negotiate with Parker.
It's okay.
If your boy wants to tradeback, Parker doesn't bite.
Tries to play the grandma card,which I thought was funny.
When Parker is like, everyoneknows you hate your mother.
Um, Ray offers to buy it.
And Parker asked for a hundred dollars,uh, confirming the theory that Parker

(01:12:57):
knew all along the card was valuable.
Uh, Ray's little meltdown at the endof this scene where he's, Parker leaves
and he's like pointing after him, he'slike Looking at all the other parents.
There's your king.
There's your king.
Long live the king.
And then he tries to organize a walkout.

Mike (01:13:16):
He tries to unionize them.
I loved it.
Let's go!
Tries and desperately fails

Alex (01:13:23):
to unionize them.
It's great.
It's great.
Because no one else gives a shit.
And honestly, I don'tthink, um What's his name?
The other dad did anything too wrong,like, he saw, he saw that the, the card
his kid was giving up was pretty valuableand he was like, hey, let's stop this.
I

Mike (01:13:41):
mean, I, I mean, I'm opposed to him stepping in in the first
place for the same reason Iwas opposed to Ray stepping in.
You gotta let the kidsmake their own mistakes.
If they're upset, then that'sa lesson in and of itself.
Parents don't need to getinvolved with that kid crap.
Um, that being said.
I would say,

Adam (01:13:57):
unless the Kid like feels like they were taken advantage of
and wants the parent to intervene,but yeah You shouldn't be right
especially with you know, Ray havingno familiarity with these cards Like
you don't need to get involved justto basically did it to impress Parker.
So yeah,

Mike (01:14:16):
right So I was opposed to him stepping in the first place after
that He's entirely right to say totell Ray to go play with himself.
So I'm yeah

Adam (01:14:27):
Uh, hi on Hacky Do Mountain where the flames shoot forth in the night.
This is a good song.

Alex (01:14:33):
It actually was very, it, it pretty catchy.
Almost not as good as like Pokemon, like

Adam (01:14:37):
Pokemon song.
Gotta catch 'em all.
Pokemon, uh, hacked Do song UncreditedMusic by Rick Marada, who is the like
composer for the show, uh, lyricsby Steve Stroven and Lou Schneider.
Two writers on the show.
Not bad.
Pretty good song.

Alex (01:14:54):
I like it.

Adam (01:14:55):
Um.
Robert on the couch with the kids
watching Hackidu.
Uh, they
jump on him, and he references his bull injury.
Man, this bull injury is a solid pieceof continuity for Robert's character.
Like, it's like his main charactertrait now, instead of the chin thing.
It really is.
That he's got a hole in his ass.
Upper thigh hole.
Made me, made me laugh.

(01:15:15):
That's a thinker.
It's pretty good.

Mike (01:15:17):
Dad says it's a high knee.
I like that.

Adam (01:15:20):
Um, tells Allie he couldn't get the card back.
And she didn't, she doesn't cry.
She just looks betrayed.
And then Ray and Debraare arguing about this.
And then Robert shuts him down.
By pointing Ray to Russell'sComic Shop in Hohokus, New Jersey.
Which I'm familiar with as a signthat I have driven past on my way
through New Jersey up to New York'sbeautiful, scenic Hudson Valley.

(01:15:44):
Um, before that, sorry, he wentand looked for the Scramasaur
card at a bunch of stores.
Couldn't get it.
Brought Ali back a pencilwith a troll on it.
Now, I feel like I've, I sawthose growing up occasionally.
I feel like those were there.

Mike (01:16:02):
I gotta, I gotta be honest.
When he did the thing where heput it in his paws and spun it,
that was, that was delightful.
I don't know, that mademe, that made me chuckle.
I would have loved that as a kid.

Adam (01:16:11):
She's not impressed by it.
I wonder why he didn't getother Hackidu cards though.
Like, I don't know.
He

Mike (01:16:18):
said he wasn't able to.
He said that they weren't selling them.
They weren't selling

Adam (01:16:21):
any of them?

Mike (01:16:23):
Yeah, that's what, that's what the line said.
I don't know if I didn't miss

Adam (01:16:25):
that.
Anyway.
I mean, hey, you never know.
So then we get Ray going up to Allie'sroom explaining artificial scarcity.
Uh, she says that she doesn'twant Scramasaur because it's rare.
It's because it's her favorite.
She loves him.
This was very touching.

Mike (01:16:41):
Yeah, no, it was, yeah, it was cute.
It was very cute.
And just to watch across Ray's faceand go, Oh, she's not trying to scare
trying to do a get rich quick scheme.
This is just Her being an innocentchild is, is kinda, yeah, I like that.
Especially as the realizationcrosses his face of like, Ah,
crap, I gotta go to Hocus.

(01:17:01):
That's been 65.

Adam (01:17:03):
He thinks only 65.
Russell's Vintage Comics, okay, Clarence,this guy in the trench coat, uncredited.
Think he might be one of our writers?
I don't know, I didn't recognize him.
But, um, he hurriedly leaves,as if he was, I don't know,
buying pornography or something.
We'll talk about that in a second.
Um, Ray goes up to the counter,says, I'm looking for Russell,

(01:17:26):
I'm Robert's brother, get out.
He hates Robert.
Uh, Ray.
Funny.
I liked Ray.
Robert and I were not really that close.
Um, and then Russell goes on this,uh, whole monologue about Robert
needing to love himself, needingto learn how to love himself.
Liked Ray's response to that.
You're right.
That's the greatest love of all.
And then

Alex (01:17:47):
I feel like they just read fan letters about how they
handled Robert and Amy's breakup.
Yeah.

Adam (01:17:52):
So obviously Russell hates Robert because he and Amy broke up.
He is under the impressionthat Robert dumped Amy.
Ray is under the opposite impression.
I thought his line Of, to Ray, afterhe starts kind of agreeing with
him about what a loser Robert is.
Amy should be with you.

(01:18:12):
And then Ray's response, don'tthink I haven't thought of that.
Very interesting.
I thought

Mike (01:18:17):
it was, I thought the reaction to the reaction was very funny.
Of uh, Russell going like, yeah, wait.
I don't know, that mademe, that made me chuckle.
That was good.
I uh, yeah, I really liked.
I, I loved the, I love this Russellcharacter and I know we're going to
talk about his replacement eventuallywith Chris Elliott, but, um, this,

(01:18:38):
this interaction was a lot of fun.
I really, uh, I also liked, we didn'ttouch on it, but the physical comedy
of Ray screwing up the umbrella on hisway into the store was really great.
Big

Adam (01:18:51):
umbrella struggle.
Very funny.
And then, what does he say?
He says like, stupid NewJersey or something like that?
Or stupid ho hocus?
I don't know.
Um, yeah.
Yeah.
Very funny.
Physical comedy.
Um, Russell says Hackidu is evil, nosubstance, no truth, kiddie crack.
Ray says I need 65 worth.

(01:19:11):
Um, Russell diverts him to Little Lotta.
I don't know if you're familiarwith Little Lotta outside of this.
Is that a real

Mike (01:19:19):
thing?
Yep.
Oh, I didn't know that.
So is she actually morbidlyobese or is that an exaggeration?
That's an

Adam (01:19:25):
exaggeration.
Lotta's a little girlwith a bow on her head.
And although she's morbidlyobese, she still finds happiness.
His delivery of that wasvery funny, I thought.
It was very funny.
And then Ray, do you havea partner I could talk to?
Um, followed by the question,Do you have a daughter?
And the response, I have a snake.
I have a snake.
That's not

Alex (01:19:45):
morbidly obese.
She's not morbidly obese.
Uh oh, going into the fan art.
Oh no no no!

Adam (01:19:52):
Oh no no no no

Alex (01:19:54):
no!
Oh no no no!
Oh no no no no no!
Alright, that's enough.

Adam (01:20:00):
Ray buys some comics to appease Russell and get him
to sell him the Scramasaur.
And I thought it was very funny thatRussell takes out the briefcase,
opens it, and then turns it ever soslightly to prevent Ray from seeing
the interior of the briefcase.
That is such a funny,small, physical choice.

(01:20:22):
Um, and then he charges Ray 289.
50 and one smile for the card.
That would be 537.
18 and 1.
86 smiles today.

Mike (01:20:35):
So much money.

Adam (01:20:36):
Adjusted for it.
That is so much so much smile so much.
I don't even know how I would do 0.
86 of a smile

Mike (01:20:44):
like that Yeah, it looks like 0.
86 of a smile.

Adam (01:20:47):
You could interpret it as either like Two smiles is the degree of smiling,
like you're smiling double the likeintensity or you could look at it as like
a partial, like two smiles, one regularsmile followed by a discreet, like partial
smile with only a portion of your mouth.

(01:21:09):
Helpful?
Unhelpful?
I don't know.
Helpful.
Ray, uh, yeah, so Ray getsthe card from Russell.
Now let's talk about and the controversy.
Let's teach the controversy.
Um, Paul Rubens, Paul Rubens, who'sbest known for playing Peewee Herman
is, uh, plays Russell in this episode.

(01:21:31):
And you may know if you have spent anytime in the, everybody loves Raymond
subreddit or Other fan communities that,uh, he was replaced, and this gets posted
as if it's new information every week.
Uh, he was replaced by Chris Elliott,uh, in Season 7 when Amy's family were

(01:21:52):
introduced as regulars on the show.
Now, there is a piece ofmisinformation, or maybe hyperbole,
that I would like to correct.
Myth.

Mike (01:22:04):
Myth.

Adam (01:22:05):
So, the IMDB trivia, and many people, the people who week after
week comment on the post in theEverybody Loves Raymond subreddit as
if it's new information, everybodysays something to the effect of Ray
Romano demanded that Paul Reubens befired from the cast of Everybody Loves
Raymond, or Ray would quit the show.

(01:22:29):
Background, Paul Reubens, of course,is famous for two things, playing
Pee Wee Herman and jacking it.
In a adult porn theater, adultporn, in a porn theater, well
this is a necessary distinction,in an adult porn theater in 1991.
So everybody knows about that one.
But he was also arrested in 2002.

(01:22:52):
on charges of possessionof child pornography.
Now this is a weird situation,but you can see why.
Now here comes Adam to defend him.
I'm not about to defend him.
I'm going to share with you howPaul Rubens justified his actions.
It's a weird situation because PaulReubens claims that one of his hobbies

(01:23:13):
is collecting vintage nude photos, okay?
Which he buys in bulk.
Would buy in bulk.
He's no longer with us.
He apparently had 70, 000 images.
Nude images in various media.
And, uh, according to him, because hebought this stuff in bulk, he had no
way of knowing what everything was.

(01:23:34):
So that's the excuse.
Uh, that there might have been somequestionable stuff slipped in there.
But.
In any case, the child pornographycharge was dropped, he pleaded
guilty to misdemeanor obscenity.
Um, he, his claim is that he wascollecting erotica, muscle magazines,
and a sizable collection, quote,a sizable collection of mostly

(01:23:56):
homosexual vintage erotica, such asphotographic studies of teen nudes.
It's weird, for sure.
No,

Mike (01:24:03):
that, okay, so I'm just gonna say, um, I'm sorry, sorry to tell
you this, Adam, I know, I'm not, I'mgonna cut you off before we get to
your opinions on Woody Allen, butI, I just gotta say Did any of that

Adam (01:24:15):
sound like I was defending him?
Mm, I don't know.
Of course not.
I

Mike (01:24:18):
don't know.
Uh, you get, you put somevery legalese in there.
I'm gonna say Uh, to anyonelistening here, general word of
advice, don't buy your porn in bulk.

Adam (01:24:29):
That is a good lesson from this.
Don't And also Always, if you'rebuying pornography, catalog it.
Make sure you have a completeinventory of what you're buying.
Gotta

Mike (01:24:42):
catch em all.

Adam (01:24:44):
That is kind of his approach, I guess.
Yeah.
If he wants to catch all the Catch em all.
18

Mike (01:24:49):
plus.

Adam (01:24:49):
Yes.

Mike (01:24:50):
18, 18 plus specifically.
Yeah.
I don't think that anybody is going to buythe idea of, no, I was just academically
interested in those teen nude photographs.
He

Adam (01:25:03):
considered them art.
Um,

Mike (01:25:05):
bullshit.
I don't know.
Very

Adam (01:25:07):
weird.
But Yeah.
Anyway, so this happens, right?
And uh, you know, the news breaks in 2002.
Now this episode aired in 2000.
This is the only episodethat Paul Rubins appears on.
So when they were writing seasonseven in 2002 and planning to

(01:25:30):
introduce Amy's family as regularson the show, they clearly.
Given the news about what was goingon in his life, decided not to
bring Paul Reubens back and replacehim with Chris Elliott as Peter.
Now, the reason I bring this up isI've seen this blown into this mythic

(01:25:51):
tale about Ray taking Ray Romanotaking this principled stand, laying
it all on the line, I'll quit theshow, I'll take the whole with me.
There's no way we're havingPaul Rubens back on the show.
One guy on the subreddit claimedPhil Rosenthal did an interview where

(01:26:13):
he said that Ray was the maddesthe's ever seen him in his life.
That interview is nowhere to be found.
I, I have so much trouble believing that.
It's clearly, they made a logicaldecision of, Oh wow, I guess Paul's
a creep, let's not invite him back.
It's not like he was, like, I,I don't imagine there was a huge

(01:26:33):
controversy in the EverybodyLoves Raymond production office.
So

Mike (01:26:38):
we, so we discussed this prior to the show.
I think we reached the more likely thingwas, first of all, he was, Paul Rubens
was not a regular employee of the show.
They would have had to rehire him andthe higher ups of the show, which at
this time would have included Ray Romano,

Adam (01:26:58):
um,

Mike (01:26:58):
made the wise decision.
To, Hey, let's not endorse this,this, let's avoid the controversy.
Uh, this deviant Yeah.
Mm-hmm . And, uh, let's, let's, uh, yeah.
So I don't doubt that Ray wasprobably on the side of, Hey,
yeah, let's not bring him back.
Uh, I just, what we discussed is nota hundred percent sure that it was.

(01:27:21):
Uh, him, Ray Romano, putting on a shiuh, uh, shining armor, standing on the
back of a horse and gallivanting tothe, uh, to the, yeah, we got a fire.
The guy, I don't

Adam (01:27:30):
picture him slamming his hand on the table in front of all
the CBS executives saying eitherwe fire Paul Rubins or I walk.
I, none of that happened.

Mike (01:27:43):
To be clear might have happened.
We, we don't know for sure.
Sure, it might have happened, but.
But it's, it's not the factthat it's being repeated as.

Adam (01:27:50):
And also, if you think about it logically, who
would he be arguing against?
Right, like, unless Who's saying

Alex (01:27:56):
we should bring him back?
Yeah.
Right, unless it's I think everyonewas just in agreement right away.
Everybody was like, oh, thatguy His brother, Jeffrey

Mike (01:28:00):
Rubens.
I don't know if he's got a brother,Jeffrey, I'm making that up.
But unless there's like a relative, Ican't imagine there were many people
that were Paul peewee apologists.

Adam (01:28:10):
I don't know, but I, I've, I am on the side of the five people
who mark that as unhelpful on IMDB.
Not because it's not necessarilytrue, but because it perpetuates a
harmful myth about the heroism of Rey.
It's stolen valor is what it is.

Mike (01:28:29):
We, we, we here at everybody, uh, sorry, at the Barone Zone, every, we
here at the Barone Zone want to standagainst Rey being marked as a hero.
I'm, I'm, just for the record,by all accounts, Rey Romano seems
to be a perfectly pleasant guy.
He seems to be very, heseems to be very nice.
On the right side of all issues, yes.
Yeah, yeah, we're not saying, we'renot saying anything bad about him,

(01:28:49):
this is for the bit, but yeah, just,just clearing up the controversy.

Adam (01:28:53):
Yes, clearing up, teaching the controversy, if you disagree
with us, and you have, if you haveproof, I would love to see it.
I will happily admit I'm wrongif you provide proof, write
to us at Raymond at postfund.
org.
Anyway, that's my soapbox, tryingto inject a little, like, I know

(01:29:14):
you've been holding that one in, bud.
It's, it's, controversy sells.
Anything you guys want tosay about this episode?

Mike (01:29:19):
I liked the conclusion.
I liked the final scene where he bringsit back and Allie gets the smile.
And, uh, Robert's lineof, um, Oh, what was it?
A little girl's smile.
How can you put a price on that?
289. 50. That was great.
Uh, I liked that Allieimmediately folded it.
That was also really funny.

Alex (01:29:39):
That, that hurt my soul.
Yeah.

Mike (01:29:42):
Um, but in general, this was a very good episode.
I want to say What the hellis Robert talking about?
He vouches for Russell as a quotegood guy twice I don't know if we
even putting aside that he's Pee weeHerman I I don't think that I got the
impression that Russell was a great guy I

Alex (01:29:59):
don't I don't think Robert's spoken to him since he and Amy broke
up Yeah, and maybe if I had to guess

Adam (01:30:05):
who knows what their relationship and interactions have been Oh, yeah,
Robert looking at the comics thatRay bought Look at this little lotto.
Look how fat she is.
Ha ha ha ha.
I feel like that could have been ameta I'm giving them the benefit of
the doubt that was a meta joke, like,Why would anybody think this was funny?
Like, that's not a comedy premise.

(01:30:27):
So I'm I'm interpreting it as that.
But anyway.
Okay, cool.

Alex (01:30:34):
Anything else, Alex?
The fact that, uh, Russell did nothave that card in a card saver.
I just think it's the exact same thing.
No,

Mike (01:30:43):
my thought was, Oh my God, it's pouring rain outside.

Alex (01:30:47):
How is,

Mike (01:30:48):
it's raining outside.
How the hell is Ray gonna get thatto the card without it being wet?
I, I was so worried.

Alex (01:30:55):
I mean, look, it was the 90s, I get it.
It just, you know, the seriesjust dropped, but like, hey,
it's why they're valuable today.
Bunch of stupid kids not takingcare of them, including myself.
And Mike and parents and, uh, and parents.

Adam (01:31:12):
Okay, let's turn our attention to our classic barometer, it's our rating
scale from 1 to 10, on which we rate Ray'sperformance as a husband, son, brother,
father, hacky doo trainer, um, with 10being the best dads of sitcom history,
your Danny Tanners and Uncle Phils, and1 being the men who actively harm their

(01:31:32):
families, Don Draper, Walter White.
Alex, where is Ray comingin for you this episode?

Alex (01:31:41):
Uh, Ray, you know, frankly, I'm not that pissed at Ray this time,
frankly, um, Ray, I mean, look, hedid step in for the kid trade, but you
know, he was standing up for his kid.
He thought she was getting a bad rap.
He probably bought her those cards.
So to see her, like, throw them all awayfor, like, one without understanding, you

(01:32:04):
know, the, you know, intrepid value, oreven that just she wanted that one a lot.
Um, you know, I see the good in him.
I feel like he should havetalked to her about it.
Like, hey, are you sure?
You know, you're givingaway a lot for one.
And then she would have said, yeah, thisis my favorite, and I've been wanting it.
And then that would have been it.

(01:32:25):
And then probably the other kid'sdad would have stepped in, and we
would have had a different problem.
Um, And Ray really did try to, you know,fix it, and I don't think there was
anything wrong with him, you know, doingthings in the order that he did, like
trying to just say Ali will get overit, uh, then kind of going to talk to
the other dad, and then only when kindof all his chips were against the wall.

(01:32:49):
He took the drive to New Jersey.
I don't know, I can't sayI would have done that.
Like, you know, I'm not a dad.
But like you won't step foot in NewJersey driving anyone like like that
night driving through in the rain Yes,that's pretty that's a good dad Gotta go

Adam (01:33:07):
through the city gotta go through Brooklyn and Queens gotta
go across Staten Island like yeah

Alex (01:33:13):
shot he spent like Half a grand by today's standards on that stuff.
That's true.
That he didn't want.
Um, So I feel like Ican't be too mean to him.
He did good.
He really, like, it showed how muchhe cares about Allie just being happy.
Um, And you know, Uh, for themistakes he made, I'll take off
a little bit, but I think a sevenand a half is, is appropriate.

(01:33:36):
Cool.

Mike (01:33:37):
Mike.
I'm in the same vein.
Uh, he did really bad atthe top of the episode.
He, uh, disrespected.
Tepra a lot, uh, at the, uh,during the, he was not helpful
during the charity carnival thing.
Um, yeah, I mean, yeah, he didn't dothe best when he was trying to negotiate
the trade between Allie and Tyler, buthey, like, he doesn't know this crap.

(01:34:00):
Yeah, it wasn't perfect, but I'm notgonna knock him too much for that.
But all the harm that he causedHe undid and, and I think
that that really says a lot.
Um, so yeah, I was, I was happy with, withhim for the same reasons that Alex said.
He went out of his way, he went toa bunch of different toy stores, he
tried to negotiate and made a foolof himself back at the carnival.

(01:34:20):
He drove all the way out toNahucus and dealt with a terrible,
terrible experience and spent 289.
50 on this stupid freaking card.
Uh, I'm gonna give him a7, cause same, same idea.
He took, went out of his way.
main memories that Ithink Ali will remember.

Adam (01:34:39):
I am in the same neighborhood.
I definitely want to take off alittle bit for his, his behavior
towards Deborah throughout theepisode is a little questionable.
Obviously, the sort of performativetoxic masculinity at the carnival.
Um, and just kind of being a dick toher even before Parker's on the scene.

(01:35:00):
And then the bickering and the arguingin each of the living room scenes.
Um, I think Debra's in theright, and I think he realizes
eventually that she's in the right.
But, uh, yeah, I don'tknow, that troubles me.
He did go above and beyond forAllie, driving to New Jersey in the
rain, um, spending almost 500, likeover 500 by today's standards, is a

(01:35:25):
significant amount of money for sometrash comics and a little paper card,
um, just to make his daughter happy.
I think, yeah, he goes through each ofthe steps, he tries to resolve it with
Parker, I kind of want to give him pointsfor his attempt to unionize the parents.

(01:35:46):
I think that was That showsgood like moral center.
Um, even if he was uh, Doingit for the wrong reasons.
I think if you if you can join a union youprobably should that's just my opinion um
I feel like uh, I don't want to devaluehow he treated deborah too much, but

(01:36:07):
my first instinct is eight um I thinki'll go seven point Five actually same
as Alex just because I don't I yeah, itreally troubled me how he treated Deborah

Mike (01:36:21):
Okay, well that will land us at an average of a seven
point three for this episode.

Adam (01:36:26):
Okay, pretty good.
Pretty good Now there's only onelast thing to do, you know, we like
to end these episodes with somethinginspirational with something moving
with something that You know, justlike a load of inspiration, joy.
Yes.
A load of joy for our listeners, somethingto make them happy, something to fill

(01:36:52):
them up, uh, as they go into their week.
Uh, I think what we'll do guys.
And I know this is new, is I think we'llkind of A, B this, and we'll have Alex
kind of say something inspirational, andthen Michael say something inspirational,
and then I think, whichever oneresonates more, comes across as more

(01:37:15):
inspirational, I think we'll use thatone, but, um, yeah, so Alex, Alex.
Is there anything inspiring that youwant to pass on to the listener this
week, maybe something religious,maybe something, uh, you know,
more secular even, something aboutnature, or, or anything like that,
that, you know, can really motivatepeople to, to have a great week?

Alex (01:37:41):
Okay.
I'm gonna give this one more real try.

Mike (01:37:47):
Yeah, no, great.

Alex (01:37:49):
I don't know what you mean by that, but go, go ahead.
I saw a quote the other day that Ireally liked to remind people about
how important it is to take careof not only others, but yourself.
The quoting question is, Don'tset yourself on fire trying
to keep other people warm.

Mike (01:38:10):
Oh, you know, that's very

Adam (01:38:11):
sweet.
I like that.
That's pretty good.
Yeah, that's a little funny.
It's like, yeah.
No, that's good.
Okay.
That one's good.
We got that clean.
Okay.
Mike, do you have anything inspirationalthat you would like to leave the
listener with moving into this next week?

Mike (01:38:25):
Yeah.
You know what?
Actually, I do.
I, um.
You.
I, I, I know you guys know I,I'm a big fan of Hollywood.
Of course.
Just had the Oscars.
Yes.
You know what really inspired me?
Really?
Hollywood, really Hollywood's

Adam (01:38:36):
big night.
Really?

Mike (01:38:37):
Hollywood's big night.
What really, really took me backwas actually, um, Adrian Brody.
Yes.
I don't know if you guys saw, he, uh, seta new world record for the longest in Yes.
And Oscar's history.
Yeah.
Guinness.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
For 5 minutes and 31 seconds, we justlistened to this man talk about how, how
hard it is to be a, uh, an actor, andhow to, and, and, and all this stuff,

(01:38:59):
and man, he overcame so much, so I'djust like to read a little snippet from
this 5 minute and 31 second speech.
Sure, go ahead, please do.
So he, this is actually just right fromthe beginning, so he gets on stage, he
says, they're already counting me down.
Okay.
Thank you, God.
Thank you for this blessed life.
If I may just humbly begin by givingthanks for the tremendous outpouring of

(01:39:23):
love that I felt from this world, andfrom every individual that has treated
me with respect and appreciation,I am, I am, I feel so fortunate.
And I feel the most fortunate forhaving discovered the Verona Sonus.
Which is a, what?
Which is a Pay one time what youwant to achieve a lifetime access

(01:39:46):
to a One episode a month extra ofthe Barone boys every single month.
You can sign up at the link in thedescription He said thank you all so much.
Thank you so much.
Yeah I wasn't sure whathe was talking about.
But yeah, he was saying that yeah

Adam (01:40:03):
I mean, we have gotten the bump.
We've gotten the Brody bump.
I mean, he mentioned the Baruchvoice in his Oxford speech.
He did.
Yeah.
So to be fair,

Mike (01:40:14):
most people did tune out as of minute, like, uh, as of
second, like 35, but you know,

Adam (01:40:21):
there was

Mike (01:40:21):
five minutes of good content in there.
About four and a half minutes of that wasjust him ranting about the Baroness Zonis.
He has a lot of

Adam (01:40:28):
thoughts on our scruples episodes.
He's like, these guys spendtoo much time playing scruples.
It's not really anything like asubstance, but he liked our episode about
somewhere, uh, welcome to Mooseport.
He liked our episodeabout somewhere in Queens.
Like that's kind of what we do is on theBaroness Zonis, little themed episodes.

(01:40:48):
Interact with other stuff,uh, in the Raymond universe.
So movies or TV shows thatthe cast has appeared in.
Um, and we'll play fun games.
Like, uh, we did a celebrityJeopardy based on Ray's episode.
We did, um, who wants to be a,who wants to be a Marillionaire?
I don't know if you remember that, Mike.
Oh, I do.
I did.
That was a problem.

Mike (01:41:08):
I

Adam (01:41:09):
know a lot of great stuff at the baroness zonus, you
know, which is that post fund.
org slash donate.
Um, you know, yeah, or thatMike, Alex, honestly, I mean,
just this just this time, I

Mike (01:41:27):
mean,

Adam (01:41:28):
can you blame just this time?
Like it's pretty, can you blame?
Would you blame me if I just, I mean,we got to acknowledge the Brody thing.
Would you blame me if I just use micsjust this week, just this week, I'll use
mics and then next time I'll use yours.
Is that, I mean, is that okay with you?
I mean, you understand, right?

(01:41:49):
Obviously it makes sense.

Alex (01:41:50):
I'm gonna shit en rage,
. Adam: Okay, then we gotta, we gotta go.
Yeah, we gotta clear out.
We gotta clear out here.
We gotta clear out because he'salready trembling and I don't think
he's gonna make it to the bathroom.
Okay, , that's it for us.
Thank you so much forlistening to the Barone Zone.
We will see you next timeto talk about season fours.
So.
Um, but until then, there'sonly one last thing to say.

(01:42:13):
It's our classic sign off.
Everybody loves
Raymond.
And we love you.
It's not stopping.