Turning 40 and Finding Peace Without Answers

Shā Sparks’ midlife transformation was about breaking free—from toxic relationships, self-doubt, and the need for closure. After years in an abusive relationship, she realized she didn’t need answers or closure to heal—she just needed to walk away. Letting go of the “why” allowed her to move forward and build a life rooted in self-worth rather than past wounds. A big part of that journey was changing her self-talk—shifting from harsh self-judgment to a more compassionate view. Now, in her 40s, she’s thriving. Her story is a reminder that healing isn’t about understanding the past—it’s about reclaiming your future.

Guest Bio 

As the CEO (Chief Excitement Officer) of Sparks of Fire International, Shā hosts her signature podcast, The Shā Sparks Show and is co-host of UnderWired podcast. She is also a Master Practitioner of NLP, Hypnosis, Reiki, Mental and Emotional Release, a Certified Fearless Living Coach and Trainer, the author of How to Get Your Voice Back, and the Co-Founder of the FIRESTARTERS Project.

Turning 40 and Finding Peace Without Answers

At 16, Shā Sparks found herself at rock bottom—arrested for a DUI and facing the reality of a life shaped by addiction, abuse, and deep emotional wounds. But that moment of humiliation was also the spark that ignited her journey toward healing. In this episode, she shares her incredible story of resilience, the power of breaking cycles, and how she found real love—not just in others, but within herself.

Episode Highlights:

• The defining moment at 16 that changed the trajectory of Sha’s life.
• How childhood trauma shaped her early years and led to self-destructive habits.
• The pivotal decision to quit drinking at 25—and the surprising catalyst behind it.
• What kept her stuck in an abusive relationship for 12 years, and what finally set her free.
• How journaling and gratitude helped her regain control over her life.
• The profound realization that changed her understanding of love and relationships.
• Why she believes healing starts with the way we speak to ourselves.

Shā’s story reminds us that healing isn’t about understanding why bad things happened—it’s about learning to let go and move forward. If you’re struggling to break free from patterns that no longer serve you, this conversation may be the push you need to start rewriting your story.

If you enjoyed this episode, please take a moment to rate, follow, and review The Big Four Oh Podcast! Your support helps us continue bringing you inspiring conversations like this one. 🎙✨

Guest Resources

Shā’s Gift To TBFO Listeners: Complimentary Release Your Addiction Meditation

Connect with Shā on Facebook

Connect with Shā on Instagram 

Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend – A must-read for anyone struggling to set healthy limits in relationships.

Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood – A book that sheds light on how childhood experiences influence our adult relationships.

Do you have the Midlife Ick? 

Download Stephanie’s guide to the Ick to diagnose whether you or someone you love is suffering from this insidious midlife malaise. www.thebigfouroh.com/ick

Connect

TheBigFourOh.com

TBFO on Instagram