June 18, 2025 • 55 mins
What happens when a professional musician suddenly can't play? In this deeply reflective conversation, saxophonist Scott Box joins Dom Lamore to explore the unexpected journey of his recent hand injury and the profound questions it's raised about identity, purpose, and faith.
Scott shares his raw emotional response to being sidelined from performing – the initial depression, the frustration of everyday tasks taking twice as long, and the struggle to find meaning in forced stillness. Yet within this challenge, new perspectives emerge: "Praise God, it gave me an appreciation for having two working limbs... Maybe I need to sit down for a minute and just relax. I've spent more time with my wife already. That's a beautiful thing."
The conversation flows naturally into exploring the demanding lifestyle of professional musicians – late nights, weekend work, and the physical toll of performance. Both men discuss how they prepare their bodies and minds for shows, revealing the athletic discipline required behind the scenes of creative work. Their candid exchange about wedding band dynamics highlights the crucial importance of camaraderie: "That's one of the best hangs in a band that I've ever had. Ever."
Perhaps most compelling is Scott's reflection on his conversion to Islam and the tension it created with his musical career. He thoughtfully questions whether music truly serves a spiritual purpose or merely provides entertainment and dopamine rushes. "We talk about how music brings people together," Scott observes, "but how does it bring people together? Because people coming together is still not a concrete concept." This leads to a fascinating examination of what makes something genuinely spiritual – the practical application rather than just the feeling it provides.
As the discussion deepens, both men share their evolving sense of purpose. For Scott, it's increasingly centered around family relationships rather than career achievements. For Dom, it's about creating opportunities that showcase other artists' talents. Their honest exploration of life's big questions offers listeners a rare window into the inner landscape of working artists wrestling with meaning, authenticity, and intentionality.
Ready to think more deeply about your own purpose and how you engage with the world? Subscribe now, share with friends, and join the conversation about what really matters beyond the noise of everyday life.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
We talk about the good.
Can you separate the artistfrom the art?
And it's like sure you can dothat.
But then also, at the end ofthe day, what fruits did that
art itself actually produce thatwere beneficial to a community
of people?
Did that art indeed putpositive messages into a
community?
Did it feed a community ofpeople?
Did it cause a community ofpeople to come together and do
(00:23):
something positive?
In society, in american societyespecially?
We talk about how those thingshappen all the time.
Yeah, but we have to talk aboutit concretely and not just like
music brings people together,okay, but how does it bring
people together?
Because people coming togetheris still not a concrete concept.
They came together and did whatwe came together and brought
further along what ladies andgentlemen, and anyone else who
(00:53):
is here.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
My name is dom lamore and you are listening to the
black man talking emotionspodcast.
On today's episode, I speakwith my guy, scott Box, about
his recent hand injury.
Music, religion and so muchmore.
It does not matter how long youare spending on the earth, how
(01:27):
much money you have gathered orhow much attention you have
received.
It is about the amount ofpositive vibration you have
radiated in life that matters.
(01:53):
So I feel like we're in a uniqueplace right now because I feel
like the reason why we're ableto speak today and it was no
conflict or we didn't have tomess anything up it's because
you're injured and you're one ofthose people that you are
usually moving and grooving somuch that it's really hard to
kind of get you for one secondlike outside of work.
When I'm working, you'reworking with me, and then when
(02:14):
I'm at home, you're usuallyworking.
I want to start this kind of atwhere are you at mentally with
your injury?
As a saxophone player who needsyour fingers every day to work,
not being able to work playingthe instrument that I'm sure you
(02:38):
play every single day?
How has that affected you?
Are you okay?
Do you feel like it's beendifficult for you, or are you
actually enjoying a little bitof the be able to breathe a
little bit?
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Yeah, it's, it's.
It's difficult.
I can't stand not being able todo stuff.
I can't stand not being able towork.
I love to work, I love to play,I love to work.
The two have become one, in asense, in my life.
I was super depressed when itfirst happened.
It's not the first time I'vehad a debilitating injury that
kept me from being able to play.
For a few weeks.
I feel, you know, I'm like Ican't even wash a dish over here
(03:11):
.
Everything takes me twice aslong.
It is getting better.
It's not like I can't use thishand at all, but I have a
forefinger and a thumb, which isalso a beautiful thing.
Praise God, it gave me anappreciation for having two
working limbs.
I'll say that much At the endof the day, for me, everything
happens with a reason, with apurpose, and I'm still trying to
(03:31):
figure out what that is.
But maybe I need to sit downfor a minute and just relax.
I've spent more time with mywife already.
That's a beautiful thing.
Hopefully it's forcing me toslow down, to really take in
everything that I'm doing, topay attention to details more.
So I think these are thingsthat are important in life and I
like to go, go, go, go go.
So yeah, it's been difficult.
I'm really not enjoying it atall.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
I understood some of the struggles you have with us
gigging and the way that thewedding band really works and
how we're out and about and ittakes up so much of our lives,
even today.
Like I originally planned thisto be at two and we started at
around two.
But like if this was a normalweekend and I wasn't, well, not
normal.
If this was a weekend, I wasn'tworking, I would have been able
(04:25):
to do this as early as youwanted to and been good to go,
but since I worked last night,there's no way I was going to be
able to do it before oneo'clock.
You know, like there'sabsolutely no way.
I got home last night, Adriennehad headphones in her ears,
which all affects me.
Weird, because I usually comein and give her a big kiss and
say hi, and she's like I don'twant you to touch me.
I'm putting headphones onbecause I need a full night's
(04:52):
rest.
Leave me alone.
And I was like, well damn, I'mjust a piece of meat, walking in
the dark, getting dressed,brushing my teeth in the dark
and trying my best not to wakeher up.
And then I wake up in themorning to her being like I'm
leaving.
I was like, oh okay, and soit's just me at the house and
I'm not going to see her untiltonight and I'm going to be
cooking her dinner.
She's going to walk in the doorlike, oh, you're here and I'll
be like you left me Anyway.
(05:12):
But with that being said, it'sreally interesting seeing how
the band really affects my lifeon a regular basis.
It's part of my normal now.
It's part of what I prepare for.
I prep for I get myself right,I do my yoga and my breathing
exercises so that I can be readyto execute the performance but
(05:34):
then also recover from theperformance.
Last night was a particularlydifferent type of wedding.
We had about 300 guests whenwere y'all.
We were in Birmingham and theyhad us do a small dance set, so
we had a 20 minute dance set tostart and they had all the
lights up.
It was really bright.
Everyone was still sitting down.
(05:54):
No one was on the dance floorexcept for a couple of older
people got over to dance to AlGreen and then we took our break
.
I came back and you know I'mthe emcee, so I started out with
the speeches and got everybodytalking and up and about.
Then we got the band back onstage for 24K Magic, the first
song, usually, of the set.
Instead of singing it on stage,I did four laps around the room
(06:18):
getting people out of theirseats so that they would
actually go to the dance floorfor September.
You know what I'm saying and I'mlike literally running around
the entire venue Get up, get up,get up, get up.
Let's go From that start to theend.
I may have ran around that roomat least 13, 14 times, so I'm
more tired tonight than Inormally would be.
(06:39):
You know what I'm saying and itaffects me mentally, physically
, spiritually, and so to see howjust my body and how I am
affected and I'm still like,okay, we're doing this every
weekend.
I can only imagine someone whoyou know you started with the
band pretty much eight years ago.
(06:59):
Right, I did this hiddenblessing comes out where it's
like okay, I see you'restruggling, I see this is
something that you're doingbecause you do love it, but it's
hard and it's something that'sgoing against some of your
morals.
It's time for you to take abreak, and you're not going to
do it yourself, so I'm going todo it for you, kind of blessing.
I feel like I see it more assomething like oh man, I,
(07:23):
actually I get it now.
I see it more as something like, oh man, I, actually I get it
now.
I think that that would beincredible to have that time to
really get to sit back, reflectand kind of look forward to
what's going to be the next moveforward.
Are you seeing it in that way?
And I know you say you're stillnot enjoying it, but are you
finding those little moments oflike okay, yes, yes, this is
(07:43):
good.
I know it sucks, but this isgood.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
Yeah, I mean I'm forced to see it that way if I
want to have any positivity inmy life.
Yeah, because I am prone to bevery frustrated and get angry
very quickly, which is somethingthat I've worked past few years
and gotten better and better,better and, god willing, I'll
continue to get even better.
So in order for me to seethings in a positive light, I
(08:07):
had to see it that way.
And also, exactly what you justsaid mirrors what my wife has
said as well, so it's prettyevident.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but it's fire.
I mean just to kind of pivot towhat we do as musicians and
artists that travel with thecorporate band and then on top
of that we're producingdifferent projects outside of
that band, trying to keepourselves moving and working and
doing the music that we want todo outside of the corporate
(08:39):
stuff that we kind of have to doto make money.
To do to make money.
It's a lot.
It's constantly moving.
It's constantly you having tocome up with new approaches,
ideas.
How can you make your nextperformance more unique than the
last performance?
Yes, and it always starts froma place of I really love doing
(09:00):
this.
So to pivot to the music part,where was that moment for you
where you were like this is whatI love.
So I'm willing to endure a lotof this bullshit, to continue to
do it, because we all got tosay, okay, this is kind of
annoying, but I love this somuch, I'm going to do it.
Where did that start for you?
Speaker 1 (09:19):
When I was younger, my mentality about the whole
thing was because I am amusician, this gives me an
opportunity to put theinstrument to my face, so I'm
getting playing time, whichmeans I'm getting better.
I'm playing with othermusicians, which means I'm
getting experience.
I'm making money as a musician,which is freeing up my time to
(09:40):
be able to practice.
In the beginning, that's whatit was all about.
It was how much can I free upmy time so that I can spend time
on the instrument, whichcoincided with if I'm gigging,
I'm also spending time on theinstrument, yep.
However, at this point in thisparticular band for me it was I
really loved hanging out withy'all music.
(10:01):
It got to a point where themusic wasn't so much helping me
put time in on my instrument.
I've reached a point now whereI need different environments in
order to get better.
The camaraderie was beautifuland I have, in fact, missed it.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Understood, understood.
I was just talking to someonethe other day.
They were asking me about theband and they were like, how did
you get in it?
And I was telling them my storyabout like oh, I just randomly
met this guy and he was likeyou're good, I'm going to tell
this guy about you.
And then I was in the band.
But I spoke about just how oneof the biggest things Anthony
told me off of our first meetingtogether was I heard you were a
(10:38):
good hang.
That was his number one thing.
It's so important.
I heard you were a good hangand since that was like what we
needed we needed good hangs inthis band.
I didn't need to hear you sing,I just needed someone that I
know we could be in a van withfor seven hours there and back
and you wouldn't be like themost annoying person in the
(10:59):
world or you wouldn't be someonewho would like kill the vibe of
the entire band.
And I feel like when heapproached bringing people in
that way, that's what built thiscamaraderie, because you you
were in the band before me.
Ben jorge and vanessa and aliawere all in the band, so, like
you had seen it with the bandprevious, then you stopped, came
(11:23):
back after we were completedand we're a whole different band
now, so you got a side of bothof them.
So do you feel like you noticedthat?
Oh, we actually.
That that's what changed your,because once again, you left the
band because you're like, yeah,I can't do this anymore.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
and then you came back and then you were like, oh,
I could stick around becausethis is a good hang that's
exactly what happened yeah yeah,because in the initial band I
was friends with everybody and Idid enjoy it, but it was not
like it was when I came back.
When I came back and then I mety'all and then even to the
(12:00):
point of I actually had met vanVanessa and passed her name
along to Anthony.
And then, once we were alltogether for a few weeks, I
talked to Anthony the other weekand I was like man, that's one
of the best hangs in a band thatI've ever had.
Ever.
We have too much fun.
It's ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
For sure.
Like you said, it sucked nothaving you this weekend because
we were in Birmingham.
And when we go to Birmingham itsucked not having you this
weekend because we were inBirmingham.
And when we go to Birminghamit's always a different element
because Birmingham is kind ofdeveloped into in my mental.
That's like our band home, likewe play in Birmingham more than
we play anywhere else More thanAtlanta, unfortunately but it
(12:41):
is like it's a place that whenwe go, like I know exactly where
I want to go eat, I knowexactly how I want to operate in
the city, we know where we goplay pool, we know we know the
city so well because we arethere so much that it almost
feels like it's a, it's theoffice.
Hey, we're going to the officethis week.
We're not going to New Orleans,we're going to the office, you
(13:01):
know, kind of thing.
So I can see exactly whatyou're talking about.
That hang element this week wasa little different because last
week I spent so much money onthe restaurant that we went to
because we get this buyout andI'm thinking, all right, I'm
just gonna get this small thing.
But it wasn't happy hour thistime and I'm used to going to
this restaurant.
You know I'm used to goingthere during happy hours.
(13:21):
I'm used to spending half theamount of money and I spent like
40 and we only got like 36 forthe buyout.
Yeah, and I was like I spentmore than I got for food.
This week I'm going going toChipotle.
I'm spending $10.
I'm going back to the venue,I'm not drinking, I'm not doing
(13:41):
anything extra.
Ben heard me say that, andAaliyah heard me say that, and
Leslie heard me say that and waslike I'm riding with you,
dominique, because we didn'twant to spend all the money.
And luckily, weirdly, this weekwe got our tip with our check.
They tipped us before the gig,which was fire.
Oh, it was so fire.
So we were like oh, we can gospend a little money on food.
(14:04):
And then I was like nope, nope,nope, I'm going to Chipotle,
I'm spending $10.
I'm coming back to the venue.
And they were like cool, wedoing it too to the venue.
And they were like cool, wedoing it too.
And we came back, we ate, wedid a yoga session for 20
minutes, then everybody elsecame into the room and we got
ready for the gig.
So it was like I was like thisis exactly how I'm going to
approach this.
(14:24):
I can't emphasize enough to theaudience, the people who are
listening to this pod, just howimportant having those moments,
having that energy, is with theband, because all of us love
doing this.
That's not the problem.
Each one of us enjoy what we'redoing.
We're playing the same flippingplaylist we have played for
years Over and over.
We might add three or foursongs every other so often, but
(14:47):
it's the same playlist, but weenjoy it so much.
We wake up on Saturday and wedo it and we enjoy it and we try
our best to have the most funas possible.
If I don't like the people inthe band, if I'm constantly
dreading being around them, I'mgoing to be ready to shoot
myself.
Dude, you know what I'm saying.
It was like crazy.
(15:10):
Even with the good hang, evenwith the years of experience,
what is something that you stillstruggle with and you still
work on when it comes to doingthese kind of corporate gigs and
trying to, like you say, findways to be better?
Speaker 1 (15:23):
That is difficult in this particular band because
it's so nuanced.
As a horn player yeah, as ahorn player, I take the
occasional solo, but in thisparticular band the forms never
change.
We don't really get intoanything that opens up, so it's
(15:46):
kind of different for me.
I'm sort of playing the samething.
There's always a chance, Iguess, to I focus on my
intonation.
There's always that, I guess,for anybody, for a vocalist or a
horn player or whatever it'slike well, you want to sound the
best you can.
I focus on my intonation.
There's always that, I guess,for anybody you know, for a
vocalist or a horn player orwhatever it's like.
Well, you want to sound thebest you can.
You know I focus on details.
I'm like okay, my articulationfrom the beginning of the note
to the middle of the note, whichis my intonation, to the way
that I release, and trying to dothat with other horn players.
(16:08):
The challenge for me is I playwith different horn players
every week, which is unique tothis band, and some I've found
that I mesh with extremely well.
Like you said, we go toBirmingham.
Shout out to Jacob Walker.
Yeah, jacob was with us lastnight.
He's the man I love playingwith him Terrific trumpet player
, me and him got great synergy.
(16:29):
It's like we just know whatwe're doing every single time.
Yeah To playing with somebodyI've never met before and maybe
they aren't even primarily ahorn player.
It might just be something theydo on the side.
And sometimes that getsdifficult as well, because it's
like I'm not sure if these arethe greatest choices that you're
making.
And how do I say this kindly toyou?
But also, I'm working, so Ihave to get my point across.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
So that's the challenge typically, I think,
for me.
When I first started the band.
I remember the first three gigswere the hardest three gigs for
me One because I was strugglingwith trying to memorize
everything and two, you know, Ididn't realize the hot mic thing
, like I remember.
The second gig I did was inNashville.
We were at the Symphony Hall.
There they asked for Sweetalabama and I was still learning
(17:13):
that song.
Yeah, like I didn't.
I like, you know, you grow uphearing it, but like I wasn't
some kid listening to leonardskinner back at st louis, like
we don't care about that shit.
So I am learning these wordsand he says, all right, sweet
home alabama.
In my ear.
So I'm hearing it in my earinstead of keeping it to myself
(17:36):
or thinking like looking at himand saying something I say in
the mic all right, let's see ifI can get this one down.
And I'm thinking I'm justtalking to Ant, but actually I'm
talking to the audience and I'mlike, oh, and they complained
about that.
Yeah, yeah.
The next day Ant called me andwas like yeah, I just got off
the phone with the weddingplanner and the bride was very
upset because you were sayingthings in the mic and I was like
(17:58):
, oh you know, and I was stilllearning, but other than that
weird shit, that isn't reallythe thing I was gonna bring up.
I would lose my voice after gigsbecause three hours straight,
or you know, we get an extrahour added on top of just
singing and not being able totruly either hear myself in
these ear things that I'd neverused the monitor in my ear
(18:20):
before.
I like are we in a venue insideand it's echoey, or we're
outside and we can't hearanything, like those first three
gigs.
I was like yo, I am losing myvoice.
I don't know if I'm going to beable to sing next week because
I've lost my voice so bad.
And so, ever since then to now,I still work to specifically
(18:43):
not hold back but not pushduring certain points of that
night, because I'm like I'mgoing to need this energy for
this is how we do it.
Or I'm going to need thisenergy for when we get to hot in
here.
I'm going to need this energyfor shout, like I want to make
sure that my voice is strongwhen we get there.
So when I'm singing, come andget your love.
I'm not going to overdo it.
(19:04):
You know what I'm saying andI'm going to sound good and I'm
going to breathe and I'm goingto make sure I articulate and
I'm going to let the audiencesing with me.
And it's this balance of wherecan I fit in, where can I take
breaks mid-show.
That's kind of the seesaw thatkeeps me very interested in
these gigs, because it is adifferent approach each gig.
(19:26):
This last gig was a primeexample of that.
I've done 24 Karat a milliontimes with y'all and I do it the
same way.
But when I first started doingit I would sing it more.
But by the time I've gotten towhere I am now, I'm usually
speaking the lyrics a lot morethan I am singing the lyrics to
save my voice.
And then, with me runningaround the room, I did a 20
(19:48):
minute yoga session that day andI was breathing all day and
actually wake up and I did mymorning routine, which I
normally don't get to do onSaturdays because I'm usually up
at three in the morning.
But I got to wake up, have mymatcha, do my walk and usually I
do a mile walk and when I dothe mile walk I'm doing a
breathing exercise where Ibreathe in and breathe in and do
(20:09):
that the entire mile to kind ofhelp create the illusion that
I'm singing for a mile straightthrough the way I'm breathing,
you know what I'm saying.
And so being able to do thatand then go and do 24 Karat
Magic and run, literally run,around the room three times
(20:30):
during the song while singing it, still, that's something that
I've been working on since I gotin a band and I'm to the place
where I'm like, oh damn, I canactually, you know, do it.
I want to pivot from music andfrom the band to your religion
(20:50):
in the way that you approacheverything now because, like you
said, this all does kind ofcombine and it's something
that's very unique being withthe band and being in a place
where you know there's timeswhere we're performing and you
have to fast and you're not ableto actually like eat or
anything, and we're all eatingand drinking, or there's moments
where you know you have to taketime away from the band and go
(21:11):
pray and find your space andyour peace within the chaos that
is our band.
When did you convert and howdid that lifestyle change?
Did it affect your music career, like, in any way?
Like, did you feel like it wassomething that you struggle with
when you started it Because itwas so different from before.
(21:31):
Just give me kind of anoverview of the beginning of
becoming a Muslim.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
So this was this past .
March was my second Ramadan andI converted, or sometimes, as
we say, reverted, which is aconcept maybe we can get into,
but that was about a year andtwo months ago.
But I think about it in my headas how many Ramadan's I've done
, which is an interestingconcept because that period of
(21:59):
time will change.
It doesn't coincide with thecalendar that the world runs on,
the Gregorian calendar, so itwill continue to shift
throughout our Gregorian year,but only a little bit each year.
So this was my second Ramadan.
Did it affect my music andmusic career?
Absolutely Two major reasons,the biggest reason being in
(22:22):
Sunni Islam in particular, whichis I don't consider myself
Sunni.
I don't like all the sectbreakdown Again, a totally
different concept maybe we'llget into.
I'm a Muslim, I don't want tosay I'm Sunni, but this is more
so.
What I've studied, so to speak,is Sunni concepts, literature
related to Sunni Islam.
(22:42):
There is a lot of evidence thatcompiles against music in
general as entertainment, as apastime, as being something that
is not permitted.
I understand that the evidenceis very overwhelming and the
reasoning is very overwhelming,and the reasoning is very
overwhelming, and the reasoningbeing because, all of a sudden I
stepped back and I looked atwhat I was doing.
I had a church gig one time andI was in church and I'm
(23:03):
thinking am I allowed to be inhere playing music for a
different religion?
And then I'm thinking about itand I said that's the least of
my worries If I'm playing inenvironments like bars or I'm
playing in environments wherethere's women dressed a
particular kind of way, there'salcohol everywhere, people are
out of their mind.
But I'm worried about oh, can Ibe playing in the church right
now?
I really have not come incontact with very many musical
(23:26):
scenarios in my life period, andespecially now that I'm aware
of it, where it's something thatactually does coincide with
spirituality as I understand it.
So I hear people talk about howmusic is a spiritual thing all
the time.
This is a very complexconversation for me.
Do I think it can be?
Yes, do I think that peoplejust say that and don't actually
think about it?
Speaker 2 (23:46):
Yes, I totally agree with you when you say that.
You know, with me I feel like Ireally listen to music, if that
makes sense.
Like people sit down and belike, oh, I have these playlists
and I do this, and I'll befeeling like we as a generation
and as a culture zone out mostof the time.
You know.
(24:06):
So when a lot of people arelistening to music, they're
doing stuff.
They're not even really payingattention to the music but, like
for me, it's really incredibleto hear every element of a song
and when you talk to certainpeople who just want to start
conversation and they're justlike you know, I kind of had
this out of body experience whenI was hearing the song and this
and that it's just like you'refull of shit, dude.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
You know what I'm saying.
Well, and they may have, but myquestion is was that a good
thing?
What did that produce, otherthan you felt a dopamine rush?
Yeah, I mean that's great, weall like a dopamine rush but
what did you take away from that?
Speaker 2 (24:47):
Did it make you think that you, oh, I didn't think of
anything.
What do you mean?
You didn't think of anythingwhen you were listening to the
song Problematic?
Yeah, I agree, I get that, Isee that, and that's really
interesting to take that angleon it where you're like I don't
see anything spiritual throughmusic, because I would assume,
as someone who is religious andplay normally, you would find a
(25:10):
way to correlate those twothings.
But for you to say like, oh, Idon't see it, that's interesting
.
How for you to say like, oh, Idon't see it, that's interesting
.
How do you feel that developed?
When did that start?
When did you have that momentof realization of?
I don't really connect thesetwo things?
Speaker 1 (25:22):
About the time that I was really getting into Islam.
Yeah, like even before I tookShahada, which is our public
declaration of faith Iinterestingly I guess I guess
this is okay to to talk about.
You know, it's not, it's notscary, but I sort of had like a
nervous breakdown where I hadbeen, I had been idolizing music
(25:46):
to such a degree, and musiciansat that.
And when I came out of thatbreakdown I looked back at it.
I was starting to develop thoseconcepts of like number one
musicians are just people and alot of these musicians that I
idolized were not great people.
Yes, and we talk about the good.
Can you separate the artist fromthe art?
And it's like sure you can dothat.
(26:13):
But then also, at the end ofthe day, what fruits did that
art itself actually produce thatwere beneficial to a community
of people?
Did that art indeed putpositive messages into a
community?
Did it feed a community ofpeople?
Did it cause a community ofpeople to come together and do
something positive in society,in American society especially,
we talk about how those thingshappen all of the time, but we
have to talk about it concretelyand not just like music brings
(26:35):
people together, okay, but howdoes it bring people together?
Because people coming togetheris still not a concrete concept.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
They came together and did what we came together
and brought further along whatyou and I've had this
conversation before too wherethe whole Kendrick Lamar thing
is of the.
Super Bowl and brought Drakeout with him and had some sort
of patching up.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
You know, and I don't know, that's not really for me
to get into, but I just thought,oh, that would have been a
beautiful thing.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
It would have been beautiful, but this whole
situation isn't about beingbeautiful.
Like it's gotten ugly incertain ways and you see the way
that the music has kind ofaffected both artists.
You know saying they're goingthrough a court case right now.
You know saying and people werelike raving about this.
I mean, I feel like you can seethis in other places and this
(27:31):
is kind of divergent for whatyou're saying, but it feels like
the same thing to me.
Where you hear all of this itbrings people together in this
greatness and that, but thenthey paint it in a certain light
as if it's this great thing butthen it could be very negative
to others.
A great example of that wouldbe in the NBA.
There was this big fight thathappened called the Malice in
the Palace.
It was years ago.
(27:52):
The players jumped in theaudience and were hitting fans
and stuff.
It was crazy.
It was this crazy moment andnothing about that is good.
Nothing about that is good.
No, nothing about that is good,period.
But of course we're in a worldnow where years later, people
(28:13):
can reflect and recently I justsaw an interview where dude was
like that was the greatest shitever.
Talk about how great it wasthat they did this, how they
were in the audience fighting,how great it was.
And it's like I'm not out herecalling them thugs or anything
ridiculous like that, because Ihate that they do that to nba
players who are millionaires.
These aren't thugs.
These are people who work theirass off and you just don't like
the way they wear their hair orthe way they look.
(28:34):
But what they did wasn't goodand over glorifying and making
it sound like it was somemarvelous thing that everyone
should look up to and be aboutis not OK.
And so when you bring it backto the music and the element of
this Kendrick versus Drake thing, it's like, in ways, I see why
people would idolize this.
But you know, drake said thatKendrick was a wife beater.
(28:55):
Kendrick said that Drake was apedophile.
They can't prove any of thisstuff.
They're just speaking to makeothers look bad.
And now other people arearguing about who's right, who's
wrong, arguing about if this isgood, if this is bad, and it's
like none of that is good what Ijust said.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
And none of it is relevant to any of our lives.
Yes, yes.
You know, me and my wife weretalking about something
hilarious.
We walked out the door thismorning to got coffee and
whatnot and beautiful thing, andwe brought up somebody from
that was like a reality TV star,a singer, somebody like that,
and we were trying to figure outwhat they were.
Yeah, we're like were they asinger?
Were they reality?
(29:34):
We couldn't remember and wesaid, you know, isn't it crazy?
We used to sit at home.
I don't have TV anymore, but weused to sit at home and you
would watch reality TV, youwould watch somebody else's life
.
I have my own life, but I'msitting here watching somebody
else.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
That's weird, I'm saying there's people who their
whole life is like sitting downin front of a TV playing video
games and being a war war, twosoldier, and you're talking to
your guys around the world andyou're you're in the trenches
and this is your life.
Speaker 1 (30:15):
This is what you do on the regular.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
It's like that's not reality, fake life yeah, it's
not reality at all.
But every single day you dothis, do what you do.
No beef, I get.
Everyone has to do what theylove.
And if that's what you love, Ilove singing.
So you might look at my lifeand be like you fucking weirdo
going out and singing songs andtrying to get people to look at
you all damn day and dancing andall of this bullshit.
(30:36):
It's like I get it.
I sound like a weirdo tosomeone else, but when it comes
to living your life, youshouldn't have to feel like you
have to post on Facebook everytime you take a good picture.
You shouldn't have to feel likeI have to sit down in front of
this TV to escape the world thatI live in.
You shouldn't have to, like yousaid, the spiritual moment with
(30:57):
the music, sit down and playmusic and be like all right, I
want to use this mood music tojust forget about my
responsibilities and evaporatefrom reality for a little bit.
It's like how can you findmoments to do these things and
also live your life, you know,say like, yeah, there's this.
(31:17):
This book I read and he wastalking about how monks everyone
assumed that they're just theseincredible meditators and they
know how to do it perfectly andwe just don't know what we're
doing.
When we do it, we're not doingit right.
And he said the secret tomeditation is that no one is
able to truly block anything outof their brain.
(31:38):
The idea is they've done it solong that they understand that
it's okay to let go.
So when you have a thought andyou're in this peaceful state,
they're able to hear it,recognize that thought and let
it go.
That's why they're able to stayinto that state and seem like
they're more focused than peoplearound you.
(31:59):
And the other day we were doingyoga at the venue.
Everyone came in and you knowour band Aunt them were laughing
.
They were like y'all breathinghard, this and that, like
talking crazy about all of us.
I would even say something yeah, exactly.
And Ben wasn't able to likejust do it.
Ben was like talking whiledoing it and I heard everything,
(32:20):
I witnessed everything.
But I was like just do it.
Ben was like talking whiledoing it and I heard everything,
I I witnessed everything.
But I was like okay, this is agood exercise to focus.
I'm doing this for a specificreason.
I'm not doing this for peopleto see me.
I'm not doing this for peopleto think, oh, he's so great.
I'm not even telling this story.
For people to think, oh, lookhow I'm telling this because
(32:41):
this is just my experience.
And I was going through thisand I was hearing it and I was
like, okay, but I'm breathing,so continue to breathe.
I hear it.
Okay, keep breathing.
Okay, next movement Keepbreathing, hear it, keep
breathing.
And if someone from the outsidenot knowing me saw that they
more likely would be like, andif someone from the outside not
knowing me saw that they morethan likely would be like, oh,
(33:02):
he was so zenned out, he blockedit all out, he didn't care.
And it was like no, I didn'tblock anything out, I heard
everything.
I was there for all of themoments.
I was irritated in my headabout the stuff, but then I let
that shit go and just kept onmoving.
You know what I'm saying,because that's life.
So having these moments whereyou feel like you have to just
(33:22):
completely eliminate yourselffrom reality is very frustrating
.
Because what happens when youcome back to reality?
What work did you do duringthat time?
You weren't participating,nothing, and so many people
assume that that's the best wayto work through problems and
it's like no, you got to bewilling to work during those
(33:45):
hard times on this shit.
How can you let it go?
Or how can you take it andtotally have that flow through
your body and then let it flowout of your body?
How do you work on that?
And it just takes a lot ofself-reflection understanding
your mental state, understandingwhat bothers you, why it
bothers you, what can you dodifferently to maybe not let it
(34:08):
bother you anymore?
You know.
Speaker 1 (34:09):
Yeah, I almost venture to say when people refer
to something being spiritual orspiritual matter, spiritual
practice if there isn't apractical application wrapped up
in that somewhere, I struggleto see how it's spiritual.
So in Islam, we pray five timesa day.
I've been doing this for anentire year.
Sometimes I don't want to do it, that's the honest truth.
(34:30):
Sometimes I love it, but from aspiritual standpoint, what I
would say is we believe thatwhat we're doing is trying to
invoke the mercy of Allah, ofGod, into our lives each time we
do it.
From a practical standpoint,what it does to go and interrupt
what I'm doing five times a dayto wake me up in the morning,
to stop work, to leave it's areminder that this is who I am
(34:55):
and this is what I abide by.
And so when I leave that and Igo back to doing the regular
stuff I'm doing, how could I docertain things that I used to do
, having just done that, havingjust entered a space where my
brain is supposed to be totallyfocused on higher things and on
God, and then I turn around andthen go right back to doing
(35:15):
something filthy, as we wouldsay, and it's like.
So that's the practicalapplication of it and otherwise,
if there wasn't, and it's like,so that's the practical
application of it and you knowotherwise, if it was, if there
wasn't, and I was like this is aspiritual thing for me, you say
, okay, but how?
To my brain?
That doesn't make too muchsense Not to put judgment on
other people if they have aspiritual practice that doesn't
have a practical application.
But I would just, I would begthe question.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
That's important for you and the people around you,
and I see it often.
Just yesterday I was talking toa friend.
They were telling me about thislast work venture that they had
and how this last work ventureis shaping the way that they're
going to move forward.
They're more than likely notgoing to do the things in the
field that they're traininganymore because it has been very
(35:57):
frustrating, hard and they'vebeen kind of getting hit with
reality left and right, noticingthat there isn't a lot of stuff
fighting for them and they'renot willing to fight for this
field anymore.
And they were talking to meabout a person who had came to
them and bought up this veryweird thing.
(36:17):
They said that this environmentthat they were working in was
very misogynistic and theydidn't enjoy it and it was a
female.
And my friend was like whatexactly happened?
I felt like it was like I feltlike we were pretty open and we
were looking now what could wehave done to make it better for
you?
Because I'm sorry if I was theperson that affected you.
(36:38):
And the person was like no, youweren't, but it was just.
That was just the vibethroughout.
He was like okay, what examplesdo you have what happened and
they were like I just it wasjust the way I felt it was the
vibe.
It was the vibe.
And there are times I've been inarguments where someone tried
to get me to emphasize things.
And the reason why I wasn'table to emphasize it because
(36:58):
mentally I knew the personwasn't trying to hear what I was
saying.
They were trying to find a wayto deflect and flip what I was
saying and manipulate my visualinstead of actually hearing me
out.
So it was hard for me to finishthat conversation because I was
like you're not, like you'renot asking me this for the right
reasons.
But in this situation he wasasking them for the right
(37:19):
reasons.
He was like I really do want tohelp, I really do want to
change, I really do want to makethings better.
And they didn't really have anyconcrete evidence.
They were just saying stuff to,in my opinion, more than likely
, manipulate them and make themfeel bad or try to get them on
their side so that they can goto someone else and flip the
switch again.
(37:40):
And it's just like this wholecrazy thing that could collapse
all around and everybody will beaffected.
And it's like there's no logichere, there's no plan.
There's no, like you said,there's nothing practical being
used.
This is just someone who morelikely doesn't have the proper
(38:00):
experience, doesn't have theproper work ethic to even be in
this situation, trying to find away to make it seem like they
are okay in this situation.
You know what I'm saying.
It is like this whole thing isTrump.
The moment that you ask themwhat actually is going on and
they're like, oh, I'm not goingto answer that question, what do
(38:22):
you mean?
You know what I'm saying?
I feel like that's a constantthing that we deal with in life.
That's why we're in the crapthat we're in as a society,
because we're dealing withpeople who aren't willing to
explain themselves.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
Yeah, it's frustrating and it's twisted and
that gets dark real fast.
Speaker 2 (38:43):
I'm not going to take away from the show too much.
I just wanted to make sure Ijumped in here and shouted out
my guy Scott.
I appreciate him for being onthe show.
He isn't really the type ofperson that shares too much with
the world in general when itcomes to his family and his
emotions.
I just appreciate him beingvulnerable and coming on the
show and actually speaking truthand just hanging out.
(39:04):
It's always good to see him.
I'm looking forward to moreperformances together and more
shows and gigs and all that jazz.
He's a wonderful saxophoneplayer.
He's a great friend, anincredible person, and I'm very
happy that he's getting sometime with his wife to actually
relax.
But he's already back togigging now.
So this is short-lived.
(39:25):
He was out for a bit, but thesecond he could get back to it
he jumped back on the horn and Icouldn't be more happy for him.
So shout-out to Scott.
I hope you all are enjoying theshow.
Please make sure to gosubscribe, follow the podcast,
share the podcast, telleverybody about it.
A lot of people have beencoming to me about different
topics.
I'm excited to put togethersome new shows and the rest of
(39:47):
the season is going to be very,very fun.
So I hope y'all stick alongwith us and, once again, thank
you.
Emotion.
Emotion is something thatdrives all of us, something that
pushes all of us, and musicemotion pushes you through music
and how you portray the song,how you do the song.
(40:08):
If I do the way you looktonight, tonight, tomorrow and
the day after, there are threedifferent ways.
I could sing that song with thesame lyrics but portray it with
different emotion.
When it comes to religion andtrying to be more disciplined,
that's my word of the year.
My theme of the year has beendiscipline.
(40:29):
I want to be more disciplinedin the way I live and the way I
approach my life, and this yearhas been difficult because I
started off strong.
Then there was moments where Iwas having some trouble within
my family and emotionally notable to really comprehend what
was happening around me, and somy discipline around all of that
kind of slipped, and I'm slowlygetting back to how I was at
(40:52):
the beginning of the year.
I'm still hitting my yoga, I'mstill doing my breathing
exercises, I'm still writing,I'm still creating, I'm still
adding more to my plate so thatI can continue to grow.
I love to hear this too.
I appreciate it.
I appreciate it, but it'simportant for me and emotionally
, I think I am in a greatheadspace now because I am
(41:14):
starting to commit more to thediscipline and I'm not doing it
for any other reason, but for me.
I'm not doing it for any otherreason but for me.
I'm not doing it for anyoneelse.
My wife is benefited from it.
People in my life are benefitedfrom it, because I'm looking at
me and saying what can I do tomake sure I'm good, so that I
can affect the world and thisand that For you.
(41:35):
When you think about yourcareer musically, when you think
about even the injury thatyou're going through right now
that is preventing you fromperforming music and doing
different things, when you thinkabout your religion and you
think about the way that youapproach life, because of that,
emotionally, where do you thinkyou are?
Oh, that's, that's so difficult.
(41:55):
I understand, I understand.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
To quantify emotion, or even.
You know, like I said before, Ihave much conflict about
playing music, yeah, and stilldo, and wonder if this isn't a
period to reflect upon that.
Lately, in all honesty, playingmusic has just been something
(42:22):
that I love to do, just to bereal as can be.
It's usually about me and italso brings about a beauty of
being able to hang out withpeople that I love.
In almost any musical scenariothat I'm in, as of late as of
the past year or two, I'm alwayssurrounded by people that I
(42:43):
love being around.
So I love the camaraderie of it.
We all love the feeling ofsomebody saying, oh man, that
music, it touched me.
Or man, I love that music.
That's a wonderful thing, butit's also great to have touched
somebody else again.
I don't know what I did forthem, but it makes me feel good.
I think that's the differenceof where I'm at now versus where
(43:05):
I used to be.
It used to be like, oh well,I'm really doing good out here
playing music.
I don't know what good I'mdoing playing music other than I
love to do it.
I love to watch other peoplelove to do it.
I love to listen to it.
I love the camaraderie.
Emotionally I'm upset that Ican't play, but that's kind of
(43:33):
it.
I'm still at an odd point withmusic and in my prayers I
constantly ask like, am Isupposed to be doing this?
Is this serving a purpose in mylife?
Is it serving a purpose inother people's lives?
Is it something that I can justenjoy and make some money on
the side doing?
Because I'm not sure if I wouldever at this point want it to
(43:56):
consume my life.
You know that my day job is Icut down trees and that's the
way I make money and I love todo that as well and that serves
the purpose of I make money.
I have a day job and musicserves the purpose of bringing
me joy and bringing me somemoney.
If that became my main sourceof income, I would still need
(44:20):
something else in my life toserve a greater purpose.
Music can't be the end all beall For me.
It can't.
Speaker 2 (44:30):
I read this book and they were very specific about
knowing your purpose and beingable to approach your purpose
within your relationship, tomove forward positively in your
relationship and for me.
I had been working on what ismy purpose since January and
(44:51):
Adrian and I would work throughthis worksheet and kind of get
our heads right and I finallygot to a place where I think I
was the most happy creativelyright after college, where I was
creating opportunities, I wasdoing shows, I was producing
(45:11):
albums, I was writing newmaterial and going out and
hiring artists to work with meand we were consistently doing
stuff.
I'm still doing that.
I still do the jam and stillput shows together.
But slowly but surely over theyears I've kind of gotten bitten
(45:34):
by the production and theproducer bug and each time I
produce something myself it getsa little bit more difficult for
me to want to produce somethingafterwards because everything
is just so difficult workingwith certain people, working
with venues, venues trying tounderpay you, people not paying
(45:58):
attention to the words in yourcontracts and trying to pay you
too late, not willing to pay you, people not paying attention to
the words in your contracts andtrying to pay you too late, not
willing to pay you the properamount, looking at you like
you're some type of you know.
Why should we pay you fullprice?
You're not.
You know, bruno Mars, you know,yeah.
But with that being said, thebest me was the person who was
(46:19):
creating opportunities forothers.
I feel like, and I feel like mypurpose is creating media,
podcast shows, musicals, music,anything, creating stuff, making
opportunities where I'm hiringartists to do what they love to
(46:41):
do.
That's my purpose, I think, iscreating opportunities, which is
kind of interesting that I'vegotten to that place, because
it's like does that mean I'llever profit from that?
Does that mean that I'll alwaysbe the one constantly in the
back?
Will I be underappreciated?
Will I be creatingopportunities for people and
(47:01):
then wake up one day and it'slike all these people are doing
so well and I'm just kind ofhere trying.
Still, I don't know, but Itruly think that's my purpose is
to create opportunities.
If you were to word it, do youknow that what you would say
your purpose is right now?
Speaker 1 (47:22):
I'll say what has been shown to me as of recent
long-term, I'm not sure.
As of recent, my bigger purposehas been centered around family
.
Yeah, me as a husband, as a son, as a brother all those things
have become incredibly importantto me, more important than they
were previously.
(47:42):
Yeah, like those types ofthings are just so much more
important to me, more importantthan they were previously.
Yeah, like those types ofthings are just so much more
important to me than than mydesire to play music or my
desire to do it could beanything, anything that's,
that's, you know, enjoyable thatI'm like, oh, this is such a
big part of my life, but it'slike those things are bigger.
Yeah, I think there's a lot ofgeneral purposes, like just like
what we've talked about, likeaffecting people positively, but
(48:05):
affecting people positively byshowing them that my particular
lifestyle and this even comesdown.
I'll tell you one thing thatI've watched myself affect other
people positively is like mydiet.
Yeah, it's like the way youknow, I'm extremely regimented
and disciplined, like in my mydiet and my job is exercise, so
I stay in good shape.
(48:26):
I'm a big advocate for thosethings, and so you know if I, if
I watch somebody else beaffected by that, if they see
how it's playing out in my lifeand they they think, well, yeah,
I'm, I'm tired all the time orI'm not, you know, I'm, I'm
having health difficulties orwhatever it's like.
If I affect somebody positivelyin that way, I think that's it,
and it doesn't always involvegetting in somebody's face and
(48:49):
telling them what they should bedoing.
Speaker 3 (48:54):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (50:23):
This is a little ditty that we did at one of our
recent jam sessions.
Scott always comes out andplays sax and I do a jam session
at JB's Record Lounge everymonth here in Atlanta.
I try to do it the first Fridayof every month and this was
just a good time.
They're always swinging hardand I love doing this one.
But if you want to check me outfor more of my music and all
(50:45):
the stuff that I have on everyplatform, just go listen to my
music anywhere album music,spotify, amazon it's there.
You can check me out for moreinformation at donlamorecom,
where you can get anything andeverything.
Donlamore, you know what I love?
Every morning, I do a walk inthe morning and it's like a mile
(51:10):
.
I talked about that earlier inthe pod.
Recently I've added a newelement to it where, instead of
like listening to a podcast orlistening to like some you know,
kendrick or hip hop or anylyrics, I've been playing just
instrumental jazz.
That way, I don't have anythinglike that I have to sing along
(51:30):
to.
I don't have anything that Ihave to like hear.
I could just enjoy the music,hear the instrumentation and
focus on my breathing.
So I've been listening to a lotof different artists, but the
one that I'm going to say I'm inlove with right now.
It's so simple, but this jazzpianist, bg Adair.
(51:52):
Okay, I know the name yeah, thatI try to approach certain songs
.
I've never been the type to doa bunch of runs.
I've never been the type toexaggerate anything too much.
I like to be very simple and Ilike to emphasize the lyrics,
(52:16):
and so the way that BG plays thepiano does that, and it's
really enjoyable to hear her dostandards and different stuff
that I just love.
There's a cover of the Way youLook Tonight, or they Can't Take
that Away From Me the Gershwintune that I just every day I'm
(52:36):
like, ah, love this.
And that's kind of been thepast couple of days.
I've listened to that.
I've done some Miles Davis,I've done a whole bunch of
different instrument-focusedjazz, but that's what I'm loving
right now.
How about you?
You?
Speaker 1 (52:49):
know what I love is this time of year.
This is my favorite time ofyear.
It's springtime.
I was a spring baby.
Everything is blooming.
I love being outside watchingthe trees and the flowers, and
the air feels so good, and Iknow that some people hate the
pollen it doesn't bother me andgoing outside and there's
(53:10):
sunshine and there's a littlebit of rain every once in a
while as well.
It's just absolutely myfavorite time of year.
Speaker 2 (53:19):
All right, man.
We made it to the final segmentof the night.
Speaker 1 (53:44):
We've spoken about everything that we want to speak
about.
We've touched every topic.
We want to.
All I want like a podcast.
I think you have a verypositive emotional effect on
people and you're a verypositive person as well.
Try, Even when me and you havehad a conversation about
something like we'retroubleshooting something, it's
not extremely negative.
You have such a way that youapproach stuff.
I love it, man.
I love it.
(54:04):
It's something to look up to.
Speaker 2 (54:06):
I appreciate you, man .
Cheers to you once again.
Thank you for coming out.
I'm going, man.
Yeah, I want to thank you forlistening to the Black man
Talking Emotions podcast.
The opening quote.
Credit goes to Amit Ray andshout out to my guy, scott, for
(54:28):
being on the pod.
Follow Scott at ScottBoxunderscore E on Instagram.
Please subscribe to the podcast, share the podcast and give us
a good rating Five stars, please.
And thank you.
You can support the show byclicking the link at the bottom
of the episode description.
Also, tell me your plans forthis coming year.
(54:49):
We should collab.
If you liked this episode, youshould check out overcoming
challenges and embracing familylife with benjamin stevens.
That's a previous episode thatI did with another member from
my band, big bling and the funkmachine, and it was all about
family and music and beingmarried and so much more, and go
check that out.
Follow me at D O M underscore LA M O U R on Instagram or at
(55:13):
Dom Lamorecom.
I'm Dom Lamore.
Much love, thank you.
We talk about the good.
Can you separate the artistfrom the art?
And it's like sure you can dothat.
But then also, at the end ofthe day, what fruits did that
art itself actually produce thatwere beneficial to a community
of people?
Did that art indeed putpositive messages into a
community?
Did it feed a community ofpeople?
Did it cause a community ofpeople to come together and do
(00:23):
something positive?
In society, in american societyespecially?
We talk about how those thingshappen all the time.
Yeah, but we have to talk aboutit concretely and not just like
music brings people together,okay, but how does it bring
people together?
Because people coming togetheris still not a concrete concept.
They came together and did whatwe came together and brought
further along what ladies andgentlemen, and anyone else who
(00:53):
is here.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
My name is dom lamore and you are listening to the
black man talking emotionspodcast.
On today's episode, I speakwith my guy, scott Box, about
his recent hand injury.
Music, religion and so muchmore.
It does not matter how long youare spending on the earth, how
(01:27):
much money you have gathered orhow much attention you have
received.
It is about the amount ofpositive vibration you have
radiated in life that matters.
(01:53):
So I feel like we're in a uniqueplace right now because I feel
like the reason why we're ableto speak today and it was no
conflict or we didn't have tomess anything up it's because
you're injured and you're one ofthose people that you are
usually moving and grooving somuch that it's really hard to
kind of get you for one secondlike outside of work.
When I'm working, you'reworking with me, and then when
(02:14):
I'm at home, you're usuallyworking.
I want to start this kind of atwhere are you at mentally with
your injury?
As a saxophone player who needsyour fingers every day to work,
not being able to work playingthe instrument that I'm sure you
(02:38):
play every single day?
How has that affected you?
Are you okay?
Do you feel like it's beendifficult for you, or are you
actually enjoying a little bitof the be able to breathe a
little bit?
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Yeah, it's, it's.
It's difficult.
I can't stand not being able todo stuff.
I can't stand not being able towork.
I love to work, I love to play,I love to work.
The two have become one, in asense, in my life.
I was super depressed when itfirst happened.
It's not the first time I'vehad a debilitating injury that
kept me from being able to play.
For a few weeks.
I feel, you know, I'm like Ican't even wash a dish over here
(03:11):
.
Everything takes me twice aslong.
It is getting better.
It's not like I can't use thishand at all, but I have a
forefinger and a thumb, which isalso a beautiful thing.
Praise God, it gave me anappreciation for having two
working limbs.
I'll say that much At the endof the day, for me, everything
happens with a reason, with apurpose, and I'm still trying to
(03:31):
figure out what that is.
But maybe I need to sit downfor a minute and just relax.
I've spent more time with mywife already.
That's a beautiful thing.
Hopefully it's forcing me toslow down, to really take in
everything that I'm doing, topay attention to details more.
So I think these are thingsthat are important in life and I
like to go, go, go, go go.
So yeah, it's been difficult.
I'm really not enjoying it atall.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
I understood some of the struggles you have with us
gigging and the way that thewedding band really works and
how we're out and about and ittakes up so much of our lives,
even today.
Like I originally planned thisto be at two and we started at
around two.
But like if this was a normalweekend and I wasn't, well, not
normal.
If this was a weekend, I wasn'tworking, I would have been able
(04:25):
to do this as early as youwanted to and been good to go,
but since I worked last night,there's no way I was going to be
able to do it before oneo'clock.
You know, like there'sabsolutely no way.
I got home last night, Adriennehad headphones in her ears,
which all affects me.
Weird, because I usually comein and give her a big kiss and
say hi, and she's like I don'twant you to touch me.
I'm putting headphones onbecause I need a full night's
(04:52):
rest.
Leave me alone.
And I was like, well damn, I'mjust a piece of meat, walking in
the dark, getting dressed,brushing my teeth in the dark
and trying my best not to wakeher up.
And then I wake up in themorning to her being like I'm
leaving.
I was like, oh okay, and soit's just me at the house and
I'm not going to see her untiltonight and I'm going to be
cooking her dinner.
She's going to walk in the doorlike, oh, you're here and I'll
be like you left me Anyway.
(05:12):
But with that being said, it'sreally interesting seeing how
the band really affects my lifeon a regular basis.
It's part of my normal now.
It's part of what I prepare for.
I prep for I get myself right,I do my yoga and my breathing
exercises so that I can be readyto execute the performance but
(05:34):
then also recover from theperformance.
Last night was a particularlydifferent type of wedding.
We had about 300 guests whenwere y'all.
We were in Birmingham and theyhad us do a small dance set, so
we had a 20 minute dance set tostart and they had all the
lights up.
It was really bright.
Everyone was still sitting down.
(05:54):
No one was on the dance floorexcept for a couple of older
people got over to dance to AlGreen and then we took our break
.
I came back and you know I'mthe emcee, so I started out with
the speeches and got everybodytalking and up and about.
Then we got the band back onstage for 24K Magic, the first
song, usually, of the set.
Instead of singing it on stage,I did four laps around the room
(06:18):
getting people out of theirseats so that they would
actually go to the dance floorfor September.
You know what I'm saying and I'mlike literally running around
the entire venue Get up, get up,get up, get up.
Let's go From that start to theend.
I may have ran around that roomat least 13, 14 times, so I'm
more tired tonight than Inormally would be.
(06:39):
You know what I'm saying and itaffects me mentally, physically
, spiritually, and so to see howjust my body and how I am
affected and I'm still like,okay, we're doing this every
weekend.
I can only imagine someone whoyou know you started with the
band pretty much eight years ago.
(06:59):
Right, I did this hiddenblessing comes out where it's
like okay, I see you'restruggling, I see this is
something that you're doingbecause you do love it, but it's
hard and it's something that'sgoing against some of your
morals.
It's time for you to take abreak, and you're not going to
do it yourself, so I'm going todo it for you, kind of blessing.
I feel like I see it more assomething like oh man, I,
(07:23):
actually I get it now.
I see it more as something like, oh man, I, actually I get it
now.
I think that that would beincredible to have that time to
really get to sit back, reflectand kind of look forward to
what's going to be the next moveforward.
Are you seeing it in that way?
And I know you say you're stillnot enjoying it, but are you
finding those little moments oflike okay, yes, yes, this is
(07:43):
good.
I know it sucks, but this isgood.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
Yeah, I mean I'm forced to see it that way if I
want to have any positivity inmy life.
Yeah, because I am prone to bevery frustrated and get angry
very quickly, which is somethingthat I've worked past few years
and gotten better and better,better and, god willing, I'll
continue to get even better.
So in order for me to seethings in a positive light, I
(08:07):
had to see it that way.
And also, exactly what you justsaid mirrors what my wife has
said as well, so it's prettyevident.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but it's fire.
I mean just to kind of pivot towhat we do as musicians and
artists that travel with thecorporate band and then on top
of that we're producingdifferent projects outside of
that band, trying to keepourselves moving and working and
doing the music that we want todo outside of the corporate
(08:39):
stuff that we kind of have to doto make money.
To do to make money.
It's a lot.
It's constantly moving.
It's constantly you having tocome up with new approaches,
ideas.
How can you make your nextperformance more unique than the
last performance?
Yes, and it always starts froma place of I really love doing
(09:00):
this.
So to pivot to the music part,where was that moment for you
where you were like this is whatI love.
So I'm willing to endure a lotof this bullshit, to continue to
do it, because we all got tosay, okay, this is kind of
annoying, but I love this somuch, I'm going to do it.
Where did that start for you?
Speaker 1 (09:19):
When I was younger, my mentality about the whole
thing was because I am amusician, this gives me an
opportunity to put theinstrument to my face, so I'm
getting playing time, whichmeans I'm getting better.
I'm playing with othermusicians, which means I'm
getting experience.
I'm making money as a musician,which is freeing up my time to
(09:40):
be able to practice.
In the beginning, that's whatit was all about.
It was how much can I free upmy time so that I can spend time
on the instrument, whichcoincided with if I'm gigging,
I'm also spending time on theinstrument, yep.
However, at this point in thisparticular band for me it was I
really loved hanging out withy'all music.
(10:01):
It got to a point where themusic wasn't so much helping me
put time in on my instrument.
I've reached a point now whereI need different environments in
order to get better.
The camaraderie was beautifuland I have, in fact, missed it.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Understood, understood.
I was just talking to someonethe other day.
They were asking me about theband and they were like, how did
you get in it?
And I was telling them my storyabout like oh, I just randomly
met this guy and he was likeyou're good, I'm going to tell
this guy about you.
And then I was in the band.
But I spoke about just how oneof the biggest things Anthony
told me off of our first meetingtogether was I heard you were a
(10:38):
good hang.
That was his number one thing.
It's so important.
I heard you were a good hangand since that was like what we
needed we needed good hangs inthis band.
I didn't need to hear you sing,I just needed someone that I
know we could be in a van withfor seven hours there and back
and you wouldn't be like themost annoying person in the
(10:59):
world or you wouldn't be someonewho would like kill the vibe of
the entire band.
And I feel like when heapproached bringing people in
that way, that's what built thiscamaraderie, because you you
were in the band before me.
Ben jorge and vanessa and aliawere all in the band, so, like
you had seen it with the bandprevious, then you stopped, came
(11:23):
back after we were completedand we're a whole different band
now, so you got a side of bothof them.
So do you feel like you noticedthat?
Oh, we actually.
That that's what changed your,because once again, you left the
band because you're like, yeah,I can't do this anymore.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
and then you came back and then you were like, oh,
I could stick around becausethis is a good hang that's
exactly what happened yeah yeah,because in the initial band I
was friends with everybody and Idid enjoy it, but it was not
like it was when I came back.
When I came back and then I mety'all and then even to the
(12:00):
point of I actually had met vanVanessa and passed her name
along to Anthony.
And then, once we were alltogether for a few weeks, I
talked to Anthony the other weekand I was like man, that's one
of the best hangs in a band thatI've ever had.
Ever.
We have too much fun.
It's ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
For sure.
Like you said, it sucked nothaving you this weekend because
we were in Birmingham.
And when we go to Birmingham itsucked not having you this
weekend because we were inBirmingham.
And when we go to Birminghamit's always a different element
because Birmingham is kind ofdeveloped into in my mental.
That's like our band home, likewe play in Birmingham more than
we play anywhere else More thanAtlanta, unfortunately but it
(12:41):
is like it's a place that whenwe go, like I know exactly where
I want to go eat, I knowexactly how I want to operate in
the city, we know where we goplay pool, we know we know the
city so well because we arethere so much that it almost
feels like it's a, it's theoffice.
Hey, we're going to the officethis week.
We're not going to New Orleans,we're going to the office, you
(13:01):
know, kind of thing.
So I can see exactly whatyou're talking about.
That hang element this week wasa little different because last
week I spent so much money onthe restaurant that we went to
because we get this buyout andI'm thinking, all right, I'm
just gonna get this small thing.
But it wasn't happy hour thistime and I'm used to going to
this restaurant.
You know I'm used to goingthere during happy hours.
(13:21):
I'm used to spending half theamount of money and I spent like
40 and we only got like 36 forthe buyout.
Yeah, and I was like I spentmore than I got for food.
This week I'm going going toChipotle.
I'm spending $10.
I'm going back to the venue,I'm not drinking, I'm not doing
(13:41):
anything extra.
Ben heard me say that, andAaliyah heard me say that, and
Leslie heard me say that and waslike I'm riding with you,
dominique, because we didn'twant to spend all the money.
And luckily, weirdly, this weekwe got our tip with our check.
They tipped us before the gig,which was fire.
Oh, it was so fire.
So we were like oh, we can gospend a little money on food.
(14:04):
And then I was like nope, nope,nope, I'm going to Chipotle,
I'm spending $10.
I'm coming back to the venue.
And they were like cool, wedoing it too to the venue.
And they were like cool, wedoing it too.
And we came back, we ate, wedid a yoga session for 20
minutes, then everybody elsecame into the room and we got
ready for the gig.
So it was like I was like thisis exactly how I'm going to
approach this.
(14:24):
I can't emphasize enough to theaudience, the people who are
listening to this pod, just howimportant having those moments,
having that energy, is with theband, because all of us love
doing this.
That's not the problem.
Each one of us enjoy what we'redoing.
We're playing the same flippingplaylist we have played for
years Over and over.
We might add three or foursongs every other so often, but
(14:47):
it's the same playlist, but weenjoy it so much.
We wake up on Saturday and wedo it and we enjoy it and we try
our best to have the most funas possible.
If I don't like the people inthe band, if I'm constantly
dreading being around them, I'mgoing to be ready to shoot
myself.
Dude, you know what I'm saying.
It was like crazy.
(15:10):
Even with the good hang, evenwith the years of experience,
what is something that you stillstruggle with and you still
work on when it comes to doingthese kind of corporate gigs and
trying to, like you say, findways to be better?
Speaker 1 (15:23):
That is difficult in this particular band because
it's so nuanced.
As a horn player yeah, as ahorn player, I take the
occasional solo, but in thisparticular band the forms never
change.
We don't really get intoanything that opens up, so it's
(15:46):
kind of different for me.
I'm sort of playing the samething.
There's always a chance, Iguess, to I focus on my
intonation.
There's always that, I guess,for anybody, for a vocalist or a
horn player or whatever it'slike well, you want to sound the
best you can.
I focus on my intonation.
There's always that, I guess,for anybody you know, for a
vocalist or a horn player orwhatever it's like.
Well, you want to sound thebest you can.
You know I focus on details.
I'm like okay, my articulationfrom the beginning of the note
to the middle of the note, whichis my intonation, to the way
that I release, and trying to dothat with other horn players.
(16:08):
The challenge for me is I playwith different horn players
every week, which is unique tothis band, and some I've found
that I mesh with extremely well.
Like you said, we go toBirmingham.
Shout out to Jacob Walker.
Yeah, jacob was with us lastnight.
He's the man I love playingwith him Terrific trumpet player
, me and him got great synergy.
(16:29):
It's like we just know whatwe're doing every single time.
Yeah To playing with somebodyI've never met before and maybe
they aren't even primarily ahorn player.
It might just be something theydo on the side.
And sometimes that getsdifficult as well, because it's
like I'm not sure if these arethe greatest choices that you're
making.
And how do I say this kindly toyou?
But also, I'm working, so Ihave to get my point across.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
So that's the challenge typically, I think,
for me.
When I first started the band.
I remember the first three gigswere the hardest three gigs for
me One because I was strugglingwith trying to memorize
everything and two, you know, Ididn't realize the hot mic thing
, like I remember.
The second gig I did was inNashville.
We were at the Symphony Hall.
There they asked for Sweetalabama and I was still learning
(17:13):
that song.
Yeah, like I didn't.
I like, you know, you grow uphearing it, but like I wasn't
some kid listening to leonardskinner back at st louis, like
we don't care about that shit.
So I am learning these wordsand he says, all right, sweet
home alabama.
In my ear.
So I'm hearing it in my earinstead of keeping it to myself
(17:36):
or thinking like looking at himand saying something I say in
the mic all right, let's see ifI can get this one down.
And I'm thinking I'm justtalking to Ant, but actually I'm
talking to the audience and I'mlike, oh, and they complained
about that.
Yeah, yeah.
The next day Ant called me andwas like yeah, I just got off
the phone with the weddingplanner and the bride was very
upset because you were sayingthings in the mic and I was like
(17:58):
, oh you know, and I was stilllearning, but other than that
weird shit, that isn't reallythe thing I was gonna bring up.
I would lose my voice after gigsbecause three hours straight,
or you know, we get an extrahour added on top of just
singing and not being able totruly either hear myself in
these ear things that I'd neverused the monitor in my ear
(18:20):
before.
I like are we in a venue insideand it's echoey, or we're
outside and we can't hearanything, like those first three
gigs.
I was like yo, I am losing myvoice.
I don't know if I'm going to beable to sing next week because
I've lost my voice so bad.
And so, ever since then to now,I still work to specifically
(18:43):
not hold back but not pushduring certain points of that
night, because I'm like I'mgoing to need this energy for
this is how we do it.
Or I'm going to need thisenergy for when we get to hot in
here.
I'm going to need this energyfor shout, like I want to make
sure that my voice is strongwhen we get there.
So when I'm singing, come andget your love.
I'm not going to overdo it.
(19:04):
You know what I'm saying andI'm going to sound good and I'm
going to breathe and I'm goingto make sure I articulate and
I'm going to let the audiencesing with me.
And it's this balance of wherecan I fit in, where can I take
breaks mid-show.
That's kind of the seesaw thatkeeps me very interested in
these gigs, because it is adifferent approach each gig.
(19:26):
This last gig was a primeexample of that.
I've done 24 Karat a milliontimes with y'all and I do it the
same way.
But when I first started doingit I would sing it more.
But by the time I've gotten towhere I am now, I'm usually
speaking the lyrics a lot morethan I am singing the lyrics to
save my voice.
And then, with me runningaround the room, I did a 20
(19:48):
minute yoga session that day andI was breathing all day and
actually wake up and I did mymorning routine, which I
normally don't get to do onSaturdays because I'm usually up
at three in the morning.
But I got to wake up, have mymatcha, do my walk and usually I
do a mile walk and when I dothe mile walk I'm doing a
breathing exercise where Ibreathe in and breathe in and do
(20:09):
that the entire mile to kind ofhelp create the illusion that
I'm singing for a mile straightthrough the way I'm breathing,
you know what I'm saying.
And so being able to do thatand then go and do 24 Karat
Magic and run, literally run,around the room three times
(20:30):
during the song while singing it, still, that's something that
I've been working on since I gotin a band and I'm to the place
where I'm like, oh damn, I canactually, you know, do it.
I want to pivot from music andfrom the band to your religion
(20:50):
in the way that you approacheverything now because, like you
said, this all does kind ofcombine and it's something
that's very unique being withthe band and being in a place
where you know there's timeswhere we're performing and you
have to fast and you're not ableto actually like eat or
anything, and we're all eatingand drinking, or there's moments
where you know you have to taketime away from the band and go
(21:11):
pray and find your space andyour peace within the chaos that
is our band.
When did you convert and howdid that lifestyle change?
Did it affect your music career, like, in any way?
Like, did you feel like it wassomething that you struggle with
when you started it Because itwas so different from before.
(21:31):
Just give me kind of anoverview of the beginning of
becoming a Muslim.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
So this was this past .
March was my second Ramadan andI converted, or sometimes, as
we say, reverted, which is aconcept maybe we can get into,
but that was about a year andtwo months ago.
But I think about it in my headas how many Ramadan's I've done
, which is an interestingconcept because that period of
(21:59):
time will change.
It doesn't coincide with thecalendar that the world runs on,
the Gregorian calendar, so itwill continue to shift
throughout our Gregorian year,but only a little bit each year.
So this was my second Ramadan.
Did it affect my music andmusic career?
Absolutely Two major reasons,the biggest reason being in
(22:22):
Sunni Islam in particular, whichis I don't consider myself
Sunni.
I don't like all the sectbreakdown Again, a totally
different concept maybe we'llget into.
I'm a Muslim, I don't want tosay I'm Sunni, but this is more
so.
What I've studied, so to speak,is Sunni concepts, literature
related to Sunni Islam.
(22:42):
There is a lot of evidence thatcompiles against music in
general as entertainment, as apastime, as being something that
is not permitted.
I understand that the evidenceis very overwhelming and the
reasoning is very overwhelming,and the reasoning is very
overwhelming, and the reasoningbeing because, all of a sudden I
stepped back and I looked atwhat I was doing.
I had a church gig one time andI was in church and I'm
(23:03):
thinking am I allowed to be inhere playing music for a
different religion?
And then I'm thinking about itand I said that's the least of
my worries If I'm playing inenvironments like bars or I'm
playing in environments wherethere's women dressed a
particular kind of way, there'salcohol everywhere, people are
out of their mind.
But I'm worried about oh, can Ibe playing in the church right
now?
I really have not come incontact with very many musical
(23:26):
scenarios in my life period, andespecially now that I'm aware
of it, where it's something thatactually does coincide with
spirituality as I understand it.
So I hear people talk about howmusic is a spiritual thing all
the time.
This is a very complexconversation for me.
Do I think it can be?
Yes, do I think that peoplejust say that and don't actually
think about it?
Speaker 2 (23:46):
Yes, I totally agree with you when you say that.
You know, with me I feel like Ireally listen to music, if that
makes sense.
Like people sit down and belike, oh, I have these playlists
and I do this, and I'll befeeling like we as a generation
and as a culture zone out mostof the time.
You know.
(24:06):
So when a lot of people arelistening to music, they're
doing stuff.
They're not even really payingattention to the music but, like
for me, it's really incredibleto hear every element of a song
and when you talk to certainpeople who just want to start
conversation and they're justlike you know, I kind of had
this out of body experience whenI was hearing the song and this
and that it's just like you'refull of shit, dude.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
You know what I'm saying.
Well, and they may have, but myquestion is was that a good
thing?
What did that produce, otherthan you felt a dopamine rush?
Yeah, I mean that's great, weall like a dopamine rush but
what did you take away from that?
Speaker 2 (24:47):
Did it make you think that you, oh, I didn't think of
anything.
What do you mean?
You didn't think of anythingwhen you were listening to the
song Problematic?
Yeah, I agree, I get that, Isee that, and that's really
interesting to take that angleon it where you're like I don't
see anything spiritual throughmusic, because I would assume,
as someone who is religious andplay normally, you would find a
(25:10):
way to correlate those twothings.
But for you to say like, oh, Idon't see it, that's interesting
.
How for you to say like, oh, Idon't see it, that's interesting
.
How do you feel that developed?
When did that start?
When did you have that momentof realization of?
I don't really connect thesetwo things?
Speaker 1 (25:22):
About the time that I was really getting into Islam.
Yeah, like even before I tookShahada, which is our public
declaration of faith Iinterestingly I guess I guess
this is okay to to talk about.
You know, it's not, it's notscary, but I sort of had like a
nervous breakdown where I hadbeen, I had been idolizing music
(25:46):
to such a degree, and musiciansat that.
And when I came out of thatbreakdown I looked back at it.
I was starting to develop thoseconcepts of like number one
musicians are just people and alot of these musicians that I
idolized were not great people.
Yes, and we talk about the good.
Can you separate the artist fromthe art?
And it's like sure you can dothat.
(26:13):
But then also, at the end ofthe day, what fruits did that
art itself actually produce thatwere beneficial to a community
of people?
Did that art indeed putpositive messages into a
community?
Did it feed a community ofpeople?
Did it cause a community ofpeople to come together and do
something positive in society,in American society especially,
we talk about how those thingshappen all of the time, but we
have to talk about it concretelyand not just like music brings
(26:35):
people together, okay, but howdoes it bring people together?
Because people coming togetheris still not a concrete concept.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
They came together and did what we came together
and brought further along whatyou and I've had this
conversation before too wherethe whole Kendrick Lamar thing
is of the.
Super Bowl and brought Drakeout with him and had some sort
of patching up.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
You know, and I don't know, that's not really for me
to get into, but I just thought,oh, that would have been a
beautiful thing.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
It would have been beautiful, but this whole
situation isn't about beingbeautiful.
Like it's gotten ugly incertain ways and you see the way
that the music has kind ofaffected both artists.
You know saying they're goingthrough a court case right now.
You know saying and people werelike raving about this.
I mean, I feel like you can seethis in other places and this
(27:31):
is kind of divergent for whatyou're saying, but it feels like
the same thing to me.
Where you hear all of this itbrings people together in this
greatness and that, but thenthey paint it in a certain light
as if it's this great thing butthen it could be very negative
to others.
A great example of that wouldbe in the NBA.
There was this big fight thathappened called the Malice in
the Palace.
It was years ago.
(27:52):
The players jumped in theaudience and were hitting fans
and stuff.
It was crazy.
It was this crazy moment andnothing about that is good.
Nothing about that is good.
No, nothing about that is good,period.
But of course we're in a worldnow where years later, people
(28:13):
can reflect and recently I justsaw an interview where dude was
like that was the greatest shitever.
Talk about how great it wasthat they did this, how they
were in the audience fighting,how great it was.
And it's like I'm not out herecalling them thugs or anything
ridiculous like that, because Ihate that they do that to nba
players who are millionaires.
These aren't thugs.
These are people who work theirass off and you just don't like
the way they wear their hair orthe way they look.
(28:34):
But what they did wasn't goodand over glorifying and making
it sound like it was somemarvelous thing that everyone
should look up to and be aboutis not OK.
And so when you bring it backto the music and the element of
this Kendrick versus Drake thing, it's like, in ways, I see why
people would idolize this.
But you know, drake said thatKendrick was a wife beater.
(28:55):
Kendrick said that Drake was apedophile.
They can't prove any of thisstuff.
They're just speaking to makeothers look bad.
And now other people arearguing about who's right, who's
wrong, arguing about if this isgood, if this is bad, and it's
like none of that is good what Ijust said.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
And none of it is relevant to any of our lives.
Yes, yes.
You know, me and my wife weretalking about something
hilarious.
We walked out the door thismorning to got coffee and
whatnot and beautiful thing, andwe brought up somebody from
that was like a reality TV star,a singer, somebody like that,
and we were trying to figure outwhat they were.
Yeah, we're like were they asinger?
Were they reality?
(29:34):
We couldn't remember and wesaid, you know, isn't it crazy?
We used to sit at home.
I don't have TV anymore, but weused to sit at home and you
would watch reality TV, youwould watch somebody else's life
.
I have my own life, but I'msitting here watching somebody
else.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
That's weird, I'm saying there's people who their
whole life is like sitting downin front of a TV playing video
games and being a war war, twosoldier, and you're talking to
your guys around the world andyou're you're in the trenches
and this is your life.
Speaker 1 (30:15):
This is what you do on the regular.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
It's like that's not reality, fake life yeah, it's
not reality at all.
But every single day you dothis, do what you do.
No beef, I get.
Everyone has to do what theylove.
And if that's what you love, Ilove singing.
So you might look at my lifeand be like you fucking weirdo
going out and singing songs andtrying to get people to look at
you all damn day and dancing andall of this bullshit.
(30:36):
It's like I get it.
I sound like a weirdo tosomeone else, but when it comes
to living your life, youshouldn't have to feel like you
have to post on Facebook everytime you take a good picture.
You shouldn't have to feel likeI have to sit down in front of
this TV to escape the world thatI live in.
You shouldn't have to, like yousaid, the spiritual moment with
(30:57):
the music, sit down and playmusic and be like all right, I
want to use this mood music tojust forget about my
responsibilities and evaporatefrom reality for a little bit.
It's like how can you findmoments to do these things and
also live your life, you know,say like, yeah, there's this.
(31:17):
This book I read and he wastalking about how monks everyone
assumed that they're just theseincredible meditators and they
know how to do it perfectly andwe just don't know what we're
doing.
When we do it, we're not doingit right.
And he said the secret tomeditation is that no one is
able to truly block anything outof their brain.
(31:38):
The idea is they've done it solong that they understand that
it's okay to let go.
So when you have a thought andyou're in this peaceful state,
they're able to hear it,recognize that thought and let
it go.
That's why they're able to stayinto that state and seem like
they're more focused than peoplearound you.
(31:59):
And the other day we were doingyoga at the venue.
Everyone came in and you knowour band Aunt them were laughing
.
They were like y'all breathinghard, this and that, like
talking crazy about all of us.
I would even say something yeah, exactly.
And Ben wasn't able to likejust do it.
Ben was like talking whiledoing it and I heard everything,
(32:20):
I witnessed everything.
But I was like just do it.
Ben was like talking whiledoing it and I heard everything,
I I witnessed everything.
But I was like okay, this is agood exercise to focus.
I'm doing this for a specificreason.
I'm not doing this for peopleto see me.
I'm not doing this for peopleto think, oh, he's so great.
I'm not even telling this story.
For people to think, oh, lookhow I'm telling this because
(32:41):
this is just my experience.
And I was going through thisand I was hearing it and I was
like, okay, but I'm breathing,so continue to breathe.
I hear it.
Okay, keep breathing.
Okay, next movement Keepbreathing, hear it, keep
breathing.
And if someone from the outsidenot knowing me saw that they
more likely would be like, andif someone from the outside not
knowing me saw that they morethan likely would be like, oh,
(33:02):
he was so zenned out, he blockedit all out, he didn't care.
And it was like no, I didn'tblock anything out, I heard
everything.
I was there for all of themoments.
I was irritated in my headabout the stuff, but then I let
that shit go and just kept onmoving.
You know what I'm saying,because that's life.
So having these moments whereyou feel like you have to just
(33:22):
completely eliminate yourselffrom reality is very frustrating
.
Because what happens when youcome back to reality?
What work did you do duringthat time?
You weren't participating,nothing, and so many people
assume that that's the best wayto work through problems and
it's like no, you got to bewilling to work during those
(33:45):
hard times on this shit.
How can you let it go?
Or how can you take it andtotally have that flow through
your body and then let it flowout of your body?
How do you work on that?
And it just takes a lot ofself-reflection understanding
your mental state, understandingwhat bothers you, why it
bothers you, what can you dodifferently to maybe not let it
(34:08):
bother you anymore?
You know.
Speaker 1 (34:09):
Yeah, I almost venture to say when people refer
to something being spiritual orspiritual matter, spiritual
practice if there isn't apractical application wrapped up
in that somewhere, I struggleto see how it's spiritual.
So in Islam, we pray five timesa day.
I've been doing this for anentire year.
Sometimes I don't want to do it, that's the honest truth.
(34:30):
Sometimes I love it, but from aspiritual standpoint, what I
would say is we believe thatwhat we're doing is trying to
invoke the mercy of Allah, ofGod, into our lives each time we
do it.
From a practical standpoint,what it does to go and interrupt
what I'm doing five times a dayto wake me up in the morning,
to stop work, to leave it's areminder that this is who I am
(34:55):
and this is what I abide by.
And so when I leave that and Igo back to doing the regular
stuff I'm doing, how could I docertain things that I used to do
, having just done that, havingjust entered a space where my
brain is supposed to be totallyfocused on higher things and on
God, and then I turn around andthen go right back to doing
(35:15):
something filthy, as we wouldsay, and it's like.
So that's the practicalapplication of it and otherwise,
if there wasn't, and it's like,so that's the practical
application of it and you knowotherwise, if it was, if there
wasn't, and I was like this is aspiritual thing for me, you say
, okay, but how?
To my brain?
That doesn't make too muchsense Not to put judgment on
other people if they have aspiritual practice that doesn't
have a practical application.
But I would just, I would begthe question.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
That's important for you and the people around you,
and I see it often.
Just yesterday I was talking toa friend.
They were telling me about thislast work venture that they had
and how this last work ventureis shaping the way that they're
going to move forward.
They're more than likely notgoing to do the things in the
field that they're traininganymore because it has been very
(35:57):
frustrating, hard and they'vebeen kind of getting hit with
reality left and right, noticingthat there isn't a lot of stuff
fighting for them and they'renot willing to fight for this
field anymore.
And they were talking to meabout a person who had came to
them and bought up this veryweird thing.
(36:17):
They said that this environmentthat they were working in was
very misogynistic and theydidn't enjoy it and it was a
female.
And my friend was like whatexactly happened?
I felt like it was like I feltlike we were pretty open and we
were looking now what could wehave done to make it better for
you?
Because I'm sorry if I was theperson that affected you.
(36:38):
And the person was like no, youweren't, but it was just.
That was just the vibethroughout.
He was like okay, what examplesdo you have what happened and
they were like I just it wasjust the way I felt it was the
vibe.
It was the vibe.
And there are times I've been inarguments where someone tried
to get me to emphasize things.
And the reason why I wasn'table to emphasize it because
(36:58):
mentally I knew the personwasn't trying to hear what I was
saying.
They were trying to find a wayto deflect and flip what I was
saying and manipulate my visualinstead of actually hearing me
out.
So it was hard for me to finishthat conversation because I was
like you're not, like you'renot asking me this for the right
reasons.
But in this situation he wasasking them for the right
(37:19):
reasons.
He was like I really do want tohelp, I really do want to
change, I really do want to makethings better.
And they didn't really have anyconcrete evidence.
They were just saying stuff to,in my opinion, more than likely
, manipulate them and make themfeel bad or try to get them on
their side so that they can goto someone else and flip the
switch again.
(37:40):
And it's just like this wholecrazy thing that could collapse
all around and everybody will beaffected.
And it's like there's no logichere, there's no plan.
There's no, like you said,there's nothing practical being
used.
This is just someone who morelikely doesn't have the proper
(38:00):
experience, doesn't have theproper work ethic to even be in
this situation, trying to find away to make it seem like they
are okay in this situation.
You know what I'm saying.
It is like this whole thing isTrump.
The moment that you ask themwhat actually is going on and
they're like, oh, I'm not goingto answer that question, what do
(38:22):
you mean?
You know what I'm saying?
I feel like that's a constantthing that we deal with in life.
That's why we're in the crapthat we're in as a society,
because we're dealing withpeople who aren't willing to
explain themselves.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
Yeah, it's frustrating and it's twisted and
that gets dark real fast.
Speaker 2 (38:43):
I'm not going to take away from the show too much.
I just wanted to make sure Ijumped in here and shouted out
my guy Scott.
I appreciate him for being onthe show.
He isn't really the type ofperson that shares too much with
the world in general when itcomes to his family and his
emotions.
I just appreciate him beingvulnerable and coming on the
show and actually speaking truthand just hanging out.
(39:04):
It's always good to see him.
I'm looking forward to moreperformances together and more
shows and gigs and all that jazz.
He's a wonderful saxophoneplayer.
He's a great friend, anincredible person, and I'm very
happy that he's getting sometime with his wife to actually
relax.
But he's already back togigging now.
So this is short-lived.
(39:25):
He was out for a bit, but thesecond he could get back to it
he jumped back on the horn and Icouldn't be more happy for him.
So shout-out to Scott.
I hope you all are enjoying theshow.
Please make sure to gosubscribe, follow the podcast,
share the podcast, telleverybody about it.
A lot of people have beencoming to me about different
topics.
I'm excited to put togethersome new shows and the rest of
(39:47):
the season is going to be very,very fun.
So I hope y'all stick alongwith us and, once again, thank
you.
Emotion.
Emotion is something thatdrives all of us, something that
pushes all of us, and musicemotion pushes you through music
and how you portray the song,how you do the song.
(40:08):
If I do the way you looktonight, tonight, tomorrow and
the day after, there are threedifferent ways.
I could sing that song with thesame lyrics but portray it with
different emotion.
When it comes to religion andtrying to be more disciplined,
that's my word of the year.
My theme of the year has beendiscipline.
(40:29):
I want to be more disciplinedin the way I live and the way I
approach my life, and this yearhas been difficult because I
started off strong.
Then there was moments where Iwas having some trouble within
my family and emotionally notable to really comprehend what
was happening around me, and somy discipline around all of that
kind of slipped, and I'm slowlygetting back to how I was at
(40:52):
the beginning of the year.
I'm still hitting my yoga, I'mstill doing my breathing
exercises, I'm still writing,I'm still creating, I'm still
adding more to my plate so thatI can continue to grow.
I love to hear this too.
I appreciate it.
I appreciate it, but it'simportant for me and emotionally
, I think I am in a greatheadspace now because I am
(41:14):
starting to commit more to thediscipline and I'm not doing it
for any other reason, but for me.
I'm not doing it for any otherreason but for me.
I'm not doing it for anyoneelse.
My wife is benefited from it.
People in my life are benefitedfrom it, because I'm looking at
me and saying what can I do tomake sure I'm good, so that I
can affect the world and thisand that For you.
(41:35):
When you think about yourcareer musically, when you think
about even the injury thatyou're going through right now
that is preventing you fromperforming music and doing
different things, when you thinkabout your religion and you
think about the way that youapproach life, because of that,
emotionally, where do you thinkyou are?
Oh, that's, that's so difficult.
(41:55):
I understand, I understand.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (42:00):
To quantify emotion, or even.
You know, like I said before, Ihave much conflict about
playing music, yeah, and stilldo, and wonder if this isn't a
period to reflect upon that.
Lately, in all honesty, playingmusic has just been something
(42:22):
that I love to do, just to bereal as can be.
It's usually about me and italso brings about a beauty of
being able to hang out withpeople that I love.
In almost any musical scenariothat I'm in, as of late as of
the past year or two, I'm alwayssurrounded by people that I
(42:43):
love being around.
So I love the camaraderie of it.
We all love the feeling ofsomebody saying, oh man, that
music, it touched me.
Or man, I love that music.
That's a wonderful thing, butit's also great to have touched
somebody else again.
I don't know what I did forthem, but it makes me feel good.
I think that's the differenceof where I'm at now versus where
(43:05):
I used to be.
It used to be like, oh well,I'm really doing good out here
playing music.
I don't know what good I'mdoing playing music other than I
love to do it.
I love to watch other peoplelove to do it.
I love to listen to it.
I love the camaraderie.
Emotionally I'm upset that Ican't play, but that's kind of
(43:33):
it.
I'm still at an odd point withmusic and in my prayers I
constantly ask like, am Isupposed to be doing this?
Is this serving a purpose in mylife?
Is it serving a purpose inother people's lives?
Is it something that I can justenjoy and make some money on
the side doing?
Because I'm not sure if I wouldever at this point want it to
(43:56):
consume my life.
You know that my day job is Icut down trees and that's the
way I make money and I love todo that as well and that serves
the purpose of I make money.
I have a day job and musicserves the purpose of bringing
me joy and bringing me somemoney.
If that became my main sourceof income, I would still need
(44:20):
something else in my life toserve a greater purpose.
Music can't be the end all beall For me.
It can't.
Speaker 2 (44:30):
I read this book and they were very specific about
knowing your purpose and beingable to approach your purpose
within your relationship, tomove forward positively in your
relationship and for me.
I had been working on what ismy purpose since January and
(44:51):
Adrian and I would work throughthis worksheet and kind of get
our heads right and I finallygot to a place where I think I
was the most happy creativelyright after college, where I was
creating opportunities, I wasdoing shows, I was producing
(45:11):
albums, I was writing newmaterial and going out and
hiring artists to work with meand we were consistently doing
stuff.
I'm still doing that.
I still do the jam and stillput shows together.
But slowly but surely over theyears I've kind of gotten bitten
(45:34):
by the production and theproducer bug and each time I
produce something myself it getsa little bit more difficult for
me to want to produce somethingafterwards because everything
is just so difficult workingwith certain people, working
with venues, venues trying tounderpay you, people not paying
(45:58):
attention to the words in yourcontracts and trying to pay you
too late, not willing to pay you, people not paying attention to
the words in your contracts andtrying to pay you too late, not
willing to pay you the properamount, looking at you like
you're some type of you know.
Why should we pay you fullprice?
You're not.
You know, bruno Mars, you know,yeah.
But with that being said, thebest me was the person who was
(46:19):
creating opportunities forothers.
I feel like, and I feel like mypurpose is creating media,
podcast shows, musicals, music,anything, creating stuff, making
opportunities where I'm hiringartists to do what they love to
(46:41):
do.
That's my purpose, I think, iscreating opportunities, which is
kind of interesting that I'vegotten to that place, because
it's like does that mean I'llever profit from that?
Does that mean that I'll alwaysbe the one constantly in the
back?
Will I be underappreciated?
Will I be creatingopportunities for people and
(47:01):
then wake up one day and it'slike all these people are doing
so well and I'm just kind ofhere trying.
Still, I don't know, but Itruly think that's my purpose is
to create opportunities.
If you were to word it, do youknow that what you would say
your purpose is right now?
Speaker 1 (47:22):
I'll say what has been shown to me as of recent
long-term, I'm not sure.
As of recent, my bigger purposehas been centered around family
.
Yeah, me as a husband, as a son, as a brother all those things
have become incredibly importantto me, more important than they
were previously.
(47:42):
Yeah, like those types ofthings are just so much more
important to me, more importantthan they were previously.
Yeah, like those types ofthings are just so much more
important to me than than mydesire to play music or my
desire to do it could beanything, anything that's,
that's, you know, enjoyable thatI'm like, oh, this is such a
big part of my life, but it'slike those things are bigger.
Yeah, I think there's a lot ofgeneral purposes, like just like
what we've talked about, likeaffecting people positively, but
(48:05):
affecting people positively byshowing them that my particular
lifestyle and this even comesdown.
I'll tell you one thing thatI've watched myself affect other
people positively is like mydiet.
Yeah, it's like the way youknow, I'm extremely regimented
and disciplined, like in my mydiet and my job is exercise, so
I stay in good shape.
(48:26):
I'm a big advocate for thosethings, and so you know if I, if
I watch somebody else beaffected by that, if they see
how it's playing out in my lifeand they they think, well, yeah,
I'm, I'm tired all the time orI'm not, you know, I'm, I'm
having health difficulties orwhatever it's like.
If I affect somebody positivelyin that way, I think that's it,
and it doesn't always involvegetting in somebody's face and
(48:49):
telling them what they should bedoing.
Speaker 3 (48:54):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (50:23):
This is a little ditty that we did at one of our
recent jam sessions.
Scott always comes out andplays sax and I do a jam session
at JB's Record Lounge everymonth here in Atlanta.
I try to do it the first Fridayof every month and this was
just a good time.
They're always swinging hardand I love doing this one.
But if you want to check me outfor more of my music and all
(50:45):
the stuff that I have on everyplatform, just go listen to my
music anywhere album music,spotify, amazon it's there.
You can check me out for moreinformation at donlamorecom,
where you can get anything andeverything.
Donlamore, you know what I love?
Every morning, I do a walk inthe morning and it's like a mile
(51:10):
.
I talked about that earlier inthe pod.
Recently I've added a newelement to it where, instead of
like listening to a podcast orlistening to like some you know,
kendrick or hip hop or anylyrics, I've been playing just
instrumental jazz.
That way, I don't have anythinglike that I have to sing along
(51:30):
to.
I don't have anything that Ihave to like hear.
I could just enjoy the music,hear the instrumentation and
focus on my breathing.
So I've been listening to a lotof different artists, but the
one that I'm going to say I'm inlove with right now.
It's so simple, but this jazzpianist, bg Adair.
(51:52):
Okay, I know the name yeah, thatI try to approach certain songs
.
I've never been the type to doa bunch of runs.
I've never been the type toexaggerate anything too much.
I like to be very simple and Ilike to emphasize the lyrics,
(52:16):
and so the way that BG plays thepiano does that, and it's
really enjoyable to hear her dostandards and different stuff
that I just love.
There's a cover of the Way youLook Tonight, or they Can't Take
that Away From Me the Gershwintune that I just every day I'm
(52:36):
like, ah, love this.
And that's kind of been thepast couple of days.
I've listened to that.
I've done some Miles Davis,I've done a whole bunch of
different instrument-focusedjazz, but that's what I'm loving
right now.
How about you?
You?
Speaker 1 (52:49):
know what I love is this time of year.
This is my favorite time ofyear.
It's springtime.
I was a spring baby.
Everything is blooming.
I love being outside watchingthe trees and the flowers, and
the air feels so good, and Iknow that some people hate the
pollen it doesn't bother me andgoing outside and there's
(53:10):
sunshine and there's a littlebit of rain every once in a
while as well.
It's just absolutely myfavorite time of year.
Speaker 2 (53:19):
All right, man.
We made it to the final segmentof the night.
Speaker 1 (53:44):
We've spoken about everything that we want to speak
about.
We've touched every topic.
We want to.
All I want like a podcast.
I think you have a verypositive emotional effect on
people and you're a verypositive person as well.
Try, Even when me and you havehad a conversation about
something like we'retroubleshooting something, it's
not extremely negative.
You have such a way that youapproach stuff.
I love it, man.
I love it.
(54:04):
It's something to look up to.
Speaker 2 (54:06):
I appreciate you, man .
Cheers to you once again.
Thank you for coming out.
I'm going, man.
Yeah, I want to thank you forlistening to the Black man
Talking Emotions podcast.
The opening quote.
Credit goes to Amit Ray andshout out to my guy, scott, for
(54:28):
being on the pod.
Follow Scott at ScottBoxunderscore E on Instagram.
Please subscribe to the podcast, share the podcast and give us
a good rating Five stars, please.
And thank you.
You can support the show byclicking the link at the bottom
of the episode description.
Also, tell me your plans forthis coming year.
(54:49):
We should collab.
If you liked this episode, youshould check out overcoming
challenges and embracing familylife with benjamin stevens.
That's a previous episode thatI did with another member from
my band, big bling and the funkmachine, and it was all about
family and music and beingmarried and so much more, and go
check that out.
Follow me at D O M underscore LA M O U R on Instagram or at
(55:13):
Dom Lamorecom.
I'm Dom Lamore.
Much love, thank you.
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