Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hey, Dallas.
Yes.
Bro, we had those episodes. I had Temple
of Doom. I had Yeah. Suburban Command. Where
where are they? Like, all the They're they're
in the database server. No. All the all
the databases.
But Like, seriously, all all we have like,
everything from BloodSport to now is gone. What
(00:20):
the crap? Something's eating
What's up the window, John? It's like it's
like a giant spaceship, is it? Affix itself
space station.
What is that? Why is it crawling through
the ship?
Move. Get out the way. What is happening?
Do we does the federation
not pay for exterminators?
I don't know what's happening here. There's gotta
(00:42):
be a let me go check the files.
There's Glix, you cheap garbage.
What? I found something. It's a in case
of emergency from Kevin. It's a movie? Here,
hold this box for me. It says, in
case of emergency of something eating your files,
feed it this. What?
You know? Prevail yourself to discover a world
(01:03):
of terrible movies.
High above the planet Geekery, a group of
intrepid explorers
hover over the dangerous planet in their fabulous
super orbital spacecraft.
Their mission, to conduct a complete analysis of
movies known throughout the universe as Terrible.
Okay. Okay.
So grab your space popcorn, grab your freeze
(01:24):
dried ice cream, and join us for today's
mission of discovery and wonder.
Are these movies better than the galaxy thinks?
Or do they really belong
on the bottom shelf?
Hello, movie lovers and movieators. Welcome to the
bottom shelf, a place where every movie has
a place on
(01:45):
the shelf. My name is Dallas. I'm so
glad to have you guys with us. This
is an extension of Geek Devotion on the
show from Motor Geeks. Our devoting to let
you know you're loved. If you wanna watch
Pass the Boat knows this, we love you.
We care about you. There is a plan
and purpose for your life. And ladies and
gentlemen,
there is a giant
creature sucking the life out of everything I
love.
Dallas, my name is John. Just stop. Oh,
I'm sorry. Hey, John. How's it going? Alright.
(02:07):
There you go.
John? We have a problem. Yeah. We do.
We have to watch this movie. Yeah. So,
apparently, it's this creature's eating the data out
of our computers, and we have to feed
it some sort of movie. What is this
movie, John? What does the box say? It's
War of the Worlds. This can't be bad.
It's War of the Worlds. Well, I it's
not Here. Let me read the box. Give
(02:27):
this here. Give me give me the box.
It said you're having a coughing fit.
I'm sorry. It's just it smells like doo
doo.
Oh, man. Oh, why is it sticky? Alright.
The back of the box says,
a colossal
invasion of Earth is coming
in this
off kilter take on the legendary
novel of the same name
(02:48):
filled with present day themes
of technology,
government surveillance, and privacy. Did chat GBT write
this? What is happening? I mean,
no. Because then that would be chat GBT
writing
about itself.
I don't know. What And no one would
be foolish enough to make AI self aware.
Right? No. Never. Pick up the database and
(03:09):
tell us what this movie is really about.
Okay.
Once upon a time in the project in
the projects room
project room
of Rich Lee,
he found himself pushing the weight of
the COVID era. He thought it might be
a good I yeah. Let's try this again
(03:29):
because words are hard.
He thought it would be a good day
to say hello to the cinema world with
a remake of the classic HG Wells property,
War of the Worlds.
It was no summer vacation
as he brought in Ice Cube who wished
he had taken his mother advice and go
to church rather than work with Ava Longoria
(03:51):
and
the color blind Clark Gregg in this Zoom
inspired film that made
$100
bill, y'all. Though
it was going to be
a great CIA deep state commentary,
instead,
it didn't say it didn't stay true to
the game
and was a wicked rendition of a sci
(04:14):
fi classic leaving audiences going. Thank god it's
over. Bro, did you intentionally slip in a
bunch of ice cube references through that?
Yeah.
I'm sitting here catching I'm sitting here catching
all these ice cube song titles and while
I'm reading this, for those y'all in listener
land, Dallas wrote that intro movie intro to
(04:36):
the movie, and this is my first time
reading it, or if you couldn't tell.
And Ice Cube's, like, one of my favorite
rappers. And I'm sitting here seeing all these
references, and I'm like, I'm not sure if
this is intentional. I don't know if ice
if Dallas knows Ice Cube like that.
I don't. I had a window open with
all the songs listed. Oh, okay.
(04:57):
I wanted to do that for you because
I knew you would appreciate it. Hey. Well,
I did. I caught all of that. I
was actually pretty impressed with throwing in Wicked
in there because that's, that's a little bit
more of a deep cut.
Oh my gosh. Alright. So we're reviewing a
movie, as you guys can tell. It's not
gonna be pretty, apparently.
John, do we have any trivia on this
(05:18):
this film?
I mean,
we have some in the database, but some
some of these read more like excuses than
they do trivia. But let's let's
let's try, shall we? Alright.
Okay. Says here first mentioned in 2020
as an untitled
Beckmamm
bro, how do you say dude's name?
(05:38):
Beckmama Tov
feature starring Ice Cube for Universal.
It resurfaced
in July 2025 when it was released straight
to streaming
as a free movie on Amazon Prime. It
was not even screened for critics.
Universal were sold on the movie by a
pitch from Beck Mametov,
(06:00):
who had acted as producer on successful films
in this format
where he explained it would allow them to
sell it as a high budget science fiction
movie, but produce it for the cost of
a cheap TV thriller.
Interesting.
The character of William Radford was originally written
to be a paraplegic to fit the with
the themes of COVID and people being glued
(06:22):
to their screens,
but the director was impressed by the intensity
of ice cubes chair throwing that he rewrote
the character
to match.
So if you can throw a chair in
Hollywood, you can change a script. So
Tom Cruise in every single Mission Impossible movie?
I mean, after Homeboy jumped up on Oprah's
(06:44):
chairs, he, you know, he hasn't gone without
a paycheck. I'm just saying. That's true. Filmed
in the 2020
under COVID
nineteen protocols.
Alright.
That that that I'm not sure if that's
a selling point, guys.
And then
finally,
one of the names
of Williams' teams plays
(07:06):
teams display is
Horson g Wells,
an homage to Orson Wells and HG Wells
because I don't know how to spell that.
I yeah. I don't. I don't.
Alright. Well, through the magic of podcasting, we
have community outreach, and we had one person
reach out and say this.
Oh, boy.
(07:28):
I saw the trailer and fearfully ran away.
You guys ran towards it
like firefighters to an inferno. You have my
eternal gratitude.
Jayus Earls. It is a thankless job, sir,
but we do this for the community.
We do this for you guys.
Alright.
John,
what are your expectations
for this film? To be honest,
(07:50):
when I first heard about this, I first
I didn't even know this movie was a
thing. You know? Time I even heard about
this movie was when I pulled up YouTube
one day, and
I saw the poster on some reactors
channel
talking about this movie, and it said ice
cube, war of the worlds. And I kinda
(08:10):
chortled to myself because that combination didn't make
sense.
But then I started seeing more people
posting stuff about it. So I watched one
of the reactors, and I said Oh. Oh.
So I don't have high expectations for this.
Like, I was hearing reactions to it long
before I I mean, that like, the reactions
(08:33):
I've been hearing towards it were my first
indication that this movie even existed. So Wow.
Yeah.
Cool.
My expectations Yeah. How about you? Well, first
off, please note, I'm a fan, the IP
of War of the Worlds.
I read the book
years ago when I was a wee lad.
(08:54):
The
the original the audio drama
is,
to me, a historical
phenomenon.
It is fascinating what took place
when the audio drama hit the airwaves and
the
the panic that ensued as the story was
unfolded. And if you go back and listen
to the actual audio drama, which you can
(09:15):
find in places like YouTube and whatnot, it's
fascinating. It really is fascinating to listen to.
And if you put yourself in the mindset
of a person that age when they're, like,
they're just flipping on the radio, and they're
listening to it, and they're missing the constant
announcement saying, this is a fictional story. You
can get the vibe of why this was
crazy for people. I like the movie, the
(09:35):
from the sixties or not sixties, like, the
fifties, whatever it was. That was cool. There
hasn't been a lot of things done wrecked
with this in the future. But when I
saw it, I was like, okay. Cool. I
wanna watch this. I wanna watch this. And
I think Celeste was recording an episode of
We Read Allegedly when I saw it. And
I almost watched it, and I was like,
no. I'm gonna wait for Celeste.
So I'm sure she was glad that you
(09:56):
waited for her. Oh, yeah. Well, here's the
because cards on the table before the I
watched it. So my expectations this round is
not much better than after I watched it
the first time. Yeah.
Alright. Those are my expectations.
So
yeah. So those are our expectations. Wanna hear
from you guys if you're listening.
So bleak, bro. I'm not gonna lie.
(10:17):
Wanna know what your expectations are, audience,
about this film. The of I would love
to have the experience take place. Pause this
podcast.
Go watch this. It's on Amazon Prime. It
may be on YouTube somewhere. I don't know.
But I know it's on Amazon Prime. Come
back. For God's sakes, don't spend money to
watch it. No. Make sure you have Prime
(10:38):
membership. But pause this. Send us a message.
Hit us up in the Geek Devotions Discord
or on the bottom shelf social media platforms.
We're on Facebook, and we're on Instagram. And
let us know your expectations before you watch
it, and then come back and enjoy the
experience with us as we review it. John,
are you ready
for this
hair raising,
(10:58):
exciting
adventure we're about to go on? I mean,
are we ever ready for anything ever? I'm
gonna have toms.
Dear listeners,
this is your opportunity to escape. Our crew
has just entered into the media projection chamber.
What horrors and madness that they consume are
unknown.
Their mental state upon their return
(11:20):
is unknown.
You have been warned.
So that was a movie.
You remember in
Ghostbuster
not Ghostbusters. In Super Mario Brothers three
when you would go to the toad house,
and
it was basically like a giant random number
generator.
Yeah. And, you know, you'd have to hit
(11:41):
the box and whatever
you hit, like, you got, but it was,
like, constantly just cycling through different things. Yes.
That's how I feel about this movie right
now.
Does that make
sense? Like, I it's like at any given
moment,
I feel something different about this movie. I
(12:02):
understand that. Well, ladies and gentlemen, if you're
new to the show, you're joining us as
we relaunch the show. Typically, what we do
is we give our spoil free thoughts,
and then we have a little moment, and
we give our spoiled thoughts. So here in
a second, we're about to explain to you
some things about the that we like, didn't
like. John just told you one thought. John,
(12:22):
I wanna share this with you. I busted
this out today. This is the birthday gift
my sister gave me, which was a binder
that you can't see on screen. Not a
binder. It's a literal
logbook for watching TV and films.
And so I have a whole section of
notes,
opinions, all kinds of stuff. So,
shout out to Demara for helping me stay
(12:43):
focused with the bottom shelf today. John, what
are your spoil free thoughts
on the film?
Stock footage.
Holy crap. First thing I have listed down
here is, are they using Istock videos?
Stock footage. This is like stock footage the
movie.
Like, for reals, like,
are were they trying to get a sponsorship
(13:05):
from one of those other stock video places
out there? I don't know. I made I
made a comment to you when we were
watching this movie, and I I I had
said, like, this is like, I had the
biggest thought. Like, this was supposed to be
a war of the world's remake
or reenvisioning,
but, honestly, it watches a lot more like
(13:25):
a remake or a modern retelling of plan
nine from outer space.
That is an accurate description.
Because there's a whole lot of react to
this thing off camera,
and then show stock footage.
One of the worst things about this film
is the entire time, again, it's through for
context, when you're watching this film, guys,
(13:47):
Ice Cube
is basically
watching
his monitor,
and it's on team viewer,
Zoom, and
something else, Microsoft
Teams.
And
at one he's wearing glasses. At one point
in time, he's reacting something terrifying in one
of the windows on a screen, and you
(14:08):
the reflection of the green screen is still
in his eyeglasses.
I mean,
you know,
for me, Ice Cube's the GOAT. Right? Like,
he's he he's a rap legend in my
book. Always has been, always will be. Totally
respect him. And it's it it it's because
it's Ice Cube
that I can't see him as a computer
(14:30):
hacker
extraordinaire.
Like, I'm sorry, Cube. I it's nothing on
you, man. I think you're a smart guy.
I've listened to a lot of your lyrics.
I've gotten a lot of wisdom from them,
but
there was some hacker doo doo that fell
out of your mouth in this movie, bro.
And
it you're It's not his he was playing
(14:50):
the script that was given to him. I
know. But, like, he he put it out
in the most unbelievable way too. Like, a
lot of the lines that were a lot
of the lines felt like they were ADR
and delivered flat, I mean, if I'm being
honest. Yeah. Yeah. Definitely. Now let's be fair
with that.
As we said, this was COVID years following
(15:10):
COVID restrictions, meaning
there was no acting with other people. It
was all
spliced together. I mean that. Like, I was
a I was a voice actor in Supersonic
Pod comics, and
if anybody was a part of that experience
when that happened, he voice acted together in
that either. That was all pieced together outside
(15:32):
of that. So, like, I I can under
I have a special appreciation for how this
movie was probably pieced together.
Mhmm. But I think it could have been
done better because well, like, there and, maybe
I'm tipping my hand a little bit here,
but there is a lot of stuff that
I think that the supersonic crew probably could
have done
better.
(15:54):
Yeah. Yeah. You're not wrong there, John. Speaking
of the acting, there was a inconsistency in
things as far as tone throughout the entirety
of the film. Like, there were moments where
it's like like, they were trying to be
funny, and then they weren't. And then
and just and then, like, timing timing was
thrown off throughout the entirety of the film.
There are moments that, like, they're giving you
(16:15):
so much information. Like, there's no way this
is real time. Because, like, for like, the
film is meant to be real time. Mhmm.
But then they're giving you things. I'm like,
there's this isn't real time. Like, there's no
way that
major military operations are rolling out this quickly
or it's I'd had the same thought. Like,
there were stuff that was happening that that
that was supposed to be, like, twenty minutes
(16:35):
apart, and there's other stuff that is just
like this like, a couple hours later, and
it's just like like, the concept of time
goes out. Like, time is an abstract concept
in this movie. Yeah. Yeah. And we'll get
into some of that here in a little
bit, but it was just
the timing was bad. It was written by
it was written by a dog who was
homesick for their owner.
(16:58):
That's a great way to put it.
That is legitimately a great way to put
it.
Oh my gosh, dude.
I have thoughts,
and I have one thought that's spoil free,
but I'm gonna save it for my review
at the end. Okay. I don't know if
I could talk much more about this film
(17:19):
and not be spoiler.
So do you have anything else you wanna
add? I mean, nothing that I couldn't probably
say on the spoiler side of things to
free things up for conversation.
Let's let's jump over there. Alright.
Ladies and gents,
the spoiler section.
Every time I hear that bumper, I expect
Celeste to start singing It Had to Be
You.
(17:40):
Buddy.
Oh, man. Alright. So
laying out the spoiler side of things, throughout
the entirety of film, ISQ plays a CIA
operative
who's in charge of, like, this supercomputer.
And, basically, if you are you familiar with
purchase of interest, John? Yeah. It's basically that,
where, basically, he has access to everybody's digital
devices, and he's tracking people, he's cataloging people.
(18:02):
Yeah. It's it's Watch Dogs, the movie. Yeah.
And so he's doing all this.
And at the same time, there is this
subplot about this super hacker who's trying to
get information they're trying to lock down.
And there's this whole thing, and it's a
myth, but we're real active in trying to
catch this guy who's after a myth about
a super high-tech intelligence source that is out
(18:25):
there this hacker's trying to get. So that's
a subplot that happens.
At the same time, Ice Cube is
playing the grieving
absent near absentee
hyper focused father. It's weird. He's in both
at the same time. Like like, he's hyper
focused and, like, monitoring his children all the
time to, like, creepy thing. Like, he's looking
at his daughter's refrigerator
(18:45):
through her Samsung camera. He's a he's a
helicopter deadbeat.
Yeah. That's a great way to put it.
A helicopter deadbeat. Like, black hawk down, crashed,
and got back up and limped along. Like,
that's what he's doing here. And
just the again, the tone of things that
they they're hand pissing this, like, super, like,
oh, he's a hurt father, and, like, they're
trying to rebuild the relationship, while they're also,
(19:08):
like, plugging in a lot
a lot of, like, government conspiracy stuff in
there that doesn't even make sense to a
conspiracy theorist. Like, that's the entirety of the
film. You sound mad, bro. You need a
hug? A taco is what I mean. Well,
who doesn't?
I know. Right?
So I don't know, man. It's just so,
like, this past summer, I had our students
(19:29):
at my church do we did a film
school with students, and I had them do
a challenge where they had to make a
a miniseries.
And and they we spawned, like, this wheel
of genres, and they end up having to
create this is what the wheel came gave
them, a post apocalyptic
zombie
office style
show. Okay.
And they did it. And it was again,
(19:52):
these are
13 the youngest person was 12, the oldest
person was 15.
And they were they're barely learning how to
use camerawork and stuff like that, and what
they produced was better than this. As far
as storytelling
and tone Okay.
You sound mad, bro. It's just frustrating because
I'm like, why why did we resurface this
(20:12):
in 2025?
Well, here's here's the thing. Yeah. I mean,
when I was watching this movie, I started
kinda follow you down that dark rabbit trail.
I put on my plan nine from outer
space goggles
watching this movie, and this movie
has the potential to be a new
so bad it's good cult classic.
(20:34):
Like, my predict like, I I said it.
I don't remember if I was on
mic when we had set when I had
set it earlier, but I have a feeling
this move is gonna sweep the Razzies this
year. And I wish the Razzies were televised
because I'd love to watch
that. I don't know. I'm just not sure
that I'm not sure this is gonna make
that that level. You don't think you don't
think it swings back around again to so
(20:54):
bad it's good? It would have to be
a group experience type of movie for it
to be that way. Like, I don't the
concept of here's the thing that really ticks
me off. The concept of it, of all
these pieces coming together,
it's actually not a bad concept.
And what frustrates me the most is I
was going to do this. I had this
in my head already of doing something like
(21:15):
this several years ago. It was a project
I had back in my head I was
gonna do, and I never did it. And
I'm seeing it in out like this. I'm
going, this could have been better. And, again,
some of it's just I have a lot
of love for the property of HG Wells
of War of the Worlds in the execution
of it. Like, in War of the Worlds,
it's an expansive thing. This is the sixth
(21:35):
time,
and there's this whole thing where
the aliens, they succumb to
the natural habitat of Earth. They can't survive
in our planet. And it's following a guy
who's surviving this, and he's experiencing humanity
in a different way. He's growing as he
encounters different people as humanity survives.
Mhmm. This movie literally is framed within
(21:56):
an hour and a half,
but not at the same time.
And
there's the gravitas
just isn't there, and it frustrates me that
they took a wonderful piece of fiction that
was,
like, it genuinely shook people at one point
in time. Mhmm. And then they did this.
Like, Tom Cruise did better than this. Let
me ask you this, Dallas. Being as we're
(22:17):
being as we're into opinions
and really
hypotheticals
Mhmm. Do you even think that War of
the Worlds can be redone
at this point in history in any meaningful
kind of way that can
resonate with people
on a on a fresh level?
Or is it just too familiar of a
(22:38):
story to even really be done well anymore?
Because, you know, there's some there's some there's
some stories that are out there. Like, another
another good one would be invasion of the
body sn snatchers
Mhmm.
Where the story's been done so many times
that you know the story beats, and it
it is it even possible to make it
feel fresh at this point? Right. And I'm
(23:01):
with you on that conversation point Now the
fact that it has been done a lot.
I know that beats the story.
But if
how to put this? You bring somebody fresh
who's never seen has no idea about that
property,
I'm not sure they could rock with this.
The fact that it sits at a 2.5
on IMDb.
Like, it has a six on the, on
Metacritic.
(23:21):
Like, these these are some low numbers, bro.
And for the people who are out there
who aren't as familiar with Metacritic,
six,
that's six on a scale of one to
a 100. That's that's not six out of
10. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If it was six
out of 10, that's a whole another car.
We talk we've done six out of tens,
and we're like, oh, man. Like, we could
rock with it. Yeah. But just the execution
(23:43):
was rough all the way through. The way
that the even, like, the inconsistency
in the way
of the, the camera work. That was frustrating
me also. You have this moment, like, they're
running back and forth, and, like, the aliens
are, like they're dropping stuff and everything like
that. And there's this one field agent, and
she's she has her camera up, and she's
like, look at this. And, again, it was
(24:03):
already choppy the way she was going back
and forth, flipping the camera back and forth.
But then as things are hitting the fan,
it just flips back to her going, oh,
crap, and it flips back to the thing.
Like like, that's a the that shot going
back and forth is an intentional thing you
would normally do with a normal setup when
you're trying to do a third person situation,
(24:24):
but that breaks the world of what they're
doing of we're filming this on personal devices.
And, again, that's part of my frustration of
it is that you're trying to frame a
world. You're trying to frame a mindset. That's
a very cool concept, actually, of going through
everyone's personal devices using Zoom, using TeamViewer, which,
again, you can't use any of these devices
on any of these software on government facility
(24:45):
devices, but you can use WhatsApp. And, the
that's a joke for people.
The
and, again, so you had this idea, but
the way they did the camera work is,
like, they couldn't make up their mind if
they wanted to do it. I'm like, just
commit to it if they're gonna do it.
Yeah.
Really,
they they they set out to try to
make Cloverfield.
(25:07):
Yes.
And what we ended up getting was a
made for TV Amazon Prime infomercial. Yes. That
yeah.
Amazon Prime
infomercial. Yes. That
it was
literally, they saved the world by ordering a
USB on Amazon Prime.
Literally, that's how they said the world.
Jeff Bezos saves the world with his
(25:27):
air delivery.
That they no longer offer.
It just didn't make sense, John.
His product placement, my guy. There were shots
on the news where if you're to the
funny the the funniest part like, you can
tell a movie's cheap when you when this
happens, but most people will never notice because
(25:48):
you look where you're supposed to.
In the action sequences,
when you're watching things
in this movie or especially, like, when you're
seeing, like, action sequence being shown on news
feeds. Right? Mhmm.
What they do is they render
the main objects of action
with a lot of detail.
(26:09):
Like, say, for for instance, a fighter jet
and an alien
spacecraft in this movie.
Right. But if you pay attention to the
stuff that's happening around it, like the buildings
that are going past it or
just things like that,
you'll notice that they ended up showing up
without
enough motion blur.
(26:31):
And if you looked directly at them, they
looked very much much like a computer rendering
of the side of a building from a
PS two game. Like, for real, there was
a couple times where the building's moving past
the camera
truly reminded me of the building at the
end of Batman 89 where that they dropped
the Joker from. I have a literal note
(26:53):
in this book that says,
why does my PS one game look better
than some of these scenes? Like, it it
the the special effects in this movie are
so inconsistent.
Like, there's there's times where it's passable, and
then there's times where it's just like, what's
did I set a high score?
Yeah. Again, this was such a great concept,
and I won't put that out there. This
(27:13):
was a great concept, but the execution
was so sloppy.
The like you said, like, the graphics were
so inconsistent throughout the entirety of the film.
Their moms were like, okay. Alright. We can
rock with this. And in their own times,
I'm like, what are we doing? And I
and I think, like like I said, it
it's kind of a little Easter egg for
people to go back and listen to the
episode again when I had mentioned in the
(27:35):
trivia that Mhmm. Some of the points of
trivia really felt like, hey. Let me explain
rather than
bits of trivia. More specifically,
the the one where it said universal were
sold on this movie
where the guy had explained that it would
allow them to sell this as a high
budget science fiction movie, but produce it for
the cost of a cheap TV thriller. And
(27:57):
it's just like, bro,
you get what you pay for, my guy.
Exactly.
Exactly.
So So I mean, if if you learn
anything
when you first get out of college, it's
that you pick and choose what you're gonna
what you're going to pinch your pennies on.
You know? Mhmm.
I mean, you save money on you you
(28:17):
you buy cheap food. You don't buy cheap
toilet paper. You know what I mean? Exactly.
Oh my gosh, dude.
Alright. Any other spoil filled stuff?
I mean Was there anything redemptive about the
stuff? I get I've said that the storyline
was
conceptually cool. Well, I mean, it depends on
(28:37):
what you how how far you wanna take
it with redemptive. Like like I said, once
I started to appreciate it for how bad
it was,
I learned to enjoy it on that level.
But I will say there is this movie
does have one did produce one very
immersive
effect for me after it was over with
(28:59):
that
I thought was really neat, although I don't
necessarily think it was intentional on the movie
maker's part. In that, as soon as I
was done with this movie, like, I was
having a hard time remembering it. Like, the
aliens were sucking the information out of my
brain.
Alright.
(29:21):
Like, for real no. Let let me show
you Dallas. Do you remember specific scenes
in this movie? Like, if I was to
say, hey. Tell me about a specific scene
in this movie. How many of those can
you do?
Probably three or four, but parts because they
just ran together.
I think that's the other part. There was
no there was really no distinguishing between acts.
(29:42):
It just Now ran together. Now
I'm gonna ruin this one step further in
the most awesome way for you, Dallas. Okay.
If they were to program
this movie
to with to to show subtitles
and just play
midi music over the top of it so
you can't hear the voices
(30:02):
and it were to pause at the end
of each line,
this would instantly turn into one of those
anime visual novels you can buy for, like,
$3 on your PlayStation
because it's constantly the same character just sitting
there staring directly into the camera saying their
line.
It's all the cuts in there.
(30:22):
Press a to continue.
Turn the page after the beep.
I'm telling you, man. It's it's it it
it literally is a video game visual novel
is what it is. I mean, this is
wrong. Oh my gosh.
Yep. Yep. That's a thing.
Oh, I know. Like, literally
literally, if you think about it, you could
take the parts where it where it's him
(30:44):
working through his computer
desktop screen, make those the interactive
portions of the game itself,
and just leave everything else like an FMV.
And you could it would be 100%
an easy transfer into an FMV video game.
Yeah. You're not wrong.
Amazon, that's I'll I'll charge you only $60
(31:06):
for a consulting fee for that idea. I
mean, for real. Give them a call. Come
on, Amazon. Come on, Bezos.
Alright. I'm not sure I have anything else
I can add to this conversation.
It's alright. The like like I said, this
this movie is quickly being drained from my
brain. Hopefully, we'll detach this thing from our
ship here in a second. I'm gonna go
on to watch good bad movies. You know,
(31:27):
I'm still on the fence on whether or
not this movie's enjoyable
as a bad movie.
I I I can't explain this. Like, this
is the most uncomfortable I've been with. Do
I like this, or do I absolutely hate
this? I can't tell.
Wow.
Wow. Okay. Well, here we're gonna leave it.
Let's go and jump into our rating system.
(31:48):
Okay. Guys, if you're new to our show
or maybe it's been a while and you've
forgotten, the way we rate things is very
simple. We got top shelf, which is this
is I need to own this movie. I
want to physically own this thing. Middle shelf,
maybe if it's streaming, I'll watch it. Bottom
shelf, probably won't watch it ever again.
Dumpster fire is our final level.
(32:08):
I will actively try to keep people from
watching this movie. It is thrown into the
dumpster fire and burned from existence. And to
our knowledge, no film has ever
made it into this.
There are rumors of a
Avatar last Airbender movie at one point in
time, but I think that guy just lost
a production. I don't think I ever made
it. I don't think that's a thing, my
guy. Yeah. I think they were talking about
(32:30):
the TV show that they did on That's
might be it. Yeah. Yeah. Back in their,
like, 2008 era.
Alright, John. Since you're on the fence
Mhmm. I would love to hear
you talk through your rating. What are you
gonna get? Actually, while you were talking through
the rating system, I think I think I
know how to rate it. I don't know
necessarily know if I'm off the fence yet,
(32:51):
but I know how I'm gonna rate it.
Okay.
Just going purely based off of
logic,
like, like, almost like a logic diagram,
the descriptions
of the actual rating system, I would feel
the most appropriate rating I could give. This
would be a middle shell. And the reason
the reason why
(33:12):
is because
there is a part of me that wants
to watch this again
with a group of guys on a couch
and
a
bevy of junk food in front of us.
Like, get you, me, Bam, and Kevin
with a bunch of
sugary caffeinated
(33:32):
snacks
and watch this movie, I think it could
be a very
good time. But I could also see it
going sideways and being
having the the what's it called?
The opposite effect. There's a medical term for
it, but it's escaping me where
the inclusion of that many more people,
(33:52):
the include the inclusion of that many more
people might make it that much more worse.
So
yeah. But I it's a it's it's an
experience. I would be
curious to see how it panned out. So
the best I the lowest I could get
it is a middle shelf, like, legitimately.
Like, there are circumstances
by which I'm like, if those circumstances are
met, I'm going to watch this again just
(34:14):
to see what happened. Okay. Alright. So you're
given a middle shelf. Middle one. Middle shelf.
Low middle shelf. This is where I'm at.
It's a good movie Oh, no. At all.
Oh, no. That said, let me tell you
how this movie could be saved.
One It accepts Jesus as his lord and
savior?
Miss
Mystery Science Theater 3,000
could save this film.
(34:36):
And
if this had been a
web series,
if they had chopped this up into a
fascinating web series,
you get ten minutes here, ten minutes there,
break it up, create some sort of extra
lore behind
it. This that could save this movie. Mhmm.
If it wasn't for the fact that we
(34:58):
experienced an hour and a half film
in pseudo real time.
Like, I would've been okay with some of
this if I was watching a web series
and there was a break between certain things.
Because mentally, I'm going I'm watching this two
days later. It makes sense for so much
things to take place in this
span of two minutes. Mhmm. However,
we don't have it in that format.
(35:19):
But you bring up an interesting proposal of
the middle shelf if you have a crew.
So here is my proposal, John. Okay.
Let's give this a
tentative
middle shelf. Okay. And the next time we
have the opportunity
to have a group viewing, you, me,
(35:40):
Branson, whoever else, next time in because you're
coming in a couple months
to Tentatively.
Tentatively.
Next time we have opportunity to do this
together,
let's put that to the test.
Let's have a movie night where we watch
this dog water film,
and
let's see if it redeems itself.
And if not,
(36:00):
I say dumpster fire. Okay. So a tentative
middle shelf. Okay.
So I'm just going to reach up here
and tie
this.
And here. There we go. So I have
the movie hanging
about the level of where the middle shelf
would be just above the dumpster fire, so
(36:20):
it's
easy just to cut that string.
The flames are licking the plastic as we
speak. Yeah. Smell it smells like the fog
remake.
That is to my day this day, my
favorite video
that the dapper man ever put out was
him lighting that stupid fog movie on fire.
(36:41):
Oh, man. Well, ladies and gentlemen, it is
a tentative middle shelf for us here at
the bottom shelf. We want your thoughts
subject to change. We want your thoughts on
it. Reach out to us. Hit us up
in the Discord. Hit us up on social
media, Facebook, and Instagram.
That being said, ladies and gentlemen, it is
now time for
This is a weak connection.
(37:03):
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the weak connection.
This is the part where we take a
look at these terrible films and find something
redemptive
to point you back to the hope of
love and Jesus of Jesus Christ.
John, do you have a weak connection?
I do, but I'm kind of shooting from
the hip right now, Dallas.
Okay. Because it just kinda came to me
while you were just talking right this second.
(37:25):
So it's not so much a weak con
connection as an exhortation
I can pull from
this movie
and a piece of scripture that I, like,
literally, I'm just pulling out of the air,
and I can't remember the address. So maybe
if you could help me, pastor Dallas.
What's the scripture? Do things as unto the
do all things as unto the Lord.
(37:48):
I know what you're talking about. I know
what you're talking about. It is
Colossians
three twenty three through 24. Whatever you do,
work hardly as unto the Lord, not and
not for men knowing for
knowing that from the Lord, you will receive
the inheritance of your reward.
You are serving the Lord Christ.
Alright. So
I made a joke earlier when Dallas said,
(38:10):
I know what could have saved this movie.
And I said, it accepts Jesus as its
lord and savior. And that was funny. But
in the same sense, as Christians, we are
called to live to a higher standard, and
everything we do needs to be done to
the glory of God.
Now I'm not here to say that anybody
who made this movie is or is not
(38:30):
a Christian. That's none of my business. I
don't know them. What I can say is
that,
you know,
if somebody were to say that, hey.
I put I worked so hard on this
movie for the glory of God. I'd say,
I would inspect my relationship with God if
that was your intended intention to bring glory
(38:51):
because that seemed more like I did what
I felt was good enough to get this
out the door.
So if I can encourage anybody with this
movie, it would be do all things for
God's glorification
because we are the his representation
in this world. Don't put out a war
of the worlds.
Yeah. Don't do that, guys. Do things with
(39:14):
excellence. Doesn't have to be perfect, but do
things with excellence. Excellence? Yes.
Yes. I like it. Well, pastor Dallas, now
that we caught my shooting from the hip.
Yeah. So mine is coming from there was
a moment in the film where Ice Cube
was talking to his daughter, and he's basically
trying to apologize for being an absentee helicopter
parent. And, and she goes, the problem is
(39:35):
you think you can do everything. And she
goes, you can't. And that is the thing
where people we have this mindset
that everything we do, we've gotta do it
all. Like, whatever the process is in our
life, we gotta make sure that we're doing
everything because otherwise, it's not gonna get done.
But that's not really how things work. Let
me put my Bible verse here real quick.
I've lost it. Hold on one second. Okay.
(39:56):
Here we go. Psalm one twenty seven verse
one. Unless the Lord builds a house, those
who build it labor in vain.
And, it's short and sweet, but points up
the simple thing of you could put your
hands on stuff, but Lord's not in it.
He's not leading you. He's not guiding you.
He's not taking part in the process. It's
gonna be in vain. And that that's a
hard truth to accept for folks. There's a
(40:16):
lot of people like, oh, I can do
all this stuff, and you
can. I can do all things through a
verse taken out of context.
Yeah. Basically. But that verse itself, I could
do all things through Christ who empowers me.
That whole thing is talking about how
Paul's imprisoned,
and
he's talking about he can handle whatever he
can handle the hard times because A better
translation says, I can endure all things through
(40:39):
Christ who strengthens me. Exactly.
And so but this is hope reliance on
the Lord. And, again, in the movie, Ice
Cube, he's trying to do it all and
to take care of his family. And, again,
I appreciate the intentions,
but he's he's stepping out on things he
shouldn't be stepping out into. And with whatever
you have happen in your life, you need
to present it to the Lord. You need
to give him the opportunity to guide it.
(41:00):
And it I understand it gets frustrating because
you're like, well, it's not the way I
want it, though, or it's like it's not
the way you expected.
We earlier tonight, we had our play and
pray on the Twitch and YouTube channel, and
we were actually talking about this. And John
the Baptist came to Jesus, and he's like,
hey. Are you really the Messiah? Because he's
been in jail for a year, and he
was expecting Jesus to start overthrowing the government
a year ago. And Jesus is like, look
(41:22):
at what's taking place. Mhmm. And he's just
correcting his views. Like, it's not the way
you expected it to, but you have to
trust that I'm gonna handle it the way
it needs to be handled, and it will
be better. And so it's a hard lesson.
It's a hard thing to take it, and
it sucks at times. Because You're like, I
want this now, or you're like, this really
hurts right now. But you have to trust
the process that he's walking
(41:44):
all the way through.
That is my weak connection.
Alright. Alright. Well, how about you guys out
there in listener land? Do you have some
thoughts on this? Please
share them with us
at the Geek Devotions
Facebook group, the Devoted Geeks.
Show the geek life. Devoted Geek Life. I
(42:06):
apologize. I am bad at that. I'd I'm
not in there as much as I used
to be because I'm busy hanging out over
on the Geek Devotions Discord
Word. Where I am a moderator and generate
plenty of content. So come join us, hang
out,
talk to us about movies,
maybe request some movies because our time off
(42:26):
has completely derailed our previous plans for this
year. So right now Shot it in the
foot. Right now, our schedule
is pretty wide open. So Hey. Do you
wanna do Gumby? That's what Cellcast is doing
right now. I'm good. Cellcast can just keep
Gumbo over there by himself.
But that being said, we wanna thank you
so much
(42:47):
for hanging out with us. Go like, rate,
and subscribe on whatever platform you are listening
to us on.
Yeah. Check out geekdevotions.com.
That is where our home on the worldwide
webs,
and you can find other
fantastic
and articles
about that geeky stuff that you like. And
(43:09):
who knows? You might find another favorite podcast
there as well. Did I get everything, Kevin?
I think so. Alright. Didn't get all. Well,
with that being said then, thanks everybody for
tuning in and hanging out. We're trying to
get back on schedule with this now that
things have settled down some. So
until next time, stay devoted.
(43:29):
Peace and love.