November 4, 2024 • 22 mins
Message me with comments or questions
If you are like most people on this planet, you have lost weight and felt great, only to regain that same weight and a little bit more. It is beyond maddening and frustrating. So what can you do about it? In this week's podcast, I am going to give you three things to do while losing weight that will help you keep the weight off after you have reached your goal weight.
Discover why eating the foods you love is crucial for long-term success, and how understanding the internal mechanisms behind your eating habits can set you free from the mental pitfalls of deprivation. I provide insights into maintaining a balanced mental state and share resources available through my social media platforms to support your journey.
Many believe that shedding pounds will automatically lead to happiness, but I challenge this notion by emphasizing the importance of self-reflection and internal work. Learn how to identify your core motivations and find joy in life beyond just weight loss. I delve into understanding the emotional triggers that influence our relationship with food and why uncovering your "why" is essential for overcoming challenges.
Lastly, it is essential to discover why you gained weight in the first place and figure out why food is becoming something more in your life than just fuel. This is by far the most important thing to do and this kind of work can often be difficult but it is so worth it. What triggered you to start using food as anything other than fuel?What was happening in your life at that time that caused you to not want to feel emotions and instead to eat them? I offer strategies and encouragement to examine the roots of emotional eating, encouraging support through therapy, coaching, or community groups where necessary.
Connect with me online:
1. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/breakthroughemotionaleating/
2. You Tube channel, Kristin Jones Coaching: https://www.youtube.com/@KristinJonesCoaching44
3. You Tube channel, Breakthrough Emotional Eating Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@breakthroughpodcast-44
3 . Website: https://www.kristinjonescoaching.com
If you want to learn more about how to stop overeating at meals and lose weight easily, get my How To Stop Overeating At Meals Guide: https://go.kristinjonescoaching.com/stop-overeating
Needing more specific and direct support for your emotional eating and overeating? Check out my online course, Stop Dieting Start Feeling, and my personalized coaching program, Breakthrough To You.
If you found this episode helpful, don't forget to leave a review on the platform you used to listen and share it with your friends on your Instagram stories. Also, be sure to follow me o...
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hi and welcome to the Breakthrough Emotional Eating
Podcast.
My name is Kristen Jones andthank you so much for joining me
today.
Now it has been a long hotminute since I have recorded
live on Facebook.
I did most of my first 132episodes of my podcast live in
(00:24):
my Facebook group, breakthroughEmotional Eating, the
Breakthrough Emotional Eatinggroup on Facebook, and for some
reason today I wasn't able to doit in the group.
So we're live on my personalprofile, but wanted to get back
into the swing and the habit andthe routine of a weekly podcast
or releasing a weekly podcast,because there are so many things
(00:47):
for us to continue to talkabout when it comes to emotional
eating.
My frustration today was alittle bit indicative of my
relationship with Facebook rightnow, but I'm going to just
power past that and just be,like you know, super happy to be
back and definitely have somenew things happening, some new
things going on, but also somethings that I definitely want to
(01:10):
share and some tips and somestrategies and all the things
that I have done for the last ohmy gosh four years.
I started my podcast in July of2020.
We went into lockdown in Marchand by July I started my started
recording Actually, I wasalways doing Facebook lives and
then started recording them andmaking them into weekly podcasts
.
So have loved that, have reallyenjoyed it, and I feel like
(01:34):
it's been a really beneficialtool for people and now I just
want to continue to do that aswell.
On that line of thinking, ifyou're new to me and you've just
found this podcast, um, I havea Facebook group.
It's called breakthroughemotional eating uh, stop
overeating for good.
And it is on Facebook.
(01:54):
It's wwwfacebookcom.
Forward slash groups forwardslash food breakthrough.
I am also on Instagram atatthrough Emotional Eating all
one word.
And I also have a brand newYouTube channel.
It's called Kristen JonesCoaching.
Kristen is K-R-I-S-T-I-N JonesCoaching and there I have all
(02:17):
sorts of other topics, othervideos that I have made over the
course of the last three monthsthat I will continue to make
weekly.
Some of those will show up aspodcast topics, some of them
won't, so it's always somethingto jump in.
There's some new material there, new things that you can look
at and definitely somestrategies, tips, lots of shorts
, all sorts of things that youcan check out there in
relationship to overeating andemotional eating.
(02:40):
So today's topic what we'regoing to talk about today is so
today's topic, what we're goingto talk about today, is what do
you need to be doing while youare losing weight in order to
put yourself in the bestpossible position to keep the
weight off?
Because if you're anything likethe millions of people on this
earth who have lost weight hadthe best of intentions, were in
(03:06):
their head saying I'm nevergoing to gain this weight back
again.
And then life came, knockedthem upside the head, ran them
over with a pickup truck andthen, all of a sudden, they're
20 pounds back on and they'relike what the heck just happened
?
How did that happen?
I don't know what's going on.
The things that happen in ourlives we cannot control.
(03:26):
There are things in our liveswe can control, but there are
some things that happen that wejust are not expecting.
We aren't expecting and attimes, we are not equipped to
deal with them, and we just dothe best we can and that's all
anyone can do.
But there are also things thatyou can be doing while you lose
weight to put yourself in thebest possible position to
(03:47):
understand yourself and themechanisms that are going on
within you that are creating thethings that are going on that
are causing you to go back toyour old habits, to go back to
the things that you swore youwere never going to do, and you
always have the best ofintentions, but that darn brain
of yours is going to take youback and it's going to go back
(04:09):
to the things that it's familiarwith.
And so how do we put ourselvesin a position to be able, when
we get to our goal weight, to beable to say okay, I got this
dialed in, I know what I'm goingto do and I'm going to start
living my life in this way andreally try to do this on a daily
basis.
So there are three things thatwe're going to talk about today.
So the first one and this is my, this is my favorite, because
(04:34):
this is this is the one that Ithink is so important for anyone
just trying to lose weight.
I think this is so important,and it is so important and
relevant when you get to yourgoal weight and it's the aspect
of you need to not bedramatically changing every
single thing that you eat inorder to lose weight and I know
(04:58):
that sounds crazy, because mostdiets, most programs that are
helping you to lose weight, aregoing to have you dramatically
change what you eat and when youdo that, you set up in your
mind that that's the only waythat I can lose weight is by
eating brown rice, chicken andbroccoli, and that's the only
(05:22):
thing that I can eat.
And if I don't eat those things, if I don't eat those types of
foods, I'm not going to loseweight and I'm certainly not
going to keep it off.
We need to be losing weighteating the foods that we are
planning on eating for the restof our lives, because otherwise,
what you do is you set yourbrain off into the land of
(05:44):
restriction and deprivation andit is going to push back and
it's going to fight you everystep of the way and twice on
Sunday, because it doesn't wantto be told that it can't eat
something for the rest of yourlife.
It doesn't want to be told thatyou don't get to ever have a
cookie, or you never get to havedessert, or you never.
(06:05):
And and what happens is is thenyou start to have these, these,
you know these times where,when you get to your goal weight
, you've denied yourself all ofthese foods while you were
losing weight, and suddenly it'slike oh my gosh, okay, I don't
have to lose weight anymore.
Now I can go back to the way Iused to eat.
Well, not if you werecompletely starving yourself to
(06:27):
get to that goal weight.
You're never going to be ableto keep it off and so it's
important that we eat foods thatwe enjoy, that we plan on
eating and that are not thingsthat we dislike eating or that
we don't want to regularly havein our lives, because, again,
eating or that we don't want toregularly have in our lives,
(06:48):
because again, you get to thatend result, you get to that end
goal, and then, all of a sudden,you don't want to eat those
foods anymore and your body andyour brain are not don't want to
eat those things anymore either, and so they're going to go
right back to the way you wereeating before.
If there doesn't have to be adramatic change and it just has
to be looking at and I'm notsaying that we eat Twinkies all
day, please don't get me wrongbut I'm saying is that we need
(07:10):
to be able to learn how to eatin a way that we eat the foods
we love and we eat them so wecan lose weight, and it's one of
the things that I've alwaystalked about and it has been a
major tenant in any of myprograms to help people lose
weight, and that is learning toeat to satisfied and learning
that you don't have to be onthat diet rollercoaster, where
(07:34):
it's, I eat as much food as Ican because it's in front of me
and I'll be good tomorrow.
We have to start moving awayfrom that and telling ourselves
no, I just eat until I'msatisfied, and when you do that,
you can eat foods that you love.
But learning how to eat tosatisfied, it's challenging.
(07:55):
And the other thing is it'seating a lot less food than
you're used to eating.
But if you're eating what youreally like, you don't really
need that much food, and that'sa whole different.
That's a whole differentpodcast.
So just want to make sure thatwe remember that we incorporate
foods that we love while we'relosing weight, so we don't have
that dramatic bounce back ofwhen we reach our goal weight,
(08:20):
that all of a sudden things therail, the wheels come off and
you go off the rails and youstart eating everything in sight
that you denied yourself theentire time that you were trying
to lose weight.
All right, number two I'm goingto say of the three things that
we're going to talk about today.
That's the only one that talksabout food, fyi, and you guys
know I don't talk about foodvery much.
(08:41):
So number two don't lose weightto improve your life.
Now, I know that sounds reallystrange.
Well, why?
Why wouldn't I lose weight toimprove my life?
Why wouldn't I lose weight toimprove my health?
I should.
I should add a disclaimer or acaveat to that Don't lose weight
(09:05):
to make yourself happy.
Lose weight to make yourselfhappy.
If your life is not what youwant it to be, losing weight is
not going to change that.
Now, that may be really hardfor a lot of people to hear, but
if you are thinking that losingweight is going to all of a
(09:26):
sudden make your kids less sassy, make your job more enjoyable
and make your husband not be ajerk, I hate to tell you it's
actually going to make thosethings worse.
So we have to start looking atif our, if your life is unhappy.
If you are unhappy and yourlife isn't what you want it to
(09:48):
be, it's all well and good tolose weight.
I think.
If somebody wants to loseweight, that's great.
But don't lose weight to makeyour life better, to make your
life happy.
If you're not happy, you need towork on the inside.
You need to work on how youfeel about yourself while you're
losing weight and figure outwhat is it that I need to be
(10:10):
doing, what is it that I need tobe doing for myself?
How do I need to be changing?
And really that needs to behappening before we really dive
into losing weight.
But they can happensimultaneously, it's fine.
But if you're not, when you'retrying to lose weight, if you're
not doing the inner work on howdo I think about myself, how do
(10:30):
I talk to myself, how do I feelabout who I am and my life, and
am I even living the life thatI want to live?
If you don't address thosethings, what will happen is you
will lose weight, you'll get toyour goal weight.
You'll be so happy, so sassy,and you'll be like I feel so
good, and that'll last about aweek.
(10:53):
And then, all of a sudden,you'll realize, oh, everything
still sucks, my life still blows, I'm not happy at all.
And then, all of a sudden, yourhappiness then is back with
food.
Your happiness is in the foodthat you're eating and it's not
in your life.
So you have to figure out.
(11:14):
What is it that's going to makeme happy right now, even if I'm
20 pounds heavier, even if I'm50 pounds heavier, how can I be
happy right now?
That is what you have.
That's what we have to figureout, and I talk a lot about when
I work with clients.
I talk a lot about where do youfind joy in your life?
(11:36):
Where is joy in your life thatdoesn't have anything to do with
food, that doesn't haveanything to do with going out?
Do you have a hobby?
Do you have things that bringhappiness to you?
If you don't have those things,losing weight is not going to
be the thing that brings thosethings cascading into your life.
You have to figure out thatstuff while you're losing weight
(12:00):
or even before you're losingweight.
You've got to be in a goodmental state as you're losing
weight in order to make it somuch easier to keep that weight
off.
Have to.
Otherwise, again, the reboundeffect and the, the, the, uh
desire.
It suddenly becomes like well,why would I?
(12:21):
I lost weight, I thoughteverything was going to be great
and now it's not.
Well, I might as well eat.
I might as well eat and behappy with that.
And that's where the weightcomes back on.
So that is number two.
Number three and I think this ohsorry, let me back up to number
two again you also have to.
(12:42):
And how do we figure out whatthat is?
We have to figure out, firstoff, why you're losing weight.
And again, you have to behonest If you're losing weight
to make your life better and tomake you happy, that's not
enough of a reason.
It ha.
There has to be a stronger whythan just.
I want to be happy because,again, the weight loss is not
(13:04):
going to do it.
It's not going to do it on itsown.
So you have to.
What is your why?
What is the why?
What is the motivation?
What is the thing that's goingto be driving you to make sure
that when things get toughbecause, yes, it's going to get
really, really tough and it'sgoing to get even tougher when
you get into maintenance and youget to your goal weight, that's
(13:24):
when it starts to get evenharder.
So what is that why?
What is the motivation?
What's the thing behind it?
That's what you have to diginto and really figure out and
then remind yourself every day.
This is what I'm workingtowards, this is why I'm doing
this and oh, by the way, I'mgoing to start talking nicer to
myself and I'm going to startjournaling and I'm going to
start telling myself that I am areally good person, I'm super
(13:46):
proud of myself.
Those things all have to gotogether as well.
They are a whole package andthey have to be there and, sorry
to tell you all, it also has tobe there when you reach your
goal weight too.
You can't stop all of a suddennot doing self-care and not
telling yourself that you're agood person, and not telling
(14:07):
yourself that you think you'reamazing and not telling yourself
the things that you love aboutyourself.
I know no one likes to do that,but you need to be doing that
Because if you're not, againyour self-esteem, your
self-image, how you feel aboutyourself, all of that is going
to go down the toilet and it'sgoing to be so hard not to find
(14:27):
comfort and not find peace backwith food.
All right, now I can move on tonumber three.
Number three and this one isthis is a tough one.
This is a tough one.
It's absolutely doable, but itdefinitely takes work.
And this is you have to figureout why you gained weight in the
(14:50):
first place, and that sometimes, for many of us, that is a deep
, dark, hard thing to come toface, to come to terms with.
It's possibly something fromyour childhood, possibly
something from any aspect, somepart of your life, some trigger,
something that caused you atsome point to feel like food was
(15:15):
needed to be used as anythingother than fuel, and that it
became your best friend, itbecame your comfort and became
the thing that you turned to.
And figuring out where thattrigger is, what that trigger is
and how to change that beliefthat you have, that food has
(15:37):
that place in your life.
And a lot of that starts withwhat are you telling yourself?
Are you telling yourself thatfood is the only thing that
makes you happy?
Are you telling yourself that,oh my gosh, I can't wait for
this family event because of allthe food we're going to eat,
and instead of saying, gosh, Ican't wait to be hanging out
with these people?
You might not feel that way,but sometimes we don't feel that
(15:59):
way.
But you have to be carefulabout what you're telling
yourself, because those beliefsare going to continue to be
reinforced.
And so, figuring out what wasthe trigger, when did I start
needing to diet?
When did I start gaining weight.
When did I start not feelinggood about myself and what were
(16:19):
the circumstances?
And how can I go about makingthose changes?
Where do we start to make thosechanges?
Well, a lot of times we startby maybe we need to talk to
somebody.
Maybe we need to find atherapist, maybe we need to find
a coach.
Maybe we need to find someone aFacebook group, whatever it is
but somebody who can help younavigate.
(16:40):
Okay, when did this start?
When did I start feeling thisway, and why did I believe that
food was the answer, that foodwas the thing that was going to
make me feel better, or that Ineeded to put on weight to keep
people away from me, or I neededto isolate myself?
What was it?
Where was it?
And then, how do we go aboutchanging that?
Maybe you need to startjournaling.
(17:02):
Maybe you need to start doingaffirmations.
Maybe you need to start havinga morning routine.
All of those things are allpossibilities.
I don't have the answer for you, but I do have an idea of the
direction in which you can go in, and that is figuring out okay,
where, when did this start?
And sometimes it's like it'slooking back and realizing gosh,
(17:24):
you know, I have to look backat some things that really
aren't very comfortable and theymight not feel very good and
they might actually bring up alot of emotions that I don't
want to deal with.
But if you've been doing thatfor most of your life, it's
those emotions that are causingyou to turn to food and to think
that that's where the answer isand that's where the comfort is
(17:47):
.
Because we don't want to dealwith these uncomfortable
feelings, we just allowedourselves to feel our feelings,
things that could be very, verydifferent.
And how do we go about doingthat?
A whole nother podcast for awhole nother day, actually.
I think I actually have apodcast on that.
So it's important to recognize,okay, where are the triggers?
(18:07):
Where have those triggers comefrom?
When did I start gaining weight?
Why have I gained weight in thepast?
Why have I turned to food?
What is that?
How has it happened?
And then, what are some stepsthat I can take?
And if I don't know what to do,then I say, okay, who can I
call?
Who can I talk to?
Who can?
Maybe I can start by justjournaling how I'm feeling every
(18:27):
day.
All of those things arepossibilities, they're all
things, all steps that you cantake, but those three things the
three things not changingdramatically what you eat while
you're losing weight, looking atyour uh, looking at your not
not losing weight in order to behappy, and then figuring out
(18:49):
where the triggers why did Igain weight in the first place?
These three things have to beexamined, they have to be looked
at and they should be looked atwhile you're losing weight.
So many people say, well, when Ilose weight, then I'll address
those things.
You got to do it during.
You got to do it while it'shappening.
Because, while you're losingweight, because that's where you
(19:10):
get your emotions under control, that's where you're and it's
going to make losing weight somuch easier because you're going
to get your emotions undercontrol, you're going to
understand why you emotionallyreact in certain ways and why
you turn to food and you canstart making those changes and
and the weight loss will be somuch easier to manage instead of
just let me just, let me justgrind through, let me just start
(19:32):
myself to get to that place andthen, all of a sudden, I'll
start doing the work.
Probably won't, you probablywon't, and you probably won't
until about 10 pounds come backon and then you start to panic.
So we've got to do the work inthe trenches while it's
happening in order to be able toset yourself up, to be able to
(19:53):
make sure that you are doing.
You have the most tools and themost strategies and all the
things that you need in order tokeep that off and maintain your
weight loss once you reach yourgoal weight.
I hope this podcast has beenhelpful.
I hope that what I've sharedwith you has been helpful and it
has made you think of a coupleof things of like.
(20:14):
Hmm, I think I could probablylook at some of these things.
I think this is probablysomething that maybe I need to
start journaling on, and if itis, that's great, that's
wonderful.
Start doing and again, and I'mgoing to do a whole I'm going to
do a podcast.
Actually, I'm going to do aYouTube video on how do you
start journaling.
What is that supposed to looklike?
It's not that hard.
(20:35):
But just start getting yourfeelings out.
Just start processing youremotions, start allowing
yourself to feel your feelings,but do it without a bag of
cookies and some chips sittingnext to you.
Just make it about you andabout your feelings.
But we've got to start diggingdeeper, because if we really
want to keep weight off, wereally want to get a handle on
(20:56):
our own mental health, we haveto start doing that deeper work
and it can't just be the surfacestuff.
And that's what we do here.
That's what we do here in thispodcast and we do this in the
Facebook group as well.
How do we dig deeper?
How do we go deeper into whatis really happening?
It's also what I do with myprivate coaching as well.
What do we do to get deeperinto what's really going on,
(21:16):
what's behind why we gain weightin the first place and have
that accompany as we lose weight, because then we're going to be
in the best position to keep itoff.
So just a reminder againFacebook group Breakthrough
Emotional Eating wwwfacebookcom.
Forward slash groups.
Forward slash food.
(21:37):
Breakthrough Instagram atBreakthrough Emotional Eating,
at Breakthrough Emotional Eatingon Instagram and YouTube
channel new YouTube channel.
Jump on, check out some videos,hit the subscribe button, like
some things, throw some commentsin.
I'd love to hear from you.
It is Kristen Jones Coaching.
Kristen K-R-I-S-T-I-N JonesCoaching.
(22:00):
All right, I will see you allnext week.
Thank you so much for joiningme and take care and reach out
anytime you need anything, butplease make sure you are
focusing on you as you aretrying to lose weight, because
it will make it so much easierwhen you get to your goal weight
.
All right, we'll see you nextweek.
Hi and welcome to the Breakthrough Emotional Eating
Podcast.
My name is Kristen Jones andthank you so much for joining me
today.
Now it has been a long hotminute since I have recorded
live on Facebook.
I did most of my first 132episodes of my podcast live in
(00:24):
my Facebook group, breakthroughEmotional Eating, the
Breakthrough Emotional Eatinggroup on Facebook, and for some
reason today I wasn't able to doit in the group.
So we're live on my personalprofile, but wanted to get back
into the swing and the habit andthe routine of a weekly podcast
or releasing a weekly podcast,because there are so many things
(00:47):
for us to continue to talkabout when it comes to emotional
eating.
My frustration today was alittle bit indicative of my
relationship with Facebook rightnow, but I'm going to just
power past that and just be,like you know, super happy to be
back and definitely have somenew things happening, some new
things going on, but also somethings that I definitely want to
(01:10):
share and some tips and somestrategies and all the things
that I have done for the last ohmy gosh four years.
I started my podcast in July of2020.
We went into lockdown in Marchand by July I started my started
recording Actually, I wasalways doing Facebook lives and
then started recording them andmaking them into weekly podcasts
.
So have loved that, have reallyenjoyed it, and I feel like
(01:34):
it's been a really beneficialtool for people and now I just
want to continue to do that aswell.
On that line of thinking, ifyou're new to me and you've just
found this podcast, um, I havea Facebook group.
It's called breakthroughemotional eating uh, stop
overeating for good.
And it is on Facebook.
(01:54):
It's wwwfacebookcom.
Forward slash groups forwardslash food breakthrough.
I am also on Instagram atatthrough Emotional Eating all
one word.
And I also have a brand newYouTube channel.
It's called Kristen JonesCoaching.
Kristen is K-R-I-S-T-I-N JonesCoaching and there I have all
(02:17):
sorts of other topics, othervideos that I have made over the
course of the last three monthsthat I will continue to make
weekly.
Some of those will show up aspodcast topics, some of them
won't, so it's always somethingto jump in.
There's some new material there, new things that you can look
at and definitely somestrategies, tips, lots of shorts
, all sorts of things that youcan check out there in
relationship to overeating andemotional eating.
(02:40):
So today's topic what we'regoing to talk about today is so
today's topic, what we're goingto talk about today, is what do
you need to be doing while youare losing weight in order to
put yourself in the bestpossible position to keep the
weight off?
Because if you're anything likethe millions of people on this
earth who have lost weight hadthe best of intentions, were in
(03:06):
their head saying I'm nevergoing to gain this weight back
again.
And then life came, knockedthem upside the head, ran them
over with a pickup truck andthen, all of a sudden, they're
20 pounds back on and they'relike what the heck just happened
?
How did that happen?
I don't know what's going on.
The things that happen in ourlives we cannot control.
(03:26):
There are things in our liveswe can control, but there are
some things that happen that wejust are not expecting.
We aren't expecting and attimes, we are not equipped to
deal with them, and we just dothe best we can and that's all
anyone can do.
But there are also things thatyou can be doing while you lose
weight to put yourself in thebest possible position to
(03:47):
understand yourself and themechanisms that are going on
within you that are creating thethings that are going on that
are causing you to go back toyour old habits, to go back to
the things that you swore youwere never going to do, and you
always have the best ofintentions, but that darn brain
of yours is going to take youback and it's going to go back
(04:09):
to the things that it's familiarwith.
And so how do we put ourselvesin a position to be able, when
we get to our goal weight, to beable to say okay, I got this
dialed in, I know what I'm goingto do and I'm going to start
living my life in this way andreally try to do this on a daily
basis.
So there are three things thatwe're going to talk about today.
So the first one and this is my, this is my favorite, because
(04:34):
this is this is the one that Ithink is so important for anyone
just trying to lose weight.
I think this is so important,and it is so important and
relevant when you get to yourgoal weight and it's the aspect
of you need to not bedramatically changing every
single thing that you eat inorder to lose weight and I know
(04:58):
that sounds crazy, because mostdiets, most programs that are
helping you to lose weight, aregoing to have you dramatically
change what you eat and when youdo that, you set up in your
mind that that's the only waythat I can lose weight is by
eating brown rice, chicken andbroccoli, and that's the only
(05:22):
thing that I can eat.
And if I don't eat those things, if I don't eat those types of
foods, I'm not going to loseweight and I'm certainly not
going to keep it off.
We need to be losing weighteating the foods that we are
planning on eating for the restof our lives, because otherwise,
what you do is you set yourbrain off into the land of
(05:44):
restriction and deprivation andit is going to push back and
it's going to fight you everystep of the way and twice on
Sunday, because it doesn't wantto be told that it can't eat
something for the rest of yourlife.
It doesn't want to be told thatyou don't get to ever have a
cookie, or you never get to havedessert, or you never.
(06:05):
And and what happens is is thenyou start to have these, these,
you know these times where,when you get to your goal weight
, you've denied yourself all ofthese foods while you were
losing weight, and suddenly it'slike oh my gosh, okay, I don't
have to lose weight anymore.
Now I can go back to the way Iused to eat.
Well, not if you werecompletely starving yourself to
(06:27):
get to that goal weight.
You're never going to be ableto keep it off and so it's
important that we eat foods thatwe enjoy, that we plan on
eating and that are not thingsthat we dislike eating or that
we don't want to regularly havein our lives, because, again,
eating or that we don't want toregularly have in our lives,
(06:48):
because again, you get to thatend result, you get to that end
goal, and then, all of a sudden,you don't want to eat those
foods anymore and your body andyour brain are not don't want to
eat those things anymore either, and so they're going to go
right back to the way you wereeating before.
If there doesn't have to be adramatic change and it just has
to be looking at and I'm notsaying that we eat Twinkies all
day, please don't get me wrongbut I'm saying is that we need
(07:10):
to be able to learn how to eatin a way that we eat the foods
we love and we eat them so wecan lose weight, and it's one of
the things that I've alwaystalked about and it has been a
major tenant in any of myprograms to help people lose
weight, and that is learning toeat to satisfied and learning
that you don't have to be onthat diet rollercoaster, where
(07:34):
it's, I eat as much food as Ican because it's in front of me
and I'll be good tomorrow.
We have to start moving awayfrom that and telling ourselves
no, I just eat until I'msatisfied, and when you do that,
you can eat foods that you love.
But learning how to eat tosatisfied, it's challenging.
(07:55):
And the other thing is it'seating a lot less food than
you're used to eating.
But if you're eating what youreally like, you don't really
need that much food, and that'sa whole different.
That's a whole differentpodcast.
So just want to make sure thatwe remember that we incorporate
foods that we love while we'relosing weight, so we don't have
that dramatic bounce back ofwhen we reach our goal weight,
(08:20):
that all of a sudden things therail, the wheels come off and
you go off the rails and youstart eating everything in sight
that you denied yourself theentire time that you were trying
to lose weight.
All right, number two I'm goingto say of the three things that
we're going to talk about today.
That's the only one that talksabout food, fyi, and you guys
know I don't talk about foodvery much.
(08:41):
So number two don't lose weightto improve your life.
Now, I know that sounds reallystrange.
Well, why?
Why wouldn't I lose weight toimprove my life?
Why wouldn't I lose weight toimprove my health?
I should.
I should add a disclaimer or acaveat to that Don't lose weight
(09:05):
to make yourself happy.
Lose weight to make yourselfhappy.
If your life is not what youwant it to be, losing weight is
not going to change that.
Now, that may be really hardfor a lot of people to hear, but
if you are thinking that losingweight is going to all of a
(09:26):
sudden make your kids less sassy, make your job more enjoyable
and make your husband not be ajerk, I hate to tell you it's
actually going to make thosethings worse.
So we have to start looking atif our, if your life is unhappy.
If you are unhappy and yourlife isn't what you want it to
(09:48):
be, it's all well and good tolose weight.
I think.
If somebody wants to loseweight, that's great.
But don't lose weight to makeyour life better, to make your
life happy.
If you're not happy, you need towork on the inside.
You need to work on how youfeel about yourself while you're
losing weight and figure outwhat is it that I need to be
(10:10):
doing, what is it that I need tobe doing for myself?
How do I need to be changing?
And really that needs to behappening before we really dive
into losing weight.
But they can happensimultaneously, it's fine.
But if you're not, when you'retrying to lose weight, if you're
not doing the inner work on howdo I think about myself, how do
(10:30):
I talk to myself, how do I feelabout who I am and my life, and
am I even living the life thatI want to live?
If you don't address thosethings, what will happen is you
will lose weight, you'll get toyour goal weight.
You'll be so happy, so sassy,and you'll be like I feel so
good, and that'll last about aweek.
(10:53):
And then, all of a sudden,you'll realize, oh, everything
still sucks, my life still blows, I'm not happy at all.
And then, all of a sudden, yourhappiness then is back with
food.
Your happiness is in the foodthat you're eating and it's not
in your life.
So you have to figure out.
(11:14):
What is it that's going to makeme happy right now, even if I'm
20 pounds heavier, even if I'm50 pounds heavier, how can I be
happy right now?
That is what you have.
That's what we have to figureout, and I talk a lot about when
I work with clients.
I talk a lot about where do youfind joy in your life?
(11:36):
Where is joy in your life thatdoesn't have anything to do with
food, that doesn't haveanything to do with going out?
Do you have a hobby?
Do you have things that bringhappiness to you?
If you don't have those things,losing weight is not going to
be the thing that brings thosethings cascading into your life.
You have to figure out thatstuff while you're losing weight
(12:00):
or even before you're losingweight.
You've got to be in a goodmental state as you're losing
weight in order to make it somuch easier to keep that weight
off.
Have to.
Otherwise, again, the reboundeffect and the, the, the, uh
desire.
It suddenly becomes like well,why would I?
(12:21):
I lost weight, I thoughteverything was going to be great
and now it's not.
Well, I might as well eat.
I might as well eat and behappy with that.
And that's where the weightcomes back on.
So that is number two.
Number three and I think this ohsorry, let me back up to number
two again you also have to.
(12:42):
And how do we figure out whatthat is?
We have to figure out, firstoff, why you're losing weight.
And again, you have to behonest If you're losing weight
to make your life better and tomake you happy, that's not
enough of a reason.
It ha.
There has to be a stronger whythan just.
I want to be happy because,again, the weight loss is not
(13:04):
going to do it.
It's not going to do it on itsown.
So you have to.
What is your why?
What is the why?
What is the motivation?
What is the thing that's goingto be driving you to make sure
that when things get toughbecause, yes, it's going to get
really, really tough and it'sgoing to get even tougher when
you get into maintenance and youget to your goal weight, that's
(13:24):
when it starts to get evenharder.
So what is that why?
What is the motivation?
What's the thing behind it?
That's what you have to diginto and really figure out and
then remind yourself every day.
This is what I'm workingtowards, this is why I'm doing
this and oh, by the way, I'mgoing to start talking nicer to
myself and I'm going to startjournaling and I'm going to
start telling myself that I am areally good person, I'm super
(13:46):
proud of myself.
Those things all have to gotogether as well.
They are a whole package andthey have to be there and, sorry
to tell you all, it also has tobe there when you reach your
goal weight too.
You can't stop all of a suddennot doing self-care and not
telling yourself that you're agood person, and not telling
(14:07):
yourself that you think you'reamazing and not telling yourself
the things that you love aboutyourself.
I know no one likes to do that,but you need to be doing that
Because if you're not, againyour self-esteem, your
self-image, how you feel aboutyourself, all of that is going
to go down the toilet and it'sgoing to be so hard not to find
(14:27):
comfort and not find peace backwith food.
All right, now I can move on tonumber three.
Number three and this one isthis is a tough one.
This is a tough one.
It's absolutely doable, but itdefinitely takes work.
And this is you have to figureout why you gained weight in the
(14:50):
first place, and that sometimes, for many of us, that is a deep
, dark, hard thing to come toface, to come to terms with.
It's possibly something fromyour childhood, possibly
something from any aspect, somepart of your life, some trigger,
something that caused you atsome point to feel like food was
(15:15):
needed to be used as anythingother than fuel, and that it
became your best friend, itbecame your comfort and became
the thing that you turned to.
And figuring out where thattrigger is, what that trigger is
and how to change that beliefthat you have, that food has
(15:37):
that place in your life.
And a lot of that starts withwhat are you telling yourself?
Are you telling yourself thatfood is the only thing that
makes you happy?
Are you telling yourself that,oh my gosh, I can't wait for
this family event because of allthe food we're going to eat,
and instead of saying, gosh, Ican't wait to be hanging out
with these people?
You might not feel that way,but sometimes we don't feel that
(15:59):
way.
But you have to be carefulabout what you're telling
yourself, because those beliefsare going to continue to be
reinforced.
And so, figuring out what wasthe trigger, when did I start
needing to diet?
When did I start gaining weight.
When did I start not feelinggood about myself and what were
(16:19):
the circumstances?
And how can I go about makingthose changes?
Where do we start to make thosechanges?
Well, a lot of times we startby maybe we need to talk to
somebody.
Maybe we need to find atherapist, maybe we need to find
a coach.
Maybe we need to find someone aFacebook group, whatever it is
but somebody who can help younavigate.
(16:40):
Okay, when did this start?
When did I start feeling thisway, and why did I believe that
food was the answer, that foodwas the thing that was going to
make me feel better, or that Ineeded to put on weight to keep
people away from me, or I neededto isolate myself?
What was it?
Where was it?
And then, how do we go aboutchanging that?
Maybe you need to startjournaling.
(17:02):
Maybe you need to start doingaffirmations.
Maybe you need to start havinga morning routine.
All of those things are allpossibilities.
I don't have the answer for you, but I do have an idea of the
direction in which you can go in, and that is figuring out okay,
where, when did this start?
And sometimes it's like it'slooking back and realizing gosh,
(17:24):
you know, I have to look backat some things that really
aren't very comfortable and theymight not feel very good and
they might actually bring up alot of emotions that I don't
want to deal with.
But if you've been doing thatfor most of your life, it's
those emotions that are causingyou to turn to food and to think
that that's where the answer isand that's where the comfort is
(17:47):
.
Because we don't want to dealwith these uncomfortable
feelings, we just allowedourselves to feel our feelings,
things that could be very, verydifferent.
And how do we go about doingthat?
A whole nother podcast for awhole nother day, actually.
I think I actually have apodcast on that.
So it's important to recognize,okay, where are the triggers?
(18:07):
Where have those triggers comefrom?
When did I start gaining weight?
Why have I gained weight in thepast?
Why have I turned to food?
What is that?
How has it happened?
And then, what are some stepsthat I can take?
And if I don't know what to do,then I say, okay, who can I
call?
Who can I talk to?
Who can?
Maybe I can start by justjournaling how I'm feeling every
(18:27):
day.
All of those things arepossibilities, they're all
things, all steps that you cantake, but those three things the
three things not changingdramatically what you eat while
you're losing weight, looking atyour uh, looking at your not
not losing weight in order to behappy, and then figuring out
(18:49):
where the triggers why did Igain weight in the first place?
These three things have to beexamined, they have to be looked
at and they should be looked atwhile you're losing weight.
So many people say, well, when Ilose weight, then I'll address
those things.
You got to do it during.
You got to do it while it'shappening.
Because, while you're losingweight, because that's where you
(19:10):
get your emotions under control, that's where you're and it's
going to make losing weight somuch easier because you're going
to get your emotions undercontrol, you're going to
understand why you emotionallyreact in certain ways and why
you turn to food and you canstart making those changes and
and the weight loss will be somuch easier to manage instead of
just let me just, let me justgrind through, let me just start
(19:32):
myself to get to that place andthen, all of a sudden, I'll
start doing the work.
Probably won't, you probablywon't, and you probably won't
until about 10 pounds come backon and then you start to panic.
So we've got to do the work inthe trenches while it's
happening in order to be able toset yourself up, to be able to
(19:53):
make sure that you are doing.
You have the most tools and themost strategies and all the
things that you need in order tokeep that off and maintain your
weight loss once you reach yourgoal weight.
I hope this podcast has beenhelpful.
I hope that what I've sharedwith you has been helpful and it
has made you think of a coupleof things of like.
(20:14):
Hmm, I think I could probablylook at some of these things.
I think this is probablysomething that maybe I need to
start journaling on, and if itis, that's great, that's
wonderful.
Start doing and again, and I'mgoing to do a whole I'm going to
do a podcast.
Actually, I'm going to do aYouTube video on how do you
start journaling.
What is that supposed to looklike?
It's not that hard.
(20:35):
But just start getting yourfeelings out.
Just start processing youremotions, start allowing
yourself to feel your feelings,but do it without a bag of
cookies and some chips sittingnext to you.
Just make it about you andabout your feelings.
But we've got to start diggingdeeper, because if we really
want to keep weight off, wereally want to get a handle on
(20:56):
our own mental health, we haveto start doing that deeper work
and it can't just be the surfacestuff.
And that's what we do here.
That's what we do here in thispodcast and we do this in the
Facebook group as well.
How do we dig deeper?
How do we go deeper into whatis really happening?
It's also what I do with myprivate coaching as well.
What do we do to get deeperinto what's really going on,
(21:16):
what's behind why we gain weightin the first place and have
that accompany as we lose weight, because then we're going to be
in the best position to keep itoff.
So just a reminder againFacebook group Breakthrough
Emotional Eating wwwfacebookcom.
Forward slash groups.
Forward slash food.
(21:37):
Breakthrough Instagram atBreakthrough Emotional Eating,
at Breakthrough Emotional Eatingon Instagram and YouTube
channel new YouTube channel.
Jump on, check out some videos,hit the subscribe button, like
some things, throw some commentsin.
I'd love to hear from you.
It is Kristen Jones Coaching.
Kristen K-R-I-S-T-I-N JonesCoaching.
(22:00):
All right, I will see you allnext week.
Thank you so much for joiningme and take care and reach out
anytime you need anything, butplease make sure you are
focusing on you as you aretrying to lose weight, because
it will make it so much easierwhen you get to your goal weight
.
All right, we'll see you nextweek.
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