May 14, 2025 • 76 mins
There is a brand-new episode of The BroTherapy Show every Wednesday morning!!
Tonight, we get on a few topics pertaining to memories. There wasn't a clear resolution at the end of the discussion. We would like you to join in and give your opinion on the matter. We can be reached on this episode's description page or by email at thebrotherapyshow@gmail.com
If you would like to check out more of our content, please feel free to visit https://linktr.ee/aceford
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Oh shit. Yeah.
Episode 92 of Bro Therapy. Yeah, you got it.
That's plenty of shit. This is the.
(00:20):
This is the. This is.
The this is. The.
This is show for me and my rosestap into our emotions.
It's cool if you want a pole, noego allowed.
This is the place where the mango and free our minds abroad
and stretch out the window. Hot topics.
You gotta test whatever is on your hurry in your mind, if that
(00:42):
makes sense. Speaking about whatever.
No judgment you put in it, let it flow.
Just like what are the other brands you get on my drift.
A point of view for my ones in astory and glimpse.
No feel they say what it is undescripted.
No need to watch what you said. It's the truth.
Hurt. Pro therapy is the meds.
I said this is the pro therapy show.
(01:03):
I said this is the pro therapy show.
This is that uplift to me that has you low.
This is that uplift to me that has you low.
I said this is the pro therapy show.
I said this is the pro therapy. Episode 92 of the Birth Therapy
(01:32):
Show. That's so funny.
I was about to be like, I was like, so we're gonna are, are
the mics high? Then you're like episode 90.
Oh my God. I guess that was shit.
Here we are God damn episode 92.Say something, say something for
me. OK, say something for me.
(01:53):
Solid. All right, all right, now we're
going to now it's episode 92 of the Bro Therapy Show.
Episode 92 of the bro therapy show Cross from me is my partner
in crime. How you doing today?
I'm all right. I I.
(02:15):
You look, you look great today, man.
You look like you're doing good,man.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.How's it been?
This is so cringe what you been up?
Why is this this like feel so like?
(02:36):
You don't like the bit yo scripted yo that's.
Grippy feeling, 'cause you know there's probably motherfuckers
who try to really do that. Today in the news they said.
How you feeling today man? I just ate some St. corn so I'm
(03:01):
like, I'm feeling fantastic. Groovy.
I gotta stop going to the Taco truck stoned.
Yeah, man, how much food you order that?
You, I, I, we're not going to talk about that on record, but.
God damn. Yeah, or how much money I've
given these people in the last month.
(03:25):
Well since we're talking about good food, I'd like to I'd like
to make a shout out to some something I was made aware of
recently by my Co host sitting across from me.
(03:46):
Yo, shout out to Ghana. Apparently big hit you also like
fans of Ghana. Yo, ain't that crazy?
We big love, big love and I and I sat off in the back of the of
good food because I've seen a lot of like food TikTok from
(04:07):
Ghana and yeah, good food definitely looks like amazing
food. Every time I see that so shouts
out yo mad love and mad love andappreciation.
Yo, that's kind of, that's kind of wild, right?
Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, we got, I was going
(04:28):
through the show's emails and wegot, we got some good news and
some confusing bad news that ended up being no news.
But we, we landed, uh #145 out of the top 200 comedy podcasts
(04:49):
in Ghana. I'm like, yo, a win is a win
dawg. For real, I, I saw that you sent
me that and I was just like, well, God damn, yo.
Fucking mad respect to to our toour listeners from Ghana because
like they holding that down. Yo, I'm about to I wonder.
(05:13):
So I made sure when we got on this episode today, I was like,
Nah, we're going to let him know.
Hell yeah. I appreciate the listeners in
Ghana. And we have listeners.
And there was another like just random place that I wouldn't
have. We have listeners in Saudi
(05:34):
Arabia. Hell yeah.
Now does is Dubai, I'm sorry, but I'm not sure is Dubai in
Saudi Arabia or is that its own thing?
Because I'm wondering like, well, yeah, I'm getting more
exposure to that, that region ofthe world.
(05:56):
One of the guys that was in he was a outlaw.
He was that was Tupac's rap group.
He he changed his life around after PAC got killed and he
became like a devout Muslim and he moved to Saudi Arabia.
And he's always like on interviews and stuff like he's a
(06:18):
very peaceful guy. He's always on interviews like
saying how like how nice Saudi Arabia is.
Like, first of all, they have way stricter immigration
policies than we even we do. And we're dealing with some
crazy shit right now. But apart from that, like free
(06:39):
health care, free education. Need I say more?
Yeah. And I agree anyway.
I No politics. No politics.
Yeah, that's Fireman we got we Mr. Worldwide.
(07:04):
Mr. Worldwide shouts out. And then?
Loving love and appreciation to to to both the to both parties.
Hell yeah. Shout out to them.
We got another e-mail that was confusing because we went, we've
(07:26):
been rocking, we've been doing this podcast four years. 11
years. 11 years. Four years, four years and we've
never once. Never once.
Not to say we've been so good about it.
So good. Got a copyright strike?
(07:46):
Never once. Never once in four years and the
whole time doing this. We still don't have one right
technically. Technically, we don't.
It doesn't show it. It doesn't show Yeah all.
Right, so maybe it was a mistakeon their end.
Well, the, the last thing they said in a e-mail was we're, I
(08:10):
guess I didn't get the, I didn'tread the e-mail in time and
respond to them in time. So the last thing they said was
we're going to reach out to the owners of the content you're
using and if they have a problemwith it, then we're going to
(08:33):
strike you. But if it's OK that you're
allowed to use this, then this will just go away.
So but they. Didn't tell us what it was.
But they didn't tell us what it was.
And that's really what I'm bummed out about.
So I can have like a better ideaof what to steer away from.
But it's anyway, we got this e-mail and it was saying that we
(08:57):
got a copyright strike and like we needed to correct this
particular episode or they were going to take it down off
Spotify. And I went through to see what
episode it was and then it popped up that there was no
strikes and there was no episodes to review.
But going off of the day of the messaging from our podcast host,
(09:25):
I think it's called Spotify for Creators now.
It used to be anchor. But anyway, I digress.
It was the date on that. It had to be a episode from
episode 87 and up. So one of our recent episodes
(09:51):
and I went through them all. They're all still posted, but
the only thing I can think of isthat fucking hip hop shit we
were talking about with the Ricoh case and all that shit.
You remember when I played the podcast the of Big you and shit?
Yeah. That's the only thing I can
(10:13):
think of that we played. You think that might be it?
It's the only thing. Should we take it out?
I mean in. Case like maybe they maybe the
maybe they Spotify did reach outand the other party just hasn't
got back to them. Yeah, we'll talk more about that
(10:37):
off Mike. True.
Good point. Right now we have no strikes.
We're good. We're back in good standing.
We're back in good standing. And we got listeners in Ghana.
Listeners in Ghana. Think about that like, yeah,
it's 1:45, but just think that like there's 55 other podcasts,
(11:01):
55 other productions that like people listen to us more and not
like in that. I don't mean that in a negative
way, like they suck or anything.I just mean like if you asked me
honestly in my heart what numberI thought we fell at, I would
tell you #200 so to be like at 1:45, I'm like, oh shit.
(11:24):
That means there's definitely some listens.
Oh hell yeah. And you know what?
And you said Saudi Arabia was #2?
Not #2 just it was just another country.
That was up there. Yeah, well, it was just a
country, yeah, that I didn't expect.
It was just like out of left field.
(11:48):
All right, and, and for the sakeof like conversation, let me
throw like a hypothetical at you.
Like woo, woo talk. We're gonna have some woo woo
time now. OK.
Alright, umm what if instincts right?
(12:13):
DNA, memory retention, these things like that you kind of
just know to do or any living thing kind of knows to do.
Yeah. Or like these deep things like
the fears, like the afraid of the darks, the monsters and this
(12:34):
and that, right? What if there's like a cloud?
Like a cloud equivalent to like universal consciousness.
This gets kind of close to like,what's that, panpsychism?
But like, not really. I'm not talking about
(12:54):
panpsychism. I'm not familiar with that is.
Panpsychism is like the belief that everything has like a
consciousness, like even like a rock, like just but just like
it's different levels. OK.
But like, everything, has a little bit of consciousness
instilled in it all. Right, I'm following conscious
(13:15):
cloud. What's that mean?
Yeah, conscious cloud, like whatif there's like a layer of
dimension or like existence thatpermeates where it's kind of
like the reference of lived experience of like everything.
So when new things are born, it uses the backlogged information
(13:42):
and like codes that into the newthing.
Like it downloads that those like lived memories in a way in
the coding of the DNA, in the same way like a computer or your
phone, like refers back to like storage that you're keeping in
(14:04):
the cloud. So that's why like when new
things are born and something dies, like when it when
something dies, those lived experiences don't just
disappear. Like the memory of the
consciousness like is stored. That lived experience is stored
in this like consciousness cloudair quote.
(14:31):
And when when a new thing is born, it retains some of that
lived experience. And it's like in its encoding in
its DNA. And that's why it knows certain
things from the past to do instinctually to survive as it
gets older or after it's born. Like, think about it like a
(15:02):
extra layer of like reality. I actually, I actually kind of
dig this theory where where likewhat's the connection between
like the conscious cloud and andlike the DNA because like when
you get to the like when you were talking about like the
(15:23):
backlog of memories and stuff when people were born and things
like, I really kind of jive withthat and we could talk about
that in a second. But then when you get into the
DNA part, it kind of just soundslike you're explaining like
genetic memory and like, So what?
Like what's the connection between the two?
(15:43):
Like how did how they play? Like how are they connected in
this theory? I guess like the way they're
connected in the theory would bethe way that DNA gets encoded
with genetic memory is because of the cloud.
I'm following. I'm following.
Like to encode the DNA has to pull the resources like that
(16:07):
information from somewhere and that information is that
consciousness cloud. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm following now. Yo, I jive with it because like
I feel like we see technology aswe like build upon it and
improve it. Like it mimics the, the, the
(16:30):
physical experience very much like we've talked about this
kajillion times where like the camera is a mimic of the retina,
the motherboard is like the, themimic of the brain.
And like so Wi-Fi is spirituality like.
So this theory actually fits right into like all those things
(16:54):
for me. So I jive with it.
What's crazy too in my brain is like that's exactly what
sentient like AI in a in a weirdway, that's probably how we
would describe the way it its life, existence and procreation
(17:14):
like would work, right? I'm following.
Like we would be like, well, it stores all its information,
lived experience in the cloud. And then when new things are
born, it just taps in from that past lived experiences and then
continues to write new code on top of it.
(17:36):
Like that's exactly what like a sentient AI robot would do,
right? Like at least in my brain, this
is how I kind of got to this. Like it was something I was
thinking about this week, people.
And it's funny. It's like people would be like,
how what? I'll ask a question like that
and people would be like, why are you?
What are you? How do you even start thinking
about stuff like this? I'm like, I just have a thought
(17:57):
and I just keep going. So like I'll be quiet for like
the next like 7 hours at work. And it's because I'm just like
working through like a thought in my head and just like
thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking and like
talking through all the different possibilities with
myself. Yeah, it's a pretty cool idea.
(18:21):
I fuck with it, I fuck with it. Bro, were you were you hoping
for pushback or something like for?
Oh, no. For content, No.
I was just interested to see what you thought.
I thought it was an interesting thought experiment, I guess
(18:42):
like. Yeah, man, I dig it.
I had an episode of the Ace FordPodcast drop tonight.
Yeah, you sent me a link. I haven't listened to it yet.
Yeah, first one back in a couplemonths.
I'm excited to listen to it. It's a pretty, it's a chill
(19:03):
conversation. It's pretty dope.
To be real. The a big reason why I recorded
this episode was because probably like six or seven
episodes ago of birth therapy, me and you were having a
(19:27):
conversation and I was trying tolike express to you that like I
hate how much I say like by the way, I've been listening back on
the episodes and it's fucking it's driving you crazy.
It's gross. I was trying to express to you
(19:47):
that dot, when you get pulled over and trucking and or like
the weight stations and everything, it's it's not the
same anxiousness that you get when you have to deal with a
regular cop. It's more so for a lot of truck
(20:11):
drivers. It just, it feels like another
day at the office. It's so like ingrained in like
our everyday work. Life that it's just and
seriously, dot cops are most of the time, most of the time are
usually a lot chiller like they they get it too.
(20:32):
They're like just trying to they're trying to get you back
to it as quick as possible and they're most of the time pretty
cool, especially when you're cool to them.
They're definitely like pretty chill.
So anyway, a friend that I went to high school with, she's a
truck driver and she actually goes all over the country,
(20:56):
whereas I'm just local. And we got into like all those
conversations and like, I just wanted to like create an episode
with like another professional driver where we're like, we talk
about the things we deal with with dot and the weight stations
and the regulations and restrictions that the government
(21:17):
puts on truck drivers. We, we dove into the, the topic
about in Arkansas, it's AII can't believe it's actually
real. I don't know why I'm surprised
about this, but in Arkansas, like they're literally making
truck drivers read and write a sentence in English.
(21:42):
And I'm like, damn. So we get into that whole
conversation and how we both think about that and it was a
good ass talk. I'm.
Excited. I'm excited to hear because I
think that's a fucking a joke. That's just one big joke.
Yeah, man, you listen to the episode and if you, if you want
to give some feedback, you know,you could do that right on the
(22:02):
episodes description page on Spotify.
Yo, you know what peeves me? What's up?
I'm about to rant. I'm about to rant.
Alright, yeah, yeah, I'm ready for a rant.
I'm ready for a rant. Yeah, yeah.
Like, let's get fired up. I like this.
OK, hit me. When people say my anxiety, my
(22:28):
anxiety, my anxiety, oh, I can'tdo that.
My anxiety, I don't do this. My anxiety, my anxiety, my
anxiety and I'm like, listen, first of all, I'm I'm not immune
to being anxious myself. So just just comes from an
empathetic place, I swear. But that shit pees me yo.
(22:53):
Because people talk about feeling anxious like it's a
Little Rock in their pocket. They talk about it like it's a
possession that like they carry around with them in their back
pocket, like my anxiety, my anxiety.
And it's like stop calling it myanxiety.
(23:14):
That's like that's step one. Stop viewing it, treating it and
talking to it like it's a actualthing.
Like it's a possession that you carry around with you.
Like it's some some skin tag that you have some extra arm or
something. Like, like it's not a actual,
it's not even real actually. You're making it up in your
(23:38):
head, but listen for one reason or another.
But the point is like, it's justa feeling that comes and goes
like every other feeling. That's the that's the life
experience. But every time someone says this
shit to me, I I've started telling people with this and
they've actually like, it's like, damn, that's actually a
(24:01):
good point. I'm like, yo, stop talking about
this. Like like it's a possession
you're carrying around with you.And then maybe like it'll stop
feeling like a rock that you're carrying around with you.
Like just start looking at it. What it is like stop saying my
anxiety, start saying I feel anxious.
(24:23):
That's all my bed ran over. Nah, fair, fairpoint.
I definitely wasn't expecting you to go that route.
You definitely spot like took mefor for a spin.
I thought for real that was going to go in a different
direction. I'm like, that's an interesting
way to frame that because like, if I'm being honest, I didn't
(24:46):
agree with the approach initially, but the end spin
makes me think like when you sayI'm feeling anxious, I'm like,
hmm, it's like now we have a different dilemma.
Let me, let me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bro, I'm rocking with this. Let me throw another spin on it.
(25:07):
Could you imagine if we talked about our happiness the same
way? Like we talk about our anxiety,
like the same way we address andtreat and and approach our our
negative feelings? Like if we talked like my
happiness, we started saying my my instead of saying I'm happy
about this or like I feel good as shit about this.
(25:29):
Like we start saying my happiness like it's a possession
that we carry around with us. Like you think like it would
have the opposite effect. Like everyone would just start
being like fucking happy as shitinstead of anxious all the
fucking time. I mean people.
Would try to do what they can toprotect it more.
Oh. That's that's a whole nother
(25:50):
approach. I feel like people would try
harder to protect their happiness but people would have
to have enough like not give a fuck energy to continue to
preserve it because like people don't like to hear about
(26:12):
happiness. Are you talking about being
happy? Little people just be like fuck
off. Yeah, but just happy ass
motherfucker over here. So like, you got to be able to
look past that and still want tobe like, I'm trying to protect
my happiness. Like, what about my happiness?
But like for some reason, like Iguess society has us all
(26:33):
believing and asserting on each other this idea that like
happiness is cringe, which I've always thought has been so
silly. That's like one of the reasons
why I enjoy like writing poetry or ignoring cringe culture and
making like genuine romantic attempts is because it's like
(26:58):
who the fuck decided like happiness was cringe?
Bro, that's that's cringe yo. Like when did we all convince
each other that like being happywas not cool that like God damn
yo, I I'm not I don't want to bea part of that party like so I
kind of just ignore all that shit.
Now I'm like. What I'm?
(27:19):
Good, I'm good on that. Where is like happiness Cringe?
What? Do you mean where?
I feel like everywhere. I'm not challenging you on this.
I'm like trying to follow with you because you know, we both
well, I don't know. I don't know what you did.
I fucking smoked before the show.
(27:42):
Like is there like a general example you can give me where
you're like, they make happinessout to be cringe?
I feel like genuine romantic attempts are a great example of
a way in which they've made happiness cringe, because I
(28:02):
think at the end of the day, people like to give genuine
romantic attempts when given theopportunity to.
Yeah, people like to receive them.
Yeah, but for. Some reason the idea of them and
talking about them, for a lot ofpeople they like, they like,
(28:24):
that's cringe. I feel you.
Alright. Yeah, yeah.
You know what I mean? Or this idea of happiness is
cringe in general. Like like the idea of like,
yeah, go fuck yourself. Like you're happy.
Nobody's happy like yo. Which is funny because like.
(28:46):
Cringe culture. It's something about like the
specific thing about happiness, like.
Yeah. Like, don't be like if you're
happy for no reason in public, you'll have a problem with it.
It is strange though, right? To be happy.
(29:08):
Yeah. See how weird the conversation
starts getting? No, I'm just saying.
Like listen to the words we're saying.
Listen to the words we're saying.
We're literally proving it. Maybe maybe it's the New Jersey
and me, but like a happy ass motherfucker for no good good
(29:29):
reason out in public. Like just seems strange to me.
Like what the fuck are you so happy for?
Like that's weird. Like when we literally have a
whole TikTok about it, like where I'm when I'm talking about
religious people who like you'renot that happy.
Your life sucks. Like like we have a whole TikTok
about it. But that's what I mean, like
it's crazy. Like society really has us out
(29:51):
here. Like don't be happy.
And then, like, we impress it onthe other people and be like,
don't be happy. You know, no one's allowed to be
happy for some reason. Like, it's against the law.
It's so crazy. It's just like one of those
things I've observed over the years.
Yo, what is cringe culture? Like what constitutes cringe
(30:12):
culture? I'm not.
I'm going to think about this shit for a couple of days now.
Cringe culture. Yeah, like what?
A. Lot of cringe.
A lot of cringe culture kind of came about through Zoomers, like
there's a big difference. Millennials, right?
(30:33):
We had the opportunity to self express.
It was like the last time youth really got the full opportunity
for self-expression and, like experimentation and kind of like
finding who we were without it being forever recorded or
constantly shown back to us because we were like the some of
the first people on the Internet.
Yeah. Yeah.
(30:53):
So like there's like little artifacts of like, our youth and
like us experimenting and finding ourselves and
reinventing ourselves and going through the different cultures
of fashion and everything over the years.
Like, that exists. And like.
But with Gen. Z, it doesn't really exist as
much because they've been under the under the eye of social
(31:15):
media and all of their peers being on social media as well.
So nobody wants to stand out. Everyone's kind of like
accustomed to be like as neutralas possible in many cases.
And in the ways in which they can find ways to express
themselves. It becomes like a specific to
their culture type thing. Yeah.
(31:36):
Like it'll be like ironically cool to express themselves
because expression is cringe because if you express yourself
and you're different from everyone, you'll be judged and
you'll be judged by everyone because everyone's looking at
social media. There's all these eyes.
There's anything any form of like sticking out or going
(32:00):
different ways will like make you more abrasive against the
the rest. But like then you'll have things
that pop up that are like ironically expression that
circumnavigate cringe culture like Crocs where it's like it's
cool to wear Crocs because they're ugly and we all know
(32:20):
they're ugly, but they're comfortable.
And like we can do a little bit of self-expression because it
has like these little things that we can kind of customize
and put who we are like things that matter to us on them.
And like that's a OK or that's athat's a form of expression
that's approved by our peers. Holy shit.
(32:47):
So now there's this like whole younger generation that doesn't
really know how to express and has been afraid to express.
And then you have like breakout people that are expressing
themselves and like really kind of like bringing back this idea
of like it being OK to express yourself in it, not being cringe
(33:08):
in the form of like, I don't know, like music artists.
Like I guess like you could say like Chapel Rhone is like one of
them or who's homie who played in Dune, like he did his whole
acceptance species. Like I tried so hard my whole
life. I took acting so seriously to
(33:30):
make it this far. And I really hope I continue to,
like, be able to push myself andbecome a better actor.
Like, I look up to the greats. I'm trying to be a great actor,
like, one that will be a classicname forever.
Like, this is what kind of journey I'm trying to go on.
And like, even that idea of likebeing so passionate about this
(33:52):
one thing that matters to you has been like considered cringe
for so long because of that. There's like a whole science to
this is like, you've really put me on.
Yeah, it's like a whole psychological.
Soup. Yeah, because like it's like,
(34:14):
uh, it's just like fucking making me face my immortality or
my mortality. What is it?
Immortality, mortality, mortality.
Fucking that's crazy. You just, you have moments where
you just have random memories like some like some you haven't
(34:40):
remembered in years but like it just comes out of nowhere.
Oh yeah, Yep. My, my Nana called me tonight
because she had one of those moments.
Yeah, she almost had me out there on the phone in tears and
oh, man. Because I only because like of
(35:02):
empathy, like I know that she was having a moment whether
yeah, whether she was outwardly expressing that or not.
I know she was like having it onthe inside because she's human.
But yeah, she called me up and she's like she saw something on
TV or had a conversation with someone about a festival.
(35:25):
Maybe we're talking about our our tribes powwow or something
like that and the fairgrounds. And she's like, I just, I just
was sitting here and I was thinking about it and I just
remembered a memory that I had. And she was like, I was at the
fairgrounds or at a festival andmy sister Shirley was there.
(35:48):
And your mom was just a baby andI didn't have a stroller for
her. And your uncle was like 2 years
old and I didn't have a strollerfor him and he was being so bad.
And she said she just remembers walking with my mom as a baby,
holding her and trying to keep an eye on my uncle, who was a
(36:11):
toddler. And she said she just remembers
walking in the festival. And that's all she remembers.
I'm like, that's it. That's just walking around.
She's like, that's all I can remember.
But it just, I haven't remembered that in years.
It came out of nowhere. She's like, damn, time flies so
fast. Just had to be like 75 or
(36:34):
something. 74. And I was like sitting and I'm
sitting in the car while she's having this moment on the phone
with me. And I'm thinking like, I'm
thinking about like, just her being young in the 70s and like,
my, she was a hot Mama back in the day too, but like in the 70s
(36:58):
and she like, had like cool clothes on and like, my mom's a
baby and like, she's got these two young kids.
I'm just thinking about it all. And I'm like, damn, nostalgia is
a motherfucker. Yeah, man.
Hey, hey. If you're like talking about
memories, I like I had AI had I was having a conversation with
(37:21):
somebody and I had, I had said, I said I love memories, but God
do I wish sometimes things were more than just a memory.
Yeah. 'Cause like it really be like
whole moments that you wish, like oh man, you wish so
desperately you could just relive that moment so bad just
(37:45):
to just to be there again. But it's just a memory.
No, yo, that's so crazy because I was just listening.
I was just listening to a Alan Watts fucking lecture the other
night and he was talking about that and he for the first time
(38:08):
ever, like I felt, man, I don't even know how I felt.
It was crazy because he damn, I wish I would have saved that
because I was telling myself as I was listening to it like you
need to clip this so you can show twin boy.
(38:29):
He's like everyone spends most of their life living in a place
inside their mind that doesn't even fucking exist.
It's like we're like he he was saying like the whole point he
started it off saying he was like core memories are.
I forget how you phrased it, buthe said it's just a it's just a
(38:51):
a negative foothold, foothold that keeps you away from like
what's important, what's important, which is the present
moment and that most of us are just living in these almost
made-up places that don't even exist any like well, such I've
(39:18):
no, you're good. It's how you triggered.
I'm sorry, buddy, I'm sorry. I'm really, I really don't like
that whole point of view in general, because it to one, it's
to say that like your core, all your core memories are somehow
negative and don't contribute tolike you positively as a person
or move forward like this, such as the just such a awful outlook
(39:38):
on like what it like one of the most beautiful things about
being human and like being conscious, yes, being able to
appreciate memories and moments and like like, oh, they're just
negative things. Like like the way that being
(39:59):
talked about, It's like, damn, it's so like the way that is
being talked about makes me wantto be like what?
So. So you would just want to live
in a world where when someone close to you dies, you feel
nothing? Like that kind of fucking is a
(40:28):
is so counterintuitive to like what?
I feel like one of the most powerful experiences you can
have as a living human person islike the the power of love in
(40:48):
all its different forms, especially when someone close to
you dies and then all you have left is memories and that love
you felt. But like when people talk like
that, it's like it's like all that shit is somehow just like a
negative thing that holds us back.
(41:08):
Like huh? I don't know, it just feels so
like disrespectful to like what it means to be a human.
The the power and significance of those moments.
Like like those things don't hold as powerful inspirations or
(41:29):
motivational drivers in people'slives.
First thing I want to say is that I agree with you.
I've been practicing Buddhism for 4 to 13 years now and a lot
(41:51):
of what he's saying is just Eastern philosophy and Buddhist
philosophy and Taoist philosophy.
And a big reason why I could never go past the point of just
(42:12):
being a lay practitioner within Buddhism is because I don't want
to forfeit my human experience. I don't want to forfeit the,
the, the experience of feeling things.
(42:34):
So that's why I say I agree withwhat you're saying.
That's always been my foothold that keeps me out of Nirvana is
because I don't want to, I don'twant to break my attachment to
to how I feel within like my human experience.
(42:54):
A Buddhist monk would tell you that the response that you just
had was you experiencing ego death and having a hard time
coming to terms with your attachments, right.
Because the whole point, I guess, like really the whole
philosophy is that like good or bad attachments keep you from
(43:23):
the present moment and the goal is to be as much in the present
moment as possible. So even if it's good things or
things that made you feel happy or good things like you're not
just trying to break your attachments to bad and negative
(43:45):
attachments, but also the good ones too, because the point is
to have no attachments to, to besolely in the present moment as
much as possible. But again, I'm just a man.
So I've always had trouble, I'vealways had trouble with, with
(44:06):
not being able to feel, you know, like I, I, I love, I, I,
I'm, I guess I'm a part of cringe culture because I love
all the things that are apparently cringe.
Like I, I fall in love over cupsof coffee.
I fucking love core memories at the side of the river under the
light with someone that I'm madly in love with.
(44:30):
I love all the feelings that come good and bad, that come
with being a father and just trying to be the best you can be
despite your mistakes. Like I love feeling life so I
feel you bro. I think like what you're, I
think what you're talking about too also discredits the
(44:52):
possibility of like compartmentalism.
Like, like someone like myself, like genuinely, I feel like I'm
able to retain my memories, appreciate my memories.
And like, when I'm in the momentexperiencing moments with
people, I, I, I'm capable of looking at those moments with
new eyes in a sense, like virgineyes in a sense, like, like I'm
(45:17):
able to just dial my brain to zero and just allow it to take
in what is happening right now as like a first time in the
moment kind of experience and just letting it become what it
becomes. Like, you mean like when you're
remembering memories? Like you're remembering them
(45:39):
like a whole new experience. No, I mean like I'm able to walk
through life with my memories, with my, with the, with these
core memories, the good, the bad, these things value them,
appreciate them in the moments where like, I don't know, like
(46:02):
in the lulls of life and like I could, I could appreciate every
single moment. It's a brand new moment.
But like I feel like I do, I, I operate on like 8020 like 80% of
(46:22):
the time, I'm doing my best to experience every moment as a
brand new moment, as a moment that I'm experiencing for the
first time with no other like outside expectations or like
experiences impacting that moment.
And I can let those moments be what they are and exist as their
own thing. And then like 20% of the time
(46:45):
somehow interfacing with like past live experience, sometimes
in those moments, sometimes in like solitude when I'm not
really doing much and I'm just sitting outside.
But like I feel like the way like it gets phrased even in in
(47:06):
the context of like what we're talking about, like they, it
leaves no room for the possibility of like that, which
I just don't see is I feel like a lot of people probably are
capable of that. Capable of what?
Being able to have like, allow themselves to have moments, be
(47:32):
first time moments in a sense, while still holding on to things
like memories. Yeah.
Like not letting those memories in the past and these things are
holding on to kind of impact themoment.
So you, that's wild, man. That's pretty crazy actually,
that you could be like mentally like in two places at once.
(47:57):
And I say that as someone who cannot do that whatsoever.
I feel like a lot of people would be able to do that, no?
Maybe. Maybe I'm just a oddball because
like I'm like, really, because I'm really considering what
(48:17):
you're saying right now and I'm like really thinking about it in
my experience. And I'm like, I, I, you know, me
actually. So like I go down Bunny trails
and I get sucked down all kinds of like rabbit holes constantly.
And like my mind is like all over the place and wandering
(48:38):
and, and it's never here, right here.
I dissociate like a motherfucker.
Like I, I, I have really poor control over like the wandering
of my mind. And it doesn't really sound like
that bad of a thing when you just say it, But like it really
(48:59):
can be a curse sometimes and it's really not always
productive for me. And there's no way, like I don't
even know. Like I don't even know how
that's even possible to like howdo you dissociate but still be
in the moment, like be truly present in the moment, but be
(49:20):
dissociated at the same time because core memories and like
daydreaming and like things likethat.
That is for sure dissociating. So like I'm just like, how do
you do that? Like you can do that both Simon
like at the same exact time. I think like a way to view it is
(49:43):
like maybe like bossing it into disassociation is not a good
framework for explanation because it's more like a, like I
(50:08):
said originally, like a compartmentalization thing.
Right, right. I, I just think like the
suffering of the mind, you know,the sufferings of the mind, the
the being, when you can bring yourself like back to the
present moment. It, it, it, it alleviates some
(50:28):
of that. I know that's the case for me.
I was. Going to say like I, I think
another way to like compare it is like this idea of like what a
clean slate means. Like I'm somebody who, who we
(50:50):
could have the most awful, terrible morning.
We could be like, I would never do this.
But like, I don't know, like pick something in a movie like
where, where a couple is like a wife and a husband are like
having an argument in the morning.
Everyone's grumpy, like things aren't being done.
(51:15):
People's like feelings are hurt,this and that and the other.
And then like 5 minutes later, I'll be like in my mind, I'll, I
can communicate it too. But like I can clean slate that
and I can pretend like nothing happened.
(51:39):
We can throw all that out the window and it can be brand new
right there in the moment, like the day starting right now for
real. And like I can really live that.
And like I will not like the idea of like whatever just
happened will not retain in or impact anything like how I'm
interacting with you. And I feel like it's kind of the
same way like what we're talkingabout like that ability to just
(52:02):
like clean slate any moment and just like start brand new.
Like we're like, we're just going to start breathing right
now. And like this is where we're
starting. It's kind of like the the same
to the idea of like experiencingmoments fresh and with new eyes
and holding on to those core memories still.
I'm following you. Maybe disassociating in the
(52:25):
moment isn't the right word as well, because like.
I mean you could use whatever word helps your framing better,
but like daydreaming and being in a moment at the same time.
I it feels I don't know how to explain it bro like when I use
my brain, it feels like it feelslike a diagram and like I can
(52:47):
like I could like put I feel like everyone is able to do
this. I don't know you just like put
things on hold. It's like, alright, cool piece
of information. Just like set it right here in
the back, chill right there. And like what we're doing right
now is like his own thing. So like, I'm a, I'm a hold this
(53:07):
on hold. It's like it's going to hover
here and just going to sit thereand hover.
Or like it's like background music, but you just put it on
mute. What?
For a moment. Yeah, like you just press the
mute button for a moment and then you're like, that's why I
(53:33):
said the 8020 thing, because it's like 80% of the moments.
Yeah, I'll experience that as like a as a fresh moment.
And then like 20% of the time, it'll be like a moment where
it's being influenced by or enhanced by the awareness of my
(53:54):
lived experience, like mixed in because you kind of have to
choose like which moments you'regoing to experience as new
moments. You get to make a conscious
decision to be like, all right, I need to like tune out all the
(54:20):
noise in my mind. And I'm going to approach this
as like a new experience, like, and like, I'm going to walk
through this as like a basicallylike prepping yourself for a new
core memory. Like you're like, all right, I'm
here. I'm ready to experience.
I think I'm just in too deep. Maybe it's a good practice to
(54:44):
like approach moments to and be like approach it from the
mindset of this is going to be my a new core memory and see how
many little details and moments and everything about what you're
about to experience you retain and keep together in your mind.
(55:07):
And then like the proof of that is like how much of in the
moment experience you were anyways, Anyways, I guess we'll
take that silence as a, as a transition point in the how many
hours are we in? Just one hour, 6 hours.
(55:28):
All right, Damn, it's been a long episode. 6 hours.
That's crazy. I don't know why I'm trying to
do all these little bits, man, leave me alone.
You're like, I know you're like over there shaking in like, man,
he's really trying to like get one out today, like some kind of
(55:51):
some little bit. No, I'm really over here
thinking about like this conversation and like really
trying to wrap my head around it.
Oh damn, my bad. Which like particular part.
I don't know, because sometimes we get so wet into the weeds and
I'm like trying to like keep up with what you're saying, but
(56:12):
also like understand what you'resaying too.
Oh, and and we're talking about feeling.
And it's just like, I don't know, that's just such a crazy
thing to me that like, I don't even know.
I don't want to go back in a circle with this again, but
that's crazy. That's just crazy.
I'm just, I'm going to think about this probably for a couple
of days. Am I?
(56:34):
Am I like misinterpreting my ownexperience?
I, I don't, I don't know becauselike.
Because you sound skeptical in my in my point of view.
I feel like I'm in one of those moments like where I'm asking
myself like, am I crazy? You're making me ask myself if
(56:57):
I'm crazy. I don't know.
I guess like I've it's, I don't know, 13 years is a long time to
be studying like to be like taking in a certain narrative.
So, so I guess I, I've just beentaught that like if you're lost
(57:24):
in a memory or your mind is wandering and you're like, you'd
like, you go on autopilot, right?
Like if you're like an autopilot, you're just going
through the motions and your mind is wandering.
You're in memories, you're in other places, other times, other
whatever. You're not here right now.
(57:49):
Like outside of being an autopilot, like you're not fully
mindful of like the present moment.
So OK, all right. I'm glad you said you agree.
So because that's the part that you have me questioning.
Like maybe that whole narrative has just been wrong, but you say
(58:12):
you agree. So what I'm saying is, how are
you able to be in both places atone time 'cause you say you
agree with what I just said, butthen like this whole
conversation, you're trying to explain to me that like you can
be disassociated, you could be in a Daydream, you could be lost
(58:38):
in the core memory, but still be100% in the present moment at
the same time. Not an autopilot, like fully
mindful, present in the moment. And this whole conversation,
I've been taking it from you like your pushback as you've
been saying that you've been able to do it at the same time
or like 80 and 20. So this whole conversation, I'm
(59:00):
sitting here thinking like, how is that possible?
Like for me, that's like 100% like not possible.
I can't, I can't do that. I can't do that.
And that's crazy. And that's what makes the
challenge of being the practice of being mindful, the practice
(59:22):
of of being mindful would like constantly drawing your mind and
your attention and your focus back to the present moment.
And you got to do that over and over and over again to to keep
yourself as much in the present moment as possible.
Well, when I was I, when I agreed, you had said it keeps
(59:49):
you or like prevents you from being fully in the moment.
Yeah, the idea of like being fully in the moment.
This like 100 in your. Like from the way you're
explaining it, you're talking about like 100% scenario, but
like what I was describing wasn't 100% scenario with like a
8020 scenario. So like in my mind, like it's
(01:00:13):
like. It's two ways.
It's like the one example was like, it's like a background
music, but you just put it on mute sometimes to like be the
100% in the moment, but then other times you have stuff going
(01:00:37):
in the background and you're like 80% in the moment.
And like in that case, it's like, well, I'm still mostly
here. And then if there's like a
moment that's kind of like like,let's say like I'm 80% here, 20%
in the background and I'm about to walk into like I'm about to
(01:01:01):
sit down for dinner with my family, I hit mute.
I'm here 100%. Now I'm going to take this.
I've I'm making the conscious decision to take this moment in
as a brand new experience as like a I'm approaching this is
like with the respect of it having the potential to be a
core memory. I'm going to be fully in the
(01:01:25):
moment. Things are over washing dishes
this and that. Like I'm about to like go back
into like cruise control. All right, background music back
on. I'm like cruising.
I'm like here 80 percent, 20% going in the background, like
running its own thing until likeI decide like this moment or
(01:01:49):
like whatever I'm going through is a moment like I need to be
completely here for. I'm following you man.
Am I contradicting what I just said?
Because in my brain I thought I just like, kind of repeated what
I said. I'm going to I.
Just want to be honest. I'm I'm probably going to learn
more back when I listen truthfully.
(01:02:09):
This is definitely a big just was a big like thought provoker
and I'm I'm going to be like in this rabbit hole for a few days.
I feel like I relate to you too on on this idea though, like
about, but like I, I deal with it differently than you do when
(01:02:29):
you said when you were talking about rabbit holes and like
constantly having your mind drawn around.
But like I feel like that's partof that, like the background
programs running type deal whereit's like sometimes that the
(01:02:54):
struggle to focus on a particular thing comes because
of all the connections that likeyour brain is drawing to
different things. And like sometimes new
experiences help you create those connections.
And then sometimes there's crossover with your past
experiences that allow you to find those new connections, but
(01:03:17):
continue you around or along this like path of never being
able to like stop its search forwhatever.
It's like you're not even searching for anything.
It just kind of keeps going. Yeah.
You're just like wherever the what the river flows type deal.
(01:03:39):
You know what I mean? Right.
And sometimes you just like that's part of that equation on
its own. I don't know, like if I would
personally view that as a something that is an inhibitor
of that process. Like maybe it's corny for me to
(01:04:02):
swing it all the way back aroundto like the the anxiety thing
and be like, I wonder if it's possible for I'm lost in my own
thought right now. So now I have to ask you a
question because I'm like stuck on an incomplete thought.
Do you feel like when you're washing around through these
(01:04:25):
rabbit holes, right? And you're having having being
LED around all these different ways your mind and everything is
taking you? Do you feel like you're fighting
the flow or you're relaxed and just going where it takes you?
I don't know if this answers your question, but my life feels
(01:04:47):
a lot like trying to read the page of a book with severe ADHD.
I don't have severe ADHD, but a severe ADHD person reading a
page of the book and they reallywant to read the book.
The goal is just just read that page and by the time they get
through the 1st, halfway throughthe 1st sentence, they've
(01:05:10):
already dissociated off to something else.
And they get like 3 or 4 sentences in and they realize
they have to just start the whole page over again because
they don't know what the fuck's being said on the page.
Because they just keep constantly over and over and
over and over and over and over and over and over again,
dissociating from the main task and goal.
(01:05:31):
You, you, you picking up what I'm putting down like with that.
Experience. I'm picking up what you're.
Putting down, OK, that's my lifeall the fucking time.
Whatever the goal is, whatever the focus is, like that's my
mind constantly, like repetitively just non fucking
stop just associating, dissociating, dissociating.
(01:05:53):
And it's like I want to be here.I can't be here when I my mind
is other places. You feel me?
I, I can see, I, I can see how see, I don't suffer from
experiencing that all the time. I have like moments in my life
where I suffer from that, but itI'd maybe say it's like 10% or
(01:06:20):
lower. Like I've definitely had moments
like you're talking about and itdefinitely happens.
Like maybe I'm under selling it because like you've seen me so
like you would, I don't know howmany times you feel like I
disassociate a lot, but I definitely don't think I'm
Someone Like You who is like constantly how you're describing
all the time living with it. Really the only thing that stops
(01:06:45):
it, literally the only thing, the only thing is smoking weed.
When I smoke, that's the that's when like it stops and usually
like I can just get over stimulated and start just
fucking ripping about something.I'll lock in on one topic and
then I'll just RIP through it oranything.
(01:07:07):
Just anything. I'm sorry.
No, no, no, no, I, I kind of like that you said that because
like I would, I still want to like reattach to what I was
talking about a little bit before because like, I totally
see how that could get in the way of like, like the me if I
(01:07:28):
put myself in your shoes, I can totally see how what I'm
describing is my experience. Like with my brain is like
fucking you're like, bro, what the fuck?
Like, and when, when it comes toyou're approaching how to
understand what I, what I said I'm experiencing.
Yeah, because that is like just not your experience.
(01:07:49):
Like that is literally just not your experience.
Yeah. So I get I can totally see that.
And that's crazy too, to think from like my point of view
because like that you live that way.
And then for me, we have crossover again, like with with
(01:08:12):
us with the substance, right. We talk about weed.
It's like that's the only time my brain gets quiet.
Yeah. Like my brain is either quiet in
meditation experiencing moments brand new because like when I
experience moments brand new, though, I'm not having
background thoughts anymore. It's like it's almost like a
(01:08:36):
meditating meditation in itself.Because then all I'm having
experiencing in the moment is like true first thoughts.
Like like, let's say I'm there'sa girl standing in front of me
and I'm experiencing what the, I'm having true to first thought
moments where like, wow, like her lips look so great, like her
(01:08:57):
eyes are so pretty like this. And that like things, I'm just
like things that are just at theforefront of my experience in
that moment, in that moment. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Facts. So it's like it's own meditation
thing because otherwise it's like in my mind, my brain is
doing that thing where it's likerun in the background, like
(01:09:17):
processes, yeah. That's a beautiful feeling when
you get to experience like the moment in that.
Way yeah, it is and it's so I find it so interesting that like
(01:09:38):
I wonder why it just quiets the.Because otherwise, right.
I have this of this desire to just have I've talked about it
on the on the podcast before where I just have like 3 tabs
open or like I'll be in a call music playing video open, you
know what I mean? Like multiple sounds going until
like there's this like white noise kind of in the background
(01:10:00):
and then it's like, oh, I can focus on whatever.
You can focus better with all the with all the light different
things going on in the background.
My brain gets quiet. Yeah.
Like my brains either quiet and meditation experiencing moments
(01:10:23):
brand new because like when I experienced moments brand new
though, I'm not having I hate thoughts anymore.
It's like it's almost like a meditating meditation in itself
because then all I'm having experiencing in the moment is
like true first thoughts. Like like let's say I'm there's
a girl standing in front of me and I'm like experience what the
(01:10:44):
I'm having true to first thoughtmoments where like, wow, like
her lips look so great, like hereyes are so pretty like this.
And that like things, I'm just like things that are just at the
forefront of my experience in that moment, in that moment.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's like it's own meditation
(01:11:05):
thing because otherwise it's like in my mind, my brain is
doing that thing where it's likerun in the background, like
processes focus on like whateverI'm doing now.
Because all the all whatever else was buzzing is just, it's
only buzzing now. There's no like actual substance
(01:11:26):
that my brain can latch on to tolike start a rabbit hole.
You feel me? Like if it's just like mush, if
I'm just hearing like a static in my mind, my brain can't latch
on to anything and just start running down a trail.
(01:11:47):
It has to just focus on like, whatever is at hand.
But yeah, that makes sense because like, I guess like we
does that thing, it makes everything quiet for me.
Yeah. Where it's just like, whoa, hell
yeah. Oh man, we dove fucking deep
(01:12:07):
dog. God damn.
Yeah, Yeah, we did. Damn, back up to the surface.
Back up to the surface that was so deep.
I'm not. Yeah.
(01:12:27):
Oh man, where the fuck did that come from?
This is just a little bit of growth therapy, you know, just a
little bit of we just get to target and it's just, and then
next thing you know, it's like discussing the philosophical
(01:12:53):
experience of of life and the subjectiveness of it.
How do you want to write? What should we wrap it up on?
A brand new episode of the Ace Ford Podcast out now.
(01:13:14):
Check it out. Episode of brand new Ace Ford.
Yeah, I don't know. I feel like that's going to be
something that I'm really excited to listen to you.
Got to let me know what you think man.
I I know that that one episode that you did over on that other
guy's podcast that sound like dude who does the honeydew that
(01:13:37):
was the. Oh, yeah, yeah.
Dad in the city, Dad in the city.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was a.
That was a. Good episode.
I like that. I like that.
How'd you how'd that come about?You don't mind me asking?
He, I guess from just seeing, you know, I really don't know
(01:14:00):
what like I'm assumed just what the stuff that I was posting and
saying that I like did podcasts and stuff.
And then he reached out to me randomly and was like, I want
to, I want to try to start my own podcast and like, could you
give me advice? Or he was asking me questions
and stuff and I live for that. So kind of started there and
(01:14:24):
then well, right off the bat I said I, I just invited him onto
my podcast just so he could get like a feel for doing it.
And then he was, he was off on his own from there.
It was a it was a good episode that you guys did together.
(01:14:44):
Yeah, he's like, he's like, I appreciate that his his central
focus is like fatherhood. I really, I think I've said this
to you before, but I really likewhen I get to hear you talk to
people I haven't heard you talk to before.
Because as as your friend, right?
(01:15:06):
Yeah. As like, as someone I hold so
close to me personally, Like, you're my family.
I like when I get to see people that are close to me interact or
listen to them, have like deep discussions with people that
aren't me. I get to learn things about them
(01:15:30):
that for whatever reason, one thing or another, just like in
the in the chemical soup of lifeand all the different
combinations that come about when 2 sacks of chemicals come
together, a different outcome occurs.
And like, it's always really cool seeing like whatever
(01:15:51):
chemical outcome occurs when, when you get together with like
someone I haven't heard you get together with before.
So it's always like a really dope experience.
I appreciate that man. Yeah, man, it's super.
It's super awesome. It's super awesome.
(01:16:17):
Episode 92. Yeah, episode 92.
Love you guys.
Oh shit. Yeah.
Episode 92 of Bro Therapy. Yeah, you got it.
That's plenty of shit. This is the.
(00:20):
This is the. This is.
The this is. The.
This is show for me and my rosestap into our emotions.
It's cool if you want a pole, noego allowed.
This is the place where the mango and free our minds abroad
and stretch out the window. Hot topics.
You gotta test whatever is on your hurry in your mind, if that
(00:42):
makes sense. Speaking about whatever.
No judgment you put in it, let it flow.
Just like what are the other brands you get on my drift.
A point of view for my ones in astory and glimpse.
No feel they say what it is undescripted.
No need to watch what you said. It's the truth.
Hurt. Pro therapy is the meds.
I said this is the pro therapy show.
(01:03):
I said this is the pro therapy show.
This is that uplift to me that has you low.
This is that uplift to me that has you low.
I said this is the pro therapy show.
I said this is the pro therapy. Episode 92 of the Birth Therapy
(01:32):
Show. That's so funny.
I was about to be like, I was like, so we're gonna are, are
the mics high? Then you're like episode 90.
Oh my God. I guess that was shit.
Here we are God damn episode 92.Say something, say something for
me. OK, say something for me.
(01:53):
Solid. All right, all right, now we're
going to now it's episode 92 of the Bro Therapy Show.
Episode 92 of the bro therapy show Cross from me is my partner
in crime. How you doing today?
I'm all right. I I.
(02:15):
You look, you look great today, man.
You look like you're doing good,man.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.How's it been?
This is so cringe what you been up?
Why is this this like feel so like?
(02:36):
You don't like the bit yo scripted yo that's.
Grippy feeling, 'cause you know there's probably motherfuckers
who try to really do that. Today in the news they said.
How you feeling today man? I just ate some St. corn so I'm
(03:01):
like, I'm feeling fantastic. Groovy.
I gotta stop going to the Taco truck stoned.
Yeah, man, how much food you order that?
You, I, I, we're not going to talk about that on record, but.
God damn. Yeah, or how much money I've
given these people in the last month.
(03:25):
Well since we're talking about good food, I'd like to I'd like
to make a shout out to some something I was made aware of
recently by my Co host sitting across from me.
(03:46):
Yo, shout out to Ghana. Apparently big hit you also like
fans of Ghana. Yo, ain't that crazy?
We big love, big love and I and I sat off in the back of the of
good food because I've seen a lot of like food TikTok from
(04:07):
Ghana and yeah, good food definitely looks like amazing
food. Every time I see that so shouts
out yo mad love and mad love andappreciation.
Yo, that's kind of, that's kind of wild, right?
Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, we got, I was going
(04:28):
through the show's emails and wegot, we got some good news and
some confusing bad news that ended up being no news.
But we, we landed, uh #145 out of the top 200 comedy podcasts
(04:49):
in Ghana. I'm like, yo, a win is a win
dawg. For real, I, I saw that you sent
me that and I was just like, well, God damn, yo.
Fucking mad respect to to our toour listeners from Ghana because
like they holding that down. Yo, I'm about to I wonder.
(05:13):
So I made sure when we got on this episode today, I was like,
Nah, we're going to let him know.
Hell yeah. I appreciate the listeners in
Ghana. And we have listeners.
And there was another like just random place that I wouldn't
have. We have listeners in Saudi
(05:34):
Arabia. Hell yeah.
Now does is Dubai, I'm sorry, but I'm not sure is Dubai in
Saudi Arabia or is that its own thing?
Because I'm wondering like, well, yeah, I'm getting more
exposure to that, that region ofthe world.
(05:56):
One of the guys that was in he was a outlaw.
He was that was Tupac's rap group.
He he changed his life around after PAC got killed and he
became like a devout Muslim and he moved to Saudi Arabia.
And he's always like on interviews and stuff like he's a
(06:18):
very peaceful guy. He's always on interviews like
saying how like how nice Saudi Arabia is.
Like, first of all, they have way stricter immigration
policies than we even we do. And we're dealing with some
crazy shit right now. But apart from that, like free
(06:39):
health care, free education. Need I say more?
Yeah. And I agree anyway.
I No politics. No politics.
Yeah, that's Fireman we got we Mr. Worldwide.
(07:04):
Mr. Worldwide shouts out. And then?
Loving love and appreciation to to to both the to both parties.
Hell yeah. Shout out to them.
We got another e-mail that was confusing because we went, we've
(07:26):
been rocking, we've been doing this podcast four years. 11
years. 11 years. Four years, four years and we've
never once. Never once.
Not to say we've been so good about it.
So good. Got a copyright strike?
(07:46):
Never once. Never once in four years and the
whole time doing this. We still don't have one right
technically. Technically, we don't.
It doesn't show it. It doesn't show Yeah all.
Right, so maybe it was a mistakeon their end.
Well, the, the last thing they said in a e-mail was we're, I
(08:10):
guess I didn't get the, I didn'tread the e-mail in time and
respond to them in time. So the last thing they said was
we're going to reach out to the owners of the content you're
using and if they have a problemwith it, then we're going to
(08:33):
strike you. But if it's OK that you're
allowed to use this, then this will just go away.
So but they. Didn't tell us what it was.
But they didn't tell us what it was.
And that's really what I'm bummed out about.
So I can have like a better ideaof what to steer away from.
But it's anyway, we got this e-mail and it was saying that we
(08:57):
got a copyright strike and like we needed to correct this
particular episode or they were going to take it down off
Spotify. And I went through to see what
episode it was and then it popped up that there was no
strikes and there was no episodes to review.
But going off of the day of the messaging from our podcast host,
(09:25):
I think it's called Spotify for Creators now.
It used to be anchor. But anyway, I digress.
It was the date on that. It had to be a episode from
episode 87 and up. So one of our recent episodes
(09:51):
and I went through them all. They're all still posted, but
the only thing I can think of isthat fucking hip hop shit we
were talking about with the Ricoh case and all that shit.
You remember when I played the podcast the of Big you and shit?
Yeah. That's the only thing I can
(10:13):
think of that we played. You think that might be it?
It's the only thing. Should we take it out?
I mean in. Case like maybe they maybe the
maybe they Spotify did reach outand the other party just hasn't
got back to them. Yeah, we'll talk more about that
(10:37):
off Mike. True.
Good point. Right now we have no strikes.
We're good. We're back in good standing.
We're back in good standing. And we got listeners in Ghana.
Listeners in Ghana. Think about that like, yeah,
it's 1:45, but just think that like there's 55 other podcasts,
(11:01):
55 other productions that like people listen to us more and not
like in that. I don't mean that in a negative
way, like they suck or anything.I just mean like if you asked me
honestly in my heart what numberI thought we fell at, I would
tell you #200 so to be like at 1:45, I'm like, oh shit.
(11:24):
That means there's definitely some listens.
Oh hell yeah. And you know what?
And you said Saudi Arabia was #2?
Not #2 just it was just another country.
That was up there. Yeah, well, it was just a
country, yeah, that I didn't expect.
It was just like out of left field.
(11:48):
All right, and, and for the sakeof like conversation, let me
throw like a hypothetical at you.
Like woo, woo talk. We're gonna have some woo woo
time now. OK.
Alright, umm what if instincts right?
(12:13):
DNA, memory retention, these things like that you kind of
just know to do or any living thing kind of knows to do.
Yeah. Or like these deep things like
the fears, like the afraid of the darks, the monsters and this
(12:34):
and that, right? What if there's like a cloud?
Like a cloud equivalent to like universal consciousness.
This gets kind of close to like,what's that, panpsychism?
But like, not really. I'm not talking about
(12:54):
panpsychism. I'm not familiar with that is.
Panpsychism is like the belief that everything has like a
consciousness, like even like a rock, like just but just like
it's different levels. OK.
But like, everything, has a little bit of consciousness
instilled in it all. Right, I'm following conscious
(13:15):
cloud. What's that mean?
Yeah, conscious cloud, like whatif there's like a layer of
dimension or like existence thatpermeates where it's kind of
like the reference of lived experience of like everything.
So when new things are born, it uses the backlogged information
(13:42):
and like codes that into the newthing.
Like it downloads that those like lived memories in a way in
the coding of the DNA, in the same way like a computer or your
phone, like refers back to like storage that you're keeping in
(14:04):
the cloud. So that's why like when new
things are born and something dies, like when it when
something dies, those lived experiences don't just
disappear. Like the memory of the
consciousness like is stored. That lived experience is stored
in this like consciousness cloudair quote.
(14:31):
And when when a new thing is born, it retains some of that
lived experience. And it's like in its encoding in
its DNA. And that's why it knows certain
things from the past to do instinctually to survive as it
gets older or after it's born. Like, think about it like a
(15:02):
extra layer of like reality. I actually, I actually kind of
dig this theory where where likewhat's the connection between
like the conscious cloud and andlike the DNA because like when
you get to the like when you were talking about like the
(15:23):
backlog of memories and stuff when people were born and things
like, I really kind of jive withthat and we could talk about
that in a second. But then when you get into the
DNA part, it kind of just soundslike you're explaining like
genetic memory and like, So what?
Like what's the connection between the two?
(15:43):
Like how did how they play? Like how are they connected in
this theory? I guess like the way they're
connected in the theory would bethe way that DNA gets encoded
with genetic memory is because of the cloud.
I'm following. I'm following.
Like to encode the DNA has to pull the resources like that
(16:07):
information from somewhere and that information is that
consciousness cloud. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm following now. Yo, I jive with it because like
I feel like we see technology aswe like build upon it and
improve it. Like it mimics the, the, the
(16:30):
physical experience very much like we've talked about this
kajillion times where like the camera is a mimic of the retina,
the motherboard is like the, themimic of the brain.
And like so Wi-Fi is spirituality like.
So this theory actually fits right into like all those things
(16:54):
for me. So I jive with it.
What's crazy too in my brain is like that's exactly what
sentient like AI in a in a weirdway, that's probably how we
would describe the way it its life, existence and procreation
(17:14):
like would work, right? I'm following.
Like we would be like, well, it stores all its information,
lived experience in the cloud. And then when new things are
born, it just taps in from that past lived experiences and then
continues to write new code on top of it.
(17:36):
Like that's exactly what like a sentient AI robot would do,
right? Like at least in my brain, this
is how I kind of got to this. Like it was something I was
thinking about this week, people.
And it's funny. It's like people would be like,
how what? I'll ask a question like that
and people would be like, why are you?
What are you? How do you even start thinking
about stuff like this? I'm like, I just have a thought
(17:57):
and I just keep going. So like I'll be quiet for like
the next like 7 hours at work. And it's because I'm just like
working through like a thought in my head and just like
thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking and like
talking through all the different possibilities with
myself. Yeah, it's a pretty cool idea.
(18:21):
I fuck with it, I fuck with it. Bro, were you were you hoping
for pushback or something like for?
Oh, no. For content, No.
I was just interested to see what you thought.
I thought it was an interesting thought experiment, I guess
(18:42):
like. Yeah, man, I dig it.
I had an episode of the Ace FordPodcast drop tonight.
Yeah, you sent me a link. I haven't listened to it yet.
Yeah, first one back in a couplemonths.
I'm excited to listen to it. It's a pretty, it's a chill
(19:03):
conversation. It's pretty dope.
To be real. The a big reason why I recorded
this episode was because probably like six or seven
episodes ago of birth therapy, me and you were having a
(19:27):
conversation and I was trying tolike express to you that like I
hate how much I say like by the way, I've been listening back on
the episodes and it's fucking it's driving you crazy.
It's gross. I was trying to express to you
(19:47):
that dot, when you get pulled over and trucking and or like
the weight stations and everything, it's it's not the
same anxiousness that you get when you have to deal with a
regular cop. It's more so for a lot of truck
(20:11):
drivers. It just, it feels like another
day at the office. It's so like ingrained in like
our everyday work. Life that it's just and
seriously, dot cops are most of the time, most of the time are
usually a lot chiller like they they get it too.
(20:32):
They're like just trying to they're trying to get you back
to it as quick as possible and they're most of the time pretty
cool, especially when you're cool to them.
They're definitely like pretty chill.
So anyway, a friend that I went to high school with, she's a
truck driver and she actually goes all over the country,
(20:56):
whereas I'm just local. And we got into like all those
conversations and like, I just wanted to like create an episode
with like another professional driver where we're like, we talk
about the things we deal with with dot and the weight stations
and the regulations and restrictions that the government
(21:17):
puts on truck drivers. We, we dove into the, the topic
about in Arkansas, it's AII can't believe it's actually
real. I don't know why I'm surprised
about this, but in Arkansas, like they're literally making
truck drivers read and write a sentence in English.
(21:42):
And I'm like, damn. So we get into that whole
conversation and how we both think about that and it was a
good ass talk. I'm.
Excited. I'm excited to hear because I
think that's a fucking a joke. That's just one big joke.
Yeah, man, you listen to the episode and if you, if you want
to give some feedback, you know,you could do that right on the
(22:02):
episodes description page on Spotify.
Yo, you know what peeves me? What's up?
I'm about to rant. I'm about to rant.
Alright, yeah, yeah, I'm ready for a rant.
I'm ready for a rant. Yeah, yeah.
Like, let's get fired up. I like this.
OK, hit me. When people say my anxiety, my
(22:28):
anxiety, my anxiety, oh, I can'tdo that.
My anxiety, I don't do this. My anxiety, my anxiety, my
anxiety and I'm like, listen, first of all, I'm I'm not immune
to being anxious myself. So just just comes from an
empathetic place, I swear. But that shit pees me yo.
(22:53):
Because people talk about feeling anxious like it's a
Little Rock in their pocket. They talk about it like it's a
possession that like they carry around with them in their back
pocket, like my anxiety, my anxiety.
And it's like stop calling it myanxiety.
(23:14):
That's like that's step one. Stop viewing it, treating it and
talking to it like it's a actualthing.
Like it's a possession that you carry around with you.
Like it's some some skin tag that you have some extra arm or
something. Like, like it's not a actual,
it's not even real actually. You're making it up in your
(23:38):
head, but listen for one reason or another.
But the point is like, it's justa feeling that comes and goes
like every other feeling. That's the that's the life
experience. But every time someone says this
shit to me, I I've started telling people with this and
they've actually like, it's like, damn, that's actually a
(24:01):
good point. I'm like, yo, stop talking about
this. Like like it's a possession
you're carrying around with you.And then maybe like it'll stop
feeling like a rock that you're carrying around with you.
Like just start looking at it. What it is like stop saying my
anxiety, start saying I feel anxious.
(24:23):
That's all my bed ran over. Nah, fair, fairpoint.
I definitely wasn't expecting you to go that route.
You definitely spot like took mefor for a spin.
I thought for real that was going to go in a different
direction. I'm like, that's an interesting
way to frame that because like, if I'm being honest, I didn't
(24:46):
agree with the approach initially, but the end spin
makes me think like when you sayI'm feeling anxious, I'm like,
hmm, it's like now we have a different dilemma.
Let me, let me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bro, I'm rocking with this. Let me throw another spin on it.
(25:07):
Could you imagine if we talked about our happiness the same
way? Like we talk about our anxiety,
like the same way we address andtreat and and approach our our
negative feelings? Like if we talked like my
happiness, we started saying my my instead of saying I'm happy
about this or like I feel good as shit about this.
(25:29):
Like we start saying my happiness like it's a possession
that we carry around with us. Like you think like it would
have the opposite effect. Like everyone would just start
being like fucking happy as shitinstead of anxious all the
fucking time. I mean people.
Would try to do what they can toprotect it more.
Oh. That's that's a whole nother
(25:50):
approach. I feel like people would try
harder to protect their happiness but people would have
to have enough like not give a fuck energy to continue to
preserve it because like people don't like to hear about
(26:12):
happiness. Are you talking about being
happy? Little people just be like fuck
off. Yeah, but just happy ass
motherfucker over here. So like, you got to be able to
look past that and still want tobe like, I'm trying to protect
my happiness. Like, what about my happiness?
But like for some reason, like Iguess society has us all
(26:33):
believing and asserting on each other this idea that like
happiness is cringe, which I've always thought has been so
silly. That's like one of the reasons
why I enjoy like writing poetry or ignoring cringe culture and
making like genuine romantic attempts is because it's like
(26:58):
who the fuck decided like happiness was cringe?
Bro, that's that's cringe yo. Like when did we all convince
each other that like being happywas not cool that like God damn
yo, I I'm not I don't want to bea part of that party like so I
kind of just ignore all that shit.
Now I'm like. What I'm?
(27:19):
Good, I'm good on that. Where is like happiness Cringe?
What? Do you mean where?
I feel like everywhere. I'm not challenging you on this.
I'm like trying to follow with you because you know, we both
well, I don't know. I don't know what you did.
I fucking smoked before the show.
(27:42):
Like is there like a general example you can give me where
you're like, they make happinessout to be cringe?
I feel like genuine romantic attempts are a great example of
a way in which they've made happiness cringe, because I
(28:02):
think at the end of the day, people like to give genuine
romantic attempts when given theopportunity to.
Yeah, people like to receive them.
Yeah, but for. Some reason the idea of them and
talking about them, for a lot ofpeople they like, they like,
(28:24):
that's cringe. I feel you.
Alright. Yeah, yeah.
You know what I mean? Or this idea of happiness is
cringe in general. Like like the idea of like,
yeah, go fuck yourself. Like you're happy.
Nobody's happy like yo. Which is funny because like.
(28:46):
Cringe culture. It's something about like the
specific thing about happiness, like.
Yeah. Like, don't be like if you're
happy for no reason in public, you'll have a problem with it.
It is strange though, right? To be happy.
(29:08):
Yeah. See how weird the conversation
starts getting? No, I'm just saying.
Like listen to the words we're saying.
Listen to the words we're saying.
We're literally proving it. Maybe maybe it's the New Jersey
and me, but like a happy ass motherfucker for no good good
(29:29):
reason out in public. Like just seems strange to me.
Like what the fuck are you so happy for?
Like that's weird. Like when we literally have a
whole TikTok about it, like where I'm when I'm talking about
religious people who like you'renot that happy.
Your life sucks. Like like we have a whole TikTok
about it. But that's what I mean, like
it's crazy. Like society really has us out
(29:51):
here. Like don't be happy.
And then, like, we impress it onthe other people and be like,
don't be happy. You know, no one's allowed to be
happy for some reason. Like, it's against the law.
It's so crazy. It's just like one of those
things I've observed over the years.
Yo, what is cringe culture? Like what constitutes cringe
(30:12):
culture? I'm not.
I'm going to think about this shit for a couple of days now.
Cringe culture. Yeah, like what?
A. Lot of cringe.
A lot of cringe culture kind of came about through Zoomers, like
there's a big difference. Millennials, right?
(30:33):
We had the opportunity to self express.
It was like the last time youth really got the full opportunity
for self-expression and, like experimentation and kind of like
finding who we were without it being forever recorded or
constantly shown back to us because we were like the some of
the first people on the Internet.
Yeah. Yeah.
(30:53):
So like there's like little artifacts of like, our youth and
like us experimenting and finding ourselves and
reinventing ourselves and going through the different cultures
of fashion and everything over the years.
Like, that exists. And like.
But with Gen. Z, it doesn't really exist as
much because they've been under the under the eye of social
(31:15):
media and all of their peers being on social media as well.
So nobody wants to stand out. Everyone's kind of like
accustomed to be like as neutralas possible in many cases.
And in the ways in which they can find ways to express
themselves. It becomes like a specific to
their culture type thing. Yeah.
(31:36):
Like it'll be like ironically cool to express themselves
because expression is cringe because if you express yourself
and you're different from everyone, you'll be judged and
you'll be judged by everyone because everyone's looking at
social media. There's all these eyes.
There's anything any form of like sticking out or going
(32:00):
different ways will like make you more abrasive against the
the rest. But like then you'll have things
that pop up that are like ironically expression that
circumnavigate cringe culture like Crocs where it's like it's
cool to wear Crocs because they're ugly and we all know
(32:20):
they're ugly, but they're comfortable.
And like we can do a little bit of self-expression because it
has like these little things that we can kind of customize
and put who we are like things that matter to us on them.
And like that's a OK or that's athat's a form of expression
that's approved by our peers. Holy shit.
(32:47):
So now there's this like whole younger generation that doesn't
really know how to express and has been afraid to express.
And then you have like breakout people that are expressing
themselves and like really kind of like bringing back this idea
of like it being OK to express yourself in it, not being cringe
(33:08):
in the form of like, I don't know, like music artists.
Like I guess like you could say like Chapel Rhone is like one of
them or who's homie who played in Dune, like he did his whole
acceptance species. Like I tried so hard my whole
life. I took acting so seriously to
(33:30):
make it this far. And I really hope I continue to,
like, be able to push myself andbecome a better actor.
Like, I look up to the greats. I'm trying to be a great actor,
like, one that will be a classicname forever.
Like, this is what kind of journey I'm trying to go on.
And like, even that idea of likebeing so passionate about this
(33:52):
one thing that matters to you has been like considered cringe
for so long because of that. There's like a whole science to
this is like, you've really put me on.
Yeah, it's like a whole psychological.
Soup. Yeah, because like it's like,
(34:14):
uh, it's just like fucking making me face my immortality or
my mortality. What is it?
Immortality, mortality, mortality.
Fucking that's crazy. You just, you have moments where
you just have random memories like some like some you haven't
(34:40):
remembered in years but like it just comes out of nowhere.
Oh yeah, Yep. My, my Nana called me tonight
because she had one of those moments.
Yeah, she almost had me out there on the phone in tears and
oh, man. Because I only because like of
(35:02):
empathy, like I know that she was having a moment whether
yeah, whether she was outwardly expressing that or not.
I know she was like having it onthe inside because she's human.
But yeah, she called me up and she's like she saw something on
TV or had a conversation with someone about a festival.
(35:25):
Maybe we're talking about our our tribes powwow or something
like that and the fairgrounds. And she's like, I just, I just
was sitting here and I was thinking about it and I just
remembered a memory that I had. And she was like, I was at the
fairgrounds or at a festival andmy sister Shirley was there.
(35:48):
And your mom was just a baby andI didn't have a stroller for
her. And your uncle was like 2 years
old and I didn't have a strollerfor him and he was being so bad.
And she said she just remembers walking with my mom as a baby,
holding her and trying to keep an eye on my uncle, who was a
(36:11):
toddler. And she said she just remembers
walking in the festival. And that's all she remembers.
I'm like, that's it. That's just walking around.
She's like, that's all I can remember.
But it just, I haven't remembered that in years.
It came out of nowhere. She's like, damn, time flies so
fast. Just had to be like 75 or
(36:34):
something. 74. And I was like sitting and I'm
sitting in the car while she's having this moment on the phone
with me. And I'm thinking like, I'm
thinking about like, just her being young in the 70s and like,
my, she was a hot Mama back in the day too, but like in the 70s
(36:58):
and she like, had like cool clothes on and like, my mom's a
baby and like, she's got these two young kids.
I'm just thinking about it all. And I'm like, damn, nostalgia is
a motherfucker. Yeah, man.
Hey, hey. If you're like talking about
memories, I like I had AI had I was having a conversation with
(37:21):
somebody and I had, I had said, I said I love memories, but God
do I wish sometimes things were more than just a memory.
Yeah. 'Cause like it really be like
whole moments that you wish, like oh man, you wish so
desperately you could just relive that moment so bad just
(37:45):
to just to be there again. But it's just a memory.
No, yo, that's so crazy because I was just listening.
I was just listening to a Alan Watts fucking lecture the other
night and he was talking about that and he for the first time
(38:08):
ever, like I felt, man, I don't even know how I felt.
It was crazy because he damn, I wish I would have saved that
because I was telling myself as I was listening to it like you
need to clip this so you can show twin boy.
(38:29):
He's like everyone spends most of their life living in a place
inside their mind that doesn't even fucking exist.
It's like we're like he he was saying like the whole point he
started it off saying he was like core memories are.
I forget how you phrased it, buthe said it's just a it's just a
(38:51):
a negative foothold, foothold that keeps you away from like
what's important, what's important, which is the present
moment and that most of us are just living in these almost
made-up places that don't even exist any like well, such I've
(39:18):
no, you're good. It's how you triggered.
I'm sorry, buddy, I'm sorry. I'm really, I really don't like
that whole point of view in general, because it to one, it's
to say that like your core, all your core memories are somehow
negative and don't contribute tolike you positively as a person
or move forward like this, such as the just such a awful outlook
(39:38):
on like what it like one of the most beautiful things about
being human and like being conscious, yes, being able to
appreciate memories and moments and like like, oh, they're just
negative things. Like like the way that being
(39:59):
talked about, It's like, damn, it's so like the way that is
being talked about makes me wantto be like what?
So. So you would just want to live
in a world where when someone close to you dies, you feel
nothing? Like that kind of fucking is a
(40:28):
is so counterintuitive to like what?
I feel like one of the most powerful experiences you can
have as a living human person islike the the power of love in
(40:48):
all its different forms, especially when someone close to
you dies and then all you have left is memories and that love
you felt. But like when people talk like
that, it's like it's like all that shit is somehow just like a
negative thing that holds us back.
(41:08):
Like huh? I don't know, it just feels so
like disrespectful to like what it means to be a human.
The the power and significance of those moments.
Like like those things don't hold as powerful inspirations or
(41:29):
motivational drivers in people'slives.
First thing I want to say is that I agree with you.
I've been practicing Buddhism for 4 to 13 years now and a lot
(41:51):
of what he's saying is just Eastern philosophy and Buddhist
philosophy and Taoist philosophy.
And a big reason why I could never go past the point of just
(42:12):
being a lay practitioner within Buddhism is because I don't want
to forfeit my human experience. I don't want to forfeit the,
the, the experience of feeling things.
(42:34):
So that's why I say I agree withwhat you're saying.
That's always been my foothold that keeps me out of Nirvana is
because I don't want to, I don'twant to break my attachment to
to how I feel within like my human experience.
(42:54):
A Buddhist monk would tell you that the response that you just
had was you experiencing ego death and having a hard time
coming to terms with your attachments, right.
Because the whole point, I guess, like really the whole
philosophy is that like good or bad attachments keep you from
(43:23):
the present moment and the goal is to be as much in the present
moment as possible. So even if it's good things or
things that made you feel happy or good things like you're not
just trying to break your attachments to bad and negative
(43:45):
attachments, but also the good ones too, because the point is
to have no attachments to, to besolely in the present moment as
much as possible. But again, I'm just a man.
So I've always had trouble, I'vealways had trouble with, with
(44:06):
not being able to feel, you know, like I, I, I love, I, I,
I'm, I guess I'm a part of cringe culture because I love
all the things that are apparently cringe.
Like I, I fall in love over cupsof coffee.
I fucking love core memories at the side of the river under the
light with someone that I'm madly in love with.
(44:30):
I love all the feelings that come good and bad, that come
with being a father and just trying to be the best you can be
despite your mistakes. Like I love feeling life so I
feel you bro. I think like what you're, I
think what you're talking about too also discredits the
(44:52):
possibility of like compartmentalism.
Like, like someone like myself, like genuinely, I feel like I'm
able to retain my memories, appreciate my memories.
And like, when I'm in the momentexperiencing moments with
people, I, I, I'm capable of looking at those moments with
new eyes in a sense, like virgineyes in a sense, like, like I'm
(45:17):
able to just dial my brain to zero and just allow it to take
in what is happening right now as like a first time in the
moment kind of experience and just letting it become what it
becomes. Like, you mean like when you're
remembering memories? Like you're remembering them
(45:39):
like a whole new experience. No, I mean like I'm able to walk
through life with my memories, with my, with the, with these
core memories, the good, the bad, these things value them,
appreciate them in the moments where like, I don't know, like
(46:02):
in the lulls of life and like I could, I could appreciate every
single moment. It's a brand new moment.
But like I feel like I do, I, I operate on like 8020 like 80% of
(46:22):
the time, I'm doing my best to experience every moment as a
brand new moment, as a moment that I'm experiencing for the
first time with no other like outside expectations or like
experiences impacting that moment.
And I can let those moments be what they are and exist as their
own thing. And then like 20% of the time
(46:45):
somehow interfacing with like past live experience, sometimes
in those moments, sometimes in like solitude when I'm not
really doing much and I'm just sitting outside.
But like I feel like the way like it gets phrased even in in
(47:06):
the context of like what we're talking about, like they, it
leaves no room for the possibility of like that, which
I just don't see is I feel like a lot of people probably are
capable of that. Capable of what?
Being able to have like, allow themselves to have moments, be
(47:32):
first time moments in a sense, while still holding on to things
like memories. Yeah.
Like not letting those memories in the past and these things are
holding on to kind of impact themoment.
So you, that's wild, man. That's pretty crazy actually,
that you could be like mentally like in two places at once.
(47:57):
And I say that as someone who cannot do that whatsoever.
I feel like a lot of people would be able to do that, no?
Maybe. Maybe I'm just a oddball because
like I'm like, really, because I'm really considering what
(48:17):
you're saying right now and I'm like really thinking about it in
my experience. And I'm like, I, I, you know, me
actually. So like I go down Bunny trails
and I get sucked down all kinds of like rabbit holes constantly.
And like my mind is like all over the place and wandering
(48:38):
and, and it's never here, right here.
I dissociate like a motherfucker.
Like I, I, I have really poor control over like the wandering
of my mind. And it doesn't really sound like
that bad of a thing when you just say it, But like it really
(48:59):
can be a curse sometimes and it's really not always
productive for me. And there's no way, like I don't
even know. Like I don't even know how
that's even possible to like howdo you dissociate but still be
in the moment, like be truly present in the moment, but be
(49:20):
dissociated at the same time because core memories and like
daydreaming and like things likethat.
That is for sure dissociating. So like I'm just like, how do
you do that? Like you can do that both Simon
like at the same exact time. I think like a way to view it is
(49:43):
like maybe like bossing it into disassociation is not a good
framework for explanation because it's more like a, like I
(50:08):
said originally, like a compartmentalization thing.
Right, right. I, I just think like the
suffering of the mind, you know,the sufferings of the mind, the
the being, when you can bring yourself like back to the
present moment. It, it, it, it alleviates some
(50:28):
of that. I know that's the case for me.
I was. Going to say like I, I think
another way to like compare it is like this idea of like what a
clean slate means. Like I'm somebody who, who we
(50:50):
could have the most awful, terrible morning.
We could be like, I would never do this.
But like, I don't know, like pick something in a movie like
where, where a couple is like a wife and a husband are like
having an argument in the morning.
Everyone's grumpy, like things aren't being done.
(51:15):
People's like feelings are hurt,this and that and the other.
And then like 5 minutes later, I'll be like in my mind, I'll, I
can communicate it too. But like I can clean slate that
and I can pretend like nothing happened.
(51:39):
We can throw all that out the window and it can be brand new
right there in the moment, like the day starting right now for
real. And like I can really live that.
And like I will not like the idea of like whatever just
happened will not retain in or impact anything like how I'm
interacting with you. And I feel like it's kind of the
same way like what we're talkingabout like that ability to just
(52:02):
like clean slate any moment and just like start brand new.
Like we're like, we're just going to start breathing right
now. And like this is where we're
starting. It's kind of like the the same
to the idea of like experiencingmoments fresh and with new eyes
and holding on to those core memories still.
I'm following you. Maybe disassociating in the
(52:25):
moment isn't the right word as well, because like.
I mean you could use whatever word helps your framing better,
but like daydreaming and being in a moment at the same time.
I it feels I don't know how to explain it bro like when I use
my brain, it feels like it feelslike a diagram and like I can
(52:47):
like I could like put I feel like everyone is able to do
this. I don't know you just like put
things on hold. It's like, alright, cool piece
of information. Just like set it right here in
the back, chill right there. And like what we're doing right
now is like his own thing. So like, I'm a, I'm a hold this
(53:07):
on hold. It's like it's going to hover
here and just going to sit thereand hover.
Or like it's like background music, but you just put it on
mute. What?
For a moment. Yeah, like you just press the
mute button for a moment and then you're like, that's why I
(53:33):
said the 8020 thing, because it's like 80% of the moments.
Yeah, I'll experience that as like a as a fresh moment.
And then like 20% of the time, it'll be like a moment where
it's being influenced by or enhanced by the awareness of my
(53:54):
lived experience, like mixed in because you kind of have to
choose like which moments you'regoing to experience as new
moments. You get to make a conscious
decision to be like, all right, I need to like tune out all the
(54:20):
noise in my mind. And I'm going to approach this
as like a new experience, like, and like, I'm going to walk
through this as like a basicallylike prepping yourself for a new
core memory. Like you're like, all right, I'm
here. I'm ready to experience.
I think I'm just in too deep. Maybe it's a good practice to
(54:44):
like approach moments to and be like approach it from the
mindset of this is going to be my a new core memory and see how
many little details and moments and everything about what you're
about to experience you retain and keep together in your mind.
(55:07):
And then like the proof of that is like how much of in the
moment experience you were anyways, Anyways, I guess we'll
take that silence as a, as a transition point in the how many
hours are we in? Just one hour, 6 hours.
(55:28):
All right, Damn, it's been a long episode. 6 hours.
That's crazy. I don't know why I'm trying to
do all these little bits, man, leave me alone.
You're like, I know you're like over there shaking in like, man,
he's really trying to like get one out today, like some kind of
(55:51):
some little bit. No, I'm really over here
thinking about like this conversation and like really
trying to wrap my head around it.
Oh damn, my bad. Which like particular part.
I don't know, because sometimes we get so wet into the weeds and
I'm like trying to like keep up with what you're saying, but
(56:12):
also like understand what you'resaying too.
Oh, and and we're talking about feeling.
And it's just like, I don't know, that's just such a crazy
thing to me that like, I don't even know.
I don't want to go back in a circle with this again, but
that's crazy. That's just crazy.
I'm just, I'm going to think about this probably for a couple
of days. Am I?
(56:34):
Am I like misinterpreting my ownexperience?
I, I don't, I don't know becauselike.
Because you sound skeptical in my in my point of view.
I feel like I'm in one of those moments like where I'm asking
myself like, am I crazy? You're making me ask myself if
(56:57):
I'm crazy. I don't know.
I guess like I've it's, I don't know, 13 years is a long time to
be studying like to be like taking in a certain narrative.
So, so I guess I, I've just beentaught that like if you're lost
(57:24):
in a memory or your mind is wandering and you're like, you'd
like, you go on autopilot, right?
Like if you're like an autopilot, you're just going
through the motions and your mind is wandering.
You're in memories, you're in other places, other times, other
whatever. You're not here right now.
(57:49):
Like outside of being an autopilot, like you're not fully
mindful of like the present moment.
So OK, all right. I'm glad you said you agree.
So because that's the part that you have me questioning.
Like maybe that whole narrative has just been wrong, but you say
(58:12):
you agree. So what I'm saying is, how are
you able to be in both places atone time 'cause you say you
agree with what I just said, butthen like this whole
conversation, you're trying to explain to me that like you can
be disassociated, you could be in a Daydream, you could be lost
(58:38):
in the core memory, but still be100% in the present moment at
the same time. Not an autopilot, like fully
mindful, present in the moment. And this whole conversation,
I've been taking it from you like your pushback as you've
been saying that you've been able to do it at the same time
or like 80 and 20. So this whole conversation, I'm
(59:00):
sitting here thinking like, how is that possible?
Like for me, that's like 100% like not possible.
I can't, I can't do that. I can't do that.
And that's crazy. And that's what makes the
challenge of being the practice of being mindful, the practice
(59:22):
of of being mindful would like constantly drawing your mind and
your attention and your focus back to the present moment.
And you got to do that over and over and over again to to keep
yourself as much in the present moment as possible.
Well, when I was I, when I agreed, you had said it keeps
(59:49):
you or like prevents you from being fully in the moment.
Yeah, the idea of like being fully in the moment.
This like 100 in your. Like from the way you're
explaining it, you're talking about like 100% scenario, but
like what I was describing wasn't 100% scenario with like a
8020 scenario. So like in my mind, like it's
(01:00:13):
like. It's two ways.
It's like the one example was like, it's like a background
music, but you just put it on mute sometimes to like be the
100% in the moment, but then other times you have stuff going
(01:00:37):
in the background and you're like 80% in the moment.
And like in that case, it's like, well, I'm still mostly
here. And then if there's like a
moment that's kind of like like,let's say like I'm 80% here, 20%
in the background and I'm about to walk into like I'm about to
(01:01:01):
sit down for dinner with my family, I hit mute.
I'm here 100%. Now I'm going to take this.
I've I'm making the conscious decision to take this moment in
as a brand new experience as like a I'm approaching this is
like with the respect of it having the potential to be a
core memory. I'm going to be fully in the
(01:01:25):
moment. Things are over washing dishes
this and that. Like I'm about to like go back
into like cruise control. All right, background music back
on. I'm like cruising.
I'm like here 80 percent, 20% going in the background, like
running its own thing until likeI decide like this moment or
(01:01:49):
like whatever I'm going through is a moment like I need to be
completely here for. I'm following you man.
Am I contradicting what I just said?
Because in my brain I thought I just like, kind of repeated what
I said. I'm going to I.
Just want to be honest. I'm I'm probably going to learn
more back when I listen truthfully.
(01:02:09):
This is definitely a big just was a big like thought provoker
and I'm I'm going to be like in this rabbit hole for a few days.
I feel like I relate to you too on on this idea though, like
about, but like I, I deal with it differently than you do when
(01:02:29):
you said when you were talking about rabbit holes and like
constantly having your mind drawn around.
But like I feel like that's partof that, like the background
programs running type deal whereit's like sometimes that the
(01:02:54):
struggle to focus on a particular thing comes because
of all the connections that likeyour brain is drawing to
different things. And like sometimes new
experiences help you create those connections.
And then sometimes there's crossover with your past
experiences that allow you to find those new connections, but
(01:03:17):
continue you around or along this like path of never being
able to like stop its search forwhatever.
It's like you're not even searching for anything.
It just kind of keeps going. Yeah.
You're just like wherever the what the river flows type deal.
(01:03:39):
You know what I mean? Right.
And sometimes you just like that's part of that equation on
its own. I don't know, like if I would
personally view that as a something that is an inhibitor
of that process. Like maybe it's corny for me to
(01:04:02):
swing it all the way back aroundto like the the anxiety thing
and be like, I wonder if it's possible for I'm lost in my own
thought right now. So now I have to ask you a
question because I'm like stuck on an incomplete thought.
Do you feel like when you're washing around through these
(01:04:25):
rabbit holes, right? And you're having having being
LED around all these different ways your mind and everything is
taking you? Do you feel like you're fighting
the flow or you're relaxed and just going where it takes you?
I don't know if this answers your question, but my life feels
(01:04:47):
a lot like trying to read the page of a book with severe ADHD.
I don't have severe ADHD, but a severe ADHD person reading a
page of the book and they reallywant to read the book.
The goal is just just read that page and by the time they get
through the 1st, halfway throughthe 1st sentence, they've
(01:05:10):
already dissociated off to something else.
And they get like 3 or 4 sentences in and they realize
they have to just start the whole page over again because
they don't know what the fuck's being said on the page.
Because they just keep constantly over and over and
over and over and over and over and over and over again,
dissociating from the main task and goal.
(01:05:31):
You, you, you picking up what I'm putting down like with that.
Experience. I'm picking up what you're.
Putting down, OK, that's my lifeall the fucking time.
Whatever the goal is, whatever the focus is, like that's my
mind constantly, like repetitively just non fucking
stop just associating, dissociating, dissociating.
(01:05:53):
And it's like I want to be here.I can't be here when I my mind
is other places. You feel me?
I, I can see, I, I can see how see, I don't suffer from
experiencing that all the time. I have like moments in my life
where I suffer from that, but itI'd maybe say it's like 10% or
(01:06:20):
lower. Like I've definitely had moments
like you're talking about and itdefinitely happens.
Like maybe I'm under selling it because like you've seen me so
like you would, I don't know howmany times you feel like I
disassociate a lot, but I definitely don't think I'm
Someone Like You who is like constantly how you're describing
all the time living with it. Really the only thing that stops
(01:06:45):
it, literally the only thing, the only thing is smoking weed.
When I smoke, that's the that's when like it stops and usually
like I can just get over stimulated and start just
fucking ripping about something.I'll lock in on one topic and
then I'll just RIP through it oranything.
(01:07:07):
Just anything. I'm sorry.
No, no, no, no, I, I kind of like that you said that because
like I would, I still want to like reattach to what I was
talking about a little bit before because like, I totally
see how that could get in the way of like, like the me if I
(01:07:28):
put myself in your shoes, I can totally see how what I'm
describing is my experience. Like with my brain is like
fucking you're like, bro, what the fuck?
Like, and when, when it comes toyou're approaching how to
understand what I, what I said I'm experiencing.
Yeah, because that is like just not your experience.
(01:07:49):
Like that is literally just not your experience.
Yeah. So I get I can totally see that.
And that's crazy too, to think from like my point of view
because like that you live that way.
And then for me, we have crossover again, like with with
(01:08:12):
us with the substance, right. We talk about weed.
It's like that's the only time my brain gets quiet.
Yeah. Like my brain is either quiet in
meditation experiencing moments brand new because like when I
experience moments brand new, though, I'm not having
background thoughts anymore. It's like it's almost like a
(01:08:36):
meditating meditation in itself.Because then all I'm having
experiencing in the moment is like true first thoughts.
Like like, let's say I'm there'sa girl standing in front of me
and I'm experiencing what the, I'm having true to first thought
moments where like, wow, like her lips look so great, like her
(01:08:57):
eyes are so pretty like this. And that like things, I'm just
like things that are just at theforefront of my experience in
that moment, in that moment. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Facts. So it's like it's own meditation
thing because otherwise it's like in my mind, my brain is
doing that thing where it's likerun in the background, like
(01:09:17):
processes, yeah. That's a beautiful feeling when
you get to experience like the moment in that.
Way yeah, it is and it's so I find it so interesting that like
(01:09:38):
I wonder why it just quiets the.Because otherwise, right.
I have this of this desire to just have I've talked about it
on the on the podcast before where I just have like 3 tabs
open or like I'll be in a call music playing video open, you
know what I mean? Like multiple sounds going until
like there's this like white noise kind of in the background
(01:10:00):
and then it's like, oh, I can focus on whatever.
You can focus better with all the with all the light different
things going on in the background.
My brain gets quiet. Yeah.
Like my brains either quiet and meditation experiencing moments
(01:10:23):
brand new because like when I experienced moments brand new
though, I'm not having I hate thoughts anymore.
It's like it's almost like a meditating meditation in itself
because then all I'm having experiencing in the moment is
like true first thoughts. Like like let's say I'm there's
a girl standing in front of me and I'm like experience what the
(01:10:44):
I'm having true to first thoughtmoments where like, wow, like
her lips look so great, like hereyes are so pretty like this.
And that like things, I'm just like things that are just at the
forefront of my experience in that moment, in that moment.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's like it's own meditation
(01:11:05):
thing because otherwise it's like in my mind, my brain is
doing that thing where it's likerun in the background, like
processes focus on like whateverI'm doing now.
Because all the all whatever else was buzzing is just, it's
only buzzing now. There's no like actual substance
(01:11:26):
that my brain can latch on to tolike start a rabbit hole.
You feel me? Like if it's just like mush, if
I'm just hearing like a static in my mind, my brain can't latch
on to anything and just start running down a trail.
(01:11:47):
It has to just focus on like, whatever is at hand.
But yeah, that makes sense because like, I guess like we
does that thing, it makes everything quiet for me.
Yeah. Where it's just like, whoa, hell
yeah. Oh man, we dove fucking deep
(01:12:07):
dog. God damn.
Yeah, Yeah, we did. Damn, back up to the surface.
Back up to the surface that was so deep.
I'm not. Yeah.
(01:12:27):
Oh man, where the fuck did that come from?
This is just a little bit of growth therapy, you know, just a
little bit of we just get to target and it's just, and then
next thing you know, it's like discussing the philosophical
(01:12:53):
experience of of life and the subjectiveness of it.
How do you want to write? What should we wrap it up on?
A brand new episode of the Ace Ford Podcast out now.
(01:13:14):
Check it out. Episode of brand new Ace Ford.
Yeah, I don't know. I feel like that's going to be
something that I'm really excited to listen to you.
Got to let me know what you think man.
I I know that that one episode that you did over on that other
guy's podcast that sound like dude who does the honeydew that
(01:13:37):
was the. Oh, yeah, yeah.
Dad in the city, Dad in the city.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was a.
That was a. Good episode.
I like that. I like that.
How'd you how'd that come about?You don't mind me asking?
He, I guess from just seeing, you know, I really don't know
(01:14:00):
what like I'm assumed just what the stuff that I was posting and
saying that I like did podcasts and stuff.
And then he reached out to me randomly and was like, I want
to, I want to try to start my own podcast and like, could you
give me advice? Or he was asking me questions
and stuff and I live for that. So kind of started there and
(01:14:24):
then well, right off the bat I said I, I just invited him onto
my podcast just so he could get like a feel for doing it.
And then he was, he was off on his own from there.
It was a it was a good episode that you guys did together.
(01:14:44):
Yeah, he's like, he's like, I appreciate that his his central
focus is like fatherhood. I really, I think I've said this
to you before, but I really likewhen I get to hear you talk to
people I haven't heard you talk to before.
Because as as your friend, right?
(01:15:06):
Yeah. As like, as someone I hold so
close to me personally, Like, you're my family.
I like when I get to see people that are close to me interact or
listen to them, have like deep discussions with people that
aren't me. I get to learn things about them
(01:15:30):
that for whatever reason, one thing or another, just like in
the in the chemical soup of lifeand all the different
combinations that come about when 2 sacks of chemicals come
together, a different outcome occurs.
And like, it's always really cool seeing like whatever
(01:15:51):
chemical outcome occurs when, when you get together with like
someone I haven't heard you get together with before.
So it's always like a really dope experience.
I appreciate that man. Yeah, man, it's super.
It's super awesome. It's super awesome.
(01:16:17):
Episode 92. Yeah, episode 92.
Love you guys.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Bobby Bones Show
Listen to 'The Bobby Bones Show' by downloading the daily full replay.