July 21, 2024 • 53 mins
Ever had an embarrassing moment that involved underwear at Arby's? Trust us, you'll want to hear Chris and Costello's side-splitting story that kicks off our latest episode! We also pay tribute to the iconic Dr. Ruth, celebrating her life and the unforgettable advice she left behind. From jokes about relationship dynamics to our "original cancelled radio guys" mantra, we promise to keep you laughing and maybe even slightly offended. Don’t forget to drop us a line via our contact email – we love hearing from you!
What do Miley Cyrus, George Clooney, and RC Cola have in common? Apparently, a lot more than you think! Join us as we reminisce about the good old days of porch life with classic Southern treats and dive into the surprising musical talents of Miley covering Amy Winehouse. Plus, George Clooney's unexpected op-ed about President Biden has us questioning the political landscape, especially with the upcoming election. Swing states, strategy, and a sprinkle of humor make this segment one you won’t want to miss.
From e-bike disasters in the Rockies to dreamy Hawaii vacation plans, we're sharing our personal ups and downs alongside witty commentary on current events. Ever had an Amazon order go hilariously wrong? Yup, we've been there too. Whether it's reflecting on the quirks of family reunions or considering a move to sunnier shores like Punta Cana and Sarasota, our banter keeps it real and relatable. Tune in next week for more laughs, stories, and a whimsical prize that’s sure to leave you guessing!
Subscribe to 'The Original Canceled Radio Guys' . Go to https://www.ChrisandCostello.com
Email ChrisandCostello@Yahoo.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Hey, hey, this is Chris, hey, this is Costello.
Speaker 3 (00:15):
Oh, we got the bloody video still.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
I love the video.
I know you do.
You know it's good, we're good,but wait a minute Now.
You see, here we go, abc 40seconds.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
I know you don't know , you can forget, but wait a
minute.
Abc Very much.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
All big Clean shaving does make you look about three
months.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
You know about three months ago.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
Three months, yeah, yeah, buddy, that three months
is just gonna make all thedifference in the world, that's
for sure three months ago.
Yeah, three months ago.
Yeah, I'm doing a lot betterthan almost three months ago.
I feel like such a gift becauseI I'm trying to our uh, great
visual effect in half's a happymovie.
Couldn't have said anything.
Pascal said there wereearphones on.
(01:09):
He picked them up.
I could go up to his bed and hehad some laundry on there.
He had socks sticking out, theearphones were hanging off the
left ear there.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
He lied, he lied.
It wasn't a sock, it was aunderwear.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Either way, I think you reminded me of something
about Marion.
You had to turn the clip off ofit and you had to put the clip
off your headphones on this one.
That's it.
Is that what it was?
Yes, what is that it says?
Oh, that's all it is.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
That's all it was not to get excited about.
I had a friend many years agoback in oklahoma you had a
friend, I yes and it was back inoklahoma.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
I don't have many of those no wonder there's lonely,
pretty limb, lonely back there.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
Yeah, this was yeah, no kidding, uh, this was so, so
long ago.
I was working in orbeez, right,so he thought it'd be hilarious
to come in there, and how hegot a pair of mind-aware I don't
know, actually I do.
I don't remember who did that,but anyway, he came in into a
crowded Arby's I'm serving upthere and he picks up the
underwear and goes are theseyours?
Speaker 1 (02:19):
You know, I kind of like that guy already.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Yeah, you would.
Ken was a laugh.
Yeah, he was a dreadful thing.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
That's dreadful.
Before you go, we need to havea, I guess have a moment of
silence here.
Okay, We've lost another one.
You know, All these people aregetting older, so they're all
going bye-bye.
So we've lost another persontoday.
We do, yes, and the death ofthis person is going to affect
your dick Really.
(02:47):
Dr Ruth died today.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
Oh my God, how old was she 96.
Oh, I thought she'd be olderthan that.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
Well, she always looked older because she was
only like 4'10".
She was a very small woman, youknow, to begin with, and so I
guess as she got older sheprobably turned out about 4.1.
I don't know, but she's been.
She always looked old.
I mean, 96 is just a good longtime, that's not a bad one, not
bad.
Yeah, she quit dispensing sexadvice a long long time ago, I
(03:16):
guess, because you know whatthat's right, yes, your answer
with Dr Ruth.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
Why is your penis not fucking?
That's right.
I don't know, doctor, you canfind out for me Because you're
not using it.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Oh, thank you, dr Ruth, you know what?
Speaker 3 (03:34):
That's true.
You don't use it, you lose it.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
so I'm told I think we need a partner.
I do oh, I love him yeah okay,well, on the weekdays, this is
my partner, and on the weekends,this is my partner, and on the
road weekends.
Right to left, right, hand,left hand.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
That's what the Trump dance is all about.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
If you're really flexible, like Costello, you use
one of your feet.
Oh yeah, there you go Now.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
I think we should mention that you are listening
to the originally cancelledradio guys, not originally
original cancelled radio guys,because I realized we start this
thing and it's like well, whothe hell are you?
I'm Costello, that's Chris, andwe need to just let you know
that the reason it's called theoriginal cancelledcel Radio Guys
is because we do things thatyou couldn't do on radio before
(04:28):
and we get in trouble.
We've already did that.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
We're still doing it again.
We are as we like to callourselves, and this is on our
merchandise T-shirts.
We are equal opportunityoffenders.
Offenders yes, no one is safe,and that's just the way it is.
Speaker 3 (04:47):
And it's usually us being remarkably stupid, but we
do like to make you laugh and itdoes happen.
We do also, of course, haveChris and Costello at Yahoocom.
You know, I checked that.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
Yeah, there's like 700 emails there Not to be
confused with Yoo-Hoo, which is,you know, I kind of like it you
don't drink Yoo-Hoo.
You never drank Yoo-Hoo.
Speaker 3 (05:08):
Oh, that was that chocolatey stuff.
No, no.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
Look, this is fantastic.
Yoo-hoo man.
Well you know you're not a sonof the South, like me, but we
grew up with Yoo-Hoo and MoonPie.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
I came from a place where we are a little more
sophisticated than that.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
Well, you live in the South now.
I mean you should be going tothe corner market and get you a
Yoo-hoo and a Moon Pie.
Send your front porch and watchthe world go by.
That's what you do With abottle of Yoo-hoo.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
Yeah, you're a southerner in the summer, you
don't?
Speaker 1 (05:37):
have to do anything else.
You sit there and get yourYoo-hoo, have your Moon Pie,
stuff your face and just watchyour neighborhood Moon pies.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
I like, I like moon pies.
Moon pies are great.
And then, what's your down withyour RC Cola?
Right.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Yes, and if you have to, you can replace them with a
Little Debbie, okay.
Speaker 3 (05:56):
Oh, little Debbie cakes.
Yeah Gosh, all these are reallytasty.
They're so bad for you.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Or, in your case, you would like a little Miley, but
it's okay, I hear by the way,that I shared a lot of Miley
Cyrus when she was in a Montanathing when she was 12.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
You know what we were talking about?
That song Back in Black right?
Yep, amy Winehouse did.
I found a copy of Miley Cyrusdoing it, and boy, it's good man
.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
It's just a good song .
So I like Miley, I'm sure withher type of voice.
Yeah, oh, it is Kind of close.
Amy's would be really good andit's interesting Kind of close
to Amy's.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
It would be really good.
I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, Iam, I am, I am, I am, I am, I
am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
I am, I am, you fall to the world, I die in a hundred
times, but then you go back toher and I go back to you.
He left no time to regret.
(07:35):
He kept his dick wet With hissame old, same bed.
Me and my head high and mytears dry.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Get home without my eyes Interesting.
You know that.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Something new from Costello today.
I have a question for you, sir.
Do you like George Clooney?
Speaker 3 (08:03):
George Clooney's a fine actor.
You think so?
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Yes, he's also got an incredible walk.
Yeah, she's pretty.
I like her.
She's smart.
Do you like him as a humanbeing, even though we don't
really?
Speaker 3 (08:16):
know him Well.
I mean, I think he appears tobe a very pleasant person, likes
to play prank.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
He's kind of a funny guy, good sense of humor.
I wonder why he I was justsurprised he threw Biden under
the bus, you know.
I mean, he's like a majorcontributor to him and to
Democrats in general.
He even told Obama in advancethat he did this.
(08:45):
His op-ed was coming out in theNew York Times and Obama knew
about it in advance.
He didn't try to talk him outof it or stop him.
He didn't tell Biden it wascoming, he just went.
I'm playing back on this one.
So it's just really bad becauseyou're trying to.
You got all this group tryingto defeat Trump, okay, and we
all don't want to see that prickback in for another four years.
(09:06):
I mean, who knows what the hellwill happen?
He wants to wipe out all kindsof stuff that we've had in this
country forever.
It's just scary.
Having all this division isjust not good.
As you go down to home stretch,I just, you know, I just don't
get it.
You know well, I've seen themedia pick so up to an incoming
president before.
It's like you're going to stayin.
You're going to run Every timehe speaks.
(09:26):
You're like waiting for him toscrew up, you know.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
But he's been doing that a lot hasn't he, Mr Perlman
?
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Well, they all do Start putting some video on
Trump again.
I mean good, he fucks up moreall the time.
God, let it go.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
Do you know what Trump's been doing?
He's been in Mar-a-Lago.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
What has he done?
Speaker 3 (09:46):
He's been in Mar-a-Lago talking to the, I
think.
Is it the Romanian presidentfor life?
Yeah, I mean.
But it's like he had, like youknow, the same kind of little
tea party with Putin and KimJong-un who else has he done?
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Well, there's the Project 2025, which is scary.
He wants to get rid of theDepartment of Education.
I'm going to cut back, and cutback Medicaid.
I'm going to cut back yourSocial Security.
I'm just going to cut it off.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
Yeah, I was going to say.
I read that I thought, wow,this is one hell of a piece of
propaganda for the Democrats.
But it turns out to be true.
We're going.
Oh my.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
God, this is scary.
People got to realize what thehell's going on here, you know.
So make everybody feel better.
Okay, so I mean Biden, as youknow, he's putting himself out
there.
He goes.
The more I'm out there, themore people see that I'm okay.
Maybe the better people feeland I'll give me that two or
three percentage points ahead ofTrump, which is all he needs to
win that everyone thinks, okay,biden will probably win the
(10:44):
popular vote, but he's going tolose the electoral vote?
Hope not.
He just got to win a couple ofthose key States that Trump's
counting on and this, you know,like he did last time when
Georgia, again he's got to winMichigan, ohio, pennsylvania.
At least get a couple of themknock out the electoral thing so
he wins.
So he's, he's out there.
He was in Michigan yesterday.
He's going to all these keybattleground states.
He's going look at me.
(11:06):
He always tells people, folks,I'm okay.
Since he's doing his big mediatour to show you how desperate
he is to let you know he's okay.
He's coming on this show rightnow.
If he's coming on here, youknow he's pushing big time and
putting himself out there.
It took an awful lot to get himhere?
Speaker 3 (11:26):
no, it didn't last year.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
This never happened this year.
No, not a problem.
Can he come on the show onetime?
You know, right now.
So here he is.
I don't want to hold him upanymore.
He may fall asleep here he isour president, Joe Biden.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Wait, I'm the president.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Yeah, you are.
You know, look, you're notstarting off really good.
And don't call your vicepresident Trump either.
Ok, I thought you said I wasthe president.
Look, you're not helpingyourself here.
What we want to do, simply, sir, is put everyone at ease and
give you a simple cognitive test.
Can we do that?
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Is that OK?
I don't know what that means,but let's go.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Just here we go.
We I don't know what that means, but let's go, here we go.
We're just going to say a wordand you spit out the first thing
that comes to mind when yougive your word okay, oh, this
should be good.
Yeah, you dribble.
Okay, so here's the first one.
All right, dog Bite Old.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
Me Cold Hot Bologna Correct.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
Hot, not Jill.
Okay, oh Loser.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
Hunter man, transgender.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
What?
How do you say woman?
What is transgender?
Okay, all right.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
Next word Trump, a big fat orange blob criminal,
lying golf-cheating bastard witha piece of anic insulation
stuck to his head.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Well shit, I think he's perfectly fine.
Based on that answer, he passedthe Cognitive Test.
You're great, mr President, youpassed, congratulations.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Do I get a trophy All ?
Speaker 1 (13:13):
right, get a freaking trophy, just go out and stump
and just win the damn electionso we don't have that idiot.
Okay, thank you, sir.
Take your pills, sir.
Take your pills, sir.
Take your pills.
Go do a rally, do something.
Okay, thanks for dropping by,we appreciate it, sir.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Thank you, go win this damn thing.
You're welcome God.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
I tell you Please go win.
I think he said hey.
Based on that last answer atthe beginning, I'm going to get
the right answer.
You mentioned Trump.
Yay, he came alive.
Speaker 3 (13:48):
Do you know what would do this, though?
Is this Article 25, right?
If everybody looked at that?
Now I just found it by accident.
It's like what is this shit?
Now I know what it is.
That's scary.
I mean, it really is.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
You're asking people to read.
Holy crap.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
People don't read, but they need to they.
They really, really should.
Speaker 1 (14:09):
I mean, of course they should.
If they did, they'd start to go.
Well, wait a minute and they go.
And of course he's denying he'sa part of that trump is, but
it's not true, because most ofhis former staff members and
stuff who created it he's.
He'll distance himself againstthat, distance himself against
anything, just to get myselfreelected Once he's in there.
Just think about it.
(14:30):
No matter what happens, whetheryou think Biden's too old, you
want somebody else.
You're going to call his partydivision, whatever, no matter
who they throw at Trump, you'vegot to vote for that person.
Just think about it.
Do you want on day one?
Do you want the dictator?
Speaker 3 (14:47):
That's the thing You're going to get a dictator.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
That's where you get the Hitler thing.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
I was just trying to find it online, here you said it
later We've got Hitler going onnow.
Everybody go look it up.
You will not believe it.
You'll just like going whatReally yes?
Speaker 1 (15:07):
ladies and gentlemen, this is when you hear Trump the
dictator yelling like that inGerman.
It makes you wonder what he'ssaying.
I mean, does anybody even knowwhat he's ranting about there?
Did he actually say for allthose people, I'm going to kill
millions of people, I'm going totake over all Europe.
Does he actually say that?
Speaker 3 (15:24):
Probably not, that's what.
Trump said that's his ideal.
I'm going to take over thewhole world, kill everybody
except for me.
Speaker 1 (15:32):
Here's the funny thing.
I hate to keep talking about it, but it's just so top of mind.
We can't keep talking about BenAffleck and Jennifer Lopez.
Who gives a shit?
Get together, get divorced,just get on with it.
Ok, so we don't care.
But did you say it's scarybecause everyone's going
democracies online?
That's the Democrats line.
Democrats are saying yeah,you're right, democracy is
(15:52):
online.
Joe Biden's running democracy.
I'm going what no, joe Bidendidn't.
In what way Democrats arerunning democracy?
In what way?
Speaker 3 (16:05):
You know, listen, his son took up.
Son stood up and took a bow theother day and he's like 6'7"
he's a baron.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
He's a tall kid.
He's going to be a basketballplayer.
Melania's going to thebackground.
She's going to spend all of hertime to help raise her son.
So hopefully he would be awayfrom all this stuff, not hear
all this stuff, not be a awayfrom all this stuff, not hear
all this stuff, not be a part ofall this stuff.
Doing the best she can.
It's kind of hard when that'syour freaking dad imagine having
that as a dad.
(16:34):
I mean well, not too much.
How many times have you seenfather and son together?
I think he went to hisgraduation, and that's about the
only time I've ever seen thoseguys together, I don't know
forever.
That's about the only time I'veever seen those guys together.
You know, I don't know forever.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
So that's that's true , you don't right?
I was thinking about that theother day.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
I wonder if he's still alive yeah, I can hear
millennia raising your son.
Remember your father's a pieceof shit.
We don't need him in our lives.
We're just here for the money,okay well, the money's nice
place to live here, marMar-a-Lago, we have our own
living quarters.
We don't have to see him.
No, you don't have to play golf.
You know he's a loser.
(17:11):
He sucks.
Hopefully he'll be dead soon.
Don't worry about it.
Okay, keep feeding them.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Mcdonald's should do it.
Remember when he had his firstinaugural dinner.
Remember that and it.
I remember when he had hisfirst inaugural dinner.
I remember that and it was oh,it was McDonald's.
It was McDonald's.
Yeah, I can't remember who thedinner was for a sports team it
might have been like a newsomebody.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
Can you imagine?
You're excited.
You worked hard, you achievedsomething, you get invited to go
to the White House to berecognized and there on the
table is a bunch of frigging BigMacs.
Oh God, oh, don't get mestarted.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
We've got to change stuff okay.
We really do.
This is, of course, theoriginal canceled radio.
Guys with Chris and Costello.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
Yep, that's what we mean Equal opportunity offenders
.
We're all over Trump.
We had fun with Biden earliertoday, so it don't matter, we're
all good.
Yeah, yeah, we just had toround it out.
We need to bring in Lizzo.
No, let's skip that.
Oh God, lizzo, wait a minute.
I got an update here.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
I was trying to remember her name last week.
Speaker 1 (18:22):
I update here the update.
I was trying to remember hername last week.
I can't update about.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
Lizzo here it is you ready, right?
Speaker 1 (18:27):
New news on Lizzo.
Come on, lizzo, give me Lizzo,she's still ready.
Here it is.
She's still fat.
Yay, she hasn't been doing herOzem, she's still canceled, I
guess, in a way, right, she'svery canceled, she cancels
herself anyway.
Yeah, that's true.
I'm trying to figure out whathappened here.
I've got one of those e-bikes,electric bikes.
(18:49):
I'm here in the Rocky Mountainsso it's very steep and stuff.
So having that power is kind ofgood.
I can go further than aneighbor go up and down these
big hills.
So I'm going to scoot down onmy e-bike earlier this week.
All right, I'm kind of far fromthe it freaking just dives on me
.
Okay, I'm going shit and it'slike it showed the thing before
(19:13):
that showed full power, but I'mstuck.
I'm gonna heal like this and itdives on me.
I'm going, and without thepower, because you can, you can
pedal along if you want to, butwhen the power totally off and
there's no assistant, thissucker weighs a ton.
It's, I got a big one.
It's really hard to pound, butI'm screwed, you know.
So I it, I turn it off, give ita second and it comes back.
It's going to be okay.
(19:34):
Hit the gas, I'm going shit.
I had to coast and push andcoast and push and climb.
It took me about a freakinghour to get home.
It's good exercise, yeah, greatexercise.
I was in traction, traction.
I was in bed for two days, okay.
(19:55):
So I'm trying to read here whatkind of troubles you, what I
have to write an email, becauseI got an email in the back of my
manual here.
It says you have physicalproblems, call this place.
So they said send this, sendthis and send this, send a
little video, show your problem,send a serial number and an
order number from like you knowwhen you bought it, so on and so
forth.
And so I sent all this stuff infor them.
That made me work for it, right, and they go.
(20:16):
Oh well, I see you didn't buythe bike from one of our
manufacturer stores.
You bought from a sub store.
So, and based on the year modelof your mic, a bike two years
old, just so you know.
Uh, you know, we don know.
We can't cover parts for it.
It's too old.
You don't carry parts on yourstuff from two years ago.
(20:36):
How do you service anything?
We'll have one of our technicalexperts drop me a note and see
if we can help walk you throughit, but we can't help you with
any parts.
If I've got a part problem,then I'm screwed, you know.
So it's like a Highland.
There's so many brands I don'tknow if it's a Highland, you
(20:57):
know.
Speaker 3 (20:57):
Highland.
Is it just maybe a softwareproblem?
Perhaps I don't know.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
So I'm going to have to go check all my connections,
check that panel again.
I'm afraid to go take a testdrive.
I'll be stuck down the freakinghill again because the only way
I get out of here I've got togo down steep hills.
If it dies on me I might haveto be pushing this freaking
thing all the way back.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
That's where you get your wife to follow you in the
car.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
But this is so big.
The biggest car we have is aLand Rover.
It won't even fit the landrover in the back.
It's just big.
It's like a, it's like a Harley.
I mean, it's just for an e-bike.
I'm in there pushing this thing.
All these other neighbors inthe e-bike, I'm just going you
prick.
You know I'm just waving.
(21:41):
Hey neighbor, I'm just going.
Fuck you.
Thanks for not helping.
Damn, it's kind of hot here inDenver.
Right Yesterday was 102.
Here in my athlete it doesn'tfeel.
It's okay, it's dry, I don'tcare, it doesn't feel bad.
They're having a big fit overback in Vegas where I'll be
(22:02):
going in a week because I gohalf and half.
They had 115 degree plus sevendays in a row and it's still
going.
I'm glad I've missed thatstraight.
I don't want to be in for that.
Speaker 3 (22:17):
Maybe you won't be able to make it next week.
There's no real reason for youto go there.
That's it really.
I work part time, but you workfrom home, so you don't have.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Sometimes I have to go see people in person.
Some people want to be seen inperson, yeah, even though we try
to do everything virtual.
Some people who are especiallythe local, because we have
people come from all over, fromdifferent areas and states, of
course, obviously they're allvirtual and sometimes it's
boring because they don't get tomeet me in person, because I
don't want to set things up forthem.
But the local people who livethere they want to come in.
(22:52):
You know they want to see theright person in person.
That person would be me.
So I have to go at least onceevery three, four weeks or so.
You know it's OK.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
So I'm trying to stretch this.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Wait for the heat wave to calm down.
I have to go down.
You have to wait until.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
September for that to happen.
Speaker 1 (23:11):
It's like 115 every day is a little bit more.
It's going to calm down nextweek.
It's going to get down to about100, 203.
That doesn't bother me, that115 plus it just beats you up.
They sent me back last week inVegas.
This week it's 120.
A hundred and friggin' twenty.
Speaker 3 (23:28):
Believe me, I know it , I know it, I know it.
When I worked there I was acameraman for a lot of the ESPN
fights and Showtime HBO.
We used to do them outside inseasons.
You got this nice bowl of heat.
Anyway We'd be out there andthere's just tarmac.
(23:49):
Oh God, it was miserable and itwould get way past 120 because
of the reason.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
I know With that video camera stuck to your ear
it'd melt to your ear.
I like that Underwear on yourear today.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
You know, stuck to your ear, you know, and they
were the big ones too, not thelittle baby ones.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Oh, hell yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:08):
I can remember I think I told you this story last
week where if you look at thosebig dial thermometers, right,
they have a little stick to stopthe dial from going further
around 120.
Well, most places it never evengets close, but there, of
course, the dial or the littlehand is hanging on this little
(24:28):
stick thing.
So someone said, well, what ifwe took the stick thing off?
That's how hard it is and itwas yeah to stop the dial going
past 120.
Yeah, okay, and it did.
It went up to like 130.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
Well, I was out there playing golf last year and I
thought well, you know, it'ssomething like 102.
Today I'm going to go out.
I'm going to go out.
I'm going to go out like 2 or 3in the afternoon when no one's
out there.
So I've got the whole course tomyself.
There's a reason for that, butsome holes are kind of low.
They have thermometers that letyou know what's going on, so
take care of yourself.
So I'm in one hole.
I said I'm not feeling so goodand I checked the mic.
It was 129 degrees.
(25:05):
You know, in that hole, icedtea and I'm like I couldn't.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
Oh, the heat, the heat.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
You're in the sticky south of South Carolina.
What have you got going ontoday?
Speaker 3 (25:23):
We've got part of the cloudy 95.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
No, yeah, but you've got humidity like 80% plus.
You know the humidity heretoday, just so you know, is 9%.
You're sneaky.
Speaker 3 (25:36):
It's at least 50%, if not more, expecting some
showers later on, which will benice.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
Let's go and piss everybody off.
I'm going to tell them somenews.
Tell them where you're going.
Take a little trip them whereyou're going.
Take a little trip Everybody.
Where are you going?
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Go on.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
Throw it out there Going to Hawaii.
Speaker 3 (25:59):
You suck, Sorry.
My daughter said they werehaving a conversation and she
said, oh, my friend's going toHawaii.
I said you know, I've neverbeen there.
She said, oh, we're going.
I said no.
She said you and me we'll go,We'll take Abby too.
I go okay, Okay, yeah, Wow.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
Shit Okay, which means they're buying you a
ticket.
She's buying me a ticket.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
Yeah, and where are you staying?
We'll find a hotel, a Motel 6,I suppose we'll find a hotel, a
Motel 6, I suppose Everybodyputs you up.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
So you're going to Hawaii.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
See, this shows that you raise your kids right a
certain way, that they aregiving back to dad they're going
to send you to Hawaii.
Speaker 3 (26:46):
I think Allison's idea is that if it goes really
nice, all the things that haveplagued me recently will all go
away.
I like that thinking.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
You know, when you go there you get the ocean breeze
and the beauty of the wholeplace.
Speaker 3 (26:58):
I may not come back.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
I can't have any stress going on at all, you know
.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
You're going to do your part of the show when
you're in Hawaii.
I want it outside, we want tosee what it looks like and stuff
.
So just plan on that, okay.
Okay, it is planned.
So we'll be looking at you.
We'll be looking at how sereneand content you are.
The rest of us back here willbe nothing but a wind-up ball of
freaking stress, okay.
Speaker 3 (27:22):
Yeah, going with my two daughters.
It should be fun because wetravel well together.
It should be fun?
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Of course it would be fun, you asshole.
You're going to Hawaii okay,never been.
You're going for free andyou're going.
Oh, it should be fun.
Speaker 3 (27:36):
You could go to Hawaii with some horrible people
, and that would ruin the wholething, wouldn't it?
What If you went with yourin-laws?
I don't know what your in-lawsare like they're dead.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
So yeah, that'd be fine.
We can take the urn.
Speaker 3 (27:53):
We'll take the urn with us.
Okay, Put them in one of thevolcanoes so they can get an
idea.
Speaker 1 (27:58):
So when are you taking this trip?
When are you going to Hawaii?
When?
Speaker 3 (28:02):
I don't have the actual.
It's between October andFebruary, as you said.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
Oh, I thought you were going sooner, later this
year.
Okay, oh, I thought you weregoing to say later this year, no
, no.
Later on there's a possibilityyou could be doing Christmas in
Hawaii.
Speaker 3 (28:16):
There's a possibility , unlikely.
It's very, very, very, very,although these things never
happen to me.
So I'm truly grateful to mydaughter.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
Well, this is the way it's supposed to be.
All right, you sacrificed a lottime, money, whatever, because
you wanted to raise kids.
Of course, it's your choice tohave kids.
You can be a shitty parent bybeing a good parent.
They went through a lotdivorced, their mother's, gone,
all those things.
(28:49):
Here you are, you've been therock.
You've divorced, their mother'sgone, all those things.
And here you are, you've beenthe rock you've been.
Now it's like you give back tothe parents in every way you can
.
I did the best of mine.
I didn't do that.
I didn't tell you why I wentcrap, but I tried to do
everything I could, the best Icould.
Speaker 3 (29:06):
She gave you that bike, didn't she?
My daughter.
Speaker 1 (29:07):
Yes, she gave you that bike, didn't she?
My daughter?
Yes, she did.
Yeah, yeah, she gave me thatpiece of shit bike and he
straightened me down the hill.
Speaker 3 (29:18):
You ungrateful kid Just kidding.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Love you.
No, it's not her fault.
Speaker 1 (29:21):
You know, I let them know what was going on with it
because they had to send me theorder number and stuff.
So I got to send it to them sothey could trace it back to what
they could do.
They're not happy about iteither.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
It's not your fault.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
It's just one of those things.
We'll get it fixed one way orthe other, so not to worry about
it.
Speaker 3 (29:38):
I'm still waiting for my vacuum cleaner to turn up
Vacuum cleaner.
I bought a Hoover floor cleanerslash vacuum cleaner, who cares
?
Speaker 1 (29:50):
You bought that.
You all care.
You tell your kids to buy itfor you.
What the hell are you buying itfor?
Speaker 3 (29:54):
I bought it and it's never turned up.
I'm still waiting for it toturn up.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
It came from.
Was that an Amazon thing?
Yeah, from Amazon.
My wife just bought somebirthday stuff for one of her
grandkids through Amazon.
It showed it was delivered, butthey never got it.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Exactly Same thing, same.
Speaker 1 (30:11):
thing.
Speaker 3 (30:12):
It happens.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
I mean they do 80 gazillion deliveries a day.
I mean none of it's going to beperfect, so I think you're
really good about making amends,though, so you'll be fine.
Speaker 3 (30:20):
Well, I hope so, because I'm almost up to my chin
with dog hair.
Well you've got to vacuum.
I can't vacuum.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
We did, we had to pull the dog hair out of the
bottom of the vacuum.
We had to do that this week too.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
Fun stuff I heard about your trip, though.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
The first thing I did , I emailed my daughter.
I went to Costello's.
Kids are taking me to Hawaii.
I said so, where are we going?
Speaker 3 (30:47):
And I got back we're not Not going Dad, Sorry, I said
how about Florida she goes no.
Oh, oh, downtown Denver.
Well, no, they'll take us how?
Speaker 1 (31:02):
about the creek in your backyard.
We could do that possibly.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
Oh well, never mind.
Well, you've been to all thenice places anyway.
Speaker 1 (31:13):
I have not, well, I have not been to Hawaii.
I've been to probably everyplace in the Caribbean, you know
Well.
You've been to Jamaica, puertoRico, dominican Jamaica, cayman,
you know, st Barts, costa Rica,all that stuff.
So that's all great.
So I've been to Europe.
I've been to your home.
I've been to Europe.
I've been to your home.
I've been to London a couple oftimes.
(31:34):
Love it, love it, love it.
That's one place I haven't been.
People tell me half and halfPeople love Hawaii, or some
people just go what's the bigdeal?
I'm just going.
I can't say anybody would thinkit's not a big deal.
I know it's expensive.
It's got to be beautiful, right?
Come on.
Well, let's hope so.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
I mean, if it hasn't burnt.
It was on fire this last week,I think that's Maui.
Speaker 1 (31:59):
Is it burning?
Speaker 3 (31:59):
again, Again, oh great yeah and I think that's
where we're planning to go toMaui.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
Well, there's the burnt part and there's the part
that wasn't touched.
It's still pristine and looksgreat.
The best place to go is Maui orWaikiki.
If you're going to one of those, I hear you're going to be in
great shape.
We have a lot of people inVegas who I work with and have
met, who are Hawaiians, and theytell me that's the place to go.
They have family back there.
The only reason they left andcame to Nevada is because they
(32:28):
didn't want to.
It's just so expensive to livethere, based on what they do for
a living and stuff.
Even though the money's okay,it's just not enough to have a
good life in Hawaii.
So they wanted to have a betterlife.
So they have a nicer house, abetter life, no money worries
living in Nevada, but, man, theysure miss Hawaii.
Speaker 3 (32:46):
Oh yeah, they call it the Fifth Island or something.
Speaker 1 (32:49):
Oh yeah, they call it the what, the Fifth Island or
something they do.
Yeah, that's what they call it.
And you, you prick, you'regoing for free so that's all
right.
Speaker 3 (32:57):
Well, I'm sorry, I mean, it hasn't happened yet.
Speaker 1 (32:59):
No, you're not sorry.
Speaker 3 (33:00):
Yeah, you're not sorry at all.
Speaker 1 (33:03):
It hasn't happened yet so I mean you know Well,
they wouldn't bring it upEverything they bring up they do
.
I mean, you know, they wouldn'tbring it up Everything they
bring up, they do.
Your kids are great, everythingthey say they're going to do,
they do you know.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
Yeah, well, again, we'll have to see.
I think priority on my end isto not be a certain boy, or at
least not here.
Anyway, I think we need to movefrom Columbia.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
Yeah, no shit.
We tried to have to move thereto begin with, so I don't know
what you're doing.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
Get the hell out of here see, yeah, like I said, I
must definitely be listening.
Actually, she's going to Spainbefore that.
Oh shit, jesus Christ.
Speaker 1 (33:42):
Stop it, Good God man .
Speaker 3 (33:46):
Well, I mean she works very hard.
I mean you know she does lotsof overtime.
She has a reason to do overtimenow and she's a 911 operator,
so it's a pretty high-stress job.
Speaker 1 (33:58):
That's another place I want to go.
Spain is just like high on thelist.
Everyone who's ever been hassaid that's one place you have
to go.
Have you been there?
Yes, I have.
As good as they say it is.
Speaker 3 (34:11):
It was a long time ago.
I was a kid, but I do remembervague bits.
I've seen it on TV.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
I've seen it on TV.
Speaker 3 (34:20):
You've been there, go check out the architecture.
That's what I would do.
Speaker 1 (34:24):
I'm just.
I'm due for a vacation.
Usually I go at least someplaceonce a year.
Twice a year I like to travel.
It's been like two years.
It's a big stretch for me, ohcome on Wait a minute.
Speaker 3 (34:38):
You had a vacation when you went to the convention
last year.
Admittedly, it was just downthe road from your house.
Speaker 1 (34:48):
That's here in Denver , you know also.
I know house, but that's that'shere in denver, you know also,
I know it's another bigconvention related to what I
used to do and own, and it'sthis year and it's also here in
denver.
So I'm going hey, I'll go that,just check it out for a day,
see some people and say hi, andjust that'll be that.
But I need to, I need a roadtrip pretty really bad.
(35:09):
We're thinking of two thingshere.
What we're considering is oneis going to Punta Cana in the.
Dominican Republic.
Speaker 2 (35:17):
Where is it?
Speaker 1 (35:19):
The Dominican Republic.
Punta Cana it's a beach townthere in the Dominican Republic.
It would be really nice.
A lot of people recommend it.
We have a friend who owns twocondos there.
He goes.
If you go, you can stay therefor free.
That's the big allure there.
It's kind of like you, youfreeload to Hawaii, I'm going to
freeload to the DominicanRepublic, or we're considering
possibly going back to Sarasota,florida, to go check it out
(35:42):
again because we have aninterest possibly of moving
there.
So I said I told my wife, Isaid we're going to go there.
It's still kind of hot, so youcan see what summer feels like.
So you need to see if you candeal with that it could happen
yeah, yeah, because you're bornand raised in Colorado so you
(36:03):
don't know what the humidity islike in summer down in Florida.
So you've got to go down therefor a few days and just
experience that, see if youthink you can deal with that
Shouldn't be too bad.
Speaker 3 (36:11):
I mean, you've got the coastal breezes and things.
It looks like a really niceplace.
Speaker 1 (36:16):
I checked it out.
It's a really she really likesit.
We have no issue with theplaces.
It's really pretty.
It's kind of tough here.
We live in the mountains.
We love the mountains.
When you're away from the beachfor long enough, you want to go
to the beach.
You miss the mountains.
People who live at the beachvacation the mountains.
As long as you can have accessto go back and forth to both.
(36:38):
What's the problem?
This is true.
The difference is, if we wereto live there, we'd be bypassing
all the snow.
I don't mind the snow, Iactually like the snow.
Snow and everything it has it'splace there is like we'd be
bypassing all the stuff.
Speaker 3 (36:51):
I don't mind the snow .
I actually like the snow, snowand everything.
It has its place Out of mydriveway.
Turn your driveway heater on.
That's hilarious.
Speaker 1 (37:05):
I was talking to one of the people I work with and
she's from Hawaii.
I just go okay, she goes everyday.
The part you're going to okayEvery day Never changed.
Every day.
The high is between 78 to 82,every freaking day.
Speaker 3 (37:20):
I suppose that could get a little old.
Speaker 1 (37:25):
No, it's not too hot, it's not too cold.
That's really a greattemperature to be at.
It is Perfect, you're going outthere.
It's not too hot, it's not toocold.
I mean, that's really a greattemperature to be at.
Yes, it is Perfect, you'regoing out there.
You're not sweating a day.
It's 78 to 82 every day.
Imagine living like that.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
Right, I'm packing my bags.
Well, you are, because you'regoing there.
That's awesome.
I'm already going there, I'mnot going to live there.
Speaker 1 (37:48):
You may go.
I'm leaving Columbia Somewhere.
Speaker 3 (37:52):
Somehow Yep when I'm ready to roll.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
There's a guy who's become a friend of mine.
He's not from Hawaii, but helived there before and wants to
go back.
But he's on oh the.
Speaker 2 (38:08):
Elvis guy.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
No, someone else.
He only has so much.
It's like fixed income.
He gets disability, but headded it all up.
But he found a place to livethere and it's like 600 square
feet, you know so.
But he gets to go back thereand live and it's like $900 a
month in Hawaii.
I'm just going.
Are you kidding me?
You know so.
So he's moving there and he'sgoing to live like that.
(38:33):
He's going to downstate sellinga lot of his stuff but
obviously there's no storage orwhatever.
But he goes who cares?
On the beach every day, 70 to82 degrees every day.
Speaker 3 (38:48):
So damn giving up everything else is important
just to live that lifestyle.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
You could do that in Cozumel too, perhaps Mexico.
Yeah, why not Mexico?
Why not?
Yeah, I know people that'saffordable.
Very affordable Going back topolitics.
If Trump wins, you have to lookat these other options.
He'd go move somewhere for fouryears and then come back if
there's anything left.
Speaker 3 (39:10):
If that happens, we'll see.
Speaker 1 (39:13):
It can't happen.
Don't let that People.
America we're talking toAmerica Don't let that happen.
You don't like Biden?
Understand, think he's too old,understand.
But look at the alternative.
That's just all there is youhave to look at.
Look at the alternative.
That's all there is you have tolook at.
Biden can't make it.
You've got President KamalaHarris.
What's wrong with her?
Do you have a problem with her?
(39:33):
She's fine, she's smart.
She was a freaking prosecutor.
She's educated, she's schooled,she's pleasant, she's nice,
she's not 95.
She's less than 100 years old.
Bingo, just to make you feelreally sad, today I'm doing slow
(39:54):
cooking, a pork roast.
I'm doing pulled pork barbecue.
Today I'll be right around, man, you should come by.
Last night I cooked a whole redsnapper.
I like to cook, you know.
I got the whole snapper.
I love cooking the whole fish.
That's great.
A whole red snapper.
You cut into it and he's likewhat did you do to the whole
fish Head, tail, everything.
(40:16):
It's really good.
Speaker 3 (40:17):
If you're supposed to boil the head, it's supposed to
be very good.
Speaker 1 (40:21):
I can grill them.
No, no.
Speaker 3 (40:25):
Boil it later for soup.
Speaker 1 (40:27):
I grill them.
No, no, I mean boil it laterfor soup.
Well, it's a good stock, yeah,fish stock, you know.
So it'll be like you know, fish, that I can fry it.
I'm just going.
I don't like fried food, so Ijust really coat it well, made
it really citrusy with a lot oflime juice and some seasoning,
put them on the grill.
Man, he was good.
So flaky and moist.
I'm getting hungry and todaywe're doing barbecue.
Speaker 3 (40:47):
You're making me damn hungry now I'm making my
homemade coleslaw.
Speaker 1 (40:51):
My homemade coleslaw I already made this.
Speaker 3 (40:57):
You made that when we were down in Florida.
I remember that.
Speaker 1 (41:02):
I made the crawfish, then Maybe that crawfish boil
outside.
How good was that?
Huh, I made that crawfish then,man.
Speaker 2 (41:09):
Maybe that crawfish boil outside.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
How good was that?
Huh, I made that crawfish boiland you guys never had it before
and there was nothing left.
The whole damn thing.
You ate all the sauces, theshrimp, the crawfish, the corn,
the onions.
You ate everything.
Speaker 3 (41:24):
That was us fighting over the last one.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
Yeah, I got homemade coleslaw barbecue and also I
made my salad, my strawberry redonion radish, my dressing salad
it was great.
Speaker 3 (41:36):
I remember you went over that trouble and somebody
said I don't like this.
Was it dope, perhaps I don'tremember somebody's, that's why
we don't speak to the prickanymore, okay, he yeah, he sent
me something was really rudemonths and months ago.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
He was really drunk, it was very obvious and then
like, uh, we could wait a joke,mr religion, mr mr badness,
southern badness, billy grahamjr was yeah, yeah exactly, and
then he, then he sends me hey,how are?
Speaker 3 (42:05):
you doing?
Oh yeah, it's like you don'tremember the last thing you sent
me, so I just sent that back tohim.
What was the last thing thatyou sent?
Here's why I'm not talking toyou right now.
Speaker 1 (42:17):
Oh, because he thought we were rude and we're
ugly and we're nasty and we'rejust dumb people.
And I think he just didn't likethe fact that we make fun of
him because we give out the DokeAwards.
Speaker 3 (42:28):
Well, you know, I mean, we don't do things like
that anymore.
We should do some more stufflike that.
Speaker 1 (42:34):
Well, if we could make a symbol of a Doke Award,
we'd make just something of aplatelet of his teeth.
Okay, and just give that out.
Speaker 3 (42:46):
You know how to hit a man where it hurts.
Speaker 1 (42:49):
Well, look at this one.
We first met and worked withhim some 30 years ago.
He was a young guy in his lower20s.
He thought, well, he'll takecare of that.
So he reaches out like 30 yearslater and we go, we think he'd
be different, right?
Well, it looks like he's givingbirth in his third trimester
and his teeth are the same asawful as always.
(43:10):
And 30 years of that built up.
Obviously you got gum diseaseand the breath could just like
melt.
This whole microphone.
Speaker 3 (43:20):
Unfortunately, it's all true too.
Speaker 1 (43:22):
Yeah, you were just being honest.
Go to the freaking dentist.
Okay, I mean, has he everhonest?
Go to the freaking dentist?
Has he ever been in his life?
Speaker 3 (43:29):
Probably not.
Speaker 1 (43:31):
There's probably only one dentist in West Virginia
and he's probably not that busybecause he's going.
Oh, once he comes, the word ofthe day for Doak and he's never
done.
This is floss.
Speaker 3 (43:46):
And brush and sw, floss and brush and swill and
everything, everything.
Speaker 1 (43:52):
Anything oral, just do it.
Speaker 3 (43:53):
Mouthwash, mouthwash.
Speaker 1 (43:57):
You know how can you get your life.
Speaker 3 (43:59):
We can't all be perfect, but there you go.
Speaker 2 (44:01):
I wonder what he means.
Speaker 1 (44:03):
He likes to write songs that no one records or
thinks are any good or gives ashit about.
He should write a song abouthis teeth.
Speaker 3 (44:11):
That'd be great.
I woke up one morning to findmy baby gone.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
I breathed on her and she we call Bucky yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:24):
Oh yeah, bucky's, I found my baby gone.
I turned around and breathed onher.
Speaker 1 (44:31):
He called Bucky.
Oh yeah, bucky's.
Yeah yeah, I found my baby gone.
I turned around and breathed onher.
Did you ever hear a song thatDope wrote?
Did they ever show you somelyrics, or maybe try to sing you
one?
You ever heard anything that hewrote?
Never did?
Does he write Christian music?
Is that what he writes?
He writes Christian music.
Does he Christian country?
Well, country is Christianmusic.
Is that what he writes?
He writes Christian music.
Does he Christian country?
Well, country, is Christianmusic Christian country?
Right?
Yeah, not that my dog died.
(44:52):
I'm drunk.
I lost my truck.
I screwed my neighbor's wife.
Speaker 3 (44:57):
He probably did that and I broke a tooth.
Yeah, that would be him.
Speaker 1 (45:00):
He wouldn't write that.
He's Mr Goody Goody, MrSouthern Baptist Christian boy.
Yeah, he is.
I'm Doe from West Virginia.
Speaker 3 (45:09):
I'm a God-fearing hillbilly boy, I'm also a
trumpet.
Oh God, I forgot he is, isn'the?
Oh, big time, big time.
That's why we got into a fight,and that was years before we
really realized what we had onour hands, holy shit.
What he got really angry aboutwas I put on Facebook or
(45:30):
something I said you know, heyman, the emperor has no clothes.
Remember that.
Yeah, the emperor has noclothes, and he didn't like that
.
He didn't get it either.
He didn't.
What are you talking about?
He don't have no clothes.
He's probably got more clothesthan you ever had.
What are you talking about?
He don't have no clothes.
He's probably the more clothesthan you ever had and probably
the best clothes, because heonly has the best clothes and
they probably tell you that hehas the best clothes.
(45:50):
You know, he's got clothes he'sgot, he's got wardrobes full of
clothes.
Speaker 1 (45:54):
Another other freaking, you're missing the
point when you're talking to anuneducated west virginia country
boy, I mean, what do you youexpect?
Well, I would have thoughtthat's the thing you've got.
You know, doakie's athird-grade graduate.
Speaker 3 (46:14):
Going to go for a dip in the cement pond.
Speaker 1 (46:16):
He went to first.
He went to Jethro Elementary inWest Virginia.
Speaker 3 (46:21):
Yeah, but where were those guys from there?
Epson Buddy Epson, I think.
He was from West Park Gold, theJethro Clampett family.
One of those guys from there,epson Buddy Epson, I think he
was from West.
Speaker 1 (46:30):
Park Gold the.
Speaker 3 (46:30):
Clamping family.
This is taking a reallyinteresting turn.
No, it's been fun, it's been afun turn.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
It's been great.
Speaker 3 (46:41):
I love picking on the .
We can pick on Doak.
No, it's just that we should.
There just hasn't been anybodyother than Biden to pick on
right now.
Speaker 1 (46:51):
Well, I think that's why the media is so much over,
because they're sick of playingTrump speeches where he spews
out stupid shit every day.
So it's like, oh, this isgetting kind of old, so I got
something new to go on now.
So, like I said, you can't.
There's the Clooney thing.
That kind of made some peoplekind of surprised by it.
Alec Baldwin his case wasdropped yesterday.
(47:12):
Yeah, that was brilliant If wecan't follow the trial anymore.
I'm happy for him because itwas like a trumped-up stupid
shit anyway.
So it's really sad the womandied, but I don't think it was
any intent on his part.
Speaker 3 (47:23):
Oh any intent in this part?
Oh, none, none.
Speaker 1 (47:25):
It's not his job to make sure there's real bullets
in the gun or not.
He's the actor, okay.
Speaker 3 (47:30):
I thought, you know, when his defense was making that
first speech, the younger guyof the two, he was brilliant.
I'm going, you know, after that, are you even going to continue
with this?
You know, if I was a judge I'djust go.
That's it.
Speaker 1 (47:43):
Throw the case out.
See what money and good lawyerscan do for you.
You know.
Speaker 3 (47:48):
Like when I have my lawyers.
Speaker 1 (47:49):
They're going to score a plea.
I'm just going.
Well, wait a minute.
This is fight.
Now just take a fucking plea.
Speaker 3 (47:53):
Yeah, we don't want to go, we don't.
Oh, these suck.
I had an attorney who I hadthis case, if you remember, with
the heating system here thatkilled me with the gas thing,
and everything.
Speaker 1 (48:10):
You're sucking in poisonous fumes at night when
you're sleeping.
Speaker 3 (48:12):
And he dropped the case.
He said, well, I just don'tthink I'm up to this, I go.
What I could do, this, I coulddo this, they're not paying him
enough.
Speaker 1 (48:24):
They're looking at it .
He's only paying me me so much.
It ain't enough for me to dothis.
I asked my guy once I go, weneed to do it.
He goes.
You know it's going to cost youthis, this and this.
If we go do that, there's arisk that this, this and this
could happen.
What do you want to do?
Everything he laid out was likedon't freaking do it.
Speaker 3 (48:41):
Same shit you went through Same thing, yeah, yeah.
Well, after this week They'llbe sick.
Speaker 1 (48:50):
Oh, you know, you know what.
Speaker 3 (48:53):
You're breaking up there For some reason.
Speaker 1 (48:55):
Alec Baldwin's a free guy, dr Ruth is dead.
I mean, I mean.
Speaker 3 (49:00):
You know what's the point In continuing man.
Speaker 1 (49:03):
Ellen DeGeneres Is trying to do Her final stand up
tour.
She's going, she goes.
She canceled a lot of days.
She's got a few more left.
She goes.
When I'm done, I'm going to berecording a Netflix special.
When that comes out, I'm donewith show business forever.
You'll never see me again.
Really, I'm good with that.
I'm okay.
I'm okay.
I mean for a while there, hershow was the shit.
(49:24):
When it came to Dave Tynan, theEllen show was big shit.
Speaker 3 (49:26):
Remember when she was before she came out.
Everyone's going oh, come on,she's gay.
Speaker 1 (49:31):
Oh yeah.
And then when she came out thatwas a big deal on the show.
That was good.
I give her credit for that.
Her show was a shitful lot, butyou could tellictive, you know,
and you know, I don't know.
So it's just, and I guess shehad that toxic atmosphere at
work.
So I just let her go.
She wants to go, she goes.
(49:53):
I've been canceled twice.
Well, you know one thing youcanceled because you came out.
That wasn't your fault.
But you came back strong.
Your daytime show was great.
This time you're canceledbecause it was your fault.
This time you're canceledbecause it was your fault.
Speaker 3 (50:05):
You did do something wrong.
Yeah, yeah, I was thinking ofthe sitcom show she was doing
originally.
Speaker 1 (50:11):
Well, that's when she said she was canceled the first
time because she came out ofthe gig.
And then the show was canceledlike a year later and she says
because of I don't know, it justran its course, but she came
back for the daytime show.
Good for you.
You did a great run 19 years,but you're canceled now because
of you.
Now she's doing this Netflixspecial where they're paying her
millions.
(50:32):
She goes, I guess.
So you get so much freakingmoney in the bank, you don't?
Speaker 3 (50:37):
Yeah, you don't Talking of that, talking of so
much money when I found out Ilooked at my account that I used
to have to pay my car off right.
Yep, and I'm looking.
This is like plus 500 bucks.
I got 500 bucks out of the dealdid ellen, send that to you.
(50:58):
I guess I'll send it to me, butit's like I'm in the state when
they're going 500.
Do I owe them?
No, no, isn't that nice 500bucks out of nowhere.
Speaker 1 (51:07):
They gave you 500 bucks for whatever you overpaid.
Speaker 3 (51:11):
Yes, I guess I overpaid at some point.
Speaker 1 (51:13):
No, okay, did Doak send you some money as an
apology?
Speaker 3 (51:20):
Did Doak send me anything?
You know, I think maybe I willmove to Myrtle Beach after all.
Speaker 1 (51:25):
You know what Doak sent you he to Myrtle Beach
after all.
You know what Doug sent you hesent you an autographed copy of
his book.
He did.
Speaker 3 (51:35):
One of tens, not thousands but tens.
Speaker 1 (51:38):
Of course you opened it right away and started
reading it right away.
Right, you know I did In fact Iread it, you did.
Speaker 3 (51:46):
I think I still have it here somewhere.
Speaker 1 (51:47):
You went to the chapter about radio to see if
you were in it.
Speaker 3 (51:51):
I never did.
Do you remember what chapterthat was?
Speaker 1 (51:55):
I never seen the damn book.
I don't know.
You didn't send it to me.
Speaker 3 (51:57):
Guy hates my gut, oh I was going to send it to you,
hang on.
Speaker 1 (52:07):
I'll talk about his dental hygiene and him being a
stupid redneck kid, but hedidn't think too much of me.
Oh, he does too.
Imagine that.
Hopefully, everybody can lookat the professional backdrop of
Costello's house, the gray sheethanging up behind him okay,
that is, it's covering up hisunmade bed Shit.
Speaker 3 (52:24):
That is actual photograph.
Speaker 1 (52:27):
Is that a yellow stain on that?
Speaker 3 (52:28):
sheet oh stop.
Speaker 1 (52:30):
There it is.
A crazy journey A crazy journey.
You got a picture back.
You don't see the picture.
Is he smiling?
I don't see them.
Teepas, there he is.
Look at him.
Snaggletoothies, uppers andlowers are all fucked up.
Speaker 3 (52:50):
Now, the thing of it is, though, everything.
Speaker 1 (52:53):
The thing of the Opie barber who got his hair like
that, Jesus.
Speaker 3 (52:57):
He honestly hasn't changed in 35 years.
No, not a bit.
The thing about this is thislovely book that he wrote.
He was a salesman at Super 102WVSR in Charleston and so, of
course, being a salesman, hewrote this book about some of
(53:17):
the things that had happened.
Right, and we're in, chris andI are in here.
We've never actually found it.
Speaker 1 (53:23):
yet I don't have the book to even look at it.
So if you find it, you have totell me what it is.
Speaker 3 (53:29):
I'll have to.
Obviously now is not the timeto do this.
Speaker 1 (53:32):
I wrote something.
I work with these two assholeswho are on air personalities
there and they're going to hellbecause of the way they're.
Speaker 3 (53:38):
But the funny thing is Joe Walsh, E-Z-E-N-N-W-A.
Keith Sweet and Billy OceanC-E-N-N-W-A.
Keith Sweet and Billy Ocean,Ready for the world.
Speaker 1 (53:48):
Where's the chapter that he wrote about that he's
never been with a woman?
Speaker 3 (53:54):
I don't know what do you call that blow up of a
girlfriend of his what's wrong?
Speaker 1 (54:00):
Yeah, he did.
Speaker 3 (54:01):
Was he paying her or something?
Speaker 1 (54:03):
He was paying her.
Speaker 3 (54:04):
Oh no, he's paying her Something.
Oh, here we go.
Thanks to my lifetime offriends growing up from St
Albans, we don't mention exactlythe sighting, isn't it?
Speaker 1 (54:22):
On that note we're going to end today's show.
The squealer once again goesback to dope.
Okay, Indeed, here we go.
It just sounds like a familyreunion when you play the
squealer.
The dope family Happy to seeeach other.
Speaker 2 (54:41):
Wee, wee.
Speaker 1 (54:57):
Wee Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant stuff.
The Doak family reunion.
Speaker 3 (55:05):
There you go, yep, the Doak family reunion.
Exactly what that was.
How did you guess you gettoday's grand prize?
Speaker 2 (55:14):
Whatever that may be.
Speaker 3 (55:17):
Well, the only thing I've got here is a bit of honey,
so maybe you can have.
This is your prize.
Empty wrapper there you go.
Speaker 1 (55:26):
That's the next cancellation prize.
Thanks guys, We'll talk to younext week.
Speaker 3 (55:31):
Empty, sweet Wrapper of Life.
Okay, mate, goodbye, bye.
Speaker 1 (55:34):
Leave studio, there you go.
Hey, hey, this is Chris, hey, this is Costello.
Speaker 3 (00:15):
Oh, we got the bloody video still.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
I love the video.
I know you do.
You know it's good, we're good,but wait a minute Now.
You see, here we go, abc 40seconds.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
I know you don't know , you can forget, but wait a
minute.
Abc Very much.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
All big Clean shaving does make you look about three
months.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
You know about three months ago.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
Three months, yeah, yeah, buddy, that three months
is just gonna make all thedifference in the world, that's
for sure three months ago.
Yeah, three months ago.
Yeah, I'm doing a lot betterthan almost three months ago.
I feel like such a gift becauseI I'm trying to our uh, great
visual effect in half's a happymovie.
Couldn't have said anything.
Pascal said there wereearphones on.
(01:09):
He picked them up.
I could go up to his bed and hehad some laundry on there.
He had socks sticking out, theearphones were hanging off the
left ear there.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
He lied, he lied.
It wasn't a sock, it was aunderwear.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Either way, I think you reminded me of something
about Marion.
You had to turn the clip off ofit and you had to put the clip
off your headphones on this one.
That's it.
Is that what it was?
Yes, what is that it says?
Oh, that's all it is.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
That's all it was not to get excited about.
I had a friend many years agoback in oklahoma you had a
friend, I yes and it was back inoklahoma.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
I don't have many of those no wonder there's lonely,
pretty limb, lonely back there.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
Yeah, this was yeah, no kidding, uh, this was so, so
long ago.
I was working in orbeez, right,so he thought it'd be hilarious
to come in there, and how hegot a pair of mind-aware I don't
know, actually I do.
I don't remember who did that,but anyway, he came in into a
crowded Arby's I'm serving upthere and he picks up the
underwear and goes are theseyours?
Speaker 1 (02:19):
You know, I kind of like that guy already.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Yeah, you would.
Ken was a laugh.
Yeah, he was a dreadful thing.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
That's dreadful.
Before you go, we need to havea, I guess have a moment of
silence here.
Okay, We've lost another one.
You know, All these people aregetting older, so they're all
going bye-bye.
So we've lost another persontoday.
We do, yes, and the death ofthis person is going to affect
your dick Really.
(02:47):
Dr Ruth died today.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
Oh my God, how old was she 96.
Oh, I thought she'd be olderthan that.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
Well, she always looked older because she was
only like 4'10".
She was a very small woman, youknow, to begin with, and so I
guess as she got older sheprobably turned out about 4.1.
I don't know, but she's been.
She always looked old.
I mean, 96 is just a good longtime, that's not a bad one, not
bad.
Yeah, she quit dispensing sexadvice a long long time ago, I
(03:16):
guess, because you know whatthat's right, yes, your answer
with Dr Ruth.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
Why is your penis not fucking?
That's right.
I don't know, doctor, you canfind out for me Because you're
not using it.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Oh, thank you, dr Ruth, you know what?
Speaker 3 (03:34):
That's true.
You don't use it, you lose it.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
so I'm told I think we need a partner.
I do oh, I love him yeah okay,well, on the weekdays, this is
my partner, and on the weekends,this is my partner, and on the
road weekends.
Right to left, right, hand,left hand.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
That's what the Trump dance is all about.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
If you're really flexible, like Costello, you use
one of your feet.
Oh yeah, there you go Now.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
I think we should mention that you are listening
to the originally cancelledradio guys, not originally
original cancelled radio guys,because I realized we start this
thing and it's like well, whothe hell are you?
I'm Costello, that's Chris, andwe need to just let you know
that the reason it's called theoriginal cancelledcel Radio Guys
is because we do things thatyou couldn't do on radio before
(04:28):
and we get in trouble.
We've already did that.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
We're still doing it again.
We are as we like to callourselves, and this is on our
merchandise T-shirts.
We are equal opportunityoffenders.
Offenders yes, no one is safe,and that's just the way it is.
Speaker 3 (04:47):
And it's usually us being remarkably stupid, but we
do like to make you laugh and itdoes happen.
We do also, of course, haveChris and Costello at Yahoocom.
You know, I checked that.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
Yeah, there's like 700 emails there Not to be
confused with Yoo-Hoo, which is,you know, I kind of like it you
don't drink Yoo-Hoo.
You never drank Yoo-Hoo.
Speaker 3 (05:08):
Oh, that was that chocolatey stuff.
No, no.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
Look, this is fantastic.
Yoo-hoo man.
Well you know you're not a sonof the South, like me, but we
grew up with Yoo-Hoo and MoonPie.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
I came from a place where we are a little more
sophisticated than that.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
Well, you live in the South now.
I mean you should be going tothe corner market and get you a
Yoo-hoo and a Moon Pie.
Send your front porch and watchthe world go by.
That's what you do With abottle of Yoo-hoo.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
Yeah, you're a southerner in the summer, you
don't?
Speaker 1 (05:37):
have to do anything else.
You sit there and get yourYoo-hoo, have your Moon Pie,
stuff your face and just watchyour neighborhood Moon pies.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
I like, I like moon pies.
Moon pies are great.
And then, what's your down withyour RC Cola?
Right.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Yes, and if you have to, you can replace them with a
Little Debbie, okay.
Speaker 3 (05:56):
Oh, little Debbie cakes.
Yeah Gosh, all these are reallytasty.
They're so bad for you.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Or, in your case, you would like a little Miley, but
it's okay, I hear by the way,that I shared a lot of Miley
Cyrus when she was in a Montanathing when she was 12.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
You know what we were talking about?
That song Back in Black right?
Yep, amy Winehouse did.
I found a copy of Miley Cyrusdoing it, and boy, it's good man
.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
It's just a good song .
So I like Miley, I'm sure withher type of voice.
Yeah, oh, it is Kind of close.
Amy's would be really good andit's interesting Kind of close
to Amy's.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
It would be really good.
I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, Iam, I am, I am, I am, I am, I
am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
I am, I am, you fall to the world, I die in a hundred
times, but then you go back toher and I go back to you.
He left no time to regret.
(07:35):
He kept his dick wet With hissame old, same bed.
Me and my head high and mytears dry.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Get home without my eyes Interesting.
You know that.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Something new from Costello today.
I have a question for you, sir.
Do you like George Clooney?
Speaker 3 (08:03):
George Clooney's a fine actor.
You think so?
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Yes, he's also got an incredible walk.
Yeah, she's pretty.
I like her.
She's smart.
Do you like him as a humanbeing, even though we don't
really?
Speaker 3 (08:16):
know him Well.
I mean, I think he appears tobe a very pleasant person, likes
to play prank.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
He's kind of a funny guy, good sense of humor.
I wonder why he I was justsurprised he threw Biden under
the bus, you know.
I mean, he's like a majorcontributor to him and to
Democrats in general.
He even told Obama in advancethat he did this.
(08:45):
His op-ed was coming out in theNew York Times and Obama knew
about it in advance.
He didn't try to talk him outof it or stop him.
He didn't tell Biden it wascoming, he just went.
I'm playing back on this one.
So it's just really bad becauseyou're trying to.
You got all this group tryingto defeat Trump, okay, and we
all don't want to see that prickback in for another four years.
(09:06):
I mean, who knows what the hellwill happen?
He wants to wipe out all kindsof stuff that we've had in this
country forever.
It's just scary.
Having all this division isjust not good.
As you go down to home stretch,I just, you know, I just don't
get it.
You know well, I've seen themedia pick so up to an incoming
president before.
It's like you're going to stayin.
You're going to run Every timehe speaks.
(09:26):
You're like waiting for him toscrew up, you know.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
But he's been doing that a lot hasn't he, Mr Perlman
?
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Well, they all do Start putting some video on
Trump again.
I mean good, he fucks up moreall the time.
God, let it go.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
Do you know what Trump's been doing?
He's been in Mar-a-Lago.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
What has he done?
Speaker 3 (09:46):
He's been in Mar-a-Lago talking to the, I
think.
Is it the Romanian presidentfor life?
Yeah, I mean.
But it's like he had, like youknow, the same kind of little
tea party with Putin and KimJong-un who else has he done?
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Well, there's the Project 2025, which is scary.
He wants to get rid of theDepartment of Education.
I'm going to cut back, and cutback Medicaid.
I'm going to cut back yourSocial Security.
I'm just going to cut it off.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
Yeah, I was going to say.
I read that I thought, wow,this is one hell of a piece of
propaganda for the Democrats.
But it turns out to be true.
We're going.
Oh my.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
God, this is scary.
People got to realize what thehell's going on here, you know.
So make everybody feel better.
Okay, so I mean Biden, as youknow, he's putting himself out
there.
He goes.
The more I'm out there, themore people see that I'm okay.
Maybe the better people feeland I'll give me that two or
three percentage points ahead ofTrump, which is all he needs to
win that everyone thinks, okay,biden will probably win the
(10:44):
popular vote, but he's going tolose the electoral vote?
Hope not.
He just got to win a couple ofthose key States that Trump's
counting on and this, you know,like he did last time when
Georgia, again he's got to winMichigan, ohio, pennsylvania.
At least get a couple of themknock out the electoral thing so
he wins.
So he's, he's out there.
He was in Michigan yesterday.
He's going to all these keybattleground states.
He's going look at me.
(11:06):
He always tells people, folks,I'm okay.
Since he's doing his big mediatour to show you how desperate
he is to let you know he's okay.
He's coming on this show rightnow.
If he's coming on here, youknow he's pushing big time and
putting himself out there.
It took an awful lot to get himhere?
Speaker 3 (11:26):
no, it didn't last year.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
This never happened this year.
No, not a problem.
Can he come on the show onetime?
You know, right now.
So here he is.
I don't want to hold him upanymore.
He may fall asleep here he isour president, Joe Biden.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Wait, I'm the president.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Yeah, you are.
You know, look, you're notstarting off really good.
And don't call your vicepresident Trump either.
Ok, I thought you said I wasthe president.
Look, you're not helpingyourself here.
What we want to do, simply, sir, is put everyone at ease and
give you a simple cognitive test.
Can we do that?
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Is that OK?
I don't know what that means,but let's go.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Just here we go.
We I don't know what that means, but let's go, here we go.
We're just going to say a wordand you spit out the first thing
that comes to mind when yougive your word okay, oh, this
should be good.
Yeah, you dribble.
Okay, so here's the first one.
All right, dog Bite Old.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
Me Cold Hot Bologna Correct.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
Hot, not Jill.
Okay, oh Loser.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
Hunter man, transgender.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
What?
How do you say woman?
What is transgender?
Okay, all right.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
Next word Trump, a big fat orange blob criminal,
lying golf-cheating bastard witha piece of anic insulation
stuck to his head.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Well shit, I think he's perfectly fine.
Based on that answer, he passedthe Cognitive Test.
You're great, mr President, youpassed, congratulations.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Do I get a trophy All ?
Speaker 1 (13:13):
right, get a freaking trophy, just go out and stump
and just win the damn electionso we don't have that idiot.
Okay, thank you, sir.
Take your pills, sir.
Take your pills, sir.
Take your pills.
Go do a rally, do something.
Okay, thanks for dropping by,we appreciate it, sir.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Thank you, go win this damn thing.
You're welcome God.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
I tell you Please go win.
I think he said hey.
Based on that last answer atthe beginning, I'm going to get
the right answer.
You mentioned Trump.
Yay, he came alive.
Speaker 3 (13:48):
Do you know what would do this, though?
Is this Article 25, right?
If everybody looked at that?
Now I just found it by accident.
It's like what is this shit?
Now I know what it is.
That's scary.
I mean, it really is.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
You're asking people to read.
Holy crap.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
People don't read, but they need to they.
They really, really should.
Speaker 1 (14:09):
I mean, of course they should.
If they did, they'd start to go.
Well, wait a minute and they go.
And of course he's denying he'sa part of that trump is, but
it's not true, because most ofhis former staff members and
stuff who created it he's.
He'll distance himself againstthat, distance himself against
anything, just to get myselfreelected Once he's in there.
Just think about it.
(14:30):
No matter what happens, whetheryou think Biden's too old, you
want somebody else.
You're going to call his partydivision, whatever, no matter
who they throw at Trump, you'vegot to vote for that person.
Just think about it.
Do you want on day one?
Do you want the dictator?
Speaker 3 (14:47):
That's the thing You're going to get a dictator.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
That's where you get the Hitler thing.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
I was just trying to find it online, here you said it
later We've got Hitler going onnow.
Everybody go look it up.
You will not believe it.
You'll just like going whatReally yes?
Speaker 1 (15:07):
ladies and gentlemen, this is when you hear Trump the
dictator yelling like that inGerman.
It makes you wonder what he'ssaying.
I mean, does anybody even knowwhat he's ranting about there?
Did he actually say for allthose people, I'm going to kill
millions of people, I'm going totake over all Europe.
Does he actually say that?
Speaker 3 (15:24):
Probably not, that's what.
Trump said that's his ideal.
I'm going to take over thewhole world, kill everybody
except for me.
Speaker 1 (15:32):
Here's the funny thing.
I hate to keep talking about it, but it's just so top of mind.
We can't keep talking about BenAffleck and Jennifer Lopez.
Who gives a shit?
Get together, get divorced,just get on with it.
Ok, so we don't care.
But did you say it's scarybecause everyone's going
democracies online?
That's the Democrats line.
Democrats are saying yeah,you're right, democracy is
(15:52):
online.
Joe Biden's running democracy.
I'm going what no, joe Bidendidn't.
In what way Democrats arerunning democracy?
In what way?
Speaker 3 (16:05):
You know, listen, his son took up.
Son stood up and took a bow theother day and he's like 6'7"
he's a baron.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
He's a tall kid.
He's going to be a basketballplayer.
Melania's going to thebackground.
She's going to spend all of hertime to help raise her son.
So hopefully he would be awayfrom all this stuff, not hear
all this stuff, not be a awayfrom all this stuff, not hear
all this stuff, not be a part ofall this stuff.
Doing the best she can.
It's kind of hard when that'syour freaking dad imagine having
that as a dad.
(16:34):
I mean well, not too much.
How many times have you seenfather and son together?
I think he went to hisgraduation, and that's about the
only time I've ever seen thoseguys together, I don't know
forever.
That's about the only time I'veever seen those guys together.
You know, I don't know forever.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
So that's that's true , you don't right?
I was thinking about that theother day.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
I wonder if he's still alive yeah, I can hear
millennia raising your son.
Remember your father's a pieceof shit.
We don't need him in our lives.
We're just here for the money,okay well, the money's nice
place to live here, marMar-a-Lago, we have our own
living quarters.
We don't have to see him.
No, you don't have to play golf.
You know he's a loser.
(17:11):
He sucks.
Hopefully he'll be dead soon.
Don't worry about it.
Okay, keep feeding them.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Mcdonald's should do it.
Remember when he had his firstinaugural dinner.
Remember that and it.
I remember when he had hisfirst inaugural dinner.
I remember that and it was oh,it was McDonald's.
It was McDonald's.
Yeah, I can't remember who thedinner was for a sports team it
might have been like a newsomebody.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
Can you imagine?
You're excited.
You worked hard, you achievedsomething, you get invited to go
to the White House to berecognized and there on the
table is a bunch of frigging BigMacs.
Oh God, oh, don't get mestarted.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
We've got to change stuff okay.
We really do.
This is, of course, theoriginal canceled radio.
Guys with Chris and Costello.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
Yep, that's what we mean Equal opportunity offenders
.
We're all over Trump.
We had fun with Biden earliertoday, so it don't matter, we're
all good.
Yeah, yeah, we just had toround it out.
We need to bring in Lizzo.
No, let's skip that.
Oh God, lizzo, wait a minute.
I got an update here.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
I was trying to remember her name last week.
Speaker 1 (18:22):
I update here the update.
I was trying to remember hername last week.
I can't update about.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
Lizzo here it is you ready, right?
Speaker 1 (18:27):
New news on Lizzo.
Come on, lizzo, give me Lizzo,she's still ready.
Here it is.
She's still fat.
Yay, she hasn't been doing herOzem, she's still canceled, I
guess, in a way, right, she'svery canceled, she cancels
herself anyway.
Yeah, that's true.
I'm trying to figure out whathappened here.
I've got one of those e-bikes,electric bikes.
(18:49):
I'm here in the Rocky Mountainsso it's very steep and stuff.
So having that power is kind ofgood.
I can go further than aneighbor go up and down these
big hills.
So I'm going to scoot down onmy e-bike earlier this week.
All right, I'm kind of far fromthe it freaking just dives on me
.
Okay, I'm going shit and it'slike it showed the thing before
(19:13):
that showed full power, but I'mstuck.
I'm gonna heal like this and itdives on me.
I'm going, and without thepower, because you can, you can
pedal along if you want to, butwhen the power totally off and
there's no assistant, thissucker weighs a ton.
It's, I got a big one.
It's really hard to pound, butI'm screwed, you know.
So I it, I turn it off, give ita second and it comes back.
It's going to be okay.
(19:34):
Hit the gas, I'm going shit.
I had to coast and push andcoast and push and climb.
It took me about a freakinghour to get home.
It's good exercise, yeah, greatexercise.
I was in traction, traction.
I was in bed for two days, okay.
(19:55):
So I'm trying to read here whatkind of troubles you, what I
have to write an email, becauseI got an email in the back of my
manual here.
It says you have physicalproblems, call this place.
So they said send this, sendthis and send this, send a
little video, show your problem,send a serial number and an
order number from like you knowwhen you bought it, so on and so
forth.
And so I sent all this stuff infor them.
That made me work for it, right, and they go.
(20:16):
Oh well, I see you didn't buythe bike from one of our
manufacturer stores.
You bought from a sub store.
So, and based on the year modelof your mic, a bike two years
old, just so you know.
Uh, you know, we don know.
We can't cover parts for it.
It's too old.
You don't carry parts on yourstuff from two years ago.
(20:36):
How do you service anything?
We'll have one of our technicalexperts drop me a note and see
if we can help walk you throughit, but we can't help you with
any parts.
If I've got a part problem,then I'm screwed, you know.
So it's like a Highland.
There's so many brands I don'tknow if it's a Highland, you
(20:57):
know.
Speaker 3 (20:57):
Highland.
Is it just maybe a softwareproblem?
Perhaps I don't know.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
So I'm going to have to go check all my connections,
check that panel again.
I'm afraid to go take a testdrive.
I'll be stuck down the freakinghill again because the only way
I get out of here I've got togo down steep hills.
If it dies on me I might haveto be pushing this freaking
thing all the way back.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
That's where you get your wife to follow you in the
car.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
But this is so big.
The biggest car we have is aLand Rover.
It won't even fit the landrover in the back.
It's just big.
It's like a, it's like a Harley.
I mean, it's just for an e-bike.
I'm in there pushing this thing.
All these other neighbors inthe e-bike, I'm just going you
prick.
You know I'm just waving.
(21:41):
Hey neighbor, I'm just going.
Fuck you.
Thanks for not helping.
Damn, it's kind of hot here inDenver.
Right Yesterday was 102.
Here in my athlete it doesn'tfeel.
It's okay, it's dry, I don'tcare, it doesn't feel bad.
They're having a big fit overback in Vegas where I'll be
(22:02):
going in a week because I gohalf and half.
They had 115 degree plus sevendays in a row and it's still
going.
I'm glad I've missed thatstraight.
I don't want to be in for that.
Speaker 3 (22:17):
Maybe you won't be able to make it next week.
There's no real reason for youto go there.
That's it really.
I work part time, but you workfrom home, so you don't have.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Sometimes I have to go see people in person.
Some people want to be seen inperson, yeah, even though we try
to do everything virtual.
Some people who are especiallythe local, because we have
people come from all over, fromdifferent areas and states, of
course, obviously they're allvirtual and sometimes it's
boring because they don't get tomeet me in person, because I
don't want to set things up forthem.
But the local people who livethere they want to come in.
(22:52):
You know they want to see theright person in person.
That person would be me.
So I have to go at least onceevery three, four weeks or so.
You know it's OK.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
So I'm trying to stretch this.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Wait for the heat wave to calm down.
I have to go down.
You have to wait until.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
September for that to happen.
Speaker 1 (23:11):
It's like 115 every day is a little bit more.
It's going to calm down nextweek.
It's going to get down to about100, 203.
That doesn't bother me, that115 plus it just beats you up.
They sent me back last week inVegas.
This week it's 120.
A hundred and friggin' twenty.
Speaker 3 (23:28):
Believe me, I know it , I know it, I know it.
When I worked there I was acameraman for a lot of the ESPN
fights and Showtime HBO.
We used to do them outside inseasons.
You got this nice bowl of heat.
Anyway We'd be out there andthere's just tarmac.
(23:49):
Oh God, it was miserable and itwould get way past 120 because
of the reason.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
I know With that video camera stuck to your ear
it'd melt to your ear.
I like that Underwear on yourear today.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
You know, stuck to your ear, you know, and they
were the big ones too, not thelittle baby ones.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Oh, hell yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:08):
I can remember I think I told you this story last
week where if you look at thosebig dial thermometers, right,
they have a little stick to stopthe dial from going further
around 120.
Well, most places it never evengets close, but there, of
course, the dial or the littlehand is hanging on this little
(24:28):
stick thing.
So someone said, well, what ifwe took the stick thing off?
That's how hard it is and itwas yeah to stop the dial going
past 120.
Yeah, okay, and it did.
It went up to like 130.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
Well, I was out there playing golf last year and I
thought well, you know, it'ssomething like 102.
Today I'm going to go out.
I'm going to go out.
I'm going to go out like 2 or 3in the afternoon when no one's
out there.
So I've got the whole course tomyself.
There's a reason for that, butsome holes are kind of low.
They have thermometers that letyou know what's going on, so
take care of yourself.
So I'm in one hole.
I said I'm not feeling so goodand I checked the mic.
It was 129 degrees.
(25:05):
You know, in that hole, icedtea and I'm like I couldn't.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
Oh, the heat, the heat.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
You're in the sticky south of South Carolina.
What have you got going ontoday?
Speaker 3 (25:23):
We've got part of the cloudy 95.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
No, yeah, but you've got humidity like 80% plus.
You know the humidity heretoday, just so you know, is 9%.
You're sneaky.
Speaker 3 (25:36):
It's at least 50%, if not more, expecting some
showers later on, which will benice.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
Let's go and piss everybody off.
I'm going to tell them somenews.
Tell them where you're going.
Take a little trip them whereyou're going.
Take a little trip Everybody.
Where are you going?
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Go on.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
Throw it out there Going to Hawaii.
Speaker 3 (25:59):
You suck, Sorry.
My daughter said they werehaving a conversation and she
said, oh, my friend's going toHawaii.
I said you know, I've neverbeen there.
She said, oh, we're going.
I said no.
She said you and me we'll go,We'll take Abby too.
I go okay, Okay, yeah, Wow.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
Shit Okay, which means they're buying you a
ticket.
She's buying me a ticket.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
Yeah, and where are you staying?
We'll find a hotel, a Motel 6,I suppose we'll find a hotel, a
Motel 6, I suppose Everybodyputs you up.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
So you're going to Hawaii.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
See, this shows that you raise your kids right a
certain way, that they aregiving back to dad they're going
to send you to Hawaii.
Speaker 3 (26:46):
I think Allison's idea is that if it goes really
nice, all the things that haveplagued me recently will all go
away.
I like that thinking.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
You know, when you go there you get the ocean breeze
and the beauty of the wholeplace.
Speaker 3 (26:58):
I may not come back.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
I can't have any stress going on at all, you know
.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
You're going to do your part of the show when
you're in Hawaii.
I want it outside, we want tosee what it looks like and stuff
.
So just plan on that, okay.
Okay, it is planned.
So we'll be looking at you.
We'll be looking at how sereneand content you are.
The rest of us back here willbe nothing but a wind-up ball of
freaking stress, okay.
Speaker 3 (27:22):
Yeah, going with my two daughters.
It should be fun because wetravel well together.
It should be fun?
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Of course it would be fun, you asshole.
You're going to Hawaii okay,never been.
You're going for free andyou're going.
Oh, it should be fun.
Speaker 3 (27:36):
You could go to Hawaii with some horrible people
, and that would ruin the wholething, wouldn't it?
What If you went with yourin-laws?
I don't know what your in-lawsare like they're dead.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
So yeah, that'd be fine.
We can take the urn.
Speaker 3 (27:53):
We'll take the urn with us.
Okay, Put them in one of thevolcanoes so they can get an
idea.
Speaker 1 (27:58):
So when are you taking this trip?
When are you going to Hawaii?
When?
Speaker 3 (28:02):
I don't have the actual.
It's between October andFebruary, as you said.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
Oh, I thought you were going sooner, later this
year.
Okay, oh, I thought you weregoing to say later this year, no
, no.
Later on there's a possibilityyou could be doing Christmas in
Hawaii.
Speaker 3 (28:16):
There's a possibility , unlikely.
It's very, very, very, very,although these things never
happen to me.
So I'm truly grateful to mydaughter.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
Well, this is the way it's supposed to be.
All right, you sacrificed a lottime, money, whatever, because
you wanted to raise kids.
Of course, it's your choice tohave kids.
You can be a shitty parent bybeing a good parent.
They went through a lotdivorced, their mother's, gone,
all those things.
(28:49):
Here you are, you've been therock.
You've divorced, their mother'sgone, all those things.
And here you are, you've beenthe rock you've been.
Now it's like you give back tothe parents in every way you can
.
I did the best of mine.
I didn't do that.
I didn't tell you why I wentcrap, but I tried to do
everything I could, the best Icould.
Speaker 3 (29:06):
She gave you that bike, didn't she?
My daughter.
Speaker 1 (29:07):
Yes, she gave you that bike, didn't she?
My daughter?
Yes, she did.
Yeah, yeah, she gave me thatpiece of shit bike and he
straightened me down the hill.
Speaker 3 (29:18):
You ungrateful kid Just kidding.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Love you.
No, it's not her fault.
Speaker 1 (29:21):
You know, I let them know what was going on with it
because they had to send me theorder number and stuff.
So I got to send it to them sothey could trace it back to what
they could do.
They're not happy about iteither.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
It's not your fault.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
It's just one of those things.
We'll get it fixed one way orthe other, so not to worry about
it.
Speaker 3 (29:38):
I'm still waiting for my vacuum cleaner to turn up
Vacuum cleaner.
I bought a Hoover floor cleanerslash vacuum cleaner, who cares
?
Speaker 1 (29:50):
You bought that.
You all care.
You tell your kids to buy itfor you.
What the hell are you buying itfor?
Speaker 3 (29:54):
I bought it and it's never turned up.
I'm still waiting for it toturn up.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
It came from.
Was that an Amazon thing?
Yeah, from Amazon.
My wife just bought somebirthday stuff for one of her
grandkids through Amazon.
It showed it was delivered, butthey never got it.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Exactly Same thing, same.
Speaker 1 (30:11):
thing.
Speaker 3 (30:12):
It happens.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
I mean they do 80 gazillion deliveries a day.
I mean none of it's going to beperfect, so I think you're
really good about making amends,though, so you'll be fine.
Speaker 3 (30:20):
Well, I hope so, because I'm almost up to my chin
with dog hair.
Well you've got to vacuum.
I can't vacuum.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
We did, we had to pull the dog hair out of the
bottom of the vacuum.
We had to do that this week too.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
Fun stuff I heard about your trip, though.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
The first thing I did , I emailed my daughter.
I went to Costello's.
Kids are taking me to Hawaii.
I said so, where are we going?
Speaker 3 (30:47):
And I got back we're not Not going Dad, Sorry, I said
how about Florida she goes no.
Oh, oh, downtown Denver.
Well, no, they'll take us how?
Speaker 1 (31:02):
about the creek in your backyard.
We could do that possibly.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
Oh well, never mind.
Well, you've been to all thenice places anyway.
Speaker 1 (31:13):
I have not, well, I have not been to Hawaii.
I've been to probably everyplace in the Caribbean, you know
Well.
You've been to Jamaica, puertoRico, dominican Jamaica, cayman,
you know, st Barts, costa Rica,all that stuff.
So that's all great.
So I've been to Europe.
I've been to your home.
I've been to Europe.
I've been to your home.
I've been to London a couple oftimes.
(31:34):
Love it, love it, love it.
That's one place I haven't been.
People tell me half and halfPeople love Hawaii, or some
people just go what's the bigdeal?
I'm just going.
I can't say anybody would thinkit's not a big deal.
I know it's expensive.
It's got to be beautiful, right?
Come on.
Well, let's hope so.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
I mean, if it hasn't burnt.
It was on fire this last week,I think that's Maui.
Speaker 1 (31:59):
Is it burning?
Speaker 3 (31:59):
again, Again, oh great yeah and I think that's
where we're planning to go toMaui.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
Well, there's the burnt part and there's the part
that wasn't touched.
It's still pristine and looksgreat.
The best place to go is Maui orWaikiki.
If you're going to one of those, I hear you're going to be in
great shape.
We have a lot of people inVegas who I work with and have
met, who are Hawaiians, and theytell me that's the place to go.
They have family back there.
The only reason they left andcame to Nevada is because they
(32:28):
didn't want to.
It's just so expensive to livethere, based on what they do for
a living and stuff.
Even though the money's okay,it's just not enough to have a
good life in Hawaii.
So they wanted to have a betterlife.
So they have a nicer house, abetter life, no money worries
living in Nevada, but, man, theysure miss Hawaii.
Speaker 3 (32:46):
Oh yeah, they call it the Fifth Island or something.
Speaker 1 (32:49):
Oh yeah, they call it the what, the Fifth Island or
something they do.
Yeah, that's what they call it.
And you, you prick, you'regoing for free so that's all
right.
Speaker 3 (32:57):
Well, I'm sorry, I mean, it hasn't happened yet.
Speaker 1 (32:59):
No, you're not sorry.
Speaker 3 (33:00):
Yeah, you're not sorry at all.
Speaker 1 (33:03):
It hasn't happened yet so I mean you know Well,
they wouldn't bring it upEverything they bring up they do
.
I mean, you know, they wouldn'tbring it up Everything they
bring up, they do.
Your kids are great, everythingthey say they're going to do,
they do you know.
Speaker 3 (33:15):
Yeah, well, again, we'll have to see.
I think priority on my end isto not be a certain boy, or at
least not here.
Anyway, I think we need to movefrom Columbia.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
Yeah, no shit.
We tried to have to move thereto begin with, so I don't know
what you're doing.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
Get the hell out of here see, yeah, like I said, I
must definitely be listening.
Actually, she's going to Spainbefore that.
Oh shit, jesus Christ.
Speaker 1 (33:42):
Stop it, Good God man .
Speaker 3 (33:46):
Well, I mean she works very hard.
I mean you know she does lotsof overtime.
She has a reason to do overtimenow and she's a 911 operator,
so it's a pretty high-stress job.
Speaker 1 (33:58):
That's another place I want to go.
Spain is just like high on thelist.
Everyone who's ever been hassaid that's one place you have
to go.
Have you been there?
Yes, I have.
As good as they say it is.
Speaker 3 (34:11):
It was a long time ago.
I was a kid, but I do remembervague bits.
I've seen it on TV.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
I've seen it on TV.
Speaker 3 (34:20):
You've been there, go check out the architecture.
That's what I would do.
Speaker 1 (34:24):
I'm just.
I'm due for a vacation.
Usually I go at least someplaceonce a year.
Twice a year I like to travel.
It's been like two years.
It's a big stretch for me, ohcome on Wait a minute.
Speaker 3 (34:38):
You had a vacation when you went to the convention
last year.
Admittedly, it was just downthe road from your house.
Speaker 1 (34:48):
That's here in Denver , you know also.
I know house, but that's that'shere in denver, you know also,
I know it's another bigconvention related to what I
used to do and own, and it'sthis year and it's also here in
denver.
So I'm going hey, I'll go that,just check it out for a day,
see some people and say hi, andjust that'll be that.
But I need to, I need a roadtrip pretty really bad.
(35:09):
We're thinking of two thingshere.
What we're considering is oneis going to Punta Cana in the.
Dominican Republic.
Speaker 2 (35:17):
Where is it?
Speaker 1 (35:19):
The Dominican Republic.
Punta Cana it's a beach townthere in the Dominican Republic.
It would be really nice.
A lot of people recommend it.
We have a friend who owns twocondos there.
He goes.
If you go, you can stay therefor free.
That's the big allure there.
It's kind of like you, youfreeload to Hawaii, I'm going to
freeload to the DominicanRepublic, or we're considering
possibly going back to Sarasota,florida, to go check it out
(35:42):
again because we have aninterest possibly of moving
there.
So I said I told my wife, Isaid we're going to go there.
It's still kind of hot, so youcan see what summer feels like.
So you need to see if you candeal with that it could happen
yeah, yeah, because you're bornand raised in Colorado so you
(36:03):
don't know what the humidity islike in summer down in Florida.
So you've got to go down therefor a few days and just
experience that, see if youthink you can deal with that
Shouldn't be too bad.
Speaker 3 (36:11):
I mean, you've got the coastal breezes and things.
It looks like a really niceplace.
Speaker 1 (36:16):
I checked it out.
It's a really she really likesit.
We have no issue with theplaces.
It's really pretty.
It's kind of tough here.
We live in the mountains.
We love the mountains.
When you're away from the beachfor long enough, you want to go
to the beach.
You miss the mountains.
People who live at the beachvacation the mountains.
As long as you can have accessto go back and forth to both.
(36:38):
What's the problem?
This is true.
The difference is, if we wereto live there, we'd be bypassing
all the snow.
I don't mind the snow, Iactually like the snow.
Snow and everything it has it'splace there is like we'd be
bypassing all the stuff.
Speaker 3 (36:51):
I don't mind the snow .
I actually like the snow, snowand everything.
It has its place Out of mydriveway.
Turn your driveway heater on.
That's hilarious.
Speaker 1 (37:05):
I was talking to one of the people I work with and
she's from Hawaii.
I just go okay, she goes everyday.
The part you're going to okayEvery day Never changed.
Every day.
The high is between 78 to 82,every freaking day.
Speaker 3 (37:20):
I suppose that could get a little old.
Speaker 1 (37:25):
No, it's not too hot, it's not too cold.
That's really a greattemperature to be at.
It is Perfect, you're going outthere.
It's not too hot, it's not toocold.
I mean, that's really a greattemperature to be at.
Yes, it is Perfect, you'regoing out there.
You're not sweating a day.
It's 78 to 82 every day.
Imagine living like that.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
Right, I'm packing my bags.
Well, you are, because you'regoing there.
That's awesome.
I'm already going there, I'mnot going to live there.
Speaker 1 (37:48):
You may go.
I'm leaving Columbia Somewhere.
Speaker 3 (37:52):
Somehow Yep when I'm ready to roll.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
There's a guy who's become a friend of mine.
He's not from Hawaii, but helived there before and wants to
go back.
But he's on oh the.
Speaker 2 (38:08):
Elvis guy.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
No, someone else.
He only has so much.
It's like fixed income.
He gets disability, but headded it all up.
But he found a place to livethere and it's like 600 square
feet, you know so.
But he gets to go back thereand live and it's like $900 a
month in Hawaii.
I'm just going.
Are you kidding me?
You know so.
So he's moving there and he'sgoing to live like that.
(38:33):
He's going to downstate sellinga lot of his stuff but
obviously there's no storage orwhatever.
But he goes who cares?
On the beach every day, 70 to82 degrees every day.
Speaker 3 (38:48):
So damn giving up everything else is important
just to live that lifestyle.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
You could do that in Cozumel too, perhaps Mexico.
Yeah, why not Mexico?
Why not?
Yeah, I know people that'saffordable.
Very affordable Going back topolitics.
If Trump wins, you have to lookat these other options.
He'd go move somewhere for fouryears and then come back if
there's anything left.
Speaker 3 (39:10):
If that happens, we'll see.
Speaker 1 (39:13):
It can't happen.
Don't let that People.
America we're talking toAmerica Don't let that happen.
You don't like Biden?
Understand, think he's too old,understand.
But look at the alternative.
That's just all there is youhave to look at.
Look at the alternative.
That's all there is you have tolook at.
Biden can't make it.
You've got President KamalaHarris.
What's wrong with her?
Do you have a problem with her?
(39:33):
She's fine, she's smart.
She was a freaking prosecutor.
She's educated, she's schooled,she's pleasant, she's nice,
she's not 95.
She's less than 100 years old.
Bingo, just to make you feelreally sad, today I'm doing slow
(39:54):
cooking, a pork roast.
I'm doing pulled pork barbecue.
Today I'll be right around, man, you should come by.
Last night I cooked a whole redsnapper.
I like to cook, you know.
I got the whole snapper.
I love cooking the whole fish.
That's great.
A whole red snapper.
You cut into it and he's likewhat did you do to the whole
fish Head, tail, everything.
(40:16):
It's really good.
Speaker 3 (40:17):
If you're supposed to boil the head, it's supposed to
be very good.
Speaker 1 (40:21):
I can grill them.
No, no.
Speaker 3 (40:25):
Boil it later for soup.
Speaker 1 (40:27):
I grill them.
No, no, I mean boil it laterfor soup.
Well, it's a good stock, yeah,fish stock, you know.
So it'll be like you know, fish, that I can fry it.
I'm just going.
I don't like fried food, so Ijust really coat it well, made
it really citrusy with a lot oflime juice and some seasoning,
put them on the grill.
Man, he was good.
So flaky and moist.
I'm getting hungry and todaywe're doing barbecue.
Speaker 3 (40:47):
You're making me damn hungry now I'm making my
homemade coleslaw.
Speaker 1 (40:51):
My homemade coleslaw I already made this.
Speaker 3 (40:57):
You made that when we were down in Florida.
I remember that.
Speaker 1 (41:02):
I made the crawfish, then Maybe that crawfish boil
outside.
How good was that?
Huh, I made that crawfish then,man.
Speaker 2 (41:09):
Maybe that crawfish boil outside.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
How good was that?
Huh, I made that crawfish boiland you guys never had it before
and there was nothing left.
The whole damn thing.
You ate all the sauces, theshrimp, the crawfish, the corn,
the onions.
You ate everything.
Speaker 3 (41:24):
That was us fighting over the last one.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
Yeah, I got homemade coleslaw barbecue and also I
made my salad, my strawberry redonion radish, my dressing salad
it was great.
Speaker 3 (41:36):
I remember you went over that trouble and somebody
said I don't like this.
Was it dope, perhaps I don'tremember somebody's, that's why
we don't speak to the prickanymore, okay, he yeah, he sent
me something was really rudemonths and months ago.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
He was really drunk, it was very obvious and then
like, uh, we could wait a joke,mr religion, mr mr badness,
southern badness, billy grahamjr was yeah, yeah exactly, and
then he, then he sends me hey,how are?
Speaker 3 (42:05):
you doing?
Oh yeah, it's like you don'tremember the last thing you sent
me, so I just sent that back tohim.
What was the last thing thatyou sent?
Here's why I'm not talking toyou right now.
Speaker 1 (42:17):
Oh, because he thought we were rude and we're
ugly and we're nasty and we'rejust dumb people.
And I think he just didn't likethe fact that we make fun of
him because we give out the DokeAwards.
Speaker 3 (42:28):
Well, you know, I mean, we don't do things like
that anymore.
We should do some more stufflike that.
Speaker 1 (42:34):
Well, if we could make a symbol of a Doke Award,
we'd make just something of aplatelet of his teeth.
Okay, and just give that out.
Speaker 3 (42:46):
You know how to hit a man where it hurts.
Speaker 1 (42:49):
Well, look at this one.
We first met and worked withhim some 30 years ago.
He was a young guy in his lower20s.
He thought, well, he'll takecare of that.
So he reaches out like 30 yearslater and we go, we think he'd
be different, right?
Well, it looks like he's givingbirth in his third trimester
and his teeth are the same asawful as always.
(43:10):
And 30 years of that built up.
Obviously you got gum diseaseand the breath could just like
melt.
This whole microphone.
Speaker 3 (43:20):
Unfortunately, it's all true too.
Speaker 1 (43:22):
Yeah, you were just being honest.
Go to the freaking dentist.
Okay, I mean, has he everhonest?
Go to the freaking dentist?
Has he ever been in his life?
Speaker 3 (43:29):
Probably not.
Speaker 1 (43:31):
There's probably only one dentist in West Virginia
and he's probably not that busybecause he's going.
Oh, once he comes, the word ofthe day for Doak and he's never
done.
This is floss.
Speaker 3 (43:46):
And brush and sw, floss and brush and swill and
everything, everything.
Speaker 1 (43:52):
Anything oral, just do it.
Speaker 3 (43:53):
Mouthwash, mouthwash.
Speaker 1 (43:57):
You know how can you get your life.
Speaker 3 (43:59):
We can't all be perfect, but there you go.
Speaker 2 (44:01):
I wonder what he means.
Speaker 1 (44:03):
He likes to write songs that no one records or
thinks are any good or gives ashit about.
He should write a song abouthis teeth.
Speaker 3 (44:11):
That'd be great.
I woke up one morning to findmy baby gone.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
I breathed on her and she we call Bucky yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:24):
Oh yeah, bucky's, I found my baby gone.
I turned around and breathed onher.
Speaker 1 (44:31):
He called Bucky.
Oh yeah, bucky's.
Yeah yeah, I found my baby gone.
I turned around and breathed onher.
Did you ever hear a song thatDope wrote?
Did they ever show you somelyrics, or maybe try to sing you
one?
You ever heard anything that hewrote?
Never did?
Does he write Christian music?
Is that what he writes?
He writes Christian music.
Does he Christian country?
Well, country is Christianmusic.
Is that what he writes?
He writes Christian music.
Does he Christian country?
Well, country, is Christianmusic Christian country?
Right?
Yeah, not that my dog died.
(44:52):
I'm drunk.
I lost my truck.
I screwed my neighbor's wife.
Speaker 3 (44:57):
He probably did that and I broke a tooth.
Yeah, that would be him.
Speaker 1 (45:00):
He wouldn't write that.
He's Mr Goody Goody, MrSouthern Baptist Christian boy.
Yeah, he is.
I'm Doe from West Virginia.
Speaker 3 (45:09):
I'm a God-fearing hillbilly boy, I'm also a
trumpet.
Oh God, I forgot he is, isn'the?
Oh, big time, big time.
That's why we got into a fight,and that was years before we
really realized what we had onour hands, holy shit.
What he got really angry aboutwas I put on Facebook or
(45:30):
something I said you know, heyman, the emperor has no clothes.
Remember that.
Yeah, the emperor has noclothes, and he didn't like that
.
He didn't get it either.
He didn't.
What are you talking about?
He don't have no clothes.
He's probably got more clothesthan you ever had.
What are you talking about?
He don't have no clothes.
He's probably the more clothesthan you ever had and probably
the best clothes, because heonly has the best clothes and
they probably tell you that hehas the best clothes.
(45:50):
You know, he's got clothes he'sgot, he's got wardrobes full of
clothes.
Speaker 1 (45:54):
Another other freaking, you're missing the
point when you're talking to anuneducated west virginia country
boy, I mean, what do you youexpect?
Well, I would have thoughtthat's the thing you've got.
You know, doakie's athird-grade graduate.
Speaker 3 (46:14):
Going to go for a dip in the cement pond.
Speaker 1 (46:16):
He went to first.
He went to Jethro Elementary inWest Virginia.
Speaker 3 (46:21):
Yeah, but where were those guys from there?
Epson Buddy Epson, I think.
He was from West Park Gold, theJethro Clampett family.
One of those guys from there,epson Buddy Epson, I think he
was from West.
Speaker 1 (46:30):
Park Gold the.
Speaker 3 (46:30):
Clamping family.
This is taking a reallyinteresting turn.
No, it's been fun, it's been afun turn.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
It's been great.
Speaker 3 (46:41):
I love picking on the .
We can pick on Doak.
No, it's just that we should.
There just hasn't been anybodyother than Biden to pick on
right now.
Speaker 1 (46:51):
Well, I think that's why the media is so much over,
because they're sick of playingTrump speeches where he spews
out stupid shit every day.
So it's like, oh, this isgetting kind of old, so I got
something new to go on now.
So, like I said, you can't.
There's the Clooney thing.
That kind of made some peoplekind of surprised by it.
Alec Baldwin his case wasdropped yesterday.
(47:12):
Yeah, that was brilliant If wecan't follow the trial anymore.
I'm happy for him because itwas like a trumped-up stupid
shit anyway.
So it's really sad the womandied, but I don't think it was
any intent on his part.
Speaker 3 (47:23):
Oh any intent in this part?
Oh, none, none.
Speaker 1 (47:25):
It's not his job to make sure there's real bullets
in the gun or not.
He's the actor, okay.
Speaker 3 (47:30):
I thought, you know, when his defense was making that
first speech, the younger guyof the two, he was brilliant.
I'm going, you know, after that, are you even going to continue
with this?
You know, if I was a judge I'djust go.
That's it.
Speaker 1 (47:43):
Throw the case out.
See what money and good lawyerscan do for you.
You know.
Speaker 3 (47:48):
Like when I have my lawyers.
Speaker 1 (47:49):
They're going to score a plea.
I'm just going.
Well, wait a minute.
This is fight.
Now just take a fucking plea.
Speaker 3 (47:53):
Yeah, we don't want to go, we don't.
Oh, these suck.
I had an attorney who I hadthis case, if you remember, with
the heating system here thatkilled me with the gas thing,
and everything.
Speaker 1 (48:10):
You're sucking in poisonous fumes at night when
you're sleeping.
Speaker 3 (48:12):
And he dropped the case.
He said, well, I just don'tthink I'm up to this, I go.
What I could do, this, I coulddo this, they're not paying him
enough.
Speaker 1 (48:24):
They're looking at it .
He's only paying me me so much.
It ain't enough for me to dothis.
I asked my guy once I go, weneed to do it.
He goes.
You know it's going to cost youthis, this and this.
If we go do that, there's arisk that this, this and this
could happen.
What do you want to do?
Everything he laid out was likedon't freaking do it.
Speaker 3 (48:41):
Same shit you went through Same thing, yeah, yeah.
Well, after this week They'llbe sick.
Speaker 1 (48:50):
Oh, you know, you know what.
Speaker 3 (48:53):
You're breaking up there For some reason.
Speaker 1 (48:55):
Alec Baldwin's a free guy, dr Ruth is dead.
I mean, I mean.
Speaker 3 (49:00):
You know what's the point In continuing man.
Speaker 1 (49:03):
Ellen DeGeneres Is trying to do Her final stand up
tour.
She's going, she goes.
She canceled a lot of days.
She's got a few more left.
She goes.
When I'm done, I'm going to berecording a Netflix special.
When that comes out, I'm donewith show business forever.
You'll never see me again.
Really, I'm good with that.
I'm okay.
I'm okay.
I mean for a while there, hershow was the shit.
(49:24):
When it came to Dave Tynan, theEllen show was big shit.
Speaker 3 (49:26):
Remember when she was before she came out.
Everyone's going oh, come on,she's gay.
Speaker 1 (49:31):
Oh yeah.
And then when she came out thatwas a big deal on the show.
That was good.
I give her credit for that.
Her show was a shitful lot, butyou could tellictive, you know,
and you know, I don't know.
So it's just, and I guess shehad that toxic atmosphere at
work.
So I just let her go.
She wants to go, she goes.
(49:53):
I've been canceled twice.
Well, you know one thing youcanceled because you came out.
That wasn't your fault.
But you came back strong.
Your daytime show was great.
This time you're canceledbecause it was your fault.
This time you're canceledbecause it was your fault.
Speaker 3 (50:05):
You did do something wrong.
Yeah, yeah, I was thinking ofthe sitcom show she was doing
originally.
Speaker 1 (50:11):
Well, that's when she said she was canceled the first
time because she came out ofthe gig.
And then the show was canceledlike a year later and she says
because of I don't know, it justran its course, but she came
back for the daytime show.
Good for you.
You did a great run 19 years,but you're canceled now because
of you.
Now she's doing this Netflixspecial where they're paying her
millions.
(50:32):
She goes, I guess.
So you get so much freakingmoney in the bank, you don't?
Speaker 3 (50:37):
Yeah, you don't Talking of that, talking of so
much money when I found out Ilooked at my account that I used
to have to pay my car off right.
Yep, and I'm looking.
This is like plus 500 bucks.
I got 500 bucks out of the dealdid ellen, send that to you.
(50:58):
I guess I'll send it to me, butit's like I'm in the state when
they're going 500.
Do I owe them?
No, no, isn't that nice 500bucks out of nowhere.
Speaker 1 (51:07):
They gave you 500 bucks for whatever you overpaid.
Speaker 3 (51:11):
Yes, I guess I overpaid at some point.
Speaker 1 (51:13):
No, okay, did Doak send you some money as an
apology?
Speaker 3 (51:20):
Did Doak send me anything?
You know, I think maybe I willmove to Myrtle Beach after all.
Speaker 1 (51:25):
You know what Doak sent you he to Myrtle Beach
after all.
You know what Doug sent you hesent you an autographed copy of
his book.
He did.
Speaker 3 (51:35):
One of tens, not thousands but tens.
Speaker 1 (51:38):
Of course you opened it right away and started
reading it right away.
Right, you know I did In fact Iread it, you did.
Speaker 3 (51:46):
I think I still have it here somewhere.
Speaker 1 (51:47):
You went to the chapter about radio to see if
you were in it.
Speaker 3 (51:51):
I never did.
Do you remember what chapterthat was?
Speaker 1 (51:55):
I never seen the damn book.
I don't know.
You didn't send it to me.
Speaker 3 (51:57):
Guy hates my gut, oh I was going to send it to you,
hang on.
Speaker 1 (52:07):
I'll talk about his dental hygiene and him being a
stupid redneck kid, but hedidn't think too much of me.
Oh, he does too.
Imagine that.
Hopefully, everybody can lookat the professional backdrop of
Costello's house, the gray sheethanging up behind him okay,
that is, it's covering up hisunmade bed Shit.
Speaker 3 (52:24):
That is actual photograph.
Speaker 1 (52:27):
Is that a yellow stain on that?
Speaker 3 (52:28):
sheet oh stop.
Speaker 1 (52:30):
There it is.
A crazy journey A crazy journey.
You got a picture back.
You don't see the picture.
Is he smiling?
I don't see them.
Teepas, there he is.
Look at him.
Snaggletoothies, uppers andlowers are all fucked up.
Speaker 3 (52:50):
Now, the thing of it is, though, everything.
Speaker 1 (52:53):
The thing of the Opie barber who got his hair like
that, Jesus.
Speaker 3 (52:57):
He honestly hasn't changed in 35 years.
No, not a bit.
The thing about this is thislovely book that he wrote.
He was a salesman at Super 102WVSR in Charleston and so, of
course, being a salesman, hewrote this book about some of
(53:17):
the things that had happened.
Right, and we're in, chris andI are in here.
We've never actually found it.
Speaker 1 (53:23):
yet I don't have the book to even look at it.
So if you find it, you have totell me what it is.
Speaker 3 (53:29):
I'll have to.
Obviously now is not the timeto do this.
Speaker 1 (53:32):
I wrote something.
I work with these two assholeswho are on air personalities
there and they're going to hellbecause of the way they're.
Speaker 3 (53:38):
But the funny thing is Joe Walsh, E-Z-E-N-N-W-A.
Keith Sweet and Billy OceanC-E-N-N-W-A.
Keith Sweet and Billy Ocean,Ready for the world.
Speaker 1 (53:48):
Where's the chapter that he wrote about that he's
never been with a woman?
Speaker 3 (53:54):
I don't know what do you call that blow up of a
girlfriend of his what's wrong?
Speaker 1 (54:00):
Yeah, he did.
Speaker 3 (54:01):
Was he paying her or something?
Speaker 1 (54:03):
He was paying her.
Speaker 3 (54:04):
Oh no, he's paying her Something.
Oh, here we go.
Thanks to my lifetime offriends growing up from St
Albans, we don't mention exactlythe sighting, isn't it?
Speaker 1 (54:22):
On that note we're going to end today's show.
The squealer once again goesback to dope.
Okay, Indeed, here we go.
It just sounds like a familyreunion when you play the
squealer.
The dope family Happy to seeeach other.
Speaker 2 (54:41):
Wee, wee.
Speaker 1 (54:57):
Wee Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant stuff.
The Doak family reunion.
Speaker 3 (55:05):
There you go, yep, the Doak family reunion.
Exactly what that was.
How did you guess you gettoday's grand prize?
Speaker 2 (55:14):
Whatever that may be.
Speaker 3 (55:17):
Well, the only thing I've got here is a bit of honey,
so maybe you can have.
This is your prize.
Empty wrapper there you go.
Speaker 1 (55:26):
That's the next cancellation prize.
Thanks guys, We'll talk to younext week.
Speaker 3 (55:31):
Empty, sweet Wrapper of Life.
Okay, mate, goodbye, bye.
Speaker 1 (55:34):
Leave studio, there you go.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!