Build a Partnership With Your Care Community: Six Essential Tips / Alzheimer’s and Other Dementias

Is your loved one in a memory care community, or are you considering moving them into one? Understanding how to build a collaborative relationship with the care team is crucial for ensuring the best outcomes for your loved one.

We are Sue Ryan and Nancy Treaster. As caregivers for our loved ones with Alzheimer's and other types of dementia, we've learned that creating a true partnership with care community staff can dramatically improve quality of care and reduce stress for everyone involved.

We recently spoke with James Lee, CEO and co-founder of Bella Groves, an award-winning memory care community. With over 17 years of experience in senior living and memory care, James has developed valuable insights on how to transform what is often an adversarial relationship between family caregivers and professional caregivers into a collaborative partnership.

Full Show Notes

https://thecaregiversjourney.org/35-build-a-partnership-with-your-care-community-six-essential-tips-alzheimers-and-other-dementias/

Additional Resources Mentioned

• Support the nonprofit The Caregiver's Journey: https://give.cornerstone.cc/thecaregiversjourney

Takeaways

Tip 1: Assess the Overall Fit

When looking for a memory care community, many families focus on practical aspects like location, price, and amenities. While these factors are important, James suggests that philosophical alignment and rapport with the management team are even more crucial for long-term success.

When evaluating potential communities, James recommends shifting your mindset from "us versus them" to "us collectively versus dementia." This perspective can transform the relationship from the beginning.

Tip 2: Embrace the Community Aspect

Moving your loved one from home to a community setting represents a fundamental shift in their care environment—from one-on-one care to being part of a group.

Tip 3: Acknowledge Your Role Has Changed

When your loved one moves into a care community, your role shifts from being the primary caregiver to being a care partner working alongside professional caregivers.

Tip 4: Recognize That the Diagnosis Will Progress

A critical aspect of the care partnership is understanding that your loved one's condition will continue to change over time. In fact, by the time someone moves into a memory care community, they're often in the steeper part of their dementia journey where changes happen more rapidly.

Tip 5: Acknowledge Your Grief

The dementia journey involves ongoing loss, a phenomenon Sue calls "drip grief." As your loved one's condition progresses, you experience new losses almost daily—abilities that disappear, memories that fade, personality changes that emerge.

Tip 6: Engage with the Community Caregiving Team

The families whose loved ones have the best quality of life tend to be those who actively engage with the care team. This engagement goes beyond basic communication to building genuine relationships with the people caring for your loved one.

Building a True Partnership

Creating a collaborative relationship with your loved one's care community team isn't just about being nice—it's about achieving the best possible outcomes for your loved one with dementia.

By reframing the relationship from "us versus them" to "us collectively versus dementia," you can transform what is often an adversarial dynamic into a true partnership. As James explains, "You are your loved one's expert, we are dementia experts. And the two together give us the best chance to get this right."

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