Ep 144: Why Evenings Feel Harder in Fall & Winter — and How to Stay Alcohol-Free - The Catholic Sobriety Podcast

Episode Transcript
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SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
Welcome to the Catholic Sobriety Podcast, the
go-to resource for women seekingto have a deeper understanding
of the role alcohol plays intheir lives.
Women who are looking to drinkless or not at all for any
reason.
I am your host, Christy Walker.
I'm a wife, mom, and ajoy-filled Catholic.

(00:21):
And I am the Catholic sobrietycoach.
And I am so glad you're here.
You know what's coming that timeof year when it's dark by
dinner, your energy dips beforeyou even start cooking, and
everything in you says, I justneed something to take the edge

(00:43):
off.
Yep.
The clocks are changing againfor most of us.
The light fades, the daysshorten, and that 5 p.m.
hour suddenly feels a little bitheavier.
If you've ever stood in yourkitchen thinking, I just want a
glass of wine to make this feeleasier, or I deserve something

(01:05):
after the day I've had, you arenot alone.
There's something about thatearly darkness that pokes at all
of our weak spots.
You've been on all day, makingdecisions, meeting needs,
holding everything together, andyour brain is like, okay, we've

(01:28):
earned our reward now, right?
And then boom, the craving showsup.

But here's the truth (01:34):
just because the world gets darker
earlier doesn't mean your spiritor your rhythm have to.
So in today's episode, we aretalking about how to prepare for
the time change before itcatches you off guard,
especially if evenings have beenyour danger zone for

(01:56):
overdrinking, emotional eating,or numbing out.
Plus, the winters are just darkfor everyone, even if you don't
experience a time change.
So we're going to unpack what'shappening in your brain and body
during this seasonal shift.
And I'll share five faith-basedpractical ways to keep your

(02:19):
evenings calm, connected, andalcohol-free, even when the sun
disappears before six or five,or four.
Think of this episode as yourcozy, realistic guide to finding
peace in the darker months,grounded in faith, supported by
science, and full of grace forwherever you are right now.

(02:43):
So grab a mug of something warm,light a candle if you want to
set the mood, and let's talkabout how to keep your peace and
your sense of humor, even whenthe light fades early.
All right, let's start with thewhy.
Because it's not just that youhate winter or you've lost your

(03:03):
willpower.
When daylight fades, your body'schemistry actually shifts.
Your brain starts releasingmelatonin, the time for bed
hormone, long before you'reready to crawl under the covers.
At the same time, your serotoninlevels drop because sunlight
helps regulate it.

(03:24):
Less serotonin equals lowermood, more fatigue, and yes,
more cravings.
So by the time you hit that 5p.m.
hour, your brain is doing theemotional equivalent of waving a
white flag and saying, I'mtired, I'd like a cookie, a nap,
or a drink.
Maybe all three.

(03:45):
It's not a moral failure.
It's biology.
Your reward system, that limbicpart of your brain that's always
looking for comfort, is firingup and searching for a shortcut.
The problem is alcohol seemslike a shortcut to calm, but
it's really a detour.

(04:06):
You get that quick dopamine hit,a short burst of relief, but
then crash.
Your serotonin dips, your sleepgets disrupted, and you wake up
more tired and irritable thanbefore.
That's why it's so easy to getstuck in a loop.
The darkness leads to stress,the stress leads to drinking,

(04:29):
the drinking leads to regret,and the regret leads to
repeating.
But here's the hope.
You can't break that loop.
You just need to know what'shappening and set yourself up
before your brain goes onautopilot.
So let's talk about fivefaith-filled brain-savvy ways to

(04:52):
build better evenings.
The first thing is to start yourday with light and a little
purpose.
If darkness seals your energy atnight, you've got to front load
your morning with light.
Even 10 minutes of natural lightwithin an hour of waking helps
your brain regulate dopamine andserotonin, your built-in mood

(05:17):
stabilizers.
Dr.
Andrew Huberman, who happens tobe my favorite neuroscience
professor to quote, says thatmorning light sets your
circadian rhythm, helps you stayalert during the day, and sleep
better at night.
So step outside with yourcoffee, even if it's cold, and

(05:38):
let that light hit your eyes andsay, okay, Lord, new day, new
mercies.
So what if you're like me andyou live somewhere where the
winter is cloudy and rainy mostof the time?
Well, even on cloudy days,outdoor light is 10 to 50 times

(06:01):
brighter than most indoorlighting.
Your eyes don't need the directsun to send that morning light
signal to your brain.
What they need is ambientoutdoor light because the light
intensity measured in lux isstill high enough to reset your
circadian rhythm and boostserotonin production.

(06:23):
For example, indoor lighting isabout a 300 to 500 lux, where
cloudy outdoor light is actually5,000 to 10,000 lux.
Bright sunlight, of course, isgoing to be best, and that's
50,000 to 100,000 lux.
But even if it's raining orcompletely overcast, just

(06:46):
stepping outside for 5 to 10minutes in the morning helps
your brain register, oh, we'reawake now.
You don't have to stare at thesky or get sunburned.
Just get outdoors where thelight is brighter than it is
inside.
The second way to build betterevenings is to redefine what
unwind means.

(07:07):
Let's be honest, unwind is oftencode for I need to escape, I
need to know.
And look, we've all been there.
You're tired, you'reoverstimulated, and your brain
says, let's just turn things upfor a while.
But escaping doesn't restorepeace, it just delays the
discomfort.
So instead of escaping, tryexhaling.

(07:32):
Create a wind-down ritual thatactually comforts you, body and
soul.
Here's what that might looklike.
Pour sparkling water with limeor a mocktail in your prettiest
glass.
Seriously, the glassware wasnever the problem.
Light a candle that smells likecalm instead of chaos.

(07:56):
Play music that reminds yournervous system We are home now,
we are safe, and now we aremoving into the wind down part
of our evening.
You're not giving up yourritual, you're redeeming it,
you're making it better.
And as you take that first sipof whatever's in your glass, try

(08:20):
whispering to yourself I didenough today, I don't have to
earn rest, and will feel so goodin the morning if I choose not
to have alcohol this evening.
That one sentence can truly calmyour nervous system.
Just give it a try.

(08:42):
Now the third way is to move alittle, even when you don't feel
like it.
So here's something funny.
Your body can't tell thedifference between I'm tired and
I'm sedentary.
When it's dark and cold, it's sotempting to go straight into
pajama mode.
I'm guilty of this.

(09:02):
I love to cozy up in my joggersand a big sweatshirt.
But gentle movement is going tochange everything.
It tells your body we're notshutting down, we're shifting
gears.
You don't need a fancy workoutor to burn off your dinner.

(09:24):
All you need to do is moveenough to release tension and
boost your dopamine naturally.
So that can be a lot ofdifferent things, but what that
might mean for you is a10-minute walk after dinner.
It's a bonus if you pray as yougo or maybe you call a friend.

(09:44):
You can stretch in the kitchenwhile your pasta is boiling.
You can dance to worship musicwhile folding laundry.
And yes, I've personally donethe dance to Forrest Frank song,
Your Way is Better.
If you haven't seen it, look itup because every time you hear
the song, you will want to dothose little dance moves too.

(10:06):
It's a great way to releasetension and just kind of reset
those neurotransmitters.
And it's so fun too.
If you can laugh, you can move.
And if you can move, you cantotally shift your mood.
Now, the fourth thing is toanchor your evenings in
something sacred, something thatyou are going to look forward

(10:28):
to, something that fills yourcup.
Now, this one's my favorite.
Evenings don't feel emptybecause you're missing wine.
They feel empty because you'remissing meaning.
After a long day, your heartdoesn't need more noise or
numbing.
What it actually needs isconnection.

(10:50):
So make space for somethingsacred.
Light a candle and read a shortscripture verse.
Write down three things you'regrateful for.
You can pray a decade of therosary or a full rosary.
You can send a quick check-in toyour accountability partner or
text a praying emoji in yourgroup chat.

(11:12):
But the goal is not perfection,it's presence.
When you fill that 5 to 7 p.m.
window with truth and purpose,your craving loses its grip.
And bonus, your brain startsassociating that time with
peace, not pressure.
You're literally renewing yourbrain.

(11:32):
It's Romans 12, 2 in action.
And then the fifth thing, thelast thing, is to embrace the
slower season intentionally, notbegrudgingly.
This season is not aboutpunishment.
It's permission.
You don't have to fill everyquiet evening or fight the early

(11:54):
dark.
You can let it slow you down.
The world rushes and Godrestores.
You might find that this is theseason to go to bed earlier.
Simplify your meals.
Yeah, take out that crock pot.
That's one of my favoritethings.
Read instead of scroll.

(12:14):
Journal by candlelight.
Breathe between sentences.
Maybe God's inviting you intostillness and not productivity.
Psalm 27:1 says, The Lord is mylight and my salvation.
Whom shall I fear?

(12:35):
So when the darkness creeps in,don't fight it.
Light your candle, wrap yourselfin a blanket, and let the quiet
become your teacher.
You're allowed to slow down.
That's not weakness, it'swisdom.
Here's a confession.
I don't really feel the pool ofalcohol anymore.

(12:56):
It's been decades and thatdesire is long gone.
But I do still crave comfortsometimes, usually around that 5
p.m.
window.
It might look like snacking whenI'm not hungry or mindlessly
scrolling just for a minute.
Why?
Because my brain's looking for alittle dopamine, that feel-good

(13:17):
chemical that dips when the daywinds down.
After hours of being productiveand focused and on, it's natural
to want a reward or atransition.
But the truth is what I actuallyneed in those moments, it's not
sugar or scrolling.
What I need is relief.
It's a pause, a breath,something that tells my nervous

(13:41):
system, you're done for the day,you can rest.
So now when that urge hits, Itake it as a signal, not a
problem.
It's just my body asking forcare and my mind is asking for
calm.
And instead of fighting it, Ianswer it differently.
A walk, a prayer, music, astretch, or a cup of tea.

(14:05):
That's how peace is built.
One small intentional responseat a time.
So when the sun sets early thisseason, don't panic.
Prepare.
You can absolutely create yourown rhythm, protect your peace,
and meet your need for comfortin ways that truly fill you, not

(14:26):
drain you.
Because the goal isn't to nevercrave comfort.
We're humans, it's going tohappen, but it is to learn how
to comfort yourself with thingsthat create life instead of
taking it away.
If this episode gave yousomething to think about or just
reminded you that you're not theonly one trying to make 5 p.m.

(14:50):
feel a little less chaotic, I'dlove to have you join us inside
the Sacred Sobriety Lab.
It's where faith, brain science,and real community come together
to help you create a life thatfeels calm, purposeful, and
peaceful, with or without theglass.

(15:10):
You'll find women walking thesame road, asking the same
question, and building the samekind of steady evenings that
you're craving.
Come and join us atSacredSobriety Lab.com and if
you have a friend who could usea little more peace this season,
share this episode with her.

(15:31):
Let's be the women who keep ourlight on even when the sun sets
early.
Well, that does it for thisepisode of the Catholic Sobriety
Podcast.
I hope you enjoyed this episode,and I would invite you to share
it with a friend who might alsoget value from it as well.
And make sure you subscribe soyou don't miss a thing.

(15:54):
I am the Catholic SobrietyCoach, and if you would like to
learn how to work with me orlearn more about the coaching
that I offer, visit my website,the Catholic Sobriety Coach dot
com.
Follow me on Instagram atCatholic Sobriety.

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Ep 144: Why Evenings Feel Harder in Fall & Winter — and How to Stay Alcohol-Free

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Ep 144: Why Evenings Feel Harder in Fall & Winter — and How to Stay Alcohol-Free