March 28, 2025 • 21 mins
Ever caught yourself automatically reaching for that glass of wine after a stressful day? You're not alone. The desire to escape, unwind, and find relief is completely natural – but alcohol might not be the solution your body and soul truly need.
This episode dives deep into why we turn to alcohol as our default decompression tool and offers genuinely effective alternatives that leave you feeling better, not worse. I share the powerful concept of identifying the feeling behind the drink – whether it's stress, anxiety, celebration, or simply wanting to shut off your brain – and how this awareness creates space for healthier choices.
From creating meaningful rituals (like savoring herbal tea or taking aromatic baths) to movement practices that release tension (even just "wiggling it out"!), these practical strategies address the root needs that drinking temporarily numbs. We explore how prayer, creative expression, and authentic connection can fulfill our deepest desires for escape and relief while keeping us fully present in our one beautiful life.
The highlight of this episode is the Dopamine Menu – a game-changing tool that categorizes mood-boosting activities. This structured approach eliminates decision fatigue when cravings strike.
Ready to discover what's waiting on the other side of that drink?
Download the Dopamine Menu template and take one small step this week toward unwinding in ways that honor your mind, body, and soul. Remember – alcohol doesn't bring out your best self. It keeps you from discovering it.
Dopamine Menu: https://the-catholic-sobriety-coach.myflodesk.com/dopaminemenu
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Catholic Sobriety Podcast, the
go-to resource for women seekingto have a deeper understanding
of the role alcohol plays intheir lives, women who are
looking to drink less or not atall for any reason.
I am your host, christi Walker.
I'm a wife, mom and ajoy-filled Catholic, and I am
(00:22):
the Catholic Sobriety Coach, andI am so glad you're here.
Today.
We are going to be tackling atopic that I think so many of us
can relate to, which is findingways to unwind that don't
involve pouring a drink.
(00:42):
Whether you are sober, curious,cutting back or simply trying
to create healthier habits, Ithink you will love this
conversation.
So here's the truth Life isoverwhelming sometimes and it's
normal to want a break.
Maybe it's just been one ofthose days where everything
(01:06):
feels so heavy, or maybe youjust want a moment to yourself
to have some space and tobreathe.
I've been there.
But if you've been turning toalcohol as your go-to relief or
as your way out alcohol as yourgo-to relief or as your way out
(01:28):
there's a pretty good chancethat maybe you have started to
wonder is this really the bestoption for me?
Can I find something else thatfeels good and leaves me in a
better place, something thatdoesn't cause all this chaos in
my head.
If that's where you are, I wantyou to pause, take a deep
(01:52):
breath.
You are in the right place, andwe are going to talk about how
you'll be able to escape, relaxand cope without using alcohol.
Now stick around till the end,because I have a tool that I've
been using with the ladies thatjoined my Freedom 46 Lenten
(02:17):
Challenge.
They are loving it.
I'm having my family use it.
They are loving it, and I thinkyou will love it too.
I'm also going to have adigital download with examples
of this tool in my show notes.
So, again, stick around andfind out what that is.
The first thing that reallyneeds to happen is to identify
(02:41):
the feeling behind the drink.
So when you feel that urge,come up, take a moment and ask
yourself this question why do Ireach for the drink in the first
place?
Is it to numb stress?
Is it to quiet anxiety?
Is it to celebrate something?
(03:03):
Or maybe is it simply to switchoff your brain for a bit?
I've had some women say thathaving that drink kind of puts
them into the second half oftheir day.
So they have the first half ofthe day and then having a drink
(03:23):
then delineates for them like oh, this is my time Now.
Something that I suggest is tospend time journaling about this
specific question why do Ireach for the drink in the first
place?
Once you identify that, thenyou're already halfway there,
(03:46):
because now you can meet thatneed in a whole new way.
What are those alternativesgoing to be without the drink?
Because drinking is easy.
Opening up that wine bottle,pouring it in the glass, having
a sip and the effects that comefrom that is easy.
(04:09):
When you have to stop and think, then your brain just is like
you know what, sis, this is toohard.
You know what's a lot easier.
Let's reach for the drink.
Let's reach for the drink.
(04:30):
But I'm going to give you sometips and tools, really, that you
can use, starting today, tohave some healthier ways to
de-stress or cope, so that youcan resist those urges to drink
Now.
The first is to create a ritualfor yourself.
It's no secret, we arecreatures of habit and rituals
(04:50):
hold so much power.
So if grabbing a drink at theend of the day has been your
ritual, I suggest replacing itwith something more meaningful
and healthier.
So maybe brew a cup of herbaltea.
Light a candle, take a bath ora shower with essential oils.
(05:12):
Make it an experience thatsignals to your brain you're
decompressing.
Now, for me, I love lighting alavender candle, putting on some
soft music.
It might sound super simple,but it gives my mind and body
(05:33):
the ability to shift gears in away that feels almost indulgent.
So that is what you are lookingfor.
The second is to move your body.
I know, I know, some of you arerolling your eyes at the
thought of exercise, but pleasehear me out are rolling your
(05:58):
eyes at the thought of exercise,but please hear me out.
When we move, even if it's agentle movement, our bodies
release endorphins, which is anatural feel-good hormone.
Now, it could be 10 minutes ofstretching, it could be a slow
evening walk or even dancingaround your living room to your
favorite songs.
Keep in mind this movementisn't necessarily about weight
(06:21):
loss or fitness goals.
It's actually about justshifting your energy and
releasing the stress that buildsup through your day, up through
your day.
One of my clients has said thatwhat she loves to do is, when
she starts to feel that tensionin her body, she just takes a
(06:42):
moment and she just wiggles itout.
I used to do this with my kids.
I'd be like get your wigglesout, get your wiggles out, like
before we went into a store orchurch or something.
And that's what she does.
She just like gets her wigglesout, wiggling her arms, wiggling
her legs, wiggling her head.
And I've tried it and honestly,it feels really good.
(07:06):
I mean, you might not want todo it in a public place, but you
know, when you're in thecomfort of your own home, just
get the wiggles out and it'd bereally fun to have your kids do
it with you.
I'm sure they would absolutelylove it.
So try that and let me know howit goes.
This client, she loves it, sheswears by it.
(07:28):
So when she has that craving orurge or tension in her body,
she just wiggles it out.
The next is to practiceprayerful escapes.
Now you don't need to spendhours.
Just take five to 10 minutesPause and breathe deeply.
(07:48):
You can put on some, like Ilove Gregorian chant.
If you have the Halo app, youcan.
There's tons of stuff on there.
If you don't, there's otherones.
Even just putting together likea Spotify playlist that helps
calm you.
Or like, for me, my brain canmove a million miles an hour.
(08:11):
So I like having music, even ifit's like lo-fi music or
something.
It just helps me if I'm tryingto journal or read, just to have
some of that going in thebackground.
Actually, when I listened toBible in a Year, I use the Halo
app and this is not an ad forthe Halo app, I'm not sponsored,
(08:32):
by the way I just really loveit.
You have the ability to have,like some background music going
, and so I do have some softGregorian chant going in the
background and for me, I justlove that, especially like right
now we're in the middle of Lentas I'm recording this episode.
Recording this episode and thispractice has helped me so much
(08:58):
with my intentions, with myfasting, with the things that
I'm trying to stay away from.
So when I feel the pull or atemptation, especially if I'm
stressed and I'm looking to kindof buffer instead of reaching
for my phone or whatever it is,now I can just take a few
minutes and breathe deeply, puton whatever I want to listen to
(09:23):
and journal or read, and thathelps so much.
So another alternative is toreally explore creative
expression.
I mean, when was the last timeyou got creative for fun?
I'm talking about writing,painting, journaling, playing
with watercolors, even baking.
(09:43):
These activities can give yourmind that escape it craves, but
it will leave you feeling proudand accomplished instead of
guilty or exhausted, will leaveyou feeling proud and
accomplished instead of guiltyor exhausted.
So think about those thingsthat you maybe used to love
doing and you haven't done inyears.
Maybe it's time to pick thatback up or find a new hobby.
(10:08):
And the fifth way to kind ofescape without the drink is to
connect with others.
So sometimes drinking may feellike your default way of
socializing or relaxing withothers.
But what if you mix things up?
What if you propose a coffeedate?
Or maybe you host a girls nightand instead of having wine you
(10:30):
get all the fixings for like amocktail bar and let people
create and explore what it'slike to have mocktails.
You can even use like afunctional spirit alternative.
I like three spiritnon-alcoholic elixirs and you
just put a little bit inwhatever mocktail you're making
(10:53):
and it just gives it a littlekick and it does.
I think that it has like acalming effect, but I think it
probably depends on the person.
But there are so many thingsout there that you can try that
are great substitutes foralcohol and are way better for
you or alcohol and are waybetter for you.
Here's the thing you might besurprised at the depth of
(11:17):
connection that you feel whenalcohol is out of the picture.
This is something that I alsohear from the women that I work
with.
They may attend an event wherepreviously they had always had
drinks and those types of things.
Then they attended alcohol-freeevents and they come away from
(11:38):
it with a completely differentperspective, and the thing that
most of them say is that theywere able to be fully present.
And that's the goal.
We don't want to escape fromthis one beautiful life that the
Lord has given us.
We want to live it to the full.
(11:59):
The Lord has given us.
We want to live it to the full.
The thing is, alcohol doesn'tbring out your best self.
It actually keeps you fromdiscovering it.
It keeps you from living fullypresent and fully alive.
And once you realize that youcan have fun and be completely
(12:21):
yourself without alcohol, thatis going to be a game changer.
That is when everything isgoing to change.
When you realize that you cancope with stress, that you can
relax, that you can feel goodwithout alcohol, that is going
to change everything.
(12:42):
Every time I talk with a womanwho has been alcohol-free for a
while or has greatly reduced theamount of alcohol she consumes,
over and over again, I hearjust how amazing she feels, how
glad she is that she investedthe time that she works, through
(13:08):
the discomfort, to build upthose sober muscles so that she
can have confidence, and onceyou do that, you will experience
life in a whole new, beautifulway.
Now, before I close, I did saythat I would share a tool with
you that has been working wellfor my Freedom 46 women, my
(13:32):
Sacred Sobriety Lab women, andit is called the Dopamine Menu
or a Dopa Menu.
Is called the dopamine menu ora dopa menu.
It's a tool that was created in2020 by YouTuber Jessica McCabe
, who is the author of how toADHD.
This dopamine menu is a way toboost your happiness, because
(13:54):
really, that's what we arelooking for when we are reaching
for alcohol.
We're looking for that dopaminespike, because when we consume
alcohol, it spikes our dopamine.
Actually, even thinking aboutand planning out when you're
going to drink, what you'regoing to drink, and all of those
(14:15):
types of things, those alsocreate little dopamine spikes in
your brain throughout the day.
You may have heard about thisbecause it's pretty popular, I
guess, with TikTok users.
I'm not on TikTok, but it's onother social media channels.
I honestly don't know where Ilearned about this, but I'm so
(14:37):
glad that I did, because it is away to stimulate dopamine,
which is a hormone and aneurotransmitter that is in our
brain and it is known as thefeel-good hormone.
Now it's my understanding thatthis dopamine menu is actually a
rebranding of whatpsychologists and other
(14:58):
healthcare professionals used tocall a behavioral activation,
but that doesn't sound soexciting.
I really like the dopamine menu.
So let me just give you areally quick, brief rundown of
what is included on the dopaminemenu and then I will include in
(15:20):
my show notes a download.
You can download an exampledopamine menu with your own fill
in the blank worksheet.
So it starts out just like mostmenus do, with an appetizer.
The appetizers on your dopaminemenu are short activities,
(15:40):
things that you can quicklyimplement and use in a pinch.
So you have a craving thatcomes up and you're looking for
something really quick that cangive you that dopamine spike.
It can really be anything fromsavoring a cup of coffee to
going on a quick walk.
(16:01):
Now the next is entrees or maincourses.
So these activities are goingto take longer.
They're just going to requiremore effort, and that's okay,
because sometimes you needsomething a bit more substantial
.
This could be cooking yourfavorite meal, finishing a book,
(16:22):
taking a shower, going to thegym, making a nice meal, meeting
up with a friend.
So, for me, I love vacuuming.
It's one of those things thatmakes me feel accomplished.
Sometimes, when I'm working inthe day and I'm starting to feel
a little antsy or stressed, wehave a stick vac that I can get
(16:44):
out really quickly.
It's a lot lighter and smallerthan my regular vacuum and I may
, just, as an appetizer, getthat out and vacuum one room and
then I come back upstairs and Ido my work and I actually feel
really good.
If I was going to make thatinto a main course, I would
probably get out my biggervacuum and vacuum all the main
(17:07):
areas downstairs.
I might even do upstairs.
So it really just depends onhow much time you have and what
you're wanting to do.
The next part of the dopaminemenu is a side dish.
Now, just like it sounds, theside dish goes with something
else, so this could be listeningto music, a podcast, an
(17:29):
audiobook while you're walkingor cleaning the house.
It could be calling a friendwhile you're walking.
Obviously, I like to walk anddo things at the same time.
You're walking.
Obviously, I like to walk anddo things at the same time.
One of my favorite things is toset a timer and play beat the
clock, where I try to getsomething done.
Maybe I'll say I am going todeclutter this drawer and I'm
(17:53):
giving myself five minutes andit's kind of a game to my brain.
So setting the timer goes alongwith cleaning.
Then the next thing is dessert.
Now these are things we do inmoderation, like scrolling on
social media, maybe watching TVor a movie, playing a game, or
(18:14):
taking yourself out for coffeeor lunch or something, and then
the last thing is called special.
So these are things that werarely do but are really great
for spiking our dopamine.
So that can be traveling oreven planning a trip, enjoying a
(18:36):
concert, going shopping.
There's so many things that youcan do that you will look
forward to that, you can plan,and even just the planning
spikes your dopamine and thenthinking about it coming up.
For example, we planned a tripto Hawaii last year with our
(18:57):
kids Hawaii last year with ourkids, and I swear, every time we
did a little something else asthe date was coming closer to
when we got to go.
I loved it, okay.
So I'm going to go ahead andput that in the show notes, the
download for that.
Again, it's just my example,and then I have a blank template
(19:18):
for you.
Now I want you to remember whenyou choose alternatives to
alcohol, you are actually givingyourself a gift.
You are telling yourself I canwork through this, I can take
care of myself in a way thathonors my mind, body and soul,
(19:41):
and that is an incredible act ofholy self-care.
Now I want you to walk awayfrom this episode feeling
empowered and not overwhelmed.
So I invite you to start withone small step this week.
Maybe that's a walk, maybethat's a cup of tea or five deep
(20:03):
breaths at the end of the day,whatever feels good to you.
Maybe that's starting yourdopamine menu.
You don't have to finish it allin one sitting, but just start
thinking about it, and you knowit's not a one and done thing.
You can always add to it ifsomething else comes up.
And then I just want you toremember that growth takes time.
(20:27):
Progress over perfection.
Be patient with yourself as youfigure out what works for you.
What works for you might notwork for me or your sister or
your best friend.
So just give yourself grace onthe days that you still feel
tempted and take it as alearning experience.
(20:48):
You are allowed to learn as yougo.
Let me repeat that you areallowed to learn as you go.
Thank you so much for spendingtime with me today.
I hope you feel inspired toexplore these alternatives and
(21:08):
find ways to unwind thatactually fill your cup.
You are not alone on this path.
I am cheering for you everystep of the way.
I am cheering for you.
(21:47):
I am praying for you.
You are not alone.
Welcome to the Catholic Sobriety Podcast, the
go-to resource for women seekingto have a deeper understanding
of the role alcohol plays intheir lives, women who are
looking to drink less or not atall for any reason.
I am your host, christi Walker.
I'm a wife, mom and ajoy-filled Catholic, and I am
(00:22):
the Catholic Sobriety Coach, andI am so glad you're here.
Today.
We are going to be tackling atopic that I think so many of us
can relate to, which is findingways to unwind that don't
involve pouring a drink.
(00:42):
Whether you are sober, curious,cutting back or simply trying
to create healthier habits, Ithink you will love this
conversation.
So here's the truth Life isoverwhelming sometimes and it's
normal to want a break.
Maybe it's just been one ofthose days where everything
(01:06):
feels so heavy, or maybe youjust want a moment to yourself
to have some space and tobreathe.
I've been there.
But if you've been turning toalcohol as your go-to relief or
as your way out alcohol as yourgo-to relief or as your way out
(01:28):
there's a pretty good chancethat maybe you have started to
wonder is this really the bestoption for me?
Can I find something else thatfeels good and leaves me in a
better place, something thatdoesn't cause all this chaos in
my head.
If that's where you are, I wantyou to pause, take a deep
(01:52):
breath.
You are in the right place, andwe are going to talk about how
you'll be able to escape, relaxand cope without using alcohol.
Now stick around till the end,because I have a tool that I've
been using with the ladies thatjoined my Freedom 46 Lenten
(02:17):
Challenge.
They are loving it.
I'm having my family use it.
They are loving it, and I thinkyou will love it too.
I'm also going to have adigital download with examples
of this tool in my show notes.
So, again, stick around andfind out what that is.
The first thing that reallyneeds to happen is to identify
(02:41):
the feeling behind the drink.
So when you feel that urge,come up, take a moment and ask
yourself this question why do Ireach for the drink in the first
place?
Is it to numb stress?
Is it to quiet anxiety?
Is it to celebrate something?
(03:03):
Or maybe is it simply to switchoff your brain for a bit?
I've had some women say thathaving that drink kind of puts
them into the second half oftheir day.
So they have the first half ofthe day and then having a drink
(03:23):
then delineates for them like oh, this is my time Now.
Something that I suggest is tospend time journaling about this
specific question why do Ireach for the drink in the first
place?
Once you identify that, thenyou're already halfway there,
(03:46):
because now you can meet thatneed in a whole new way.
What are those alternativesgoing to be without the drink?
Because drinking is easy.
Opening up that wine bottle,pouring it in the glass, having
a sip and the effects that comefrom that is easy.
(04:09):
When you have to stop and think, then your brain just is like
you know what, sis, this is toohard.
You know what's a lot easier.
Let's reach for the drink.
Let's reach for the drink.
(04:30):
But I'm going to give you sometips and tools, really, that you
can use, starting today, tohave some healthier ways to
de-stress or cope, so that youcan resist those urges to drink
Now.
The first is to create a ritualfor yourself.
It's no secret, we arecreatures of habit and rituals
(04:50):
hold so much power.
So if grabbing a drink at theend of the day has been your
ritual, I suggest replacing itwith something more meaningful
and healthier.
So maybe brew a cup of herbaltea.
Light a candle, take a bath ora shower with essential oils.
(05:12):
Make it an experience thatsignals to your brain you're
decompressing.
Now, for me, I love lighting alavender candle, putting on some
soft music.
It might sound super simple,but it gives my mind and body
(05:33):
the ability to shift gears in away that feels almost indulgent.
So that is what you are lookingfor.
The second is to move your body.
I know, I know, some of you arerolling your eyes at the
thought of exercise, but pleasehear me out are rolling your
(05:58):
eyes at the thought of exercise,but please hear me out.
When we move, even if it's agentle movement, our bodies
release endorphins, which is anatural feel-good hormone.
Now, it could be 10 minutes ofstretching, it could be a slow
evening walk or even dancingaround your living room to your
favorite songs.
Keep in mind this movementisn't necessarily about weight
(06:21):
loss or fitness goals.
It's actually about justshifting your energy and
releasing the stress that buildsup through your day, up through
your day.
One of my clients has said thatwhat she loves to do is, when
she starts to feel that tensionin her body, she just takes a
(06:42):
moment and she just wiggles itout.
I used to do this with my kids.
I'd be like get your wigglesout, get your wiggles out, like
before we went into a store orchurch or something.
And that's what she does.
She just like gets her wigglesout, wiggling her arms, wiggling
her legs, wiggling her head.
And I've tried it and honestly,it feels really good.
(07:06):
I mean, you might not want todo it in a public place, but you
know, when you're in thecomfort of your own home, just
get the wiggles out and it'd bereally fun to have your kids do
it with you.
I'm sure they would absolutelylove it.
So try that and let me know howit goes.
This client, she loves it, sheswears by it.
(07:28):
So when she has that craving orurge or tension in her body,
she just wiggles it out.
The next is to practiceprayerful escapes.
Now you don't need to spendhours.
Just take five to 10 minutesPause and breathe deeply.
(07:48):
You can put on some, like Ilove Gregorian chant.
If you have the Halo app, youcan.
There's tons of stuff on there.
If you don't, there's otherones.
Even just putting together likea Spotify playlist that helps
calm you.
Or like, for me, my brain canmove a million miles an hour.
(08:11):
So I like having music, even ifit's like lo-fi music or
something.
It just helps me if I'm tryingto journal or read, just to have
some of that going in thebackground.
Actually, when I listened toBible in a Year, I use the Halo
app and this is not an ad forthe Halo app, I'm not sponsored,
(08:32):
by the way I just really loveit.
You have the ability to have,like some background music going
, and so I do have some softGregorian chant going in the
background and for me, I justlove that, especially like right
now we're in the middle of Lentas I'm recording this episode.
Recording this episode and thispractice has helped me so much
(08:58):
with my intentions, with myfasting, with the things that
I'm trying to stay away from.
So when I feel the pull or atemptation, especially if I'm
stressed and I'm looking to kindof buffer instead of reaching
for my phone or whatever it is,now I can just take a few
minutes and breathe deeply, puton whatever I want to listen to
(09:23):
and journal or read, and thathelps so much.
So another alternative is toreally explore creative
expression.
I mean, when was the last timeyou got creative for fun?
I'm talking about writing,painting, journaling, playing
with watercolors, even baking.
(09:43):
These activities can give yourmind that escape it craves, but
it will leave you feeling proudand accomplished instead of
guilty or exhausted, will leaveyou feeling proud and
accomplished instead of guiltyor exhausted.
So think about those thingsthat you maybe used to love
doing and you haven't done inyears.
Maybe it's time to pick thatback up or find a new hobby.
(10:08):
And the fifth way to kind ofescape without the drink is to
connect with others.
So sometimes drinking may feellike your default way of
socializing or relaxing withothers.
But what if you mix things up?
What if you propose a coffeedate?
Or maybe you host a girls nightand instead of having wine you
(10:30):
get all the fixings for like amocktail bar and let people
create and explore what it'slike to have mocktails.
You can even use like afunctional spirit alternative.
I like three spiritnon-alcoholic elixirs and you
just put a little bit inwhatever mocktail you're making
(10:53):
and it just gives it a littlekick and it does.
I think that it has like acalming effect, but I think it
probably depends on the person.
But there are so many thingsout there that you can try that
are great substitutes foralcohol and are way better for
you or alcohol and are waybetter for you.
Here's the thing you might besurprised at the depth of
(11:17):
connection that you feel whenalcohol is out of the picture.
This is something that I alsohear from the women that I work
with.
They may attend an event wherepreviously they had always had
drinks and those types of things.
Then they attended alcohol-freeevents and they come away from
(11:38):
it with a completely differentperspective, and the thing that
most of them say is that theywere able to be fully present.
And that's the goal.
We don't want to escape fromthis one beautiful life that the
Lord has given us.
We want to live it to the full.
(11:59):
The Lord has given us.
We want to live it to the full.
The thing is, alcohol doesn'tbring out your best self.
It actually keeps you fromdiscovering it.
It keeps you from living fullypresent and fully alive.
And once you realize that youcan have fun and be completely
(12:21):
yourself without alcohol, thatis going to be a game changer.
That is when everything isgoing to change.
When you realize that you cancope with stress, that you can
relax, that you can feel goodwithout alcohol, that is going
to change everything.
(12:42):
Every time I talk with a womanwho has been alcohol-free for a
while or has greatly reduced theamount of alcohol she consumes,
over and over again, I hearjust how amazing she feels, how
glad she is that she investedthe time that she works, through
(13:08):
the discomfort, to build upthose sober muscles so that she
can have confidence, and onceyou do that, you will experience
life in a whole new, beautifulway.
Now, before I close, I did saythat I would share a tool with
you that has been working wellfor my Freedom 46 women, my
(13:32):
Sacred Sobriety Lab women, andit is called the Dopamine Menu
or a Dopa Menu.
Is called the dopamine menu ora dopa menu.
It's a tool that was created in2020 by YouTuber Jessica McCabe
, who is the author of how toADHD.
This dopamine menu is a way toboost your happiness, because
(13:54):
really, that's what we arelooking for when we are reaching
for alcohol.
We're looking for that dopaminespike, because when we consume
alcohol, it spikes our dopamine.
Actually, even thinking aboutand planning out when you're
going to drink, what you'regoing to drink, and all of those
(14:15):
types of things, those alsocreate little dopamine spikes in
your brain throughout the day.
You may have heard about thisbecause it's pretty popular, I
guess, with TikTok users.
I'm not on TikTok, but it's onother social media channels.
I honestly don't know where Ilearned about this, but I'm so
(14:37):
glad that I did, because it is away to stimulate dopamine,
which is a hormone and aneurotransmitter that is in our
brain and it is known as thefeel-good hormone.
Now it's my understanding thatthis dopamine menu is actually a
rebranding of whatpsychologists and other
(14:58):
healthcare professionals used tocall a behavioral activation,
but that doesn't sound soexciting.
I really like the dopamine menu.
So let me just give you areally quick, brief rundown of
what is included on the dopaminemenu and then I will include in
(15:20):
my show notes a download.
You can download an exampledopamine menu with your own fill
in the blank worksheet.
So it starts out just like mostmenus do, with an appetizer.
The appetizers on your dopaminemenu are short activities,
(15:40):
things that you can quicklyimplement and use in a pinch.
So you have a craving thatcomes up and you're looking for
something really quick that cangive you that dopamine spike.
It can really be anything fromsavoring a cup of coffee to
going on a quick walk.
(16:01):
Now the next is entrees or maincourses.
So these activities are goingto take longer.
They're just going to requiremore effort, and that's okay,
because sometimes you needsomething a bit more substantial
.
This could be cooking yourfavorite meal, finishing a book,
(16:22):
taking a shower, going to thegym, making a nice meal, meeting
up with a friend.
So, for me, I love vacuuming.
It's one of those things thatmakes me feel accomplished.
Sometimes, when I'm working inthe day and I'm starting to feel
a little antsy or stressed, wehave a stick vac that I can get
(16:44):
out really quickly.
It's a lot lighter and smallerthan my regular vacuum and I may
, just, as an appetizer, getthat out and vacuum one room and
then I come back upstairs and Ido my work and I actually feel
really good.
If I was going to make thatinto a main course, I would
probably get out my biggervacuum and vacuum all the main
(17:07):
areas downstairs.
I might even do upstairs.
So it really just depends onhow much time you have and what
you're wanting to do.
The next part of the dopaminemenu is a side dish.
Now, just like it sounds, theside dish goes with something
else, so this could be listeningto music, a podcast, an
(17:29):
audiobook while you're walkingor cleaning the house.
It could be calling a friendwhile you're walking.
Obviously, I like to walk anddo things at the same time.
You're walking.
Obviously, I like to walk anddo things at the same time.
One of my favorite things is toset a timer and play beat the
clock, where I try to getsomething done.
Maybe I'll say I am going todeclutter this drawer and I'm
(17:53):
giving myself five minutes andit's kind of a game to my brain.
So setting the timer goes alongwith cleaning.
Then the next thing is dessert.
Now these are things we do inmoderation, like scrolling on
social media, maybe watching TVor a movie, playing a game, or
(18:14):
taking yourself out for coffeeor lunch or something, and then
the last thing is called special.
So these are things that werarely do but are really great
for spiking our dopamine.
So that can be traveling oreven planning a trip, enjoying a
(18:36):
concert, going shopping.
There's so many things that youcan do that you will look
forward to that, you can plan,and even just the planning
spikes your dopamine and thenthinking about it coming up.
For example, we planned a tripto Hawaii last year with our
(18:57):
kids Hawaii last year with ourkids, and I swear, every time we
did a little something else asthe date was coming closer to
when we got to go.
I loved it, okay.
So I'm going to go ahead andput that in the show notes, the
download for that.
Again, it's just my example,and then I have a blank template
(19:18):
for you.
Now I want you to remember whenyou choose alternatives to
alcohol, you are actually givingyourself a gift.
You are telling yourself I canwork through this, I can take
care of myself in a way thathonors my mind, body and soul,
(19:41):
and that is an incredible act ofholy self-care.
Now I want you to walk awayfrom this episode feeling
empowered and not overwhelmed.
So I invite you to start withone small step this week.
Maybe that's a walk, maybethat's a cup of tea or five deep
(20:03):
breaths at the end of the day,whatever feels good to you.
Maybe that's starting yourdopamine menu.
You don't have to finish it allin one sitting, but just start
thinking about it, and you knowit's not a one and done thing.
You can always add to it ifsomething else comes up.
And then I just want you toremember that growth takes time.
(20:27):
Progress over perfection.
Be patient with yourself as youfigure out what works for you.
What works for you might notwork for me or your sister or
your best friend.
So just give yourself grace onthe days that you still feel
tempted and take it as alearning experience.
(20:48):
You are allowed to learn as yougo.
Let me repeat that you areallowed to learn as you go.
Thank you so much for spendingtime with me today.
I hope you feel inspired toexplore these alternatives and
(21:08):
find ways to unwind thatactually fill your cup.
You are not alone on this path.
I am cheering for you everystep of the way.
I am cheering for you.
(21:47):
I am praying for you.
You are not alone.
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