October 23, 2025 • 26 mins
Because sometimes, freedom starts with letting go.
In this hilariously honest and freeing episode, Christy-Faith invites listeners into the “We Do Not Care Club” — the homeschool mom edition. From shrugging off comparison to redefining “normal,” she shares five things homeschool moms simply don’t care about anymore — and why that’s something to celebrate. After all, homeschooling isn’t about being a better version of school — it’s about choosing a better way of life.
The Christy-Faith Show | Ep. 88
🛠️ LINKS & RESOURCES
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Thrive Homeschool Community
Join Christy-Faith’s online community for mentorship, encouragement, and real friendships that last:
👉 https://christy-faith.com/thrive
Christy-Faith’s List
A curated directory of homeschool-friendly service providers, businesses, and colleges:
👉 https://christy-faiths-list.com
Christy-Faith’s Book: Homeschool Rising
📖 Encouragement and strategy for starting strong or starting over:
👉 https://christy-faith.com/book-homeschool-rising
🎙️ SHOW SPONSORS
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OTHER EPISODES FOR YOU 👀
Does Homeschooling Shelter Your Kids Too Much?
🔗 https://christy-faith.com/podcast/does-homeschooling-shelter-your-kids-too-much/
The Biggest Myths About Homeschool Socialization
🔗 https://christy-faith.com/podcast/the-biggest-myths-about-homeschool-socialization/
Are Schools Killing a Love for Learning?
🔗 https://christy-faith.com/podcast/are-schools-killing-a-love-of-learning/
🎧 SHOW RECAP
In this laugh-out-loud yet deeply freeing episode, Christy-Faith helps you:
✅ Let go of comparison and reclaim joy in homeschooling
✅ Understand why homeschooling isn’t about being “a better school” — it’s a different world entirely
✅ See why “weird” kids are actually confident, creative, and thriving
✅ Learn why “indoctrination” arguments miss the mark — every system teaches a worldview
✅ Ditch the obsession with educational “standards” and rediscover real learning
✅ Recognize that your kids aren’t missing out — they’re living fully, freely, and authentically
If you’ve ever felt judged for your homeschooling choices or pressured to defend them, this episode will make you laugh, nod, and finally exhale.
📌 Be sure to like, subscribe, and share this episode. And grab the free gift!
💬 What’s your “We Do Not Care” moment as a homeschool mom? Comment and tell Christy-Faith — your story might make it into her next video!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Christy-Faith (00:00):
Okay, homeschool moms. Let's get real for a
(00:02):
second. Today's episode, it's alittle snarky, it's a little
spicy, and a whole lot of fun.Will I regret it later? Maybe.
But, hey, we're here to live,laugh, and learn. Right? So
here's the scoop. Today, we'retalking about five things
homeschool moms just do not careabout. I decided to do this
episode after I made a videothat popped on social media
(00:25):
where I joked about opening ahomeschool mom's chapter of the
We Do Not Care Club.
I'll link that video in the shownotes so you can see what all
the fuss is about. But you guyscracked me up in the comments
telling me all the things you,as a homeschool mom, do not care
about. Now if you're notfamiliar with the We Do Not Care
(00:45):
Club, let me catch you up. It'sthis brilliant movement started
by this woman named MelanieSanders on TikTok. She's all
about women in perimenopause,menopause, and post menopause
ditching the pressure to careabout things that just don't
matter, like arm fat, matchingsocks, or whether or not yoga
(01:06):
pants will ever actually see theyoga mat.
Her videos are funny. They arefreeing, and it's exactly the
kind of energy we need in thehomeschool world. Because let's
be honest, between lesson plans,chore charts, snack requests,
and the occasional existentialcrisis, we do not have time to
care about what the peanutgallery thinks. Nope. Not today,
(01:28):
Satan.
But here's the twist. This showtoday isn't just about getting a
good laugh. I think the reasonwhy videos like this hit home is
because homeschooling comes witha major mindset shift. Such a
shift that there's even a fancyword for it, deschooling, which
by the way, I do dive into in mybook Homeschool Rising. I have a
(01:49):
little chapter on it.
So grab that laundry, yoursecret chocolate stash that I
know you have, and maybe hide inthe closet for a bit because
let's go over things that we ashomeschool moms just do not have
time to care about. Hello.Welcome to the show. Before we
(02:15):
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Yes. Major medical? Yes.Wellness visits? Yes.
(03:21):
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(04:05):
Okay. Let's have some fun. Sothe We Do Not Care Club is a
movement about people that tryto tell us what to do or
naysayers about our lifechoices. And so the We Do Not
Care Club is kind of likehomeschool moms clapping back
with the comments that we hearabout things we don't care
about. The first one today, Idid mention in that video, and
(04:27):
this is what I said in thevideo.
I said, we do not care that yourkids go to a good school or a
charter school. It is a school,and we don't want it. Here's the
thing. When we say wehomeschool, some people feel the
need to explain to us why theydon't. Oh, but my kids go to a
really good charter school.
Or, oh, the school we're at isamazing. It has small class
(04:51):
sizes and a STEM program.Listen. That's fine and good for
you, but let's be clear. Thisisn't a comparison.
A school versus homeschool isnot apples to apples. It's not
even apples to oranges. It'sapples to, I don't know, a
completely different planet.Because here's the thing,
homeschooling isn't aboutfinding a better version of
(05:13):
school. It's about rejecting theentire premise of school.
We don't accept school as thedefault option for childhood.
It's about saying we don't needthe bells, the tests, the
grades, or the system. So whilewe're happy for you and your own
choices and your amazing charterschool, We're over here doing
something completely different.We're building an education that
(05:36):
fits our kids, not forcing ourkids to fit into an education.
As John Holt said, what is mostimportant and valuable about the
home as a base for children'sgrowth into the world is not
that it is a better school thanthe schools, but that it isn't a
school at all.
And that's why we don't care howgood your school is. We're not
(05:59):
doing school. The next thingthat we do not care about is
that our kids are weird. Wedon't care that you think our
kids are weird. We love it.
It's kind of the point. Soplease don't come to us with all
of your socialization jargon. Wejust don't care. So let's just
get this out of the way. Canhomeschool kids present
(06:20):
differently?
Yes. Can they be quirky? Arethey unique? And do they not
always fit into the neat littleboxes that society has created
for typical kids? Yes.
But here's the red pill, youguys. Those boxes, they're
suffocating. They're notdesigned to help kids thrive.
They're designed to make kidseasier to manage. They teach
(06:42):
kids that fitting in is moreimportant than being themselves.
Wear the right shoes. Say theright things. Don't stand out.
Don't make waves. Here's thedanger.
When kids are taught eitherexplicitly in school or
implicitly in their socialcircles that the most important
thing is to fit in or else, theylose their courage to be
(07:04):
different, and they start tobelieve that who they are isn't
enough. Sadly, I know many kidsin public schools today that
really have the choice betweenfitting in or social suicide.
Let me know in the comments ifthat was you growing up. We just
had an experience with a kiddoon our football team, and this
(07:24):
was what he was facing. He stoodup for something that was right
at school, chose to not fit inand go with the crowd, and he
got bullied for it for the restof the year.
See, fitting in doesn't buildconfidence. It actually erodes
it. It teaches kids to hidetheir quirks, to silence their
ideas, and to trade authenticityfor approval. And that's not
(07:45):
just sad. That's dangerous.
That's damaging. The worlddoesn't need more people who
know how to blend in. It needspeople who know how to stand
out, to speak up, and tounapologetically be themselves.
And that's what we're doing overhere in homeschool world with
our kids. So when people come atyou with the tired old, but what
(08:06):
about socialization argument orsay that, oh, I can spot a
homeschooler a mile away.
Guess what? I can too, and I canalso spot a public school kid a
mile away. And news flash,that's one of the reasons why we
homeschool. Socialization? Youmean the kind where kids are
crammed into a room with 30other kids their exact same age
(08:28):
and told to sit down, be quiet,conform, and raise your hand if
you need to go to the bathroom?
No. Thanks. Our kids are out inthe real world with us, engaging
with people of all ages,learning how to hold meaningful
conversations, have eye contact,and build relationships based on
who they are, not where theyhappen to live. They're not
(08:49):
confined by artificial bubblesof same age peers, whether they
have the most recent iPhone orthe right shoes. They're free to
connect with others over sharedpassions, not shared ZIP codes.
And that that's realsocialization, the kind that
actually prepares kids for life,not just fitting in to a system.
(09:09):
So, yes, if homeschooling makesour kids weird, I'm here for it.
They're gloriously,unapologetically weird because
what you see as a flaw, I see asa flex. Okay. Okay.
So I need to take a breathbecause when you get me started
on socialization, I will gonuts. By the way, if you need
more on this, I have an entirechapter on socialization in my
(09:32):
book, Homeschool Rising. You canget it on Amazon Prime. Alright.
So I'm just getting warmed up.
Oh, I got more for you. Yes, Ido. And we'll get into it right
after this. As a homeschool momwho values a family together
approach and leans towards theclassical and Charlotte Mason
styles, I often struggle tobring my educational vision to
life with my kids' diverse agesand learning needs. With all our
(09:53):
interests and super packedschedule, bridging that gap
between the dreamy homeschool Iwant and reality, I gotta be
honest.
It's a challenge. Now, yes, Iknow perfection isn't the goal.
But if you're listening and youcould use a little easing of
your mental load in your day today, I found a resource that has
become the quiet hero of ourroutine, and it could be a
really great option for you too.BJU Press homeschool curriculum.
(10:15):
Now many think that BJU Presshomeschool is solely an all in
one option, and though it doesexcel in that role, did you know
you can also opt for specificcourses and tailor them to fit
your family's needs just as Ihave?
BGU Press Homeschool providesthe perfect balance of structure
and flexibility and easilycomplements my family's mixed
age family together on the couchlearning style. They are second
(10:38):
to none in integrating abiblical worldview, stimulating
critical thinking, and offeringtons of hands on activities in
the lessons. To find out how BJUPress Homeschool can come
alongside you in yourhomeschooling goals too. Visit
bjupresshomeschool.com or clickthe link in the show notes.
Before we continue, I wannashare with you a program that's
been a game changer for ourhomeschool.
(10:59):
At our center, we instructed andhelped kids through pretty much
every math program on the marketand know firsthand just how
important a solid mathfoundation is for our kids'
futures. As a career educatorwith high standards, finding the
right program that checked allthe boxes felt like too tall of
an order. Until one day, I triedCTC Math. CTC Math is an online
(11:19):
math curriculum for k to 12students with motivating
interactive lessons that allowkids to learn at their own pace.
It does all the teaching andgrading so you don't have to,
and their adaptive lessonsadjust so your child is
progressing confidently.
With CTC Math, your child isgetting a top notch education,
and you just made yourhomeschool life easier. Visit
ctcmath.com to start your freetrial today or click the link in
(11:41):
the show notes. Welcome back.Here's the third thing that we
do not care about. We do notcare that you think we are
indoctrinating our kids.
Here's the problem with thatargument. You think your
worldview is neutral. It's not.No one's is actually. Not even
mine.
Did you know that the publicschool system has a worldview?
(12:04):
It does. It's secular humanism.So while you're pointing fingers
at us for indoctrinating ourkids, I wanna be very clear. The
public school system is doingthe exact same thing.
The difference, though, is thatI am intellectually honest about
it. Not a single person on thisplanet has a neutral worldview.
We all see the world through ourlens of beliefs, values, and
(12:28):
experiences. And guess what? Weall have to educate our kids,
And the laws of our land, thankgoodness, still give us the
right to raise our children inour faith and according to our
values if we so choose.
And it gives you the same right.So I don't need to apologize
that I'm not outsourcing mykids' worldview to a system that
(12:50):
pretends to be neutral whilepushing its agenda. I'm teaching
my kids to think critically, toquestion everything, including
me, and to build a worldviewthat's rooted in truth, not in
convenience. And I'm certainlynot pushing them to conform.
That's not indoctrination.
That's parenting. I once had acommenter say, well,
homeschooling's okay as long asyou don't make them read the
(13:12):
Bible. And the pride behind thatcomment and the blindness to
their own biases, it was juststartling to me. People really
do think that the public schoolsystem is neutral. It's crazy.
Secular humanism is not neutral.Okay. On to the next. Now I love
this one because this is sodeschool y. Right?
(13:33):
We do not care about educationalstandards. And if you're
listening, you can't see my airquotes right now. This really
gets to people. Oh, the horror.We're not following the state's
standards and their curriculum.
No. We're not. We're notobsessing over standardized
tests. We don't care. Why?
(13:54):
Well, because the educationalstandards are relics of the
industrial revolution. They werenever designed to help kids
thrive. They were designed tocreate factory workers, workers
that would never question thestate, obedient, compliant, and
easy to replace. The more peoplegot to thinking for themselves,
the more inconvenient it was.And the people that created our
(14:16):
industrialized school system,they made no apologies about
this.
But whatever their intentionswere at the time, here's the
problem. That world is gone. Thesystem hasn't really changed,
and it's still preparing kidsfor a life of punching clocks
and following orders, while thereal world today demands
(14:37):
creativity, adaptability,independent thinking, and even
entrepreneurial skills. So we'renot interested in whether our
kids are grade level accordingto some arbitrary chart and know
a bunch of facts and can rattlethem off, which you and I both
know, we just forget it allanyway. What do you remember
from third grade science?
No. We're interested in whetherour kids are learning how to
(14:59):
solve problems, how to think forthemselves, and how to adapt to
a world that's constantlychanging. We're asking
ourselves, do our kids have theskills to thrive later on? And
let's be honest, who evendecides what the standard even
is? Who decides what's worthlearning and what's not?
Because I've seen what passesfor a curriculum these days, and
(15:21):
let's just say it's not exactlyinspiring. Whether or not our
kids are getting a goodeducation or not or are good
kids or good students does notdepend on if they can fill
bubbles in on an answer sheet orwhat grade they get on Friday's
test. We're here to raise kidswho can think, create, and lead.
(15:41):
And to do that, our homeschoolsneed to look a whole heck of a
lot different than theindustrialized school system.
So, no, we don't care about youreducational standards.
We're too busy over herebuilding an education that
actually prepares our kids fortheir future, not a past that no
longer exists. Before we moveon, I wanna pause for a second
and share something with youthat's a bit behind the scenes
(16:03):
and transparent. So if you don'tmind, I'm gonna pull back the
curtain for a second here on theshow. This show, the one you're
listening to right now. Ifyou've been nodding along saying
pop off girl throughout theepisode or wishing your
mother-in-law was hearing this,or you're maybe thinking of a
friend who needs to hear thisbecause she's feeling insecure
in her homeschooling right now,Would you take ten seconds of
(16:24):
your time right now to make acomment, share, subscribe to the
show, or even give me all thosefive stars if I deserve it?
I'm asking directly because thisshow is free to you, and I love
that, and I don't gatekeepanything. But the show is
sponsored. That's how I'm ableto invest so much into you guys.
And what a lot of people don'trealize is it's little robots
(16:47):
behind the screen, thosealgorithms that decide whether
or not a show gets seen andpushed out to the masses. Those
little robots look at thingslike comments, reviews, and
subscriptions to decide if thiscontent is worth sharing, if
it's valuable.
That's why your engagementmatters so much. And here's the
(17:07):
best part. It's something thatyou can do right now while I'm
talking. It takes less than tenseconds. It costs you no money
at all.
All you need to do is leave acomment, ask me a question, give
me the stars, or hit subscribe.It really truly makes a massive
difference. And when you do thatlittle thing that you could do
just while you're listening,you're not just helping the show
and me. Thank you, by the way. Ireally appreciate it.
(17:29):
But you are becoming part of ourmission to help parents find the
clarity and confidence they needthat they've been waiting to
hear to bring their kids home.And a bonus is we read every
comment. If you ask a question,there's a good chance that I'll
answer it directly in a futureepisode. So ask away. And
selfishly, I love your commentsbecause it helps me connect with
(17:50):
you and address the topics thatyou care most about.
So thank you in advance, ormaybe you just did it right now
for being the reason another momfinds her way forward. Okay.
Coming up next, I've saved thebest for last. We're gonna dive
into the final point of the day,and I'm starting a new thing
where I'm sharing aninspirational quote of the week.
(18:12):
And I also have a free gift justfor you, so hang tight.
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learningrx.com or click the linkin the show notes. Welcome back.
We are here for the grandfinale.
By the way, I'm so curious whatyou've been thinking throughout
the show. On that Reel I madejust on that Instagram, I had
hundreds of comments. I wannaknow what do you not care about?
What did I miss today? MaybeI'll make a video on it, I'll
(19:17):
tag you.
Wouldn't that be fun? Put in thecomments, we do not care, and
then a colon or something, andthen tell me what you don't care
about. I could use a good laughanyway. Okay. Our final moment
before our quote of the week.
Here is what we do not careabout. We do not care that our
homeschooled kids will not getto experience the same thing as
(19:38):
your public or private schoolkids get to experience. There's
something here that people justreally don't get. You think our
kids are missing out? We thinkyour kids are missing out.
And in my opinion, this isrooted in what we know about how
kids thrive. Psychologists haveshown that children learn best
when they're intrinsicallymotivated, when they're driven
(20:00):
by curiosity, passion, and agenuine desire to explore the
world. But in the compulsoryschool system, so much of that
natural motivation getsundermined by external
pressures, grades, tests, andrigid schedules. We're sad that
your kids don't get the freedomto pursue their unique
interests, to follow theircuriosity wherever it leads, and
(20:22):
to learn for the sheer joy of itwithout the pressures. And it
doesn't mean that we're notrigorous or not giving our kids
a solid education.
My kid's on his fifth year ofLatin for crying out loud. We
know you value that activitiesthat your kids are involved in,
whether it's sports, band,theater, or academic clubs, and
that's great. But please allowus to value different ones. Just
(20:44):
because something is moretypical doesn't mean that it's
better. For us, extracurricularsmight look like spending hours
in the garden to learn aboutbiology, volunteering at a local
shelter to develop empathy andresponsibility, or diving deep
into a creative project thatlights up our kids' imagination.
It might look like hiking amountain on a Tuesday morning,
building a robot in the garage,or learning to bake bread from
(21:07):
scratch. And yes, we do all thetypical ones too, basketball,
scouts, all those other things.But we also like to choose
extracurriculars that align withour family's priorities and our
kids' unique interests, and wehave the freedom and time to do
that for our kids. We're sadthat your kids might not get the
chance to explore these kinds ofexperiences because their
schedules are so packed withactivities that they didn't
(21:30):
really choose or may not evenlove. Now, know this isn't the
case for everybody, but you knowthe point I'm making here.
We're sad that you might not seethe value in the things that we
prioritize for our kids. And I'mnot saying this to judge
anybody. I'm not trying to tellyou how to live your life or
raise your kids. But whileyou're busy judging us for the
way we've chosen to educate andraise our children, we're over
(21:51):
here feeling sorry that yourkids are missing out on so much.
So let's just keep it real.
This isn't about who's right orwrong. It's about appreciating
and giving people the space tohave different needs, different
values, and a different visionfor your kid's future. A friend
of mine once told me a storythat perfectly illustrates how
small minded people can be. Jan,my friend, found out that two
(22:14):
teachers at the local schoolwere gossiping about her family,
specifically her daughter,Emily. The gossip that these two
teachers, they were high schoolteachers, were saying in the
hallway was they were sharinghow sorry they felt for Emily.
They said, oh, if she only wentto the local academy, she could
have been a cheerleader. It'ssuch a shame that her parents
(22:35):
are depriving her of that. Whatthey didn't know was that Emily
was traveling the countrycompeting in horse shows. She
won multiple competitions, wentto the Dixie National every
year, and even competed at theQuarter Horse Congress in Ohio
twice. Later, she and herbrother competed in national
speech and debate tournamentstraveling to places like
(22:56):
California, Florida, andTennessee.
But to those two teachers, Emilywas missing out because she
wasn't a cheerleader. Crazy.It's time now for the quote of
the week. Now some peopleattribute this to CS Lewis, but
it's really foggy the more Iresearch about this quote. So
I'm just gonna say unknown, andhere's the quote.
(23:17):
When the whole world is runningtoward a cliff, he who is
running in the oppositedirection appears to have lost
his mind. This quote is theheartbeat of the we do not care
club homeschool mom chapter.It's a reminder that choosing a
different path, one that alignswith your values, your vision,
and your heart can feel lonelyand even isolating. The world
(23:41):
may look at you and call youcrazy, but what if running in
the opposite direction is thebravest, wisest thing that you
could do? Parenting,homeschooling, and living
authentically often meansstanding firm while others rush
towards what's popular orexpected.
It's not easy to go against thegrain, but it's in those moments
of resistance that we find ourstrength. We're not running
(24:04):
away. We're running towardssomething better, a life of
purpose, intention, and truth.So if you ever feel like the odd
one out, take heart. You're notalone.
Listen to me every week if youhave to. You're part of a
movement of people who dare tolive differently, who dare to
see the cliff for what it is,and choose another way. If this
(24:25):
quote resonated with you, I'dlove to send you completely for
free, a beautifully designednote card featuring it. Perfect
for your mirror, your cardashboard, or anywhere that you
will see it often when you needa little boost. It's my gift to
remind you that you are nothomeschooling solo, and as a
thank you for engaging in theshow, whether it's by liking it,
(24:48):
leaving a review, giving it thestars, only if you think it
deserves it, of course, orcommenting with a statement or a
question, or all of the above.
You'll find the link to downloadthis beautiful ready to print
note card in the show notes.Just print it, cut it out, and
let it encourage you, friend.And if you want me to see it,
tag me on social media. We seeeverything, and we read every
(25:09):
comment. And we want you to knowthat you are part of a community
here in Christy-Faith land.
And because the learning neverstops and we always wanna keep
growing, I am putting in theshow notes three follow-up shows
to listen to if you want somedeeper dives on the topics that
we discussed today. You don'thave to hunt for them. I'm just
gonna put them right in the shownotes. One of them is episode
(25:30):
71, does homeschooling shelteryour kids too much? Episode 66,
the biggest myths abouthomeschool socialization, and
episode 61, are schools killinga love for learning?
Yes. They are, But you need toknow why. Thanks for listening
today. There's a lot more wherethis came from. If you don't
wanna miss an episode, make sureto get on my email list too
(25:51):
because when an episode drops,we email everybody.
I'll see you next week.
Okay, homeschool moms. Let's get real for a
(00:02):
second. Today's episode, it's alittle snarky, it's a little
spicy, and a whole lot of fun.Will I regret it later? Maybe.
But, hey, we're here to live,laugh, and learn. Right? So
here's the scoop. Today, we'retalking about five things
homeschool moms just do not careabout. I decided to do this
episode after I made a videothat popped on social media
(00:25):
where I joked about opening ahomeschool mom's chapter of the
We Do Not Care Club.
I'll link that video in the shownotes so you can see what all
the fuss is about. But you guyscracked me up in the comments
telling me all the things you,as a homeschool mom, do not care
about. Now if you're notfamiliar with the We Do Not Care
(00:45):
Club, let me catch you up. It'sthis brilliant movement started
by this woman named MelanieSanders on TikTok. She's all
about women in perimenopause,menopause, and post menopause
ditching the pressure to careabout things that just don't
matter, like arm fat, matchingsocks, or whether or not yoga
(01:06):
pants will ever actually see theyoga mat.
Her videos are funny. They arefreeing, and it's exactly the
kind of energy we need in thehomeschool world. Because let's
be honest, between lesson plans,chore charts, snack requests,
and the occasional existentialcrisis, we do not have time to
care about what the peanutgallery thinks. Nope. Not today,
(01:28):
Satan.
But here's the twist. This showtoday isn't just about getting a
good laugh. I think the reasonwhy videos like this hit home is
because homeschooling comes witha major mindset shift. Such a
shift that there's even a fancyword for it, deschooling, which
by the way, I do dive into in mybook Homeschool Rising. I have a
(01:49):
little chapter on it.
So grab that laundry, yoursecret chocolate stash that I
know you have, and maybe hide inthe closet for a bit because
let's go over things that we ashomeschool moms just do not have
time to care about. Hello.Welcome to the show. Before we
(02:15):
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(04:05):
Okay. Let's have some fun. Sothe We Do Not Care Club is a
movement about people that tryto tell us what to do or
naysayers about our lifechoices. And so the We Do Not
Care Club is kind of likehomeschool moms clapping back
with the comments that we hearabout things we don't care
about. The first one today, Idid mention in that video, and
(04:27):
this is what I said in thevideo.
I said, we do not care that yourkids go to a good school or a
charter school. It is a school,and we don't want it. Here's the
thing. When we say wehomeschool, some people feel the
need to explain to us why theydon't. Oh, but my kids go to a
really good charter school.
Or, oh, the school we're at isamazing. It has small class
(04:51):
sizes and a STEM program.Listen. That's fine and good for
you, but let's be clear. Thisisn't a comparison.
A school versus homeschool isnot apples to apples. It's not
even apples to oranges. It'sapples to, I don't know, a
completely different planet.Because here's the thing,
homeschooling isn't aboutfinding a better version of
(05:13):
school. It's about rejecting theentire premise of school.
We don't accept school as thedefault option for childhood.
It's about saying we don't needthe bells, the tests, the
grades, or the system. So whilewe're happy for you and your own
choices and your amazing charterschool, We're over here doing
something completely different.We're building an education that
(05:36):
fits our kids, not forcing ourkids to fit into an education.
As John Holt said, what is mostimportant and valuable about the
home as a base for children'sgrowth into the world is not
that it is a better school thanthe schools, but that it isn't a
school at all.
And that's why we don't care howgood your school is. We're not
(05:59):
doing school. The next thingthat we do not care about is
that our kids are weird. Wedon't care that you think our
kids are weird. We love it.
It's kind of the point. Soplease don't come to us with all
of your socialization jargon. Wejust don't care. So let's just
get this out of the way. Canhomeschool kids present
(06:20):
differently?
Yes. Can they be quirky? Arethey unique? And do they not
always fit into the neat littleboxes that society has created
for typical kids? Yes.
But here's the red pill, youguys. Those boxes, they're
suffocating. They're notdesigned to help kids thrive.
They're designed to make kidseasier to manage. They teach
(06:42):
kids that fitting in is moreimportant than being themselves.
Wear the right shoes. Say theright things. Don't stand out.
Don't make waves. Here's thedanger.
When kids are taught eitherexplicitly in school or
implicitly in their socialcircles that the most important
thing is to fit in or else, theylose their courage to be
(07:04):
different, and they start tobelieve that who they are isn't
enough. Sadly, I know many kidsin public schools today that
really have the choice betweenfitting in or social suicide.
Let me know in the comments ifthat was you growing up. We just
had an experience with a kiddoon our football team, and this
(07:24):
was what he was facing. He stoodup for something that was right
at school, chose to not fit inand go with the crowd, and he
got bullied for it for the restof the year.
See, fitting in doesn't buildconfidence. It actually erodes
it. It teaches kids to hidetheir quirks, to silence their
ideas, and to trade authenticityfor approval. And that's not
(07:45):
just sad. That's dangerous.
That's damaging. The worlddoesn't need more people who
know how to blend in. It needspeople who know how to stand
out, to speak up, and tounapologetically be themselves.
And that's what we're doing overhere in homeschool world with
our kids. So when people come atyou with the tired old, but what
(08:06):
about socialization argument orsay that, oh, I can spot a
homeschooler a mile away.
Guess what? I can too, and I canalso spot a public school kid a
mile away. And news flash,that's one of the reasons why we
homeschool. Socialization? Youmean the kind where kids are
crammed into a room with 30other kids their exact same age
(08:28):
and told to sit down, be quiet,conform, and raise your hand if
you need to go to the bathroom?
No. Thanks. Our kids are out inthe real world with us, engaging
with people of all ages,learning how to hold meaningful
conversations, have eye contact,and build relationships based on
who they are, not where theyhappen to live. They're not
(08:49):
confined by artificial bubblesof same age peers, whether they
have the most recent iPhone orthe right shoes. They're free to
connect with others over sharedpassions, not shared ZIP codes.
And that that's realsocialization, the kind that
actually prepares kids for life,not just fitting in to a system.
(09:09):
So, yes, if homeschooling makesour kids weird, I'm here for it.
They're gloriously,unapologetically weird because
what you see as a flaw, I see asa flex. Okay. Okay.
So I need to take a breathbecause when you get me started
on socialization, I will gonuts. By the way, if you need
more on this, I have an entirechapter on socialization in my
(09:32):
book, Homeschool Rising. You canget it on Amazon Prime. Alright.
So I'm just getting warmed up.
Oh, I got more for you. Yes, Ido. And we'll get into it right
after this. As a homeschool momwho values a family together
approach and leans towards theclassical and Charlotte Mason
styles, I often struggle tobring my educational vision to
life with my kids' diverse agesand learning needs. With all our
(09:53):
interests and super packedschedule, bridging that gap
between the dreamy homeschool Iwant and reality, I gotta be
honest.
It's a challenge. Now, yes, Iknow perfection isn't the goal.
But if you're listening and youcould use a little easing of
your mental load in your day today, I found a resource that has
become the quiet hero of ourroutine, and it could be a
really great option for you too.BJU Press homeschool curriculum.
(10:15):
Now many think that BJU Presshomeschool is solely an all in
one option, and though it doesexcel in that role, did you know
you can also opt for specificcourses and tailor them to fit
your family's needs just as Ihave?
BGU Press Homeschool providesthe perfect balance of structure
and flexibility and easilycomplements my family's mixed
age family together on the couchlearning style. They are second
(10:38):
to none in integrating abiblical worldview, stimulating
critical thinking, and offeringtons of hands on activities in
the lessons. To find out how BJUPress Homeschool can come
alongside you in yourhomeschooling goals too. Visit
bjupresshomeschool.com or clickthe link in the show notes.
Before we continue, I wannashare with you a program that's
been a game changer for ourhomeschool.
(10:59):
At our center, we instructed andhelped kids through pretty much
every math program on the marketand know firsthand just how
important a solid mathfoundation is for our kids'
futures. As a career educatorwith high standards, finding the
right program that checked allthe boxes felt like too tall of
an order. Until one day, I triedCTC Math. CTC Math is an online
(11:19):
math curriculum for k to 12students with motivating
interactive lessons that allowkids to learn at their own pace.
It does all the teaching andgrading so you don't have to,
and their adaptive lessonsadjust so your child is
progressing confidently.
With CTC Math, your child isgetting a top notch education,
and you just made yourhomeschool life easier. Visit
ctcmath.com to start your freetrial today or click the link in
(11:41):
the show notes. Welcome back.Here's the third thing that we
do not care about. We do notcare that you think we are
indoctrinating our kids.
Here's the problem with thatargument. You think your
worldview is neutral. It's not.No one's is actually. Not even
mine.
Did you know that the publicschool system has a worldview?
(12:04):
It does. It's secular humanism.So while you're pointing fingers
at us for indoctrinating ourkids, I wanna be very clear. The
public school system is doingthe exact same thing.
The difference, though, is thatI am intellectually honest about
it. Not a single person on thisplanet has a neutral worldview.
We all see the world through ourlens of beliefs, values, and
(12:28):
experiences. And guess what? Weall have to educate our kids,
And the laws of our land, thankgoodness, still give us the
right to raise our children inour faith and according to our
values if we so choose.
And it gives you the same right.So I don't need to apologize
that I'm not outsourcing mykids' worldview to a system that
(12:50):
pretends to be neutral whilepushing its agenda. I'm teaching
my kids to think critically, toquestion everything, including
me, and to build a worldviewthat's rooted in truth, not in
convenience. And I'm certainlynot pushing them to conform.
That's not indoctrination.
That's parenting. I once had acommenter say, well,
homeschooling's okay as long asyou don't make them read the
(13:12):
Bible. And the pride behind thatcomment and the blindness to
their own biases, it was juststartling to me. People really
do think that the public schoolsystem is neutral. It's crazy.
Secular humanism is not neutral.Okay. On to the next. Now I love
this one because this is sodeschool y. Right?
(13:33):
We do not care about educationalstandards. And if you're
listening, you can't see my airquotes right now. This really
gets to people. Oh, the horror.We're not following the state's
standards and their curriculum.
No. We're not. We're notobsessing over standardized
tests. We don't care. Why?
(13:54):
Well, because the educationalstandards are relics of the
industrial revolution. They werenever designed to help kids
thrive. They were designed tocreate factory workers, workers
that would never question thestate, obedient, compliant, and
easy to replace. The more peoplegot to thinking for themselves,
the more inconvenient it was.And the people that created our
(14:16):
industrialized school system,they made no apologies about
this.
But whatever their intentionswere at the time, here's the
problem. That world is gone. Thesystem hasn't really changed,
and it's still preparing kidsfor a life of punching clocks
and following orders, while thereal world today demands
(14:37):
creativity, adaptability,independent thinking, and even
entrepreneurial skills. So we'renot interested in whether our
kids are grade level accordingto some arbitrary chart and know
a bunch of facts and can rattlethem off, which you and I both
know, we just forget it allanyway. What do you remember
from third grade science?
No. We're interested in whetherour kids are learning how to
(14:59):
solve problems, how to think forthemselves, and how to adapt to
a world that's constantlychanging. We're asking
ourselves, do our kids have theskills to thrive later on? And
let's be honest, who evendecides what the standard even
is? Who decides what's worthlearning and what's not?
Because I've seen what passesfor a curriculum these days, and
(15:21):
let's just say it's not exactlyinspiring. Whether or not our
kids are getting a goodeducation or not or are good
kids or good students does notdepend on if they can fill
bubbles in on an answer sheet orwhat grade they get on Friday's
test. We're here to raise kidswho can think, create, and lead.
(15:41):
And to do that, our homeschoolsneed to look a whole heck of a
lot different than theindustrialized school system.
So, no, we don't care about youreducational standards.
We're too busy over herebuilding an education that
actually prepares our kids fortheir future, not a past that no
longer exists. Before we moveon, I wanna pause for a second
and share something with youthat's a bit behind the scenes
(16:03):
and transparent. So if you don'tmind, I'm gonna pull back the
curtain for a second here on theshow. This show, the one you're
listening to right now. Ifyou've been nodding along saying
pop off girl throughout theepisode or wishing your
mother-in-law was hearing this,or you're maybe thinking of a
friend who needs to hear thisbecause she's feeling insecure
in her homeschooling right now,Would you take ten seconds of
(16:24):
your time right now to make acomment, share, subscribe to the
show, or even give me all thosefive stars if I deserve it?
I'm asking directly because thisshow is free to you, and I love
that, and I don't gatekeepanything. But the show is
sponsored. That's how I'm ableto invest so much into you guys.
And what a lot of people don'trealize is it's little robots
(16:47):
behind the screen, thosealgorithms that decide whether
or not a show gets seen andpushed out to the masses. Those
little robots look at thingslike comments, reviews, and
subscriptions to decide if thiscontent is worth sharing, if
it's valuable.
That's why your engagementmatters so much. And here's the
(17:07):
best part. It's something thatyou can do right now while I'm
talking. It takes less than tenseconds. It costs you no money
at all.
All you need to do is leave acomment, ask me a question, give
me the stars, or hit subscribe.It really truly makes a massive
difference. And when you do thatlittle thing that you could do
just while you're listening,you're not just helping the show
and me. Thank you, by the way. Ireally appreciate it.
(17:29):
But you are becoming part of ourmission to help parents find the
clarity and confidence they needthat they've been waiting to
hear to bring their kids home.And a bonus is we read every
comment. If you ask a question,there's a good chance that I'll
answer it directly in a futureepisode. So ask away. And
selfishly, I love your commentsbecause it helps me connect with
(17:50):
you and address the topics thatyou care most about.
So thank you in advance, ormaybe you just did it right now
for being the reason another momfinds her way forward. Okay.
Coming up next, I've saved thebest for last. We're gonna dive
into the final point of the day,and I'm starting a new thing
where I'm sharing aninspirational quote of the week.
(18:12):
And I also have a free gift justfor you, so hang tight.
Is your child struggling withattention, memory, reading,
writing, math? If you'reexperiencing this, you know how
heart wrenching it is to watchthem face these hurdles. You've
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struggle persists, leaving youfeeling stuck and desperately
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(18:33):
LearningRx, a proven programdesigned to help your child's
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LearningRx is backed by thirtyfive years of research, and
their results aretransformative. Use code HOME 50
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(18:57):
learningrx.com or click the linkin the show notes. Welcome back.
We are here for the grandfinale.
By the way, I'm so curious whatyou've been thinking throughout
the show. On that Reel I madejust on that Instagram, I had
hundreds of comments. I wannaknow what do you not care about?
What did I miss today? MaybeI'll make a video on it, I'll
(19:17):
tag you.
Wouldn't that be fun? Put in thecomments, we do not care, and
then a colon or something, andthen tell me what you don't care
about. I could use a good laughanyway. Okay. Our final moment
before our quote of the week.
Here is what we do not careabout. We do not care that our
homeschooled kids will not getto experience the same thing as
(19:38):
your public or private schoolkids get to experience. There's
something here that people justreally don't get. You think our
kids are missing out? We thinkyour kids are missing out.
And in my opinion, this isrooted in what we know about how
kids thrive. Psychologists haveshown that children learn best
when they're intrinsicallymotivated, when they're driven
(20:00):
by curiosity, passion, and agenuine desire to explore the
world. But in the compulsoryschool system, so much of that
natural motivation getsundermined by external
pressures, grades, tests, andrigid schedules. We're sad that
your kids don't get the freedomto pursue their unique
interests, to follow theircuriosity wherever it leads, and
(20:22):
to learn for the sheer joy of itwithout the pressures. And it
doesn't mean that we're notrigorous or not giving our kids
a solid education.
My kid's on his fifth year ofLatin for crying out loud. We
know you value that activitiesthat your kids are involved in,
whether it's sports, band,theater, or academic clubs, and
that's great. But please allowus to value different ones. Just
(20:44):
because something is moretypical doesn't mean that it's
better. For us, extracurricularsmight look like spending hours
in the garden to learn aboutbiology, volunteering at a local
shelter to develop empathy andresponsibility, or diving deep
into a creative project thatlights up our kids' imagination.
It might look like hiking amountain on a Tuesday morning,
building a robot in the garage,or learning to bake bread from
(21:07):
scratch. And yes, we do all thetypical ones too, basketball,
scouts, all those other things.But we also like to choose
extracurriculars that align withour family's priorities and our
kids' unique interests, and wehave the freedom and time to do
that for our kids. We're sadthat your kids might not get the
chance to explore these kinds ofexperiences because their
schedules are so packed withactivities that they didn't
(21:30):
really choose or may not evenlove. Now, know this isn't the
case for everybody, but you knowthe point I'm making here.
We're sad that you might not seethe value in the things that we
prioritize for our kids. And I'mnot saying this to judge
anybody. I'm not trying to tellyou how to live your life or
raise your kids. But whileyou're busy judging us for the
way we've chosen to educate andraise our children, we're over
(21:51):
here feeling sorry that yourkids are missing out on so much.
So let's just keep it real.
This isn't about who's right orwrong. It's about appreciating
and giving people the space tohave different needs, different
values, and a different visionfor your kid's future. A friend
of mine once told me a storythat perfectly illustrates how
small minded people can be. Jan,my friend, found out that two
(22:14):
teachers at the local schoolwere gossiping about her family,
specifically her daughter,Emily. The gossip that these two
teachers, they were high schoolteachers, were saying in the
hallway was they were sharinghow sorry they felt for Emily.
They said, oh, if she only wentto the local academy, she could
have been a cheerleader. It'ssuch a shame that her parents
(22:35):
are depriving her of that. Whatthey didn't know was that Emily
was traveling the countrycompeting in horse shows. She
won multiple competitions, wentto the Dixie National every
year, and even competed at theQuarter Horse Congress in Ohio
twice. Later, she and herbrother competed in national
speech and debate tournamentstraveling to places like
(22:56):
California, Florida, andTennessee.
But to those two teachers, Emilywas missing out because she
wasn't a cheerleader. Crazy.It's time now for the quote of
the week. Now some peopleattribute this to CS Lewis, but
it's really foggy the more Iresearch about this quote. So
I'm just gonna say unknown, andhere's the quote.
(23:17):
When the whole world is runningtoward a cliff, he who is
running in the oppositedirection appears to have lost
his mind. This quote is theheartbeat of the we do not care
club homeschool mom chapter.It's a reminder that choosing a
different path, one that alignswith your values, your vision,
and your heart can feel lonelyand even isolating. The world
(23:41):
may look at you and call youcrazy, but what if running in
the opposite direction is thebravest, wisest thing that you
could do? Parenting,homeschooling, and living
authentically often meansstanding firm while others rush
towards what's popular orexpected.
It's not easy to go against thegrain, but it's in those moments
of resistance that we find ourstrength. We're not running
(24:04):
away. We're running towardssomething better, a life of
purpose, intention, and truth.So if you ever feel like the odd
one out, take heart. You're notalone.
Listen to me every week if youhave to. You're part of a
movement of people who dare tolive differently, who dare to
see the cliff for what it is,and choose another way. If this
(24:25):
quote resonated with you, I'dlove to send you completely for
free, a beautifully designednote card featuring it. Perfect
for your mirror, your cardashboard, or anywhere that you
will see it often when you needa little boost. It's my gift to
remind you that you are nothomeschooling solo, and as a
thank you for engaging in theshow, whether it's by liking it,
(24:48):
leaving a review, giving it thestars, only if you think it
deserves it, of course, orcommenting with a statement or a
question, or all of the above.
You'll find the link to downloadthis beautiful ready to print
note card in the show notes.Just print it, cut it out, and
let it encourage you, friend.And if you want me to see it,
tag me on social media. We seeeverything, and we read every
(25:09):
comment. And we want you to knowthat you are part of a community
here in Christy-Faith land.
And because the learning neverstops and we always wanna keep
growing, I am putting in theshow notes three follow-up shows
to listen to if you want somedeeper dives on the topics that
we discussed today. You don'thave to hunt for them. I'm just
gonna put them right in the shownotes. One of them is episode
(25:30):
71, does homeschooling shelteryour kids too much? Episode 66,
the biggest myths abouthomeschool socialization, and
episode 61, are schools killinga love for learning?
Yes. They are, But you need toknow why. Thanks for listening
today. There's a lot more wherethis came from. If you don't
wanna miss an episode, make sureto get on my email list too
(25:51):
because when an episode drops,we email everybody.
I'll see you next week.
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