March 27, 2024 • 19 mins
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Struggling with the load of life's daily grind is no stranger to the high-flying professionals among us. But what if I told you there's a simple, yet profound strategy to turn that stress into a stepping stone for success? As your coach and confidant, I, Lisa Jeffs, dive into the transformative power of the mantra "who cares" — not as an expression of indifference, but as a beacon of resilience. This episode is all about shaking the weight off your shoulders, envisioning a world where catastrophizing bows down to a life of grace, ease, and excitement for the new day ahead.
Thanks for Listening! We appreciate you. Sending you love and gratitude.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Do you ever feel like things are just harder than
they need to be?
They seem really heavy, seemslike you're carrying a backpack
full of bricks on your back.
Maybe it feels like you'resinking into quicksand.
Well, if so, I want you tostick around, because we're
(00:24):
going to be going through a verysimple strategy to help you
navigate feelings like this, soyou can begin to wake up excited
about your day, excited aboutwhat you're creating, welcoming
in a whole new way of being andthus a whole new level of
(00:44):
results.
Stick around, it's going to bea good one.
Let's get started.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
You're tuning into the Confident, Connected Leader
podcast, your premierdestination for breaking through
your current professionalbarriers.
Your coach and host, Lisa Jeffs, will help you transcend
limitations and achieve newlevels of professional success
beyond self-doubt, sabotage andburnout.
Welcome to the show.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
So the clientele that I work with typically are very
intellectual, they're very smart, they're in their head a lot,
they have a lot of things goingon and when this happens, often
they can live a very intensifiedlife, whereas everything is
(01:40):
just very intense for lack of abetter word and it can become
exhausting after a while.
So there are some clients thatI work with that have a tendency
to catastrophize, and if you'refamiliar with catastrophizing,
(02:01):
this can look like getting amessage or getting a
notification or getting somekind of you know information,
and your brain immediately goesto the worst case scenario and
you can start feeling verystressed out and going into all
(02:23):
these worrisome directions.
I know for myselfcatastrophizing has been a
pattern that I've really had todo some work and healing around,
and you may need support withthis.
Some of these cognitivedistortions are ones that we can
(02:43):
be successful working throughon our own, and sometimes you
need support.
A lot of them are based in pastexperiences, past trauma.
But, needless to say, let's goback to the main topic, which is
what do you do with this?
With this, let's say that youare someone who it's every
(03:13):
little thing that happens, everybump in your business or in
your work environment.
If you get a comment or somefeedback from someone, do you go
into worst case scenario?
Does it feel like your entireworld has blown up?
If you have challenges withyour money or with your
(03:35):
relationships, is it the end ofthe world?
Okay, and if it is, that's okay.
But I'm going to give you astrategy to help you navigate
this and it's going to take somepractice, but once you do it
and get a hang of it, it reallyallows you to lighten up, to
(03:56):
lighten the load and movethrough your world and the world
with so much more grace andease and enjoyment.
So, again, these patterns arevery typical for the type A
right.
If you know, most of my clientsare leaders.
They can be very type A andagain there's this intensified
(04:22):
way of being, that veryintensified way of being that
you know I can laugh about itbecause I've been in it for many
years and I've gone throughwaves where it comes in a little
bit more extreme than othertimes, but being on the other
side of it and it doesn't meanthat I never fall into these
patterns, because I sometimes doHowever, I can navigate out of
(04:45):
it a lot quicker and it's goingto be funny when I tell you the
strategy, but the strategy isyou know when and when something
happens, I want you to adoptthe saying of who cares, who
cares of who cares, who cares?
(05:13):
Oh, this is happening, oh, thisis a problem.
Who cares?
And not in a form of who cares,I don't care, deal with it
yourself.
But in the form of who caresNot a big deal, I'll handle it
or who cares, I'm not even goingto engage with it.
I'm not even going to engage mymind in those worry loops.
(05:34):
I'm not even going to reinforcethe thought patterns that go
into worst case scenarios whocares?
Great, you know, the first timeI heard this, there was someone
talking about debt and they werereally, really worried about
(05:56):
their debt and they wereobsessing about it to the point
where it was front of mind.
And now our society is going totell you that, oh well, that's
not necessarily a bad thing.
Maybe it's a good thing thatyou're, you know, concerned
about it.
However, the laws of theuniverse, when you are focused
(06:20):
on something, it is going toexpand.
When you are worrying aboutsomething, you are sending out
your frequencies and they arepulling back in calling back
that same situation or differentsituations to worry about and
(06:44):
giving some guidance to thisindividual around their debt.
Their path forward was whocares?
Don't even worry about it.
Don't even think about it,because if the debt wasn't there
, you wouldn't be thinking aboutit because it wouldn't be there
(07:07):
Now.
That doesn't mean ignore it anddon't pay your bills and don't
have the intention of becomingfinancially free, but we don't
want to give it the energy andthe worry and the stress which
is very much a pattern ofcollective consciousness In my
(07:32):
life.
I am very secluded in the senseof the people that I surround
myself with and haveconversations with on a regular
basis do not speak of worry andwhat they're stressed about and
(07:53):
they don't complain.
Now, this isn't to say thatthey don't express their
feelings and their emotions, butit is not a complain worry fest
and it's not to say that if youfind yourself complaining a lot
and worrying a lot, thatthere's anything wrong with you.
(08:15):
Most likely you've fallen intoa habit and a way of being.
And if you're around themajority of people in this in
North America, then you're goingto be listening and accustomed
to a lot of complaining and alot of people in this in North
America, then you're going to belistening and accustomed to a
lot of complaining and a lot ofpeople having these
conversations, because it justis within the collective.
(08:38):
You know, when I look back andwhen I get a Facebook memory
from 10, 15 years ago maybe not10 years ago, like 15 years ago
I am shocked.
I'm like wow, and I reallyconsidered myself to be a pretty
positive person and I was apretty positive person, but I
still would have this thread ofcomplaining and focus on the
(09:05):
things that I didn't like orthat were going wrong.
And I want you just to look at,take the emotion out of it and
just simply see it as energy.
Where's my energy going?
Where's my focus going?
Is my focus on all the thingsthat I'm scared about?
(09:26):
Is my focus on worrying aboutall the things that could go
wrong?
Who cares?
Who cares about all thosethings?
You will deal with it.
If it happens, you can navigatechallenges.
Majority of the things thatyou're worrying about are not
going to happen and if they dohappen, you'll deal with it and
it won't be that big of a deal.
The most challenging thing isliving day to day in fear and
(09:53):
worry and what ifs and what ifthis goes wrong?
And what if I put this out andsomeone judges me?
And what if I say no, and thesepeople don't like me or think
I'm a bitch or a whatever.
That is the hardest thing tonavigate.
It's heavy, it feels like abackpack full of bricks and you
(10:18):
don't really notice it untilyou're out of it.
You don't really notice thatway of being until you're on the
other side and then you're likeuntil you're on the other side
and then you're like wow, howwas I dealing with that?
Every day, you know, when I goout and I have certain
conversations with peopleoutside of, you know the bubble
(10:49):
that I've cultivated.
Sometimes it's shocking andit's shocking to see what we've
created as a society as beingnormal, like a normal way of
being, a normal way of seeingthe world's.
(11:12):
No, I'm careful with usingthose words, because it's not
about a hierarchy and it'sreally not about being righteous
.
It's seeing the world in asense of.
I don't believe that we need to.
This is my beliefs.
I don't believe that we need towork hard to become something,
(11:37):
to become this amazing person,to become successful, to become
all these things.
I believe we already are.
We are already whole.
We are already full.
We are already more incredibleand just almost not almost we
are mind-blowing.
(11:58):
If we really look at what ahuman being is Absolutely
mind-blowing.
Absolutely mind-blowing how ourbody functions the way it does.
Mind-blowing how our bodyfunctions the way it does, the
things that our mind can come upwith, our imagination can come
(12:23):
up with.
It is absolutely mind-blowingwhat to worry about and how to
be careful and how to protectyourself, because the world is a
scary, scary place, which it'snot and I don't believe it is,
but this can be a belief systemthat's instilled in us from a
very young age.
So I want you to practice this.
(12:43):
When something happens, whenyou get a message or
notification or something thattypically would send you down
into a spiral and a black holeand worrying and thinking and
all these things, I want youjust to say who cares, who cares
(13:06):
Big deal, I'll deal with it.
Or just say who cares and moveforward.
Move on, focusing in on whatyou're creating, what you want
to do, what you're calling inyour vision.
This is why having a vision isso, so important, and it's one
(13:29):
of the most resisted things whenI'm working with clients
one-on-one, crafting a vision,and the vision doesn't have to
be super specific.
It can be, it doesn't have tobe.
But even in a broad sense of avision, people will resist it.
But it is so powerful to have avision to pull you forward, to
(13:55):
be your North Star, to allow youto see and allow you to craft
that next level version ofyourself.
And the sooner that you canfully embody that next level
version of yourself, that visionwill come into the physical,
(14:17):
that vision will manifest.
But if your focus and yourthoughts are constantly going to
worry or distraction or all thethings that could go wrong,
then you're just creating moreof that and it's exhausting.
It's absolutely exhausting andit doesn't need to be this way.
(14:40):
It doesn't need to be this way.
If you are resonant with mycontent, then I already know
that you're brilliant.
I already know that you have abrilliant, brilliant mind.
You're very smart, you're verycreative and all that energy
you're putting towards thesethings that you don't want, you
(15:02):
can be directing them to whatyou do want.
Imagine how much faster thingsare going to start appearing in
your life, things that you want.
All the magic, all the magic.
I'm going to wrap this up withone last story.
This was a time period rightafter my father passed away.
(15:23):
It was about a year, I wouldsay.
I remember being on the subwayand it was about a year to the
date that he passed and I couldfeel the energy.
I could feel his energy.
It was very visceral in my bodyand it was a message of your
grieving has ended not that itever ends fully, but the deep
(15:49):
grief I was in was ending and itwas time to move forward.
It was time to move forward andstart my life and for about a
year after that, I was veryfocused on gratitude,
maintaining a thought pattern ofexcitement and anticipation for
(16:13):
what I was creating.
And that year was the firsttime I experienced
synchronicities on Supercharge.
I mean, there was so manythings flowing into my life.
I can't even tell you how manycontests I won.
I remember winning this contestin the newspaper, so I'm aging
(16:34):
myself a bit, but yes, it was ina newspaper and I won this
contest, this first placecontest.
I remember we got hotel ticketsand dinner tickets and all
these things.
It was for a Mother's Daycontest and I had never won
anything before and it wouldjust created this ripple effect.
(16:59):
Now, mind you, I did fall into adarker place after that year.
I didn't maintain that energy,but that again shows you what
you focus on is going to expand.
So this is really a message topractice the consistency of
(17:20):
focusing on what you desire andallowing this momentum of things
just getting better and betterto happen and really not
engaging in the thought patternsthat you don't want to grow,
because what you focus on isgoing to grow, it's going to
(17:41):
expand.
So focus in on what you arecalling into your life all the
wonder, all the joy, and whocares about the other stuff?
You'll deal with it.
You'll handle it.
It can be a lot easier thanyour brain wants to make it out
to be.
I hope this was helpful.
If you're still with me, Ihonor you.
(18:02):
I appreciate you.
Thank you for your time.
I hope this was of value.
Shoot me a DM.
I love getting messages.
If you have questions that youwant me to answer, shoot me a DM
.
Send me an email at info atlisajeffscom.
I'd love to answer yourquestion on a podcast.
(18:22):
As always, I honor you andlet's stay connected.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
Thank you for tuning into the Confident, Connected
Leader podcast.
Lisa Jeffs is committed tohelping you break through
barriers and climb to newprofessional heights.
If today's episode inspired you, we'd be honored if you could
subscribe, rate and leave areview To stay updated with
practical tips and insights,follow us on LinkedIn, Instagram
(18:52):
or Facebook.
You'll find all relevant links,including those for our
complimentary gifts andtrainings, in the show notes.
Until our next episode, embraceyour confidence and stay
connected.
Do you ever feel like things are just harder than
they need to be?
They seem really heavy, seemslike you're carrying a backpack
full of bricks on your back.
Maybe it feels like you'resinking into quicksand.
Well, if so, I want you tostick around, because we're
(00:24):
going to be going through a verysimple strategy to help you
navigate feelings like this, soyou can begin to wake up excited
about your day, excited aboutwhat you're creating, welcoming
in a whole new way of being andthus a whole new level of
(00:44):
results.
Stick around, it's going to bea good one.
Let's get started.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
You're tuning into the Confident, Connected Leader
podcast, your premierdestination for breaking through
your current professionalbarriers.
Your coach and host, Lisa Jeffs, will help you transcend
limitations and achieve newlevels of professional success
beyond self-doubt, sabotage andburnout.
Welcome to the show.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
So the clientele that I work with typically are very
intellectual, they're very smart, they're in their head a lot,
they have a lot of things goingon and when this happens, often
they can live a very intensifiedlife, whereas everything is
(01:40):
just very intense for lack of abetter word and it can become
exhausting after a while.
So there are some clients thatI work with that have a tendency
to catastrophize, and if you'refamiliar with catastrophizing,
(02:01):
this can look like getting amessage or getting a
notification or getting somekind of you know information,
and your brain immediately goesto the worst case scenario and
you can start feeling verystressed out and going into all
(02:23):
these worrisome directions.
I know for myselfcatastrophizing has been a
pattern that I've really had todo some work and healing around,
and you may need support withthis.
Some of these cognitivedistortions are ones that we can
(02:43):
be successful working throughon our own, and sometimes you
need support.
A lot of them are based in pastexperiences, past trauma.
But, needless to say, let's goback to the main topic, which is
what do you do with this?
With this, let's say that youare someone who it's every
(03:13):
little thing that happens, everybump in your business or in
your work environment.
If you get a comment or somefeedback from someone, do you go
into worst case scenario?
Does it feel like your entireworld has blown up?
If you have challenges withyour money or with your
(03:35):
relationships, is it the end ofthe world?
Okay, and if it is, that's okay.
But I'm going to give you astrategy to help you navigate
this and it's going to take somepractice, but once you do it
and get a hang of it, it reallyallows you to lighten up, to
(03:56):
lighten the load and movethrough your world and the world
with so much more grace andease and enjoyment.
So, again, these patterns arevery typical for the type A
right.
If you know, most of my clientsare leaders.
They can be very type A andagain there's this intensified
(04:22):
way of being, that veryintensified way of being that
you know I can laugh about itbecause I've been in it for many
years and I've gone throughwaves where it comes in a little
bit more extreme than othertimes, but being on the other
side of it and it doesn't meanthat I never fall into these
patterns, because I sometimes doHowever, I can navigate out of
(04:45):
it a lot quicker and it's goingto be funny when I tell you the
strategy, but the strategy isyou know when and when something
happens, I want you to adoptthe saying of who cares, who
cares of who cares, who cares?
(05:13):
Oh, this is happening, oh, thisis a problem.
Who cares?
And not in a form of who cares,I don't care, deal with it
yourself.
But in the form of who caresNot a big deal, I'll handle it
or who cares, I'm not even goingto engage with it.
I'm not even going to engage mymind in those worry loops.
(05:34):
I'm not even going to reinforcethe thought patterns that go
into worst case scenarios whocares?
Great, you know, the first timeI heard this, there was someone
talking about debt and they werereally, really worried about
(05:56):
their debt and they wereobsessing about it to the point
where it was front of mind.
And now our society is going totell you that, oh well, that's
not necessarily a bad thing.
Maybe it's a good thing thatyou're, you know, concerned
about it.
However, the laws of theuniverse, when you are focused
(06:20):
on something, it is going toexpand.
When you are worrying aboutsomething, you are sending out
your frequencies and they arepulling back in calling back
that same situation or differentsituations to worry about and
(06:44):
giving some guidance to thisindividual around their debt.
Their path forward was whocares?
Don't even worry about it.
Don't even think about it,because if the debt wasn't there
, you wouldn't be thinking aboutit because it wouldn't be there
(07:07):
Now.
That doesn't mean ignore it anddon't pay your bills and don't
have the intention of becomingfinancially free, but we don't
want to give it the energy andthe worry and the stress which
is very much a pattern ofcollective consciousness In my
(07:32):
life.
I am very secluded in the senseof the people that I surround
myself with and haveconversations with on a regular
basis do not speak of worry andwhat they're stressed about and
(07:53):
they don't complain.
Now, this isn't to say thatthey don't express their
feelings and their emotions, butit is not a complain worry fest
and it's not to say that if youfind yourself complaining a lot
and worrying a lot, thatthere's anything wrong with you.
(08:15):
Most likely you've fallen intoa habit and a way of being.
And if you're around themajority of people in this in
North America, then you're goingto be listening and accustomed
to a lot of complaining and alot of people in this in North
America, then you're going to belistening and accustomed to a
lot of complaining and a lot ofpeople having these
conversations, because it justis within the collective.
(08:38):
You know, when I look back andwhen I get a Facebook memory
from 10, 15 years ago maybe not10 years ago, like 15 years ago
I am shocked.
I'm like wow, and I reallyconsidered myself to be a pretty
positive person and I was apretty positive person, but I
still would have this thread ofcomplaining and focus on the
(09:05):
things that I didn't like orthat were going wrong.
And I want you just to look at,take the emotion out of it and
just simply see it as energy.
Where's my energy going?
Where's my focus going?
Is my focus on all the thingsthat I'm scared about?
(09:26):
Is my focus on worrying aboutall the things that could go
wrong?
Who cares?
Who cares about all thosethings?
You will deal with it.
If it happens, you can navigatechallenges.
Majority of the things thatyou're worrying about are not
going to happen and if they dohappen, you'll deal with it and
it won't be that big of a deal.
The most challenging thing isliving day to day in fear and
(09:53):
worry and what ifs and what ifthis goes wrong?
And what if I put this out andsomeone judges me?
And what if I say no, and thesepeople don't like me or think
I'm a bitch or a whatever.
That is the hardest thing tonavigate.
It's heavy, it feels like abackpack full of bricks and you
(10:18):
don't really notice it untilyou're out of it.
You don't really notice thatway of being until you're on the
other side and then you're likeuntil you're on the other side
and then you're like wow, howwas I dealing with that?
Every day, you know, when I goout and I have certain
conversations with peopleoutside of, you know the bubble
(10:49):
that I've cultivated.
Sometimes it's shocking andit's shocking to see what we've
created as a society as beingnormal, like a normal way of
being, a normal way of seeingthe world's.
(11:12):
No, I'm careful with usingthose words, because it's not
about a hierarchy and it'sreally not about being righteous
.
It's seeing the world in asense of.
I don't believe that we need to.
This is my beliefs.
I don't believe that we need towork hard to become something,
(11:37):
to become this amazing person,to become successful, to become
all these things.
I believe we already are.
We are already whole.
We are already full.
We are already more incredibleand just almost not almost we
are mind-blowing.
(11:58):
If we really look at what ahuman being is Absolutely
mind-blowing.
Absolutely mind-blowing how ourbody functions the way it does.
Mind-blowing how our bodyfunctions the way it does, the
things that our mind can come upwith, our imagination can come
(12:23):
up with.
It is absolutely mind-blowingwhat to worry about and how to
be careful and how to protectyourself, because the world is a
scary, scary place, which it'snot and I don't believe it is,
but this can be a belief systemthat's instilled in us from a
very young age.
So I want you to practice this.
(12:43):
When something happens, whenyou get a message or
notification or something thattypically would send you down
into a spiral and a black holeand worrying and thinking and
all these things, I want youjust to say who cares, who cares
(13:06):
Big deal, I'll deal with it.
Or just say who cares and moveforward.
Move on, focusing in on whatyou're creating, what you want
to do, what you're calling inyour vision.
This is why having a vision isso, so important, and it's one
(13:29):
of the most resisted things whenI'm working with clients
one-on-one, crafting a vision,and the vision doesn't have to
be super specific.
It can be, it doesn't have tobe.
But even in a broad sense of avision, people will resist it.
But it is so powerful to have avision to pull you forward, to
(13:55):
be your North Star, to allow youto see and allow you to craft
that next level version ofyourself.
And the sooner that you canfully embody that next level
version of yourself, that visionwill come into the physical,
(14:17):
that vision will manifest.
But if your focus and yourthoughts are constantly going to
worry or distraction or all thethings that could go wrong,
then you're just creating moreof that and it's exhausting.
It's absolutely exhausting andit doesn't need to be this way.
(14:40):
It doesn't need to be this way.
If you are resonant with mycontent, then I already know
that you're brilliant.
I already know that you have abrilliant, brilliant mind.
You're very smart, you're verycreative and all that energy
you're putting towards thesethings that you don't want, you
(15:02):
can be directing them to whatyou do want.
Imagine how much faster thingsare going to start appearing in
your life, things that you want.
All the magic, all the magic.
I'm going to wrap this up withone last story.
This was a time period rightafter my father passed away.
(15:23):
It was about a year, I wouldsay.
I remember being on the subwayand it was about a year to the
date that he passed and I couldfeel the energy.
I could feel his energy.
It was very visceral in my bodyand it was a message of your
grieving has ended not that itever ends fully, but the deep
(15:49):
grief I was in was ending and itwas time to move forward.
It was time to move forward andstart my life and for about a
year after that, I was veryfocused on gratitude,
maintaining a thought pattern ofexcitement and anticipation for
(16:13):
what I was creating.
And that year was the firsttime I experienced
synchronicities on Supercharge.
I mean, there was so manythings flowing into my life.
I can't even tell you how manycontests I won.
I remember winning this contestin the newspaper, so I'm aging
(16:34):
myself a bit, but yes, it was ina newspaper and I won this
contest, this first placecontest.
I remember we got hotel ticketsand dinner tickets and all
these things.
It was for a Mother's Daycontest and I had never won
anything before and it wouldjust created this ripple effect.
(16:59):
Now, mind you, I did fall into adarker place after that year.
I didn't maintain that energy,but that again shows you what
you focus on is going to expand.
So this is really a message topractice the consistency of
(17:20):
focusing on what you desire andallowing this momentum of things
just getting better and betterto happen and really not
engaging in the thought patternsthat you don't want to grow,
because what you focus on isgoing to grow, it's going to
(17:41):
expand.
So focus in on what you arecalling into your life all the
wonder, all the joy, and whocares about the other stuff?
You'll deal with it.
You'll handle it.
It can be a lot easier thanyour brain wants to make it out
to be.
I hope this was helpful.
If you're still with me, Ihonor you.
(18:02):
I appreciate you.
Thank you for your time.
I hope this was of value.
Shoot me a DM.
I love getting messages.
If you have questions that youwant me to answer, shoot me a DM
.
Send me an email at info atlisajeffscom.
I'd love to answer yourquestion on a podcast.
(18:22):
As always, I honor you andlet's stay connected.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
Thank you for tuning into the Confident, Connected
Leader podcast.
Lisa Jeffs is committed tohelping you break through
barriers and climb to newprofessional heights.
If today's episode inspired you, we'd be honored if you could
subscribe, rate and leave areview To stay updated with
practical tips and insights,follow us on LinkedIn, Instagram
(18:52):
or Facebook.
You'll find all relevant links,including those for our
complimentary gifts andtrainings, in the show notes.
Until our next episode, embraceyour confidence and stay
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