"Are We Just Roommates?” How to Know If It’s Time to Stay or Go

Feel like you're co-parenting with a stranger? You’re not alone—and this episode is your lifeline back to clarity, connection, and choice.

In this deeply validating conversation, licensed therapist Emily Zeller joins Erica to unpack the “roommate phase” of marriage—when love fades, resentment simmers, and the passion feels long gone.

Together, they explore what it means to feel emotionally disconnected, how to identify this slow breakdown before it becomes irreversible, and most importantly—what to do about it.

Whether you’re wondering if it’s time for couples therapy or already Googling divorce attorneys in the middle of the night, this episode offers the tools, truths, and tough love to help you move from stuck to self-honoring.

You’ll walk away with the language to name what’s really going on and the reminder that you’re allowed to choose you—no matter how long it’s been.

🔑 Key Themes & Takeaways:

• What the “roommate phase” really means (and how it sneaks up on you)

• Signs your marriage is running on autopilot—and how to interrupt the pattern

• Why resentment builds in silence, and how to name disconnection without blame

• Practical tips to reconnect, reestablish intimacy, or make a conscious exit

• The importance of doing your own emotional inventory first

• Why couples wait too long for therapy—and what to do instead

• The difference between temporary disconnection and long-term misalignment

• What to do if your partner doesn’t think there’s a problem

• How to stop outsourcing your happiness and rediscover yourself again

  
  

#RoommatePhase #MarriageAdvice #RelationshipBurnout #CouplesTherapy #DivorceSupport #CrazyExWifesClub #EmilyZeller #WomensEmpowerment #HealingFromResentment #MarriageWithoutConnection #SelfRediscovery #EmotionalHealing #ShouldIStayOrGo #ReconnectingInMarriage

We talk about:

• 00:00 Introduction

• 02:04 Understanding the Roommate Phase

• 07:23 Steps to Reconnect and Rebuild

• 13:46 Personal Reflections and Overcoming Challenges

• 17:09 Maintaining Individuality in Relationships

• 22:39 Understanding Relationship Dynamics

• 23:09 Addressing Anxiety and Vulnerability

• 24:06 Building Trust and Communication

• 24:26 Dealing with Past Wounds

• 28:49 Navigating the Roommate Phase

• 31:45 Self-Reflection and Personal Growth

• 36:47 Appreciation and Gratitude

• 39:03 Conclusion and Resources

  
  

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Learn More About This Week’s Guest: Emily Zeller

Emily Zeller is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over a decade of experience helping moms navigate anxiety, supporting disconnected couples, and guiding families toward healing.

Emily is intensively trained in Child-Parent Psychotherapy (CPP), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and is a certified Enneagram consultant.

She is the founder of Zeller & Co. Therapy, a modern virtual practice known for its thoughtful, evidence-based approach to therapy intensives and individualized care. Emily’s mission is to help her clients feel more connected—to themselves, their loved ones, and the life they’re creating.

Connect with Emily

• Website: www.zellertherapy.com 

• Instagram: www.instagram.com/iamemilyzeller 

• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/zellerandcotherapy

• Download Emily’s Free Guide to understanding your personality

  
  

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