93. Stop Waiting for Lightning: Building Clarity Through Imperfect Action

Clarity feels like that elusive treasure we're all searching for – the magical moment when everything falls into place and our purpose becomes crystal clear. But what if everything you've believed about finding clarity is actually holding you back?

This episode dismantles the harmful myth that clarity is something you stumble upon like a hidden treasure. Instead, I share the liberating truth that clarity is something you actively build through brave, imperfect action. You'll discover why waiting for that lightning bolt moment of certainty keeps you stuck, and how the comfort zone you're hesitant to leave is actually where your dreams go to die.

The real transformation happens when you understand that clarity isn't the precursor to action – it's the result of it. Every step forward, even the messy ones that feel like mistakes, provides valuable data points that guide you closer to where you're meant to be. As I share from my own journey of building a coaching business, those "wrong turns" aren't failures – they're filtering mechanisms that refine your path.

You'll learn the crucial difference between measuring outcomes versus measuring energy, and why your internal compass has been there all along. Rather than waiting for perfect certainty, I challenge you to choose one thing you're curious about and take one imperfect action toward it this week. Because success isn't built through perfect choices – it's built by making enough brave choices that you eventually land exactly where you're meant to be.

Ready to stop waiting and start building the clarity you've been searching for? Listen now, and discover how even one tiny brave move can start creating the aligned life that feels like home.

Thanks for listening!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:14):
Hey everyone, welcome back to the Create your Day
podcast.
I'm your host, jen Cody, andthis is episode 93.
I'm so glad you're here.
Welcome.
If this is your first time here, my name is Jen, I am your
coach, I'm your truth tellerOccasionally some sarcasm,
definitely a hype womanbasically just your good friend

(00:36):
here to hand out some truth toyou, but in a very caring way.
So it may sting a little bit tohear some of the things we're
dishing out, but it's all in thename of self-development,
making yourself better, andreally my goal is to hand you
the blueprint that you'relooking for so you can build the
life that you want, to wake upto every day and stop kind of

(00:59):
spinning your wheels saying whatthe hell am I doing here and
what's my purpose?
Where do I go from here?
So today, what we're talkingabout is clarity.
Clarity is not something youfind, and that is something that
a lot of people don't believe.
Clarity is not hiding in thatyoga class, right?

(01:21):
It's not tucked away inside thenext self-help book that you're
going to pick up or the onethat you've been meaning to
finish all these years.
Clarity is actually somethingthat you build brick by brick,
piece by piece, messy, step bymessy step, so it's a little
chaotic, but you're not doing itwrong and the reason that you

(01:42):
think you are is that you'vebeen sold a lie.
Essentially, somewhere betweenyou can be anything you want to
be and go follow your passion.
We've all gotten stuck believingthat clarity is something
that's going to hit us acrossthe face like a two by four.
We're going to be struck bylightning at some point and
there's the clarity.

(02:02):
Like have you ever thought toyourself or heard someone say
you know, you'll just know, likeit's magic.
But it actually doesn't workthat way.
And so many people think thatthey're doing something wrong
when they're waiting for theclarity to hit and nothing's
happening.
But I'm here to tell you todaythat waiting for that clarity to

(02:24):
hit that way is essentially thesame thing as waiting for, like
, a winning lottery ticket toland in your lap.
Yes, is it possible?
Sure, but is it actually goingto happen in real life?
No, probably not.
You're going to sit there,you're going to get older,
you're going to get morefrustrated and you're going to
keep calling it work.
Right, you're working onyourself, but it never actually

(02:48):
happens.
So if you are waiting to feel100% sure, before you move
forward on something, you'reconfusing clarity with comfort.
Comfort is where your dreams goto die.
Not to be dramatic, but it'strue, comfort is not good.

(03:10):
Comfort is where you sit, still, when you are comfortable.
Do you want to move?
No, that's the same thing aswhen you're sitting in the same
place waiting to feel somethingas the sign for you to move
forward.
It doesn't work that way.
So let's call it like it isClarity is a result.
Clarity is the side effect ofbeing brave.

(03:33):
Clarity is the side effect ofbeing courageous, not being
cautious.
Not extra planning, definitelynot waiting until Mercury is not
in retrograde and all the starsare aligned.
You don't think your way intoclarity, you live your way into
it.
Please write that down.

(03:53):
You will never think your wayto clarity, you have to live it.
Clarity only happens when youactually take action and do
those things that scare you.
When you take the class thatmaybe you're nervous about.
When you send out the emailthat you keep saying should I or
shouldn't I?
When you apply for the job thatyou think you're underqualified

(04:16):
for, or when you say no, whenyou're so used to saying yes.
These are the moments whereclarity is born to saying yes.
These are the moments whereclarity is born.
And think about what we justsaid.
Every single one of those isuncomfortable.
Clarity is never going to comeif you are comfortable.
Do you hear that?
I know it's painful, becausecomfortable is nice, comfortable

(04:41):
is comfortable is nice.
Comfortable is comfortable.
We want to stay there, but thatis not where the magic happens.
So you don't need to knowbefore you move forward.
What you need to do is find outbefore you move forward.
So think of it like this you arenot a GPS navigating your way

(05:02):
to a perfectly markeddestination, right?
But we're also not going tojust build the road as we drive.
What we need to do you've heardme say this about, like,
getting in the car.
And if you just get in andstart driving without there
being a set destination, thatdoesn't work.
So even if you don't knowexactly, you don't have clarity,
you have to at least get in andstart the car and start

(05:25):
thinking about it.
Right?
You can't just sit in the house, because then you'll definitely
never get there.
So if you think of clarity asthat moment where you take the
leap and you leave the house andyou get in the car, that's
where the clarity is going tostart to come in.
So maybe I've done you adisservice talking about that
GPS, right?

(05:46):
Because I've said it so manytimes, if you get in the car and
you don't know where you'regoing, you're never going to get
there.
So have you been holding on tothat, waiting for the clarity
around where you're going?
You have to get in the car, youhave to make a move.
So that's one thing that isdefinitely going to propel you

(06:06):
forward and at least start theprocess of you finding clarity.
And some of you may be feelingstuck right, and I promise that
is not your fault If you'refeeling stuck right now.
Here's the deal You're not lazy, you're not broken.
Here's the deal You're not lazy, you're not broken.

(06:29):
You are living in a culturethat taught you that movement
only counts when it's perfect.
You're living in a society thathas led you to believe that
action only counts when it'sflawless.
And that is just not true,because guess what?
Perfection doesn't exist.
It's a myth.
It was invented by people whowere too scared to actually do

(06:51):
the damn thing themselves.
And the rest of us are out herewaiting for that perfection to
show up, and it never will.
You are not here to get itright.
You are here to get it moving.
To get it right, you are hereto get it moving.
Only once you start moving willyou be able to make any

(07:11):
progress towards getting itright.
So what happens when you do getstuck?
Feeling stuck does not meanyou're off track.
It just means that you haven'tnecessarily left the right
starting line right, like maybeyou forgot.
You forgot that you're supposedto start before you're ready.
So you're just kind of likesitting there feeling stuck and
not knowing what's going on.

(07:32):
So I want to paint you thispicture Building clarity.
Looks like taking a stepforward and then immediately
wondering oh shit, did I juststep in like a giant pile of dog
dew, or did I just step in agiant puddle of mud?
Like what did I just do?

(07:52):
That's what clarity looks like.
It looks like saying yes tosomething and then going oh no,
what the hell did I just do?
Why did I do that?
I'm never doing it again.
It looks like taking that newjob, realizing you hate it but
still being proud that you tookthe chance to do it.
It means launching a businessidea, and maybe it's the wrong

(08:13):
one, but it's leading you to thepoint where you are going to
land on the right one, you'renot failing.
So I want you to think of itthis way when you are in those
moments where you're stuck andyou feel like you did step in a
big, giant pile of dog dew rightand you're standing there and

(08:33):
you're wondering what the hellam I supposed to do now, I guess
I did the wrong thing.
And so many of us in thatmoment stand still and and I
need you to reframe that rightthis minute Because when you
stand still at that point, itsets you back so far you start
to second guess whether or notyou can make decisions, because
you feel like the one you justmade was not accurate.

(08:56):
So how can you trust yourselfto move forward?
This is how you're going toreframe that.
This is not failing.
It's filtering.
Treat every single action as adata point.
Every single action you take isteaching you something.
It's giving you information.

(09:16):
When we can take every movethat we've made and learn from
it and actually use it to helpus learn something new, move us
forward.
Every single misstep becomesintelligence for us to collect
and analyze and utilize so thatwe can avoid doing the same
thing in the future.
So remember that you are notfailing, you are filtering.

(09:40):
That's going to be a hugereframe and it absolutely is
going to help you to moveforward.
Those times that you feel likeyou just did the wrong thing,
don't let those moments make youstand still.
Let them propel you forward.
Look at that moment like, oh mygoodness, this is such a good
thing.
I've been able to filter outwhat I did wrong and now I know

(10:01):
how to move forward next time.
So that's the way you want tolook at those situations,
because every single wrong turnis actually bringing you closer
to the right destination.
But how can that happen ifyou're standing still?
Right, don't you have to bemoving in order to move closer
to the destination, even whenthe turns are wrong?

(10:23):
So if you make a wrong turn andmove a little bit further away,
there's no way to get closer bystanding still.
You still have to keep moving.
So how can you actually startbuilding some clarity this week?
Because, remember, we'rebuilding it.
We're not finding it, we'rebuilding it.
So we're going to have somehomework this week.

(10:45):
Listening is great.
Action is where magic lives.
So I want you to pick one thingthat you're curious about.
This does not have to be yourforever thing.
This does not have to be themake it or break it thing.
This does not have to be.
If this fails, I'm done.
I'm a goner.
I'm never doing anything again.
Pick one thing, one tiny thingthat you are curious about, and

(11:10):
this week I want you to take oneimperfect action towards it.
Send that email, take the class, ask the question, go to the
dinner, do the thing that youare afraid to do, book the call.
Whatever is going to move youcloser?
And I'm going to give you asecret.
We're talking about clarityhere, right, and I said before

(11:33):
that clarity comes from momentsof bravery.
Clarity comes from moments ofbeing courageous, stepping out
of your comfort zone, all of thethings we're talking about
doing.
They require you to be bold,they require you to be brave,
and that is where you find yourbalance.
Balance is found in the bold,brave moves that you're taking.

(11:57):
So you want to measure yourenergy when you do this right.
You're not measuring youroutcome.
It's not about whether or notit worked.
It's not about did I get theresult I was going for After you
take these imperfect actions?
So let's say it's a class rightIf you really want to take a
class that you've never takenbefore a yoga class, a workout

(12:18):
class, a business class, aspeaking, a public speaking
class, anything, if you reallyhave been wanting to do that and
you've never done it before.
Once you do it, what if you hateit?
Does that mean you failed?
Does that mean you did thewrong thing?
Of course not.
But if you measure the outcome,that's what it's going to make

(12:40):
you feel.
You're going to feel like, oh,I never should have done that.
That was silly.
I can't trust myself to makedecisions.
I'm going to sit still in mycomfortable place.
Instead, we're going to measureyour energy After you take
action.
Ask yourself did this make mefeel more alive and did it make
me feel proud, even if itflopped?

(13:01):
Those are the things you wantto follow, because energy, I'm
going to tell you right nowenergy is your compass.
It always has been.
You're looking outside ofyourself for direction.
You're looking outside ofyourself to see when am I going
to be sure of the move I have tomake?
Follow the energy.
I promise you you will notregret it.

(13:23):
You will not regret it becausesuccess, your success, your
fulfillment, your happiness itis not built by making perfect
choices.
It is built by making enoughbrave choices that you finally
land where you're meant to be.
I want to talk to you guys aboutmy journey right.
Like I am so happy with what Iget to do every day, I feel

(13:44):
super blessed that I get to wakeup every day.
I speak to people all day longand I help them realize their
dreams.
I help them realize the lifethat they want to live, the
business that they want to run.
I help them really just beconfident in who they are.
It is a true blessing.
It is something that I haveloved doing for many, many years

(14:06):
.
But did it always look like this?
Did it always look like what Igot to do every time I woke up
in the morning?
Of course not.
It took years and years ofmaking wrong choices, of going
in the wrong direction and usingthose data points to figure out
where I had to pivot.
It took years of me reachingout to people and getting the no

(14:30):
right, but I never would havegotten any answer at all if I
wasn't making the calls, sendingthe emails, asking people if I
can help them.
And by asking people if I couldhelp them, I was able to see who
said yes, who said no.
Well, once I those are all datapoints I get to see oh, these
people all said yes.

(14:51):
They must be my people.
What do they have in common?
Oh, they're all women.
They're all women who are superhigh driven.
They're all women who are supermotivated, but just are lacking
a little bit of confidence.
They're lacking a little bit ofdirection and strategy.
Oh, I can help them with that.
Who are the people that said no?
These are the people who arenot my people.

(15:14):
So I don't need to waste timeon that anymore.
This is how you grow.
This is how you build.
If I never did that, if I wouldhave taken the first no's that I
got in responses to my phonecalls and my texts and my emails
and my podcast episodeseverything if I would have taken
all of the no's and had themmean that I was doing the wrong

(15:37):
thing.
So I should stop where would Ibe now?
I would be in my comfort zone,doing nothing, not living the
life that I'm living right nowand being unhappy.
So I needed to be uncomfortable, I needed to be bold, I needed
to be brave.
I don't want you to spendanother year thinking about it.

(16:02):
You are not lost, my friend, Ipromise.
You are just at the beginning.
You're not too late, you are ontime.
Remember I said success is notbuilt by making perfect choices.
It is built by making enoughbrave choices.
That's how you land whereyou're meant to be.
You only need one tiny bravemove to start building the life

(16:24):
that's so aligned that it feelslike home, and I want to help
you do it.
Thank you so much for hangingout with me today.
If this episode gave you thatlittle punch in the gut that you
needed in the best way, pleaseshare it with someone else who
might be stuck and is waitingfor that sign, because,
newsflash, you are the sign.
Go out there, build some damnclarity, use this to create your

(16:49):
day in the best way possible,and I will see you next week.
Before we go, I am going to askyou to hit pause, go to
wherever you are listening tothis podcast and leave a rating
and a review.
It is the greatest way for usto reach a larger audience, and
the more people we reach, themore people we help, and it's
all because of you.

(17:09):
Thank you so much, everyone.
I appreciate you and I will seeyou next week.
Until then, take care ofyourself, take care of each
other.
Have a good one.