July 29, 2025 • 27 mins
We've created a culture where being overwhelmed is somehow proof we're important, but this busy badge of honor is killing our businesses and our souls. Confusing activity with achievement leads to spinning our wheels without making meaningful progress.
• Busy work vs. business work: theatrical activities that look like work but don't create results
• The four costs of constant busyness: money, relationships, health, and your dreams
• How to audit your time: track what you're actually doing for three days
• Four categories of activities: important/urgent, important/not urgent, urgent/not important, neither
• Create a "stop doing list" instead of adding more to your to-do list
• Successful entrepreneurs protect their time, focus on outcomes not activities, and don't glorify exhaustion
• Rate your energy levels throughout the day to identify sustainable activities
Your homework is to audit your time and energy for three days. The goal isn't to be less busy—it's to be busy with things that actually matter. Take care of yourself and create your day in the best way possible.
Thanks for listening!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Hi, my friends, welcome back to the Create your
Day podcast.
I'm your host, Jen Cody, andI'm so happy that you are here
with me today.
I am on my third cup of coffeeand that tells you everything
you need to know about how myperfectly planned day has gone.
But I realized something thisweek.
There's a lot of talk in theworld about busy being an
(00:37):
identity, and I think I startedfinding myself falling into that
where being overwhelmed feelslike this badge of honor.
And it's not just me.
This is something that goes onwith a lot of people.
I was actually talking with afriend just last week.
She asked how I was doing and,without even missing a beat, I
said oh my God, I'm so busy.
(00:58):
I'm like drowning busy.
And she nodded, kind of,looking at me, like me, like is
this a good thing?
Like is drowning an achievementthat you want to be celebrating
?
So I started thinking like whendid we decide?
Or when did I decide thatspinning my wheels was the same
(01:19):
thing as moving forward?
Because that's what I realizedmost of us are doing we're
spinning, we're busy, yes, we'retired, yes, but are we actually
getting somewhere?
So this is what I want to talkto you guys about today, the
busy badge of honor.
I want to tell you about aclient of mine.
(01:41):
She came to see me last month,totally burned out.
She was working seriouslysomething like 60 hours a week.
She had a million differentprojects going on at once and
really felt that she wasconstantly behind on everything.
So I asked her what the biggestgoal was right now, what's
going on that you need toaccomplish first, and she just
(02:04):
stared at me.
She just stared at me for afull 20, 30 seconds and said
honestly, jen, I don't knowanymore.
I'm just trying to keep my headabove water and my heart just
broke because I know what thatfeels like and her story is
everyone's story right now.
We have created this culturewhere being overwhelmed is
(02:27):
somehow proof that we'reimportant, proof that we matter,
proof that we're working hardenough to deserve the success
that's coming to us.
But I'm going to tell yousomething she was actually
making less money than she wasmaking two years ago, when she
was working half the hours.
All of that busyness, it wasnot productive, it was just busy
(02:50):
.
And honestly, I really see thateverywhere.
Entrepreneurs are out therebragging about pulling
all-nighters.
They think it makes them lookmore important, right?
Business owners wear this badge,this exhaustion, on them like
it's a new Louis bag, and we'vereally started to confuse
(03:12):
activity with achievement, andit's killing our businesses.
It is killing our souls.
So what's the truth here?
The truth is that we areaddicted to chaos because the
chaos feels important, it feelslike we're doing something.
That chaos is giving uspermission to feel accomplished
without us having to actuallyaccomplish something.
(03:34):
Did you hear that?
Think about the last moment thatyou felt was chaotic in your
business and didn't you feelsomehow, when that passed, that
you lived through something,that you got through something
you felt accomplished withoutactually accomplishing anything?
So you know the hamster wheelanalogy, right?
(03:58):
I want you to think about thathamster wheel.
The hamster is moving reallyfast, working really hard,
getting hamster sweaty and, fromthe hamster's perspective,
they're crushing it.
They're in motion, they'reburning calories, they feel
productive, but they're notgoing anywhere.
And that is most of people inbusiness.
You're the hamster.
(04:18):
You've built yourself this mostelaborate, sophisticated
hamster wheel that you've everseen and you've got these
systems, maybe some projectmanagement going on, maybe a
productivity app, maybe morningroutines.
You have all of that happeningwhich makes you feel important
and accomplished and like you'reon top of it, but are you
(04:40):
actually going anywhere?
So I realized this in my ownbusiness, maybe one or two years
ago yeah, probably about twoyears ago.
I was working more hours thanever, busier than I had ever
been, but somehow was makingless progress than when I first
started.
I had this moment, so join mein picturing this.
(05:02):
Right now I'm standing in mykitchen it's like nine o'clock
at night.
I'm still in my pajamas fromthat morning and I thought what
the hell am I doing?
I pulled up my calendar andstarted to really look to see if
I could identify what I hadaccomplished, not what I had
(05:23):
been busy with, but what had Iactually moved forward.
And I have to tell yousomething the list was really
short.
The list of what I was workingon was really long, but none of
it was actually coming tofruition.
Most of my time was what I spenton like these theatrical
(05:44):
activities that look like workbut they're not actually
creating results.
So when you think about thoseactivities, those theatrical
activities, let's talk aboutthat, because I'm willing to bet
that you're performing a littlebit in your own show.
These activities include thingslike endless research.
(06:05):
Research is great, but ifyou're not going to apply the
research, what are you doing?
Why are you doing it?
You know we spend weeks andweeks researching the perfect
email platform, instead of justpicking one and actually sending
the emails.
Or maybe your theatricalactivity is perfectionism.
Are you creating detailedstrategies, and maybe that even
(06:28):
includes things like mood boardsor competitive analysis for
products that you have not evenbegun to validate in the market
yet?
Let's talk about social media.
How many hours are you spendingcrafting the perfect post,
whether that's going onInstagram, linkedin, your
Facebook group?
(06:48):
How much time are you spendingthinking that you're being
productive, but what you'reactually avoiding is work that
would make you productive?
What about networking?
Networking is productive, right.
Network is moving the needle.
But if you're networking forthe sake of networking, just to
(07:09):
say you're doing it, you'regoing to all of these virtual
coffee dates and mixers, butthere's no real intention behind
it.
What are you hoping to leavethese networking sessions with?
Is there any intention behindthat activity?
Administrative work, organizingyour files, updating your
(07:30):
website copy for the 15th timeor 50th time, if you're me,
creating new folder systems,anything that feels productive
but does not actually serveclients or generate revenue?
So I'm going to tell you thatnight in the kitchen at nine
o'clock, when I'm in my stupidsweatpants from the morning at
(07:50):
this moment in my business, Iwas the queen of these
activities.
My Google Drive was soorganized oh my goodness, chef's
kiss.
My project management system.
I had Trello.
I had Notion Everything.
My brand colors were exactlywhat I wanted them to be across
every platform.
But let me tell you, if I pullthe curtain back a little bit
(08:12):
and show you my bank account orthe actual growth of my business
, there was not so much going on.
So this is what I call the storywe tell ourselves.
So this is what I call thestory we tell ourselves.
This is what we say toourselves when we're stuck in
the busy trap.
I just need to get through thisbusy period air quotes and then
(08:33):
I'll focus on what reallymatters.
But if you notice that busyperiod never goes away.
We keep creating more busy work.
We're trying to fill that spaceand we think that we are
amazing.
We think that we are on top ofit because we're so busy.
How many things are we sayingno to when we should be saying
(08:54):
yes to them?
Because we're saying yes tothings that just keep us active.
It's like the person who saysthey're going to start eating
healthy after the holidays, butthen it is after the holidays,
but then they have a vacationcoming up and then it's after
this stressful work time, thenit's somebody's birthday and I
just have one more weekend toget through before I can pay
(09:14):
attention to my eating habits.
We use busyness as a sociallyacceptable way to avoid work, to
avoid the scary work, to avoidthe work that matters but
doesn't guarantee our results,and that's why it's scary.
We want to focus on things thatgive us a bam instant
gratification.
(09:35):
Updating my website copy feelsgreat.
I hit publish and all of mywork is in front of me to admire
and all of my work is in frontof me to admire.
These things keep us busy.
But what is that actually doingwhen it comes to the service
I'm trying to provide?
Nothing is actually happeningwhen I'm just updating my
(09:57):
website copy, because what'sreally scary terrifying
sometimes is having the time tothink about what we really want,
having the space to consider amI building something meaningful
or am I just building something?
Do you have the bandwidth toask yourself some hard questions
(10:20):
like is this working?
And if the answer is no.
Can you pivot?
Do you have the strength andthe clarity to make that pivot?
What would you do if you werenot afraid of these thoughts?
Being busy is what protects usfrom these questions.
If we're always rushing to thenext thing, we don't have to
(10:42):
pause, we don't have to evaluate, it doesn't matter if we're in
the right direction.
We just know we're doingsomething and there's a cost to
that.
Spinning our wheels, thishamster wheel, constant spinning
.
There is a real cost to thatand I really want you to hear
this, because the first thingit's costing you, it's money,
nevermind the time that's beingwasted.
(11:03):
When you're scattered across 17different priorities, you are
not allowing yourself to go deepenough on any of them to create
real results.
That surface level effort.
Guess what it creates?
Surface level results.
The next thing it's costing youRelationships Relationships
with clients, relationships withyour family.
(11:25):
When you're always frazzled andoverwhelmed, are you giving
100% of yourself to anyone?
You're not showing up fully foranybody at all, whether that's
your team, your family, yourclients, your dog, like you're
not showing up fully in any partof your life.
That is exhausting.
(11:46):
Third and actually this probablyshould be first on the list
it's costing your health becausechronic stress stress of always
being behind, always having toomuch to do, always feeling like
you're failing, not sustainableyour body is keeping score.
Even when your mind is tryingto push through, your body knows
what's going on.
You know I'm going to go off ona tangent for a second, as I do
(12:09):
, and you guys know this.
When I was in labor with my son, the epidural was so strong
that I literally could not evenlift my legs.
I was completely numb, in zeropain.
I was vomiting over and overand over again and the nurse
told me at one point she waslike you know, your body is
still reacting to the stress andthe pain, even though you can't
(12:30):
feel it.
So, no matter how much you tryto numb, what's going on around
you, your body is keeping score.
Remember that, your body iskeeping score.
Remember that.
And fourth, this is the big oneit is costing you your dreams.
Every single day that you spendspinning your wheels is another
day that you are not buildingtowards the vision that actually
(12:52):
excites you.
I had a client tell me one timeI'm so busy keeping my business
running that I never have timeto actually grow the business.
That hit me because it isexactly where I was at the time
too.
And if we are not growing, weare standing still.
A business that is just runningis on a hamster wheel.
(13:14):
We need to be growing and inorder to grow, ironically, you
need to stop sometimes.
I'm telling you right now youhave permission to stop.
You have permission to say noto half the things on your to-do
list.
Permission to say no and closesome of those tabs, literally
(13:35):
and metaphorically.
Look at your computer right now.
What is on there?
How many tabs do you have open?
How many of them are youleaving open because you're
afraid that they're going totrigger something that you need
to be doing, so you want toleave it there to see it right.
I know, I see you, I do thesame thing, but we have to step
(13:56):
back and give ourselvespermission, have to step back
and give ourselves permission.
We need permission sometimes toallow us to disappoint some
people, because we willdisappoint people who have
gotten used to us respondingimmediately and being endlessly
available.
Those people might be a littledisappointed when we put some
boundaries up, but I'm tellingyou right now doing less it will
(14:20):
help you achieve more, and Iknow that that sounds simple.
It sounds like I'm you knowdistilling it down to a, you
know a Hallmark card Do less,accomplish more.
It is simple, but we have beenconditioned to believe that our
success requires suffering, thatif it's not hard, that means
we're not trying enough.
But what if that is justanother lie that we've been
(14:47):
telling ourselves?
What if the people out therewho seem to have it all figured
out, they're not working morehours than you, they're just
spending their time on the rightthings?
So I want to share with you theone question that can change how
you approach your business andyour life.
I want you to ask yourself thenext time you're doing something
not right now, because whatyou're doing right now is
(15:08):
listening to this podcast, andthat's important but next time
you're doing something to workon your business like a physical
activity, ask yourself is thisthe most important thing I could
be doing right now?
Not, is this important?
Because everything feelsimportant when you're
overwhelmed.
The question is whether it isthe most important.
(15:29):
When I started asking myselfthis question before I said yes
to anything, before I would saylike open up a new rabbit hole
to go down or agree to a callBefore I started reorganizing my
email folders, everythingchanged?
If I asked myself this questionBecause most of the time the
answer was no I was defaultingto doing something that was busy
(15:52):
work, doing something that mademe feel productive over the
actual work.
So think of it this way there'sbusy work and there is business
work.
You want to choose progress,not just motion.
You want to choose beingproductive over feeling
productive, and that's adifficult choice to make
(16:14):
sometimes.
So I'm going to help you decideand really put some things in
place that are going to get youon the right side of business
work right.
So cancel the busy work, let'sfocus on the business work, and
that requires us gettingpractical about some things.
What I want you to do might be alittle uncomfortable and it
(16:36):
will also be revealing.
We're going to do something toaudit your time.
For the next three days.
I want you to track what you'redoing, not how you think you're
spending your time or howyou're planning to spend it, but
what are you actually doing?
Set a timer to go off on yourwatch well, if you have an Apple
watch or on your phone,wherever you have alarms set,
(16:58):
set an alarm to go off everyhour on the hour.
You can make it silent if youhave alarms set.
Set an alarm to go off everyhour on the hour.
You can make it silent ifyou're in meetings, it's okay,
but set that alarm for everyhour during your work hours,
when it goes off.
I want you to write down whatyou just did for the past hour.
Don't judge it, don't try tochange it.
Just observe, be curious aboutyour patterns, notice where you
(17:21):
find them.
Maybe you'll discover thatyou're spending a few hours a
day checking email, or thatyou're losing an hour every day
to social media before you evenstart working.
That's an easy thing to do, sodon't beat yourself up over it.
This is about recognizingwhat's going on.
This is not about shamingyourself.
That's not the goal.
Our goal here is to get clearon where the time actually goes,
(17:47):
so that conscious choices canbe made about where we want it
to go.
So, once you've done this, takeeverything that you discover and
you're going to put it intosome categories.
Look at each hour of your dayand how you spent it.
Now, during these businesshours, there's going to be
things you do that aren'tbusinessy right, like maybe at
two o'clock you went to yourson's basketball game or
(18:08):
something like that.
That's totally fine.
Just write down all the thingsthat you've done.
Then they're going to go intofour categories.
The first one, important andurgent.
These are your priorities.
The first one, important andurgent, these are your
priorities.
This is work that has adeadline, the activities that
(18:30):
directly generate revenue ordirectly serve your customers.
So if you're on a coaching callthat's if I'm on a coaching
call I should say that'simportant and urgent.
That is me delivering serviceto my clients.
So that's important and urgent.
Then there's important but noturgent.
So this is where that behindthe scenes magic that you do.
This is where that lives.
This is your planning, yourstrategy, relationship building,
(18:53):
skill development, creativework.
We don't ever really get to thisquadrant because we're so busy
with everything else.
But this is important stuff.
Hence the label important, noturgent.
Then there's urgent but notimportant.
These are things that arestealing our time, other
(19:14):
people's emergencies.
They somehow become ourpriorities.
Who?
No one knows how that wizardryworks yet, but it happens every
day.
Meetings that could have beenemails, busy work that feels
important but doesn't moveanything forward.
Urgent but not important, andthen neither urgent nor
(19:36):
important.
These are the time wasters,social media scrolling,
organizing your kitchen cabinetsthat are organized 400 times
over, research that never leadsto action.
Those types of things.
Most business owners that I workwith they're living in three
and four Most successful, I'msorry.
(19:57):
Most overwhelmed people that Iwork with.
They're living in three andfour Most successful, I'm sorry.
Most overwhelmed people that Iwork with they're living in
three and four.
The successful people that Iwork with.
They are spending almost all oftheir time in one and two and
we all have these activitiesthat we're doing every day and
we all have control over them.
It's recognizing how much timewe're giving to the things that
(20:20):
don't matter that has to happenfirst so that we can make the
changes that we need to make.
So I want you to stop creatingto-do lists, because we all have
them, and what I want you tocreate is a stop doing list.
This is going to beuncomfortable and that's how you
know it's working.
So look at the results of theexercise that you did and
(20:45):
identify three things thatyou're going to stop doing.
Not do less of Things thatyou're going to stop doing
entirely.
Maybe it's a networking groupthat has never led to anything.
Maybe it's checking email firstthing in the morning, because
it sets you up to answer otherpeople's problems before your
own.
Maybe it's spending an houreach day making graphics for
(21:08):
social media posts that get twolikes.
We don't need to be wasting ourtime doing that.
So here's the thing about thestop doing list.
This is going to create spacefor the things that do matter.
You cannot add more importantwork to a schedule that is
already bursting at the seams.
We need to remove theunimportant work first and then
(21:29):
add what matters.
And yes, people are going tonotice.
People are going to bedisappointed.
That's okay.
Their disappointment is notyour emergency.
Your dreams are yourresponsibility.
But I still want to go a littlebit deeper, just for a minute,
because I think there'ssomething underneath all this
(21:51):
busyness that we don't reallytalk about so much.
Sometimes we stay busy becausewe are afraid of what we are
going to discover in those quietmoments.
So what if you slowed down andyou realized that you've been
building the wrong thing?
What if you created space tothink and discovered that you're
(22:12):
not actually passionate aboutwhat you're doing?
What if you stopped moving longenough to feel how unhappy you
really are?
Those are some scary thoughts,and it's easier to stay busy
than it is to face them, but youknow what's scarier Spending
years of your life buildingsomething that doesn't matter to
(22:33):
you, because you were tooafraid to pause and consider
what does?
I once worked with someone whorealized that, when she finally
stopped spinning, she had beenbuilding something that she
really didn't want.
And actually I had a client aseparate client that had such a
great analogy for that.
She was like you need to stoponce in a while while you're
climbing the ladder and makesure your ladder is leaning on
(22:56):
the right building Props to you,janae.
I love that analogy.
So this client she realized shewas building a business that
she didn't want.
She had gotten so caught up inwhat she thought she was
supposed to do that she neverasked herself what she really
wanted to do.
The good news, though, is thatonce she figured that out,
(23:17):
everything got easier, and itdidn't get easy.
It got easier Because, whenyou're working on something that
really matters to you, youdon't have to force the
motivation, you don't have totrick yourself into caring.
The energy is already there, soit gets easier.
I'm going to share with you nowwhat I know that successful
(23:39):
entrepreneurs do not do.
They do not glorify exhaustion.
They don't brag about howlittle sleep they got or how
many hours they've worked.
They talk about their results.
They talk about their impact.
They talk about the problemsthey solved.
They talk about the people theyhelped.
Successful entrepreneurs areprotective of their time and
(24:00):
intentional with their energy.
They say no to goodopportunities so they can say
yes to great opportunities.
They focus on outcomes and noton activities.
Here's what's surprising.
Often they're working lesshours than the struggling
entrepreneurs who are always sobusy.
Because when you're clear onwhat matters and you focus all
(24:24):
of your energy there, you getmore done in less time.
Efficiency becomes yoursidekick.
You don't have to worry aboutwhen things are going to get
done, because you know they aregoing to get done.
So, besides just tracking andauditing your time, I also want
you to pay attention to yourenergy For those same three days
(24:47):
that you're putting things inthose buckets for important and
urgent, important but not urgentall of those buckets those same
three days.
I want you to rate your energylevel after each hour, so when
you're putting in.
During the last hour, I did X,y and Z.
Where was your energy level?
Scale of one to 10, 10 beingthe highest You're going to
(25:07):
start to notice patterns.
Certain activities are draining, even when they should be
energizing, and other thingsfill you up, even when they're
challenging.
So this information, it is likegold, because it tells you not
just where your time goes, butwhich activities are going to be
sustainable on a long-termbasis.
If you're spending most of yourtime on activities that rate
(25:31):
like four or below, you're goingto be exhausted all the time.
So this is not about workingharder.
It's about working on thingsthat energize you instead of
depleting you.
So, before we wrap up, I wantyou to just take one last little
bit of permission from me.
This is your officialpermission slip to stop wearing
busyness as a badge of honor.
(25:53):
You have permission to workfewer hours and accomplish more.
You have permission to workfewer hours and accomplish more.
You have permission to say nowithout explaining yourself.
Prioritize your peace aboveother people's urgency.
That's a really big one.
Build a business that energizesyou instead of exhausts you,
and I want you to care moreabout your results than you do
(26:14):
about being busy.
You don't need to earn theright to have boundaries.
You don't need to prove thatyou're working hard enough by
being overwhelmed.
You don't need anyone'sapproval to choose progress over
motion.
So we're going to talk moreabout this in the weeks to come.
We're actually going to speaknext time about some um,
(26:37):
expensive procrastination.
So stick around for that, and,but for now, I want you to just
sit with this question whatwould you be doing with your
time if you were not trying tolook busy?
And I want you to really thinkabout it, because that might be
the most important question youask yourself.
Your homework is those actionsteps we talked about.
(26:59):
Audit your time and audit yourenergy.
Don't try to do it perfectly.
Just start and see what youdiscover.
And remember this the goal isnot to be less busy.
The goal is to be busy withthings that actually matter.
There is a difference, and yourfuture self is counting on you
to figure out what thatdifference looks like for you.
(27:20):
So until next time, take careof yourself, take care of each
other, use this information tostop spinning and create your
day in the best way possible.
There is something out thereright now just waiting for you
to build it, and you have to befocused on the right things in
order to make that happen.
Have a great one, everyone.
(27:41):
See you next week.
Hi, my friends, welcome back to the Create your
Day podcast.
I'm your host, Jen Cody, andI'm so happy that you are here
with me today.
I am on my third cup of coffeeand that tells you everything
you need to know about how myperfectly planned day has gone.
But I realized something thisweek.
There's a lot of talk in theworld about busy being an
(00:37):
identity, and I think I startedfinding myself falling into that
where being overwhelmed feelslike this badge of honor.
And it's not just me.
This is something that goes onwith a lot of people.
I was actually talking with afriend just last week.
She asked how I was doing and,without even missing a beat, I
said oh my God, I'm so busy.
(00:58):
I'm like drowning busy.
And she nodded, kind of,looking at me, like me, like is
this a good thing?
Like is drowning an achievementthat you want to be celebrating
?
So I started thinking like whendid we decide?
Or when did I decide thatspinning my wheels was the same
(01:19):
thing as moving forward?
Because that's what I realizedmost of us are doing we're
spinning, we're busy, yes, we'retired, yes, but are we actually
getting somewhere?
So this is what I want to talkto you guys about today, the
busy badge of honor.
I want to tell you about aclient of mine.
(01:41):
She came to see me last month,totally burned out.
She was working seriouslysomething like 60 hours a week.
She had a million differentprojects going on at once and
really felt that she wasconstantly behind on everything.
So I asked her what the biggestgoal was right now, what's
going on that you need toaccomplish first, and she just
(02:04):
stared at me.
She just stared at me for afull 20, 30 seconds and said
honestly, jen, I don't knowanymore.
I'm just trying to keep my headabove water and my heart just
broke because I know what thatfeels like and her story is
everyone's story right now.
We have created this culturewhere being overwhelmed is
(02:27):
somehow proof that we'reimportant, proof that we matter,
proof that we're working hardenough to deserve the success
that's coming to us.
But I'm going to tell yousomething she was actually
making less money than she wasmaking two years ago, when she
was working half the hours.
All of that busyness, it wasnot productive, it was just busy
(02:50):
.
And honestly, I really see thateverywhere.
Entrepreneurs are out therebragging about pulling
all-nighters.
They think it makes them lookmore important, right?
Business owners wear this badge,this exhaustion, on them like
it's a new Louis bag, and we'vereally started to confuse
(03:12):
activity with achievement, andit's killing our businesses.
It is killing our souls.
So what's the truth here?
The truth is that we areaddicted to chaos because the
chaos feels important, it feelslike we're doing something.
That chaos is giving uspermission to feel accomplished
without us having to actuallyaccomplish something.
(03:34):
Did you hear that?
Think about the last moment thatyou felt was chaotic in your
business and didn't you feelsomehow, when that passed, that
you lived through something,that you got through something
you felt accomplished withoutactually accomplishing anything?
So you know the hamster wheelanalogy, right?
(03:58):
I want you to think about thathamster wheel.
The hamster is moving reallyfast, working really hard,
getting hamster sweaty and, fromthe hamster's perspective,
they're crushing it.
They're in motion, they'reburning calories, they feel
productive, but they're notgoing anywhere.
And that is most of people inbusiness.
You're the hamster.
(04:18):
You've built yourself this mostelaborate, sophisticated
hamster wheel that you've everseen and you've got these
systems, maybe some projectmanagement going on, maybe a
productivity app, maybe morningroutines.
You have all of that happeningwhich makes you feel important
and accomplished and like you'reon top of it, but are you
(04:40):
actually going anywhere?
So I realized this in my ownbusiness, maybe one or two years
ago yeah, probably about twoyears ago.
I was working more hours thanever, busier than I had ever
been, but somehow was makingless progress than when I first
started.
I had this moment, so join mein picturing this.
(05:02):
Right now I'm standing in mykitchen it's like nine o'clock
at night.
I'm still in my pajamas fromthat morning and I thought what
the hell am I doing?
I pulled up my calendar andstarted to really look to see if
I could identify what I hadaccomplished, not what I had
(05:23):
been busy with, but what had Iactually moved forward.
And I have to tell yousomething the list was really
short.
The list of what I was workingon was really long, but none of
it was actually coming tofruition.
Most of my time was what I spenton like these theatrical
(05:44):
activities that look like workbut they're not actually
creating results.
So when you think about thoseactivities, those theatrical
activities, let's talk aboutthat, because I'm willing to bet
that you're performing a littlebit in your own show.
These activities include thingslike endless research.
(06:05):
Research is great, but ifyou're not going to apply the
research, what are you doing?
Why are you doing it?
You know we spend weeks andweeks researching the perfect
email platform, instead of justpicking one and actually sending
the emails.
Or maybe your theatricalactivity is perfectionism.
Are you creating detailedstrategies, and maybe that even
(06:28):
includes things like mood boardsor competitive analysis for
products that you have not evenbegun to validate in the market
yet?
Let's talk about social media.
How many hours are you spendingcrafting the perfect post,
whether that's going onInstagram, linkedin, your
Facebook group?
(06:48):
How much time are you spendingthinking that you're being
productive, but what you'reactually avoiding is work that
would make you productive?
What about networking?
Networking is productive, right.
Network is moving the needle.
But if you're networking forthe sake of networking, just to
(07:09):
say you're doing it, you'regoing to all of these virtual
coffee dates and mixers, butthere's no real intention behind
it.
What are you hoping to leavethese networking sessions with?
Is there any intention behindthat activity?
Administrative work, organizingyour files, updating your
(07:30):
website copy for the 15th timeor 50th time, if you're me,
creating new folder systems,anything that feels productive
but does not actually serveclients or generate revenue?
So I'm going to tell you thatnight in the kitchen at nine
o'clock, when I'm in my stupidsweatpants from the morning at
(07:50):
this moment in my business, Iwas the queen of these
activities.
My Google Drive was soorganized oh my goodness, chef's
kiss.
My project management system.
I had Trello.
I had Notion Everything.
My brand colors were exactlywhat I wanted them to be across
every platform.
But let me tell you, if I pullthe curtain back a little bit
(08:12):
and show you my bank account orthe actual growth of my business
, there was not so much going on.
So this is what I call the storywe tell ourselves.
So this is what I call thestory we tell ourselves.
This is what we say toourselves when we're stuck in
the busy trap.
I just need to get through thisbusy period air quotes and then
(08:33):
I'll focus on what reallymatters.
But if you notice that busyperiod never goes away.
We keep creating more busy work.
We're trying to fill that spaceand we think that we are
amazing.
We think that we are on top ofit because we're so busy.
How many things are we sayingno to when we should be saying
(08:54):
yes to them?
Because we're saying yes tothings that just keep us active.
It's like the person who saysthey're going to start eating
healthy after the holidays, butthen it is after the holidays,
but then they have a vacationcoming up and then it's after
this stressful work time, thenit's somebody's birthday and I
just have one more weekend toget through before I can pay
(09:14):
attention to my eating habits.
We use busyness as a sociallyacceptable way to avoid work, to
avoid the scary work, to avoidthe work that matters but
doesn't guarantee our results,and that's why it's scary.
We want to focus on things thatgive us a bam instant
gratification.
(09:35):
Updating my website copy feelsgreat.
I hit publish and all of mywork is in front of me to admire
and all of my work is in frontof me to admire.
These things keep us busy.
But what is that actually doingwhen it comes to the service
I'm trying to provide?
Nothing is actually happeningwhen I'm just updating my
(09:57):
website copy, because what'sreally scary terrifying
sometimes is having the time tothink about what we really want,
having the space to consider amI building something meaningful
or am I just building something?
Do you have the bandwidth toask yourself some hard questions
(10:20):
like is this working?
And if the answer is no.
Can you pivot?
Do you have the strength andthe clarity to make that pivot?
What would you do if you werenot afraid of these thoughts?
Being busy is what protects usfrom these questions.
If we're always rushing to thenext thing, we don't have to
(10:42):
pause, we don't have to evaluate, it doesn't matter if we're in
the right direction.
We just know we're doingsomething and there's a cost to
that.
Spinning our wheels, thishamster wheel, constant spinning
.
There is a real cost to thatand I really want you to hear
this, because the first thingit's costing you, it's money,
nevermind the time that's beingwasted.
(11:03):
When you're scattered across 17different priorities, you are
not allowing yourself to go deepenough on any of them to create
real results.
That surface level effort.
Guess what it creates?
Surface level results.
The next thing it's costing youRelationships Relationships
with clients, relationships withyour family.
(11:25):
When you're always frazzled andoverwhelmed, are you giving
100% of yourself to anyone?
You're not showing up fully foranybody at all, whether that's
your team, your family, yourclients, your dog, like you're
not showing up fully in any partof your life.
That is exhausting.
(11:46):
Third and actually this probablyshould be first on the list
it's costing your health becausechronic stress stress of always
being behind, always having toomuch to do, always feeling like
you're failing, not sustainableyour body is keeping score.
Even when your mind is tryingto push through, your body knows
what's going on.
You know I'm going to go off ona tangent for a second, as I do
(12:09):
, and you guys know this.
When I was in labor with my son, the epidural was so strong
that I literally could not evenlift my legs.
I was completely numb, in zeropain.
I was vomiting over and overand over again and the nurse
told me at one point she waslike you know, your body is
still reacting to the stress andthe pain, even though you can't
(12:30):
feel it.
So, no matter how much you tryto numb, what's going on around
you, your body is keeping score.
Remember that, your body iskeeping score.
Remember that.
And fourth, this is the big oneit is costing you your dreams.
Every single day that you spendspinning your wheels is another
day that you are not buildingtowards the vision that actually
(12:52):
excites you.
I had a client tell me one timeI'm so busy keeping my business
running that I never have timeto actually grow the business.
That hit me because it isexactly where I was at the time
too.
And if we are not growing, weare standing still.
A business that is just runningis on a hamster wheel.
(13:14):
We need to be growing and inorder to grow, ironically, you
need to stop sometimes.
I'm telling you right now youhave permission to stop.
You have permission to say noto half the things on your to-do
list.
Permission to say no and closesome of those tabs, literally
(13:35):
and metaphorically.
Look at your computer right now.
What is on there?
How many tabs do you have open?
How many of them are youleaving open because you're
afraid that they're going totrigger something that you need
to be doing, so you want toleave it there to see it right.
I know, I see you, I do thesame thing, but we have to step
(13:56):
back and give ourselvespermission, have to step back
and give ourselves permission.
We need permission sometimes toallow us to disappoint some
people, because we willdisappoint people who have
gotten used to us respondingimmediately and being endlessly
available.
Those people might be a littledisappointed when we put some
boundaries up, but I'm tellingyou right now doing less it will
(14:20):
help you achieve more, and Iknow that that sounds simple.
It sounds like I'm you knowdistilling it down to a, you
know a Hallmark card Do less,accomplish more.
It is simple, but we have beenconditioned to believe that our
success requires suffering, thatif it's not hard, that means
we're not trying enough.
But what if that is justanother lie that we've been
(14:47):
telling ourselves?
What if the people out therewho seem to have it all figured
out, they're not working morehours than you, they're just
spending their time on the rightthings?
So I want to share with you theone question that can change how
you approach your business andyour life.
I want you to ask yourself thenext time you're doing something
not right now, because whatyou're doing right now is
(15:08):
listening to this podcast, andthat's important but next time
you're doing something to workon your business like a physical
activity, ask yourself is thisthe most important thing I could
be doing right now?
Not, is this important?
Because everything feelsimportant when you're
overwhelmed.
The question is whether it isthe most important.
(15:29):
When I started asking myselfthis question before I said yes
to anything, before I would saylike open up a new rabbit hole
to go down or agree to a callBefore I started reorganizing my
email folders, everythingchanged?
If I asked myself this questionBecause most of the time the
answer was no I was defaultingto doing something that was busy
(15:52):
work, doing something that mademe feel productive over the
actual work.
So think of it this way there'sbusy work and there is business
work.
You want to choose progress,not just motion.
You want to choose beingproductive over feeling
productive, and that's adifficult choice to make
(16:14):
sometimes.
So I'm going to help you decideand really put some things in
place that are going to get youon the right side of business
work right.
So cancel the busy work, let'sfocus on the business work, and
that requires us gettingpractical about some things.
What I want you to do might be alittle uncomfortable and it
(16:36):
will also be revealing.
We're going to do something toaudit your time.
For the next three days.
I want you to track what you'redoing, not how you think you're
spending your time or howyou're planning to spend it, but
what are you actually doing?
Set a timer to go off on yourwatch well, if you have an Apple
watch or on your phone,wherever you have alarms set,
(16:58):
set an alarm to go off everyhour on the hour.
You can make it silent if youhave alarms set.
Set an alarm to go off everyhour on the hour.
You can make it silent ifyou're in meetings, it's okay,
but set that alarm for everyhour during your work hours,
when it goes off.
I want you to write down whatyou just did for the past hour.
Don't judge it, don't try tochange it.
Just observe, be curious aboutyour patterns, notice where you
(17:21):
find them.
Maybe you'll discover thatyou're spending a few hours a
day checking email, or thatyou're losing an hour every day
to social media before you evenstart working.
That's an easy thing to do, sodon't beat yourself up over it.
This is about recognizingwhat's going on.
This is not about shamingyourself.
That's not the goal.
Our goal here is to get clearon where the time actually goes,
(17:47):
so that conscious choices canbe made about where we want it
to go.
So, once you've done this, takeeverything that you discover and
you're going to put it intosome categories.
Look at each hour of your dayand how you spent it.
Now, during these businesshours, there's going to be
things you do that aren'tbusinessy right, like maybe at
two o'clock you went to yourson's basketball game or
(18:08):
something like that.
That's totally fine.
Just write down all the thingsthat you've done.
Then they're going to go intofour categories.
The first one, important andurgent.
These are your priorities.
The first one, important andurgent, these are your
priorities.
This is work that has adeadline, the activities that
(18:30):
directly generate revenue ordirectly serve your customers.
So if you're on a coaching callthat's if I'm on a coaching
call I should say that'simportant and urgent.
That is me delivering serviceto my clients.
So that's important and urgent.
Then there's important but noturgent.
So this is where that behindthe scenes magic that you do.
This is where that lives.
This is your planning, yourstrategy, relationship building,
(18:53):
skill development, creativework.
We don't ever really get to thisquadrant because we're so busy
with everything else.
But this is important stuff.
Hence the label important, noturgent.
Then there's urgent but notimportant.
These are things that arestealing our time, other
(19:14):
people's emergencies.
They somehow become ourpriorities.
Who?
No one knows how that wizardryworks yet, but it happens every
day.
Meetings that could have beenemails, busy work that feels
important but doesn't moveanything forward.
Urgent but not important, andthen neither urgent nor
(19:36):
important.
These are the time wasters,social media scrolling,
organizing your kitchen cabinetsthat are organized 400 times
over, research that never leadsto action.
Those types of things.
Most business owners that I workwith they're living in three
and four Most successful, I'msorry.
(19:57):
Most overwhelmed people that Iwork with.
They're living in three andfour Most successful, I'm sorry.
Most overwhelmed people that Iwork with they're living in
three and four.
The successful people that Iwork with.
They are spending almost all oftheir time in one and two and
we all have these activitiesthat we're doing every day and
we all have control over them.
It's recognizing how much timewe're giving to the things that
(20:20):
don't matter that has to happenfirst so that we can make the
changes that we need to make.
So I want you to stop creatingto-do lists, because we all have
them, and what I want you tocreate is a stop doing list.
This is going to beuncomfortable and that's how you
know it's working.
So look at the results of theexercise that you did and
(20:45):
identify three things thatyou're going to stop doing.
Not do less of Things thatyou're going to stop doing
entirely.
Maybe it's a networking groupthat has never led to anything.
Maybe it's checking email firstthing in the morning, because
it sets you up to answer otherpeople's problems before your
own.
Maybe it's spending an houreach day making graphics for
(21:08):
social media posts that get twolikes.
We don't need to be wasting ourtime doing that.
So here's the thing about thestop doing list.
This is going to create spacefor the things that do matter.
You cannot add more importantwork to a schedule that is
already bursting at the seams.
We need to remove theunimportant work first and then
(21:29):
add what matters.
And yes, people are going tonotice.
People are going to bedisappointed.
That's okay.
Their disappointment is notyour emergency.
Your dreams are yourresponsibility.
But I still want to go a littlebit deeper, just for a minute,
because I think there'ssomething underneath all this
(21:51):
busyness that we don't reallytalk about so much.
Sometimes we stay busy becausewe are afraid of what we are
going to discover in those quietmoments.
So what if you slowed down andyou realized that you've been
building the wrong thing?
What if you created space tothink and discovered that you're
(22:12):
not actually passionate aboutwhat you're doing?
What if you stopped moving longenough to feel how unhappy you
really are?
Those are some scary thoughts,and it's easier to stay busy
than it is to face them, but youknow what's scarier Spending
years of your life buildingsomething that doesn't matter to
(22:33):
you, because you were tooafraid to pause and consider
what does?
I once worked with someone whorealized that, when she finally
stopped spinning, she had beenbuilding something that she
really didn't want.
And actually I had a client aseparate client that had such a
great analogy for that.
She was like you need to stoponce in a while while you're
climbing the ladder and makesure your ladder is leaning on
(22:56):
the right building Props to you,janae.
I love that analogy.
So this client she realized shewas building a business that
she didn't want.
She had gotten so caught up inwhat she thought she was
supposed to do that she neverasked herself what she really
wanted to do.
The good news, though, is thatonce she figured that out,
(23:17):
everything got easier, and itdidn't get easy.
It got easier Because, whenyou're working on something that
really matters to you, youdon't have to force the
motivation, you don't have totrick yourself into caring.
The energy is already there, soit gets easier.
I'm going to share with you nowwhat I know that successful
(23:39):
entrepreneurs do not do.
They do not glorify exhaustion.
They don't brag about howlittle sleep they got or how
many hours they've worked.
They talk about their results.
They talk about their impact.
They talk about the problemsthey solved.
They talk about the people theyhelped.
Successful entrepreneurs areprotective of their time and
(24:00):
intentional with their energy.
They say no to goodopportunities so they can say
yes to great opportunities.
They focus on outcomes and noton activities.
Here's what's surprising.
Often they're working lesshours than the struggling
entrepreneurs who are always sobusy.
Because when you're clear onwhat matters and you focus all
(24:24):
of your energy there, you getmore done in less time.
Efficiency becomes yoursidekick.
You don't have to worry aboutwhen things are going to get
done, because you know they aregoing to get done.
So, besides just tracking andauditing your time, I also want
you to pay attention to yourenergy For those same three days
(24:47):
that you're putting things inthose buckets for important and
urgent, important but not urgentall of those buckets those same
three days.
I want you to rate your energylevel after each hour, so when
you're putting in.
During the last hour, I did X,y and Z.
Where was your energy level?
Scale of one to 10, 10 beingthe highest You're going to
(25:07):
start to notice patterns.
Certain activities are draining, even when they should be
energizing, and other thingsfill you up, even when they're
challenging.
So this information, it is likegold, because it tells you not
just where your time goes, butwhich activities are going to be
sustainable on a long-termbasis.
If you're spending most of yourtime on activities that rate
(25:31):
like four or below, you're goingto be exhausted all the time.
So this is not about workingharder.
It's about working on thingsthat energize you instead of
depleting you.
So, before we wrap up, I wantyou to just take one last little
bit of permission from me.
This is your officialpermission slip to stop wearing
busyness as a badge of honor.
(25:53):
You have permission to workfewer hours and accomplish more.
You have permission to workfewer hours and accomplish more.
You have permission to say nowithout explaining yourself.
Prioritize your peace aboveother people's urgency.
That's a really big one.
Build a business that energizesyou instead of exhausts you,
and I want you to care moreabout your results than you do
(26:14):
about being busy.
You don't need to earn theright to have boundaries.
You don't need to prove thatyou're working hard enough by
being overwhelmed.
You don't need anyone'sapproval to choose progress over
motion.
So we're going to talk moreabout this in the weeks to come.
We're actually going to speaknext time about some um,
(26:37):
expensive procrastination.
So stick around for that, and,but for now, I want you to just
sit with this question whatwould you be doing with your
time if you were not trying tolook busy?
And I want you to really thinkabout it, because that might be
the most important question youask yourself.
Your homework is those actionsteps we talked about.
(26:59):
Audit your time and audit yourenergy.
Don't try to do it perfectly.
Just start and see what youdiscover.
And remember this the goal isnot to be less busy.
The goal is to be busy withthings that actually matter.
There is a difference, and yourfuture self is counting on you
to figure out what thatdifference looks like for you.
(27:20):
So until next time, take careof yourself, take care of each
other, use this information tostop spinning and create your
day in the best way possible.
There is something out thereright now just waiting for you
to build it, and you have to befocused on the right things in
order to make that happen.
Have a great one, everyone.
(27:41):
See you next week.
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