The Brutal Truths of Psychology

Media Links

• Website: delvepsych.com

• Instagram: @delvepsychchicago

• YouTube: Delve Psych Channel

• Substack: delvepsych.substack.com

Hosts

• Ali McGarel, Staff Therapist at Delve Psychotherapy of Chicago

• Adam Fominaya, Executive and Clinical Director at Delve Psychotherapy of Chicago

Guests

• None this episode

In this conversation, Ali and Adam break down four “brutal truths of psychology” that recently circulated on social media. Using their clinical knowledge and real-world therapeutic experience, they explore how these truths intersect with identity, emotional life, and the stories we tell ourselves. They also highlight the nuance often missing from popularized versions of psychology, bringing in deeper theoretical and clinical perspectives.

The episode closes with a reflection on boredom, stability, and Adam’s now-famous phrase: “Sometimes it’s Thursday.”

• Introduction – Ali and Adam welcome listeners back, explain their ad-free mission, and encourage sharing.

• Truth #1: You are not a passive observer of reality – The brain as narrator, the impact of filters and biases, and how locus of responsibility shapes our interpretation of events.

• Truth #2: What you avoid controls you – Why avoidance strengthens shame and resentment, how to face discomfort, and the neurological pathways between feelings, planning, and action.

• Truth #3: You are not who you think you are – Identity as fluid and shaped by habits, feedback, and relationships; discussion of symbolic self-completion, multiple selves, and the tension between idealized, feared, and realized selves.

• Truth #4: You are wired for emotion but built to regulate it – A debate on the term “regulation,” the difference between reacting vs. responding, and strategies for holding emotions without being hijacked by them.

• Closing Reflections – Why mundane moments (like boredom in relationships) can signal stability, and how “Sometimes it’s Thursday” became a grounding metaphor.

• Vintage Block YouTube Channel – where the AI’s “brutal truths” were posted.

• Internal Family Systems (IFS) model of multiple selves.

• Freud’s structural model (id, ego, superego).

• Self-determination theory (Deci & Ryan).

• Symbolic Self-Completion (Wicklund & Gollwitzer).

• Charles Cooley’s Looking Glass Self.

• Les Greenberg – Emotion-Focused Therapy.

• Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That?

ParticipantsOverview of Big IdeasBreakdown of SegmentsReferences