February 14, 2024 • 47 mins
In this captivating episode of The Dental Wealth Nation Show, host Tim McNeely welcomes renowned guest Martin Mendelson for an in-depth exploration of the transformative power of optimism in dental practice management. Together, they delve into how a positive mindset can dramatically improve communication, production, and team dynamics within the dental industry.
Martin Mendelson, equipped with a wealth of experience in overcoming adversity in his own dental career, shares his inspirational journey towards an optimistic outlook. He and Tim discuss actionable strategies that dental professionals can use to foster gratitude and positivity in both their personal and professional lives. This conversation uncovers how narrative creation and cognitive behavioral therapy can reshape your thinking, boosting your resilience and ability to handle day-to-day challenges in the dental field.
Listeners will discover the profound impact that gratitude can have on brain function, including startling scientific evidence and real-life examples of how happiness enhances cognitive processes. Martin provides insights into combating the higher incidence of anxiety and depression faced by dental practitioners, emphasizing the need for an emotional and communication alliance within the team. By focusing on TEAM – thoughts, emotions, actions, manifestations – Martin decodes the cycle that leads to positive outcomes.
The episode also pinpoints the dangers of toxic positivity, advocating for a balanced approach that honors all emotions while maintaining an overall positive worldview. Tim and Martin outline the benefits of leveraging community support, practicing dental dualism, and the various aspects of positive psychology that can be integrated into daily dental practice.
For listeners looking to implement these concepts, Martin discusses avenues for further engagement, such as individual coaching, team workshops, and opportunities to hear him speak at events. The conversation wraps up with a powerful message on the significance of being present and choosing positivity every step of the way.
Tune in to The Dental Wealth Nation Show, where Tim McNeely and guest Martin Mendelson empower you with the wisdom to transform your dental practice through optimism, gratitude, and effective communication strategies. Whether you're a dentist, a dental team member, or simply someone passionate about personal development, this episode is a must-listen for those seeking to cultivate a wealth of wellness in their lives.
Discussion Questions:- How does Martin Mendelson define optimism, and why does he consider it crucial in the dental profession?
- Can you share an instance from your practice where a shift towards positivity altered the outcome of a patient's experience or team dynamics?
- Martin talks about the impact of gratitude on our perspective. How do you think an attitude of gratitude can specifically benefit dental practices and patient care?
- How do negative thought patterns affect team cohesion and productivity in a dental office setting? In the episode, Martin mentions the concept of dental dualism.
- How do you balance the importance of both interpersonal skills and clinical proficiency in your practice?
- Can you discuss the TEAM model in more depth? How can this model be applied daily by dental professionals to enhance their practice?
- Martin warns against toxic positivity. How can dental practitioners ensure they maintain a balance between positivity and realism when dealing with their patients and teams?
- How can dental professionals leverage the alliance framework to address the higher incidence of anxiety and depression within the profession?
- Discuss the potential long-term impacts of adopting Martin Mendelson's strategies on the overall health and success of dental practices.
- Finally, reflecting on the episode, what are some con
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
As a driven dentist, you see the world differently where some
see scarcity. You see abundance. When others wanna give
up, you keep going. You're building an amazing life
of significance. That means you can't rely
I
(00:24):
Earth so you can take even better care of the people you love, the
causes you care about, and make your dent in the universe.
But the fact is This advice remains hidden because
relatively few professionals are well versed in them, and the extremely
affluent don't care to let to know about them. Join
us as we pull back the curtain to reveal the often hidden
(00:47):
advice and strategies used by today's most successful
individuals, and families. Welcome to Dental
Wealth Nation. Here's your host, Tim McNealy.
Hey. Welcome everyone to another edition of Dental Wealth
Nation. I don't know about you, but sometimes It feels like the
(01:09):
world keeps tossing things at me, and and they're not always things that I want.
And and somehow my brain tends to focus on The things that don't
go well and the things that go wrong. And and that's why I'm so
excited about today is because by the time we finish today, You're
gonna know what science. That's right. What science has to say about how you
can engage with the world around you. You're gonna have an understanding
(01:32):
of why gratitude matters So much not just for your personal life, but
your professional life as well. And you're gonna feel empowered to take
the 1st steps And move towards even more gratitude in your life, and
you're gonna see the amazing results that it can deliver. And I'm
so excited to have Martin r Mendelsohn here today, and and what I love
about Martin is, Martin, just like you, has gone through some really
(01:55):
rough spots in life. He says Things ripped Nation, and he's learned how to chart
a new path. And he helps you use the science of
of optimism to achieve your strategic
goals. Martin, welcome to the show. Thank you so much. It's it's really
an honor. I'm excited for this conversation. Thanks for having me.
Oh, right. And We'll just start off with some gratitude. Right? Like, I I
(02:17):
really am grateful you're here, and and gratitude plays a
massive role in how we view the Wealth, doesn't it?
Absolutely. Gratitude can really truly change
everything, and there's science behind this. And There's
been so many years in my life where I've had things happen to me, like
having my entire career ripped away from me, seemingly overnight,
(02:39):
where I had to find little bits of gratitude each and every
day because I became disabled from clinical practice in 2003,
and I was out of work for 17 months. And so let let's
remember what was going on in 2003. There was no Internet. There was no smartphone.
So I had to find a job The old fashioned way, so to
speak, when I was just a dentist, too young for some
(03:02):
stuff, too old for other stuff, Too experienced for some things, too
inexperienced for other things. And I remember those days as a song by
Heather Small. I think she covered it actually. What would you do today to make
yourself feel proud? And so in those days, I would grab on to
just even one thing I did To bring my life forward
without judgment, and that was actually the
(03:24):
start, looking back now, of my practice of gratitude to
to focus differently to drive different results.
Wow. Because, I mean, you you've been involved in dental practices since, what,
about 16 is is my understanding, Steve. Yeah. I I say
from the stage as a joke that, I started at 16. They made me
wear white pants. They forced me even after Labor Day and
(03:47):
which usually gets a lot. And yeah. So my
entire life minus 3 months when I ask people if they want Thrive
with that. Has been within the confines of dentistry.
And so when I was in my mid thirties and had clinical practice ripped away
from me, You know, that that's not only is that a hard pill to
swallow well, let let's rephrase. That's a hard pill to swallow in
(04:09):
any Aspect of your life. I remember back in those days
not wanting to go to social events and parties because you know what people say,
especially in the United States, what do you do for a living? And so it
was like, I'm a dentist. Where's your practice? Well, I don't practice. Why don't
you practice? So Mhmm. Yeah. It's It when
when something becomes part of your identity or let me rephrase.
(04:30):
When we choose to make it part of our identity, When that
then goes away, we have a a challenging time to accept it.
Yeah. So right. So how did You start working through this, right, from
from, you know, literally, like, growing up in dental practices and
then, you know, kind of having your We're ripped away from you, and
and now, right, you're one of the leading voices out there when it comes to
(04:53):
optimism. And so, what how has that Journey Nation place
for you, and how has these experiences really shaped your approach
to what you do? Well, you know, we were talking earlier about the the
the iceberg illusion, how Everybody just sees the stuff above the
waterline, and the fact of the matter is it's been
a 20 year journey. Out of work for 17 months, worked
(05:15):
for a dental lab. A bigger lab bought them, and I got let go
and then ended up working for VIDA in North America and then Came to Spear
Education, almost 13 years ago. I'm still a very proud member
of the resident faculty there at Spear. Love the good work that we do there,
but it It really was a journey, and like many
life's journeys, I didn't start out to be sitting
(05:37):
here talking to you today. It was 2015.
I I have to credit Kaleem Manji, who was our CEO of Spirit at the
time. He showed Sean, of course, TED talk in a town hall meeting,
about the happiness advantage. And I picked up that book, literally
ordered it that minute, Read that book cover to cover, which by the way
has more scientific references than pages and is one of the most funny
(06:01):
reads of that kind of book I've ever read. And that
started me on this whole journey of sobriety, of
coaching, then, happiness studies, Then
team facilitation, emotional intelligence facilitation. It it
just became my life's work through
Looking to improve myself and just change the narrative that
(06:24):
was my life at the time. Wealth so, right, Changing the
the narrative, right, is something I think that's so important that a lot of us
miss. And and I've already heard you dabble these things in. Right? Whether
we're Choosing the identity to Yeah. Of our professions
or or the narrative that around Wealth. What what is the narrative
that that most people have running through their mind on a day to day
(06:46):
basis. So here's the scary thing. According to Nation Science Foundation, we have
about 50,000 thoughts that run through our noggins per day.
70 to 80% of those are negative, and 95% of those are
repetitive. So we keep telling ourselves the same
story over and over and over again. And so what I often talk
about at this point in any conversation is, I ask
(07:08):
everyone listening to think back the last time you bought a new car. And you
start driving around town. What do you start to notice? All the same or similar
make and model vehicles that magically appeared out of nowhere. That
isn't what happened. They didn't appear out of nowhere. There's a name for it. It's
called the Baader Meinhof phenomenon or frequency bias. The point
is is that what we are focused on is what we will see.
(07:30):
As doctor Spear has said for years in seminars and workshops,
When people get frustrated about certain patients not being interested in
comprehensive care, he's looked at the audience for decades and said, are all
patients not interested in comprehensive care, Or are some patients not
interested in comprehensive care? So you can choose who you focus
on, and what you focus on, You will end
(07:53):
up manifesting in your life, period. Wow. So so out of
those 50,000 thoughts a day, the the vast majority of them are
are negative or Tim some form. Yep.
Wow. And so what how do we start
combating this? How how do we start creating space to to To tell
ourselves a different story. Sure. Well, first of all, it's
(08:15):
a journey, and it's a skill. And
I I I often talk about because most of our
audience here is dentists or dental professionals. Right? So I often
talk about this idea of Dental dualism. And dental
dualism is this idea that we as clinicians and anybody within our
profession gives a great deal of respect
(08:38):
To the time, effort, and consistency
required to gain a clinical hand or
administrative skill, Yet we don't do that to the
verbal or mental skills. But they're skills. They're just
different skills. And so The
truth of the matter is it is
(09:00):
acceptance that this is real, And it
is bringing in even certain elements
of optimism through consistency that
That can yield results. So let me give you an example. Most
practices have something they call a morning huddle or we at Spear call a
perfect day meeting. I would certainly hope, a, you're doing those.
(09:22):
But, b, I would also hope that part of that meeting is not
simply Exceptions, anticipated challenges, or
problems. Those are important to talk about,
in in the appropriate context. However, If that's how we start
our day every single day, what are we gonna be looking for all day, every
single day? Exceptions, challenges, and problems.
(09:44):
What if we could just make a simple start
to talk about something we're grateful for that happened yesterday? And
by the way, The research is very clear. It doesn't need to be
something monumental. It could be something really simple, and it
could be something personal too. A team member might say I'm really happy. I I
came home, and my spouse brought me home their extra cookie from lunch.
(10:06):
Like, that generates positivity. That causes
The positive chemicals in our brain that start flowing around that can
start to change the narrative of how we see our lives every single day.
Wow. And you're so right. This is a journey. I mean, this is something
my my wife and I have learned how to do over the years too is
just the The practicing gratitude, and and it was interesting. When
(10:28):
when we first started, sometimes, like, my gratitude was, I am glad
I never have to do this day over Like like, it literally was that simple.
It's like, today sucked. It was awful. Yeah. And I never have to do
this day. I'll I'll have to do another form of it, but, like, this day,
never again. And through that process and this has
been, like I said, a long journey, that all of a sudden we found
(10:50):
ourselves on the couch over New Year's. And instead of
my mind going to everything I didn't get done last year, I
finished, and my wife looked at me with astonishment. And she said, you
realize, like, you just gave me 75 or 80 things that
went really well last year. Absolutely. And, like, And that was a new
thing for us, and we've had to work to get there because if you'd known
(11:12):
me a decade ago, it was all negative. And so So so what you're
talking about is so important, but once again, I I I think it's
hard for us to embrace that. And and you mentioned especially with With what
we invest in. Right? We'll invest in our clinical skills or our business skills, but
we don't take the time and effort to to invest in the the skill of
optimist. Absolutely. And I think this would be a good
(11:34):
point to put a pin in the idea of toxic
positivity. Because oftentimes, The minute we start talking about
happiness or optimism, people bring in that phrase into the
conversation. So toxic positivity
is only ever looking at the bright side. That is not how I live my
life. Toxic positivity is classically
(11:56):
described in the catchphrase that's on t shirts and hats, good vibes
only. Life isn't about good vibes only, ladies and gentlemen. Sorry to
break it to you. And so happiness is a comparative
Nation. And so we cannot know happiness
without knowing sadness and sorrow. One of
my favorite books is by doctor Viktor Frankl, Man's Search For
(12:19):
Meaning. He's a noted neurologist, psychiatrist, and a
holocaust survivor. He survived the horrors of Auschwitz
to then be a beacon in the world to say there is
always hope in the darkness. And one of the quotes that I often
use in in my teachings, in my lectures, in my workshops is
between stimulus and response, there's a space. And in
(12:41):
that space lies our freedom to choose our response. And in
our response lies our growth and our freedom. So it's not about
what life deals you. It's about how you
respond to what life deals you. End of story.
Interesting. Now the this Toxic positivity. I don't I don't know that I've heard that
term before, and I and I think that that's interesting. So so how
(13:04):
do we bring that into our our morning meetings And and make
sure we're actually really practicing those those gratitudes and optimism
and not just falling into a toxic positivity. Absolutely. I that's
a great question. So another phrase that certain people
think is toxic when it's used,
individually is the phrase everything happens for a reason.
(13:26):
I don't use it in a solo form like or an isolated
form like that. The way I use it is everything happens for a reason.
This stinks, or other words, you can choose. I'm gonna
be mad about it. I'm gonna let my emotions flow through and flow past
me, and then I'm gonna focus on What did
this situation teach me about
(13:49):
this occurrence, this person, this reality
of life? So what you're doing is you're acknowledging the negative,
you're allowing the negative to flow through you, then you're turning your
lens on, How can I be a better person from this? What can I learn
from this? What can I gain from this? And then you start to focus
on The the difference is imp impossibility.
(14:12):
Doctor Barbara Fredrickson, wrote a paper and coined, the
broaden and build theory. And, Basically, I'm summarizing
where these positive thought repertoires in
repetition Allow us to broaden our
ability to see things differently, and it even
(14:32):
creates new neuronal connections in our brain that we can then go back to
later when things get difficult. So there's
a physiologic element to this as well,
within the body of the positive psychology Literature. Wow.
So so we're we're actually transforming our brains through through doing
this and creating new neuro connections Yep. So that all of a sudden
(14:54):
it becomes easier to to recognize and be Tim
instead of focusing on everything that's going wrong. Yes.
Wow. That that is so fascinating. Now, you know, you also talk a
little bit about a team concept. Right? Thoughts, emotions, actions, and
that leading to manifestations. Can you Absolutely. Delve a little deeper into
that that model and how we might use that to to really create a
(15:17):
culture of optimism? Sure. This is an adaptation of a model
of 2 of my friends and mentors, Jen Barley and Karen Sullivan.
And it it's Understanding the reality that
everything in life that happens is Dental, going along with Viktor Frankl and
others' works. It's our thought that gives power to that situation
that drives an emotion, that drives then therefore an action, that then
(15:40):
therefore manifest results. So here's the example I give from from the
podium What I'm doing keynotes. I ask everybody
to think about their dearest friend that they don't live with.
K? And so I usually ask somebody to say, give
me the name. You know? So let's let's say it's Johnny. And so
If we're there on a given Wednesday, I said, okay, everybody. We're gonna put
(16:03):
care and concern about Johnny in a little box. We're gonna close the cover of
the box. We're gonna put it over here. K? So
it's a Wednesday. Let's pretend. And you texted
Johnny, said dear friend, last Wednesday, and you haven't heard back from him.
So barring Nation concern, what might you be thinking about Johnny? Well,
(16:23):
who does he think he is? At least too busy to Text me back or
maybe, oh, I saw him go out with the Joneses on Facebook. He wasn't too
busy to go out with them, but he's too busy to text me back. What
kind of emotions does that drive? Anger? Frustration? What kind of
actions does that drive? Well, it kinda depends on the kind of person you are.
You might send Tim an angry text, a passive aggressive text, or if you're really
(16:45):
analytical, maybe you'll wait the exact same number of days it took him to
text you back Until you text him back. But see,
this game, this this example, I tricked everyone who thought
of said dear friend because How do those actions manifest
the maintenance and and continuation of said dear friendship?
They don't. So now let's take care and compassion
(17:08):
out of the box. K? Now you found out, gosh
forbid, that something happened to Johnny. Now what are your
thoughts? Oh my gosh. What can I do? How can I help? What does he
need? What are your emotions? Care, love, compassion. What are your
actions? Well, it depends. You know, DoorDash dinner, take care of their
kids or pets, whatever. You get the idea. And how does that manifest
(17:30):
in maintaining or growing the friendship? Well, that's a different thing. And what's the
only thing that changed? You're sitting in Viktor
Frankl's space and you're making stuff up
Versus thinking toward a positive
outcome. Because the truth is
The positive future is just as valid as the negative future
(17:53):
because neither has happened yet. Wow. So this is the cost
of sitting in the negative. Yeah. Well and it goes back to that narrative, that
story that we're telling ourselves. Right? What what's the narrative you're sitting
with with these things? Yeah. Yeah. That's interesting. Do
you find a lot of that that narrative creation happens with the
unknown situations and things? Right. Something happens, and we
(18:15):
we have an unknown outcome, and so we're more negative to or or more apt
to write a negative outcome instead of a positive outcome for that story.
I do believe that life experience and
life itself plays a huge role in this,
in in the narrative as as you asked. And we need
to give that grace and understanding because we're humans. And when
(18:37):
negative things happen, That stinks. Like, let's just call it what it is.
And it can be exceedingly frustrating, and
it it doesn't make it any better. One of the,
Hallmark Nation principles in my original coaching program was this concept
of assumption. And that, You
know, we can never assume that something's gonna happen in the exact same
(18:59):
way that happened before unless all of the factors
that were there before are present today.
So let me give a real life example within dentistry.
Staff Tim members are hard to find these days. Everyone's challenged
with with, having a full a full team. And
so there are a lot of individuals that have,
(19:22):
applied for jobs, set up interviews, come in for interviews,
and then ghost. They just disappear. And
so it's understandable that leaders within practices can
get jaded. However, let's flip the equation.
Let's pretend now that you're the the next candidate,
and they're aware that your thought process is well, you know,
(19:45):
I just interviewed 3 other people. They all ghosted. They didn't work out. This
person probably just like everybody else. I'm not even gonna, you know, get my
hopes up that they're good. Like, how do you think that person would
feel? Yeah. It's a interesting example if
you think about it. To flip the Narrative and and have the
other person hear it. All of a sudden, it takes on a different context.
(20:08):
Yeah. Oh my gosh. Wow. How how powerful. And, right, and
and this has real life implications in in our professional and personal
lives too, doesn't it? Oh, a 100%. A 100%. Let's
say, You know, in that in that same situation with Johnny
and and texting, let's say you come at them and and you send
them a nasty text, And then you find out something
(20:30):
terrible happened, and they get all upset with you
that you didn't have the grace To to give them a little slack and
depending on the individual and the relationship, it it might ruin the
relationship forever because of an assumption, because of the,
living in a space and and jumping to conclusions, or as I like to call
it, jumping to catastrophe. Depending on the
(20:52):
situation. Oh my gosh. I I love that. Yes. I I think a lot of
us are guilty of, jumping to to catastrophe. And so Yeah. You
know, we're we're talking about this this Optimistic mindset and and really
changing the narrative and and practicing gratitude and the
science behind it. And And, right, how does an optimistic
mindset how does that influence what goes on in the dental practice? Does
(21:14):
it does it influence how we're gonna do treatment planning? Does it
Ultimately impact how we deal with our staff, and and does it impact the financial
success we may even have? Yes. Yes. Yes. And yes.
And in fact, I invite everybody. January's edition of
Dental Economics. I have a featured cover article on this topic. 10
or 11 different scientific references, some of which I'll share right now,
(21:36):
but it's on page 10. It's the culture edition, of dental
economics. And so the answer is absolutely yes. So
let me give you a couple of small examples. It actually
influences Our brain function. So Brian
conducted a study, doctor Brian, with school children.
He went into a schoolhouse, And these kids were about to take
(22:00):
a standardized math test. He split them in 2. In each group,
they had high, middle, and low academic performers. 1 group just
simply took the exam. The other group were part of
a facilitated discussion that went something like this. Of course, I'm
paraphrasing. We wanna talk about the happiest day in your lives. What
did you do? Who were you with? How fun was it? What did you
(22:22):
experience? Blah blah blah. Okay. Great. Thank you. Now go
take your exam. They blew the doors off the other group.
I'll give you another example. Schmidt's. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait.
Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait.
Go back to that one. You're telling me you're telling me, like, just
(22:42):
the the very act they write same test. They split the kids up. Yeah. They
asked 1 group, like, just Tell us about a happy day in your happiest day
of your life. Yeah. And those kids, like, did so much better on the test
than the other group. A 100%. Let's, now
I'm about to blow your mind because I was gonna tell you about Schmidt's, which
I can, but let's talk about Estrada's work. Because We're
(23:03):
we're now gonna go to the opposite extreme. Let's talk about
physicians. Mhmm. So Estrada was looking to investigate
how positivity Influence diagnosis
and anchoring. So anchoring for those who may not be too familiar with the term,
that's when you get literally stuck or anchored To a
differential diagnosis, a hypothesis, or an idea despite
(23:26):
other facts coming to your knowledge. K.
So he worked with these physicians, and he gave them
medical information to read, to come to a diagnosis, And they were timed.
There was no time limit, but they were timed. So there were 3
groups. The control group, just simply given the information.
The neutral group, They were asked to read what was deemed
(23:48):
either negative or or positive medical information before
the information containing in the study. And then the
group Thrive to be happy, which I'll share with you in a second.
The physicians primed to be happy Came to a
diagnosis 20% of the way through the material, twice as fast as the
other 2 groups with 2 and a half times less anchoring
(24:10):
exhibited. And here's why this is so important.
Do you know how they're trying to be happy? With candy. Not
the actual eating of candy that could mess with their blood sugar, but simply
as I read the study, here doctor, here's some candy. You can eat this when
you're done. So here's the point, and this goes back to this
whole toxic positivity stuff, etcetera, etcetera. Small jolts of
(24:33):
positivity matter And can have influence and
influence how our brain literally functions. So,
yeah, it's that important To diagnose the student planning and
practice success. Period. My gosh. Well and and these are things, right,
we can weave into the conversations as you're seeing your patients, as you're
talking to your staff. Right? It can be, right, as simple as, you know,
(24:56):
like, right, bringing an example up for the patient to help them
practice Gratitudes. Well, they're in your chair. Right? You can do this without them even
being aware of it. A 100%. Yeah. A 100%. And
look, You know, I I'm very close friends with doctor Kyle
Stanley, and and we work together. And I know we're gonna talk a little bit
about what he and I are doing a little bit later, but He he's he's
(25:17):
one of the other giants in dentistry talking about mental health for dentists
and burnout, and he has a fantastic course called the mentally resilient
dentist. But But the reason why he comes to my mind right now and right
here is because he talks about how we operate in an environment of fear,
where the patients that are coming to us are coming with their prior dental
experience. They're afraid. The the data on phobia is very
(25:39):
clear. The data on phobia of the injection is very, very
clear. There's data that that shows or research that shows
that when we give local anesthesia, our blood pressure goes up due
to empathy. So helping our patients
kinda work through that prior dental anxiety
and and acknowledging it, Not not moving past it. Like, when I
(26:01):
work with teams all the time, particularly on listening skills,
if a patient sits there and says, you know, I'm really, really nervous about this
Filling this root canal, this extraction. Oh, you
know, doctor Jones is really wonderful. You have nothing to worry about. You
didn't acknowledge them at all. And so
we're also negating their concerns. Right? So this this kinda
(26:24):
goes back to what we said before. Happiness is a comparative emotion. We gotta
work through that negativity to get to the other side of positivity.
Wow. Now, you know, as you were talking about that, right, I I I
wonder about different career paths for for people in different industries.
And And, Ray, as we're talking about this, it it really feels
like some industries are are more prone to to
(26:47):
really benefit from the Science of optimism and and from the
science of gratitude and and helping people work through things. Right?
Because especially Right? You've got that caregiver fatigue. You've got
the empathy piece, and it's it's a lot harder on a lot of us to
go through these things than, You know, there there may
be some other profession out there. So so have you found some industries
(27:09):
really suffer a lot more than others when it comes Science
in what you're doing? Sean Accor actually talks about it in the happiness advance
relative to our attorney colleagues, because
they're actually trained to look for inconsistency and error.
Mhmm. And so for some individuals in their personal lives, they can't turn it
off. Mhmm. And so although, yes, dentistry has a very
(27:31):
significantly Higher incidence of suicide than the general populace.
It's my understanding, and I I don't have the data on this. It's my understanding
that, Attorneys have as high, if not higher of a
suicide rate than even dentists do. Okay. But
the the research is clear on dentists. It was The JADA study
from 2015, we have two and a half times the incidence of
(27:53):
the general population of anxiety disorder, depression, and panic
disorder. Two times. Wow. And it has a lot to do with all the
things Kyle talks about, environment of fear, media betrayal,
all these, you know, physical,
Challenge of what it is we do because it's so taxing on our bodies. It's
the list goes on and on. Wow. Okay. Yeah. No. That that's fascinating. And I
(28:16):
think especially the attorney piece. Right? That that makes a lot of sense because they
are. There's they're they're trained to spot those inconsistencies.
That's what they do for a living. Exactly. You know, it it sounds
like we do have some solutions here. Right? Some science backed solutions
to to really help dentists and other professionals move forward.
But, you know, I don't know that we see a lot of this conversation going
(28:38):
on. I I think we have more of it, but it still doesn't feel very
widespread. Why do you think that we really have some of these barriers
to to people being willing to invest in this the same way we
might invest in a business coach or a mastermind group or a New piece
of equipment for our office. I think within dentistry
itself, my observation is that
(29:00):
If we if we we're we're so trained to work in millimeters and
and be so exacting that if we can't put our fingers on something
absolutely exacting, thing, then it's not as valuable.
However, the the data we just talked about, anxiety,
depression, and panic disorder speak for itself. You talk to most dentists
and you ask them, what's your most challenging part of dental practice? They're not gonna
(29:23):
say clinical. They're gonna say managing the team.
And My perspective, my personal perspective,
having worked with technically thousands of offices on the phone
And, 100 in person
is that we don't give enough gravitas
(29:43):
To the true reality that there can be a gap in
life experience between doctor and team. That's not criticism.
That's not a judgment. That's just the way it is. And
so what gets us leaders into trouble
In in many instances is that we expect
(30:04):
our teams to engage, interact, and
interpret Situations and reality is
the way we do, and they don't. And
so what can we do about it? Well, From
my part of it, what I very firmly believe is that
if we can establish a communication alliance,
(30:26):
which is part of the work I do, So that we can sit down and
we can talk about what kind of practice do we wanna show up to every
day, what are the words that or phrases that exemplify that,
How do we wanna show up when there are challenges? So maybe words would be,
like, open minded or with kindness or with patience. And how do
we wanna keep each other accountable, You know, with grace, etcetera, and
(30:48):
sometimes the words overlap, then we have a place to
start from. And and if we can get the team to acknowledge regardless
of How many years they've been in dentistry, what their backgrounds are, it doesn't matter.
If we can get everybody agree that this is the alliance we're gonna live by,
we're gonna have a safe word. Most of them pick pineapple. Don't ask me
why. And, then it gives us an opportunity in the
(31:10):
appropriate time, of course, never in front of a patient, To to
then to to wave the white flag and say,
hey. I have concerns about what's going on here. If we could do
even just that, That changes the face
of an entire practice, and and I've seen it over and over again.
Wow. That that's so powerful. And, Right. You're talking about alliance.
(31:33):
Right? That starts to bring up the ideas to me at least of of
collaboration, of community, of having support of others. And
I know that's something you often emphasize is, right, just the importance
of not going it alone and and the value of con
of that community support. And so, You know, with those alliances, is
that one of the ways that they can leverage their their team for growth
(31:55):
and success, and are there some other ways that they can Really leverage the
the community in in collaboration for further success.
Yeah. So the the alliance is a big part. The
Just simply the discussion that we don't all
necessarily see things the same way can can really blow
doors down, for many practices
(32:18):
because I I haven't been to a practice
yet where somebody within the team, doesn't matter who,
Or or the doctor. Right? When I say team, I mean everybody. Is
looking at things a certain way that they had never verbalized before.
And so just simply the acknowledgement that, oh,
maybe my interpretation of x, y, or z may not
(32:41):
really be What's going on? You know?
Maybe this individual team member's gruff
Hello. Good morning had more to do with the fact that their mom is ill
Mhmm. Than it does you. And so when we
can Kinda lift ourselves out of that
(33:02):
space, Viktor Frankl's space. That alone
Can can change the dynamic, and and that's not enough
because that's just the first step In many
ways or or part of the first stage. Mhmm. Once
we acknowledge that and we're willing to work through it, then we can
have further discussions around, you know, how do we wanna engage with each other?
(33:25):
What am I committed to doing more of, doing less of,
Stopping or starting. And and we can
have all those really fantastical discussions, But we're not
gonna get there unless we acknowledge the fact that
everything that we typically are driving toward as a result in
a dental practice, Production, communication,
(33:48):
teamwork, problem solving, strategic
planning, those are all results. Those are all
results of actually interacting with each other. And unless we're actually
interacting with each other on even partially and even plain
communication wise, We don't have a hope of taking the
practice to a different level because we're always gonna get stuck Wow.
(34:10):
Between them. Oh my gosh. How powerful. And I know
this this alliance framework is something that you teach and you help
practices implement. And, You know, what are what
are some common transformations and results that you start to see in the
the teams when you go in there and you start Implementing this alliance framework
and the and the team really starts communicating and working together.
(34:32):
What do you start to see happen in the practices? Great question.
Lots of fun stuff, to be honest with you. It's, I've
heard all different kinds of positive
movements, many of which start Almost immediately, which would
make sense. Right? Because you you just did the workshop on a Friday. Now we're
back on Monday, and it's fresh in your mind. And
(34:55):
I've had reports of teams where 2 team members
were starting to have a discussion. I'll put that in air quotes. And
a 3rd team member witnesses it, came up and said, pineapple.
Next thing you know, it stopped everybody in their tracks, and they're like, what do
you mean? And they're like, Let's talk about this. And it allowed them to move
through things in a better and different way. I have
(35:17):
a practice I just worked with in, Fresno just a couple weeks
ago, and they've engaged their safe word a couple times over a
specific Nation, and they're making progress.
So It's really neat to see
the self managed
Movement on the part of the team that takes accountability, that takes
(35:39):
leadership, ownership to not only their own
behaviors, but the behaviors of others To drive what it is
everybody agreed they wanted to do to begin with, which for almost all of
us is excellent patient care. At least I would hope. Yeah.
So that's Wealth we're driving toward. Wow. Right now now
right. It's such a powerful story. Right? And I love that. Right? Just
(36:01):
driving communication so that you can Serve your patients better and actually
even have more fun and enjoy what you do. And, and, you
know, management techniques, those Come and go. Right? There's always a new
management technique, always a new strategy or tactic. And so so
why do you think this really differs than Dentist some management technique
coming Right? What what actually makes this different?
(36:23):
Because it's not a technique. It's a
way of managing through your day. You know, whether
it's my my team framework, my mentor's TFAR
framework, thoughts, feelings, actions, results, Oh,
it's all based in cognitive behavioral therapy. And so it's all
based on challenging assumption to move
(36:45):
yourself forward. You know, I I've
had it it it's it's an
often talked about reality of today of ghosting
in the personal space and the workplace. In fact,
Simon Sinek has a fantastic short video on ghosting I
recommend everybody watch. It took me a long
(37:07):
time to get over the fact that it wasn't about
me. And I've had career making
opportunities come to me after
following up for several years
and not making it about me. And what I mean by this
is, you know, an unanswered Communications,
(37:30):
text, emails, etcetera. If I made it about me,
I wouldn't have sent the next text. I wouldn't have sent the next
email. Now understand, these aren't cold emails.
These aren't cold phone calls. These are warm interactions. These are
interactions where we've had discussions that we wanna move forward.
And so if I allowed my space to be
(37:53):
clouded by negative assumption, I we
wouldn't even be sitting here today Talk about this stuff. Wow.
I and and so do you see this kind of this new way of moving
forward, right, the really kinda pushing through In
embracing the the science of optimism, do you see this really
kinda starting to fit into the evolving landscape of dental practices, and
(38:16):
do you see this being Part of the the future of of practice management?
I believe the answer wholeheartedly is yes. And
COVID was a terrible part part of our
history. However, What it yielded
was an awareness within dentistry that, Houston,
(38:37):
we got a problem. And it shown light
on a lot of these challenges, these psychological challenges.
And so I do believe this kind of thing is gonna continue.
I think I I have personal evidence of it. I just gave
a keynote to a subsidiary of UnitedHealthcare. They're not even in
dentistry. This is a $500,000,000 plus company a year. Little old me
(39:00):
was talking about using optimism to achieve strategic
goals of this massive corporation.
I'm not at liberty to say yet, but I'm gonna be speaking at the
sales meeting of one of the largest dental companies in the world
at to their sales team. And so
The if if the corporate and DSOs too, I'm in discussions with
(39:23):
DSOs. If these entities are identifying this as something
that's gonna help drive the bottom line, I think the solo and
or the small group practitioner needs to listen.
Wow. How powerful. And, And so how do you typically engage with
these organizations? Is it through workshops, individual coaching? Right? How
can we engage with you if we're interested in exploring How to
(39:46):
build this into our practices and our lives? Absolutely. It
like any business like mine, it it runs the gamut.
And so When I say it runs the gamut, it has everything to
do with need because I have certain skills, abilities, and and
and instruments that I can deploy
Based on need. So for some individuals, they enter through,
(40:09):
just individual 1 on 1 coaching first. Some
individuals want me to come into their team and then follow-up with with
1 on 1 coaching. Then on the corporate or DSO side,
I have these entities that are saying we want you as a keynote or a
webinar to kinda set the tone,
The knowledge, the nomenclature to then move forward. So what I've
(40:31):
done is on my website, which is just my name, martin
Mendelson dot com, I have all of those kinda spread
out into tabs with, testimonials of
individuals I've worked with. I have a A full speaker kit with all of
my, subjects in there as well as the
workshops, and it's all there on the website, as a one stop
(40:53):
shop for people to kinda dig their teeth into. What what does this really mean?
What does this really look like? Awesome. Yeah. And I put a a link down
below for everyone to Martin's website. I'd encourage you to check it out. One of
my favorite sections on there is the books you love. Right? The the resources
that are there for for us to continue to engage, to learn, to grow.
And so why, Your your website isn't just about you. Right? It's a a
(41:15):
resource for us to learn also, which is Absolutely. Wonderful.
Absolutely. And it's it's It's so fun to also highlight authors that I
happen to know personally that have written pretty amazing groundbreaking
books. And, doctor Tal Ben Shahar, who,
is Harvard trained, and he gained,
notoriety and attention a number of years ago When the Boston Globe
(41:37):
did an article on Tim, he was teaching at Harvard at the time. They said,
why is why are all these Harvard students Lining up to take a course on
happiness. You know, aren't they happy there at Harvard? And so I've
had it you know, I took his course. I had the chance to interact with
him. I had a podcast for a hot minute, and, he was
gracious enough to be a guest on there. And, Sean Swarner is an
(41:58):
author who's on there that was in my coaching program, who's One of the only
individual the only individual in the world that's climbed Mount Everest with 1
lung. Talk about optimism. So there's some great
stuff on Really, really good stuff. So thank you for highlighting that. Yeah. No. I
I think it's a a great resource, and I would encourage everyone. Click click below.
Check that out. I and I think you also have some or or workshop coming
(42:20):
up at the the end of the year, I believe, November sometime.
Yeah. So I I talked about my my dear friend, doctor Kyle
Stanley. We we met, almost by accident in the middle of the
pandemic, thanks to doctor Todd Shire. And he wanna do a
Facebook live about mental health and dentistry. And Kyle has a
fantastic framework on, as I talked about earlier, the mentally resilient
(42:41):
dentist. And so what we've done is we've joined
forces. And so we take his frameworks that he teaches
within his online course, And my exercises and
my facilitation skills, and we we jokingly say we
birth this baby called Light Side Live. And so we've given light
side live several times now. We get once in Huntington Beach, once in
(43:03):
Milwaukee. And now, we
just Finished getting all of our t's crossed and i's out
yesterday. Glidewell Laboratory is allowing us
to, used their facility in November, November 1st
2nd, to host light side
live on their campus. And so, Kyle's
(43:24):
website is lightsidedentistry.com, and then there's a
tab for Light Side Live. There's so many
Video testimonials that just make me just
humble when I see them, because what we're able to
do when we come together And support each other
is like nothing I've ever seen. And and I believe we're like
(43:47):
you alluded to before, we're on the ground floor of something big, from
from what we've seen from all of these individuals. Yeah. Wow. Wealth,
hey. Thank you for being here, and thank you for sharing so generously. I I
know I certainly have a much better standing of what the science has
to say about engaging with the world Nation and certainly a much better
understanding of why gratitude matters so much and And certainly feel
(44:08):
empowered to to take those 1st steps and move towards even more gratitude
and and optimism. But before we sign off here, any closing thoughts
for us? I think that
wherever you are, whoever you are, you are right
where you're meant to be. And that might sound trite,
(44:30):
but we are all the totality of our lives experience.
And we can choose to Look back to the
past with regret. We can choose to look back to
the past with judgment, with sadness, Or we can choose
to move forward. And that's a choice that we
make every day because the the the reality is
(44:53):
All we have is the present. The past has already happened. There's nothing we
can do about it. And by the way, the future hasn't happened yet. And
so as I said earlier, looking toward the future with positivity is just as
valid as looking to the future with negativity. And by the way, When we get
to that future, that's now our present. So all we
have is the present moment. And if even after all
(45:15):
this wonderful discussion, You sit there and say, well, you know, Martin, I
still need to look toward the future with a bit of trepidation to prepare
myself. There's a difference between Saving money
for retirement and having a mindset of
negativity because the science is clear. If
we allow ourselves to make the choice to be steeped in
(45:37):
negativity, it's negativity we will see. We will not
allow our brains to be more broad to see opportunities and
possibilities, and it will ultimately impact our lives whether that
be personal or Treatment planning or
productivity within dental practices, period. So
powerful. You're right. All all we have is the the president. A good friend of
(45:59):
mine, one of the leading Geologists out there, a guy named Steven Sizzler,
really talks about you you can stare I can stare at my watch all day
long, and I'm never gonna be in the future. I'm always gonna be right now.
Yep. Right? It doesn't I I've watched my clock for 10000 hours, and I'm
still gonna be right here right now. Yep. And, so, yes, the
the the being present and and Focusing on that, I think, is so
(46:20):
important. So thank you for that reminder, Martin. Absolutely. It's
been a pleasure and an honor to Spend a little time with you and
continue to kinda get my message out there. Yeah. Excellent. And
wanna certainly support that because I think a more Tim
Wealth is a better world. So thank you for tuning in to Dental Wealth Nation.
We'll see you all here again really soon. Take care.
(46:46):
You've been listening to Dental Wealth Nation. We hope you've gotten
some useful and practical Nation the show. Join us
next time as we pull back the curtain to reveal the often
hidden advice and strategies who's by today's most successful
individuals and families, and help maximize your net
worth so you can take even better care of the people you love.
(47:08):
Till Next time, make sure to hit the website at
Nation
As a driven dentist, you see the world differently where some
see scarcity. You see abundance. When others wanna give
up, you keep going. You're building an amazing life
of significance. That means you can't rely
I
(00:24):
Earth so you can take even better care of the people you love, the
causes you care about, and make your dent in the universe.
But the fact is This advice remains hidden because
relatively few professionals are well versed in them, and the extremely
affluent don't care to let to know about them. Join
us as we pull back the curtain to reveal the often hidden
(00:47):
advice and strategies used by today's most successful
individuals, and families. Welcome to Dental
Wealth Nation. Here's your host, Tim McNealy.
Hey. Welcome everyone to another edition of Dental Wealth
Nation. I don't know about you, but sometimes It feels like the
(01:09):
world keeps tossing things at me, and and they're not always things that I want.
And and somehow my brain tends to focus on The things that don't
go well and the things that go wrong. And and that's why I'm so
excited about today is because by the time we finish today, You're
gonna know what science. That's right. What science has to say about how you
can engage with the world around you. You're gonna have an understanding
(01:32):
of why gratitude matters So much not just for your personal life, but
your professional life as well. And you're gonna feel empowered to take
the 1st steps And move towards even more gratitude in your life, and
you're gonna see the amazing results that it can deliver. And I'm
so excited to have Martin r Mendelsohn here today, and and what I love
about Martin is, Martin, just like you, has gone through some really
(01:55):
rough spots in life. He says Things ripped Nation, and he's learned how to chart
a new path. And he helps you use the science of
of optimism to achieve your strategic
goals. Martin, welcome to the show. Thank you so much. It's it's really
an honor. I'm excited for this conversation. Thanks for having me.
Oh, right. And We'll just start off with some gratitude. Right? Like, I I
(02:17):
really am grateful you're here, and and gratitude plays a
massive role in how we view the Wealth, doesn't it?
Absolutely. Gratitude can really truly change
everything, and there's science behind this. And There's
been so many years in my life where I've had things happen to me, like
having my entire career ripped away from me, seemingly overnight,
(02:39):
where I had to find little bits of gratitude each and every
day because I became disabled from clinical practice in 2003,
and I was out of work for 17 months. And so let let's
remember what was going on in 2003. There was no Internet. There was no smartphone.
So I had to find a job The old fashioned way, so to
speak, when I was just a dentist, too young for some
(03:02):
stuff, too old for other stuff, Too experienced for some things, too
inexperienced for other things. And I remember those days as a song by
Heather Small. I think she covered it actually. What would you do today to make
yourself feel proud? And so in those days, I would grab on to
just even one thing I did To bring my life forward
without judgment, and that was actually the
(03:24):
start, looking back now, of my practice of gratitude to
to focus differently to drive different results.
Wow. Because, I mean, you you've been involved in dental practices since, what,
about 16 is is my understanding, Steve. Yeah. I I say
from the stage as a joke that, I started at 16. They made me
wear white pants. They forced me even after Labor Day and
(03:47):
which usually gets a lot. And yeah. So my
entire life minus 3 months when I ask people if they want Thrive
with that. Has been within the confines of dentistry.
And so when I was in my mid thirties and had clinical practice ripped away
from me, You know, that that's not only is that a hard pill to
swallow well, let let's rephrase. That's a hard pill to swallow in
(04:09):
any Aspect of your life. I remember back in those days
not wanting to go to social events and parties because you know what people say,
especially in the United States, what do you do for a living? And so it
was like, I'm a dentist. Where's your practice? Well, I don't practice. Why don't
you practice? So Mhmm. Yeah. It's It when
when something becomes part of your identity or let me rephrase.
(04:30):
When we choose to make it part of our identity, When that
then goes away, we have a a challenging time to accept it.
Yeah. So right. So how did You start working through this, right, from
from, you know, literally, like, growing up in dental practices and
then, you know, kind of having your We're ripped away from you, and
and now, right, you're one of the leading voices out there when it comes to
(04:53):
optimism. And so, what how has that Journey Nation place
for you, and how has these experiences really shaped your approach
to what you do? Well, you know, we were talking earlier about the the
the iceberg illusion, how Everybody just sees the stuff above the
waterline, and the fact of the matter is it's been
a 20 year journey. Out of work for 17 months, worked
(05:15):
for a dental lab. A bigger lab bought them, and I got let go
and then ended up working for VIDA in North America and then Came to Spear
Education, almost 13 years ago. I'm still a very proud member
of the resident faculty there at Spear. Love the good work that we do there,
but it It really was a journey, and like many
life's journeys, I didn't start out to be sitting
(05:37):
here talking to you today. It was 2015.
I I have to credit Kaleem Manji, who was our CEO of Spirit at the
time. He showed Sean, of course, TED talk in a town hall meeting,
about the happiness advantage. And I picked up that book, literally
ordered it that minute, Read that book cover to cover, which by the way
has more scientific references than pages and is one of the most funny
(06:01):
reads of that kind of book I've ever read. And that
started me on this whole journey of sobriety, of
coaching, then, happiness studies, Then
team facilitation, emotional intelligence facilitation. It it
just became my life's work through
Looking to improve myself and just change the narrative that
(06:24):
was my life at the time. Wealth so, right, Changing the
the narrative, right, is something I think that's so important that a lot of us
miss. And and I've already heard you dabble these things in. Right? Whether
we're Choosing the identity to Yeah. Of our professions
or or the narrative that around Wealth. What what is the narrative
that that most people have running through their mind on a day to day
(06:46):
basis. So here's the scary thing. According to Nation Science Foundation, we have
about 50,000 thoughts that run through our noggins per day.
70 to 80% of those are negative, and 95% of those are
repetitive. So we keep telling ourselves the same
story over and over and over again. And so what I often talk
about at this point in any conversation is, I ask
(07:08):
everyone listening to think back the last time you bought a new car. And you
start driving around town. What do you start to notice? All the same or similar
make and model vehicles that magically appeared out of nowhere. That
isn't what happened. They didn't appear out of nowhere. There's a name for it. It's
called the Baader Meinhof phenomenon or frequency bias. The point
is is that what we are focused on is what we will see.
(07:30):
As doctor Spear has said for years in seminars and workshops,
When people get frustrated about certain patients not being interested in
comprehensive care, he's looked at the audience for decades and said, are all
patients not interested in comprehensive care, Or are some patients not
interested in comprehensive care? So you can choose who you focus
on, and what you focus on, You will end
(07:53):
up manifesting in your life, period. Wow. So so out of
those 50,000 thoughts a day, the the vast majority of them are
are negative or Tim some form. Yep.
Wow. And so what how do we start
combating this? How how do we start creating space to to To tell
ourselves a different story. Sure. Well, first of all, it's
(08:15):
a journey, and it's a skill. And
I I I often talk about because most of our
audience here is dentists or dental professionals. Right? So I often
talk about this idea of Dental dualism. And dental
dualism is this idea that we as clinicians and anybody within our
profession gives a great deal of respect
(08:38):
To the time, effort, and consistency
required to gain a clinical hand or
administrative skill, Yet we don't do that to the
verbal or mental skills. But they're skills. They're just
different skills. And so The
truth of the matter is it is
(09:00):
acceptance that this is real, And it
is bringing in even certain elements
of optimism through consistency that
That can yield results. So let me give you an example. Most
practices have something they call a morning huddle or we at Spear call a
perfect day meeting. I would certainly hope, a, you're doing those.
(09:22):
But, b, I would also hope that part of that meeting is not
simply Exceptions, anticipated challenges, or
problems. Those are important to talk about,
in in the appropriate context. However, If that's how we start
our day every single day, what are we gonna be looking for all day, every
single day? Exceptions, challenges, and problems.
(09:44):
What if we could just make a simple start
to talk about something we're grateful for that happened yesterday? And
by the way, The research is very clear. It doesn't need to be
something monumental. It could be something really simple, and it
could be something personal too. A team member might say I'm really happy. I I
came home, and my spouse brought me home their extra cookie from lunch.
(10:06):
Like, that generates positivity. That causes
The positive chemicals in our brain that start flowing around that can
start to change the narrative of how we see our lives every single day.
Wow. And you're so right. This is a journey. I mean, this is something
my my wife and I have learned how to do over the years too is
just the The practicing gratitude, and and it was interesting. When
(10:28):
when we first started, sometimes, like, my gratitude was, I am glad
I never have to do this day over Like like, it literally was that simple.
It's like, today sucked. It was awful. Yeah. And I never have to do
this day. I'll I'll have to do another form of it, but, like, this day,
never again. And through that process and this has
been, like I said, a long journey, that all of a sudden we found
(10:50):
ourselves on the couch over New Year's. And instead of
my mind going to everything I didn't get done last year, I
finished, and my wife looked at me with astonishment. And she said, you
realize, like, you just gave me 75 or 80 things that
went really well last year. Absolutely. And, like, And that was a new
thing for us, and we've had to work to get there because if you'd known
(11:12):
me a decade ago, it was all negative. And so So so what you're
talking about is so important, but once again, I I I think it's
hard for us to embrace that. And and you mentioned especially with With what
we invest in. Right? We'll invest in our clinical skills or our business skills, but
we don't take the time and effort to to invest in the the skill of
optimist. Absolutely. And I think this would be a good
(11:34):
point to put a pin in the idea of toxic
positivity. Because oftentimes, The minute we start talking about
happiness or optimism, people bring in that phrase into the
conversation. So toxic positivity
is only ever looking at the bright side. That is not how I live my
life. Toxic positivity is classically
(11:56):
described in the catchphrase that's on t shirts and hats, good vibes
only. Life isn't about good vibes only, ladies and gentlemen. Sorry to
break it to you. And so happiness is a comparative
Nation. And so we cannot know happiness
without knowing sadness and sorrow. One of
my favorite books is by doctor Viktor Frankl, Man's Search For
(12:19):
Meaning. He's a noted neurologist, psychiatrist, and a
holocaust survivor. He survived the horrors of Auschwitz
to then be a beacon in the world to say there is
always hope in the darkness. And one of the quotes that I often
use in in my teachings, in my lectures, in my workshops is
between stimulus and response, there's a space. And in
(12:41):
that space lies our freedom to choose our response. And in
our response lies our growth and our freedom. So it's not about
what life deals you. It's about how you
respond to what life deals you. End of story.
Interesting. Now the this Toxic positivity. I don't I don't know that I've heard that
term before, and I and I think that that's interesting. So so how
(13:04):
do we bring that into our our morning meetings And and make
sure we're actually really practicing those those gratitudes and optimism
and not just falling into a toxic positivity. Absolutely. I that's
a great question. So another phrase that certain people
think is toxic when it's used,
individually is the phrase everything happens for a reason.
(13:26):
I don't use it in a solo form like or an isolated
form like that. The way I use it is everything happens for a reason.
This stinks, or other words, you can choose. I'm gonna
be mad about it. I'm gonna let my emotions flow through and flow past
me, and then I'm gonna focus on What did
this situation teach me about
(13:49):
this occurrence, this person, this reality
of life? So what you're doing is you're acknowledging the negative,
you're allowing the negative to flow through you, then you're turning your
lens on, How can I be a better person from this? What can I learn
from this? What can I gain from this? And then you start to focus
on The the difference is imp impossibility.
(14:12):
Doctor Barbara Fredrickson, wrote a paper and coined, the
broaden and build theory. And, Basically, I'm summarizing
where these positive thought repertoires in
repetition Allow us to broaden our
ability to see things differently, and it even
(14:32):
creates new neuronal connections in our brain that we can then go back to
later when things get difficult. So there's
a physiologic element to this as well,
within the body of the positive psychology Literature. Wow.
So so we're we're actually transforming our brains through through doing
this and creating new neuro connections Yep. So that all of a sudden
(14:54):
it becomes easier to to recognize and be Tim
instead of focusing on everything that's going wrong. Yes.
Wow. That that is so fascinating. Now, you know, you also talk a
little bit about a team concept. Right? Thoughts, emotions, actions, and
that leading to manifestations. Can you Absolutely. Delve a little deeper into
that that model and how we might use that to to really create a
(15:17):
culture of optimism? Sure. This is an adaptation of a model
of 2 of my friends and mentors, Jen Barley and Karen Sullivan.
And it it's Understanding the reality that
everything in life that happens is Dental, going along with Viktor Frankl and
others' works. It's our thought that gives power to that situation
that drives an emotion, that drives then therefore an action, that then
(15:40):
therefore manifest results. So here's the example I give from from the
podium What I'm doing keynotes. I ask everybody
to think about their dearest friend that they don't live with.
K? And so I usually ask somebody to say, give
me the name. You know? So let's let's say it's Johnny. And so
If we're there on a given Wednesday, I said, okay, everybody. We're gonna put
(16:03):
care and concern about Johnny in a little box. We're gonna close the cover of
the box. We're gonna put it over here. K? So
it's a Wednesday. Let's pretend. And you texted
Johnny, said dear friend, last Wednesday, and you haven't heard back from him.
So barring Nation concern, what might you be thinking about Johnny? Well,
(16:23):
who does he think he is? At least too busy to Text me back or
maybe, oh, I saw him go out with the Joneses on Facebook. He wasn't too
busy to go out with them, but he's too busy to text me back. What
kind of emotions does that drive? Anger? Frustration? What kind of
actions does that drive? Well, it kinda depends on the kind of person you are.
You might send Tim an angry text, a passive aggressive text, or if you're really
(16:45):
analytical, maybe you'll wait the exact same number of days it took him to
text you back Until you text him back. But see,
this game, this this example, I tricked everyone who thought
of said dear friend because How do those actions manifest
the maintenance and and continuation of said dear friendship?
They don't. So now let's take care and compassion
(17:08):
out of the box. K? Now you found out, gosh
forbid, that something happened to Johnny. Now what are your
thoughts? Oh my gosh. What can I do? How can I help? What does he
need? What are your emotions? Care, love, compassion. What are your
actions? Well, it depends. You know, DoorDash dinner, take care of their
kids or pets, whatever. You get the idea. And how does that manifest
(17:30):
in maintaining or growing the friendship? Well, that's a different thing. And what's the
only thing that changed? You're sitting in Viktor
Frankl's space and you're making stuff up
Versus thinking toward a positive
outcome. Because the truth is
The positive future is just as valid as the negative future
(17:53):
because neither has happened yet. Wow. So this is the cost
of sitting in the negative. Yeah. Well and it goes back to that narrative, that
story that we're telling ourselves. Right? What what's the narrative you're sitting
with with these things? Yeah. Yeah. That's interesting. Do
you find a lot of that that narrative creation happens with the
unknown situations and things? Right. Something happens, and we
(18:15):
we have an unknown outcome, and so we're more negative to or or more apt
to write a negative outcome instead of a positive outcome for that story.
I do believe that life experience and
life itself plays a huge role in this,
in in the narrative as as you asked. And we need
to give that grace and understanding because we're humans. And when
(18:37):
negative things happen, That stinks. Like, let's just call it what it is.
And it can be exceedingly frustrating, and
it it doesn't make it any better. One of the,
Hallmark Nation principles in my original coaching program was this concept
of assumption. And that, You
know, we can never assume that something's gonna happen in the exact same
(18:59):
way that happened before unless all of the factors
that were there before are present today.
So let me give a real life example within dentistry.
Staff Tim members are hard to find these days. Everyone's challenged
with with, having a full a full team. And
so there are a lot of individuals that have,
(19:22):
applied for jobs, set up interviews, come in for interviews,
and then ghost. They just disappear. And
so it's understandable that leaders within practices can
get jaded. However, let's flip the equation.
Let's pretend now that you're the the next candidate,
and they're aware that your thought process is well, you know,
(19:45):
I just interviewed 3 other people. They all ghosted. They didn't work out. This
person probably just like everybody else. I'm not even gonna, you know, get my
hopes up that they're good. Like, how do you think that person would
feel? Yeah. It's a interesting example if
you think about it. To flip the Narrative and and have the
other person hear it. All of a sudden, it takes on a different context.
(20:08):
Yeah. Oh my gosh. Wow. How how powerful. And, right, and
and this has real life implications in in our professional and personal
lives too, doesn't it? Oh, a 100%. A 100%. Let's
say, You know, in that in that same situation with Johnny
and and texting, let's say you come at them and and you send
them a nasty text, And then you find out something
(20:30):
terrible happened, and they get all upset with you
that you didn't have the grace To to give them a little slack and
depending on the individual and the relationship, it it might ruin the
relationship forever because of an assumption, because of the,
living in a space and and jumping to conclusions, or as I like to call
it, jumping to catastrophe. Depending on the
(20:52):
situation. Oh my gosh. I I love that. Yes. I I think a lot of
us are guilty of, jumping to to catastrophe. And so Yeah. You
know, we're we're talking about this this Optimistic mindset and and really
changing the narrative and and practicing gratitude and the
science behind it. And And, right, how does an optimistic
mindset how does that influence what goes on in the dental practice? Does
(21:14):
it does it influence how we're gonna do treatment planning? Does it
Ultimately impact how we deal with our staff, and and does it impact the financial
success we may even have? Yes. Yes. Yes. And yes.
And in fact, I invite everybody. January's edition of
Dental Economics. I have a featured cover article on this topic. 10
or 11 different scientific references, some of which I'll share right now,
(21:36):
but it's on page 10. It's the culture edition, of dental
economics. And so the answer is absolutely yes. So
let me give you a couple of small examples. It actually
influences Our brain function. So Brian
conducted a study, doctor Brian, with school children.
He went into a schoolhouse, And these kids were about to take
(22:00):
a standardized math test. He split them in 2. In each group,
they had high, middle, and low academic performers. 1 group just
simply took the exam. The other group were part of
a facilitated discussion that went something like this. Of course, I'm
paraphrasing. We wanna talk about the happiest day in your lives. What
did you do? Who were you with? How fun was it? What did you
(22:22):
experience? Blah blah blah. Okay. Great. Thank you. Now go
take your exam. They blew the doors off the other group.
I'll give you another example. Schmidt's. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait.
Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait.
Go back to that one. You're telling me you're telling me, like, just
(22:42):
the the very act they write same test. They split the kids up. Yeah. They
asked 1 group, like, just Tell us about a happy day in your happiest day
of your life. Yeah. And those kids, like, did so much better on the test
than the other group. A 100%. Let's, now
I'm about to blow your mind because I was gonna tell you about Schmidt's, which
I can, but let's talk about Estrada's work. Because We're
(23:03):
we're now gonna go to the opposite extreme. Let's talk about
physicians. Mhmm. So Estrada was looking to investigate
how positivity Influence diagnosis
and anchoring. So anchoring for those who may not be too familiar with the term,
that's when you get literally stuck or anchored To a
differential diagnosis, a hypothesis, or an idea despite
(23:26):
other facts coming to your knowledge. K.
So he worked with these physicians, and he gave them
medical information to read, to come to a diagnosis, And they were timed.
There was no time limit, but they were timed. So there were 3
groups. The control group, just simply given the information.
The neutral group, They were asked to read what was deemed
(23:48):
either negative or or positive medical information before
the information containing in the study. And then the
group Thrive to be happy, which I'll share with you in a second.
The physicians primed to be happy Came to a
diagnosis 20% of the way through the material, twice as fast as the
other 2 groups with 2 and a half times less anchoring
(24:10):
exhibited. And here's why this is so important.
Do you know how they're trying to be happy? With candy. Not
the actual eating of candy that could mess with their blood sugar, but simply
as I read the study, here doctor, here's some candy. You can eat this when
you're done. So here's the point, and this goes back to this
whole toxic positivity stuff, etcetera, etcetera. Small jolts of
(24:33):
positivity matter And can have influence and
influence how our brain literally functions. So,
yeah, it's that important To diagnose the student planning and
practice success. Period. My gosh. Well and and these are things, right,
we can weave into the conversations as you're seeing your patients, as you're
talking to your staff. Right? It can be, right, as simple as, you know,
(24:56):
like, right, bringing an example up for the patient to help them
practice Gratitudes. Well, they're in your chair. Right? You can do this without them even
being aware of it. A 100%. Yeah. A 100%. And
look, You know, I I'm very close friends with doctor Kyle
Stanley, and and we work together. And I know we're gonna talk a little bit
about what he and I are doing a little bit later, but He he's he's
(25:17):
one of the other giants in dentistry talking about mental health for dentists
and burnout, and he has a fantastic course called the mentally resilient
dentist. But But the reason why he comes to my mind right now and right
here is because he talks about how we operate in an environment of fear,
where the patients that are coming to us are coming with their prior dental
experience. They're afraid. The the data on phobia is very
(25:39):
clear. The data on phobia of the injection is very, very
clear. There's data that that shows or research that shows
that when we give local anesthesia, our blood pressure goes up due
to empathy. So helping our patients
kinda work through that prior dental anxiety
and and acknowledging it, Not not moving past it. Like, when I
(26:01):
work with teams all the time, particularly on listening skills,
if a patient sits there and says, you know, I'm really, really nervous about this
Filling this root canal, this extraction. Oh, you
know, doctor Jones is really wonderful. You have nothing to worry about. You
didn't acknowledge them at all. And so
we're also negating their concerns. Right? So this this kinda
(26:24):
goes back to what we said before. Happiness is a comparative emotion. We gotta
work through that negativity to get to the other side of positivity.
Wow. Now, you know, as you were talking about that, right, I I I
wonder about different career paths for for people in different industries.
And And, Ray, as we're talking about this, it it really feels
like some industries are are more prone to to
(26:47):
really benefit from the Science of optimism and and from the
science of gratitude and and helping people work through things. Right?
Because especially Right? You've got that caregiver fatigue. You've got
the empathy piece, and it's it's a lot harder on a lot of us to
go through these things than, You know, there there may
be some other profession out there. So so have you found some industries
(27:09):
really suffer a lot more than others when it comes Science
in what you're doing? Sean Accor actually talks about it in the happiness advance
relative to our attorney colleagues, because
they're actually trained to look for inconsistency and error.
Mhmm. And so for some individuals in their personal lives, they can't turn it
off. Mhmm. And so although, yes, dentistry has a very
(27:31):
significantly Higher incidence of suicide than the general populace.
It's my understanding, and I I don't have the data on this. It's my understanding
that, Attorneys have as high, if not higher of a
suicide rate than even dentists do. Okay. But
the the research is clear on dentists. It was The JADA study
from 2015, we have two and a half times the incidence of
(27:53):
the general population of anxiety disorder, depression, and panic
disorder. Two times. Wow. And it has a lot to do with all the
things Kyle talks about, environment of fear, media betrayal,
all these, you know, physical,
Challenge of what it is we do because it's so taxing on our bodies. It's
the list goes on and on. Wow. Okay. Yeah. No. That that's fascinating. And I
(28:16):
think especially the attorney piece. Right? That that makes a lot of sense because they
are. There's they're they're trained to spot those inconsistencies.
That's what they do for a living. Exactly. You know, it it sounds
like we do have some solutions here. Right? Some science backed solutions
to to really help dentists and other professionals move forward.
But, you know, I don't know that we see a lot of this conversation going
(28:38):
on. I I think we have more of it, but it still doesn't feel very
widespread. Why do you think that we really have some of these barriers
to to people being willing to invest in this the same way we
might invest in a business coach or a mastermind group or a New piece
of equipment for our office. I think within dentistry
itself, my observation is that
(29:00):
If we if we we're we're so trained to work in millimeters and
and be so exacting that if we can't put our fingers on something
absolutely exacting, thing, then it's not as valuable.
However, the the data we just talked about, anxiety,
depression, and panic disorder speak for itself. You talk to most dentists
and you ask them, what's your most challenging part of dental practice? They're not gonna
(29:23):
say clinical. They're gonna say managing the team.
And My perspective, my personal perspective,
having worked with technically thousands of offices on the phone
And, 100 in person
is that we don't give enough gravitas
(29:43):
To the true reality that there can be a gap in
life experience between doctor and team. That's not criticism.
That's not a judgment. That's just the way it is. And
so what gets us leaders into trouble
In in many instances is that we expect
(30:04):
our teams to engage, interact, and
interpret Situations and reality is
the way we do, and they don't. And
so what can we do about it? Well, From
my part of it, what I very firmly believe is that
if we can establish a communication alliance,
(30:26):
which is part of the work I do, So that we can sit down and
we can talk about what kind of practice do we wanna show up to every
day, what are the words that or phrases that exemplify that,
How do we wanna show up when there are challenges? So maybe words would be,
like, open minded or with kindness or with patience. And how do
we wanna keep each other accountable, You know, with grace, etcetera, and
(30:48):
sometimes the words overlap, then we have a place to
start from. And and if we can get the team to acknowledge regardless
of How many years they've been in dentistry, what their backgrounds are, it doesn't matter.
If we can get everybody agree that this is the alliance we're gonna live by,
we're gonna have a safe word. Most of them pick pineapple. Don't ask me
why. And, then it gives us an opportunity in the
(31:10):
appropriate time, of course, never in front of a patient, To to
then to to wave the white flag and say,
hey. I have concerns about what's going on here. If we could do
even just that, That changes the face
of an entire practice, and and I've seen it over and over again.
Wow. That that's so powerful. And, Right. You're talking about alliance.
(31:33):
Right? That starts to bring up the ideas to me at least of of
collaboration, of community, of having support of others. And
I know that's something you often emphasize is, right, just the importance
of not going it alone and and the value of con
of that community support. And so, You know, with those alliances, is
that one of the ways that they can leverage their their team for growth
(31:55):
and success, and are there some other ways that they can Really leverage the
the community in in collaboration for further success.
Yeah. So the the alliance is a big part. The
Just simply the discussion that we don't all
necessarily see things the same way can can really blow
doors down, for many practices
(32:18):
because I I haven't been to a practice
yet where somebody within the team, doesn't matter who,
Or or the doctor. Right? When I say team, I mean everybody. Is
looking at things a certain way that they had never verbalized before.
And so just simply the acknowledgement that, oh,
maybe my interpretation of x, y, or z may not
(32:41):
really be What's going on? You know?
Maybe this individual team member's gruff
Hello. Good morning had more to do with the fact that their mom is ill
Mhmm. Than it does you. And so when we
can Kinda lift ourselves out of that
(33:02):
space, Viktor Frankl's space. That alone
Can can change the dynamic, and and that's not enough
because that's just the first step In many
ways or or part of the first stage. Mhmm. Once
we acknowledge that and we're willing to work through it, then we can
have further discussions around, you know, how do we wanna engage with each other?
(33:25):
What am I committed to doing more of, doing less of,
Stopping or starting. And and we can
have all those really fantastical discussions, But we're not
gonna get there unless we acknowledge the fact that
everything that we typically are driving toward as a result in
a dental practice, Production, communication,
(33:48):
teamwork, problem solving, strategic
planning, those are all results. Those are all
results of actually interacting with each other. And unless we're actually
interacting with each other on even partially and even plain
communication wise, We don't have a hope of taking the
practice to a different level because we're always gonna get stuck Wow.
(34:10):
Between them. Oh my gosh. How powerful. And I know
this this alliance framework is something that you teach and you help
practices implement. And, You know, what are what
are some common transformations and results that you start to see in the
the teams when you go in there and you start Implementing this alliance framework
and the and the team really starts communicating and working together.
(34:32):
What do you start to see happen in the practices? Great question.
Lots of fun stuff, to be honest with you. It's, I've
heard all different kinds of positive
movements, many of which start Almost immediately, which would
make sense. Right? Because you you just did the workshop on a Friday. Now we're
back on Monday, and it's fresh in your mind. And
(34:55):
I've had reports of teams where 2 team members
were starting to have a discussion. I'll put that in air quotes. And
a 3rd team member witnesses it, came up and said, pineapple.
Next thing you know, it stopped everybody in their tracks, and they're like, what do
you mean? And they're like, Let's talk about this. And it allowed them to move
through things in a better and different way. I have
(35:17):
a practice I just worked with in, Fresno just a couple weeks
ago, and they've engaged their safe word a couple times over a
specific Nation, and they're making progress.
So It's really neat to see
the self managed
Movement on the part of the team that takes accountability, that takes
(35:39):
leadership, ownership to not only their own
behaviors, but the behaviors of others To drive what it is
everybody agreed they wanted to do to begin with, which for almost all of
us is excellent patient care. At least I would hope. Yeah.
So that's Wealth we're driving toward. Wow. Right now now
right. It's such a powerful story. Right? And I love that. Right? Just
(36:01):
driving communication so that you can Serve your patients better and actually
even have more fun and enjoy what you do. And, and, you
know, management techniques, those Come and go. Right? There's always a new
management technique, always a new strategy or tactic. And so so
why do you think this really differs than Dentist some management technique
coming Right? What what actually makes this different?
(36:23):
Because it's not a technique. It's a
way of managing through your day. You know, whether
it's my my team framework, my mentor's TFAR
framework, thoughts, feelings, actions, results, Oh,
it's all based in cognitive behavioral therapy. And so it's all
based on challenging assumption to move
(36:45):
yourself forward. You know, I I've
had it it it's it's an
often talked about reality of today of ghosting
in the personal space and the workplace. In fact,
Simon Sinek has a fantastic short video on ghosting I
recommend everybody watch. It took me a long
(37:07):
time to get over the fact that it wasn't about
me. And I've had career making
opportunities come to me after
following up for several years
and not making it about me. And what I mean by this
is, you know, an unanswered Communications,
(37:30):
text, emails, etcetera. If I made it about me,
I wouldn't have sent the next text. I wouldn't have sent the next
email. Now understand, these aren't cold emails.
These aren't cold phone calls. These are warm interactions. These are
interactions where we've had discussions that we wanna move forward.
And so if I allowed my space to be
(37:53):
clouded by negative assumption, I we
wouldn't even be sitting here today Talk about this stuff. Wow.
I and and so do you see this kind of this new way of moving
forward, right, the really kinda pushing through In
embracing the the science of optimism, do you see this really
kinda starting to fit into the evolving landscape of dental practices, and
(38:16):
do you see this being Part of the the future of of practice management?
I believe the answer wholeheartedly is yes. And
COVID was a terrible part part of our
history. However, What it yielded
was an awareness within dentistry that, Houston,
(38:37):
we got a problem. And it shown light
on a lot of these challenges, these psychological challenges.
And so I do believe this kind of thing is gonna continue.
I think I I have personal evidence of it. I just gave
a keynote to a subsidiary of UnitedHealthcare. They're not even in
dentistry. This is a $500,000,000 plus company a year. Little old me
(39:00):
was talking about using optimism to achieve strategic
goals of this massive corporation.
I'm not at liberty to say yet, but I'm gonna be speaking at the
sales meeting of one of the largest dental companies in the world
at to their sales team. And so
The if if the corporate and DSOs too, I'm in discussions with
(39:23):
DSOs. If these entities are identifying this as something
that's gonna help drive the bottom line, I think the solo and
or the small group practitioner needs to listen.
Wow. How powerful. And, And so how do you typically engage with
these organizations? Is it through workshops, individual coaching? Right? How
can we engage with you if we're interested in exploring How to
(39:46):
build this into our practices and our lives? Absolutely. It
like any business like mine, it it runs the gamut.
And so When I say it runs the gamut, it has everything to
do with need because I have certain skills, abilities, and and
and instruments that I can deploy
Based on need. So for some individuals, they enter through,
(40:09):
just individual 1 on 1 coaching first. Some
individuals want me to come into their team and then follow-up with with
1 on 1 coaching. Then on the corporate or DSO side,
I have these entities that are saying we want you as a keynote or a
webinar to kinda set the tone,
The knowledge, the nomenclature to then move forward. So what I've
(40:31):
done is on my website, which is just my name, martin
Mendelson dot com, I have all of those kinda spread
out into tabs with, testimonials of
individuals I've worked with. I have a A full speaker kit with all of
my, subjects in there as well as the
workshops, and it's all there on the website, as a one stop
(40:53):
shop for people to kinda dig their teeth into. What what does this really mean?
What does this really look like? Awesome. Yeah. And I put a a link down
below for everyone to Martin's website. I'd encourage you to check it out. One of
my favorite sections on there is the books you love. Right? The the resources
that are there for for us to continue to engage, to learn, to grow.
And so why, Your your website isn't just about you. Right? It's a a
(41:15):
resource for us to learn also, which is Absolutely. Wonderful.
Absolutely. And it's it's It's so fun to also highlight authors that I
happen to know personally that have written pretty amazing groundbreaking
books. And, doctor Tal Ben Shahar, who,
is Harvard trained, and he gained,
notoriety and attention a number of years ago When the Boston Globe
(41:37):
did an article on Tim, he was teaching at Harvard at the time. They said,
why is why are all these Harvard students Lining up to take a course on
happiness. You know, aren't they happy there at Harvard? And so I've
had it you know, I took his course. I had the chance to interact with
him. I had a podcast for a hot minute, and, he was
gracious enough to be a guest on there. And, Sean Swarner is an
(41:58):
author who's on there that was in my coaching program, who's One of the only
individual the only individual in the world that's climbed Mount Everest with 1
lung. Talk about optimism. So there's some great
stuff on Really, really good stuff. So thank you for highlighting that. Yeah. No. I
I think it's a a great resource, and I would encourage everyone. Click click below.
Check that out. I and I think you also have some or or workshop coming
(42:20):
up at the the end of the year, I believe, November sometime.
Yeah. So I I talked about my my dear friend, doctor Kyle
Stanley. We we met, almost by accident in the middle of the
pandemic, thanks to doctor Todd Shire. And he wanna do a
Facebook live about mental health and dentistry. And Kyle has a
fantastic framework on, as I talked about earlier, the mentally resilient
(42:41):
dentist. And so what we've done is we've joined
forces. And so we take his frameworks that he teaches
within his online course, And my exercises and
my facilitation skills, and we we jokingly say we
birth this baby called Light Side Live. And so we've given light
side live several times now. We get once in Huntington Beach, once in
(43:03):
Milwaukee. And now, we
just Finished getting all of our t's crossed and i's out
yesterday. Glidewell Laboratory is allowing us
to, used their facility in November, November 1st
2nd, to host light side
live on their campus. And so, Kyle's
(43:24):
website is lightsidedentistry.com, and then there's a
tab for Light Side Live. There's so many
Video testimonials that just make me just
humble when I see them, because what we're able to
do when we come together And support each other
is like nothing I've ever seen. And and I believe we're like
(43:47):
you alluded to before, we're on the ground floor of something big, from
from what we've seen from all of these individuals. Yeah. Wow. Wealth,
hey. Thank you for being here, and thank you for sharing so generously. I I
know I certainly have a much better standing of what the science has
to say about engaging with the world Nation and certainly a much better
understanding of why gratitude matters so much and And certainly feel
(44:08):
empowered to to take those 1st steps and move towards even more gratitude
and and optimism. But before we sign off here, any closing thoughts
for us? I think that
wherever you are, whoever you are, you are right
where you're meant to be. And that might sound trite,
(44:30):
but we are all the totality of our lives experience.
And we can choose to Look back to the
past with regret. We can choose to look back to
the past with judgment, with sadness, Or we can choose
to move forward. And that's a choice that we
make every day because the the the reality is
(44:53):
All we have is the present. The past has already happened. There's nothing we
can do about it. And by the way, the future hasn't happened yet. And
so as I said earlier, looking toward the future with positivity is just as
valid as looking to the future with negativity. And by the way, When we get
to that future, that's now our present. So all we
have is the present moment. And if even after all
(45:15):
this wonderful discussion, You sit there and say, well, you know, Martin, I
still need to look toward the future with a bit of trepidation to prepare
myself. There's a difference between Saving money
for retirement and having a mindset of
negativity because the science is clear. If
we allow ourselves to make the choice to be steeped in
(45:37):
negativity, it's negativity we will see. We will not
allow our brains to be more broad to see opportunities and
possibilities, and it will ultimately impact our lives whether that
be personal or Treatment planning or
productivity within dental practices, period. So
powerful. You're right. All all we have is the the president. A good friend of
(45:59):
mine, one of the leading Geologists out there, a guy named Steven Sizzler,
really talks about you you can stare I can stare at my watch all day
long, and I'm never gonna be in the future. I'm always gonna be right now.
Yep. Right? It doesn't I I've watched my clock for 10000 hours, and I'm
still gonna be right here right now. Yep. And, so, yes, the
the the being present and and Focusing on that, I think, is so
(46:20):
important. So thank you for that reminder, Martin. Absolutely. It's
been a pleasure and an honor to Spend a little time with you and
continue to kinda get my message out there. Yeah. Excellent. And
wanna certainly support that because I think a more Tim
Wealth is a better world. So thank you for tuning in to Dental Wealth Nation.
We'll see you all here again really soon. Take care.
(46:46):
You've been listening to Dental Wealth Nation. We hope you've gotten
some useful and practical Nation the show. Join us
next time as we pull back the curtain to reveal the often
hidden advice and strategies who's by today's most successful
individuals and families, and help maximize your net
worth so you can take even better care of the people you love.
(47:08):
Till Next time, make sure to hit the website at
Nation
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