The comedown

It’s real. The comedown. That feeling you get, the low, the low-level depression, that feeling of loneliness or emptiness after a big moment- that key speech you gave, that show you played, that big, huge conversation you’ve been preparing for.  Dia and Baby A discuss their own comedown experiences and Dia shares a 5-step framework for dealing with your own: 

Caring for your comedown:

1. Take time, take care. Be tender with yourself. Don’t just power through. It’s a big letdown after using all the adrenaline you needed to do that big thing.  Now rest and take care. Go for a walk? Take a nap? Debrief with a friend who can show you the tenderness you need.  
2. Reflect on what worked. And then? Lock that in. Once you’ve recovered a bit but are still feeling that soft glow of the moment (even if it’s bittersweet) take a look and reflect on what worked about what you did on stage, in that meeting, in that conversation. When you presented yourself, your art, your ideas in a way that landed some or all of it well, take a few minutes to notice what you did that worked, why you think it works and if you’d like to have that be something you do every time you get in front of an audience that matters. 
3. Forgive yourself for what didn’t work. Nothing is ever as perfect as you want it to be. So, take a moment to forgive what didn’t work. That moment you interrupted, that time you stumbled. That punchline you missed. Let it go. Let yourself off the hook. 
4. Find someone to debrief. Phone a friend, a colleague, a parent or your favorite aunt.  Having a nice debrief with someone who is willing to talk about what you did in front of that room honestly but with care and compassion- ready to just listen if you need it or provide calibrated feedback is critical to getting your feet back on the ground on your way out of a comedown. 
5. See it in the continuum of all of the big moments. Notice that what you did in that performance, is ephemeral and lives in the context of your full leadership life, your full body of work, your full career or business. This may shrink that feeling of “win/lose”, that critical communications or presentation moments can have. When you put it on the continuum of your steps to a goal- it can fade into a larger fabric of your life, leadership and aspirations. In that context you can shrink the power of that ONE moment, let it fade into the scene of your life and it can loosen its grip a bit and ease you out of the comedown and back into everyday life. 

The Power of Full Engagement is a great resource for managing your energy through a series of, or a lifetime of stepping into high performance moments with full engagement and without too much comedown.

➡️ Check it out here: Power of Full Engagement

 

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