128. What is Our Responsibility as Space-holders to Comment on Global Tragedies?

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In the landscape of social media, I often find myself at the crossroads of silence and declaration when it comes to global conflicts. It's a place where every post and comment is scrutinized, and things that are happening thousands of miles away from you can press upon your conscience. But what happens when you choose the path of quiet reflection over public proclamation? And why would someone choose to say silent in the face of so much heartache and corruption in the world?  This episode is a heartfelt exploration into the ethical maze of speaking out on complex geopolitical issues, where I open up about the pressures to voice an opinion and the profound realization that sometimes, the most responsible action is to pause and learn.

As we navigate the digital world's expectation for instant reactions to societal events, the art of setting personal boundaries emerges as a vital skill. Here, I share the allure of crafting intimate connections through deep, thoughtful conversations, highlighting the power of subtler forms of support and influence. We don't always need to shout to be heard; often, it's the quiet presence and the space we hold for one-on-one dialogue that can leave an indelible mark on the hearts and minds of others. Join me as we explore the value of the unsung impact of those quieter contributions and discover how they can resonate just as profoundly within the collective narrative.

Kat HoSoo Lee is an Emotional Alchemy Coach, Spiritual Business Mentor and host of The Emotional Alchemy Podcast.

She loves playing in the space where science and spirituality converge because this is where we get to experience emotional alchemy. In her work, she educates space-holders about somatic physiology and environmental biology so they can deepen their practices of listening and presence which ultimately helps them expand their capacity to hold space for others.

As a Spiritual Business Mentor, she guides soulful entrepreneurs to approach their business as a spiritual practice. The work bridges the emotional landscape with practical tools which allow them to cultivate businesses that are rooted in conscious values, relational marketing and purposeful service.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey, so today's chat's gonna be a little bit on
the heavy side.
This is a question that I'vebeen I wouldn't say I've been
grappling with it, but I'vedefinitely been pondering it for
a little while and the questionis around what is our
responsibility when it comes tosome of these big things that

(00:24):
are happening in our world aspeople who have online platforms
, as coaches, as mentors, asguides and I personally made a
very conscious decision to notsay anything when it came to the
most recent clash over Gaza andPalestine, and pretty soon

(00:53):
after that, I had people cominginto my DMs demanding that I say
something, demanding that Ishare, like other people's work,
demanding that I take a stance.
Some of it was actually quiterespectful, some of it came from
a genuine sense of curiosity,and I was able to engage with

(01:16):
some really interestingconversations in that space, but
a lot of it was accusatory.
It was saying that my silenceis violence.
I was being told that, assomebody who works with trauma,
that I needed to say somethingabout this, and I wrote an

(01:37):
entire post about it, and Ithink it's worth reading that
post, and I hope that you listenall the way to the end of this,
because I really do think thatit is not everyone's
responsibility to say something,to be on the front lines, and I
have a personal story that I'msharing, with consent, from one

(01:58):
of my clients about what my rolehas been in this particular
conflict.
So I wrote my silence is not anact of aggression.
I am doing what I always do tofind balance.
I return to a yin state when Iam unsure what the appropriate
action is.

(02:18):
The fact that there is a massiveglobal catastrophe does not
mean that I need to veer from mytruth of how I access my own
inner wisdom.
My silence is not a freeze or acollapse.
It is receptivity and digestion.
I am not a geopolitical experton the Middle East, so it would
be unethical for me to shareanything that my personal
opinion based on my limitedunderstanding of the situation.
My responsibility is to learnthrough independent journalism

(02:42):
and discussions with my innercircle.
It's a lot to get caught up on.
In my silence I am learning, notteaching.
I am feeling so I can stayrooted in my body with the
actions I choose to take and thewords I choose to share.
Let me be clear here myignorance is not something that
I feel guilty or ashamed aboutmy ignorance is also not
indifference, nor is it neutral.
Of course I care.

(03:03):
I can't numb my heart toviolence and death, or will I
ever find a justification forgenocide and colonization.
I struggle to wrap my headaround the lies coming from my
political leaders and news.
It's frustrating to see howblatant motivations are when you
start tracking the money.
It's terrifying to feel theknife's edge.
The entire world is standing on.
Of course I care.

(03:24):
I educate folks on things I amexperienced in.
I am a teacher of emotionalalchemy, nervous system
regulation, somatic healing andethical and spiritual
entrepreneurship.
To hold the integrity of therole I hold here, I have a
boundary for what I do or do notshare.
I only share what I feelregulated, experienced and or
integrated about.
Again, this is an ethical andintentional choice I have made

(03:46):
about how I interact with socialmedia, and one I will stick to,
even when especially whenthings feel tumultuous, I
recognize there is privilege inbeing able to stay silent until
I'm ready to share publicly.
But I also hold aresponsibility to tend to my own
nervous system so that I amable to hold space for folks who
are more directly involved oraffected by this.

(04:07):
And then I went on to listseveral sources that I was
learning from.
Oh, actually, it continues on,sorry.
My clients and community knowthat I am here to hold and
express the appropriate andnecessary rage, grief, confusion
, etc.
About what is going on.
In fact, it's been the topic ofmany sessions I've been having

(04:28):
with clients this week.
However, if you are looking tome for any ideas on what should
or should not happen about theconflict, I am not that person.
For me to pretend that I knowenough about Israel, palestine,
gaza, hamas, jewish people wouldbe performative and unethical.
As a teacher, I am not a leaderon this topic.
My responsibility in thisdiscussion is to point you to

(04:48):
the actual leaders in this spacewho I've been listening to.
So I shared that, and what washappening in the background is
that I have a client who is ofJewish heritage and has been
raised with a Zionist mindset,belief and in all of this, in

(05:20):
seeing everything that washappening in the world, in
really sort of examining her ownrelationship to colonization
and in being a deeply thinkingand caring person, she was
starting to question a lot ofthese stories that she had been

(05:43):
told since childhood, and thiswas a big departure for her
because it was, veryunderstandably, going to create
a rift in her family.
She had a lot of questionsaround even what her
responsibility is, as she'squestioning if she held a

(06:05):
responsibility to say somethingto her family, to explore this
with her family, and she broughtit instead to me.
And I didn't approach this fromthe context of a political

(06:25):
landscape.
I approached it from thecontext of emotions and, in
particular, we explored a lotaround anger and grief and, as
you can imagine, there was a lotof confusion just coming up in
her body and a lot of work thatneeded to be done around her own

(06:52):
self-trust and trust in others,trust in the community that she
had been raised in and thefamily that she had been raised
in and the stories that havebeen told to her.
And I know that had I beenposting things like this, or
rather, had I been postingreally politicized things on

(07:20):
social media, she wouldn't havefelt safe to explore these
spaces with me.
And she's not the only personthat I was supporting around
this who are actually directlyaffected by this conflict.
She's she just happens to bethe one that she encouraged me
actually to go on social mediaand share our story, and I think

(07:49):
that it's so easy to get caughtup in the wave of shuds when it
comes to voicing our opinionsabout so many things that feel
really scary and reallydisempowering in the world right

(08:09):
now, and yet we still needplaces that people feel like is
a neutral landscape so that theycan explore and come to
conclusions about their ownstories and experiences on their
own, without judgment, withoutfeeling pressure to lean one way

(08:33):
or another.
And I think that we asspaceholders, as folks who are
also deeply thinking andcompassionate humans, we have
differentiations of roles here.
So, just the way that mypersonality is, I am not

(08:56):
somebody who's going to be onthe front lines of protests and
marches.
That feels like an incrediblydisregulating experience for me.
I don't like crowds.
I don't like being in spaceswhere there's a lot of humans
around.
I love humaning, I love otherhumans, but put me in a crowd

(09:18):
and it's not a great time for me.
And yet I do really wellone-on-one when it comes to
connecting to people and askinghard questions and asking them
to explore what's going on intheir own inner landscape, and I
much prefer to do my work inthese spaces.

(09:39):
And so if you are somebody whois out there and feels like you
have enough of that, likeextroverted energy like I am.
So here for you, I am sosupportive of you doing your
work in that way, and there aresome of us who are going to do

(10:04):
quiet work.
I know, I know in my bones thatthe work that this woman and I
did is going to have likelineage shifting ripples in her
life, in the lives of herchildren, and so, like I take
comfort in knowing that that wasmy hard boundary and my

(10:27):
instinct to not jump on thefrenetic bandwagon of needing to
say something immediately andinstead, like I still feel, like
I am learning and will continueto learn about this topic, and

(10:50):
I don't know that I will everfeel qualified enough to teach
about it.
What I am qualified to do ishold space.
I'm qualified to help peoplereally work through some of the
hard questions that they aredealing with, particularly if
they are more directly affectedby this than I am.

(11:10):
It's my role to be inregulation and it's my role to
hold that curious andencouraging and neutral space so
that people can actually dothat and that regulation work
that is required of them.

(11:30):
So I want to share this becauseI think that there are a lot of
ways in which we, as folks whoare showing up online, it feels
like we can never be doingenough, and I want you to know
that.

(11:50):
However you are showing up forthe bigger collective, however,
you are recognizing your owngifts and your own limitations
and your own capacity, for allof this is perfect and it's
nuanced and it is important work.

(12:13):
So that's all I got to sayabout that.