May 1, 2025 • 44 mins
The competitive model of success is collapsing, and for good reason. When we collaborate instead of compete, our organizations see 70% higher job satisfaction and dramatically lower burnout rates. But making this shift requires more than just a change in strategy—it demands a complete nervous system reset.
Collaboration isn't just better for our health and happiness; it's better for business too. Female-led organizations are growing twice as fast as male-led ones precisely because they're embracing collaborative approaches. Rather than focusing on single problems through a competitive lens, collaborative leaders tackle multiple solutions simultaneously, building communities that magnify impact through shared purpose.
This episode unpacks the powerful difference between push-based leadership (driven by cortisol and scarcity) and pull-based leadership (guided by passion and abundance). We explore how both men and women can balance their masculine and feminine energies to become unstoppable forces for positive change. As we share, "Movements are born when women say 'enough,' but they last when women say 'together.'"
Whether you're building a business, leading a team, or simply trying to create more meaningful connections in your life, this conversation offers practical guidance for shifting from competition to co-creation. We share five actionable strategies to help you lead collaboratively, including how to deprogram the scarcity voice that whispers "if I help her, I'll lose my edge."
Remember: your growth isn't measured by who you've passed, but by how deeply you've returned to yourself. The only person you're truly competing with is who you were yesterday. Journal with us on where you might still be operating from competition, who you could uplift today, and what success sourced from synergy (not striving) might feel like in your body and work.
Looking for Empowerment Coaching? Apply to work with Zuri here
Looking for Expansion Coaching? Apply to work with Mike here.
Download the FREE Heart-To-Heart Exercise to deepen your connection here.
Manifest everything you want in your life, using our HoldTheVibe.com course! 5 modules led with audio and video by Mikey and Zuri to help you unlock the magic of manifesting using a simple step-by-step process.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
I'm already laughing.
What.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
I'm just here to tell you, just here to tell you, yes
, that without you I wouldn't beas good as I am with you.
That is the full power ofcollaboration.
I'm going to wait and allow youto say the same thing Go ahead,
go ahead.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Oh, I can't compete with that.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
That's it.
The whole show is aboutcollaboration and competing.
I gave you some cup.
Okay, you're done.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Welcome to the Empowerment Couple Podcast,
where your path to self-masteryexpands.
My co-host is Empowerment.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Coach Zuri Starr and he's expansion coach, Mikey
Starr.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Together we are the Empowerment Couple.
Our mission is simple to serveyou love, so you can make
informed decisions to regain andmaintain your personal power.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
We'll take you on a journey to a life filled with
purpose, passion and limitlesspossibilities, while sharing
stories of transformation,wellness hacks and healthy
habits backed by science andancient wisdom.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Plus, we'll keep you entertained with engaging games,
banter and funny innuendosalong the way.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Each episode is an exciting blend of education,
entertainment and empowerment.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
Designed to help you create a mindset to be a magnet
for more love, happiness andabundance.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Together with our special guests.
We are dedicated to sharinginformation that empowers you to
create your most beautiful lifeA onesie, a twosie, a threesie
your most beautiful life.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
I got nothing.
I got nothing.
You're supposed to saysomething.
I forgot.
I got nothing.
I got nothing.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
You're supposed to say something I forgot.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
I can say something right now that will make you
laugh, and I won't even say it,and you'll still laugh.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
No, I will laugh at the funny face that you make
when you're like don't laugh,and then I'll laugh.
Because I'm right on the vergeof a giggle at all times,
because that's just who I am, soI'll laugh.
Because I'm right on the vergeof a giggle at all times,
because that's just who I am, soI can laugh easily.
From scarcity to synergy we'regoing to talk about why
(02:28):
collaboration is the outdatedmodel of success driven by fear,
scarcity and hyper competition,and offer a powerful
collaborative vision for a newparadigm of leadership.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
This episode is meant to empower visionary leaders,
and especially women, to leadwith love, co-create from
energetic alignment and growthrough proximity rather than
pressure.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
That's the way you're supposed to do it anyways.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
We grow together, not separately.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Right.
What if your next breakthrough,client or collaboration, isn't
a hustle away but a vibrationaway?
Speaker 2 (03:02):
So it's literally thoughts.
Speaker 1 (03:05):
Yeah, it's thoughts, it's your nervous system, it's
your.
How often are you tuning intoyour heart?
and what your heart wants to do,getting into your soul and
purpose work.
So I think let's just share alittle personal story.
So both of us are coaches.
(03:25):
If you're new, if you're notpart of our Empowered Posse, we
are both coaches.
Mike's an expansion coach, I'man empowerment coach, and a lot
of my clients are leaders, andwhat I have found is that
collaboration is always betterthan competition, and what
(03:48):
happens, especially in thebeginning, is that you get
really focused on what everyoneelse is doing and then you start
being competitive just bynature, whether you're male or
female, our culture promotesthat.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Well, one thing that I've noticed, kind of actually
watching your career, is thatone of the reasons why you are
as successful as you are, inboth the food movement and also
coaching, is that you are anatural born collaborator.
Right born collaborator right.
And on top of that, you wereable to seize a tool social
(04:27):
media which is a hugecollaborative tool, and utilize
it and were able to spread thatwealth.
It's not like you held on tothat information.
You actually use thatinformation to empower others,
other leaders, yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
In the beginning of my building of tribes, I would
just have nonstop free sessionsto teach people how to use
social media to organize aroundtheir issue and to empower them
to share as much as possible andcollaborate, and it definitely
was a part of my business model.
(05:02):
Everything was about crowdsharing and like how can I help
you and can you help me?
And we did a lot of barteringand you know way before um, like
the playing field on socialmedia is now pay to play, um,
but there's still collaboration.
There's still opportunity to umcollaborate and not just give
all your money away to meta or,you know, tik TOK or wherever
(05:25):
you are working, youtube.
There's ways to collaborate andif you look at the trajectory
of all social media creators orleaders or people in the space
of really any industry, theycollaborate.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Well, I do believe that the competitive model is
definitely coming to a collapse.
Yes, and we see that we havethe old way, which is to compete
, to win, to dominate, right.
That's how America has kind ofbeen born Hustle, hustle, hustle
right.
And now we're entering aculture where, in order for us
(06:01):
to move forward, we all have towork together right, so that the
hyper-competitive,cortisol-driven leadership is
now starting to fade, which isgreat because, instead of having
these cortisol-drivenleadership models where you're
just bound to burn out right,you have more opportunities
(06:25):
where one can actually utilizethe strength of the group and
therefore also celebrate thestrengths of themselves at the
same time.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Right, which is like a lot of fight or flight.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
Yeah, exactly so.
You know, it's a removal of thescarcity mindset and an
inclusion now into the mindsetthat there is enough for
everyone, right?
And you know, also, which Ilove to see is that you have
more and more women stepping up.
So there's, the male-dominatedindustries are now starting to
(06:59):
get saturated with this new,fresh energy.
Where it is no longer dominate,win, compete.
It's more like hey, we can alldo this together.
It's all inclusive, exactly,it's all inclusive.
(07:30):
Exactly.
There was a 2020 study in theJournal of Organizational
Behavior, and they found outthat competitive work cultures
increased burnout by 52%, whilecollaborative cultures increased
retention and job satisfactionby over 70%.
Right, so it's like that's theway to go.
You know, fear createsshort-term wins, but long-term
depletion yes, right.
Speaker 1 (07:41):
Long-term depletion.
That's what we want to avoidAwesome.
Well, let's look at theenergetics of collaboration.
So if you take proximity andyou add alignment, you will get
expansion.
When we collaborate from aplace of resonance, we can
really collapse time.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
And I like that concept of collapsing time.
I mean when you have one personreaching for that top pinnacle,
it's going to take time.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Right, it's going to take so much time, whereas the
minute you collaborate, you joinefforts of everyone's
experience, and what could take10, 15 join efforts of
everyone's experience, and whatcould take 10, 15 years could
literally be done overnight.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
Right, right.
And so mirror neurons meancollaboration literally boosts
oxytocin, aka the bondingchemical.
So collaborative environmentsthey lower cortisol, they
increase trust and they createpsychological safety, all of
which then boosts performanceand innovation.
There's another study out ofHarvard Business Review that
(08:43):
reports that high-trustcollaborative teams show 50%
more productivity, 76% moreengagement and 106% more energy
at work.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I like that 106 percent.
It's like that extra sixpercent.
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
Yeah, there is this great quote.
It's like an unknown quote, butI love.
I think about this a lot whenI'm in collaboration, which is
often with clients andcoalitions that I'm in.
You can't compete with me.
I want us both to win.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
That's that's beautiful.
Yeah, I should tattoo that onmy arm.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
But Because collaboration is a nervous
system strategy as much as it isa business one.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Yeah, most certainly.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
When we win and when we operate from, let's say, pull
, like you're being pulled by apassion versus push.
You will obviously get so muchfurther in whatever mission
you've created, whatever yourpurpose work is.
If you're constantly pushingyourself to do the thing, then
(09:49):
you're going to burn out.
But if you are being driven bya pull from the universe like a
calling, you're going to havesuch a better experience and you
want to work with people whohave that same mission.
Like I always say, when I amworking with different clients
and I'm like you know who maybeare hiring, it's like always
(10:11):
hire the most passionate person,because passion cannot be
taught.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
No.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
And you can teach a passionate person anything and
they will actually want to learnon their own and become the
best at it because they havepassion.
And it's also why I teachclients how to have fun so that
they can call in more flow andof abundance, wealth, divine
wisdom and wellness.
More flow and of like abundance, wealth, divine wisdom and
(10:39):
wellness.
Like if you have more fun inyour environment and you make
your pursuit, yourentrepreneurial pursuit, fun,
it's all going to flow.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
And how you make it fun of course how you make it
fun is is is to go from awinning concept, which is an
ego-based concept, and you bringit all the way back down to the
heart, and the heart is goingto allow you to collaborate.
It's going to be more.
That's what the oxytocin is allabout right.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
Yeah, so it also brings it back when we were
talking about social media.
I always tell clients this isnot about collection, this is
about connection.
If you use social media not asa numbers game but as a
connection game, you're A goingto feel so much more fulfilled.
You're not going to be watchingfor how many likes, views et
(11:24):
cetera that you have, and you'rejust going to be looking for
the moments that you have inconnection, connection points.
Because the truth is that theonly person I'm competing with
is who I was yesterday.
And the same is true for you.
That is straight up, Becauseyeah, your growth isn't measured
by who you've passed, but howdeeply you've returned to
(11:47):
yourself.
Boom shakalaka.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
That is beautiful.
That is beautiful, you knowwhat?
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I think it's time for a game.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
I think it's time for a game.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
Yeah, we're cruising right into the game zone.
This game is called you Versusyou, because that's, that's
really everything right, yeah,you versus you.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
And we're not talking about sheep, we're talking
about you as a person.
We're ewes, or?
Speaker 1 (12:08):
sheep.
Okay, um, competitive youversus collaborative you.
We'll do this little spin thatmeets our show, where we are
looking to go.
So, as I was just saying, theonly competition is you versus
you, but we're going to play, sowe are going to shift the
pattern, align the frequency andchoose your next level self,
(12:38):
level, self.
So this is a reflectiveside-by-side game that will help
us explore how you show up whenoperating from competition,
which is like fear and ego,versus collaboration, which is
like heart, love, soul, and whatwe're going to do is there's
three steps.
So there's going to be thecompetitive view, the
collaborative view, and yourembodiment, challenge or your
habit, you know, your newstandard.
That's going to kind of lock itin.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
Where the rubber hits the road.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Right, so it might be a belief, a behavior or
energetic pattern.
And the challenge then you knowthe embodiment challenge.
It will ask you to upgrade toyour.
You know your next level.
Your higher self, yeah, yeahyeah, so here's some common
themes that we see with ourclients and even in our
(13:21):
community struggle with.
So I'm going to start withnervous system, because that's a
huge one.
All of our clients have that.
All of our clients have that andI'm going to use myself so
competitive me believed thatrest was equals laziness.
(13:41):
Okay.
Competitive me I was like, oh,I'll sleep when I'm dead.
I'm not joking.
I used to say that shit, sleepwhen I'm dead.
I used to say, um, like, oh, Idon't really need a lot of sleep
and I would, you know, bethinking about winning.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
And on top of that I've also seen you with that
little adrenaline.
You know when you get a superdownload you'll go another 10,
15 hours on top of a regularworkday.
I'm like sorry you got to stop.
Speaker 1 (14:09):
Yeah, and you're like I can't, I got to keep going.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
I got to download.
I was like keep going.
I got to download.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
It's like okay, yeah.
And also I will say that Iwould also apologize or make
excuses when I did need to rest,because I would basically burn
out.
And then I'd be like I don'tknow what's wrong with me, maybe
it's this and I would literallyexplain myself into like not
feeling well, but also make surethat whoever I was around knew
like oh, I'm still okay, I'mjust exhausted.
(14:36):
But I'm not going to say I'mexhausted.
I don't know why I'm so tired,knowing full well that I spent
like 24 hours working my ass off.
So that's the competitive methat I have since let go of.
The collaborative me would belike no panicking, pausing, just
pause.
Like I pause much, much moreoften, and so what I've learned
(14:58):
to embody the practice is that Ilet myself rest to receive.
So I often say like rest,breathe and receive.
Like old me would have panicked.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
new me breathes aligns and I choose differently
and let me tell you once you,you uh, have command of your
nervous system.
Like your whole world opens up,it's lovely, yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
and why nervous system is so important is that
you can only attract what youalign to.
So, with my clients, I'm oftenteaching them wellness habits so
that their nervous system is ina place where they can attract
the big dream that they have.
So another one is leadership.
Do you want to take that one?
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Yeah, I'm doing leadership and again, just like
a nervous system, a lot of myclients are high ranking in
their fields and when it comesto leadership, they're having
issues with how to move forwardwithout burning out.
So, with that competitive self,they'll be asking things or
saying things.
Like you know, if I stop,they're going to take my spot
(16:02):
right.
You get that Jones effect right, whereas the collaborative me
would be like you know what.
There's space for us all.
My power grows when others risewith me, right, and I've said-.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
So you're coaching them in that way I'm coaching
them.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Yeah, the best leader knows how to delegate, and when
you don't know how to delegate,you're literally expanding your
reach.
Right, you're using-.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Automate delegate or eliminate.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
Exactly right.
So the challenge, of course,would be in your office, in your
field, on your team, see who'sdoing a good job and, instead of
looking at them in envy andtrying to take them down, give
them some kudos.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
Yeah, yeah.
Celebrate them, because thetruth is is that nobody can take
your spot.
There's nobody, that's you, andso, really, you are only
competing with the version thatyou were yesterday.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
Correct, and when you do that, do this practice.
It literally opens you up toyour greatness.
Exactly Then you have anopportunity to shine.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
Yes, yes, yes, I love it.
Okay, one thing that I see overand over again there's a
pattern about ideas andcreativity.
Oh God, yes, yes and so I wouldsay that the clients that have
challenges with that they willbe like and I really resonate
with this because I definitelyrecognize that I had some of
(17:23):
this happening in my earlystages of just being an
entrepreneur is that you wouldcome up with an idea and then
all of a sudden, somebody elsehas the same idea, yeah, or
similar, because we're allsharing consciousness.
Like there's no such thing asoriginal thought and we're all
connected, you know.
But that doesn't soothe yoursoul when you're in that feeling
(17:44):
of scarcity.
So the competitive versionwould be that was my idea first
and then the collaborativeversion would be like great
minds, sync up, let's buildsomething better together.
Because the truth is, like yousaid, you can collapse time, so
might as well collaborate.
(18:04):
Okay, so then the embodimentchallenge for that would be like
invite someone to co-create apiece of content or collab on
like an Instagram reel.
Co-create a piece of content orcollab on like an Instagram
reel.
Speaker 2 (18:21):
Like somebody who's in your field, like you know.
Raise their shine and you knowyou'll win together.
Yeah, we're essentially askingyou to do the exact opposite of
crabs in a bucket, right?
Yes, let's allow all the crabsin the bucket to lift that crab
up.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (18:32):
And then once that crab's up, that crab can kind of
pull everyone out right.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
Yeah, because that's where the happiness actually
lives is, when you all wintogether and like.
You will do a lot of sufferingif you do crabs in a bucket,
like for sure.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
Well, another.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
What about money?
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Oh my God, and I was going to say.
Another field really is moneyand business.
Okay, All of our clients areout there, they're making money
and a lot of them are still kindof functioning in that
competitive mindset right wherethey need to outsell everyone,
they need to get that promotionand in corporate, that makes a
(19:12):
lot of sense.
However, you can stillincorporate a collaborative
mindset and instead ofcompetitive me would say
something like I need to outselleveryone.
This launch and collaborativeme would be something like the
collaborative me would be myaligned clients always find me
(19:34):
and there's more than enough forall of us and that's the honest
truth and it feels better tosay that and it opens up all of
the chakras in order to makethat actually happen.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
So it's amazing and it's the truth, like lack and
limitation will give you thatand expansiveness will give you
that, and it's true.
I mean, if you think about howmany billions of people there
are on this planet and you haveone launch, chances are you're
going to align with your peopleif you are not looking at
(20:07):
conquer status.
You know if you're not havingthat energy of like I have to
crush this or else everything isover.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
It has to be a waterfall instead of a trickle.
It all starts with a trickle.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
It starts with a trickle.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Well, a good challenge for this would be to
reach out to a peer and ask howyou can support their next
launch or their next endeavor Bepart of their come up.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
Yep, and you know in the beginning be a supporting
character Be an affiliate, forexample.
Be something where you aregoing to learn and you're going
to grow in your own way.
Don't be afraid to do that.
Visibility is a crazy one, sobeing seen essentially.
So I'm going to do that.
(20:50):
Competitive me.
So competitive me would havefeared judgment, rejection and I
would have hid gifts, like notwilling to share the gifts that
I have.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
You're not talking about the gifts that you got at
your store.
You're talking about the innategifts that need to come out,
yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
All of us are given gifts, you know, and we have to
choose if we want to be fullyseen with those gifts.
Correct, so collaborative me.
Where I would be collaborativewith the universe essentially is
that I could show up moreauthentically not perfectly, and
show up with a lot of honesty,like radical honesty.
(21:39):
I think that is verycollaborative because then you
will meet people where they alsohave shown up, maybe in their
own honest journey.
Right, and also like we haveenough people pretending to be
perfect and that isn't going tohelp someone expand.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Correct.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
You know, no.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
You're looking at me like no no, no, I'm right there
with you.
I feel like there is aperfection is most certainly a.
It's a disease, right?
It keeps you from actuallymoving forward is most certainly
a disease, right, it keeps youfrom actually moving forward.
And if you look at someone andyou see someone else's
perfection, the next thing youdo when you look at yourself is
(22:24):
you see all your imperfections.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
Yeah, for sure.
So the embodiment challenge forvisibility or being seen would
be to share something that youonce kept hidden, which is kind
of popular on social media Now.
People are like, oh, you know,instagram versus real life or
you know, they'll show like aphoto of them before they
photoshopped it.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
I was gonna say.
I was gonna say, do a couple ofposts with no filters.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
Yeah.
I mean if you just share sometype of truth where you have
maybe been hiding yourself frombeing seen, maybe something that
you're struggling with, you'llfind that you open the door to
other people who are also havingthat.
Or if you share something thathappened in the past that you've
overcome, it helps people seeyou as an authority on that
(23:11):
issue and it can be reallyconnection building.
So again, building thatconnection.
But I mean, are you having funplaying this game?
Speaker 2 (23:20):
I'm having a lot of fun.
I have my last one and ofcourse it is going to be about
relationships.
Everyone has relationshipissues, right?
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Whether it's a romantic relationship or a work
relationship.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
We are just full of relationships I mean I guess you
could also extend torelationships that you have with
a pet, but you know, it dependson how deep into that pet
you're getting right.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
But your life is dependent on the quality of your
relationships.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
That is correct.
That is correct.
So you know, the oldcompetitive-based mindset or me
would say something like shethinks that she is better than
me, right?
So right then, and there you'retalking about power, struggling
, you're talking about fightingto win.
Or one dominates the other.
And the new collaborative me isgoing to say something like she
(24:09):
is inspiring me to do betterthan I did before, right?
Which is creating a win-winscenario.
It's peace versus justice,right?
So now you're in a positionwhere you can share your
strengths and wins versus vyingto see who's gonna be the
quarterback.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Yeah Right, we versus me.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
We versus me.
That's the way to go.
So what I would do for theembodiment challenge is end a
fight with a peaceful phrasesuch as what can we do to find a
peaceful solution to this issue?
Speaker 1 (24:42):
Boom, I love it.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Right then.
And there you go, from winningand fighting to win to being
like okay, how can we arrive atthis at the same time?
Right, that's a win-winscenario.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
So the next segment we're going to talk about is the
feminine shift in leadership.
So there's definitely a rise ofcyclical, creative,
community-led movements,powerful women stepping forward
and leading the change.
(25:18):
And not only women, but men whohave balanced their masculine
and feminine are able to make astronger impact with connection
and it's more fulfilling right.
So those that have balanced themasculine and feminine energy
which, all again, all males andfemales have it all.
(25:39):
All humans are born with bothenergies, both sides of us,
right, and so when we find thatbalance, we can be unstoppable.
Um, but if we're just talkingabout women, I I found this
great quote in Forbes that saidfemale-led businesses are
growing twice as fast asmale-led ones.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
I can tell you why.
Speaker 1 (26:02):
Yeah, tell me.
Speaker 2 (26:03):
I can tell you why Because when you compete, you
compete to, and when you'recompeting, you're focusing on
one problem, right.
When you are collaborating,you're focusing on multiple
solutions at the same time,right.
So a female-led business thatis focused in on solutions is
going to get further alongfaster and gather more strength
(26:25):
than someone who is justfocusing on their problems.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
Because women are choosing to create a community.
There's a lot of give and take,and what I would say is that
feminine leadership isn't reallyeven about gender.
It's about intuition, inclusion, interdependence, and it can be
, you know, a male that isbalanced, and masculine and
(26:51):
feminine, using that, thatstrategy, as the way that they
lead, you know, for theirleadership abilities.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
And I mean I've, you've, you've had clients in
the past who have been female,who have been stuck in male
roles, who are having a hardtime making that switch and it
and it's.
It's simply because the, theworkforce is still focused on
that mindset.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Yeah, they're still focused on the push through and
climb the corporate ladder andyou're just constantly pushing a
boulder up a hill.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
And how wonderful that we are now coming to an age
where we can reverse that.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
Yeah, I feel like the era is collaborative.
People say, oh, the future isfeminine and we're in like the
age of aquarius.
But I just want to reiteratethat both male and female
genders, you know, are anygender essentially, in these
times, you know, everyone isnecessary.
Like, if you look at nature,there's an ecosystem and each
(27:57):
person, each, each, you knowentity, each microorganism, like
everything, plays a specificpart, and the same is true as
that, you know, in my business.
I find that if a woman isbalanced and masculine and
feminine, she's unstoppable.
And same goes for men.
And if men are just looking atwomen and thinking negative
(28:20):
about women, and if women arelooking negative at men, like
you're losing energy.
First of all, you're definitelysuffering because there's no
escaping a man and there's noescaping a woman, and so we have
to come together and unify.
And so what?
I have been in a lot ofmovement conversations, and so I
(28:43):
wanted to say that movementsreally are born in moments, and
currently a lot of the movementsthat I'm involved in are with
women, and it's when women sayenough, but they last when women
say together.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
That's so beautiful, and I'm getting the imagery of
going from a male-dominatedscenario or system to a
female-dominated, and in orderto do that, you have a full
glass of water, and that's male,and you have an empty glass of
water, and that's female.
And in order to go from one tothe next, you actually have to
(29:22):
take that energy from the maleand dip it in right.
So there is going to be atransference of energy from the
male to the female, right.
So it's not that females are onthe rise.
It is what we're trying to dois balance it out.
And in order to balance it out,we have to re-engage and
re-engage the feminine and allowthe feminine to heal the
(29:45):
masculine, and then we have thatpowerful balance.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
Right, and I think, especially in this era, in the
US specifically, we have so muchpolarity, much polarity.
So much division, that men andwomen are also being pit against
each other, and not just race,but gender and skin color and
(30:15):
all the things are being pitagainst each other when really
our true power comes fromunification.
Our true power comes fromcollaboration.
True power comes fromunification.
True power comes fromcollaboration.
But feminine leadershipredefines power not as control
but as co-creation.
Because, women, we are creators.
Obviously we give life, but weare naturally creative beings.
We came here to create, andbeing creative means figuring
(30:38):
out how to be collaborative.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
And the benefit of being a co-creator is that that
gives you so much change, right.
It gives you so much movement.
It allows you to move forwardwithout having to drag the old
weights of behind, which are allyour masculine win, win, win,
competitive, competitive,competitive.
Because that's done, we don'tneed that anymore, right, right,
(31:03):
so let us allow that to be gone.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
Yes, I'm on board for that.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
The truth is, the compete, dominate, outsell
paradigm is coming to an end.
Speaker 1 (31:17):
It's outdated.
Speaker 2 (31:18):
It's super outdated.
Speaker 1 (31:19):
And the new model is collaborate, expand, amplify,
because, as conscious coachesand leaders, we want to amplify
others.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
And you and I are particularly in a field where
there really shouldn't be anycompetition.
We are all trying to do thesame thing.
There shouldn't be anycompetition.
No Right, we are all trying todo the same thing uplift
humanity.
So there shouldn't becompetition between coaches.
But we also see that in otherindustries.
Speaker 1 (31:47):
All industries, it's just.
It's part of human nature too,because there's you know, part
of our brain that you know istrying to survive and we are in.
Obviously we've outgrown thesaber-toothed tiger.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
So like we can thrive together.
I like what you say in regardsto the collaborate, expand and
amplify.
I mean, power doesn't decreasewhen it's shared, it multiplies
Right.
So if you are participating insomething that's positive, it
doesn't matter if you are theperson who's going to catch the
winning touchdown or any of that, as long as you are part of the
process, you're beautiful,you're in the go.
Speaker 1 (32:29):
Right, you still get the Super Bowl ring.
Speaker 2 (32:30):
Exactly, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
Scarcity says protect your throne.
Collaboration says build alonger table.
Speaker 2 (32:38):
Build a longer table, and that is what you've been
doing your whole career.
You're just building this hugetable.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
And when I was interviewed recently, they asked
me a question about like, ohwell, what if somebody comes to
the issue in this way?
It's like I don't care If theywant to come to table for any
reason any way, we will sit withthem and we to table with for
any reason any, any way.
Like we will sit with them andwe will talk with them, because
the truth is, if somebody getsinspired, I don't care why they
(33:06):
came, I don't care why they cameto send in my business, like
we're here for a movement, we'rehere for a mission and
everyone's welcome, yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
As long as the job's done.
And one thing I'll say aboutyou is that you know,
collaboration is, it's in yourbiology and it's your blueprint
and it's everyone's blueprint.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
It's everyone's.
Speaker 2 (33:25):
Yeah, it's my blueprint, it's your blueprint.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
Like just with us, empowered Posse, just breathe.
That in Collaboration is inyour biology and your blueprint.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
Like you have the ability to collaborate.
You don't have to compete.
Speaker 1 (33:41):
Right, and we are all tribal beings.
We all worked in tribes.
If we're going to really lookat our brain, we thrive when we
are in community and when we arein proximity to people who are
on the same mission, right?
All right are on the samemission right, all right.
So next segment I want to getinto is five ways to lead from
(34:03):
collaboration, not competition.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
That's it.
That's all you need.
That's it.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
Okay.
So, number one, you're going tocelebrate others publicly.
So instead of comparison orwhatever judgment, or they're
further ahead than me, orwhatever the energy is right
Like instead of comparison,offer amplification.
Speaker 2 (34:28):
I love that.
Instead of hate, give hugs.
So number two join or createsacred circles or masterminds.
Why is this?
Because proximity breedselevation.
Right, we want to elevate, wewant to.
That connective process liftseveryone up.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
And I would just say, to mirror that is that you
don't want to be the smartestperson in the room.
You want the people in yourproximity to really challenge
you, to make you expand, and soI love that.
Create those sacred circles yo.
Speaker 2 (35:05):
What's number three?
Speaker 1 (35:06):
Number three is deprogram the scarcity voice.
Okay, so here's the scarcityvoice.
I'm going to tell you what itsounds like.
It sounds like if I help her,I'll lose my edge.
And what I want you tochallenge that voice with is, if
I rise with her, we all risefaster.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
And that's the truth.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
It's the truth.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
That is the truth.
That's all you got to say.
Number four co-create offers orevents, right.
So we want you to lean intopartnerships, right?
We want you to be excited aboutshared energy, and shared
energy is expanded reach right.
So collaborate, collaborate,collaborate and you'll see your
brand just grow and grow andgrow.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
And number five, choose coaches who model
collaboration.
If their success is built ondominance.
Ask yourself is that my path?
Because whatever you learn, youwill embody, especially with a
coach.
Yeah, you will repeat, you willmirror that.
And so really ask yourself isthat your path?
(36:10):
Do you want to be part of anold paradigm that no longer
serves you?
The fulfillment of being onthis planet at this time.
Speaker 2 (36:19):
I wouldn't want to.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
No.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
Let me answer for you .
No, the answer is no.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
The answer is no.
The truth is true.
Success isn't built in silos.
It's co-authored by souls inalignment.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
Souls in alignment, and that is literally the
definition of collaboration.
Right, it's being in alignmentwith another soul.
Speaker 1 (36:42):
Right.
Speaker 2 (36:43):
So a quick recap right, competition divides and
collaboration expands.
Let me tell you, you alwayswant to expand, you always want
to expand.
Speaker 1 (36:51):
You're growing or dying.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Exactly so.
Choose collaboration as yournervous system strategy, wealth
building model and leadershipphilosophy yes, collaborate your
way, all the way to the top.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
It is how I've built all my businesses and how I've
built coalitions that havesucceeded.
Speaker 2 (37:09):
I'll go so far as to say that if your business is
struggling, it's probablybecause you are competing with
someone that you shouldn't be.
You should be working with them.
Speaker 1 (37:20):
You're sometimes probably competing with yourself
because it's you versus you.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
Yes, that is correct.
Speaker 1 (37:25):
So here's a journal prompt because you might need to
dig a little and figure outwhat's actually going on,
because you might be like, oh no, none of this is me.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
And if you're not journaling journal Journaling is
receipt that you are makingprogress.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
Yes, so here's a journal prompt.
Where am I still operating fromcompetition or fear of not
being enough?
Speaker 2 (37:50):
I got one.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
Oh, you got one.
Speaker 2 (37:52):
I got one who in my life or network could I uplift
or co-create with today?
Speaker 1 (38:01):
I like that.
Should I do one more?
Yes, why not Okay?
Speaker 2 (38:06):
Power of three.
Speaker 1 (38:07):
What would it feel like to embody success that's
sourced from synergy, notstriving?
Speaker 2 (38:15):
Sourced from synergy.
Speaker 1 (38:18):
Yes, baby.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
You are a songwriter, aren't you?
Speaker 1 (38:20):
Align it, align it honey, you got to say it so
people remember it.
Sourced from synergy.
Not striving, let's go yo.
Okay, well, we hope you enjoyedthis episode.
We are sending you the highestvibrations.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
You are held.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
You are loved.
I mean, I could try, butcollaborating with you is the
funnest part of my week andobviously my best collaboration
with you.
(38:57):
Obviously, my bestcollaboration with you is our
child, that is correct.
So without you I wouldn't havecollaboration that I feel is
worth more than anything in theworld.
Speaker 2 (39:13):
That was well done.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
You're welcome.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
Good job.
Speaker 1 (39:16):
Okay, now do me I just did you Again.
Speaker 2 (39:20):
Here's the reason why I like to collaborate with Zuri
Star Because she has magic inher bloodstream.
Speaker 1 (39:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (39:29):
And I like magic.
Speaker 1 (39:31):
I love magic.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
I love magic Okay we're good.
And then it's my turn Go ahead.
Speaker 1 (39:36):
Here's why I like to collaborate with Michael Starr
yeah, yeah, yeah, Because hemakes me laugh and he's a real
motherfucker.
Speaker 2 (39:50):
That's that.
That's that.
Get your finger off the button.
Get your finger off the button.
That's that mirror.
Speaker 1 (39:58):
Good day, sir we're good, we're good, we're good.
You can Silencio.
Speaker 2 (40:08):
Do not hang up on me how dare you.
Speaker 1 (40:12):
Okay, this is a two-hour podcast, okay.
Okay.
Let's compete and see who doesbetter.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
Let's collaborate.
The end the show will end inthree, two no-transcript.
I'm already laughing.
What.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
I'm just here to tell you, just here to tell you, yes
, that without you I wouldn't beas good as I am with you.
That is the full power ofcollaboration.
I'm going to wait and allow youto say the same thing Go ahead,
go ahead.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Oh, I can't compete with that.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
That's it.
The whole show is aboutcollaboration and competing.
I gave you some cup.
Okay, you're done.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Welcome to the Empowerment Couple Podcast,
where your path to self-masteryexpands.
My co-host is Empowerment.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Coach Zuri Starr and he's expansion coach, Mikey
Starr.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Together we are the Empowerment Couple.
Our mission is simple to serveyou love, so you can make
informed decisions to regain andmaintain your personal power.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
We'll take you on a journey to a life filled with
purpose, passion and limitlesspossibilities, while sharing
stories of transformation,wellness hacks and healthy
habits backed by science andancient wisdom.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Plus, we'll keep you entertained with engaging games,
banter and funny innuendosalong the way.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Each episode is an exciting blend of education,
entertainment and empowerment.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
Designed to help you create a mindset to be a magnet
for more love, happiness andabundance.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Together with our special guests.
We are dedicated to sharinginformation that empowers you to
create your most beautiful lifeA onesie, a twosie, a threesie
your most beautiful life.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
I got nothing.
I got nothing.
You're supposed to saysomething.
I forgot.
I got nothing.
I got nothing.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
You're supposed to say something I forgot.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
I can say something right now that will make you
laugh, and I won't even say it,and you'll still laugh.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
No, I will laugh at the funny face that you make
when you're like don't laugh,and then I'll laugh.
Because I'm right on the vergeof a giggle at all times,
because that's just who I am, soI'll laugh.
Because I'm right on the vergeof a giggle at all times,
because that's just who I am, soI can laugh easily.
From scarcity to synergy we'regoing to talk about why
(02:28):
collaboration is the outdatedmodel of success driven by fear,
scarcity and hyper competition,and offer a powerful
collaborative vision for a newparadigm of leadership.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
This episode is meant to empower visionary leaders,
and especially women, to leadwith love, co-create from
energetic alignment and growthrough proximity rather than
pressure.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
That's the way you're supposed to do it anyways.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
We grow together, not separately.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Right.
What if your next breakthrough,client or collaboration, isn't
a hustle away but a vibrationaway?
Speaker 2 (03:02):
So it's literally thoughts.
Speaker 1 (03:05):
Yeah, it's thoughts, it's your nervous system, it's
your.
How often are you tuning intoyour heart?
and what your heart wants to do,getting into your soul and
purpose work.
So I think let's just share alittle personal story.
So both of us are coaches.
(03:25):
If you're new, if you're notpart of our Empowered Posse, we
are both coaches.
Mike's an expansion coach, I'man empowerment coach, and a lot
of my clients are leaders, andwhat I have found is that
collaboration is always betterthan competition, and what
(03:48):
happens, especially in thebeginning, is that you get
really focused on what everyoneelse is doing and then you start
being competitive just bynature, whether you're male or
female, our culture promotesthat.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Well, one thing that I've noticed, kind of actually
watching your career, is thatone of the reasons why you are
as successful as you are, inboth the food movement and also
coaching, is that you are anatural born collaborator.
Right born collaborator right.
And on top of that, you wereable to seize a tool social
(04:27):
media which is a hugecollaborative tool, and utilize
it and were able to spread thatwealth.
It's not like you held on tothat information.
You actually use thatinformation to empower others,
other leaders, yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
In the beginning of my building of tribes, I would
just have nonstop free sessionsto teach people how to use
social media to organize aroundtheir issue and to empower them
to share as much as possible andcollaborate, and it definitely
was a part of my business model.
(05:02):
Everything was about crowdsharing and like how can I help
you and can you help me?
And we did a lot of barteringand you know way before um, like
the playing field on socialmedia is now pay to play, um,
but there's still collaboration.
There's still opportunity to umcollaborate and not just give
all your money away to meta or,you know, tik TOK or wherever
(05:25):
you are working, youtube.
There's ways to collaborate andif you look at the trajectory
of all social media creators orleaders or people in the space
of really any industry, theycollaborate.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Well, I do believe that the competitive model is
definitely coming to a collapse.
Yes, and we see that we havethe old way, which is to compete
, to win, to dominate, right.
That's how America has kind ofbeen born Hustle, hustle, hustle
right.
And now we're entering aculture where, in order for us
(06:01):
to move forward, we all have towork together right, so that the
hyper-competitive,cortisol-driven leadership is
now starting to fade, which isgreat because, instead of having
these cortisol-drivenleadership models where you're
just bound to burn out right,you have more opportunities
(06:25):
where one can actually utilizethe strength of the group and
therefore also celebrate thestrengths of themselves at the
same time.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Right, which is like a lot of fight or flight.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
Yeah, exactly so.
You know, it's a removal of thescarcity mindset and an
inclusion now into the mindsetthat there is enough for
everyone, right?
And you know, also, which Ilove to see is that you have
more and more women stepping up.
So there's, the male-dominatedindustries are now starting to
(06:59):
get saturated with this new,fresh energy.
Where it is no longer dominate,win, compete.
It's more like hey, we can alldo this together.
It's all inclusive, exactly,it's all inclusive.
(07:30):
Exactly.
There was a 2020 study in theJournal of Organizational
Behavior, and they found outthat competitive work cultures
increased burnout by 52%, whilecollaborative cultures increased
retention and job satisfactionby over 70%.
Right, so it's like that's theway to go.
You know, fear createsshort-term wins, but long-term
depletion yes, right.
Speaker 1 (07:41):
Long-term depletion.
That's what we want to avoidAwesome.
Well, let's look at theenergetics of collaboration.
So if you take proximity andyou add alignment, you will get
expansion.
When we collaborate from aplace of resonance, we can
really collapse time.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
And I like that concept of collapsing time.
I mean when you have one personreaching for that top pinnacle,
it's going to take time.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Right, it's going to take so much time, whereas the
minute you collaborate, you joinefforts of everyone's
experience, and what could take10, 15 join efforts of
everyone's experience, and whatcould take 10, 15 years could
literally be done overnight.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
Right, right.
And so mirror neurons meancollaboration literally boosts
oxytocin, aka the bondingchemical.
So collaborative environmentsthey lower cortisol, they
increase trust and they createpsychological safety, all of
which then boosts performanceand innovation.
There's another study out ofHarvard Business Review that
(08:43):
reports that high-trustcollaborative teams show 50%
more productivity, 76% moreengagement and 106% more energy
at work.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I like that 106 percent.
It's like that extra sixpercent.
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
Yeah, there is this great quote.
It's like an unknown quote, butI love.
I think about this a lot whenI'm in collaboration, which is
often with clients andcoalitions that I'm in.
You can't compete with me.
I want us both to win.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
That's that's beautiful.
Yeah, I should tattoo that onmy arm.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
But Because collaboration is a nervous
system strategy as much as it isa business one.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Yeah, most certainly.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
When we win and when we operate from, let's say, pull
, like you're being pulled by apassion versus push.
You will obviously get so muchfurther in whatever mission
you've created, whatever yourpurpose work is.
If you're constantly pushingyourself to do the thing, then
(09:49):
you're going to burn out.
But if you are being driven bya pull from the universe like a
calling, you're going to havesuch a better experience and you
want to work with people whohave that same mission.
Like I always say, when I amworking with different clients
and I'm like you know who maybeare hiring, it's like always
(10:11):
hire the most passionate person,because passion cannot be
taught.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
No.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
And you can teach a passionate person anything and
they will actually want to learnon their own and become the
best at it because they havepassion.
And it's also why I teachclients how to have fun so that
they can call in more flow andof abundance, wealth, divine
wisdom and wellness.
More flow and of like abundance, wealth, divine wisdom and
(10:39):
wellness.
Like if you have more fun inyour environment and you make
your pursuit, yourentrepreneurial pursuit, fun,
it's all going to flow.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
And how you make it fun of course how you make it
fun is is is to go from awinning concept, which is an
ego-based concept, and you bringit all the way back down to the
heart, and the heart is goingto allow you to collaborate.
It's going to be more.
That's what the oxytocin is allabout right.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
Yeah, so it also brings it back when we were
talking about social media.
I always tell clients this isnot about collection, this is
about connection.
If you use social media not asa numbers game but as a
connection game, you're A goingto feel so much more fulfilled.
You're not going to be watchingfor how many likes, views et
(11:24):
cetera that you have, and you'rejust going to be looking for
the moments that you have inconnection, connection points.
Because the truth is that theonly person I'm competing with
is who I was yesterday.
And the same is true for you.
That is straight up, Becauseyeah, your growth isn't measured
by who you've passed, but howdeeply you've returned to
(11:47):
yourself.
Boom shakalaka.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
That is beautiful.
That is beautiful, you knowwhat?
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I think it's time for a game.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
I think it's time for a game.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
Yeah, we're cruising right into the game zone.
This game is called you Versusyou, because that's, that's
really everything right, yeah,you versus you.
Speaker 2 (12:04):
And we're not talking about sheep, we're talking
about you as a person.
We're ewes, or?
Speaker 1 (12:08):
sheep.
Okay, um, competitive youversus collaborative you.
We'll do this little spin thatmeets our show, where we are
looking to go.
So, as I was just saying, theonly competition is you versus
you, but we're going to play, sowe are going to shift the
pattern, align the frequency andchoose your next level self,
(12:38):
level, self.
So this is a reflectiveside-by-side game that will help
us explore how you show up whenoperating from competition,
which is like fear and ego,versus collaboration, which is
like heart, love, soul, and whatwe're going to do is there's
three steps.
So there's going to be thecompetitive view, the
collaborative view, and yourembodiment, challenge or your
habit, you know, your newstandard.
That's going to kind of lock itin.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
Where the rubber hits the road.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Right, so it might be a belief, a behavior or
energetic pattern.
And the challenge then you knowthe embodiment challenge.
It will ask you to upgrade toyour.
You know your next level.
Your higher self, yeah, yeahyeah, so here's some common
themes that we see with ourclients and even in our
(13:21):
community struggle with.
So I'm going to start withnervous system, because that's a
huge one.
All of our clients have that.
All of our clients have that andI'm going to use myself so
competitive me believed thatrest was equals laziness.
(13:41):
Okay.
Competitive me I was like, oh,I'll sleep when I'm dead.
I'm not joking.
I used to say that shit, sleepwhen I'm dead.
I used to say, um, like, oh, Idon't really need a lot of sleep
and I would, you know, bethinking about winning.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
And on top of that I've also seen you with that
little adrenaline.
You know when you get a superdownload you'll go another 10,
15 hours on top of a regularworkday.
I'm like sorry you got to stop.
Speaker 1 (14:09):
Yeah, and you're like I can't, I got to keep going.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
I got to download.
I was like keep going.
I got to download.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
It's like okay, yeah.
And also I will say that Iwould also apologize or make
excuses when I did need to rest,because I would basically burn
out.
And then I'd be like I don'tknow what's wrong with me, maybe
it's this and I would literallyexplain myself into like not
feeling well, but also make surethat whoever I was around knew
like oh, I'm still okay, I'mjust exhausted.
(14:36):
But I'm not going to say I'mexhausted.
I don't know why I'm so tired,knowing full well that I spent
like 24 hours working my ass off.
So that's the competitive methat I have since let go of.
The collaborative me would belike no panicking, pausing, just
pause.
Like I pause much, much moreoften, and so what I've learned
(14:58):
to embody the practice is that Ilet myself rest to receive.
So I often say like rest,breathe and receive.
Like old me would have panicked.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
new me breathes aligns and I choose differently
and let me tell you once you,you uh, have command of your
nervous system.
Like your whole world opens up,it's lovely, yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
and why nervous system is so important is that
you can only attract what youalign to.
So, with my clients, I'm oftenteaching them wellness habits so
that their nervous system is ina place where they can attract
the big dream that they have.
So another one is leadership.
Do you want to take that one?
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Yeah, I'm doing leadership and again, just like
a nervous system, a lot of myclients are high ranking in
their fields and when it comesto leadership, they're having
issues with how to move forwardwithout burning out.
So, with that competitive self,they'll be asking things or
saying things.
Like you know, if I stop,they're going to take my spot
(16:02):
right.
You get that Jones effect right, whereas the collaborative me
would be like you know what.
There's space for us all.
My power grows when others risewith me, right, and I've said-.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
So you're coaching them in that way I'm coaching
them.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Yeah, the best leader knows how to delegate, and when
you don't know how to delegate,you're literally expanding your
reach.
Right, you're using-.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Automate delegate or eliminate.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
Exactly right.
So the challenge, of course,would be in your office, in your
field, on your team, see who'sdoing a good job and, instead of
looking at them in envy andtrying to take them down, give
them some kudos.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
Yeah, yeah.
Celebrate them, because thetruth is is that nobody can take
your spot.
There's nobody, that's you, andso, really, you are only
competing with the version thatyou were yesterday.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
Correct, and when you do that, do this practice.
It literally opens you up toyour greatness.
Exactly Then you have anopportunity to shine.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
Yes, yes, yes, I love it.
Okay, one thing that I see overand over again there's a
pattern about ideas andcreativity.
Oh God, yes, yes and so I wouldsay that the clients that have
challenges with that they willbe like and I really resonate
with this because I definitelyrecognize that I had some of
(17:23):
this happening in my earlystages of just being an
entrepreneur is that you wouldcome up with an idea and then
all of a sudden, somebody elsehas the same idea, yeah, or
similar, because we're allsharing consciousness.
Like there's no such thing asoriginal thought and we're all
connected, you know.
But that doesn't soothe yoursoul when you're in that feeling
(17:44):
of scarcity.
So the competitive versionwould be that was my idea first
and then the collaborativeversion would be like great
minds, sync up, let's buildsomething better together.
Because the truth is, like yousaid, you can collapse time, so
might as well collaborate.
(18:04):
Okay, so then the embodimentchallenge for that would be like
invite someone to co-create apiece of content or collab on
like an Instagram reel.
Co-create a piece of content orcollab on like an Instagram
reel.
Speaker 2 (18:21):
Like somebody who's in your field, like you know.
Raise their shine and you knowyou'll win together.
Yeah, we're essentially askingyou to do the exact opposite of
crabs in a bucket, right?
Yes, let's allow all the crabsin the bucket to lift that crab
up.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (18:32):
And then once that crab's up, that crab can kind of
pull everyone out right.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
Yeah, because that's where the happiness actually
lives is, when you all wintogether and like.
You will do a lot of sufferingif you do crabs in a bucket,
like for sure.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
Well, another.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
What about money?
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Oh my God, and I was going to say.
Another field really is moneyand business.
Okay, All of our clients areout there, they're making money
and a lot of them are still kindof functioning in that
competitive mindset right wherethey need to outsell everyone,
they need to get that promotionand in corporate, that makes a
(19:12):
lot of sense.
However, you can stillincorporate a collaborative
mindset and instead ofcompetitive me would say
something like I need to outselleveryone.
This launch and collaborativeme would be something like the
collaborative me would be myaligned clients always find me
(19:34):
and there's more than enough forall of us and that's the honest
truth and it feels better tosay that and it opens up all of
the chakras in order to makethat actually happen.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
So it's amazing and it's the truth, like lack and
limitation will give you thatand expansiveness will give you
that, and it's true.
I mean, if you think about howmany billions of people there
are on this planet and you haveone launch, chances are you're
going to align with your peopleif you are not looking at
(20:07):
conquer status.
You know if you're not havingthat energy of like I have to
crush this or else everything isover.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
It has to be a waterfall instead of a trickle.
It all starts with a trickle.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
It starts with a trickle.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Well, a good challenge for this would be to
reach out to a peer and ask howyou can support their next
launch or their next endeavor Bepart of their come up.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
Yep, and you know in the beginning be a supporting
character Be an affiliate, forexample.
Be something where you aregoing to learn and you're going
to grow in your own way.
Don't be afraid to do that.
Visibility is a crazy one, sobeing seen essentially.
So I'm going to do that.
(20:50):
Competitive me.
So competitive me would havefeared judgment, rejection and I
would have hid gifts, like notwilling to share the gifts that
I have.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
You're not talking about the gifts that you got at
your store.
You're talking about the innategifts that need to come out,
yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
All of us are given gifts, you know, and we have to
choose if we want to be fullyseen with those gifts.
Correct, so collaborative me.
Where I would be collaborativewith the universe essentially is
that I could show up moreauthentically not perfectly, and
show up with a lot of honesty,like radical honesty.
(21:39):
I think that is verycollaborative because then you
will meet people where they alsohave shown up, maybe in their
own honest journey.
Right, and also like we haveenough people pretending to be
perfect and that isn't going tohelp someone expand.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Correct.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
You know, no.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
You're looking at me like no no, no, I'm right there
with you.
I feel like there is aperfection is most certainly a.
It's a disease, right?
It keeps you from actuallymoving forward is most certainly
a disease, right, it keeps youfrom actually moving forward.
And if you look at someone andyou see someone else's
perfection, the next thing youdo when you look at yourself is
(22:24):
you see all your imperfections.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
Yeah, for sure.
So the embodiment challenge forvisibility or being seen would
be to share something that youonce kept hidden, which is kind
of popular on social media Now.
People are like, oh, you know,instagram versus real life or
you know, they'll show like aphoto of them before they
photoshopped it.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
I was gonna say.
I was gonna say, do a couple ofposts with no filters.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
Yeah.
I mean if you just share sometype of truth where you have
maybe been hiding yourself frombeing seen, maybe something that
you're struggling with, you'llfind that you open the door to
other people who are also havingthat.
Or if you share something thathappened in the past that you've
overcome, it helps people seeyou as an authority on that
(23:11):
issue and it can be reallyconnection building.
So again, building thatconnection.
But I mean, are you having funplaying this game?
Speaker 2 (23:20):
I'm having a lot of fun.
I have my last one and ofcourse it is going to be about
relationships.
Everyone has relationshipissues, right?
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Whether it's a romantic relationship or a work
relationship.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
We are just full of relationships I mean I guess you
could also extend torelationships that you have with
a pet, but you know, it dependson how deep into that pet
you're getting right.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
But your life is dependent on the quality of your
relationships.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
That is correct.
That is correct.
So you know, the oldcompetitive-based mindset or me
would say something like shethinks that she is better than
me, right?
So right then, and there you'retalking about power, struggling
, you're talking about fightingto win.
Or one dominates the other.
And the new collaborative me isgoing to say something like she
(24:09):
is inspiring me to do betterthan I did before, right?
Which is creating a win-winscenario.
It's peace versus justice,right?
So now you're in a positionwhere you can share your
strengths and wins versus vyingto see who's gonna be the
quarterback.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Yeah Right, we versus me.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
We versus me.
That's the way to go.
So what I would do for theembodiment challenge is end a
fight with a peaceful phrasesuch as what can we do to find a
peaceful solution to this issue?
Speaker 1 (24:42):
Boom, I love it.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Right then.
And there you go, from winningand fighting to win to being
like okay, how can we arrive atthis at the same time?
Right, that's a win-winscenario.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
So the next segment we're going to talk about is the
feminine shift in leadership.
So there's definitely a rise ofcyclical, creative,
community-led movements,powerful women stepping forward
and leading the change.
(25:18):
And not only women, but men whohave balanced their masculine
and feminine are able to make astronger impact with connection
and it's more fulfilling right.
So those that have balanced themasculine and feminine energy
which, all again, all males andfemales have it all.
(25:39):
All humans are born with bothenergies, both sides of us,
right, and so when we find thatbalance, we can be unstoppable.
Um, but if we're just talkingabout women, I I found this
great quote in Forbes that saidfemale-led businesses are
growing twice as fast asmale-led ones.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
I can tell you why.
Speaker 1 (26:02):
Yeah, tell me.
Speaker 2 (26:03):
I can tell you why Because when you compete, you
compete to, and when you'recompeting, you're focusing on
one problem, right.
When you are collaborating,you're focusing on multiple
solutions at the same time,right.
So a female-led business thatis focused in on solutions is
going to get further alongfaster and gather more strength
(26:25):
than someone who is justfocusing on their problems.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
Because women are choosing to create a community.
There's a lot of give and take,and what I would say is that
feminine leadership isn't reallyeven about gender.
It's about intuition, inclusion, interdependence, and it can be
, you know, a male that isbalanced, and masculine and
(26:51):
feminine, using that, thatstrategy, as the way that they
lead, you know, for theirleadership abilities.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
And I mean I've, you've, you've had clients in
the past who have been female,who have been stuck in male
roles, who are having a hardtime making that switch and it
and it's.
It's simply because the, theworkforce is still focused on
that mindset.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Yeah, they're still focused on the push through and
climb the corporate ladder andyou're just constantly pushing a
boulder up a hill.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
And how wonderful that we are now coming to an age
where we can reverse that.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
Yeah, I feel like the era is collaborative.
People say, oh, the future isfeminine and we're in like the
age of aquarius.
But I just want to reiteratethat both male and female
genders, you know, are anygender essentially, in these
times, you know, everyone isnecessary.
Like, if you look at nature,there's an ecosystem and each
(27:57):
person, each, each, you knowentity, each microorganism, like
everything, plays a specificpart, and the same is true as
that, you know, in my business.
I find that if a woman isbalanced and masculine and
feminine, she's unstoppable.
And same goes for men.
And if men are just looking atwomen and thinking negative
(28:20):
about women, and if women arelooking negative at men, like
you're losing energy.
First of all, you're definitelysuffering because there's no
escaping a man and there's noescaping a woman, and so we have
to come together and unify.
And so what?
I have been in a lot ofmovement conversations, and so I
(28:43):
wanted to say that movementsreally are born in moments, and
currently a lot of the movementsthat I'm involved in are with
women, and it's when women sayenough, but they last when women
say together.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
That's so beautiful, and I'm getting the imagery of
going from a male-dominatedscenario or system to a
female-dominated, and in orderto do that, you have a full
glass of water, and that's male,and you have an empty glass of
water, and that's female.
And in order to go from one tothe next, you actually have to
(29:22):
take that energy from the maleand dip it in right.
So there is going to be atransference of energy from the
male to the female, right.
So it's not that females are onthe rise.
It is what we're trying to dois balance it out.
And in order to balance it out,we have to re-engage and
re-engage the feminine and allowthe feminine to heal the
(29:45):
masculine, and then we have thatpowerful balance.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
Right, and I think, especially in this era, in the
US specifically, we have so muchpolarity, much polarity.
So much division, that men andwomen are also being pit against
each other, and not just race,but gender and skin color and
(30:15):
all the things are being pitagainst each other when really
our true power comes fromunification.
Our true power comes fromcollaboration.
True power comes fromunification.
True power comes fromcollaboration.
But feminine leadershipredefines power not as control
but as co-creation.
Because, women, we are creators.
Obviously we give life, but weare naturally creative beings.
We came here to create, andbeing creative means figuring
(30:38):
out how to be collaborative.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
And the benefit of being a co-creator is that that
gives you so much change, right.
It gives you so much movement.
It allows you to move forwardwithout having to drag the old
weights of behind, which are allyour masculine win, win, win,
competitive, competitive,competitive.
Because that's done, we don'tneed that anymore, right, right,
(31:03):
so let us allow that to be gone.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
Yes, I'm on board for that.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
The truth is, the compete, dominate, outsell
paradigm is coming to an end.
Speaker 1 (31:17):
It's outdated.
Speaker 2 (31:18):
It's super outdated.
Speaker 1 (31:19):
And the new model is collaborate, expand, amplify,
because, as conscious coachesand leaders, we want to amplify
others.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
And you and I are particularly in a field where
there really shouldn't be anycompetition.
We are all trying to do thesame thing.
There shouldn't be anycompetition.
No Right, we are all trying todo the same thing uplift
humanity.
So there shouldn't becompetition between coaches.
But we also see that in otherindustries.
Speaker 1 (31:47):
All industries, it's just.
It's part of human nature too,because there's you know, part
of our brain that you know istrying to survive and we are in.
Obviously we've outgrown thesaber-toothed tiger.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
So like we can thrive together.
I like what you say in regardsto the collaborate, expand and
amplify.
I mean, power doesn't decreasewhen it's shared, it multiplies
Right.
So if you are participating insomething that's positive, it
doesn't matter if you are theperson who's going to catch the
winning touchdown or any of that, as long as you are part of the
process, you're beautiful,you're in the go.
Speaker 1 (32:29):
Right, you still get the Super Bowl ring.
Speaker 2 (32:30):
Exactly, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
Scarcity says protect your throne.
Collaboration says build alonger table.
Speaker 2 (32:38):
Build a longer table, and that is what you've been
doing your whole career.
You're just building this hugetable.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
And when I was interviewed recently, they asked
me a question about like, ohwell, what if somebody comes to
the issue in this way?
It's like I don't care If theywant to come to table for any
reason any way, we will sit withthem and we to table with for
any reason any, any way.
Like we will sit with them andwe will talk with them, because
the truth is, if somebody getsinspired, I don't care why they
(33:06):
came, I don't care why they cameto send in my business, like
we're here for a movement, we'rehere for a mission and
everyone's welcome, yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
As long as the job's done.
And one thing I'll say aboutyou is that you know,
collaboration is, it's in yourbiology and it's your blueprint
and it's everyone's blueprint.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
It's everyone's.
Speaker 2 (33:25):
Yeah, it's my blueprint, it's your blueprint.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
Like just with us, empowered Posse, just breathe.
That in Collaboration is inyour biology and your blueprint.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
Like you have the ability to collaborate.
You don't have to compete.
Speaker 1 (33:41):
Right, and we are all tribal beings.
We all worked in tribes.
If we're going to really lookat our brain, we thrive when we
are in community and when we arein proximity to people who are
on the same mission, right?
All right are on the samemission right, all right.
So next segment I want to getinto is five ways to lead from
(34:03):
collaboration, not competition.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
That's it.
That's all you need.
That's it.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
Okay.
So, number one, you're going tocelebrate others publicly.
So instead of comparison orwhatever judgment, or they're
further ahead than me, orwhatever the energy is right
Like instead of comparison,offer amplification.
Speaker 2 (34:28):
I love that.
Instead of hate, give hugs.
So number two join or createsacred circles or masterminds.
Why is this?
Because proximity breedselevation.
Right, we want to elevate, wewant to.
That connective process liftseveryone up.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
And I would just say, to mirror that is that you
don't want to be the smartestperson in the room.
You want the people in yourproximity to really challenge
you, to make you expand, and soI love that.
Create those sacred circles yo.
Speaker 2 (35:05):
What's number three?
Speaker 1 (35:06):
Number three is deprogram the scarcity voice.
Okay, so here's the scarcityvoice.
I'm going to tell you what itsounds like.
It sounds like if I help her,I'll lose my edge.
And what I want you tochallenge that voice with is, if
I rise with her, we all risefaster.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
And that's the truth.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
It's the truth.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
That is the truth.
That's all you got to say.
Number four co-create offers orevents, right.
So we want you to lean intopartnerships, right?
We want you to be excited aboutshared energy, and shared
energy is expanded reach right.
So collaborate, collaborate,collaborate and you'll see your
brand just grow and grow andgrow.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
And number five, choose coaches who model
collaboration.
If their success is built ondominance.
Ask yourself is that my path?
Because whatever you learn, youwill embody, especially with a
coach.
Yeah, you will repeat, you willmirror that.
And so really ask yourself isthat your path?
(36:10):
Do you want to be part of anold paradigm that no longer
serves you?
The fulfillment of being onthis planet at this time.
Speaker 2 (36:19):
I wouldn't want to.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
No.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
Let me answer for you .
No, the answer is no.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
The answer is no.
The truth is true.
Success isn't built in silos.
It's co-authored by souls inalignment.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
Souls in alignment, and that is literally the
definition of collaboration.
Right, it's being in alignmentwith another soul.
Speaker 1 (36:42):
Right.
Speaker 2 (36:43):
So a quick recap right, competition divides and
collaboration expands.
Let me tell you, you alwayswant to expand, you always want
to expand.
Speaker 1 (36:51):
You're growing or dying.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Exactly so.
Choose collaboration as yournervous system strategy, wealth
building model and leadershipphilosophy yes, collaborate your
way, all the way to the top.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
It is how I've built all my businesses and how I've
built coalitions that havesucceeded.
Speaker 2 (37:09):
I'll go so far as to say that if your business is
struggling, it's probablybecause you are competing with
someone that you shouldn't be.
You should be working with them.
Speaker 1 (37:20):
You're sometimes probably competing with yourself
because it's you versus you.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
Yes, that is correct.
Speaker 1 (37:25):
So here's a journal prompt because you might need to
dig a little and figure outwhat's actually going on,
because you might be like, oh no, none of this is me.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
And if you're not journaling journal Journaling is
receipt that you are makingprogress.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
Yes, so here's a journal prompt.
Where am I still operating fromcompetition or fear of not
being enough?
Speaker 2 (37:50):
I got one.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
Oh, you got one.
Speaker 2 (37:52):
I got one who in my life or network could I uplift
or co-create with today?
Speaker 1 (38:01):
I like that.
Should I do one more?
Yes, why not Okay?
Speaker 2 (38:06):
Power of three.
Speaker 1 (38:07):
What would it feel like to embody success that's
sourced from synergy, notstriving?
Speaker 2 (38:15):
Sourced from synergy.
Speaker 1 (38:18):
Yes, baby.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
You are a songwriter, aren't you?
Speaker 1 (38:20):
Align it, align it honey, you got to say it so
people remember it.
Sourced from synergy.
Not striving, let's go yo.
Okay, well, we hope you enjoyedthis episode.
We are sending you the highestvibrations.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
You are held.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
You are loved.
I mean, I could try, butcollaborating with you is the
funnest part of my week andobviously my best collaboration
with you.
(38:57):
Obviously, my bestcollaboration with you is our
child, that is correct.
So without you I wouldn't havecollaboration that I feel is
worth more than anything in theworld.
Speaker 2 (39:13):
That was well done.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
You're welcome.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
Good job.
Speaker 1 (39:16):
Okay, now do me I just did you Again.
Speaker 2 (39:20):
Here's the reason why I like to collaborate with Zuri
Star Because she has magic inher bloodstream.
Speaker 1 (39:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (39:29):
And I like magic.
Speaker 1 (39:31):
I love magic.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
I love magic Okay we're good.
And then it's my turn Go ahead.
Speaker 1 (39:36):
Here's why I like to collaborate with Michael Starr
yeah, yeah, yeah, Because hemakes me laugh and he's a real
motherfucker.
Speaker 2 (39:50):
That's that.
That's that.
Get your finger off the button.
Get your finger off the button.
That's that mirror.
Speaker 1 (39:58):
Good day, sir we're good, we're good, we're good.
You can Silencio.
Speaker 2 (40:08):
Do not hang up on me how dare you.
Speaker 1 (40:12):
Okay, this is a two-hour podcast, okay.
Okay.
Let's compete and see who doesbetter.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
Let's collaborate.
The end the show will end inthree, two no-transcript.
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On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!