April 18, 2024 • 37 mins
Have you ever considered that the messiest parts of life could be the most fertile ground for growth? That's exactly what we dive into on the Empowerment Couple podcast with your hosts, Zuri and Mikey Starr. This week, we're unfurling the concept of compost as more than just decomposed organic matter, but as a powerful metaphor for personal transformation. We share how we turned our own financial setbacks into rich soil for new beginnings and invite you to reflect on how your challenges can serve as pivotal nutrients for your life's greatest blooms.
Embrace your history with pride, even the parts that smell a bit ripe. Our conversation this week ventures into the art of 'celebrating your shit' and learning from the financial missteps that catch us off guard. We recount our journey through the muck and how it led to not just survival, but thriving in both life and business. Beyond our own stories, we pay homage to the age-old wisdom of our elders and their guidance in nurturing growth from life's compost-rich experiences. Their teachings remind us that even in adversity, there's a seed of opportunity waiting to sprout.
Relationships, much like gardens, can weather storms and droughts if tended to with care and dedication. In this episode, we discuss how to fortify your partnership, viewing every setback as an opportunity to enhance the connection rather than a weed to be pulled. We stress the significance of mutual responsibility and growth, whether you're flying solo or navigating the journey with a partner. Our banter will not only entertain but also inspire you to cultivate a more empowered and intertwined existence by tilling the soil of life's challenges and planting seeds for a flourishing future.
Looking for Empowerment Coaching? Apply to work with Zuri here
Looking for Expansion Coaching? Apply to work with Mike here.
Download the FREE Heart-To-Heart Exercise to deepen your connection here.
Manifest everything you want in your life, using our HoldTheVibe.com course! 5 modules led with audio and video by Mikey and Zuri to help you unlock the magic of manifesting using a simple step-by-step process.
Want to be on our show? Use this form.
Support your health and get in on our affiliate offers:
- Join our Frequency Family and buy your own Healy Device here.
- Get 10% off any Intellipure device using this link & code: Zuri
- Want to do what we are doing? Join us on Kajabi and create a course, email list, coaching program, or membership. You’ll get two free weeks and help us continue our ad-free podcast.
- Want to podcast? Use Buzzsprout the best podcasting host! Following ...
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Okay, okay, let me get my scroll real quick.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
I'll try not to be long winded.
Hear ye, hear ye, On the 15thof April 2000.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
It's like when somebody says like oh well, tell
me about yourself.
Well, I was born.
I was born in a barn, just likeJesus.
And when I was born in thatbarn, like no, I don't mean like
, tell me your life story.
I mean like what, what?
What makes you tick?
Welcome to the EmpowermentCouple podcast, where your path
(00:34):
to self-mastery expands.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
My co-host is Empowerment Coach Zuri Starr.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
And he's Expansion Coach Mikey Starr.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Together, we are the.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Empowerment Couple.
Our mission is simple to serveyou, love, so you can make
informed decisions to regain andmaintain your personal power.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
We'll take you on a journey to a life filled with
purpose, passion and limitlesspossibilities, while sharing
stories of transformation,wellness hacks and healthy
habits backed by science andancient wisdom.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Plus, we'll keep you entertained with engaging games,
banter and funny innuendosalong the way.
Each episode is an excitingblend of education,
entertainment and empowermentdesigned to help you create a
mindset to be a magnet for morelove, happiness and abundance.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Together with our special guests.
We are dedicated to sharinginformation that empowers you to
co-create your most beautifullife.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
So if you're ready to embrace the power within, hit
that subscribe button and let'sembark on this empowering
journey together.
Yes, yes, for sure.
I mean, if you are an artist,you understand why you go
through the pain that you gothrough.
Whatever you go through, you'relike, oh, I'm going to turn
that into a song.
Or oh, I'm going to turn thatinto a piece of art, oh, I'm
(01:49):
going to turn that into astand-up bit, Like.
If you're an artist of any form, you know that that's important
and that's where compost comesin in this time of year.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
Love compost.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
All winter long we have been putting our scraps
into a bin and turning it, andevery single piece of scrap that
we have goes into this compost,right.
And so this time of year we'relike we have all of this great
compost.
Let's turn this compost, alsoknown as shit, okay, and let's
(02:28):
bloom some flowers.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Now, mind you, there's multiple types of
compost.
Right, there's the physicalcompost.
Right, you go outside and wehave a compost turner and all
that stuff.
But compost could also be extraweight.
Compost can also be you know, acouple bounce checks in your
history.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
And who writes checks anymore.
But yes, I know what you'retalking about, but compost can
be anything.
That is negative shit, you know.
So today's analogy is all aboutcompost being something that
has happened in your life,because none of us are
experiencing life without acontrast.
(03:12):
So compost analogy is yourcontrast, like your contrast is
something that is causing you toexpand and become more, and in
this analogy we've talked aboutit a lot about gardening and
planting seeds and really likeanything that you are looking to
grow, and right now, all of usare trying to grow ourselves or
(03:37):
aiming to grow ourselves.
We're all aiming to expand, andMike is an expansion coach and
he can tell you that the onlyway to expand is to use the
compost that comes into yourlife so that you can bloom
flowers.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Correct.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Correct so that you can grow a business, so that
your seeds have enoughnourishment.
And I would say, as anempowerment coach and a lot
working with entrepreneurs andprofessionals and performance
professionals, is that yourcompost, all those things that
(04:19):
happened in your life that wereseen as a negative or that were
painful or that made you feel acertain way.
Those are the things that, ifyou expose them and transmute
them, those are the things thatare going to have people latch
onto you and want to work withyou, because they're like if she
could get through that, then Ican get through that, and if she
(04:43):
can turn this into whateverbusiness, multimillion dollar
business, because she used thecompost rather than just getting
buried with it Cause all of uscan get buried with it Like,
sometimes it's overwhelming,Sometimes it feels like an
avalanche of shit landing on you.
And we've been there, Mike andI have been there, and recently
(05:07):
we had this experience and itinspired us to do this episode
with you about compost.
Because recently I had anexperience where I was looking
to do something financially andI wasn't paying attention to
stuff that was happening with myfinances and I got mega burned
and didn't get what I wanted outof the equation because I got
(05:33):
complacent.
I'm going to call myself out onit and if you listen to our
other episode about complacencyand your comfort zone, you know
like you have to lift the needleand in this case there was so
much compost on me that I waslike man, this is a lot of shit
that I'm going to have to fix.
I'm going to have to be oncustomer service calls.
(05:55):
I'm going to have to be on, youknow, disputing things.
I'm going to have to deal withthis fraud, stuff Like wow, this
is a lot of shit that Iattracted onto my beautiful farm
and I'm going to have torebuild.
I'm going to have to use it andfigure out why not why but I'm
(06:18):
going to have to figure out whatto do with it.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
And to that I say congratulations.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
If, if anyone, if you're, if you're sitting on,
you know you know some some badfinancial decisions.
If you're sitting on, you knowsome health related issues.
If you're sitting on, you knowif you can look back at your
life and be like, oh, thisdidn't happen and this didn't
happen, this didn't happen andjust you know just a nice
laundry list of things that arenegative.
(06:46):
Congratulations it means thatyou have an extremely fertile
garden Fertile.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
You have enough leverage.
You have enough shit, you haveenough leverage to make a
significant move.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
You just have to use it, you have to transmute it.
Take that seed analogy like youwere talking about.
You take a seed and you plantit in soil that has no
fertilization.
You're not really going to geta whole lot of of blossoms,
right?
You know that that seed isn'tit.
It doesn't have all thenutrients that it needs to grow
into its full potential.
Those seeds are your ideas.
(07:21):
Those seeds are your, yourversions of yourself, your
finances, your relationshipsthat you want to see for
yourself.
Well, if you don't have that,but you have a bunch of shit,
right?
It means, oh, I am poised toget what I want.
All I have to do is celebratemy shit.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Yeah, you got to celebrate your shit.
And I think that, from mywealthiest friends to my friends
who are just starting out, ormy daughter's friends who are
still teenagers whateverStarting out or restarting yeah,
starting out or restarting Shitis kind of just experience that
we experience in our life thatmake us expand.
(08:04):
This is why our elders, not somuch in this country but a lot
in other countries, are sowell-respected, because they
have experience, and experiencemeans that they went through
some shit.
They went through some reallyhard times that helped them
become more and that help themjust survive.
(08:27):
Honestly, like there are peoplewho are alive right now,
especially like the centurionslike that have been through
multiple rounds of war, multiple, you know.
They've been throughdepressions, they, they have
been through some shit.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Housing crises yes.
Wars yes, yes.
Famine Pandemics yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
The list is very, very long, and I think that we
are not recognizing how valuablethe voices are for our elders,
because they really know how toget through some shit and use
that shit in order to blossom,to bloom, to be fruitful, and
(09:12):
all of us have that opportunity.
It really just comes down tochoosing it.
Yeah, so we had this experiencewith a Like I was saying we've
had this experience recently.
With a like.
I was saying, like we've hadthis experience recently.
But in talking with people,young and old, most people have
had an experience in even thevery, very wealthy, like I said,
(09:33):
or the very, very just startingout, and the elders, like
people, have had an experiencewhere somebody has scammed them,
right, like, we've all had that, and it doesn't make you unique
, but it certainly does not makeit that there's something wrong
(09:57):
with you.
Correct, and I think that thatis the message that is most
important to hear when you'regoing through this is that it's
not time to lose self-respect.
It's not time to lose your selfto this shit.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
It's not happening to you.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
It is happening for you.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
For you.
Speaker 2 (10:20):
And that's hard.
There are things that, forexample, like the grief process,
when you're like this ishappening for me, like what you
(10:47):
know and losing our belovedpuggle, you know like death,
death, death, death, death,right, and I think when I look
at those situations I understandlike, okay, that was actually
happening for me because Ineeded to change my business
structure.
But I can say that now it tooktime to get here and we know
(11:13):
when somebody's older nobodylives forever we know, like
Aries, you're going to die.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
You're going to die, libra, you're going to die.
But before you die.
Speaker 2 (11:23):
But before you die, and honestly, when somebody you
love that has lived a long,beautiful life goes, you often
will get kind of like downloadsor experiences, or they will
inspire the next version of youand it's, I feel like,
(11:43):
spiritually speaking, it's a wayof them gifting to you some
wisdom that you didn't maybehave access to when they were
even alive.
It's like, okay, homeboy, timefor you to carry the torch, you
know.
Or like, hey Zuri, time for youto step up and you know, like,
live this way.
It can inspire you and it cannot just be, you know, horribly
(12:10):
awful.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
What happens right after?
In my opinion, if you do itcorrectly, what happens right
after you get dumped a bunch ofshit is the possibility of
sprouting something new insideof you.
Yeah, you know, for me I'm kindof going back to my shoulder
injury, because it was profound.
You know, having your strongarm suddenly your weak arm,
(12:35):
you're like what the heck?
You know and I'm a balancedperson yoga meditation.
So when half of my body was notworking, you know, there was a
part of me that was like youknow, why is this happening to
me?
Why is this?
Why is this?
But I used it right.
I used it to turn the dial andnow my body is healthier than it
(12:55):
had been in the last 20 years.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
And in proximity to you.
I used it to deepen some of myhealing ability and I called in
different healing devices, and Icalled in different healing
devices and I called indifferent like healers, and my
own ability expanded for healing.
You know, like there was lots ofReiki, there was lots of like
intuitive downloads, and it'slike, okay, we need to do this.
(13:17):
And like, okay, we need to dothis, and like just pivoting to
be of purpose to your struggle,you know, and like that's that's
where, if you allow yourpartner to be, you know your,
your, your VIP when you are down.
You know, like you allow themto be the star player while you
(13:40):
were, like on the bench.
If you allow that to happen,just see, like, how much you
expand by taking.
You know, kind of like you hadto rest, like you had to, you
had to take a a more feminineapproach to healing, which is
really hard as a male, and, likeyour, your ability to do that,
(14:02):
though, made you more balanced,correct, and that's where it is
interesting.
Like life just gives you that,like, oh, we gave you this shit
because you actually needed toexpand this part of yourself.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
And then once, once I got past that, then I'm looking
back at my life and I'm likewait a minute.
I had I've had the power to dothat the whole time.
I didn't have to wait until Igot sick to get healthy.
I could have just beenhealthier and even healthier.
So when you get past one ofthose scenarios right where you
heal yourself or you sprout in abed of shit or fertilizer, it
(14:40):
gives you inspiration to lookacross your life and be like
okay, so I was able to fix this,I'm going to fix this, this and
this.
I'm going to level myself upbecause Level up?
Because I'm either movingforward or I'm moving backwards.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
There's no such thing as pause.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Okay, so I have a funny game to play with you.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Okay, so we're going to use the shit and the flower
analogy.
Okay, and I want you todescribe short, short
description.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
Short description.
I'll do my best.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Yeah, I want you to describe three times where you
took shit and you turn it intoflowers.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
My in and out with corporate was shit.
Right, my experience withcorporate America was shit, and
from that experience I blossomedinto our current level of
living, where I had theopportunity to raise our
daughter and-.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Create your own schedule.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
Create my own schedule, not trying to time for
money and rebirth myself basedon my skill sets, not on um
skill sets that I needed inorder to do a mundane job.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Ooh, I love that.
That's good, Okay.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Number two number two I'm going to say health,
because health was definitely aum, uh, a major, uh, major
player in my everyday activitiesand being able to go from a
place of pain and discomfort toa place of power and flexibility
Super nice.
And then just my third, ofcourse, would be, you know, the
(16:26):
good old-fashioned daddy issuethat I have Issues, issues
Plural, my plural daddy issues.
But you know, my number onedaddy issue, of course, was, you
know, the abandonment and nothaving him around my life To
rebrand who I am, because I'mnot living any type of pattern
(16:49):
laid out from him, because therewas no pattern there, right,
the only pattern that was therewas abandonment.
So I was able to take that andbe part of Zarell's life every
single day.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Our daughter's life.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Every single day.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (17:06):
I went from having, yeah, Our daughter's life Every
single day, Like you know.
I went from from having, yeah,it's, it's, it's, it's that,
it's, it's that you know thoseshitty things.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
You turned into flowers flowers.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
What about you?
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Um, I could do this.
I could tell you the threethings, or I can tell you three
more things to build you up andto fill up your cup, because
there's three other things thatI actually thought you were
going to say, and I think thatwould be a funnier part of the
game.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Oh, so you have your own list of my fuck ups.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Well, I, I'm kidding.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
Yeah, I thought you were going to say this, michael.
Remember when you did this andyou fell on your ass?
Why didn't you say this one?
Let me see my list.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
No, that's not what I was saying.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
You're talking about keep it light, but you pulled
out your own scroll.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
I didn't say keep it light, I said keep it short.
I mean, we don't go light, wego like you know here's my
heaviness Like let's go deep.
Let's go deep and really dig inthis shit and really make
flowers.
This podcast alone right now,what we are doing, talking this
way where we are honest andradically willing to put it all
(18:18):
out there.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
And serve love.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
And serve love.
Like that is us digging in theshit to make the flowers, and we
hope that it.
You know, our hope, ourconcentrated effort of doing
these shows, is that you takethe shit that we are exposing
and maybe you look at some ofyour shit and then maybe you're
(18:40):
like, hey, I could turn thatinto flowers.
Like you know, it's starting tosound like a Miley Cyrus song,
yeah, but here's three things.
Here's three things.
Okay, here's three things thatI thought you were going to say
so, and no, it's not, because Ihave a long list of all the
things that you've, you know,had done or like no.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
But you do have a list.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
Well, of course, I'm a wife.
We have lists.
Okay, don't get it twisted.
So what I was going to say isthat you, I was going to say
that you took the issues thatyou had, for example, with
alcohol and you turned it into ayoga practice Correct.
(19:25):
And you turned the issues thatyou had with like focus into a
meditation practice Correct.
And you turned the issues thatyou had with your situation of
feeling like you were stuck insome generational bullshit, some
, some cycles, and you decidedyou're going to be a cycle
(19:47):
breaker and, in your healingprocess, help other people heal
Correct.
So those would be three waysthat I would say you took shit
that was given to you, that youinherited, that you encountered,
that you experienced becauseyou needed some compost to
create those flowers Correct.
So that's what I would say.
(20:08):
I can do my own too, but I justwanted to reflect that that I
see you and I appreciate howmuch you have expanded and how
much you have turned a wholebunch of shit into some
beautiful flowers which, by theway, btw, mike gives me flowers
almost every week which, by theway, btw, mike gives me flowers
almost every week and when I domy coaching calls or I'm in
(20:29):
sessions with clients for thevarious businesses, I always
have flowers next to me oncamera.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
What does Tony say?
If you do the things in thebeginning of the relationship,
at the end of the relationship,there's not an end to the
relationship.
Yes, you're my biggest asset,honey.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
You're mine.
So I'm going to, I'm going tocontinue planting beautiful
seeds in your big pile of shit.
I was like, oh, where is thisgoing?
He said planting seeds and Iwas just like what I'm like?
Am I ovulating?
Speaker 1 (21:09):
Some of the times where he's like I'm a shit bag.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
Oh, oh, let me grab my seeds real quick.
Wait a minute, I am not shit, Iam not, I am not the pile of
shit.
Speaker 1 (21:18):
How did this go there ?
Well, we know I'm talking aboutwhen you get woe is me.
When I get woe is me.
When I get woe is me, the veryfirst thing that you do, I feel
like your finger is just likepushing seeds into my soul, like
, oh, oh, oh, you feel bad aboutyourself.
Boom, boom, boom, boom, andthen as a what are the seeds?
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Well, give me an example.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
That doesn't sound very good the seeds are like you
can make a lot of money doingthis, or you can be very happy
doing this, or, you know, if youstopped beating yourself up on
a regular basis, you're going toexperience this.
And at the time as you'reshoving your finger in my
self-loathing, I'm like no, getyour fingers out of there.
(22:02):
But, within a couple of hours,you're like oh, what is this?
It's like is this movement Likewhoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa?
I didn't know, I could be alittle bit happier today.
Like, oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
So you're saying you need a safe word?
Speaker 1 (22:15):
A safe word.
There's no such thing as safewords.
Speaker 2 (22:17):
You said you're sticking your fingers here and
you're sticking them like whatwould be your safe word Zeo Maxi
Wombdweebee.
Oh, I can't say that, Come on.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Super Califragilistic Expealadocious.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
Supercalifragilistic Expealadocious.
Oh yeah, Okay, that's our safeword, oh yeah, okay, supersonic.
Supersonic.
Yeah, let's just have it bethat.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
So sometimes when you're, when you're digging in
my shit, you're, you're not,you're not, you're not digging
in it, you're just planting.
Speaker 2 (23:00):
Yeah, and I would say that you and I have had what
we're doing right now the banter.
We haven't stopped giving eachother shit in terms of like
messing with each other in abanter way since we met.
So, going back to do the thingsthat you know worked in your
relationship in the beginning.
Don't stop doing them, becauseyou'll never have an end if you
(23:21):
continue to carry those out, andmost of us do get complacent
and most of us don't use thethings that happen to our
relationship as compost.
I know plenty of relationshipsthat have had the worst things
that can happen in arelationship where there was
infidelity or fraud or divorceand they have figured out how to
actually use those things andturn them into something Correct
(23:44):
, and so the choice is yours.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
By the way, as you're dealing with your own shit your
own fertilizer be very carefulnot to take your fertilizer and
put it to someone else's gardenbed.
Right, Keep your own shit, it'svaluable.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
Right, don't try to offset, don't try to blame your
shit on someone else, yep,because it's literally removing
your potency yep right.
So if you have shitty things inyour past, own them.
Those are yours, protect them,transmute that.
Don't try to take your shit andput it in someone else and be
like oh you know, you're thereason for this and you're the
(24:23):
reason for this.
That doesn't work.
It doesn't transmute.
The same way it may empoweryour partner to transmute twice
as much as you and then you'releft behind.
So your shit is your fertilizer.
It's going to allow you to growat a level that is right for
(24:46):
you at the time.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
Yeah, and you know your, your partner, is going to
be a reflection of you, unlessyou drift apart and then you
separate.
Because oftentimes what I'mexperiencing in working with
like couples and you knowclients who end up inadvertently
(25:09):
telling me all about theirrelationships is that you have
the ability to grow together orgrow apart.
And when you start blaming theother person for anything
negative that's happened in yourlife that's the example of what
Mike is saying Like in realtalk terms when you blame your
(25:31):
partner for why you are notbeing successful in any area of
your life or you blame therelationship, you are literally
taking whatever shit that hasbeen gifted to you and you're
putting it.
You're not using it.
It's literally going to die,Like when compost gets exposed
to the elements it dies, themicrobes go away and they no
(25:54):
longer can fertilize the soil,and so you are essentially
saying, oh, I'm not successfulbecause I am.
You know, it's his fault,because he blah, blah, blah.
And it's like you don'tunderstand that person is there
as an agitator to help you breakyour seed and help you grow.
And oftentimes the reallytumultuous relationships that
(26:16):
have like intense amount ofpassion, where they fight hard
and they love hard, those peoplehave like metamorphic growth,
Correct, Because there's so muchagitation and heat and you will
look at where most of yourproduce comes from.
It's going to come if you livein the US.
(26:38):
It's going to come from thestates that have a lot of heat
and fertile soil and a lot offriction, and fertile soil and a
lot of friction and, obviously,farmers that know how to tend
to the soil and the water andthe air, and that produce is
(27:10):
only going to be able to begrown because they used inputs
into the soil and they used thethings that were waste
essentially and turned it intogrowth.
I turn it into flowers anddelicious fruits and let me tell
you, I, I are, we are we toodeep in this analogy.
No, no, no, no I, I do.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
I do feel sorry for those individuals who are born
on the planet with everythingright.
They didn't have to work foranything.
Everything was given to them,you know.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
It's like Michael Beckwith always says like you do
not want an easy life.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
You don't want an easy life because there's no
growth.
Yeah, right, you know the daysin.
If you look back, you'd be like, oh, you know, I spent a bunch
of money and I went on a bunchof trips and did this and did
this, but what did I actually do?
Right?
How did I move?
How did I transform myself?
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Did you leave an impact?
Did you make an impact?
Did you leave a legacy?
You know.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
That's why I'm always saying celebrate your shit Like
if you come from you know somehardships.
That is your fertilizer.
That is your fertilizer.
That means you have more matterto create with than someone who
does not have as hard of a life.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
And here's the thing is that you have to also shift
the focus, because if you'rejust focusing on your shit like
let's take, like you know, um,me too, let's take a, me too, me
too If you are just focusing onthe bad things that happened to
you and you're just looking toexpose something that that's bad
(28:39):
, that happened to you, youaren't taking the opportunity.
You're smirking at me.
What You're like, oh, she'stalking about me too.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
She's doing, me too.
She tap dances through this onelike oh, she's getting canceled
.
I was like a black light.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
The ticket set back here okay, well, I can take
something else.
But like, if you look atsomething where there are a
bunch of victims, valid victims,people who went through
something and you know arelooking to expose it and bring
light to it, that's a beautifulthing, right.
But if you are focusing on itas a way to get retribution and
(29:21):
you know revenge or name anyword, that is the same as
revenge, you know, know, oryou're looking to get attention
serving the ego or whatever'shappening around that.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
The payback.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
Right the payback, like, if you're looking for that
, you are going to put yourselfin victim mode and not use that
compost Correct.
And while I'm all for exposing,I am also all for using that
compost, the shit that you wentthrough through and turning it
into something.
And you notice like people dothat all the time.
That's why there's beautifulfoundations started for what you
(29:54):
know, women's centers, andthere's so many things that are
beautiful that came out of thatmovement.
And I just want to give thatexample because there's a lot of
contention there and I'm alwaysgoing to be on the side of
people who want to exposesomething, bring light to it, to
change a system, to radically,you know, enhance a the
(30:15):
awareness, and then then what?
And then the then what?
Is you better turn it intosomething where you retain your
power and you regain your uhability to use that shit to
create something Correct,because if you just stay focused
on this shit, you're going tosuffer, and suffering is what
(30:37):
Still for suckers Always.
Suffering is for suckers, and sowe don't want that Empowerment
couple like the empowerment isbig.
The couple is just who we are.
We're a couple.
In case you're new to us, mikeand I are a couple, but our job
(30:59):
is to serve you, empowerment andlove as much as possible.
So it would do you no good tostay in victim mode in whatever
movement, in any movement.
And I'm a white woman, mike's ablack man.
He mentioned black lives matter.
I'm like I'm not going to speakto that.
You could speak to that and youcan educate on that, because
(31:20):
like that could be another placethat I get canceled.
And here's what I'm looking todo.
I'm looking to continue toexpand our voices in unity and
in love and unity consciousness.
And we often don't talk aboutpolitical issues because it is
meant to divide you.
It is meant for you to feel andstand on one side or the other,
(31:42):
and that also does not serveyou.
Anything that you want to getdone gets done in union and
harmony.
If we go back to the gardenanalogy, you can't grow crops
without harmony and union.
You have to have union with thesoil.
You have to have union with theweather, which means you need
(32:04):
sunshine, you're going to needsome rain or you're going to
have to irrigate.
I'm three generations offarmers.
I'm a farmer's daughter, so Ican go really deep with this
analogy.
You have to have soil inputs,there has to be worms in your
soil, y'all You've got to havepollinators.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
And you've got to have the right seeds.
Speaker 2 (32:24):
And you have to have the right seeds, and your seeds
can't be contaminated or old.
There's so much that goes intoit and so much union and so much
biodiversity.
You have to have that.
And if you, if you want to belike I hate men because of this
(32:45):
movement or I hate cops becauseof this movement, or anything
politically driven that is meantto make you choose one side or
the other, that is meant to makeyou choose one side or the
other, you are going to miss outon the beauty of this
experience, which is everyoneserves a purpose.
You serve a purpose, I serve apurpose.
Empowered Posse, you serve apurpose.
You are part of this biodiverseeconomy and economic system.
(33:06):
And just plan it.
And if you take one thing away,just look to nature to
understand what happens.
If you take away the coyotes,the population of rabbits
explodes, or skunks or whatever.
Pick the thing.
It's always If you take awaysomething, you're going to have
(33:28):
an imbalance.
So we need everyone, we needall ideas, we need everyone's
thoughts.
We don't need to be cancelingeach other.
We need to be like oh, you'rehaving a human experience, let's
give them some exposure therapyto like something else, rather
than being like you're canceledby go live in your hole, you
know like.
No, let's use the shit that wedo and the things that we don't
(33:52):
understand and and help eachother and live in union and
figure out how to come togetherand create the co-create, the
reality of happiness.
Speaker 1 (34:04):
Yeah, right, so seeds of happiness.
So see the happiness.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
Yeah, and you can't, you cannot do it alone.
No, there's nothing that isborn and grown without harmony.
Speaker 1 (34:17):
The only thing in life that you could do alone is
die.
Speaker 2 (34:21):
That's it and that's what you, you likely, you know
at the end, it's just you.
Yeah, you might have peoplearound you, you know around you.
If you were lucky enough togrow into old age, you might
have people that are around you,but at the end, it's you and
only you, and you have to feelgood about all the shit that you
(34:41):
went through and what youturned it into.
Speaker 1 (34:43):
Covet your shit.
Covet your shit, seriously,covet your shit.
Your shit is gold, your shit isgold.
And if you don't have enoughshit, create some shit.
Speaker 2 (34:56):
And if your shit is bananas B-A-N-A-N-A-S, then hey,
you are in the right tribe withthe Empowerment Couple.
We are so grateful for you,Empowered Posse, and because we
love you so much, let's read areview.
Let's do this.
This one is coming from EarlCartwright, 558.
(35:20):
He says, yes, five stars Lovethe distraction playlist Perfect
, thank you.
Stars love the distractionplaylist, perfect, thank you.
And, by the way, what Earl istalking about is that we have
playlists that we share on ourpodcast.
On occasion they will be linkedin the show notes.
(35:42):
So, on that note, that's allfor us today, sending you the
highest vibrations.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
You are held.
Speaker 2 (35:55):
You are loved.
Thanks for being an importantmember of our Empowered.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
Posse Want next level access to the empowerment
couple.
Explore our private groupcoaching services to get
hands-on life-changingexperiences and sign up for one
of our empowering coursesdesigned to fast track your
success using the link in theshow notes.
Speaker 2 (36:10):
We intentionally keep this show ad free so you can
have a fully immersiveexperience with us.
Every episode is sponsored byone of our products or trusted
affiliates.
As long as you keep supportingthe show, we can keep showing up
every week to serve you, love.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
If you're inspired to serve love in return, leave us
a review and click the sharebutton to grow our empowered
posse.
Speaker 2 (36:32):
We love you.
Speaker 1 (36:35):
And just a reminder reviews are like spiritual coins
, spiritual currency.
So as you give us reviews, youare enlightening us and you're
You're filling up ourmetaphorical piggy bank.
Speaker 2 (36:49):
Correct us, and you are.
You're filling up ourmetaphorical piggy bank correct
so that we can use that and giveit back to you, and it's
creating a beautiful cycle ofgiving.
Speaker 1 (36:57):
So thank you thank you for the deposit thank you
for the deposit.
Speaker 2 (37:03):
Thank you, we love you.
Okay, okay, let me get my scroll real quick.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
I'll try not to be long winded.
Hear ye, hear ye, On the 15thof April 2000.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
It's like when somebody says like oh well, tell
me about yourself.
Well, I was born.
I was born in a barn, just likeJesus.
And when I was born in thatbarn, like no, I don't mean like
, tell me your life story.
I mean like what, what?
What makes you tick?
Welcome to the EmpowermentCouple podcast, where your path
(00:34):
to self-mastery expands.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
My co-host is Empowerment Coach Zuri Starr.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
And he's Expansion Coach Mikey Starr.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Together, we are the.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Empowerment Couple.
Our mission is simple to serveyou, love, so you can make
informed decisions to regain andmaintain your personal power.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
We'll take you on a journey to a life filled with
purpose, passion and limitlesspossibilities, while sharing
stories of transformation,wellness hacks and healthy
habits backed by science andancient wisdom.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Plus, we'll keep you entertained with engaging games,
banter and funny innuendosalong the way.
Each episode is an excitingblend of education,
entertainment and empowermentdesigned to help you create a
mindset to be a magnet for morelove, happiness and abundance.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Together with our special guests.
We are dedicated to sharinginformation that empowers you to
co-create your most beautifullife.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
So if you're ready to embrace the power within, hit
that subscribe button and let'sembark on this empowering
journey together.
Yes, yes, for sure.
I mean, if you are an artist,you understand why you go
through the pain that you gothrough.
Whatever you go through, you'relike, oh, I'm going to turn
that into a song.
Or oh, I'm going to turn thatinto a piece of art, oh, I'm
(01:49):
going to turn that into astand-up bit, Like.
If you're an artist of any form, you know that that's important
and that's where compost comesin in this time of year.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
Love compost.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
All winter long we have been putting our scraps
into a bin and turning it, andevery single piece of scrap that
we have goes into this compost,right.
And so this time of year we'relike we have all of this great
compost.
Let's turn this compost, alsoknown as shit, okay, and let's
(02:28):
bloom some flowers.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Now, mind you, there's multiple types of
compost.
Right, there's the physicalcompost.
Right, you go outside and wehave a compost turner and all
that stuff.
But compost could also be extraweight.
Compost can also be you know, acouple bounce checks in your
history.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
And who writes checks anymore.
But yes, I know what you'retalking about, but compost can
be anything.
That is negative shit, you know.
So today's analogy is all aboutcompost being something that
has happened in your life,because none of us are
experiencing life without acontrast.
(03:12):
So compost analogy is yourcontrast, like your contrast is
something that is causing you toexpand and become more, and in
this analogy we've talked aboutit a lot about gardening and
planting seeds and really likeanything that you are looking to
grow, and right now, all of usare trying to grow ourselves or
(03:37):
aiming to grow ourselves.
We're all aiming to expand, andMike is an expansion coach and
he can tell you that the onlyway to expand is to use the
compost that comes into yourlife so that you can bloom
flowers.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Correct.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Correct so that you can grow a business, so that
your seeds have enoughnourishment.
And I would say, as anempowerment coach and a lot
working with entrepreneurs andprofessionals and performance
professionals, is that yourcompost, all those things that
(04:19):
happened in your life that wereseen as a negative or that were
painful or that made you feel acertain way.
Those are the things that, ifyou expose them and transmute
them, those are the things thatare going to have people latch
onto you and want to work withyou, because they're like if she
could get through that, then Ican get through that, and if she
(04:43):
can turn this into whateverbusiness, multimillion dollar
business, because she used thecompost rather than just getting
buried with it Cause all of uscan get buried with it Like,
sometimes it's overwhelming,Sometimes it feels like an
avalanche of shit landing on you.
And we've been there, Mike andI have been there, and recently
(05:07):
we had this experience and itinspired us to do this episode
with you about compost.
Because recently I had anexperience where I was looking
to do something financially andI wasn't paying attention to
stuff that was happening with myfinances and I got mega burned
and didn't get what I wanted outof the equation because I got
(05:33):
complacent.
I'm going to call myself out onit and if you listen to our
other episode about complacencyand your comfort zone, you know
like you have to lift the needleand in this case there was so
much compost on me that I waslike man, this is a lot of shit
that I'm going to have to fix.
I'm going to have to be oncustomer service calls.
(05:55):
I'm going to have to be on, youknow, disputing things.
I'm going to have to deal withthis fraud, stuff Like wow, this
is a lot of shit that Iattracted onto my beautiful farm
and I'm going to have torebuild.
I'm going to have to use it andfigure out why not why but I'm
(06:18):
going to have to figure out whatto do with it.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
And to that I say congratulations.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
If, if anyone, if you're, if you're sitting on,
you know you know some some badfinancial decisions.
If you're sitting on, you knowsome health related issues.
If you're sitting on, you knowif you can look back at your
life and be like, oh, thisdidn't happen and this didn't
happen, this didn't happen andjust you know just a nice
laundry list of things that arenegative.
(06:46):
Congratulations it means thatyou have an extremely fertile
garden Fertile.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
You have enough leverage.
You have enough shit, you haveenough leverage to make a
significant move.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
You just have to use it, you have to transmute it.
Take that seed analogy like youwere talking about.
You take a seed and you plantit in soil that has no
fertilization.
You're not really going to geta whole lot of of blossoms,
right?
You know that that seed isn'tit.
It doesn't have all thenutrients that it needs to grow
into its full potential.
Those seeds are your ideas.
(07:21):
Those seeds are your, yourversions of yourself, your
finances, your relationshipsthat you want to see for
yourself.
Well, if you don't have that,but you have a bunch of shit,
right?
It means, oh, I am poised toget what I want.
All I have to do is celebratemy shit.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Yeah, you got to celebrate your shit.
And I think that, from mywealthiest friends to my friends
who are just starting out, ormy daughter's friends who are
still teenagers whateverStarting out or restarting yeah,
starting out or restarting Shitis kind of just experience that
we experience in our life thatmake us expand.
(08:04):
This is why our elders, not somuch in this country but a lot
in other countries, are sowell-respected, because they
have experience, and experiencemeans that they went through
some shit.
They went through some reallyhard times that helped them
become more and that help themjust survive.
(08:27):
Honestly, like there are peoplewho are alive right now,
especially like the centurionslike that have been through
multiple rounds of war, multiple, you know.
They've been throughdepressions, they, they have
been through some shit.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Housing crises yes.
Wars yes, yes.
Famine Pandemics yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
The list is very, very long, and I think that we
are not recognizing how valuablethe voices are for our elders,
because they really know how toget through some shit and use
that shit in order to blossom,to bloom, to be fruitful, and
(09:12):
all of us have that opportunity.
It really just comes down tochoosing it.
Yeah, so we had this experiencewith a Like I was saying we've
had this experience recently.
With a like.
I was saying, like we've hadthis experience recently.
But in talking with people,young and old, most people have
had an experience in even thevery, very wealthy, like I said,
(09:33):
or the very, very just startingout, and the elders, like
people, have had an experiencewhere somebody has scammed them,
right, like, we've all had that, and it doesn't make you unique
, but it certainly does not makeit that there's something wrong
(09:57):
with you.
Correct, and I think that thatis the message that is most
important to hear when you'regoing through this is that it's
not time to lose self-respect.
It's not time to lose your selfto this shit.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
It's not happening to you.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
It is happening for you.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
For you.
Speaker 2 (10:20):
And that's hard.
There are things that, forexample, like the grief process,
when you're like this ishappening for me, like what you
(10:47):
know and losing our belovedpuggle, you know like death,
death, death, death, death,right, and I think when I look
at those situations I understandlike, okay, that was actually
happening for me because Ineeded to change my business
structure.
But I can say that now it tooktime to get here and we know
(11:13):
when somebody's older nobodylives forever we know, like
Aries, you're going to die.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
You're going to die, libra, you're going to die.
But before you die.
Speaker 2 (11:23):
But before you die, and honestly, when somebody you
love that has lived a long,beautiful life goes, you often
will get kind of like downloadsor experiences, or they will
inspire the next version of youand it's, I feel like,
(11:43):
spiritually speaking, it's a wayof them gifting to you some
wisdom that you didn't maybehave access to when they were
even alive.
It's like, okay, homeboy, timefor you to carry the torch, you
know.
Or like, hey Zuri, time for youto step up and you know, like,
live this way.
It can inspire you and it cannot just be, you know, horribly
(12:10):
awful.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
What happens right after?
In my opinion, if you do itcorrectly, what happens right
after you get dumped a bunch ofshit is the possibility of
sprouting something new insideof you.
Yeah, you know, for me I'm kindof going back to my shoulder
injury, because it was profound.
You know, having your strongarm suddenly your weak arm,
(12:35):
you're like what the heck?
You know and I'm a balancedperson yoga meditation.
So when half of my body was notworking, you know, there was a
part of me that was like youknow, why is this happening to
me?
Why is this?
Why is this?
But I used it right.
I used it to turn the dial andnow my body is healthier than it
(12:55):
had been in the last 20 years.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
And in proximity to you.
I used it to deepen some of myhealing ability and I called in
different healing devices, and Icalled in different healing
devices and I called indifferent like healers, and my
own ability expanded for healing.
You know, like there was lots ofReiki, there was lots of like
intuitive downloads, and it'slike, okay, we need to do this.
(13:17):
And like, okay, we need to dothis, and like just pivoting to
be of purpose to your struggle,you know, and like that's that's
where, if you allow yourpartner to be, you know your,
your, your VIP when you are down.
You know, like you allow themto be the star player while you
(13:40):
were, like on the bench.
If you allow that to happen,just see, like, how much you
expand by taking.
You know, kind of like you hadto rest, like you had to, you
had to take a a more feminineapproach to healing, which is
really hard as a male, and, likeyour, your ability to do that,
(14:02):
though, made you more balanced,correct, and that's where it is
interesting.
Like life just gives you that,like, oh, we gave you this shit
because you actually needed toexpand this part of yourself.
Speaker 1 (14:15):
And then once, once I got past that, then I'm looking
back at my life and I'm likewait a minute.
I had I've had the power to dothat the whole time.
I didn't have to wait until Igot sick to get healthy.
I could have just beenhealthier and even healthier.
So when you get past one ofthose scenarios right where you
heal yourself or you sprout in abed of shit or fertilizer, it
(14:40):
gives you inspiration to lookacross your life and be like
okay, so I was able to fix this,I'm going to fix this, this and
this.
I'm going to level myself upbecause Level up?
Because I'm either movingforward or I'm moving backwards.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
There's no such thing as pause.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Okay, so I have a funny game to play with you.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Okay, so we're going to use the shit and the flower
analogy.
Okay, and I want you todescribe short, short
description.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
Short description.
I'll do my best.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Yeah, I want you to describe three times where you
took shit and you turn it intoflowers.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
My in and out with corporate was shit.
Right, my experience withcorporate America was shit, and
from that experience I blossomedinto our current level of
living, where I had theopportunity to raise our
daughter and-.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Create your own schedule.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
Create my own schedule, not trying to time for
money and rebirth myself basedon my skill sets, not on um
skill sets that I needed inorder to do a mundane job.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Ooh, I love that.
That's good, Okay.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Number two number two I'm going to say health,
because health was definitely aum, uh, a major, uh, major
player in my everyday activitiesand being able to go from a
place of pain and discomfort toa place of power and flexibility
Super nice.
And then just my third, ofcourse, would be, you know, the
(16:26):
good old-fashioned daddy issuethat I have Issues, issues
Plural, my plural daddy issues.
But you know, my number onedaddy issue, of course, was, you
know, the abandonment and nothaving him around my life To
rebrand who I am, because I'mnot living any type of pattern
(16:49):
laid out from him, because therewas no pattern there, right,
the only pattern that was therewas abandonment.
So I was able to take that andbe part of Zarell's life every
single day.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Our daughter's life.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Every single day.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (17:06):
I went from having, yeah, Our daughter's life Every
single day, Like you know.
I went from from having, yeah,it's, it's, it's, it's that,
it's, it's that you know thoseshitty things.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
You turned into flowers flowers.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
What about you?
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Um, I could do this.
I could tell you the threethings, or I can tell you three
more things to build you up andto fill up your cup, because
there's three other things thatI actually thought you were
going to say, and I think thatwould be a funnier part of the
game.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Oh, so you have your own list of my fuck ups.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Well, I, I'm kidding.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
Yeah, I thought you were going to say this, michael.
Remember when you did this andyou fell on your ass?
Why didn't you say this one?
Let me see my list.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
No, that's not what I was saying.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
You're talking about keep it light, but you pulled
out your own scroll.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
I didn't say keep it light, I said keep it short.
I mean, we don't go light, wego like you know here's my
heaviness Like let's go deep.
Let's go deep and really dig inthis shit and really make
flowers.
This podcast alone right now,what we are doing, talking this
way where we are honest andradically willing to put it all
(18:18):
out there.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
And serve love.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
And serve love.
Like that is us digging in theshit to make the flowers, and we
hope that it.
You know, our hope, ourconcentrated effort of doing
these shows, is that you takethe shit that we are exposing
and maybe you look at some ofyour shit and then maybe you're
(18:40):
like, hey, I could turn thatinto flowers.
Like you know, it's starting tosound like a Miley Cyrus song,
yeah, but here's three things.
Here's three things.
Okay, here's three things thatI thought you were going to say
so, and no, it's not, because Ihave a long list of all the
things that you've, you know,had done or like no.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
But you do have a list.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
Well, of course, I'm a wife.
We have lists.
Okay, don't get it twisted.
So what I was going to say isthat you, I was going to say
that you took the issues thatyou had, for example, with
alcohol and you turned it into ayoga practice Correct.
(19:25):
And you turned the issues thatyou had with like focus into a
meditation practice Correct.
And you turned the issues thatyou had with your situation of
feeling like you were stuck insome generational bullshit, some
, some cycles, and you decidedyou're going to be a cycle
(19:47):
breaker and, in your healingprocess, help other people heal
Correct.
So those would be three waysthat I would say you took shit
that was given to you, that youinherited, that you encountered,
that you experienced becauseyou needed some compost to
create those flowers Correct.
So that's what I would say.
(20:08):
I can do my own too, but I justwanted to reflect that that I
see you and I appreciate howmuch you have expanded and how
much you have turned a wholebunch of shit into some
beautiful flowers which, by theway, btw, mike gives me flowers
almost every week which, by theway, btw, mike gives me flowers
almost every week and when I domy coaching calls or I'm in
(20:29):
sessions with clients for thevarious businesses, I always
have flowers next to me oncamera.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
What does Tony say?
If you do the things in thebeginning of the relationship,
at the end of the relationship,there's not an end to the
relationship.
Yes, you're my biggest asset,honey.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
You're mine.
So I'm going to, I'm going tocontinue planting beautiful
seeds in your big pile of shit.
I was like, oh, where is thisgoing?
He said planting seeds and Iwas just like what I'm like?
Am I ovulating?
Speaker 1 (21:09):
Some of the times where he's like I'm a shit bag.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
Oh, oh, let me grab my seeds real quick.
Wait a minute, I am not shit, Iam not, I am not the pile of
shit.
Speaker 1 (21:18):
How did this go there ?
Well, we know I'm talking aboutwhen you get woe is me.
When I get woe is me.
When I get woe is me, the veryfirst thing that you do, I feel
like your finger is just likepushing seeds into my soul, like
, oh, oh, oh, you feel bad aboutyourself.
Boom, boom, boom, boom, andthen as a what are the seeds?
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Well, give me an example.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
That doesn't sound very good the seeds are like you
can make a lot of money doingthis, or you can be very happy
doing this, or, you know, if youstopped beating yourself up on
a regular basis, you're going toexperience this.
And at the time as you'reshoving your finger in my
self-loathing, I'm like no, getyour fingers out of there.
(22:02):
But, within a couple of hours,you're like oh, what is this?
It's like is this movement Likewhoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa?
I didn't know, I could be alittle bit happier today.
Like, oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
So you're saying you need a safe word?
Speaker 1 (22:15):
A safe word.
There's no such thing as safewords.
Speaker 2 (22:17):
You said you're sticking your fingers here and
you're sticking them like whatwould be your safe word Zeo Maxi
Wombdweebee.
Oh, I can't say that, Come on.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Super Califragilistic Expealadocious.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
Supercalifragilistic Expealadocious.
Oh yeah, Okay, that's our safeword, oh yeah, okay, supersonic.
Supersonic.
Yeah, let's just have it bethat.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
So sometimes when you're, when you're digging in
my shit, you're, you're not,you're not, you're not digging
in it, you're just planting.
Speaker 2 (23:00):
Yeah, and I would say that you and I have had what
we're doing right now the banter.
We haven't stopped giving eachother shit in terms of like
messing with each other in abanter way since we met.
So, going back to do the thingsthat you know worked in your
relationship in the beginning.
Don't stop doing them, becauseyou'll never have an end if you
(23:21):
continue to carry those out, andmost of us do get complacent
and most of us don't use thethings that happen to our
relationship as compost.
I know plenty of relationshipsthat have had the worst things
that can happen in arelationship where there was
infidelity or fraud or divorceand they have figured out how to
actually use those things andturn them into something Correct
(23:44):
, and so the choice is yours.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
By the way, as you're dealing with your own shit your
own fertilizer be very carefulnot to take your fertilizer and
put it to someone else's gardenbed.
Right, Keep your own shit, it'svaluable.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
Right, don't try to offset, don't try to blame your
shit on someone else, yep,because it's literally removing
your potency yep right.
So if you have shitty things inyour past, own them.
Those are yours, protect them,transmute that.
Don't try to take your shit andput it in someone else and be
like oh you know, you're thereason for this and you're the
(24:23):
reason for this.
That doesn't work.
It doesn't transmute.
The same way it may empoweryour partner to transmute twice
as much as you and then you'releft behind.
So your shit is your fertilizer.
It's going to allow you to growat a level that is right for
(24:46):
you at the time.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
Yeah, and you know your, your partner, is going to
be a reflection of you, unlessyou drift apart and then you
separate.
Because oftentimes what I'mexperiencing in working with
like couples and you knowclients who end up inadvertently
(25:09):
telling me all about theirrelationships is that you have
the ability to grow together orgrow apart.
And when you start blaming theother person for anything
negative that's happened in yourlife that's the example of what
Mike is saying Like in realtalk terms when you blame your
(25:31):
partner for why you are notbeing successful in any area of
your life or you blame therelationship, you are literally
taking whatever shit that hasbeen gifted to you and you're
putting it.
You're not using it.
It's literally going to die,Like when compost gets exposed
to the elements it dies, themicrobes go away and they no
(25:54):
longer can fertilize the soil,and so you are essentially
saying, oh, I'm not successfulbecause I am.
You know, it's his fault,because he blah, blah, blah.
And it's like you don'tunderstand that person is there
as an agitator to help you breakyour seed and help you grow.
And oftentimes the reallytumultuous relationships that
(26:16):
have like intense amount ofpassion, where they fight hard
and they love hard, those peoplehave like metamorphic growth,
Correct, Because there's so muchagitation and heat and you will
look at where most of yourproduce comes from.
It's going to come if you livein the US.
(26:38):
It's going to come from thestates that have a lot of heat
and fertile soil and a lot offriction, and fertile soil and a
lot of friction and, obviously,farmers that know how to tend
to the soil and the water andthe air, and that produce is
(27:10):
only going to be able to begrown because they used inputs
into the soil and they used thethings that were waste
essentially and turned it intogrowth.
I turn it into flowers anddelicious fruits and let me tell
you, I, I are, we are we toodeep in this analogy.
No, no, no, no I, I do.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
I do feel sorry for those individuals who are born
on the planet with everythingright.
They didn't have to work foranything.
Everything was given to them,you know.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
It's like Michael Beckwith always says like you do
not want an easy life.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
You don't want an easy life because there's no
growth.
Yeah, right, you know the daysin.
If you look back, you'd be like, oh, you know, I spent a bunch
of money and I went on a bunchof trips and did this and did
this, but what did I actually do?
Right?
How did I move?
How did I transform myself?
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Did you leave an impact?
Did you make an impact?
Did you leave a legacy?
You know.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
That's why I'm always saying celebrate your shit Like
if you come from you know somehardships.
That is your fertilizer.
That is your fertilizer.
That means you have more matterto create with than someone who
does not have as hard of a life.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
And here's the thing is that you have to also shift
the focus, because if you'rejust focusing on your shit like
let's take, like you know, um,me too, let's take a, me too, me
too If you are just focusing onthe bad things that happened to
you and you're just looking toexpose something that that's bad
(28:39):
, that happened to you, youaren't taking the opportunity.
You're smirking at me.
What You're like, oh, she'stalking about me too.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
She's doing, me too.
She tap dances through this onelike oh, she's getting canceled
.
I was like a black light.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
The ticket set back here okay, well, I can take
something else.
But like, if you look atsomething where there are a
bunch of victims, valid victims,people who went through
something and you know arelooking to expose it and bring
light to it, that's a beautifulthing, right.
But if you are focusing on itas a way to get retribution and
(29:21):
you know revenge or name anyword, that is the same as
revenge, you know, know, oryou're looking to get attention
serving the ego or whatever'shappening around that.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
The payback.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
Right the payback, like, if you're looking for that
, you are going to put yourselfin victim mode and not use that
compost Correct.
And while I'm all for exposing,I am also all for using that
compost, the shit that you wentthrough through and turning it
into something.
And you notice like people dothat all the time.
That's why there's beautifulfoundations started for what you
(29:54):
know, women's centers, andthere's so many things that are
beautiful that came out of thatmovement.
And I just want to give thatexample because there's a lot of
contention there and I'm alwaysgoing to be on the side of
people who want to exposesomething, bring light to it, to
change a system, to radically,you know, enhance a the
(30:15):
awareness, and then then what?
And then the then what?
Is you better turn it intosomething where you retain your
power and you regain your uhability to use that shit to
create something Correct,because if you just stay focused
on this shit, you're going tosuffer, and suffering is what
(30:37):
Still for suckers Always.
Suffering is for suckers, and sowe don't want that Empowerment
couple like the empowerment isbig.
The couple is just who we are.
We're a couple.
In case you're new to us, mikeand I are a couple, but our job
(30:59):
is to serve you, empowerment andlove as much as possible.
So it would do you no good tostay in victim mode in whatever
movement, in any movement.
And I'm a white woman, mike's ablack man.
He mentioned black lives matter.
I'm like I'm not going to speakto that.
You could speak to that and youcan educate on that, because
(31:20):
like that could be another placethat I get canceled.
And here's what I'm looking todo.
I'm looking to continue toexpand our voices in unity and
in love and unity consciousness.
And we often don't talk aboutpolitical issues because it is
meant to divide you.
It is meant for you to feel andstand on one side or the other,
(31:42):
and that also does not serveyou.
Anything that you want to getdone gets done in union and
harmony.
If we go back to the gardenanalogy, you can't grow crops
without harmony and union.
You have to have union with thesoil.
You have to have union with theweather, which means you need
(32:04):
sunshine, you're going to needsome rain or you're going to
have to irrigate.
I'm three generations offarmers.
I'm a farmer's daughter, so Ican go really deep with this
analogy.
You have to have soil inputs,there has to be worms in your
soil, y'all You've got to havepollinators.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
And you've got to have the right seeds.
Speaker 2 (32:24):
And you have to have the right seeds, and your seeds
can't be contaminated or old.
There's so much that goes intoit and so much union and so much
biodiversity.
You have to have that.
And if you, if you want to belike I hate men because of this
(32:45):
movement or I hate cops becauseof this movement, or anything
politically driven that is meantto make you choose one side or
the other, that is meant to makeyou choose one side or the
other, you are going to miss outon the beauty of this
experience, which is everyoneserves a purpose.
You serve a purpose, I serve apurpose.
Empowered Posse, you serve apurpose.
You are part of this biodiverseeconomy and economic system.
(33:06):
And just plan it.
And if you take one thing away,just look to nature to
understand what happens.
If you take away the coyotes,the population of rabbits
explodes, or skunks or whatever.
Pick the thing.
It's always If you take awaysomething, you're going to have
(33:28):
an imbalance.
So we need everyone, we needall ideas, we need everyone's
thoughts.
We don't need to be cancelingeach other.
We need to be like oh, you'rehaving a human experience, let's
give them some exposure therapyto like something else, rather
than being like you're canceledby go live in your hole, you
know like.
No, let's use the shit that wedo and the things that we don't
(33:52):
understand and and help eachother and live in union and
figure out how to come togetherand create the co-create, the
reality of happiness.
Speaker 1 (34:04):
Yeah, right, so seeds of happiness.
So see the happiness.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
Yeah, and you can't, you cannot do it alone.
No, there's nothing that isborn and grown without harmony.
Speaker 1 (34:17):
The only thing in life that you could do alone is
die.
Speaker 2 (34:21):
That's it and that's what you, you likely, you know
at the end, it's just you.
Yeah, you might have peoplearound you, you know around you.
If you were lucky enough togrow into old age, you might
have people that are around you,but at the end, it's you and
only you, and you have to feelgood about all the shit that you
(34:41):
went through and what youturned it into.
Speaker 1 (34:43):
Covet your shit.
Covet your shit, seriously,covet your shit.
Your shit is gold, your shit isgold.
And if you don't have enoughshit, create some shit.
Speaker 2 (34:56):
And if your shit is bananas B-A-N-A-N-A-S, then hey,
you are in the right tribe withthe Empowerment Couple.
We are so grateful for you,Empowered Posse, and because we
love you so much, let's read areview.
Let's do this.
This one is coming from EarlCartwright, 558.
(35:20):
He says, yes, five stars Lovethe distraction playlist Perfect
, thank you.
Stars love the distractionplaylist, perfect, thank you.
And, by the way, what Earl istalking about is that we have
playlists that we share on ourpodcast.
On occasion they will be linkedin the show notes.
(35:42):
So, on that note, that's allfor us today, sending you the
highest vibrations.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
You are held.
Speaker 2 (35:55):
You are loved.
Thanks for being an importantmember of our Empowered.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
Posse Want next level access to the empowerment
couple.
Explore our private groupcoaching services to get
hands-on life-changingexperiences and sign up for one
of our empowering coursesdesigned to fast track your
success using the link in theshow notes.
Speaker 2 (36:10):
We intentionally keep this show ad free so you can
have a fully immersiveexperience with us.
Every episode is sponsored byone of our products or trusted
affiliates.
As long as you keep supportingthe show, we can keep showing up
every week to serve you, love.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
If you're inspired to serve love in return, leave us
a review and click the sharebutton to grow our empowered
posse.
Speaker 2 (36:32):
We love you.
Speaker 1 (36:35):
And just a reminder reviews are like spiritual coins
, spiritual currency.
So as you give us reviews, youare enlightening us and you're
You're filling up ourmetaphorical piggy bank.
Speaker 2 (36:49):
Correct us, and you are.
You're filling up ourmetaphorical piggy bank correct
so that we can use that and giveit back to you, and it's
creating a beautiful cycle ofgiving.
Speaker 1 (36:57):
So thank you thank you for the deposit thank you
for the deposit.
Speaker 2 (37:03):
Thank you, we love you.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!