Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
UNKNOWN (00:00):
music.
SPEAKER_01 (00:32):
Welcome once again
to the XJW Network Show.
I am Mitch.
Usually I would have Smurf Girlwith me, but we're doing a
little something special today.
If you saw, both of us posted onour accounts about dear Uncle
(00:55):
Tony.
He said he would be here.
I'm hoping he don't stand me up.
I'm looking for, hey.
SPEAKER_00 (01:04):
What?
Is that you, Tony?
Oh, God.
Mitch, is that
SPEAKER_02 (01:09):
you?
This is me.
SPEAKER_00 (01:10):
Oh, God.
Hey.
SPEAKER_02 (01:12):
Tony,
SPEAKER_00 (01:13):
what's up?
It's me.
How are you?
It's been a rough year.
SPEAKER_01 (01:21):
It's
SPEAKER_00 (01:21):
been
SPEAKER_01 (01:23):
rough.
SPEAKER_00 (01:28):
Did you recognize
me?
Can you recognize me?
This is my incognito hat.
SPEAKER_01 (01:32):
I barely did it
because of the hat.
SPEAKER_00 (01:36):
I
SPEAKER_01 (01:37):
am.
And a loose
SPEAKER_00 (01:39):
band.
Is Smurf Girl in here, is she?
No, no.
God, I hate that girl.
I
SPEAKER_01 (01:43):
sent her out to the
store.
SPEAKER_00 (01:45):
Okay, good.
You don't like my partner
SPEAKER_01 (01:49):
in crime?
You don't like my partner incrime?
SPEAKER_00 (01:54):
Well, we got an
alliance.
we got a dunkel tony smoke girlalliance but i'm just too shy to
see her in person oh
SPEAKER_01 (02:04):
okay all right yeah
he's my friend okay
SPEAKER_00 (02:09):
all right well she's
my niece i'm her uncle tony you
know oh mitch i just came fromthe assembly pure pure worship
my ass my ass boys you kick meoff the body and then you have
(02:30):
the nerve to do claim pureworship how can i be
SPEAKER_01 (02:35):
pure without uncle
tony how can i be pure without
uncle tony
SPEAKER_00 (02:39):
i know that was the
most purest form of worship
there was
SPEAKER_01 (02:45):
you
SPEAKER_00 (02:46):
were
SPEAKER_01 (02:47):
i enjoyed every
minute of
SPEAKER_00 (02:48):
it
SPEAKER_01 (02:49):
every time i enjoyed
SPEAKER_00 (02:52):
it
SPEAKER_01 (02:52):
First, you heard
from my big brother, Sam.
Have you heard from
SPEAKER_00 (02:57):
him?
Oh, you know.
Yeah.
Well, I shouldn't say.
Don't want him to get DF'dbecause of me.
He's a brother from anothermother, Mitch.
SPEAKER_01 (03:10):
I know.
SPEAKER_00 (03:10):
We're like
SPEAKER_01 (03:11):
this.
All four of us are like this.
SPEAKER_00 (03:15):
I know.
He's the only one that backed meup.
Because he's the only one thatfeels that way about them women,
them broads at the Kingdom Hop,you know?
He feels about broads like I do,you know?
I got yoga pants on right now,you see?
(03:35):
I got yoga pants on.
I'm like, whatever.
Whatever.
SPEAKER_01 (03:41):
You threw caution to
the wind.
You're wearing yoga
SPEAKER_00 (03:44):
pants too?
Yes.
You know what, Mitch?
SPEAKER_02 (03:49):
i'm
SPEAKER_00 (03:50):
sorry i gotta take a
break because i gotta take i got
i went to the i just went to thepharmacy and got my medicine do
you mind if i take it that's
SPEAKER_01 (03:59):
fine are you well
SPEAKER_00 (04:00):
do you got some
medicine too i
SPEAKER_01 (04:03):
do
SPEAKER_00 (04:03):
you want some
SPEAKER_01 (04:05):
i have
SPEAKER_00 (04:05):
some yeah uncle tony
likes a good shooter the jumbo
kind jumbo shooter I had two,but I was at the assembly, so I,
you know, needed to crack oneopen.
Crack it open.
SPEAKER_01 (04:27):
Cheers to you, Unc.
SPEAKER_00 (04:29):
Cheers.
Which side are you on, this sideor that side?
SPEAKER_01 (04:34):
The other side.
SPEAKER_00 (04:35):
This side?
SPEAKER_01 (04:36):
There you go.
Cheers.
SPEAKER_00 (04:39):
Cheers.
SPEAKER_01 (04:42):
You know they can do
that now.
SPEAKER_00 (04:44):
Oh, that's the good
stuff.
I feel annoying that again.
I feel annoying that again.
SPEAKER_01 (04:49):
They couldn't take
that from you?
SPEAKER_00 (04:52):
Oh yeah, they
frisked me.
They frisked me when I left.
SPEAKER_01 (04:56):
They
SPEAKER_00 (04:56):
were like, bend
over, Tony.
Bend over.
And I was like, no.
They're gonna.
And you know what they did?
They gave me my old clothesback.
They took my good wardrobe.
They said it was property ofWashtock, and I had to wear my
80s clothes again.
SPEAKER_01 (05:17):
Oh, maybe it's your
own, Toni.
Okay, let's get into this.
SPEAKER_00 (05:21):
Okay.
SPEAKER_01 (05:24):
Did you know, before
they kicked you off, did you
have any inkling that they weregoing to do that to you?
SPEAKER_00 (05:34):
Honestly, I'd been
treading a thin line for a long
time, and I knew I was a thawguy.
so i i took it on the chinbecause um uncle tony do that
you
SPEAKER_01 (05:47):
know right
SPEAKER_00 (05:48):
hey you know what
you you like a good stogie you
like a good a guy with a damnhoney berry ones look at that i
want i want only what is up withyou i i want what is that called
when when they like sponsor me ineed to be sponsored by fireball
SPEAKER_01 (06:08):
Oh my goodness.
SPEAKER_00 (06:09):
And the honey berry
stogies.
SPEAKER_01 (06:11):
But look, you used
to be so straight and narrow.
Now you drinking fireball andyou about to light up.
Like what happened?
SPEAKER_00 (06:23):
I always did.
One time out of desperation, Iused my program as rolling
papers.
You know, you ever done that?
You ever done that?
Like, you know, you're licking.
SPEAKER_01 (06:42):
I cannot say I've
done that.
No, you know who taught me to dothat?
Who?
Don't say.
You know what?
Well, I was about to say, don'tsay my brother.
You know what?
SPEAKER_00 (06:55):
Sorry.
I'm so full of myself, I don'tlet you talk.
SPEAKER_01 (06:59):
My brother is not
rolling blunts.
SPEAKER_00 (07:03):
No, he's got a dude
like Snoop that has him rolling
for him.
He won't roll his own no more.
Come on.
You make the body, you got arolling paper guy.
SPEAKER_01 (07:14):
Wow.
SPEAKER_00 (07:16):
Now I'm going to
crack this sucker open.
I know you got one too, Mitch.
SPEAKER_01 (07:22):
Huh?
SPEAKER_00 (07:23):
I know you got one
too.
SPEAKER_01 (07:25):
I
SPEAKER_00 (07:26):
can feel the Holy
Spirit tell me you got one.
SPEAKER_01 (07:29):
I've been known to
puff on something, you know.
I got two things going overhere.
Yeah.
There you go.
SPEAKER_00 (07:37):
Nah, they made me go
out like smoke.
I knew when I was blowing outthat match that that was it,
man.
That was it.
That was it.
I was going to do it good.
What kind of match idea?
They told me to do it.
They told you to.
I did.
Jehovah's Enemies.
(08:00):
Like smoke.
Oh, God, I got to let go.
SPEAKER_02 (08:03):
That was
SPEAKER_00 (08:04):
profound.
I know it was.
uncle smoke tony your ass
SPEAKER_01 (08:10):
so listen you you
made a lot of brothers upset
okay
SPEAKER_00 (08:15):
yeah
SPEAKER_01 (08:16):
do you know how good
no why because you told us that
yoga pants were not allowed
SPEAKER_00 (08:29):
well
SPEAKER_01 (08:30):
we didn't like
SPEAKER_00 (08:31):
rumors Well, it's
only, okay, let me get you
straight about it.
Yoga pants is only illegal withthe ugly broads.
If you're good looking, it'sfine.
You know, it's only when themugly ones wear them, which is,
you know, I don't care ifanybody else wears them.
(08:54):
It's fine.
Just, you know, we don't need tosee you coming.
SPEAKER_01 (08:59):
Come on, man.
You can't offend people likethat.
Come on.
SPEAKER_00 (09:05):
I'm Uncle Tony.
That's what Uncle Tony thinks.
Not me.
Not my opinion.
SPEAKER_01 (09:15):
Were you the only
one who had that viewpoint about
yoga pants on the body?
Were you the only one on thebody who had that viewpoint?
SPEAKER_00 (09:22):
No, Sammy feels the
same way too.
Gloria and Susan took yoga onetime and it was a mess.
So we're anti-yoga.
You know what?
Yoga pants turns into yoga, andthen yoga's pagan, all right?
Yoga's pagan.
(09:43):
You can't be wearing the pantsof pagan yoga and be okay,
right?
UNKNOWN (09:52):
But...
SPEAKER_01 (09:52):
It's just a
wardrobe, you know?
I don't think they are gettinginto it that deeply.
They just want to wear somethingthat's comfortable.
Oh, I have to run errands.
I have to go to the store.
Let me throw these on.
What's wrong with that?
SPEAKER_00 (10:08):
Nothing.
That's why I'm wearing themright now.
I got them on.
I didn't realize that they lookuncomfortable.
They look uncomfortable.
I can practically full-on do thesplits.
SPEAKER_01 (10:20):
oh
SPEAKER_00 (10:20):
oh this stogie is
like almost broken man
SPEAKER_01 (10:23):
oh i
SPEAKER_00 (10:26):
know i didn't
realize they were so comfortable
now i wear them all the time tooso does sammy you should see
mark sanderson he thinks he cando karate
SPEAKER_01 (10:36):
no i don't want to
see that now oh why that
SPEAKER_00 (10:42):
was a bad idea did
SPEAKER_01 (10:45):
they nominate you to
be the one that give the tough
talks
SPEAKER_00 (10:50):
Say that again.
SPEAKER_01 (10:50):
Did the body
nominate you to give the tough
talks?
Why did you always give thestern, like, hard talks?
SPEAKER_00 (10:59):
Because I'm the only
one that's got the balls to do
it.
Oh, wow.
And I'm like everybody's UncleTony.
I'm like your dad, you know?
And so I go up there all daddingon you, you know?
That was you?
(11:20):
I'm sorry.
Yeah, like, you know, like whenyour jackass dad goes up on the
stage and he's yapping like ahypocrite.
Everybody's got one.
And so I was the hypocrite dadone, you know.
And so that was my role.
Like the seven dwarfs, that wasmy role.
(11:40):
God, I need more medicine.
SPEAKER_01 (11:42):
Oh, boy, look at
you.
You're tearing it up.
So, like, when you left...
Or let's just call it what itis.
When they kicked you off, what
SPEAKER_00 (11:53):
did you do?
They
SPEAKER_01 (11:55):
lynched me.
They lynched you?
Yeah.
What did Uncle Tony do afterthey just got, like, dropped you
so coldly?
SPEAKER_00 (12:07):
They caught me
wearing tight pants.
They caught me wearing tightjeans.
It was a fight.
Smurf girl was right.
That's why I don't want herhere, because I don't want to
tell her she was right.
How was she right?
And you were right, andeverybody else was right.
How was my girl right?
(12:27):
She should be able to wear pantsto the meeting if she wants to.
UNKNOWN (12:33):
Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_00 (12:34):
And that beards
ain't so pagan.
SPEAKER_01 (12:36):
No.
SPEAKER_00 (12:37):
Beards ain't so
pagan.
SPEAKER_01 (12:39):
And that it was real
stupid.
My brother looks nice with thebeard.
SPEAKER_00 (12:44):
I know.
Well, you know, it's that a lotof those JW brothers do look
good with beards.
SPEAKER_02 (12:50):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (12:51):
And it seems that
some of the brothers that don't,
don't like it when they see aguy looking real sharp.
Like, you know, the guys, theguy, I'm sure y'all probably
confused me for Rick Fearing.
You know, I'm not Rick Fearing,I'm Uncle Tony.
But...
there are some brothers thatit's like they get jealous of
(13:15):
the way a guy looks in a beardyou know if he comes in looking
all you know like derek jeter orsomething with a beard and all
pop ass you know like you startlooking like the most
interesting man in the world butthen you can't do a beard
there's beard jealous there'sbeard jealousy and it started
(13:36):
with rutherford being beardjealous And so, you know, then
nobody, it's like, oh, he's sogood and he's so into his beard
and he's so good looking withhis beard.
And then, so then they saynobody can have beards.
And it's like, that ain't
SPEAKER_02 (13:53):
cool.
SPEAKER_01 (13:54):
So you left and they
come out with these new
guidelines.
They allow different things.
The governing body hasconcluded.
So how do you feel that thewomen can wear pants now?
SPEAKER_00 (14:09):
I don't even go
anymore.
I can't even look at it.
I can't even.
I went to the cell.
I'm done.
I'm done.
No, I mean, seriously.
And it's chaos.
It's a free-for-all.
They were wearing at theassembly.
They were, you know, because Ijust went today.
And they were wearingsweatpants.
SPEAKER_01 (14:31):
No.
SPEAKER_00 (14:33):
Smurf girl told me
about it.
They were wearing.
She saw it, too.
Yep.
They were wearing sweatpants.
They wear t-shirts and jeans.
SPEAKER_01 (14:46):
Wow.
SPEAKER_00 (14:47):
It seriously is a
free-for-all.
SPEAKER_01 (14:49):
So you left the
hammer.
I used to call you the hammer.
The hammer leaves and it's like,come as you are now.
SPEAKER_00 (14:59):
Wow.
Yeah.
It's like, I think they know theend is coming regardless.
Like, the end's coming and Andthey might as well, it's like
casual Friday at the KingdomHop.
Casual Friday.
Just casual Friday.
It's like, let's just let herhair down.
Oh, you know, I should probablylet him guide.
(15:21):
Uh-oh.
It's getting hot in here.
No, it's like casual Friday atthe Kingdom Hop.
Oh, no.
SPEAKER_01 (15:28):
You just like, you
wear yoga pants.
You've got a ponytail.
Damn, Tony.
SPEAKER_00 (15:34):
Well, I grew my hair
up.
Hey, beards is okay.
I can't grow a beard.
I'm the kind of guy that can'tgrow a beard, but I grew my hair
out, and I wear a man buneverywhere I go.
Why?
I know, but I'm still bald up ontop.
SPEAKER_01 (15:50):
Oh, you've got a man
bun cul-de-sac.
Wow.
I do.
That's neat.
I do.
Wow.
SPEAKER_00 (15:56):
God, I know
neckties.
I wore a necktie to theassembly.
I wore a necktie to theassembly.
SPEAKER_01 (16:05):
When you went to the
assembly today, did it make you
miss it?
SPEAKER_00 (16:09):
Yes.
Well, it made me realize I don'tthink I mind being a part of the
great crowd.
They treated me just like thepiece of shit great crowd.
That's what they did.
I walk in, they're like, hey,don't you treat me like no piece
of shit great crowd.
I'm anointed.
(16:29):
And they forgot.
They were treating me like anormal great crowd.
And I was offended.
SPEAKER_01 (16:38):
no
SPEAKER_00 (16:41):
they did just like
that was just great crowd just
uncle tony's not great crowdokay uncle
SPEAKER_01 (16:50):
you're gonna offend
mine and smurf girls uh listener
base first you say ugly womencan't wear yoga pants now you're
saying piece of great crap comeon now
SPEAKER_00 (17:03):
i'm wrong I'm broke.
They broke Uncle Tony.
They broke me.
They broke Uncle Tony.
I don't even know up from down.
SPEAKER_01 (17:16):
Do you still feel
the end is near?
How do you feel about that?
SPEAKER_00 (17:22):
The end of the
organization is near.
You can taste it.
SPEAKER_01 (17:27):
I mean the world.
SPEAKER_00 (17:30):
Nah.
UNKNOWN (17:31):
Nah.
SPEAKER_01 (17:31):
That
SPEAKER_00 (17:32):
was a lie.
When I said that on thebroadcast, that was a lie.
I lied.
I want to admit, almosteverything, I was a big giant
hypocrite.
A hypocrite.
Just a big giant crit.
And I was a liar.
And I was a jerk.
And I admit it.
(17:52):
Is this a court of law, Mitch?
You look like a judge.
I, Uncle Tony Morris, admit...
that I was a big hypocrite and aliar.
So whatever you think as a liar.
SPEAKER_01 (18:07):
Wow.
SPEAKER_00 (18:09):
Yeah.
I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_01 (18:11):
So everything,
everything I thought was real
and true is fake.
SPEAKER_00 (18:18):
Oh yeah.
It's all scripted.
SPEAKER_01 (18:20):
Oh wow.
Wow.
SPEAKER_00 (18:23):
Yeah.
Everything's all scripted, man.
SPEAKER_01 (18:26):
There's some rumors
going around.
Let me ask you this.
Um, Where are you living thesedays, all?
SPEAKER_00 (18:35):
I'm trying to light
this thing.
I'm sleeping on Smurf Girl'scouch right there.
I sleep on her couch.
What?
She didn't tell me that.
Say it again.
SPEAKER_01 (18:51):
She didn't tell me
that.
SPEAKER_00 (18:54):
No, I know.
I told her to swear me tosecrecy.
No, I just showed up justyesterday.
You know my favorite trenchcoat?
You remember my favorite trenchcoat?
Susan threw it in the dumpster.
My wife, Susan, she threw it inthe dumpster.
She threw me out.
(19:15):
And so I came knocking on SmurfGirl's door.
I said, hey, I need a place tobe.
Can I sleep on your couch?
So she's letting me.
Damn.
SPEAKER_01 (19:26):
Not the trench coat
of the famous picture of you in
the store.
That trench
SPEAKER_00 (19:31):
coat?
Oh, the liquor store one?
That's my favorite liquor storecoat.
I thought nobody could recognizeme.
I was wearing my hat.
SPEAKER_01 (19:42):
We know you, Uncle
Tony.
SPEAKER_00 (19:45):
I've been doing it
for years.
Nobody else saw.
I thought I could just...
Get rid of it a couple of times.
SPEAKER_01 (19:53):
I think you would
throw us off now with the hat,
the man bun, and the yoga pants.
SPEAKER_00 (19:58):
I know, but you
still recognize me, don't you?
I
SPEAKER_01 (20:01):
barely did.
It was hard, though.
I barely did.
SPEAKER_00 (20:04):
I know.
You can hardly tell me and SmurfGirl apart.
We're like twinsies.
We're like twinsies.
Gosh.
Hot in a suit coat.
What's that?
no and you know what she didshe's so worldly she taught me
(20:27):
how to vape you too what i'mseeing you do what you do and i
started i went first thing i didis i put my hat on and went to
go buy a vape
SPEAKER_01 (20:37):
uncle tony i will i
would never ever vape uncle tony
SPEAKER_00 (20:43):
yeah me neither god
no neckties We're not even
civilized at the hall anymore.
SPEAKER_01 (20:54):
Not even.
I know.
It was weird.
It was weird.
SPEAKER_00 (20:58):
Might as well
disfellowship everybody.
SPEAKER_01 (21:01):
As a matter of fact,
because I was still there a
little bit physically when theychanged the dress code.
And I used to tell all theelders, I was like, what would
Tony say?
Like, what the hell would Tonysay?
I
SPEAKER_00 (21:17):
know.
Yeah.
I'm like, go for it.
Who cares anymore?
Who cares?
We're the religion that thinks ademonized smurf ran down the
aisle of the Kingdom Hop.
We have to be as equally stupidas that.
We don't disappoint in thestupid department, now do
SPEAKER_01 (21:39):
we?
We don't.
I'm no part of it anymore.
I don't know.
SPEAKER_00 (21:44):
There's not one
person on the face of the planet
that would ever say, oh, theJehovah's Witnesses would never
be so stupid as to think a smurfran down the aisle at Kingdom
Hall.
Not one person ever says that.
Not one person denies that aJehovah's Witness would think
that and be scared of that.
(22:04):
Not one.
SPEAKER_01 (22:05):
That was a scary
story when I was a boy.
SPEAKER_00 (22:10):
Oh, I know.
And he's still out thererunning.
Do you see him right there?
He's right there under the Fezhat.
And that's my cabbage patches.
They're even worse.
No.
I got tarot cards right there.
SPEAKER_01 (22:27):
No.
No.
SPEAKER_00 (22:31):
No.
No.
No.
No.
SPEAKER_01 (22:35):
No.
No.
No.
SPEAKER_00 (22:41):
Oh, say it again.
SPEAKER_01 (22:42):
I'm starting to see
why you got kicked out.
SPEAKER_00 (22:45):
Yeah, well, I'm a
life warrior, you know?
I'm a windbag.
You know, I've got a lot ofnicknames over the years.
But yeah, you know.
What are you doing?
I'm hot.
SPEAKER_01 (23:01):
Something about you
just looks so different.
SPEAKER_00 (23:04):
I know.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
It's good.
SPEAKER_01 (23:08):
it's weird
SPEAKER_00 (23:09):
i know i know no
apparently the people were
thinking i got got kicked offfor being a cross dresser for
being all weird about smurf girli don't know the
SPEAKER_01 (23:27):
rumor is you all are
never in the same room together
SPEAKER_00 (23:31):
i know oh she just
walked in the door Hey, Toonsis,
how you doing?
Yeah, this is my Toonsie.
I call her Toonsie when, youknow.
She's back from this.
No, we're in the same room.
She's just over there.
SPEAKER_01 (23:47):
I should text her.
SPEAKER_00 (23:49):
I know.
Oh, God, don't.
No, I mean, you know.
God.
Like...
You know, when I look at thegoverning body, I think that
(24:11):
it's like never going to be thesame.
Like it's seriously never goingto be the same.
SPEAKER_01 (24:16):
Why
SPEAKER_00 (24:18):
do you think that?
Oh, I'm getting hot.
Oh, I'm getting hot.
Mitch, I'm getting hot.
You've
SPEAKER_01 (24:25):
changed a little
bit, Tony.
SPEAKER_00 (24:28):
I know.
Your Uncle Tony is coming out ofme.
I have no
SPEAKER_01 (24:32):
idea.
I don't know what it is.
It's something about you.
I just can't put my hands on it.
But it's something
SPEAKER_00 (24:39):
about you.
Poor Uncle Tony.
Poor Uncle Tony.
He's going to be like, what?
We need some kind of music.
Uncle Tony brings it out of me.
SPEAKER_01 (24:50):
No more fireball for
you, Tony.
No more fireball.
SPEAKER_00 (24:54):
I like being Uncle
Tony.
UNKNOWN (25:01):
I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_00 (25:02):
No, you know, it
feels good.
Oh my God.
It'd be like, yeah.
Oh, Tony.
Tony.
I got my yoga pants on.
Just love that guy.
(25:26):
But, um, no, we got to know,like, wasn't there a rumor?
okay oh hey see we're in thesame room you just saw him and
you just saw me i'm here uncletony sit down shut up
SPEAKER_01 (25:46):
i'm talking to smurf
girl now huh
SPEAKER_00 (25:52):
i know yeah i'm back
SPEAKER_01 (25:53):
prove
SPEAKER_00 (25:55):
it
SPEAKER_01 (25:56):
if you're smart girl
you will have hair all over your
head
SPEAKER_00 (26:00):
Oh, oh, yeah.
No.
SPEAKER_01 (26:02):
Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (26:04):
No, I'm wearing a
hat all day.
No, I like wearing this hat.
And I've been wearing this hat.
And I went in and I got it.
And I was like walking around.
I was like...
Oh, I'm like, do I look, and Isaid to strangers, I said, hey,
if I wear this, will I looklike, I'm going to do an
impression of Uncle Tony.
(26:25):
Do I look like Uncle Tony?
And I'm like, Uncle Tony.
And they're like, oh, yeah, youlook like Uncle Tony.
So even strangers thought I wasdoing Uncle Tony.
SPEAKER_01 (26:34):
They had no idea.
SPEAKER_00 (26:37):
No, they couldn't
even tell.
They're like, Uncle Tony?
Even people knew who Uncle Tonywas.
Now, it's something about thehat.
It's something about the hat.
SPEAKER_01 (26:47):
It's very similar.
SPEAKER_00 (26:49):
Yeah.
There's something about him,though, Mitch.
There's something about UncleTony, for God's sake.
For God's sake.
SPEAKER_01 (26:59):
Like what?
SPEAKER_00 (27:01):
Where did he go?
Because, okay, this is thething.
Us apostates know what happenedwith Uncle Tony, right?
We all know.
Obviously, there was a problem.
and we were talking about it weall knew but for the witnesses
they're acting like it was nobig deal and they're not saying
(27:21):
like with raymond france andeverybody all the people in the
jehovah's witnesses knew why youknow like when you're in it and
it's not like the witnessesdon't know too you know what i'm
saying the witnesses know likethey they know why uncle tony
They know more than anybodyelse.
(27:43):
They saw it.
And it was them being upset withUncle Tony.
It was like the witnesses beingsuper upset and pissed off at
what Uncle Tony was doing.
And he gets kicked off.
They know more of why he gotkicked off than anyone else on
the face of the planet.
(28:05):
And, you know...
We deserve an explanation,
SPEAKER_01 (28:12):
right?
Some might not know.
Because your witnesses know.
Some of our listeners andviewers might not know.
So what?
What did he do?
SPEAKER_00 (28:24):
Good question.
And every single, I mean, Iknow.
Because, you know, like for me,you were still in the
organization when that happened.
I was not.
You know, we were doingconcerted efforts targeting him.
We got him at the liquor store.
We got him doing this.
We got him doing that.
(28:44):
I'm all online.
We had him where we wanted him,and we made, you know, when
Uncle Brent lost his mind andcommitted triple homicide, with
everything else we had caughthim doing, that was the final
straw.
Like, that while he's being ajackass up on the platform, that
people are being murdered.
(29:05):
You know what I mean?
Like, people were being murderedof online apostates being me,
that the people he was supposedto be shepherding are getting
murdered because of what's goingon in the apostate community.
And there were certain thingsthat were said about him.
Like, I had said, you know...
(29:26):
At the memorial, I dressed alittle girl up in a Smurf
costume and went to the memorialand I stood up and I said, this
is a Masonic black mass and ToniMorris is from the Philip Morris
family.
And that there was things, whatLloyd Evans was saying and doing
and who got bottle gate on tapeand things where we got him in a
(29:49):
way, us apostates as a whole insuch a way that they couldn't
help but remove them aftereverything that happened.
Like it was just this, you know,pillow gate, bottle gate, me
standing up at the memorial,various bunch of other stuff.
And also his own mouth, his ownmouth got him.
(30:11):
Like his own mouth got him.
He would say, you know, I'm froma wealthy family, don't you?
You know, it's like, oh, wellthen what wealthy family?
I'm filling in the blanks foreverybody.
That it would be the wealthyfamily he bragged about being a
part of was the Philip Morrisfamily, considering his last
name is Morris.
What other Morris family wouldthere be that's wealthy?
(30:32):
Name me one.
SPEAKER_01 (30:33):
Those who don't
know, you're talking about the
tobacco
SPEAKER_00 (30:39):
family.
Yep, which is why we're smoking.
and why then also him me sayinghe's from the philip morris
family and then his last talk isyou know uh whoops i can't even
do it lighting up a match andbeing like, oh, this is what we
do to Jehovah's enemies, outlike smoke.
(31:03):
And then he's the one that's outwhen everybody, me starting it,
saying he's from the PhilipMorris family and he's out like
smoke.
SPEAKER_01 (31:12):
Oh my goodness, wow.
SPEAKER_00 (31:14):
Because that's what
I said many, many, many times at
the memorial.
on six screens of theWatchtower, on my channel, and
he would brag about being from awealthy family.
So who else would it be?
Considering that's what theymade him do.
(31:34):
They made him do it.
I
SPEAKER_01 (31:36):
don't know.
Let me look something up realquick.
I don't know.
I might be
SPEAKER_00 (31:40):
connecting some
dots.
SPEAKER_01 (31:43):
What?
SPEAKER_00 (31:43):
I
SPEAKER_01 (31:44):
said, if you're
talking, I'm looking something
up.
I may be connecting some dotshere.
SPEAKER_00 (31:49):
Okay.
Because like if I was the onethat did it, like if it was me
instead, where it's like, youknow, I'm from a wealthy family.
I'm from a wealthy family.
You know, I'm, you know, I'mRose Morris, you know, and
saying that.
(32:09):
And then I do a match and blowit out and I get kicked off the
governing body.
You'd be like, oh, she had tohave been like if it was me or
if even it was you.
SPEAKER_02 (32:21):
What
SPEAKER_00 (32:21):
other assumption
would there be?
None.
Oh
SPEAKER_01 (32:28):
my goodness.
Are you googling
SPEAKER_02 (32:35):
it?
SPEAKER_01 (32:36):
Yeah, I'm looking up
something real quick, but you
made me think about something.
UNKNOWN (32:41):
Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_00 (32:45):
And you know he was
a drinker.
So he was a drinker and whenhe's saying he's from a wealthy
family and his last name isMorris and he's walking around
the liquor store with a hat onand a trench coat, like just
that in itself.
SPEAKER_01 (33:03):
Oh my goodness, big
SPEAKER_00 (33:06):
tobacco.
And everyone has an Uncle Tony.
You know what I mean?
Everyone has some alcoholicUncle Tony and he's slurring his
words and, you know, being allstupid.
But that's the thing that whatmakes him so lovable, like as an
apostate, those things abouthim, I love personally.
(33:28):
Like, I want him to know that,that that about him.
He used to, I mean, seriously,he used to back in the day when
I was little, because I've knownhim forever.
SPEAKER_02 (33:36):
Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_00 (33:37):
He used to have one
of these in his jacket pocket
and me and Jesse would feel it.
And he'd be like, no, that's mypacemaker.
That's my pacemaker.
You're going to give me a heartattack.
You're going to give me a heart.
No, I want to see it.
You're going to, that's mymedicine.
It's my medicine.
Yeah.
(33:58):
That's how I know this is uncleTony.
And I can, you know,
SPEAKER_01 (34:07):
it's it's crazy
SPEAKER_00 (34:08):
what'd you find
SPEAKER_01 (34:09):
what no i'm just
looking up like how it started
and everything yeah that big oldtobacco company
SPEAKER_00 (34:22):
oh
SPEAKER_01 (34:23):
okay yeah why he
made the match reference
SPEAKER_00 (34:28):
say it again
SPEAKER_01 (34:29):
you think that's why
he made the match reference oh
SPEAKER_00 (34:33):
yeah because he was
drinking and smoking and being
all uncle philip morris uncletony philip well and his
nickname is smoke like uncletony smoke you know tony smoke
morris like you can hear him atpeople oh here comes on you know
here comes tony smoke morris youknow oh he's gonna go out like
(34:55):
smoke i just like doing that man
SPEAKER_01 (34:58):
yeah
SPEAKER_00 (34:59):
doing sage at this
point
SPEAKER_01 (35:02):
No, no,
SPEAKER_00 (35:06):
no.
What?
What?
No sage?
SPEAKER_01 (35:08):
No,
SPEAKER_00 (35:11):
no.
Oh, because you get all
SPEAKER_01 (35:12):
freaky.
We don't do that type of stuff.
SPEAKER_00 (35:15):
Come on.
Let's do some tarot, Mitch.
No, no,
SPEAKER_01 (35:20):
stop.
Anyway, so...
People have been really, reallycommenting on our episodes.
They love Smurf Girl.
Someone, okay, this is what I'mthinking.
Because someone said they wantedto know more of your story.
(35:42):
I'm thinking, like, on our nextepisode, we need to, like, just,
like, drill in on it.
Like, give a little bit more ofyour story.
We touched on it.
On our first episode, we touchedon it, but I think some who
aren't aware of you, because youhave a huge following.
SPEAKER_00 (36:03):
I know, it's weird
that they wouldn't.
I'm just demonized Smurf girl,man.
Like, I'm demonized Smurf girl,the Jehovah's Witnesses.
What is there not to
SPEAKER_01 (36:13):
know?
That might scare people, though,when you put the demonized in
front of it.
SPEAKER_00 (36:19):
Well, they called me
that.
I didn't name myself Mitch.
I didn't name myself.
There's a demonized smurf girl,you know.
Her dad's a serial killer.
She's scary.
She's this.
You know, she's that.
Oh, my God.
You know, they're the ones thatsaid it.
(36:40):
Like, of my story, you know itbecause you're the ones that
said it about me.
You know?
Like, my story is what otherpeople said about me.
Right?
Yeah.
so it's like what you said aboutme is my story but it was
(37:01):
because of you know um like backin the day most people are dead
you know they of the adultsduring that time of 1982 like
how old would an adult be from1982 like Most of the adults
would have been like my mother'sage, which would have been like
(37:24):
in their 30s.
So any adults that did that tome would be like in their 70s.
You know, some of them didn'tmake it.
And so a lot of those, you know,there's some remnants of the
demonized, you know, Smurf leftbehind of the adults that did
that.
SPEAKER_01 (37:44):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (37:45):
um like it was
adults that called me names and
adults that my behavior whichyou've seen my behavior you know
my behavior flipped out like howi flip you out sometimes you
know don't do that huh what doyou mean reggie tara you know
(38:08):
like yeah come on let's do someouija you know no I would freak
them out even more being aJehovah's Witness.
And of the Witnesses that Iknew, you know, hanging around
with Uncle Tony, you know,hanging around with certain
people, I was untouchable.
Like, I even had bodyguards.
(38:31):
Like, as a teenager, I
SPEAKER_01 (38:33):
had
SPEAKER_00 (38:34):
to have bodyguards
from you great crowd Jehovah's
Witnesses.
Like, I did.
I've got pictures of havingbodyguards.
um it was the stupidest i meanwitnesses went like in the 80s
all the way up to like 1990 umjehovah's witnesses were stupid
(38:58):
around me i i've never in myentire life just stupid
especially i mean in the midwesthere in tucson i've never seen a
group of stupider people in myentire life where you know And I
don't know how to explain
SPEAKER_01 (39:14):
it.
We were afraid.
SPEAKER_00 (39:16):
Yeah, and you should
be.
Like, they should be.
SPEAKER_01 (39:19):
I heard the story.
I was a young man.
I heard the story.
Terrified.
SPEAKER_00 (39:25):
Oh, if you would
have seen it firsthand, Mitch,
you would have lost your mind.
And there wasn't anyone thatdidn't know my family that
didn't know that we ranWatchtower in multiple different
ways.
You know, walking around justlike how the body do with
bodyguards now.
Walking around with bodyguards.
(39:45):
Stupid brothers.
You know, being stupid at me.
Just being stupid.
SPEAKER_01 (39:54):
Why did you need a
bodyguard?
SPEAKER_00 (39:59):
Because brothers
would be stupid.
And well, for one, well, youknow, to keep certain people
away from me.
Like, keep, you know, I don'twant to say, but to keep certain
people, you know, certain, theway I would describe it, keeping
certain Michael Jacksons awayfrom me.
(40:20):
Just certain brothers that wouldbe like, ooh, that's demonized
Smurf girl, that's demonizedSmurf girl, like the pictures
that I have, like, of theMichael Jackson kind of brothers
that would, they'd just be allMichael Jackson.
You know, you remember that onesong, like, what's that song uh
(40:41):
where he follows that girlaround and he's following her
and he's singing to her and he'sfollowing her
SPEAKER_01 (40:47):
what um
SPEAKER_00 (40:50):
i forget it's an old
one but like when i was young
well i would walk around theassembly like this And there
would be boys, you know, justlike, oh, hey, you want to go
roller skating?
You want to do that?
You want to do that?
And so, like, you know, me,this, needed a bodyguard at the
(41:16):
assembly.
Two bodyguards.
One for each side.
You know?
And that, like, flanking.
Like, no, I don't think so.
SPEAKER_02 (41:28):
How long did that
SPEAKER_00 (41:29):
go
SPEAKER_02 (41:29):
on?
SPEAKER_00 (41:32):
it was nuts it was
nuts and and and it's been nuts
ever since like it's been nutsrecently it's been huh like yeah
it's crazy
SPEAKER_01 (41:45):
why is it nuts
recently
SPEAKER_00 (41:48):
um it's just always
you know you get crazy messages
like of what you get like okayof the messages you get you you
say about the messages you getwhat kind of messages you think
i get okay you're you you're aguy you're you so just what do
you think goes on on my end ofthings
SPEAKER_01 (42:14):
wow
SPEAKER_00 (42:15):
you know it's weird
i'm used to it it's not as bad
as it used to be when i was inthe organization but you know
it's still bad like it's stillbad i don't know
SPEAKER_01 (42:30):
so i want to know
Like what's in store for you?
Like what does Smurf Girl'sfuture look like?
SPEAKER_00 (42:40):
I don't know.
Don't know.
Anything goes.
We'll take this show to the nextlevel of like, you know, We'll
take it to the next level andwe'll see.
There's no holds barred.
After this, do you know howenvious ex-Mormons are of us
(43:05):
ex-Jehovah's Witnesses?
SPEAKER_01 (43:08):
No.
Why?
SPEAKER_00 (43:12):
Well, how do you
think they feel when they
haven't had any major changes inforever?
And we have, where it's like,oh, no, we fight like badasses.
We fight like motherfuckers.
We're going to, you know, wedon't take no for an answer.
We're going to keep going.
Do you know how they would wantto have a member of their
(43:33):
prophets be kicked off likeUncle Tony?
I
SPEAKER_01 (43:37):
bet,
SPEAKER_00 (43:38):
yeah.
Because can you imagine if itwas the Mormons that started to
be able to grow beards?
and have pants and have one oftheir prophets or Scientology
where someone on Scientology gotkicked off big time.
SPEAKER_02 (43:52):
You
SPEAKER_00 (43:54):
know, any other cult
is their goal is to be what we
are of what we've accomplished.
That's what they want too.
SPEAKER_01 (44:03):
I see what you're
saying
SPEAKER_00 (44:05):
now.
Yeah.
UNKNOWN (44:05):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (44:07):
Where, I mean, I
can't imagine if it would have
happened with the Mormons, howdisappointed I would have been.
Like, how come it couldn't havebeen us?
We're doing, you know, there's,you know, of what we're doing,
but we did because, you know,that's the kind of people we
are.
SPEAKER_01 (44:24):
Right?
Circling back to, do you think,so some are saying, and I'm
asking this because of things Isee.
Some are saying, that he reachedthat age where they suggest
people leave.
SPEAKER_00 (44:44):
No, they're all
around the same age.
That's what I think.
That's what I think.
Yeah.
Um, I think, yeah, I think he,he might even, well, other than
Mark Sanderson, he, he'sprobably right in the middle.
I wouldn't think he's, you know,he's obviously not the youngest,
(45:05):
like Mark would be the youngest,but he's not the oldest by far
at all.
And, and there's others thatlike, you know, Gary Loesch
would be, or like David Spleen,if it was age, don't think like
a witness, don't talk like awitness, you know?
(45:25):
There's one thing that the onlywitnesses will refute what us
apostates have got to say.
You know, it's like, oh no, youknow, it's, it was a bunch of
things.
It was just, it was over.
You know what I mean?
When it's like, no, the fat ladysang and it's over, Uncle Tony.
It was just over.
SPEAKER_01 (45:45):
Wow.
Yeah.
And I'm just like, like I'mrelaying comments that I hear to
you.
so that you can answer it.
You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00 (45:57):
Oh, yeah.
So what other comment?
That's
SPEAKER_01 (46:01):
mainly it.
They were saying, you know, somesay, no, he just, it was the
age.
They asked him to leave becauseof that.
Others say he's, so, oh, this isthe other.
I wanted to run this by you too.
I've seen this slant all weeklong.
They're saying that for whateverreason, they wanted to quiet him
(46:23):
up.
And so they sent him to a homethat they bought in North
Carolina.
SPEAKER_00 (46:30):
Oh, yeah.
Oh, I forgot I was going to talkabout that.
Yeah, that home is calledCelebrity Rehab with Dr.
Drew.
You remember that?
SPEAKER_02 (46:42):
Oh,
SPEAKER_00 (46:42):
yeah.
He's doing celebrity rehab.
I did non-celebrity rehab.
I did regular rehab.
because i did rehab he did rehabthis is me sober you know lovely
not really you know with thefireball but um yeah that like
(47:05):
they were gonna get him soberfor his help for for his health
and and his mental well-being umhe's needed rehab since i was
little like he's needed rehablike personally you know
carrying a little a littlefireball in his pocket Cohen at
a pacemaker, you know, he's hadproblems for a long time, but
(47:26):
that was what made him soawesome is that like, as long,
okay, this is the thing withuncle Tony, as long as he likes
you, if he likes you and youlike him and you're in good with
him and you're thick likethieves, he's the greatest guy
in the whole world.
But if he gives you the coldshoulder and cuts you off, you
(47:50):
know, cause when I was in goodwith him, You know, like, and
then I'm just doing modeling andI'm all gung ho.
Then all of a sudden he wants totreat me like I was nothing.
It's like, oh, you're going touse my image.
You're going to do this.
You're going to do that.
And when he was being UncleTony, it was fine because you
get perks for being UncleTony's.
(48:10):
You know what I mean?
But when he's going to act like,oh, I don't know.
Who are you?
I'm blind.
Who are you?
You know, I don't think so.
It's like, you know exactly whoI am, buddy.
SPEAKER_01 (48:21):
And you're saying
this is when you modeled?
SPEAKER_00 (48:24):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (48:25):
He treated you like
SPEAKER_00 (48:26):
this?
Oh, being Uncle Tony?
Oh, yeah, I was his favorite.
I was Uncle Tony's favorite.
Oh, can we use, you know, wewant to use you for a song, or
can we do this?
You know, can you do kingdommelody?
We like the way you sing.
We want to do, you know...
We want to use this experienceof you in the magazine for you
(48:48):
doing school.
Like, remember that schoolreport you did?
Oh, we're so, you know, they,they, they do that with
everybody where they will strokeyour ego to use.
And then you go up on the stageand then you get the people that
are on the stage for theassembly.
You know, those assembly stagepeople.
(49:09):
I was one of those.
Where it's like you go up andyou're holding your Bible and
you've got your experience.
And you're like, yeah, I was inschool and I was pioneering and
I did a report.
And yeah, it was one of thosestupid, annoying girls on the
platform.
You know, one of them bitches onthe platform that's like, oh,
(49:32):
isn't she a goody goody?
Isn't she just perfect?
Well, aren't you?
Yeah, I am.
UNKNOWN (49:40):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (49:41):
I was too perfect.
I know.
No, I was.
I was totally like...
I was just the most perfectJehovah's Witness girl on the
face of the planet and then gotmarried off at 16.
And I used to say, you know why?
(50:02):
Because I was too perfect.
It sounds arrogant, but it'slike they're just so...
Well, you can never be tooperfect either.
Like, for me personally, withUncle Tony and Orton Hanson, I
could not be perfect enough.
(50:25):
Like, of all the pictures thatI've shown, just, you know, now
that I look at it, it's like,God, those are so cute.
Just beautiful photographs of myteenage years.
And those beautiful photographs,I was not perfect enough to for
Arden Hansen and Uncle Tony.
(50:46):
So this is what it looks like,Uncle Tony, when you don't think
I'm perfect enough for you.
You know, now you're not perfectenough.
You know, he's far from perfect.
But I was not perfect enough,and then I became collateral
damage because I was such atroublemaker.
You know, I was the queen of,you know, sneaking around.
(51:08):
Why
SPEAKER_01 (51:09):
did you become a
troublemaker?
SPEAKER_00 (51:13):
Because I knew all
the bigwigs and knew what
hypocrites they were.
And I would try and wake peopleup.
I would try and wake you up.
Con was by my behavior.
By my brat behavior was my wayof trying to wake people up.
And because people would lookand say, oh, look at that little
girl.
She's from an elite Jehovah'sWitness family.
(51:34):
Look at her stepdad's doing thehelp desk.
Her stepdad's doing the sound atthe assembly.
Why is she acting like such abrat?
And I'd be like, because I'mtrying to wake you up, man.
Like, trying to wake you up.
So I'd just be able to enjoy apiece of work.
SPEAKER_01 (51:53):
You have to watch
those sound guys at the
assembly.
SPEAKER_00 (51:57):
Yeah.
Oh.
SPEAKER_01 (51:58):
I was
SPEAKER_00 (51:58):
a sound guy.
I was a sound guy.
Oh, yeah, you were a sound
SPEAKER_01 (52:02):
guy.
What am I saying?
What are you trying to say aboutme?
SPEAKER_00 (52:06):
That you vast
apostate liar is mentally
diseased apostate, demonizedapostate Mitch.
SPEAKER_02 (52:18):
I'm
SPEAKER_00 (52:19):
demonized apostate.
I don't mind admitting it.
Demonized.
I love being demonized.
Stop, stop, stop.
No, because they, oh, oh, Idon't got one.
Oh, guess what, Mitch?
They took my ring away when theykicked me off the body.
(52:41):
They
SPEAKER_01 (52:44):
took
SPEAKER_00 (52:44):
it away.
I love, I miss it.
Yeah, they took my ring away.
They took my ring.
They said, can't hand it over.
Bragger.
God, bragger.
SPEAKER_01 (52:59):
That picture you
posted of us.
SPEAKER_00 (53:05):
yes
SPEAKER_01 (53:05):
when i was young and
had hair
SPEAKER_00 (53:08):
say it again
SPEAKER_01 (53:09):
i said remember that
picture you posted of us earlier
this week when i was young andhad hair i was flashing yeah
SPEAKER_00 (53:17):
i love it i know and
you had a yeah that was the same
ring you had in that
SPEAKER_01 (53:23):
picture
SPEAKER_00 (53:24):
And you're the one
that's, yeah, like there are
brothers that got those big, andit really, it's a status symbol
of just being like a made man inthe mafia, like being a
Watchtower mafia made man.
I got my beamer, I'm Big Mitchwith my big ring.
SPEAKER_01 (53:43):
I
SPEAKER_00 (53:43):
told people,
SPEAKER_01 (53:45):
I told people, like
on one of my videos that I made,
when I'm trying to tell peoplelike how it really is an
organization, that's what ilikened it to i told him when
you become a servant and anelder it's like you're a made
man it's hard to get knockeddown
SPEAKER_00 (54:03):
oh yeah
SPEAKER_01 (54:04):
like
SPEAKER_00 (54:05):
god i can't believe
yeah
SPEAKER_01 (54:07):
i would have
accusations against me from
idiots but the elders wouldn'twant to do anything to me like
yeah they would be in essencethey would make up stories to
defend me yeah i tried to tellpeople that's just how it is
it's very hard to get knockeddown yeah
SPEAKER_00 (54:29):
yeah once you get
made and you get friends on that
elder body they will back you upthere and it is it's just like
the mafia like i was trying toexplain it to like other people
SPEAKER_01 (54:43):
yeah
SPEAKER_00 (54:44):
and and i liken it
to the mafia all the time oh
SPEAKER_01 (54:47):
yeah
SPEAKER_00 (54:48):
And also with the
mafia, when they have a
situation, it's like, oh, don'tworry.
Like, oh, for an example,Jehovah will take care of it.
Like, imagine when they saythat.
Oh, don't worry, you know what?
Oh, is there any secondwitnesses?
(55:08):
Like, okay, I'm going to saythis in a real gangster way.
If you come to me and you saythis, this, and this just
happened, whatever it is, I'd belike, well, were there any
second witnesses to it, Mitch?
No, no, no, there weren't.
Okay, well, you know what?
(55:31):
I'll have Jehovah take care ofit, okay?
You know?
Don't call the cops, though.
I'll have Jehovah take care ofit.
Because there ain't no secondwitnesses, right?
But who did it?
And if I knew, if I was like aJohn Gotti, I would go take care
of it.
I'd have Jehovah take care ofit, you know, of whoever Jehovah
(55:55):
would be and be like, yeah, youknow, there's this guy, he's
XYZ, you know, kids, whatever itwould be.
Why don't you go, you know, whydon't Jehovah go teach him a
lesson on, you know, touching onkids?
What would that mean?
If I were to say, I'll have, oh,you know, the guy's touching on
some kids, I'll have to go haveJehovah take care of it.
(56:17):
You know, don't even bothercalling the cops.
You know, it'll be done bymorning.
You know, like that's how youcould take that.
That if there's no way, becauseI mean, look at what happened
with Uncle Brent and UncleClyde.
You know, they told me Jehovahwas going to take care of that
situation.
And that is what happened.
(56:40):
So what else am I supposed tothink, right?
Like, what am I supposed tothink?
Knowing it's like, oh, well,what?
Is that Jehovah's way of takingcare of things that the cops
didn't take care of it, soJehovah did?
It's like, okay.
You know?
And so, you know, it's a way toput those, you know, those kinds
(57:03):
of pedos on notice that when thebrothers do say that in some
instances, a lot...
that when Jehovah takes care ofit, it doesn't end up with a
jail cell.
Well, it sometimes does, butthat there's a lot of collateral
damage when Jehovah takes careof it.
Jehovah takes care of it in amore messy kind of a way.
(57:29):
And we see the mess.
We see it in the headlines allthe time.
Brother goes to the kingdom halland takes his wife.
You know, this thing, thatthing.
Lauren Stewart, Christian Longo,Uncle Brent, Uncle Clyde.
You know, all these things.
Countless.
I don't think they want Jehovahto take care of it.
(57:50):
But in my opinion, when I seeJehovah taking care of a
situation like that, I'm gettingto the point where I kind of
appreciate it at this point.
Where it's like, I stand up andI'm like, yay! Look at how
Jehovah took care of that.
You know, thank you, Jehovah.
And I sing a little song forthem.
SPEAKER_01 (58:11):
Because something
bad might happen to different
people.
That's what you mean by that.
SPEAKER_00 (58:16):
Oh, yeah.
They get taken care of one wayor another.
Like Jehovah handled Uncle Tony.
You know, did they call the copson Uncle Tony?
No, they took care of him oneway or another.
you know and he's blowing outhis own match and it's this and
it's that like is he sure that'sthe way he will the route he
(58:39):
wants to take you know i meanthat's kind of a deep scary
situation you know for forsomebody to talk about but it's
true like i've seen it with myown eyes so it's like
SPEAKER_01 (58:51):
i don't i don't know
how uh ready people would be to
like hear that and accept it.
You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00 (59:02):
Yeah.
Well, what's the otheralternative?
You know what I mean?
Because in every situation whenthat's going on, does it ever
end well?
Like it never does.
It always ends up in somethinghorrifying.
(59:23):
When Jehovah handles it.
Like when the court, like, youknow, but when Jehovah handles
it, when Jehovah handles thesituation, brothers and sisters,
does it ever end without someonegoing Uncle Brent on somebody
else?
No, it doesn't.
When Jehovah handles it, becauseask yourself, when Jehovah
(59:45):
handles it, does it ever end upwhere it's not on the table of a
homicide detective?
It doesn't.
It always does.
It always ends up in a filewhere then the whole family is
obliterated and there's usuallyno witnesses left to talk about
(01:00:08):
it.
And the whole family then getsUncle Brented is how it always
ends up.
SPEAKER_01 (01:00:18):
Why does it only
happen like that with some?
and not with all the victims.
SPEAKER_00 (01:00:29):
Well, it hasn't
happened yet.
You know what I mean?
You can't have it happen all atonce.
But, you know, God, Mitch.
You know?
SPEAKER_01 (01:00:44):
I'm asking the
questions that the viewers are
going to ask.
That's what I'm doing.
SPEAKER_00 (01:00:48):
Yeah, well, I know
for a fact that the way that
it's playing out...
is playing out in a certainorder where it's like you know
christian longo linked to laurenstewart lauren stewart linked to
me uncle brent linked to me youknow and then linked to uncle
(01:01:09):
clyde linked to this one there'sa lot you know jeffrey epstein
links there's links to each oneof them the of what's happening
in the news of these thingsthey're not random Where it's
like, oh, I remember thatbrother.
Oh, he's linked to LaurenStewart.
Or that brother's linked toChristian Longo.
(01:01:29):
That brother's linked to thisother person.
It's all links of a chain.
And as each link, you know,because this is how it was
described.
As each link starts to break,then another one will snap.
Like, they'll see...
you know, there's several ones,oh God, oh God, I know all about
(01:01:51):
Clyde Hanson.
You know, I know all, oh God, ohGod.
And then they start having elderbodies.
And when they start havingjudicials and then somebody will
snap, somebody will lose it.
And there's another link to thechain and then something else,
somewhere else, another link toa chain.
Then there's uncle Tony, anotherlink to a chain, you know, and I
(01:02:15):
know the chain.
It's hanging around my neck.
And I'm like, oh, there'sanother one.
You know, until the necklace isjust so tight around all their
necks that they're not going tobe able to breathe.
You know, where all you got todo, like if I'm working on
getting my judicial recordsubpoenaed.
(01:02:37):
And if my judicial, if DemonizedSmurf Girl's judicial records
were out.
you know i've got the picturestoo where it's like oh yeah this
goes with this this goes withthat my judicial file it might
as well be the epstein file thisis what it might as well be you
(01:02:58):
know what i mean a
SPEAKER_01 (01:03:01):
lot of you have a
lot of a lot of names on your
judicial file huh
SPEAKER_00 (01:03:06):
oh what do you yeah
i mean what would you assume you
know what i'm saying well
SPEAKER_01 (01:03:14):
you know I don't say
everything that you and I talk
about.
I let you say what you'recomfortable saying.
You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00 (01:03:23):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (01:03:24):
Yeah.
I'm asking questions that I knowI've seen and maybe some of our
listeners may be asking.
So that's why I'm asking certainquestions.
SPEAKER_00 (01:03:36):
Well, of all the
people, of all the thousands, if
not millions, not even just thethousands online...
all the answers to what reallyhappened with the demonized
smurf and everything andafterwards is all in my file you
know of like of when whensomebody makes a video and says
(01:03:59):
what really happened with thatdemonized smurf oh it's in my
file you know it's in my mymom's file Arden Hansen's file.
It's in Uncle Tony's file.
It's in Uncle Stephen's file.
It's in all their files, youknow, of everyone that was there
(01:04:19):
at
SPEAKER_02 (01:04:19):
that
SPEAKER_00 (01:04:21):
Kingdom Hall that
day.
The memorial, April 8th, 1982.
Everyone that was at thememorial at our Kingdom Hall in
Ortonville, Minnesota, which wasa small Kingdom Hall, but It's
in every single one of theirfiles.
(01:04:42):
And at this point, and inBreckenridge, Minnesota.
And at this point, some reallyhorrible things of the people in
those congregations that wereinvolved with that.
There has, you know, Uncle Clydewas there.
Uncle Brent was there.
Uncle Tony was there.
You know, I was there.
(01:05:02):
My mom was there.
Of all these people, it's like,and what happened with those
individuals that were there?
Anything good?
Most of them we can't even askbecause they're dead and in
jail.
My Uncle Morris Hanson wasthere.
He's doing life too.
You
SPEAKER_02 (01:05:23):
know?
SPEAKER_00 (01:05:25):
My grandma's dead.
She can't say anything.
Junkyard grandma.
Um...
You know, and so that's just aword of warning to anybody else
that was there for thatOrtonville Memorial.
It's in your file.
Wash our nose.
(01:05:45):
Do I care?
No, because I'm the most visibleone.
You know, and they're all scaredof me.
Can you imagine those peoplethat were there?
I was scared of her.
You know, why?
Time to play hardball.
It really is.
(01:06:05):
It's not something that's aminimal big deal.
It was the biggest scandal toever happen.
What's the biggest scandal toever happen?
SPEAKER_01 (01:06:18):
It
SPEAKER_00 (01:06:18):
is an Uncle Tony,
which it's related.
For
SPEAKER_01 (01:06:22):
me, that's it.
SPEAKER_00 (01:06:24):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (01:06:24):
That damn Smurf
story.
SPEAKER_00 (01:06:27):
And it's related to
everything else.
Everything else is just...
me getting older, you know, andvarious family members of, like,
oh, yeah, then Uncle Clyde growsup, and then he's a stoop, you
know, and then me, and thenUncle Tony.
Then Uncle Tony gets made on thegoverning body, and then look at
what happens to him, you know?
(01:06:50):
Like, it's just a good, it's afamily saga.
That's what we used to call it,like, you know, Smurf Girl's
family saga.
It's like, oh, no, you know?
SPEAKER_01 (01:07:00):
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_00 (01:07:01):
It's really become
something.
SPEAKER_01 (01:07:03):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (01:07:06):
It was so much more
than what people realize.
SPEAKER_01 (01:07:08):
After all these
years, it's still being talked
about.
SPEAKER_00 (01:07:15):
I know.
I thought people
SPEAKER_01 (01:07:16):
forgot.
And people are still talkingabout it.
SPEAKER_00 (01:07:21):
I know.
What's that been?
43 years.
No, wait.
41.
No, wait.
SPEAKER_01 (01:07:31):
Yeah, I think you're
right, 43, 44, something
SPEAKER_00 (01:07:36):
like that.
82.
Yeah.
43 years.
I was eight.
Like, yeah, that was, God, thatwas awful.
(01:07:56):
You know?
actually
SPEAKER_01 (01:08:02):
it was an assembly
part i was still living in
chicago at the time you know youknow one of the talks at the
assembly talked about it andyeah he was like if you have one
of those you need to throw itaway tonight and uh yeah like we
didn't have any but i was stillterrified as
SPEAKER_00 (01:08:26):
well was i on the
stage for it Was there a little
girl on the stage for it?
SPEAKER_01 (01:08:31):
No, this was in
Chicago.
It was just a brother giving atalk.
SPEAKER_00 (01:08:34):
Okay.
SPEAKER_01 (01:08:35):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (01:08:35):
Because they did
take me to all the bowl
assemblies, you know, the CottonBowl, the Coliseum, the Rose
Bowl, going Rose Bundy Bowl,Rose Bowl Bundy hunting.
That's what I named it after theRose Bowl assembly.
Going Rose Bowl Bundy hunting.
That's what he called it.
(01:08:58):
Isn't that nuts?
You know, and taking all thedifferent bowl assemblies and
then giving the parts.
You know, scaring the crap outof you guys.
SPEAKER_01 (01:09:10):
Oh my goodness.
SPEAKER_00 (01:09:13):
Well, they needed to
scare people in after they were
leaving like crazy after 75.
Like, and it did.
It feared them in.
Where they were like, oh, if weleave the organization, we don't
want to leave demonized.
And it's like, I mean,seriously, you guys were so
demonized it wasn't funny.
Just, I've never, like, seen thedemonized reaction of Jehovah's
(01:09:38):
Witnesses back then was over thetop.
It was over the top.
I mean, all of a sudden theadults started beating their
kids with wooden spoons, thatkind of demonization of just
mothers just dragging, andfathers dragging their kids down
(01:09:58):
the aisle, dislocating theirshoulders, you know, and hands
over the mouth.
Mouth popping wedding rings ofchewing on paper towels with a
bloody mouth.
I mean, do you know how littleboys like you, you remember
sucking on a paper towel duringthe meeting?
SPEAKER_01 (01:10:22):
My mom would swap me
with the truth book real quick.
SPEAKER_00 (01:10:27):
Yeah?
SPEAKER_01 (01:10:28):
People would hear a
sound in the hall, but they
didn't know where it came from.
SPEAKER_00 (01:10:32):
God.
SPEAKER_01 (01:10:33):
She was fast.
SPEAKER_00 (01:10:35):
No, the little boys
mainly would be sucking on a
paper towel because they'd gettheir mouth popped.
SPEAKER_01 (01:10:42):
Oh, my goodness.
SPEAKER_00 (01:10:43):
You know, getting
bloody in the inside of your
mouth.
And I need a paper towel andthen sucking on a paper towel.
The wooden spooning and knowingthat that was why.
That was intense.
That was really intense.
(01:11:04):
Having to watch and knowing whyall the parents were all of a
sudden throwing out all theirkids' toys and...
You know, I need to, you know,cool, because you know what?
You know why Witness kids had tothrow out all their toys all the
time was because the parentsblamed the kids' bad behavior
(01:11:25):
and tantrums at the meeting andstuff on their toys.
Like, oh, you know, maybe theirtoys are making them throw a
tantrum at the meeting.
And it's like maybe becauseyou're a bad parent is why, you
know.
maybe because you're in a psychocult you know i mean the bloody
(01:11:47):
mouse that i saw you rememberback in the 80s um seeing little
kids with the the black babyteeth you remember seeing you
know sometimes kids that had theblack baby teeth
SPEAKER_01 (01:12:01):
like like they were
rotten
SPEAKER_00 (01:12:04):
yeah like just black
baby teeth there was after 1982
there were a lot of little boysin the organization that had
little black baby or brownlittle brown or black baby teeth
and i had when i got older i wasat the dentist when i had my own
(01:12:26):
kid and um she had bumped hertooth And he goes, it might turn
brown or it might, you know,because when you bump your baby
teeth real bad, that's whathappens.
And I'm like, oh, that's why,yeah, it's trauma of when you
have brown or black baby teethis because your baby teeth get
(01:12:48):
knocked and traumatized.
And it turns out they diebecause of that.
you know and there were a lotfrom you know 82 to you know
1990 a lot of those little kidshad black and brown baby teeth
(01:13:09):
and it's because they're gettingpopped in the mouth too much
SPEAKER_01 (01:13:14):
that's great
SPEAKER_00 (01:13:18):
I don't know how
much it's happening now, but in
the 80s, it happened a lot.
SPEAKER_01 (01:13:23):
Yeah, I don't think
it happens now.
It's a lot of parents don'tbelieve in spanking kids.
SPEAKER_00 (01:13:29):
Yeah, I firmly
believe that's why, you know,
child abuse is being made morepublic.
And when kids started to callthe cops on their own parents
was Jehovah's Witness kidscalling the cops on their own
parents.
You could be arrested forspanking me this bad at the
meeting.
And kids were calling the copson their own parents.
(01:13:51):
And I think a lot of those kidsthat did that were witness kids.
A lot of them.
Because I know I did.
And I got a lot of other kids.
You should call the cops on yourparents if they're doing that.
That a lot of that stemmed fromchild abuse happening in the
witnesses is kids calling thecops on their own parents.
(01:14:14):
On their witness parents.
UNKNOWN (01:14:15):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (01:14:16):
I don't think that
happened too much in the black
community.
SPEAKER_00 (01:14:20):
Yeah, I don't know.
SPEAKER_01 (01:14:22):
Black kids didn't
call the cops.
SPEAKER_00 (01:14:28):
No.
SPEAKER_01 (01:14:28):
No, not on their
fans.
SPEAKER_00 (01:14:30):
Us white Jehovah's
Witness kids did though.
SPEAKER_01 (01:14:35):
I can see that.
No, we would have got our asskicked in front of the police.
SPEAKER_00 (01:14:41):
Yeah.
No, you know, I do remember, youknow, I had a black boyfriend,
like one of my first boyfriends.
What?
Yeah, what?
Can you tell me that?
Oh, yeah.
No, I'm friends with him onFacebook, actually.
I talk to him quite often.
But he said the same thing.
(01:15:05):
He goes on, you know, he saidthe same thing.
that he goes, no, this is justnormal.
I said, well, not for me.
It's not normal.
That's not normal.
And so I would get all upset.
And he'd just be like, oh, no,it's normal.
I'm like, that's not normal.
He goes, yeah, it is.
And I'm like, no, it's not.
SPEAKER_01 (01:15:24):
That's why I'm
laughing.
The whole while you've beentalking, I'm going to laugh.
I'm like, really?
I'm just kicking at the circuit
SPEAKER_00 (01:15:33):
assembly.
Yeah.
Maybe that's why Michael Jacksontalked like a woman.
is because his mom kept beatinghim between the legs with a
wooden spoon.
That's what he
SPEAKER_01 (01:15:46):
said.
That's a soft-spoken man, that'sall.
SPEAKER_00 (01:15:51):
Am I too outspoken?
SPEAKER_01 (01:15:52):
No, I said Michael
Jackson was a soft-spoken man,
that's all.
SPEAKER_00 (01:15:59):
Oh, soft-spoken man,
effeminate, sallow,
sanctimonious, like Jesus,according to Watchtower.
SPEAKER_01 (01:16:08):
So will you...
We talked about this the otherday.
Are you still going to KingdomHalls?
SPEAKER_00 (01:16:20):
Do I what?
SPEAKER_01 (01:16:22):
Are you still going
to Kingdom Halls to say your
message?
SPEAKER_00 (01:16:28):
Oh, sometimes.
Well, when I went to the KingdomHall and then I went to the
assembly...
And then I had to spend threeand a half weeks in a lunatic
asylum.
So, no, I don't want
SPEAKER_01 (01:16:44):
to go anymore.
What, they called on you orsomething when you showed up at
the assembly?
SPEAKER_00 (01:16:50):
Yeah.
No, I called, and the cops don'tget it.
The cops still don't getapostasy, which is really
upsetting.
So I do want to say to otherapostates, at this point, be
careful.
Because what we deal with, theauthorities don't have a clue.
(01:17:11):
And when they see it, like whatwe're talking about, you get
what I'm saying.
You know, when I talk about, oh,Uncle Tony Morris and this and
this, you know, like when peoplesay, well, Tony Morris got
kicked off the governing bodyand beards and pants.
And, you know, when you saybeards and pants and Uncle Tony
(01:17:33):
Morris and...
When you start talkingWatchtower to the cops, that
sounds crazy to them.
Yeah.
Of what we're going through inthe apostate community.
The police think that that's theravings of a lunatic.
And it's like, well, no, we allknow about Uncle Tony and it's
(01:17:55):
this and it's that.
Yeah.
Talking about even like StephenLett or talking about a
demonized Smurf running down theaisle at Kingdom Hall.
Do you know what that soundslike to a police officer?
SPEAKER_01 (01:18:07):
I know what it
sounded like to me.
SPEAKER_00 (01:18:10):
Yeah, it sounds like
lunatic.
SPEAKER_01 (01:18:12):
And
SPEAKER_00 (01:18:13):
then I say to them,
well, you don't understand.
I'm Smurf Girl.
I'm XJW Smurf Girl.
And, you know, Toni Morris gotkicked off the governing body
and it's beards in its pants.
And, you know, Mark Sandersongrew a beard.
And they're thinking I'm crazy.
And then I realized, you know,it does sound really crazy.
And I admit it.
So I took it like a woman.
(01:18:35):
which is more than taking it asa Jehovah's Witness man.
And I sat in that hospital forthree and a half weeks.
And I'm like, no, all you got.
And I sat there.
I said, I'm not taking any meds.
All you got to do, doctor, isGoogle me.
There's Google me.
Until finally we were at astandoff.
(01:18:58):
And I'm like, you know, Dr.
Nima.
I said, you got a computersitting right there.
I was sitting at his desk.
And I'm like, Google me.
And he goes, because he goes,you still, you know, like you
still think, you know, thatyou're like on a show.
Like, and I'm like, I doYouTube.
(01:19:20):
You still think you have a show?
Yeah, I got a show.
This goes to Dr.
Nima, by the way.
You, Dr.
Nima.
You still think you got a showand you document like a
documentary for, yeah.
It's called XJW Network, youknow, wherever it is, you know,
like, you know, and it's calledXJW Smurf Girl.
(01:19:42):
And so I said, doctor, and he'dbeen three weeks.
I was court ordered.
I said, Google me, please.
Well, you got the internet?
Okay, fine.
So he goes, what is it?
I'm like, XJW Smurf Girl.
He Googles it.
And I said, see, right there.
That's me.
This right here, that's me.
(01:20:04):
Because I'm like, do you notknow what a Jehovah's Witness
is?
No, I know what a Jehovah'sWitness is.
And, you know, are you stillreally upset of your depression
about this, you know, beards andpants?
Like, he didn't even get it.
I'm like, there's thousands ofpeople online that get it.
(01:20:26):
You know?
Yeah, beards and pants and TonyMorris.
And, you know, but two...
psychiatrist it sounds crazy toa police officer it sounds crazy
so to apostates just know thatwhen we're ranting and raving
about beards and pants and ToniMorris that to the cops that
(01:20:48):
sometimes sounds lunatic yeahyeah and so we need to keep it
to ourself at this point Andthen maybe with protests also
don't do a protest by yourself.
Like words of warning, don't goto the assembly by yourself.
(01:21:08):
Like it's not safe.
These witnesses.
Okay.
You know, I just kind of bring,I'm just kind of thinking about
this right now.
Do not go to the assembly byyourself.
Um, don't go to the kingdom halland crash it by yourself.
because they have done things atthis point that when an apostate
(01:21:30):
says it to a police officer, thepolice officer looks at the
apostate like, we are crazy.
Like, why are you so upset aboutbeards?
Why are you so upset aboutpants?
Who's this Toni Morrischaracter?
Why are you so, you know, andthen also then, you know, the
(01:21:51):
pedophilia, the trafficking, umtony morris beards pants blah
blah blah of all the things wetalk about in the community on a
regular basis or demonize smurfthey're gonna look they look at
us like we are raving lunaticsand that's what the jehovah's
(01:22:12):
witnesses has done to us yeahand not one of the things that
i'm bringing up is not 100 trueso be careful to anyone of the
Kingdom Hall goers or Kirkcrashers, be careful what you
say to a police officer becauseyou could end up, like me, being
(01:22:37):
mistaken for a crazy personbecause the witness is in a
crazy situation right now.
SPEAKER_01 (01:22:43):
But because of what
you just said, do you think it's
even wise to go crash a meeting?
SPEAKER_00 (01:22:50):
No.
Not at all.
Unless you can crash it and getout of there within a few
minutes.
Yeah.
But I would suggest not.
Or if you do, go with at least10 other people.
Or like 10 people total.
(01:23:10):
So that you have numbers on yourside.
And to not get into all thebeards, pants...
tony morris details to the copskeep it as simple as possible
because the actual details areso insane to a police officer
they don't get it
SPEAKER_02 (01:23:32):
you know they they
don't
SPEAKER_00 (01:23:33):
understand they
don't understand the doctrine
changes they don't understandhaving a governing body member
kicked off they don't understandum like to go even about
overlapping generation to apolice officer.
SPEAKER_01 (01:23:50):
They're
SPEAKER_00 (01:23:50):
going to think
you're nuts.
SPEAKER_01 (01:23:52):
Yeah.
So you, you would recommend justkeeping, keeping the fight
online.
SPEAKER_00 (01:24:00):
Yes.
And at this point, the ones thatare remaining are so few and
they're seriously, I've seenthem with my own eyes and not a
single one is worth it.
Worth it anyway.
SPEAKER_01 (01:24:13):
Yeah.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (01:24:14):
Like, they're so
worthless.
Like, I hate to say it, but,like, I think, Mitch, you were
the last remaining decent personto leave.
And now that you're gone ninemonths ago, the last remaining
people are not worth our effort.
And it's time.
That's why I'm a differentperson.
It's like, no, now it's time forclosure.
(01:24:35):
The last remaining decentindividual is gone.
And all the other ones are theworthless pedohiders that...
SPEAKER_01 (01:24:48):
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
SPEAKER_00 (01:24:52):
But that's your
anointing, Mitch.
You're not anointed without yourring on.
Oh.
That's what makes you anointed.
SPEAKER_01 (01:25:02):
Oh.
SPEAKER_00 (01:25:04):
God, I can't see
without my Uncle Tony glasses.
SPEAKER_01 (01:25:08):
Love it.
SPEAKER_00 (01:25:09):
Oh, see, I'm Uncle
Tony again.
Uh-oh.
SPEAKER_01 (01:25:12):
You better cover
those
SPEAKER_00 (01:25:15):
up.
He's a cross-dresser.
He's a cross-dresser.
That was a ring that you tookoff, right?
SPEAKER_01 (01:25:22):
Yeah, I took my ring
off.
You said I was the last decentone.
I was like, oh.
SPEAKER_00 (01:25:28):
I know.
You have now been removed fromthe governing body.
Oh.
No.
You are now an official
SPEAKER_01 (01:25:40):
apostate.
This is the hand I held theBible with, so the ring just
flashed the audience all thetime.
SPEAKER_00 (01:25:47):
It's not the hand
that held the songbook, is it?
The back of the songbook guy.
You're not the back of the song,Mitch, the back of the songbook
guy.
No.
SPEAKER_01 (01:25:57):
They would have
needed a large print.
SPEAKER_00 (01:26:04):
Once you go black of
the songbook, you can't go back.
That's a black of the songbook.
This is Watch Star After Darktimes, too.
It
SPEAKER_01 (01:26:22):
wasn't me.
SPEAKER_00 (01:26:24):
I don't know.
Let's see.
Yeah, am I talking to the realback of the songbook guy?
It's Mitch, the back of thesongbook guy.
SPEAKER_02 (01:26:33):
I
SPEAKER_00 (01:26:35):
would reckon, let me
see your wrist, Mitch.
Let me see your wrist.
Let me see your wrist.
Does it match the back of thesongbook?
SPEAKER_01 (01:26:43):
No, mine is darker.
SPEAKER_00 (01:26:45):
Let me see.
SPEAKER_01 (01:26:45):
It's
SPEAKER_00 (01:26:46):
totally you.
Mine is darker.
No, it's Cecil.
It's Cecil, the back of thesongbook guy.
But Mitch, you come in second.
Yes, there he comes.
we found them ladies andgentlemen no that wrist is too
thick that's a thick wrist ohwait i got i'll hold
SPEAKER_01 (01:27:11):
something
SPEAKER_00 (01:27:17):
okay everybody would
have that
SPEAKER_01 (01:27:23):
have a large
SPEAKER_00 (01:27:25):
i got something We
thank you, Jill.
SPEAKER_01 (01:27:32):
That's not me.
SPEAKER_00 (01:27:33):
Stop gawking at me,
Mitch.
SPEAKER_01 (01:27:35):
That's
SPEAKER_00 (01:27:35):
not me.
Stop gawking at me with yourweirdo song book rest.
SPEAKER_01 (01:27:38):
That's not me.
If it was me, I would have toldthem I want to be the only one
in the picture.
SPEAKER_00 (01:27:50):
Yeah.
Oh, I can probably crop you out.
Oh.
Let's really mess with thesongbook.
Oh, wait, my phone.
SPEAKER_01 (01:27:59):
It wasn't me.
It wasn't
SPEAKER_00 (01:28:01):
you.
It wasn't?
No.
Yee-hoo protests too much.
I think Mitch was the back ofthe songbook guy.
I think you're the back of thesongbook guy.
You're so guilty.
(01:28:22):
No, that would just be thefunniest thing ever.
God.
Yeah, see, you can do it sogood.
No, Cecil does it better.
Cecil does it.
I got the fan that held thesongbook.
It's totally him.
Is it you?
It's totally you.
(01:28:43):
It is totally you.
Because you know.
That
SPEAKER_01 (01:28:48):
guy wasn't wearing
glasses.
He wasn't wearing glasses on thesongbook.
SPEAKER_00 (01:28:52):
Yeah, well, it's
totally you.
The back of the songbook, guys.
Mitch, you heard it here first,everybody.
From Uncle Tony.
We just, ow.
And you know what?
Because I'm dressed like adetective.
I'm a detective.
(01:29:13):
Your Honor, I changed the plea,Mitch's plea, to guilty as
charged.
SPEAKER_01 (01:29:21):
I would have told
you that.
SPEAKER_00 (01:29:22):
Yeah, I
SPEAKER_01 (01:29:28):
know
SPEAKER_00 (01:29:35):
Big Mitch.
Big Mitch and his BMW going toSkate Country.
I've known Mitch for a longtime.
SPEAKER_01 (01:29:42):
Mitch.
You?
Mitch?
SPEAKER_00 (01:29:51):
Your disfellowship
name?
SPEAKER_01 (01:29:53):
Big Mitch is my
disfellowship name.
SPEAKER_00 (01:29:55):
Yeah, you were Big
Mitch at Skate Country.
Sexy Big Mitch in his BMW.
No, you don't think I didn'thear about you?
Little chocolate thunder from,yeah, you know?
Come on.
You were a little chocolaterabbit.
I could crack you open like anegg.
SPEAKER_02 (01:30:19):
See,
SPEAKER_00 (01:30:21):
you even admitted,
no, I'm the back of the songbook
guy.
I knew it.
I knew it.
It's okay.
SPEAKER_01 (01:30:27):
We forgive you.
That wrist was thin.
SPEAKER_00 (01:30:31):
No, no, it is Cecil.
But trust me, it's Cecil.
It was Cecil Perkins.
I think it's Cecil Perkins.
But yeah, Cecil, the back of thepenis, it's penis and Cecil, the
back of the songbook guy.
SPEAKER_01 (01:30:43):
That was a small
wrist.
That's not me.
SPEAKER_00 (01:30:46):
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, if it was Mitch, you'dknow it.
If it was you, we'd know it.
It'd be like, oh, man.
Do you see the size of thatguy's wrists?
Huge.
Terrible.
SPEAKER_02 (01:31:04):
This has
SPEAKER_00 (01:31:05):
been fun.
It's been an hour and a half, sohow long are we going to take
this for?
SPEAKER_01 (01:31:16):
We should wrap it up
now.
Oh, my God.
Before we get kicked off theair.
SPEAKER_00 (01:31:22):
I know.
It's been fun.
I enjoyed being Uncle Tony.
Thank you.
I
SPEAKER_01 (01:31:29):
enjoyed talking with
Uncle Tony.
I miss Uncle Tony.
SPEAKER_00 (01:31:34):
I know.
I'm sorry.
God,
SPEAKER_01 (01:31:36):
man.
SPEAKER_00 (01:31:37):
I got to say goodbye
to people.
I'm really sorry abouteverything.
SPEAKER_01 (01:31:42):
I posted a picture
of him today on my TikTok and
Instagram in honor of him.
SPEAKER_00 (01:31:48):
Oh, yeah?
SPEAKER_01 (01:31:49):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (01:31:50):
Good.
Poor Uncle Tony.
I know when he does his hat likethis, he's always got to do the
front and the back.
Uncle Tony.
God.
And he's got an outside.
This is his inside hat, by theway.
This is his inside
SPEAKER_01 (01:32:05):
hat.
Oh, wow.
SPEAKER_00 (01:32:08):
He's got an outside
hat.
I'll wear the outside hat.
I got the outside hat too.
Do you like my tie?
Look at how wide it is.
Look at how wide.
Wide.
SPEAKER_01 (01:32:18):
Crazy.
SPEAKER_00 (01:32:19):
I know.
SPEAKER_01 (01:32:20):
As thick as my
wrist.
SPEAKER_00 (01:32:23):
Yeah.
It's as wide as your, yeah, aswide as your forehead.
SPEAKER_01 (01:32:28):
Wow.
Wow.
Wait, I forgot to show this.
Anything you want to say?
Anything you want to say to wrapup?
SPEAKER_00 (01:32:41):
No, it's just Uncle
Tony.
If you do talk to somebody, Iwill never forgive you.
If you talk to Lloyd Evansfirst, I will seriously never
forgive you.
And hopefully he'll talk to us.
i i say that within the nextyear it took like three years
for crisis of conscience to comeout so i'm thinking within the
(01:33:05):
next 12 months that if he isgoing to write a book hopefully
he's writing it now
SPEAKER_01 (01:33:09):
nice
SPEAKER_00 (01:33:11):
and you know that he
does and that he's truthful but
you know if it oh my god can youimagine the whole world will
come crashing down Can youimagine?
I
SPEAKER_01 (01:33:26):
would need an
autographed copy.
SPEAKER_00 (01:33:28):
I know.
I'll sign it for you.
But, you know, his autographain't as good as mine.
Mine's better.
SPEAKER_01 (01:33:37):
That's true.
That's true.
SPEAKER_00 (01:33:40):
His ain't nothing
without...
He wouldn't be nothing withoutme either.
So it's like, whatever.
He wouldn't be nothing.
Some too big governing bodymember.
Now he's famous.
He's famous.
told you i'd make you famousuncle tony
SPEAKER_01 (01:33:56):
you did he's
SPEAKER_00 (01:34:00):
famous i remember
saying that to him i was like oh
no uncle tony you want to befamous you want to be famous
buddy i'll make you famous he'sfamous now he can be famous so
wow i know no now it's time forarrogance Now is time for
(01:34:21):
arrogance.
There's no arguing with aJehovah's Witness anymore.
There's no point of talkingother doctrine.
It's like, no, you're a fool.
You're just a bunch of stupidfools.
There's no point.
And now it's time for usapostates to mock, have fun,
(01:34:42):
have a good time.
The pressure's off.
They're stupid.
they have to cover their faceswith hair because they're
embarrassed and they can do soand you know now's when the
party gets started you know youknow man i feel like a woman you
know i'm not a i feel like awoman now it's time to party
SPEAKER_01 (01:35:06):
that's why i showed
up i heard it was gonna be a
party
SPEAKER_00 (01:35:09):
yep i know i'm
pushing the red button there's
gonna be a party
SPEAKER_01 (01:35:13):
i'm here now big
mitch is
SPEAKER_00 (01:35:16):
here i know Penis
hand Mitch, the back of the
songbook guy.
You know, you should be a wristmodel.
You should be a wrist model,Mitch.
Look at the wrist.
Be a wrist model.
(01:35:36):
We should recreate it.
Oh, my God.
Because, you know, I know how toedit.
We should recreate the back ofthe songbook.
I'll
SPEAKER_01 (01:35:48):
have my daughter
take a picture of my wrist and
I'll send you this.
SPEAKER_00 (01:35:54):
And hold a songbook.
SPEAKER_01 (01:35:55):
Yeah, you do what
you do.
SPEAKER_00 (01:35:58):
And I will edit it
and we'll make our own back of
the songbook.
How awesome would that be?
SPEAKER_01 (01:36:04):
Oh my goodness, I
SPEAKER_00 (01:36:05):
love it.
Smurf girl and Mitch, back ofthe songbook.
SPEAKER_01 (01:36:08):
Wow.
And have it standing next to me.
SPEAKER_00 (01:36:13):
Too good.
i know you're talking at smurfgirl during the meeting just
keep worshiping up the shrine ofsmurf girl mitch just keep
worshiping at that shrine youknow that's a term you know
worshiping at the shrine ofsmurf girl is when brothers
would go into the bathroom andjerk off when i was at the
meeting that's totally i'm notkidding it was like oh they're
(01:36:36):
in the bathroom for 20 minutesthey're worshiping at the shrine
of smurf girl they made adeposit make a deposit real
quick You know that was a term.
Yes.
And then that was when westarted to install toilet seat
covers at the Kingdom Hall.
Remember when toilet seat coverswere new?
(01:36:58):
I swear to God, toilet seatcovers were invented because of
all the brothers worshiping atthe Shrine of Smurf Girl and the
sisters didn't want toaccidentally get something.
That was the joke.
Toilet seat covers...
were invented because ofJehovah's Witness brothers
spending too much time in thebathroom at the game hall.
(01:37:24):
Swear to you.
I mean, that's like the joke.
That's the urban legend.
SPEAKER_02 (01:37:29):
Oh, my goodness.
SPEAKER_00 (01:37:31):
Of toilet seat
covers.
I swear to you.
But anyway.
All right.
Well, let's wrap it up.
Wrap it up, Mitch.
SPEAKER_01 (01:37:40):
Hey, I hope y'all
are doing this.
i was surprised by some thingsas much as you all were so i
hope you enjoyed it you askedfor more smurf girl and i
delivered i gave you more smurfgirl and we had a bonus we had
uncle tony and smurf girl so ihope y'all enjoyed the episode
(01:38:03):
look either of us up she did itshe even did it this afternoon
and found us It talked about theshow.
It talked about us.
So look us up.
We're on social mediaeverywhere.
We have this channel.
Help us.
Help us make this channel grow.
Like, share the videos.
(01:38:24):
Subscribe.
We thank all of you all.
And thank you, Smurf Girl.
SPEAKER_00 (01:38:29):
thank you thank you
uncle tony for such great
entertainment too oh it's mypleasure peanut thanks mitch for
having me on
SPEAKER_01 (01:38:40):
oh yeah anytime uh
yeah i'm gonna go take these
wrist picks and uh yeah we willcatch you all on tuesday
SPEAKER_00 (01:38:53):
yep love you guys
thanks for tuning in
SPEAKER_01 (01:38:56):
love you have a
great weekend talk to you soon
SPEAKER_00 (01:38:59):
Bye.
Love you.
UNKNOWN (01:39:02):
Love you.