March 11, 2025 • 52 mins
We explore how dads can help kids open up by modeling humility, telling the truth about weakness, and asking what God is doing rather than forcing results. Stories of mercy, recovery, and practical prayer show a path from silence to trust and from control to connection.
• Creating safety through honest confession
• Breaking the “I can handle it” lie
• Modeling dependence on God like Jesus
• Asking better questions and listening well
• Praying for alignment with the Father’s work
• Navigating addiction with surrender and support
• Recognizing spiritual warfare against families
• Living honorably so children can honor
• Practical steps to rebuild trust at home
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
What kind of father do you want to be?
What kind of man do you want tobecome for your family and for
yourself?
If you've ever wondered how tostep into the fullness of your
role as a father, husband, andman of God, then you're in the
right place.
Here at the Father Difference,our mission is to inspire and
equip men to be the best fathersthey can be.
(00:23):
It's a powerful mission.
And today, we're going toexplore exactly how you can take
steps toward that calling.
Whether you're a father, a son,a husband, grandfather, single
dad, stepfather, or just lookingto grow, I believe God has
something powerful for you intoday's message.
(00:43):
Whether you're tuning in live orwatching this later, we are so
excited to have you here.
If this is what you're lookingfor, then subscribe so you can
tune in each week to the FatherDifference Live.
You can sign up below.
And now your host, a husband,father, grandfather, author, and
(01:04):
former NFL player, Pastor EdMcGlass.
SPEAKER_01 (01:17):
Hey, well, welcome.
It's good to be with you.
I am your host today on theFather Difference Podcast.
And today we are talking about acontinuation of last week.
How as a dad, we can really helpour children to open up to us
(01:38):
about their struggles.
Because there's one thing that'strue, that's true about you, and
it's true about me, is that whenour children are struggling, or
when we're struggling, thatstruggle intensifies, and we we
many times feel hopeless tochange in the midst of those
(02:02):
kinds of things.
Because and and the hopelessnesskind of grows because we're made
to be to grow inside acommunity, inside a family, the
first unit in our life.
And when our children are afraidof letting you in on way where
they struggle, they do thatbecause the devil's got them to
(02:26):
believe that when they do, youwon't respect them anymore.
Or maybe some of your style as adad has been overly
disciplinarian to try to getthem to become what you think
they're supposed to be, and toshare failure with you would be
(02:48):
a hard thing.
And one of the reasons thathappens with us as parents is I
don't know about you, but Iwasn't raised with the with when
my dad, my my dad, my birthfather was killed in action.
My stepfather did the best hecould, but I don't re recall a
single moment in all the timethat I knew him.
(03:12):
He's in heaven now, where hecame to me and said, Son, I'm
really struggling with this inmy life.
Would you pray for me?
And so guess what I didn't do?
Well, I didn't share my weaknessor my struggle either, because I
didn't want to disappoint him.
(03:34):
As though the sin that I did asa young man was so far greater
than anything.
And there was just there was aone moment, a very telling
moment, with my brother Dan andmy father.
And I was the witness to this,but I never really got that same
kind of treatment.
I don't know if it's because Iwas an older son, right?
(03:58):
I had to carry the familylegacy.
But my brother Dan, you know,decided he was gonna drive my
car that was my dad's car aroundthe parking lot during practice.
And he was convinced that hecould drive.
(04:21):
And so somehow he snuck my keysout of my gym bag and went over,
started the car.
My dad was actually there uhwatching practice, and my
brother got going, and he wasjust a little guy and got
confused with the brake and theaccelerator.
(04:46):
You can already, you alreadyknow the end of the story.
And so he's he's going towards atelephone pole with a with a big
strap wire connected to it.
And he lost control.
He went back and he went to slamon the brakes, he slammed on the
(05:07):
accelerator and launched the carinto that big thick cable and
didn't snap it, but bent thefront of that car in like an
accordion.
And we all heard the racket andstopped practice, and my my
(05:28):
stepdad runs over there, looksat my brother, and I am
expecting the same kind oftongue-lashing that I so so
deserved, I think, and manytimes, because I was a rascal.
(05:50):
And he looks at his at Daniel,my brother, and he goes, Well,
you know, and my brother wasjust he was already crying, he
was shaking.
I mean, he was just a young guy,and he said, You know, son, I
remember my father goinghunting, and he looked at me,
threw me the keys, and said,Don't drive the car around the
(06:13):
field.
You just hang here till I getback from hunting.
And me and my buddies weresitting there, we're all young
kids.
My our dads wouldn't let us goshooting because we were too
young.
And I ended up starting this carup, but we got in a little race
around the cornfield.
Tearing up the cornfield, to thechagrin of the farmer that let
(06:36):
us go out there and shoot.
I end up running into a big rockand demo and almost completely
destroying my dad's truck.
And he looks at my brother andhe goes, You know, son, we all
make mistakes.
(06:56):
I could not believe my ears.
I could not believe my ears thathere was, you know, my stepdad
showed my brother mercy in themidst of what he was doing.
And and yet I never saw thatside of him.
(07:17):
So a lot of kids come up comeaway from childhood with
different kinds of things, but Iwant to talk today about why
your children are resistingletting you into their
struggles.
So, right from the beginning, Ijust want to ask you a big
(07:38):
kahuna question as a dad, as aman, and that's this I'm gonna
take a drink of water.
How often do you let your ownsons and daughters know about
your personal struggles and howyou deal with them?
(08:00):
Because we've been talking aboutissues of addiction.
It seems like there's a lot ofthose today.
I mean, I I don't know, maybeit's just the same in every
culture, but I'm dealing withparents right now with children,
and some of the men I'm dealingwith in our coaching time, some
of them have real seriousaddiction issues.
We got some issues in our familythat we're dealing with, with
(08:24):
people that we absolutely love.
And part of, you know, part ofthe part of the secret to being
able to help the process withsomebody who's struggling is not
to point out how broken theyare.
Well, that's they only knowthat.
(08:46):
Not to point out how they aresabotaging their future.
They they're not really clearabout all that.
When somebody, when one of yourchildren or somebody you love is
is stuck in in addiction, it'she's in that place of addiction
or in that place of brokennessbecause he believes something
(09:07):
the same way we believesomething when we're broken.
And you know what that is?
And that's this I can handle it.
I'm okay.
I don't need to talk to my dad,I don't need to confess, I don't
need to go to church, I don'tneed to go to a program.
I can handle it.
(09:28):
Well, that's the first step intothat place of addiction in your
life where you you're building adeeper hole for yourself.
And the only way out of that, Imean, the only way is to be able
to have conversation, even withyour children and the way you
(09:52):
deal with it, with the truth is,and it's the first step of
recovery, is when you say, areable to say honestly, I can't
stop doing this, but God canhelp me.
And see, part of part of thereason that our children are in
(10:16):
those places of addiction or inthose places of struggle in
their life is because they aretaking on the role of being the
God of their own life.
And how do I know that?
Well, those places in my heartthat I've become bound to in the
past, or even those things Ideal with now, are places where
(10:38):
I am seating myself in the placeof authority in those places.
And when it doesn't matter thatpeople see how I'm broken, it
doesn't matter how much theymention that I'm broken.
But the secret lies in ourtransformation is when we really
(11:01):
are able to say, I can't stopdoing this.
Every addict that I've workedwith has the same thing.
It's the same verbiage that Iwould say is I can change this.
I promise I won't do it again.
It might be a son, it might be adaughter, it it you know, it
(11:23):
might be a relative, it might besomebody that you care about, it
might be a buddy, it might be afriend.
And as long as you're in controlof the output of your life,
because you know, let's face it,most of the a lot of the books
that are written out there ofpeople that have are become uber
(11:43):
successful and they sell thesebooks.
There's a whole lot of humanpower in what they read.
And it's basically, hey man, ifyou can learn to be powerful
like me, you can you can build amulti-dollar million-dollar
business in 90 days if you gothrough my course.
(12:06):
And they'll get a fewtestimonies of people, and they
just build on the the momentumof that, where the source of
your strength, they might beeven praising Jesus, but at the
core of your strength is youknow, that old Sinatra song, I
(12:27):
did it my way.
See, the ultimate sin that wasoffered to Adam and Eve in the
Garden of Eden when God said,You can eat of any tree in the
garden.
There was no limitations, butthe tree of the knowledge of
good and evil, and the day youeat of it, your eyes, you know,
(12:47):
you will surely die.
That's what God said to Adam andEve.
You're not going to be likepartially dead, you are
spiritually dead.
And I don't think theyunderstood even what death was.
They have a limited perspectiveof death because of animals,
they lived for so long.
Creation was different thananything that we had.
(13:10):
Sin had not entered into theworld until Adam and Eve bit
into that fruit that God saidthey do it, and their eyes were
opened.
And basically, the temptationwas for God knows from the devil
who was a talking snake, and theday you eat of that fruit, your
(13:31):
eyes are going to be openbecause God doesn't want you to
know that you can be the boss ofyour own life.
That's my own Englishinterpretation of that.
You get to choose what is goodand what is bad.
Have you noticed in our world,you know, with people, is that
there's there's this value onpeople saying, Well, I have my
(13:53):
own truth.
You have your truth, I have mytruth.
And that that's pretty muchlevel until you start talking
about the truth of Jesus thattrumps all of our personal
truths.
And they may, well, I don'tbelieve in that.
I don't believe in that.
I don't believe that that's asin.
I don't believe that's wrong.
(14:14):
I was working with somebody inthis past couple weeks, and they
said, Well, I don't believe inrecovery.
I think it's a bunch ofnonsense.
I said, Well, it seems as thoughyour entire life, your family,
you've you've lost connectionwith your kids, you've you lost
(14:34):
your relationship with the birthmother, you're struggling at
your job, you're you're sneakingaround and drinking, you're
still going to church, and I'msure you're asking God for
forgiveness for everything.
(14:55):
And you're you're trying to hidehow much you drink, you're
becoming violent with people,and and your family, your your
family is suffering.
And if you put all those thingstogether, the chances are really
high that you you have an in anincurable disease in your soul
(15:20):
that you can't personally healyourself.
And the reason why it's growingin you is because you're in
charge.
And you know, I remember youknow looking at him and and
saying, Do you think you're God?
(15:41):
You think you can actually willyourself to be a different
person?
Well, yeah, you would say, Well,where where when does that
happen?
When have you been able to evermaintain this issue?
Well, maybe maybe there's awhole different way.
(16:02):
Like what?
When you learn how to say thewords, I can't, I need help.
I can't do it, Dad.
I need help.
And to bring your children tothat point where that they're
that brutally honest about wherethey struggle.
That's how I'm gonna I'm gonnatalk and give you a few keys
(16:23):
today about how to not only openup your own life, to give them a
roadmap and of how to be a man,or you know, you as a father,
you know, the way you'remodeling that to your children
will be the starting point ofthem learning how to deal with
(16:45):
those things that want to ownthem.
Because the truth of the matter,and and listen to me when I say
this, that we're all we're allguilty of something, and we're
all addicted to something thatwe need to bring before the Lord
and not only receiveforgiveness, but really receive
(17:09):
the power that we need and thehelp and the community and all
those things around us that weneed to get well.
And that doesn't happen when youthink, well, I I can handle
this.
Those are the last, you know,that that's like the guy who
doesn't went and get into thelifeboat on the Titanic because
(17:33):
he just figures this thing'sunsinkable.
I'm just gonna stay back.
I can handle this.
And he perishes.
And there's that moment, youknow, on the Titanic when, of
course, they didn't have enoughlifeboats, is that you had to
get in that lifeboat if you wona chance to live.
(17:54):
And Jesus is our lifeboat.
It's for you, it's for yourchildren, it's for your family.
And I'm here to tell you God cando extraordinary miracles when
we bring those places in us, andit's really called repentance in
the Bible, where we bring whatwe can't do before the Lord and
(18:18):
say, Lord, I can't fix this.
I need your help.
I can't fix this, and maybe gowith a friend to a recovery
group, and we'll talk some moreabout that.
And so I want to share with youa couple of slides that will
help us kind of navigate this.
Now, one of the verses that Ilove so much, and it's the
(18:45):
internal life of Jesus, is hesays to his disciples, I say to
you, the Son of Man can donothing on his own accord.
In a real way, Jesus was saying,I can do nothing, right?
You know, he determined to notcome and be Superman, where he
(19:07):
just flies in to save the day.
That wasn't what Jesus' planwas.
Jesus' plan was to come andmodel to you and to me what a
dependent life means on hisfather and the power and the
person of the Holy Spirit.
Because if he would have come asa superstar, to where, like some
(19:29):
of the movies portray, the organmusic goes up when he speaks and
all those, you know, kind ofmoments, a dramatic thing that
unfortunately sometimes thechurch has staged, you know, men
of God who are more than human.
They're superhuman and can doall these kinds of things.
(19:52):
And and and we get entertained,and of course we go, and
somebody has a gift of healing,we want to be healed, but it's
not the model of the way Jesusdid things.
Jesus constantly was seeking hisfather for what he was doing
(20:12):
around him, and then hedetermined to only do what his
father was doing.
He laid down his right to beGod.
He was God in the flesh, but hemodeled what it's like to follow
his father, and then ultimatelythen calls us to follow him.
(20:34):
And so the scripture goes on andsays, but he only he only can do
what he sees his father doing.
So one of the one of the secretsof ministering to your children
is asking, we're gonna talkabout questions in a moment, but
(20:55):
it's staying in this place whereyou and and this is gonna make
this is gonna might be a biglight bulb for you, but it's
really asking God what He isdoing with your son and your
daughter versus what you alreadyknow they should be doing.
(21:19):
I was at a news conferencebefore a big event I did with
focus on the family and that andsome other speakers.
We were at an event, and so thethe crowd could ask any
questions they want to ask.
And after about oh, 45 minutes,a parent directed a question at
(21:46):
me, and he said, How can I getmy son to to do it right?
And I mean, he was just jumpingin my grill, you know.
And I said, What why are you somad?
Because he's not turning out theway he was raised.
(22:08):
So he was you know strugglingbecause his son wasn't
listening.
Well, well, why would any sonlisten to a father who speaks
that way?
And I said, Is that the way thatyou talk to your son?
He goes, Well, yeah, it's he'sfrustrating.
Tell me how I can get my son todo what's right, and I said, Can
(22:35):
I ask you a question?
Is that the way God talks toyou?
And he just his shouldersslumped.
No.
Well, how does God the Fatherget you to do what he wants?
(22:55):
And it just stumps him.
And I said, Isn't it doesn't heshow you what to do every day?
And when you do it, you havelike a great day.
Doesn't matter if you'reattacked, or it doesn't matter
if you don't hit all your goals,but you you get this this
four-letter word that is one ofthe most powerful words for us
(23:19):
as followers of Jesus.
It's a word with W I T H.
You move from doing a solitarylife for proving yourself to God
to doing a life with him, andthat's what Jesus came to bring
(23:46):
is with most of the system inthose days was about all the
things that you would do forGod.
If you really, if you're holy,God will then bless you.
If you're you do all thesethings just right, then God will
bless you.
And Jesus came who dideverything right, and when we
(24:08):
learn to let go of the pride ofour victories and even a failure
and an embrace that we can'twithout him, we begin to
discover the life of what itmeans to be with him.
And when you discover that,you'll be a roadmap to teach
(24:31):
your children how to be withGod, too.
And it'll change yourrelationship to them.
It's incredibly, incrediblypowerful.
You know, that verse goes on,and it says, For the father, for
whatever the father does, theson does likewise.
(24:53):
And I just love this.
For the father himself loves theson and shows him all that he
himself is doing.
And so why is it John writingthis?
Because John sees that Jesus didhis life completely different
(25:13):
than all the leaders of the day.
And he did a life that wasn'tabout proving that he was the
Messiah.
He lived, Jesus lived a lifeconnected and only doing what he
saw his father doing.
(25:33):
Even those impossible things,when he was, he discerned that
he was on the way to ending hislife and dying on the cross.
Imagine the level of humilityand obedience and trust that he
had with his father to use thathorrible moment of suffering
that he was going to have toendure for all mankind.
(25:58):
And he didn't run away from it.
Because he learned to trust thatif he follows him and does what
he's doing, there will be allthe grace that he needs to have
to do what God is asking him todo.
I found that so true with my ownchildren.
(26:20):
And so my prayer began to changefrom grow my son up so he's not
so immature, blah, blah, blah,blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah, blah, into Father.
I pray you would speak to my sontoday.
And you would open scripture sohe could discover the things
(26:42):
that you're doing with his life.
Lord, give him that compass ofbeing loved and connected to
you, even when he's broken.
And Father, give him the heartto let me into a story.
And then give me the grace,Lord, to to treat him the same
(27:06):
way you've treated me.
Isn't that powerful?
That's the that's that's theheart that will begin to shift
and open the door to a lost kidor somebody who is there.
Because the the other part ofthis, then when our kids are
(27:29):
struggling, they're alsobattling demonic forces that are
doing everything it can to ownand demonize your children and
separate you.
You know, people will say today,well, there seems to be so much
more wickedness than in Jesus'day.
Well, wicked the devil hasalways been trying to destroy
(27:50):
God's beloved sons anddaughters, always.
Because he got no birthright.
You know, a chief cherubim wasbanished out of heaven.
You know, the book of Ezekieltalks about his fall.
And from that moment on, his warhas been against the sons of
(28:11):
men, against fathers and mothersand families.
And if he can destroy the unitof the mother and father, and
sons and daughters, andblessing, uh, he can get them.
I mean, even the fifthcommandment that God gave was
this profound potential blessingfor your children when they
(28:36):
honor their father and mother,honor your father and mother,
that it may go well with you inthe land and you might find
favor.
It's the only commandment thatis this incredible, that has
this incredible promise writtenright into it, that you get
favor as a child when you honoryour dad and you honor your
(29:01):
mother.
And so the challenge for you andme, is dads, and a few of the
moms who slipped in there is tolive an honorable life so that
they're gonna want to have thesame kind of relationship with
Jesus and the Father that youdo.
(29:23):
And that is incredibly powerful.
Incredibly powerful.
And by the way, that'scompletely possible.
It's been Jesus' plan all along.
I'm just gonna share a few morescriptures tonight that it's for
you to think about.
And here's one that, and here'sanother, you know, here's Paul,
(29:47):
one of the disciples of Jesus.
And it's around this whole issueof learning how to follow and
receive.
For I decided to know nothingamong you except Jesus Christ
and Him crucified.
And I was with you in weaknessand in fear and much trembling.
And my speech and my messagewere not in plausible words of
(30:11):
wisdom, but in a demonstrationof the spirit and of power, so
that your faith might not restin the wisdom of men, but in the
power of God.
I mean, here's Paul in hissecond journey into this area.
The first time they ran him outon a rail because nobody trusted
him, because he was a greatpersecutor of Christians.
(30:33):
And the second time he comes, hecomes different after this long
time out in the desert where Godwas preparing him.
Paul learned how to receive.
Because not only was he going tocome back and ministry in power
differently, but he was going tobe imprisoned.
And he was going to write muchof the New Testament epistles
(30:55):
and letters to the church thatwere going to last for thousands
of years.
So God had to do somethinginside him where he learned that
he was not where he came from,that he became who he learned to
that God wanted him to be.
And so he decided, you know,that, you know, my job isn't to
(31:17):
go up there and wow them with mygreat oratory skills.
He said they came with in muchfear and much trembling.
You know, there's a moment whenyou're, and if you've been a
speaker or shared anything, youknow exactly what I'm about to
say to you.
Is that I've had messages that Igot I got so excited about
(31:44):
preaching them that I was I wasgetting saved all over again in
the writing of the message.
You guys ever do that?
Were you just like, man, you hadan anointed pen.
And then you stand up in frontof that crowd of wherever you
are, and you realize that what'scoming out of your mouth that in
(32:06):
your study was these bold andpowerful words, and you got
visions of big altar calls andthe kingdom of God.
You know, you might have a, youknow, and and yet when you get
up there, you feel like a wetblanket.
I I remember, you know, one ofthe first times I shared about
(32:27):
the blessing of the father to amen's community.
And man, I I ran up there like,man, I was just gonna change the
world.
It's like the old preacher'sson.
You know, he's waiting for histime to preach.
And and yeah, he had gone toBible school, came back.
He's now an assistant pastor andhis dad's big mega church.
(32:50):
And and you know, each Sunday hegoes, Hey, dad, I'm ready, man.
I got a word from God, Daddy.
You want to let me go up thereand preach the word of God?
And so he true story about thiskid.
And his father goes, No, you'renot ready yet.
You're not ready yet.
And a couple weeks go by.
Same kind of thing.
Daddy, I got a word from God.
(33:10):
If you just let me deliver it,it'll hit with great impact.
And father said, No, you're notready yet.
And after bothering his dad nowthe third time, a few weeks
later, he says, All right, son,you just kind of go up there and
go do it.
So he ran up there and grabbedthat pulpit.
And the moment hit him, where hewasn't just uh speaking a great
(33:34):
sermon he had rehearsed.
He was getting ready.
He was going up into a placewhere you had to learn to
listen, no matter what you'vewritten, and to hear from God
for the sake of those peoplethat are in front of you to love
and preach the gospel to.
And great communicators learnhow to do this.
(33:58):
Loud communicators, they don'tcare what people think, they're
just loud and excited aboutsomething.
And went up there and he frozeand he put his head down, so
discouraged, and he walked downto the oh, I just I realized I
had on my slide.
And he walked down, sat down andlike this and all discouraged.
(34:22):
And his daddy leaned in andgoes, son, if you'd have gone up
how you came down, you'd havecame down like you went up.
And that's what happened withme.
Man, I was so excited aboutdoing this first men's retreat.
I got up there to deliver thegoods.
(34:44):
And I just I sucked.
I I I was just I was sodiscouraged and didn't realize
that I was experiencing thespiritual warfare of the men in
that crowd that were listeningto me.
(35:04):
I had made it all about myself.
I was like, I can't believe myjoke, nobody's laughing.
The jokes don't seem, I'm notgetting any feedback.
And for speakers, that's hard.
And so I'm trying to, you know,do my best.
And and I was just, I can't waitto get through this.
I come to the end with probablymy worst ultra call call for
(35:28):
somebody to be saved or toreceive a blessing they never
got from their father.
And I I said something to theeffect, I know there's probably
nobody here that this meantanything to.
I, you know, sort, you know, Istruggled getting this message
out.
But if there's like maybe oneperson, yeah, I just have one
(35:52):
hand.
Even if you, you know, it'slike, even if the janitor in the
back could just give me somelove that this is okay.
And I said, if there's anybodyhere, you know, come on up.
I'd love to pray for you.
And I put my head down and Iclosed my book to walk off of
(36:12):
the stage without looking up.
I heard all this noise andlooked.
And almost the entire room ofmen had was moving forward
weeping.
And I was completely shocked.
I was like, and the Lord justwhispered, He goes, Don't say,
(36:36):
It's not about you, Ed.
I was letting you feel whatevery man in this room feels.
That's the war that these dadscome under all the time.
Where they are marginalized,where they're demonized.
He's just showing this to me.
(36:58):
And the compassion of the Lordgrabs my heart.
And as I ministered and led, Ican't tell you how many of the
couple hundred men that cameforward, hardly anybody in their
seats, weeping and crying, andwatching God the Father through
the Holy Spirit and Jesus turnthese boys in a lot of way who
(37:24):
had horrible dad stories intothe fathers that God had called
them to be with this incredibleblessing.
And see, that's how God changesus to help us with our kids.
We're gonna tie this togetheraround that right now.
Then maybe maybe you thoughtthat you just don't have the
(37:46):
equipment to be a great dad.
Or that your story was toobroken.
Or maybe you're watching and youreally feel like you've messed
up too much.
Well, I gotta I gotta tell you,you know, this one thing I've
(38:11):
learned over and over and overagain is a father now, a
grandfather of of manygrandkids.
It's not about how perfect weare, it's about us learning how
to go to that perfect one and toget what we need by saying the
simple words that are reallypowerful is Father, I can't do
(38:35):
this without you.
Could you show me how to dothis?
Father, I I can't reach my sonright now.
He's angry with me, show me howI can reach my son.
Father, my wife is pushing away,our marriage is lost the
(38:57):
passion, show me what you'redoing with my wife so I can love
her and minister to her.
And so when you approach yourson or your daughter or God in a
way without the answers, andthat you're not the answer for
them.
(39:18):
Really big point, but that Godis, and that you model how to
take your broke your ownbrokenness to God, and you let
your kids in on that, that'llopen the door in their heart
more often than not.
(39:39):
It might take time because youknow, let's face it, a lot of us
have been have been equipped tolisten to sermons and great
teachings, and we translate thatinto the way we talk to our
children with great sermons andgreat teaching.
(40:04):
And the difference of Jesus withsome preachers, not all of them,
was that he was able to say,Follow me as I follow my father.
Follow me as I follow my father.
(40:35):
The son does likewise.
For the father himself loved theson and shows him everything
he's doing.
And the reason why that is rightin the middle of that verse,
it's this amazing nugget.
For the father himself loves theson, and the truth of the
(40:58):
matter, beloved one, is thefather himself loves you and
wants to father you so that youcan be the father your children
need you to be, you can be thegrandfather your grandkids and
(41:18):
your children need you to be.
You can be the husband and loveyour wife the way God has made
you to do that, and what anincredible gift we get as
followers of Jesus, where he notonly calls us to do something we
(41:42):
can't possibly do, but at thatmoment of saying, I can't, Lord,
do this, but you can, and weturn to him that the Holy Spirit
will bring the grace of God andthe anointing we need to empower
you and me to do something wenever saw our fathers do with
(42:07):
our moms.
We never saw we date them indifferent ways than we seen
model.
We've learned to follow and dothings with our children that we
never saw our dad do with us.
And the more we live in thatspace of receiving, the more
(42:28):
impact you will make as afather.
And so next week we're gonnacontinue on more of this, even a
deeper level of this.
And I don't want to let the catout the bag, but before I get
off, before we pray, because I'mgonna pray for you, is that we
(42:49):
have something that we'vereleased that I think would be
an incredible opportunity foryou, for your family, for your
kids, and that's our FatherhoodAcademy.
I'm gonna talk about it at theend, but we've built an academy
with online courses and thatcomes also with live coaching,
(43:09):
with yours truly, to help youbecome the father that maybe
you've always wanted to be, orbe the father that God has
designed you to be.
And so we've named it theFatherhood Academy because when
we allow God to father us,right, the same way he fathered
(43:30):
his son Jesus, that will equipus to father our children in
ways that maybe we have neverseen from any other dad.
And that's incredibly powerful.
And I'm gonna tell you, my lifeis a testament, testament to
being fathered by God.
(43:50):
And I think one of the greatbenefits that God gave me in my
life, that's a benefit now,wasn't a benefit in my early
story, was that my dad, when hehe took off these dog tags and
laid them on the bedside tableas he was going to test his Fury
(44:11):
3 jet in 1956.
Well, I had not been born yet,about a month after his crash,
but he was killed in action.
So I never had a moment with mydad.
I had a stepdad that did hisbest to love me, but I had this
missing piece in me that Ithought I was going to be
(44:33):
forever broken and forgottenbecause I didn't have a dad.
There's a lot of guys I meet whothink that they're gonna be
screwed up forever because theycarry a wound from their dad and
not a blessing.
I'm here to tell you that nomatter how good your dad was, we
all got wounds we carry, becauseno dads are perfect.
(44:53):
But God sent his only son sothat when we learn to totally
receive him, he opens a door tohis father for us that
completely changes our life,where we get refathered by God
Himself.
For I will be a father to you,and you will be my sons and
(45:13):
daughters, says the Lord GodAlmighty.
Second Corinthians 16, verse 9.
That's what God wants, I thinkit might be verse 18.
That's what God's doing.
That's what he did with me,that's what he can do with you.
And the Father Academy is builtaround that premise with our
podcast, with our onlineteaching, with one-on-one
(45:34):
coaching with me is an optionthat you can sign up for.
But to do that, you got to go tomy website and sign up.
And we've discounted it for thefirst hundred new members.
We have a bunch of membersalready around the country.
We got members around thecountry, and all you gotta do is
sign up and uh come hang outwith us.
(45:58):
And I would love an opportunityto just be one of those coaches
in your story to help youconnect more to the father.
Because I know you're watchingthis because you want to be the
best dad you can be, or the bestgrandpa, or you just want to
learn how to love the woman thatyou have, maybe your wife.
(46:18):
This is we have gals that are inour program too.
And so girls carry that samewound too.
So if you're interested, signup.
And we I would love to uh I seeit's gonna throw that up there.
Go to the fatherdifference.com,it'll be right there on the
screen.
So before I get off of here, letme pray for you.
(46:43):
And if you've got prayerrequests that you want to uh
shoot to me or send me an emailand say, I would love to get
with you.
I have some family issues that II don't want to talk about
online, but I I really I needsome help.
If you're interested in our inour coaching program, your first
(47:05):
time with me is free.
And all you gotta do is sign up.
You can get that right at ourwebsite at fatherdifference.com.
And I would love to meet withyou and see if it's a good fit,
if if our services and what wedo can really help you.
Because, you know, I reallybelieve in one thing the Beatles
(47:25):
said, we can get by with thehelp from a friend.
And that's what we do here.
So, Father, I thank you for myfriends that are watching.
I thank you for for the timethey've invested tonight to
learn about how to become thebest dad, or maybe for the gals,
the best mom they could be.
I pray, Lord, that you wouldmeet them where they are in such
(47:48):
a profound way and you wouldbless them with that same
blessing that you're they thateverybody saw that Jesus
carried.
I pray, Lord, that you wouldrestore their relationship with
their children and give them theright kind of heart to be
present enough to help theirchildren see a model of somebody
(48:09):
who's on the way to heaven,who's broken to.
Lord, I pray that you wouldbless them.
I pray that you would heal theirrelationship with their kids.
And I just I ask you, Lord, thatyou would be with them in
profound ways and heal theirfamilies.
In the name of Jesus, I pray.
(48:29):
Amen.
Amen.
One of the services that uh Ioffer is helping you with kids
that won't talk to you.
And uh, I found that the youngpeople, if they like football,
they would they'll meet with afootball player or maybe
somebody other than their dad.
(48:50):
If you want some coaching,that's available.
You can get a hold of me at mywebsite.
Would love to help you.
And uh, that's all I gotta say.
I'm gonna go have a greatdinner, go kiss your sweetheart
after you brush your teeth.
Didn't you do that when you weredating?
Wasn't your breath like crystalclear, evergreen?
(49:14):
Then you get married, you know.
So, anyway, Lord bless you.
I'm so grateful that you're withme.
You're here, your time isimportant to me.
And I hope this is a blessing.
I love your comments.
You can reach out to me onemail, Instagram, Facebook,
YouTube, LinkedIn, Rumble X.
I'm on all of them.
(49:36):
So remember, my friends, it'snever too late for God to do a
miracle in our lives, to be thefather we've always wanted, and
to make us into the fathers andmen that God has destined us to
be.
Well, check out this video atthe end.
Thank you for your support.
If you want to support us, itwould mean the world to us to
(49:59):
reach the men that God's leadingus to.
God bless you.
SPEAKER_00 (50:04):
Dear friends, imagine a world where every
father feels equipped to leadwith faith, love, and purpose.
A world where families thriveand communities grow stronger
because of devoted,Christ-centered fathers.
SPEAKER_01 (50:19):
You know, beloved, that is the vision that God's
put in my heart for every singlefamily.
You know, he is on the move, Ibelieve.
He promises in Malachi thatbefore the great and coming day
of the Lord, he's gonna dosomething profound.
He's gonna turn the hearts offathers back towards their
(50:41):
children.
So the hearts of their childrenwill turn back to their father.
That's what God is doing.
I mean, dads daily, who want tolearn to be better fathers.
Yet many have never been shownhow.
Too many families are beingfractured through bitterness and
with parents and grandparentseven being canceled.
(51:03):
That's why we're launching anonline community to quit and to
be the fathers that God hascalled them to be.
It's more than a program, it's apart of a a movement that God is
already doing to reshapefatherhood.
It's a sacred calling rooted inthe teachings of pride.
(51:24):
And we're calling this theFatherhood Academy, where men
will embark on a journey ofhealing and spiritual
restoration that helps themtransform their family
relationship.
And to make this vision areality, would you consider
partnering with us financiallyas we continue to reach and
(51:48):
disciple every man, dad, andgrandpa that comes our way?
Your donation will help create aripple across the neighborhoods,
communities, you know, andultimately our nature, anchoring
each child, their division andthe unwavering love and guidance
of a devoted dad.
SPEAKER_00 (52:09):
Will you partner with us?
Your gift, whether a one-timedonation or ongoing monthly
support, will help to transformlives.
Together, we can equip fathersand grandfathers to lead with
faith and create a brighter,hopefully future for generations
(52:30):
to come.
Click the link to donate today.
Thank you for believing in thismission and joining us on this
transformative journey.
What kind of father do you want to be?
What kind of man do you want tobecome for your family and for
yourself?
If you've ever wondered how tostep into the fullness of your
role as a father, husband, andman of God, then you're in the
right place.
Here at the Father Difference,our mission is to inspire and
equip men to be the best fathersthey can be.
(00:23):
It's a powerful mission.
And today, we're going toexplore exactly how you can take
steps toward that calling.
Whether you're a father, a son,a husband, grandfather, single
dad, stepfather, or just lookingto grow, I believe God has
something powerful for you intoday's message.
(00:43):
Whether you're tuning in live orwatching this later, we are so
excited to have you here.
If this is what you're lookingfor, then subscribe so you can
tune in each week to the FatherDifference Live.
You can sign up below.
And now your host, a husband,father, grandfather, author, and
(01:04):
former NFL player, Pastor EdMcGlass.
SPEAKER_01 (01:17):
Hey, well, welcome.
It's good to be with you.
I am your host today on theFather Difference Podcast.
And today we are talking about acontinuation of last week.
How as a dad, we can really helpour children to open up to us
(01:38):
about their struggles.
Because there's one thing that'strue, that's true about you, and
it's true about me, is that whenour children are struggling, or
when we're struggling, thatstruggle intensifies, and we we
many times feel hopeless tochange in the midst of those
(02:02):
kinds of things.
Because and and the hopelessnesskind of grows because we're made
to be to grow inside acommunity, inside a family, the
first unit in our life.
And when our children are afraidof letting you in on way where
they struggle, they do thatbecause the devil's got them to
(02:26):
believe that when they do, youwon't respect them anymore.
Or maybe some of your style as adad has been overly
disciplinarian to try to getthem to become what you think
they're supposed to be, and toshare failure with you would be
(02:48):
a hard thing.
And one of the reasons thathappens with us as parents is I
don't know about you, but Iwasn't raised with the with when
my dad, my my dad, my birthfather was killed in action.
My stepfather did the best hecould, but I don't re recall a
single moment in all the timethat I knew him.
(03:12):
He's in heaven now, where hecame to me and said, Son, I'm
really struggling with this inmy life.
Would you pray for me?
And so guess what I didn't do?
Well, I didn't share my weaknessor my struggle either, because I
didn't want to disappoint him.
(03:34):
As though the sin that I did asa young man was so far greater
than anything.
And there was just there was aone moment, a very telling
moment, with my brother Dan andmy father.
And I was the witness to this,but I never really got that same
kind of treatment.
I don't know if it's because Iwas an older son, right?
(03:58):
I had to carry the familylegacy.
But my brother Dan, you know,decided he was gonna drive my
car that was my dad's car aroundthe parking lot during practice.
And he was convinced that hecould drive.
(04:21):
And so somehow he snuck my keysout of my gym bag and went over,
started the car.
My dad was actually there uhwatching practice, and my
brother got going, and he wasjust a little guy and got
confused with the brake and theaccelerator.
(04:46):
You can already, you alreadyknow the end of the story.
And so he's he's going towards atelephone pole with a with a big
strap wire connected to it.
And he lost control.
He went back and he went to slamon the brakes, he slammed on the
(05:07):
accelerator and launched the carinto that big thick cable and
didn't snap it, but bent thefront of that car in like an
accordion.
And we all heard the racket andstopped practice, and my my
(05:28):
stepdad runs over there, looksat my brother, and I am
expecting the same kind oftongue-lashing that I so so
deserved, I think, and manytimes, because I was a rascal.
(05:50):
And he looks at his at Daniel,my brother, and he goes, Well,
you know, and my brother wasjust he was already crying, he
was shaking.
I mean, he was just a young guy,and he said, You know, son, I
remember my father goinghunting, and he looked at me,
threw me the keys, and said,Don't drive the car around the
(06:13):
field.
You just hang here till I getback from hunting.
And me and my buddies weresitting there, we're all young
kids.
My our dads wouldn't let us goshooting because we were too
young.
And I ended up starting this carup, but we got in a little race
around the cornfield.
Tearing up the cornfield, to thechagrin of the farmer that let
(06:36):
us go out there and shoot.
I end up running into a big rockand demo and almost completely
destroying my dad's truck.
And he looks at my brother andhe goes, You know, son, we all
make mistakes.
(06:56):
I could not believe my ears.
I could not believe my ears thathere was, you know, my stepdad
showed my brother mercy in themidst of what he was doing.
And and yet I never saw thatside of him.
(07:17):
So a lot of kids come up comeaway from childhood with
different kinds of things, but Iwant to talk today about why
your children are resistingletting you into their
struggles.
So, right from the beginning, Ijust want to ask you a big
(07:38):
kahuna question as a dad, as aman, and that's this I'm gonna
take a drink of water.
How often do you let your ownsons and daughters know about
your personal struggles and howyou deal with them?
(08:00):
Because we've been talking aboutissues of addiction.
It seems like there's a lot ofthose today.
I mean, I I don't know, maybeit's just the same in every
culture, but I'm dealing withparents right now with children,
and some of the men I'm dealingwith in our coaching time, some
of them have real seriousaddiction issues.
We got some issues in our familythat we're dealing with, with
(08:24):
people that we absolutely love.
And part of, you know, part ofthe part of the secret to being
able to help the process withsomebody who's struggling is not
to point out how broken theyare.
Well, that's they only knowthat.
(08:46):
Not to point out how they aresabotaging their future.
They they're not really clearabout all that.
When somebody, when one of yourchildren or somebody you love is
is stuck in in addiction, it'she's in that place of addiction
or in that place of brokennessbecause he believes something
(09:07):
the same way we believesomething when we're broken.
And you know what that is?
And that's this I can handle it.
I'm okay.
I don't need to talk to my dad,I don't need to confess, I don't
need to go to church, I don'tneed to go to a program.
I can handle it.
(09:28):
Well, that's the first step intothat place of addiction in your
life where you you're building adeeper hole for yourself.
And the only way out of that, Imean, the only way is to be able
to have conversation, even withyour children and the way you
(09:52):
deal with it, with the truth is,and it's the first step of
recovery, is when you say, areable to say honestly, I can't
stop doing this, but God canhelp me.
And see, part of part of thereason that our children are in
(10:16):
those places of addiction or inthose places of struggle in
their life is because they aretaking on the role of being the
God of their own life.
And how do I know that?
Well, those places in my heartthat I've become bound to in the
past, or even those things Ideal with now, are places where
(10:38):
I am seating myself in the placeof authority in those places.
And when it doesn't matter thatpeople see how I'm broken, it
doesn't matter how much theymention that I'm broken.
But the secret lies in ourtransformation is when we really
(11:01):
are able to say, I can't stopdoing this.
Every addict that I've workedwith has the same thing.
It's the same verbiage that Iwould say is I can change this.
I promise I won't do it again.
It might be a son, it might be adaughter, it it you know, it
(11:23):
might be a relative, it might besomebody that you care about, it
might be a buddy, it might be afriend.
And as long as you're in controlof the output of your life,
because you know, let's face it,most of the a lot of the books
that are written out there ofpeople that have are become uber
(11:43):
successful and they sell thesebooks.
There's a whole lot of humanpower in what they read.
And it's basically, hey man, ifyou can learn to be powerful
like me, you can you can build amulti-dollar million-dollar
business in 90 days if you gothrough my course.
(12:06):
And they'll get a fewtestimonies of people, and they
just build on the the momentumof that, where the source of
your strength, they might beeven praising Jesus, but at the
core of your strength is youknow, that old Sinatra song, I
(12:27):
did it my way.
See, the ultimate sin that wasoffered to Adam and Eve in the
Garden of Eden when God said,You can eat of any tree in the
garden.
There was no limitations, butthe tree of the knowledge of
good and evil, and the day youeat of it, your eyes, you know,
(12:47):
you will surely die.
That's what God said to Adam andEve.
You're not going to be likepartially dead, you are
spiritually dead.
And I don't think theyunderstood even what death was.
They have a limited perspectiveof death because of animals,
they lived for so long.
Creation was different thananything that we had.
(13:10):
Sin had not entered into theworld until Adam and Eve bit
into that fruit that God saidthey do it, and their eyes were
opened.
And basically, the temptationwas for God knows from the devil
who was a talking snake, and theday you eat of that fruit, your
(13:31):
eyes are going to be openbecause God doesn't want you to
know that you can be the boss ofyour own life.
That's my own Englishinterpretation of that.
You get to choose what is goodand what is bad.
Have you noticed in our world,you know, with people, is that
there's there's this value onpeople saying, Well, I have my
(13:53):
own truth.
You have your truth, I have mytruth.
And that that's pretty muchlevel until you start talking
about the truth of Jesus thattrumps all of our personal
truths.
And they may, well, I don'tbelieve in that.
I don't believe in that.
I don't believe that that's asin.
I don't believe that's wrong.
(14:14):
I was working with somebody inthis past couple weeks, and they
said, Well, I don't believe inrecovery.
I think it's a bunch ofnonsense.
I said, Well, it seems as thoughyour entire life, your family,
you've you've lost connectionwith your kids, you've you lost
(14:34):
your relationship with the birthmother, you're struggling at
your job, you're you're sneakingaround and drinking, you're
still going to church, and I'msure you're asking God for
forgiveness for everything.
(14:55):
And you're you're trying to hidehow much you drink, you're
becoming violent with people,and and your family, your your
family is suffering.
And if you put all those thingstogether, the chances are really
high that you you have an in anincurable disease in your soul
(15:20):
that you can't personally healyourself.
And the reason why it's growingin you is because you're in
charge.
And you know, I remember youknow looking at him and and
saying, Do you think you're God?
(15:41):
You think you can actually willyourself to be a different
person?
Well, yeah, you would say, Well,where where when does that
happen?
When have you been able to evermaintain this issue?
Well, maybe maybe there's awhole different way.
(16:02):
Like what?
When you learn how to say thewords, I can't, I need help.
I can't do it, Dad.
I need help.
And to bring your children tothat point where that they're
that brutally honest about wherethey struggle.
That's how I'm gonna I'm gonnatalk and give you a few keys
(16:23):
today about how to not only openup your own life, to give them a
roadmap and of how to be a man,or you know, you as a father,
you know, the way you'remodeling that to your children
will be the starting point ofthem learning how to deal with
(16:45):
those things that want to ownthem.
Because the truth of the matter,and and listen to me when I say
this, that we're all we're allguilty of something, and we're
all addicted to something thatwe need to bring before the Lord
and not only receiveforgiveness, but really receive
(17:09):
the power that we need and thehelp and the community and all
those things around us that weneed to get well.
And that doesn't happen when youthink, well, I I can handle
this.
Those are the last, you know,that that's like the guy who
doesn't went and get into thelifeboat on the Titanic because
(17:33):
he just figures this thing'sunsinkable.
I'm just gonna stay back.
I can handle this.
And he perishes.
And there's that moment, youknow, on the Titanic when, of
course, they didn't have enoughlifeboats, is that you had to
get in that lifeboat if you wona chance to live.
(17:54):
And Jesus is our lifeboat.
It's for you, it's for yourchildren, it's for your family.
And I'm here to tell you God cando extraordinary miracles when
we bring those places in us, andit's really called repentance in
the Bible, where we bring whatwe can't do before the Lord and
(18:18):
say, Lord, I can't fix this.
I need your help.
I can't fix this, and maybe gowith a friend to a recovery
group, and we'll talk some moreabout that.
And so I want to share with youa couple of slides that will
help us kind of navigate this.
Now, one of the verses that Ilove so much, and it's the
(18:45):
internal life of Jesus, is hesays to his disciples, I say to
you, the Son of Man can donothing on his own accord.
In a real way, Jesus was saying,I can do nothing, right?
You know, he determined to notcome and be Superman, where he
(19:07):
just flies in to save the day.
That wasn't what Jesus' planwas.
Jesus' plan was to come andmodel to you and to me what a
dependent life means on hisfather and the power and the
person of the Holy Spirit.
Because if he would have come asa superstar, to where, like some
(19:29):
of the movies portray, the organmusic goes up when he speaks and
all those, you know, kind ofmoments, a dramatic thing that
unfortunately sometimes thechurch has staged, you know, men
of God who are more than human.
They're superhuman and can doall these kinds of things.
(19:52):
And and and we get entertained,and of course we go, and
somebody has a gift of healing,we want to be healed, but it's
not the model of the way Jesusdid things.
Jesus constantly was seeking hisfather for what he was doing
(20:12):
around him, and then hedetermined to only do what his
father was doing.
He laid down his right to beGod.
He was God in the flesh, but hemodeled what it's like to follow
his father, and then ultimatelythen calls us to follow him.
(20:34):
And so the scripture goes on andsays, but he only he only can do
what he sees his father doing.
So one of the one of the secretsof ministering to your children
is asking, we're gonna talkabout questions in a moment, but
(20:55):
it's staying in this place whereyou and and this is gonna make
this is gonna might be a biglight bulb for you, but it's
really asking God what He isdoing with your son and your
daughter versus what you alreadyknow they should be doing.
(21:19):
I was at a news conferencebefore a big event I did with
focus on the family and that andsome other speakers.
We were at an event, and so thethe crowd could ask any
questions they want to ask.
And after about oh, 45 minutes,a parent directed a question at
(21:46):
me, and he said, How can I getmy son to to do it right?
And I mean, he was just jumpingin my grill, you know.
And I said, What why are you somad?
Because he's not turning out theway he was raised.
(22:08):
So he was you know strugglingbecause his son wasn't
listening.
Well, well, why would any sonlisten to a father who speaks
that way?
And I said, Is that the way thatyou talk to your son?
He goes, Well, yeah, it's he'sfrustrating.
Tell me how I can get my son todo what's right, and I said, Can
(22:35):
I ask you a question?
Is that the way God talks toyou?
And he just his shouldersslumped.
No.
Well, how does God the Fatherget you to do what he wants?
(22:55):
And it just stumps him.
And I said, Isn't it doesn't heshow you what to do every day?
And when you do it, you havelike a great day.
Doesn't matter if you'reattacked, or it doesn't matter
if you don't hit all your goals,but you you get this this
four-letter word that is one ofthe most powerful words for us
(23:19):
as followers of Jesus.
It's a word with W I T H.
You move from doing a solitarylife for proving yourself to God
to doing a life with him, andthat's what Jesus came to bring
(23:46):
is with most of the system inthose days was about all the
things that you would do forGod.
If you really, if you're holy,God will then bless you.
If you're you do all thesethings just right, then God will
bless you.
And Jesus came who dideverything right, and when we
(24:08):
learn to let go of the pride ofour victories and even a failure
and an embrace that we can'twithout him, we begin to
discover the life of what itmeans to be with him.
And when you discover that,you'll be a roadmap to teach
(24:31):
your children how to be withGod, too.
And it'll change yourrelationship to them.
It's incredibly, incrediblypowerful.
You know, that verse goes on,and it says, For the father, for
whatever the father does, theson does likewise.
(24:53):
And I just love this.
For the father himself loves theson and shows him all that he
himself is doing.
And so why is it John writingthis?
Because John sees that Jesus didhis life completely different
(25:13):
than all the leaders of the day.
And he did a life that wasn'tabout proving that he was the
Messiah.
He lived, Jesus lived a lifeconnected and only doing what he
saw his father doing.
(25:33):
Even those impossible things,when he was, he discerned that
he was on the way to ending hislife and dying on the cross.
Imagine the level of humilityand obedience and trust that he
had with his father to use thathorrible moment of suffering
that he was going to have toendure for all mankind.
(25:58):
And he didn't run away from it.
Because he learned to trust thatif he follows him and does what
he's doing, there will be allthe grace that he needs to have
to do what God is asking him todo.
I found that so true with my ownchildren.
(26:20):
And so my prayer began to changefrom grow my son up so he's not
so immature, blah, blah, blah,blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah, blah, into Father.
I pray you would speak to my sontoday.
And you would open scripture sohe could discover the things
(26:42):
that you're doing with his life.
Lord, give him that compass ofbeing loved and connected to
you, even when he's broken.
And Father, give him the heartto let me into a story.
And then give me the grace,Lord, to to treat him the same
(27:06):
way you've treated me.
Isn't that powerful?
That's the that's that's theheart that will begin to shift
and open the door to a lost kidor somebody who is there.
Because the the other part ofthis, then when our kids are
(27:29):
struggling, they're alsobattling demonic forces that are
doing everything it can to ownand demonize your children and
separate you.
You know, people will say today,well, there seems to be so much
more wickedness than in Jesus'day.
Well, wicked the devil hasalways been trying to destroy
(27:50):
God's beloved sons anddaughters, always.
Because he got no birthright.
You know, a chief cherubim wasbanished out of heaven.
You know, the book of Ezekieltalks about his fall.
And from that moment on, his warhas been against the sons of
(28:11):
men, against fathers and mothersand families.
And if he can destroy the unitof the mother and father, and
sons and daughters, andblessing, uh, he can get them.
I mean, even the fifthcommandment that God gave was
this profound potential blessingfor your children when they
(28:36):
honor their father and mother,honor your father and mother,
that it may go well with you inthe land and you might find
favor.
It's the only commandment thatis this incredible, that has
this incredible promise writtenright into it, that you get
favor as a child when you honoryour dad and you honor your
(29:01):
mother.
And so the challenge for you andme, is dads, and a few of the
moms who slipped in there is tolive an honorable life so that
they're gonna want to have thesame kind of relationship with
Jesus and the Father that youdo.
(29:23):
And that is incredibly powerful.
Incredibly powerful.
And by the way, that'scompletely possible.
It's been Jesus' plan all along.
I'm just gonna share a few morescriptures tonight that it's for
you to think about.
And here's one that, and here'sanother, you know, here's Paul,
(29:47):
one of the disciples of Jesus.
And it's around this whole issueof learning how to follow and
receive.
For I decided to know nothingamong you except Jesus Christ
and Him crucified.
And I was with you in weaknessand in fear and much trembling.
And my speech and my messagewere not in plausible words of
(30:11):
wisdom, but in a demonstrationof the spirit and of power, so
that your faith might not restin the wisdom of men, but in the
power of God.
I mean, here's Paul in hissecond journey into this area.
The first time they ran him outon a rail because nobody trusted
him, because he was a greatpersecutor of Christians.
(30:33):
And the second time he comes, hecomes different after this long
time out in the desert where Godwas preparing him.
Paul learned how to receive.
Because not only was he going tocome back and ministry in power
differently, but he was going tobe imprisoned.
And he was going to write muchof the New Testament epistles
(30:55):
and letters to the church thatwere going to last for thousands
of years.
So God had to do somethinginside him where he learned that
he was not where he came from,that he became who he learned to
that God wanted him to be.
And so he decided, you know,that, you know, my job isn't to
(31:17):
go up there and wow them with mygreat oratory skills.
He said they came with in muchfear and much trembling.
You know, there's a moment whenyou're, and if you've been a
speaker or shared anything, youknow exactly what I'm about to
say to you.
Is that I've had messages that Igot I got so excited about
(31:44):
preaching them that I was I wasgetting saved all over again in
the writing of the message.
You guys ever do that?
Were you just like, man, you hadan anointed pen.
And then you stand up in frontof that crowd of wherever you
are, and you realize that what'scoming out of your mouth that in
(32:06):
your study was these bold andpowerful words, and you got
visions of big altar calls andthe kingdom of God.
You know, you might have a, youknow, and and yet when you get
up there, you feel like a wetblanket.
I I remember, you know, one ofthe first times I shared about
(32:27):
the blessing of the father to amen's community.
And man, I I ran up there like,man, I was just gonna change the
world.
It's like the old preacher'sson.
You know, he's waiting for histime to preach.
And and yeah, he had gone toBible school, came back.
He's now an assistant pastor andhis dad's big mega church.
(32:50):
And and you know, each Sunday hegoes, Hey, dad, I'm ready, man.
I got a word from God, Daddy.
You want to let me go up thereand preach the word of God?
And so he true story about thiskid.
And his father goes, No, you'renot ready yet.
You're not ready yet.
And a couple weeks go by.
Same kind of thing.
Daddy, I got a word from God.
(33:10):
If you just let me deliver it,it'll hit with great impact.
And father said, No, you're notready yet.
And after bothering his dad nowthe third time, a few weeks
later, he says, All right, son,you just kind of go up there and
go do it.
So he ran up there and grabbedthat pulpit.
And the moment hit him, where hewasn't just uh speaking a great
(33:34):
sermon he had rehearsed.
He was getting ready.
He was going up into a placewhere you had to learn to
listen, no matter what you'vewritten, and to hear from God
for the sake of those peoplethat are in front of you to love
and preach the gospel to.
And great communicators learnhow to do this.
(33:58):
Loud communicators, they don'tcare what people think, they're
just loud and excited aboutsomething.
And went up there and he frozeand he put his head down, so
discouraged, and he walked downto the oh, I just I realized I
had on my slide.
And he walked down, sat down andlike this and all discouraged.
(34:22):
And his daddy leaned in andgoes, son, if you'd have gone up
how you came down, you'd havecame down like you went up.
And that's what happened withme.
Man, I was so excited aboutdoing this first men's retreat.
I got up there to deliver thegoods.
(34:44):
And I just I sucked.
I I I was just I was sodiscouraged and didn't realize
that I was experiencing thespiritual warfare of the men in
that crowd that were listeningto me.
(35:04):
I had made it all about myself.
I was like, I can't believe myjoke, nobody's laughing.
The jokes don't seem, I'm notgetting any feedback.
And for speakers, that's hard.
And so I'm trying to, you know,do my best.
And and I was just, I can't waitto get through this.
I come to the end with probablymy worst ultra call call for
(35:28):
somebody to be saved or toreceive a blessing they never
got from their father.
And I I said something to theeffect, I know there's probably
nobody here that this meantanything to.
I, you know, sort, you know, Istruggled getting this message
out.
But if there's like maybe oneperson, yeah, I just have one
(35:52):
hand.
Even if you, you know, it'slike, even if the janitor in the
back could just give me somelove that this is okay.
And I said, if there's anybodyhere, you know, come on up.
I'd love to pray for you.
And I put my head down and Iclosed my book to walk off of
(36:12):
the stage without looking up.
I heard all this noise andlooked.
And almost the entire room ofmen had was moving forward
weeping.
And I was completely shocked.
I was like, and the Lord justwhispered, He goes, Don't say,
(36:36):
It's not about you, Ed.
I was letting you feel whatevery man in this room feels.
That's the war that these dadscome under all the time.
Where they are marginalized,where they're demonized.
He's just showing this to me.
(36:58):
And the compassion of the Lordgrabs my heart.
And as I ministered and led, Ican't tell you how many of the
couple hundred men that cameforward, hardly anybody in their
seats, weeping and crying, andwatching God the Father through
the Holy Spirit and Jesus turnthese boys in a lot of way who
(37:24):
had horrible dad stories intothe fathers that God had called
them to be with this incredibleblessing.
And see, that's how God changesus to help us with our kids.
We're gonna tie this togetheraround that right now.
Then maybe maybe you thoughtthat you just don't have the
(37:46):
equipment to be a great dad.
Or that your story was toobroken.
Or maybe you're watching and youreally feel like you've messed
up too much.
Well, I gotta I gotta tell you,you know, this one thing I've
(38:11):
learned over and over and overagain is a father now, a
grandfather of of manygrandkids.
It's not about how perfect weare, it's about us learning how
to go to that perfect one and toget what we need by saying the
simple words that are reallypowerful is Father, I can't do
(38:35):
this without you.
Could you show me how to dothis?
Father, I I can't reach my sonright now.
He's angry with me, show me howI can reach my son.
Father, my wife is pushing away,our marriage is lost the
(38:57):
passion, show me what you'redoing with my wife so I can love
her and minister to her.
And so when you approach yourson or your daughter or God in a
way without the answers, andthat you're not the answer for
them.
(39:18):
Really big point, but that Godis, and that you model how to
take your broke your ownbrokenness to God, and you let
your kids in on that, that'llopen the door in their heart
more often than not.
(39:39):
It might take time because youknow, let's face it, a lot of us
have been have been equipped tolisten to sermons and great
teachings, and we translate thatinto the way we talk to our
children with great sermons andgreat teaching.
(40:04):
And the difference of Jesus withsome preachers, not all of them,
was that he was able to say,Follow me as I follow my father.
Follow me as I follow my father.
(40:35):
The son does likewise.
For the father himself loved theson and shows him everything
he's doing.
And the reason why that is rightin the middle of that verse,
it's this amazing nugget.
For the father himself loves theson, and the truth of the
(40:58):
matter, beloved one, is thefather himself loves you and
wants to father you so that youcan be the father your children
need you to be, you can be thegrandfather your grandkids and
(41:18):
your children need you to be.
You can be the husband and loveyour wife the way God has made
you to do that, and what anincredible gift we get as
followers of Jesus, where he notonly calls us to do something we
(41:42):
can't possibly do, but at thatmoment of saying, I can't, Lord,
do this, but you can, and weturn to him that the Holy Spirit
will bring the grace of God andthe anointing we need to empower
you and me to do something wenever saw our fathers do with
(42:07):
our moms.
We never saw we date them indifferent ways than we seen
model.
We've learned to follow and dothings with our children that we
never saw our dad do with us.
And the more we live in thatspace of receiving, the more
(42:28):
impact you will make as afather.
And so next week we're gonnacontinue on more of this, even a
deeper level of this.
And I don't want to let the catout the bag, but before I get
off, before we pray, because I'mgonna pray for you, is that we
(42:49):
have something that we'vereleased that I think would be
an incredible opportunity foryou, for your family, for your
kids, and that's our FatherhoodAcademy.
I'm gonna talk about it at theend, but we've built an academy
with online courses and thatcomes also with live coaching,
(43:09):
with yours truly, to help youbecome the father that maybe
you've always wanted to be, orbe the father that God has
designed you to be.
And so we've named it theFatherhood Academy because when
we allow God to father us,right, the same way he fathered
(43:30):
his son Jesus, that will equipus to father our children in
ways that maybe we have neverseen from any other dad.
And that's incredibly powerful.
And I'm gonna tell you, my lifeis a testament, testament to
being fathered by God.
(43:50):
And I think one of the greatbenefits that God gave me in my
life, that's a benefit now,wasn't a benefit in my early
story, was that my dad, when hehe took off these dog tags and
laid them on the bedside tableas he was going to test his Fury
(44:11):
3 jet in 1956.
Well, I had not been born yet,about a month after his crash,
but he was killed in action.
So I never had a moment with mydad.
I had a stepdad that did hisbest to love me, but I had this
missing piece in me that Ithought I was going to be
(44:33):
forever broken and forgottenbecause I didn't have a dad.
There's a lot of guys I meet whothink that they're gonna be
screwed up forever because theycarry a wound from their dad and
not a blessing.
I'm here to tell you that nomatter how good your dad was, we
all got wounds we carry, becauseno dads are perfect.
(44:53):
But God sent his only son sothat when we learn to totally
receive him, he opens a door tohis father for us that
completely changes our life,where we get refathered by God
Himself.
For I will be a father to you,and you will be my sons and
(45:13):
daughters, says the Lord GodAlmighty.
Second Corinthians 16, verse 9.
That's what God wants, I thinkit might be verse 18.
That's what God's doing.
That's what he did with me,that's what he can do with you.
And the Father Academy is builtaround that premise with our
podcast, with our onlineteaching, with one-on-one
(45:34):
coaching with me is an optionthat you can sign up for.
But to do that, you got to go tomy website and sign up.
And we've discounted it for thefirst hundred new members.
We have a bunch of membersalready around the country.
We got members around thecountry, and all you gotta do is
sign up and uh come hang outwith us.
(45:58):
And I would love an opportunityto just be one of those coaches
in your story to help youconnect more to the father.
Because I know you're watchingthis because you want to be the
best dad you can be, or the bestgrandpa, or you just want to
learn how to love the woman thatyou have, maybe your wife.
(46:18):
This is we have gals that are inour program too.
And so girls carry that samewound too.
So if you're interested, signup.
And we I would love to uh I seeit's gonna throw that up there.
Go to the fatherdifference.com,it'll be right there on the
screen.
So before I get off of here, letme pray for you.
(46:43):
And if you've got prayerrequests that you want to uh
shoot to me or send me an emailand say, I would love to get
with you.
I have some family issues that II don't want to talk about
online, but I I really I needsome help.
If you're interested in our inour coaching program, your first
(47:05):
time with me is free.
And all you gotta do is sign up.
You can get that right at ourwebsite at fatherdifference.com.
And I would love to meet withyou and see if it's a good fit,
if if our services and what wedo can really help you.
Because, you know, I reallybelieve in one thing the Beatles
(47:25):
said, we can get by with thehelp from a friend.
And that's what we do here.
So, Father, I thank you for myfriends that are watching.
I thank you for for the timethey've invested tonight to
learn about how to become thebest dad, or maybe for the gals,
the best mom they could be.
I pray, Lord, that you wouldmeet them where they are in such
(47:48):
a profound way and you wouldbless them with that same
blessing that you're they thateverybody saw that Jesus
carried.
I pray, Lord, that you wouldrestore their relationship with
their children and give them theright kind of heart to be
present enough to help theirchildren see a model of somebody
(48:09):
who's on the way to heaven,who's broken to.
Lord, I pray that you wouldbless them.
I pray that you would heal theirrelationship with their kids.
And I just I ask you, Lord, thatyou would be with them in
profound ways and heal theirfamilies.
In the name of Jesus, I pray.
(48:29):
Amen.
Amen.
One of the services that uh Ioffer is helping you with kids
that won't talk to you.
And uh, I found that the youngpeople, if they like football,
they would they'll meet with afootball player or maybe
somebody other than their dad.
(48:50):
If you want some coaching,that's available.
You can get a hold of me at mywebsite.
Would love to help you.
And uh, that's all I gotta say.
I'm gonna go have a greatdinner, go kiss your sweetheart
after you brush your teeth.
Didn't you do that when you weredating?
Wasn't your breath like crystalclear, evergreen?
(49:14):
Then you get married, you know.
So, anyway, Lord bless you.
I'm so grateful that you're withme.
You're here, your time isimportant to me.
And I hope this is a blessing.
I love your comments.
You can reach out to me onemail, Instagram, Facebook,
YouTube, LinkedIn, Rumble X.
I'm on all of them.
(49:36):
So remember, my friends, it'snever too late for God to do a
miracle in our lives, to be thefather we've always wanted, and
to make us into the fathers andmen that God has destined us to
be.
Well, check out this video atthe end.
Thank you for your support.
If you want to support us, itwould mean the world to us to
(49:59):
reach the men that God's leadingus to.
God bless you.
SPEAKER_00 (50:04):
Dear friends, imagine a world where every
father feels equipped to leadwith faith, love, and purpose.
A world where families thriveand communities grow stronger
because of devoted,Christ-centered fathers.
SPEAKER_01 (50:19):
You know, beloved, that is the vision that God's
put in my heart for every singlefamily.
You know, he is on the move, Ibelieve.
He promises in Malachi thatbefore the great and coming day
of the Lord, he's gonna dosomething profound.
He's gonna turn the hearts offathers back towards their
(50:41):
children.
So the hearts of their childrenwill turn back to their father.
That's what God is doing.
I mean, dads daily, who want tolearn to be better fathers.
Yet many have never been shownhow.
Too many families are beingfractured through bitterness and
with parents and grandparentseven being canceled.
(51:03):
That's why we're launching anonline community to quit and to
be the fathers that God hascalled them to be.
It's more than a program, it's apart of a a movement that God is
already doing to reshapefatherhood.
It's a sacred calling rooted inthe teachings of pride.
(51:24):
And we're calling this theFatherhood Academy, where men
will embark on a journey ofhealing and spiritual
restoration that helps themtransform their family
relationship.
And to make this vision areality, would you consider
partnering with us financiallyas we continue to reach and
(51:48):
disciple every man, dad, andgrandpa that comes our way?
Your donation will help create aripple across the neighborhoods,
communities, you know, andultimately our nature, anchoring
each child, their division andthe unwavering love and guidance
of a devoted dad.
SPEAKER_00 (52:09):
Will you partner with us?
Your gift, whether a one-timedonation or ongoing monthly
support, will help to transformlives.
Together, we can equip fathersand grandfathers to lead with
faith and create a brighter,hopefully future for generations
(52:30):
to come.
Click the link to donate today.
Thank you for believing in thismission and joining us on this
transformative journey.
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