September 17, 2024 • 44 mins
Forgiveness is a powerful tool that transforms families and breaks destructive generational patterns, allowing fathers to model healthy emotional processing for their children.
• Bitterness is like drinking poison meant for someone else, harming ourselves while failing to hurt the target
• Words either kill or give life—fathers must choose which they'll speak to their families
• Forgiveness doesn't mean the other person deserves it, but releases us from the prison of resentment
• Children learn how to process anger and disappointment by watching how their fathers handle conflict
• Political divisions provide opportunities to demonstrate forgiveness toward those with different views
• Asking children for forgiveness teaches them what healthy reconciliation looks like
• The most influential person in a child's life is their father—his example of forgiveness shapes their future
• Forgiving others creates space in our hearts for God's love to flourish
• Breaking generational patterns of bitterness requires intentional decisions to forgive
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Courage and kindness, strength and gentleness,
fortitude and tenderness.
A father, a leader and alifelong teacher, a comforter
(00:35):
and a patient listener, a heroand a world changer A gift from
God above and a world changer agift from God above.
Being a father is a high andholy calling.
It is not only a blessing butalso a stewardship.
(00:56):
Fatherhood is a preciousopportunity and a divine
responsibility, because it isone of the many ways that God
watches over all of us.
A father is a protector and aprovider, a hard worker and a
(01:17):
family man, a role model and afaithful friend.
And so, from all of us to allof you, thank you To the fathers
.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
That's powerful stuff right there.
So glad you're here.
Well, welcome to the FatherDifference.
We come together to you liveevery week on Tuesday night at 5
pm.
We got guys here, we got galssometimes here, and I'm really
excited about just talking withyou tonight and sharing a couple
(02:04):
things.
I'm going to kind of hone in ona single area which is, I think
, just vital for us as fathers.
And so, if you're new to thechannel and you're tuning in on
Instagram or TikTok or somewhereelse, I'm your host, ed
Taney-McGlasson.
(02:24):
Yes, I am sporting a New YorkGiants shirt.
That used to be one of myjerseys that I played with in
the National Football League andI've given my life, the rest of
my life, to helping men becomethe fathers that God's called
them to be, to helping menbecome the fathers that God's
called them to be.
And also on Thursday nights wedo the Difference of Mother
(02:49):
Makes.
Actually, thursday at noon, theDifference of Mother Makes show
, and that's also a live showand we've been getting a lot of
gals there who've been checkingin and learning how to unlock
their men in a great way andserve them and be in their
stories.
And so welcome tonight.
(03:13):
Tonight we're going to talkabout the amazing, incredible,
amazing gift and power offorgiveness and love in a family
, of forgiveness and love in afamily, because when you have
that in place your family you'regoing to guarantee some things
(03:37):
between you and your kids.
That's just crucial.
That's really crucial in theirfuture With your grandkids, with
you.
It all depends on learning thisskill as a man, as a husband,
as a father, learning how toreally forgive and to model that
(03:58):
and to ask for forgiveness.
We've talked a bunch about this, but in light of all the things
that are going on in the worldtoday and just the craziness and
you know, you could say thatthe devil's on a rampage to get
everybody to hate one another,trying to use the election to do
it, trying to do, you know, allthose things that he does.
(04:21):
Things that he does because hisaim is that he hates you if
you're a father or you're a momjoining us, and he wants to
dominate your children and ruintheir lives.
That's his plan.
It's his plan in every singlegeneration.
It's that the devil doesn'tlike that.
(04:44):
You are the object of theaffection of the Lord, god
Almighty, the Father in heaven,and his son Jesus, that he sent
to die in your place and yourability to connect in to that
love and forgiveness for youfrom God, that love and
(05:12):
forgiveness for you from God,but also to live in a place
where you're not carrying aroundstuff, where you get on your—.
I remember my mom would say,man, you're getting on my last
nerve.
It's like she's got this nervebefore the blow up.
Well, that happens to us.
Not sure what that all means,but we're going to talk about
that tonight.
I'm going to share with you justa couple of thoughts and
scriptures about the power ofthis, because, from my seat and
(05:35):
what I get to do as a personalcoach, a family coach, is watch
families come back together andwhen they learn how to really
forgive from the deepest placesinside of them, it changes
things.
Because you don't have to.
You know you turn on the newstoday.
It's just wah, wah, wah.
It's just craziness.
(05:57):
And God's after something,though.
He promises, before the greatand coming day of the Lord, that
he is going to turn the heartsof fathers back to their
children and the hearts of ourchildren back to their father,
and that is absolutely true, andyou know what.
You know what His agenda is.
(06:18):
Now get prepared for this.
I'm going to put on a hat thatyou've probably never seen
before.
I just had this made.
I might have a whole bunch ofthem made for anybody here, and
it's this right here.
And some of you go oh no, not aTrump hat.
No, god wants to make fathersgreat again.
(06:39):
That's what he wants to do.
You know what?
He loves America, but he lovesthe people in America and, more
than anything else, he loves thefathers in America.
He loves the mothers in America, he loves the children in
America, and the point of whatGod's been after and doing is
(07:00):
that he wants to make fathersgreat again, and so, really to
be a great father, one of thethings that you must learn how
to do is not only receive God'sforgiveness for children.
You've got to learn how tobuild a culture of forgiveness.
(07:23):
Now, if you're tuning in hereon Instagram or somewhere else,
no, this is—it looks like atrumpet, but I've stolen the
slogan because it just—God wantsto make fathers great again.
(07:46):
He wants to make you, my friend, great again, to where you feel
like you're handling your kidsand your life and your family
and yet even loving mama the wayyou need to.
So we're going to get rightinto this and talk about just a
couple of things that we got tomaster and learn to do.
(08:07):
Or bitterness—and we all knowwhat bitterness is like because
we all live with it at times—canpoison the water of our kids.
It can poison their life andthey learn bitterness.
And, as a matter of fact, I wasdealing with somebody this week
in a coaching appointment andthe father actually even took
(08:29):
his own life Devastating a thing.
And boy, those kids are nowhaving to navigate all of this
stuff.
But the one thing that happenedin this man was he didn't know
how to really get rid of thebitterness that started with his
own daddy and that transferrednow right into his family, and
(08:55):
it ultimately caused him, justin shame and remorse and the
regret of his life, to end upending his life, and that is
just a horrible, horrible thingfor him.
But the Bible says it this way,and that is the Bible says words
(09:19):
kill.
How many of you know that'strue.
But words also give life.
Let me know that's true.
But words also give life.
They are either poison or fruityou choose.
God puts that on you, puts thaton me, matter of fact.
We're in this chapter, righthere, if you've not gotten this
(09:42):
yet, I invite you to get a copy.
You can get a digital versionright away online or you can go
to our ministry atthefatherdifferencecom and pick
up a copy.
I think they've sold out onAmazon.
There might be some more there,but it's from my book, the
Father You've Always Wanted.
And here's the issue Words dokill and words do give life.
(10:02):
We get to choose Poison, orthat.
I remember one time, kind of.
You know thinking about youknow bitterness, and I read
somewhere that when you'rebitter towards somebody and
you're angry and you'rerehearsing what they did in your
head, it's kind of like makingpoison to kill them.
(10:25):
But you drink a little bitevery day and so it consumes you
.
You carry it your whole life.
I've met veterans who, you know, get stuck many times in
homelessness or in isolationbecause they're bitter.
They were hurt, they weredisappointed by the government,
(10:47):
by people, or sometimes they'rebitter against themselves
because they survived and theirbuddies didn't, and so that
thing just eats them away.
But the Scripture says here youknow, words kill or words give
life.
That's the power that you and Ihave with our mouth what you
(11:13):
say, what you say to yourchildren, what you say to your
wife, your friends, what you sayto yourself when no one's
around?
And I found at times when I'mreally kind of critical out
there with my children, when Iam out there and read the hat,
(11:34):
if you're just signing on, itsays make fathers great again.
So when you're drinking that,poison yourself and you're
talking to yourself all day longbecause you feel broken, you're
(11:54):
angry, you're disappointed,you're in shame.
And then your kids come around,what do you?
Got in a tank to speak intotheir life.
That's what happens to us, butit doesn't have to stay that way
.
You know.
One of the true things is thatyou know, the Bible says that
God is love.
Right, we all know that God islove.
(12:16):
When we take up a permanentresident in the life of love, we
live in God of love.
We live in God Because the onlyway to really love—and the
Bible says that we love becausehe first loved us—is when we
receive it for ourselves andwe're going to have it to live
in our families.
And so we live in God and Godlives in us.
(12:38):
This way, love has the run ofthe house, becomes at home and
matures in us.
That's exactly what we wantlove to do, don't you?
And if anybody boasts, theBible says in John 4, I love God
and goes right on hating hisbrother or sister, thinking
(13:00):
nothing of it, he's a liar.
And if he won't love the personhe can see, how can he say he
loves the God he can't see?
Oh man, wow, what a zinger.
So true.
If we don't love the people wedo see, how can we say we love
(13:22):
God that we don't see?
Think about all the crazypolitical diatribes going on
today, everybody fighting fortheir opinion to be heard, and
the viciousness and thewickedness.
And you know it's like we'vegot to stay in that place in our
(13:44):
life.
And really you know because, bythe way, this election is
really important, but it's notnearly as important as you learn
to be a loving, present father.
See, when you are a greatfather, your children are going
to live a different kind of life.
(14:04):
We can have a screwed upcountry, we can have an America
that is totally screwed up, butif your children have a great
father, guess what happens?
They become bigger than thewickedness that's around them.
That's one of the benefits ofyou being a present father in
(14:25):
the life of your children isthat the wickedness is trying to
encroach on your family andthose things that you worry
about that are happening in theworld and every generation says,
boy, it's never been this evilpeople that have followed Jesus,
it've never been this wicked.
Oh, I beg to differ.
(14:46):
Every generation has to facethis.
We all think the end is coming,but see, here's the truth of
the matter.
The most influential person inthe life of your children is you
, mom and dad, and especiallyfathers.
They love their mamas, but theylearn how to forgive many times
(15:11):
by watching how their dads dealwith anger.
They learn how to deal withbitterness by how you deal with
it.
What do you do?
Do you come home?
And kind of, you know, Iremember coming home from work
and, you know, went out to afootball player and I tell my
wife just give me some space, Ineed to relax a little bit.
(15:35):
Oh boy, that didn't go oververy well.
And you know dealing withplaying football and making the
teams and all the injuries andall the stuff I'm being served.
I'm, you know, dealing withplaying football and making the
teams and all the injuries andall the stuff I'm being served.
I'm, you know, serving mybosses all day long and doing
all that.
But in the midst of, you know,coming home, I made it all about
me and my wife has waited allday long for a relationship and
(16:00):
I just kind of told her, youknow, back off Even my kids,
they'd run to the door anddaddy's home and after they come
, running towards me, man, Itell you what, what a a powerful
moment that could have been forme as a young dad.
And I was like, hey, leave thatalone, he's busy, he's got to
(16:21):
get stuff done.
And they started feelinginvisible.
They started feeling that I waspushing them away.
Well, that that breaks theheart of your kids, right,
because that's not what thebible calls us to do.
Right?
And and part of you know thisscripture that he says if he
won't love the person that hecan see how he is he going to
(16:44):
love God, he can't see.
You, my friend, are the onewho's teaching your kids about
forgiveness.
When I realized that it set meback on my heels, I went oh my
goodness, I really am teachingmy children about that.
(17:07):
And so, in a real way, you canchange the way your future
family and your grandkids aregoing to deal with you and
they're going to have issues.
And I mean I got 13 grandkids.
And I mean I got 13 grandkidsand I remember, you know, I
remember a couple of Christmasesago and you know, when we have
(17:36):
Christmas over here, my wifespends months wrapping presents
and our grandkids tear intothose presents and what took her
months to wrap them and shopand get them all.
She's like Mrs Santa.
Everything was unlocked withinseconds, minutes, and they
unwrapped and next thing thefighting was happening Because
(18:03):
somebody got something thatsomebody else wanted and just
that human nature that we allcarry just starts coming out.
And I remember one time and Iwas going to say something but
my daughter, jessica, goes overand says okay, raleigh, you need
to go ask your sister forforgiveness.
You hit her because you didn'tget the present you wanted.
And he looks up at me, he looksup at his dad, it's going back
(18:30):
and forth and he walks over andhe hugs his sister and says
Sorry, forgive me.
I want to tell you that momentwas so powerful for me because I
realized that that momentstarted when I learned how to
really forgive and let go of thehurt.
(18:52):
And we all have hurt.
How many of you got hurt?
We all do so.
The next slide.
I want to share with you is thecommand that we have in Christ
is really blunt.
Loving God includes lovingpeople.
You've got to love both.
You've even got to love peoplethat are the opposite political
(19:14):
party than you, because I don'tknow about you.
It's really easy to bypass thefact that people who think
differently than you or lookdifferently than you.
It's so easy when bitterness isa fruit in your life Remember
(19:39):
we talked about bitterness inthe beginning To just completely
demonize that other person.
And so what do you do?
After you call somebody Hitler?
What's the next level?
Well, it's murder.
You're already murdered in yourheart and I mean it's just
(20:01):
crazy stuff.
Our ex-president got somebodytried to take him out again.
We're those things.
And yet there's a responsibilitythat you know.
Think about all the words thathave been spoken and think about
, just with us and in our ownlives, how angry we get with
(20:24):
people lives.
How angry we get with people,especially when they believe
something differently than we door have a different political
party.
See number one.
They don't cease being humanbeings.
They're still somebody that Godloves, but we don't like them
and many times we don't lovethem and many times we let that
(20:46):
bitterness get on us and theproblem is it leaks into our
families and gets on ourfamilies and it causes
incredible destruction.
And I haven't spoke muchdirectly into this, but I can't
tell you how many coaching timesI've had just dealing with the
(21:06):
issue of political hatred towhere it's.
You know, if you're a Democrator a Republican and you believe
something differently, or anindependent, the result of that
conversation, if that personfeels as though you're rejecting
what they believe, it becomes awar.
(21:28):
Families have been destroyedbecause of all this craziness.
Even the woke ideology and allthese things that really you
know quite honestly, is from thepit of hell.
It's from a place of just.
You know.
It comes from a group of peoplein the world who don't know who
they are, who don't know thelove of God, who don't know what
(21:52):
it's like to be clear about whoGod's made you to be and to do
it without shame and disgraceand fighting and manipulating
and demonizing.
When does all that end?
When does it end to where youknow families can be united?
Well, let me tell you how itgets there.
It starts with you, dad.
(22:13):
God wants to make fathers greatagain.
That's His commitment.
It's one of the reasons he sentHis Son Jesus?
Because he wanted to get Hisfathers back.
He wanted to get His mothersback.
He wanted to give His familiesback and wanted to get his
mothers back.
He wanted to give his familiesback.
And so, if you've got kids thatare sideways, I'm going to
share a few more things with youand then we're going to pray.
(22:34):
But love prospers Say this outloud, it's just so powerful.
My friend, jimmy Edwards, whomI love so much, gave this to me.
It's just so powerful.
My friend, jimmy Edwards, whomI love so much, gave this to me.
It's in Proverbs Love prosperswhen a fault is forgiven.
(22:55):
Love prospers when a fault isforgiven.
Wow, it goes on.
But dwelling on it separatesclose friends.
We lost a friend because of ahurt issues.
(23:21):
You know most of the kids thatare going to junior, high and
high school.
They don't know how to forgive.
They know how to get even.
They know how to talk.
They know how to you knowshadow bomb somebody online and
make fun of them, talk them down.
They know how to destroy otherpeople.
(23:42):
Where did they learn it from?
Is it just social media's fault?
I'd like to blame social media.
Social media is actually justyou know, a place where kids
come with who they really are,and it can ramp up the anger and
(24:03):
the angst between people.
But who do they learnforgiveness from?
But would your kids say, man,my dad prospers in love because
he's always forgiving people, hedoesn't hold grudges, he
doesn't get even, he loves.
(24:23):
Because here's the truth Timeto hydrate.
Can you really get even withsomebody who's hurt you?
Can you get even?
Can you make them suffer enoughand see?
(24:45):
So that's why Christ did whathe did, because he wants to
change something in us.
He wants to break something inus that without Christ, we go to
naturally, and that is, geteven to make that other pay for
what they've done.
The problem is it doesn't stopas long as bitterness has taken
(25:10):
root.
Has bitterness grabbed yourheart at any level?
Maybe it's time to forgive.
Don't work on.
Well, one day I'm going toforgive them.
Well, guess what?
You'll be bitter the entiretime and you're going to teach
your children it's okay to havea lifetime of hurt and separate
(25:30):
yourself from your cousins andyour uncles because something he
did to me when I was a kid.
How many times have you heardthat story?
Matter of fact, they've takenbitterness.
It's this current culture oflost kids who've gone to
colleges with lost professors,where they're now blaming their
(25:52):
life on what happened hundredsof years ago.
They want reparations for thehurt.
Can you really get it?
Can you really make enoughmoney to feel better?
Some people go oh yeah, yougive me a couple million, I'll
feel a whole lot better.
Well, no, you'll feel betteruntil you run out of money, but
(26:15):
you're still that cranky personthat's there.
See, the Bible says it reallyclearly get rid of all
bitterness, rage, anger, alongwith every form of malice.
We've looked at this versebefore, but I just feel
compelled tonight to talk to youthat listen with all your heart
(26:36):
.
Guard your family frombitterness, rage, anger and
everything.
And the way you do it, youfirst deal with it in yourself
bitterness, rage, anger andeverything.
And the way you do it, youfirst deal with it in yourself.
I mean, how many of you just,you're still angry by what
somebody did, a friend mighthave done, somebody might have
(26:59):
done in your life, and you'vegot to get rid of it.
How do you get rid of it?
There's only one way you forgive.
Oh, wait a minute.
That can't be that easy.
Well, it's not easy, becauseChrist died on the cross not
only for your sins that youwould do.
He also died on the cross forall the hurt of other people's
(27:23):
sins that they would do to you.
And so when you choose toforgive, it changes everything.
When you chose to receive God'smercy and he saved your life
and you were born again life andyou were born again.
(27:51):
When you did that, you now areheld to the same standard of
forgiving the way you wereforgiven.
Remember that scripture earlierthat we're to forgive the same
way that God forgives us.
That's completely andultimately.
Yeah, you say, well, it's hardto do that.
Well, of course it's hard to dothat because there's places in
our flesh that want to get even.
We want to hit back, we want todo it.
(28:13):
And it's interesting in theNational Football League, it's
the guy who throws the secondpunch that ends up getting the
flag.
Have you ever noticed thatSomebody throws a punch and then
the guy gets mad and he goesafter the flag?
Have you ever noticed thatSomebody throws a punch and then
the guy gets mad and he goesafter the guy, and the guy who
threw the second punch gets hit?
And there's only one way to beable to deal with that in life
(28:37):
is understanding that when Jesusdied on a cross, he took all
the hits that you would take too.
He took all the sin that wouldbe done against you from other
people, all the wickedness, allthe things that he took.
It all on him, all of it.
There was nothing left thatwasn't poured out For all of
(28:58):
eternity.
Up to that moment, and foreternity, everything, every sin
that would ever be done, wascovered by Christ on the cross,
so that when you get smacked inthe face, you realize that Jesus
took that too.
When you get mistreated, hetook that too.
When you get talked about, hetook that too.
(29:21):
When you know that, when you getthat, then why wouldn't I give
mercy and forgiveness tosomebody who is just as broken
as me?
See, that's the second part.
It's really staying in touchwith the fact that you are just
as broken as that person that'shurting you, or that brother who
(29:41):
said that or did that, or thatbrother who said that or did
that.
And when you live in that placeof being in touch with God's
mercy for you and receiving itbecause you asked for
forgiveness, oh, wow, there'snobody you can't forgive, and
(30:02):
not only that.
One other slide Is theresomebody that you need to
forgive right now, or maybesomebody you need to ask
forgiveness from?
And so that's what we dobusiness here, we don't just
talk about, oh, that would begood if we forgive.
(30:24):
We want to do it because theHoly Spirit has drawn you here
tonight, whether you recognizeit or not, because he loves you
and he wants your family andyour children to be healthy,
your children to be healthy, andthe only way that's going to
happen is when we, as fathers,to be the fathers of God's call,
(30:56):
because the way he makes usgreat again is that we model
forgiving, we model givingforgiveness and asking for
forgiveness.
Giving forgiveness and askingfor forgiveness yeah, that's one
thing that I didn't get tomention.
That's just part of this, andthat is when we go to our
children to ask for forgiveness.
It teaches them what it lookslike and I want to tell you I
(31:24):
don't remember you know itwasn't modeled much of my house
where my, my stepdad, cause, mydad was killed in action.
That's forgiveness a lot.
I knew he felt bad when he didthings.
He did the best he could.
He was just a amazing leaderand man, a naval officer,
(31:47):
decorated submarine commander,and he was the Navy way, but I
know he loved me, he was there.
You know in his life that wehad some great conversations
about really the power of askingyour kids for forgiveness, to
(32:11):
some of which he did, and toothers he didn't quite get there
, but it sets them free.
It set them free and it sets usfree when we're not making
bitter fruit and destroying ourfamilies.
And so the way to deal with thisis I want you to think who do
(32:33):
you need to forgive?
I mean, who's hurt you, thatwhen you see them, you walk away
in the room, you just walkanother way.
Or when you think about them,you can't bless them, because
you know when you've forgivensomebody, you really, at the
(32:55):
depth of your heart, you wantGod to bless them, and so you
might say, well, they don'tdeserve it.
Of course they don't deserve it.
None of us, we don't deserve it.
Of course they don't deserve it.
None of us.
We didn't deserve it While wewere still dead in our sin.
Romans 5.8 says Christ died foryou and me, and so if God died
(33:16):
for us when we were ugly and wewere ugly towards Him we should
do the same.
We should forgive when peopleare ugly towards us, even people
who don't agree with uspolitically which is, you know,
(33:36):
first and foremost, right beforeus in the church Because you
know bitterness won't help youeven vote in this next election.
You should—somebody would saywell, how are you going to vote?
(33:57):
Well, I'll tell you how I'mgoing to vote.
I'm voting for—because rightnow, the government still gives
us the ability to get to choosein our country, and if you're
outside the country, youprobably have a similar
government Maybe not, but itgives us the ability.
The civil authority gives usthe ability to choose a
(34:19):
president, or senators, orcongressmen, et cetera.
That's really a sacred right.
I know this.
What's astounding is only 40%of the Church of Jesus votes,
and yet they probably allcomplain when it's not going
well, like we all do.
And so part of how I'm facingthis whole thing is looking at
(34:44):
both candidates and asking justa simple question from a grandpa
which candidate is going tohelp my family to stay safe,
keep us out of wars, going toenable me to be the best father
and grandfather I can be?
(35:05):
Because we're not choosing apope in this election.
We're not choosing a spiritualleader.
We're choosing a civil leaderwho is appointed with delegated
(35:25):
authority that God backs up whenthe votes are counted.
And our job is to choose andreally think through the issues.
And I just want to help youwith something.
You've got to let go of yourbitterness if you hate one of
(35:45):
the candidates either way,because when I'm bitter at
somebody I don't think straightand it's really easy, it comes
right out of my mouth.
I got to go.
Lord forgive me.
So the issue is it's notwhether or not you like the
candidate, but which candidateis running for president is
going to give us the best shotat having great families.
(36:07):
That's for life.
That's a big thing.
You know the babies are knownby God in the womb.
You know, before their firstheartbeat.
He knew way from the beginning.
That's a big issue with me.
I care about because I careabout the baby.
I want every right for moms andgals.
(36:30):
You know it is her body, butthat baby has its own body.
I care about that deeply.
And so some of those issues arevery polarizing.
They might be, but they'reimportant to God and you take
all those things you're thinkingabout with the litmus test of
what the Bible says and you makethe best choice you can.
(36:50):
You'll never be perfect Because, at the end of the day, no
matter who is elected, JesusChrist is still King.
His kingdom is coming.
The book of Revelation lets usknow that his kingdom will
succeed, the devil will bedefeated, the church will be
(37:18):
glorified and we're going tospend forever and ever in heaven
.
So the only way to do that isyou've got to get rid of your
bitterness.
So you've got to model thateven with your kids.
When you're talking aboutpolitics, you listen, you learn,
even if they want to bedifferent than you.
But more than anything else inthe midst of this, I'm going to
challenge you with all that.
(37:38):
You've got to keep your heartopen, to listen to God and to
forgive people, all of them.
Forgive them, because people doa lot of stupid stuff,
especially in the governmentright now.
A lot of stupid stuff, andguess what I do?
A lot of stupid stuff we all do.
(38:01):
We're all broken and we allneed a Savior, and so, if our
heart's open, you never know whoyou get to share Christ with.
You never know who's watchingyou, but the number one audience
is watching you beloved is yourkids.
And so answer that question Italked about earlier.
Is there somebody in your lifethat you need to forgive or to
(38:24):
ask forgiveness from?
You might hate a whole partypolitically.
You got to get rid of thatbecause you're not big enough in
your life to get rid of, tohide that bitterness.
It's going to salt everythingin your life and it just would
(38:45):
be devastating.
And if you want some help beforewe get off, before we pray I
want to pray with you is that Ihave a series that I'm doing
right now.
We're going through this book,the Father You've Always Wanted,
and we have a ministry calledthe Father Difference, and our
ministry is designed to helpequip you and to give you every
(39:07):
tool that you need in your lifeto be able to really live the
life that God wants you to live.
And if you do that as a man, asa father, it's going to make
you a great dad, because you'regoing to be the kind of dad and
father that your kids are goingto want to be like.
And man, that's a powerful daywhen that happens.
So go to my website atthefatherdifferencecom.
(39:30):
If you can get this book.
There's a QR code there and youcan go to our website at
thefatherdifferencecom.
There's a lot of stuff there.
It's a free, daily devotionalplace to serve you.
We're here.
But all that to say, I want topray for you.
So I want you just to you know,if you're driving, don't close
(39:51):
your eyes, but I want you toopen your, I want you to put
your hands in front of you and Iwant you to let the Lord show
you.
I'm going to pray for you, he'sgoing to show you.
I want you to let the Lord putin your hands maybe a name or
(40:12):
somebody that you really hasn'tforgiven yet.
Maybe it's been years, maybeit's been 20, 30 years, and you
know you've got a problem.
When you say I just can'tforgive them, of course you can.
God forgave you for much worse.
So I'm going to pray for youand then I'll lead you in this
(40:33):
prayer.
Father, I pray for my friendsright now and I pray, lord, that
you would put in their hands sothey could see which they
already know, but those peoplethat they have held in a prison
of their anger, maybe for years.
Maybe it's a dad, a mom, anaunt, an uncle, somebody who's
(40:58):
abusive.
I pray, lord, that you would,right now, you would unlock that
prison gate of their heartthat's causing them, without
them even knowing it, to beingbitter, and I pray, father,
right now, that they could saythese words and just say,
(41:19):
whoever that person's name is,just say it out loud and just
say I choose to forgive youbecause Christ has forgiven me.
Just say those words overwhoever that is Maybe there's a
(41:41):
lot of names and there's notenough time tonight.
I want you to clear the decksthis week and let the Holy
Spirit bring up people that havegotten real estate in your
heart and bitterness has sort ofsat in there, and because when
(42:01):
you have bitterness in yourheart, you know what happens.
You don't have a place in yourheart for God's love.
So, father, I pray for myfriends.
I'm so grateful they're here,I'm so grateful for their
support and I pray right nowthat your Holy Spirit, I pray
you'd fall on them, you wouldbless them.
(42:22):
Holy Spirit, I pray you'd fallon them, you would bless them,
you would open their hearts tocome and get the ultimate
healing of letting go ofbitterness and hurt that many
have carried for far too long.
People are going to watch thisvideo long after this election
is over and I pray, lord, forthose that are watching, that
(42:43):
your heart would stay in thisplace of forgiving, no matter
what has happened, so that theirchildren see this and the model
of forgiveness is now passeddown from dad or mom to son or
daughter, down from dad or momto son or daughter, and their
(43:08):
children and their children'schildren live in this place of
blessing and love withoutbitterness ruling their family.
I pray in the name of Jesus, aGod, that you would break any
generational patterns ofbitterness from grandfathers to
sons to sons to daughters.
In the name of Jesus, lord,unlock forgiveness in them for
(43:32):
the sake of their family, theirchildren, and Lord, blow their
minds by the relationships andbegin to grow.
In the matchless name of Jesus,I pray Amen, amen.
Thanks for hanging with me.
I'm so grateful that you'rehere tonight and I'm speaking to
(43:53):
you from my studio here.
It's one of my paintings here,the mountain that the people of
Israel saw, mount Sinai.
And yet God, you know God fromthat mountain gave us the Ten
Commandments and all theseincredible promises in the Bible
so that you and I could live alife and be loved and to love
(44:17):
other people.
So remember, it's never toolate to change your whole family
story.
You be the change agent.
In the name of Jesus, god blessyou.
Courage and kindness, strength and gentleness,
fortitude and tenderness.
A father, a leader and alifelong teacher, a comforter
(00:35):
and a patient listener, a heroand a world changer A gift from
God above and a world changer agift from God above.
Being a father is a high andholy calling.
It is not only a blessing butalso a stewardship.
(00:56):
Fatherhood is a preciousopportunity and a divine
responsibility, because it isone of the many ways that God
watches over all of us.
A father is a protector and aprovider, a hard worker and a
(01:17):
family man, a role model and afaithful friend.
And so, from all of us to allof you, thank you To the fathers
.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
That's powerful stuff right there.
So glad you're here.
Well, welcome to the FatherDifference.
We come together to you liveevery week on Tuesday night at 5
pm.
We got guys here, we got galssometimes here, and I'm really
excited about just talking withyou tonight and sharing a couple
(02:04):
things.
I'm going to kind of hone in ona single area which is, I think
, just vital for us as fathers.
And so, if you're new to thechannel and you're tuning in on
Instagram or TikTok or somewhereelse, I'm your host, ed
Taney-McGlasson.
(02:24):
Yes, I am sporting a New YorkGiants shirt.
That used to be one of myjerseys that I played with in
the National Football League andI've given my life, the rest of
my life, to helping men becomethe fathers that God's called
them to be, to helping menbecome the fathers that God's
called them to be.
And also on Thursday nights wedo the Difference of Mother
(02:49):
Makes.
Actually, thursday at noon, theDifference of Mother Makes show
, and that's also a live showand we've been getting a lot of
gals there who've been checkingin and learning how to unlock
their men in a great way andserve them and be in their
stories.
And so welcome tonight.
(03:13):
Tonight we're going to talkabout the amazing, incredible,
amazing gift and power offorgiveness and love in a family
, of forgiveness and love in afamily, because when you have
that in place your family you'regoing to guarantee some things
(03:37):
between you and your kids.
That's just crucial.
That's really crucial in theirfuture With your grandkids, with
you.
It all depends on learning thisskill as a man, as a husband,
as a father, learning how toreally forgive and to model that
(03:58):
and to ask for forgiveness.
We've talked a bunch about this, but in light of all the things
that are going on in the worldtoday and just the craziness and
you know, you could say thatthe devil's on a rampage to get
everybody to hate one another,trying to use the election to do
it, trying to do, you know, allthose things that he does.
(04:21):
Things that he does because hisaim is that he hates you if
you're a father or you're a momjoining us, and he wants to
dominate your children and ruintheir lives.
That's his plan.
It's his plan in every singlegeneration.
It's that the devil doesn'tlike that.
(04:44):
You are the object of theaffection of the Lord, god
Almighty, the Father in heaven,and his son Jesus, that he sent
to die in your place and yourability to connect in to that
love and forgiveness for youfrom God, that love and
(05:12):
forgiveness for you from God,but also to live in a place
where you're not carrying aroundstuff, where you get on your—.
I remember my mom would say,man, you're getting on my last
nerve.
It's like she's got this nervebefore the blow up.
Well, that happens to us.
Not sure what that all means,but we're going to talk about
that tonight.
I'm going to share with you justa couple of thoughts and
scriptures about the power ofthis, because, from my seat and
(05:35):
what I get to do as a personalcoach, a family coach, is watch
families come back together andwhen they learn how to really
forgive from the deepest placesinside of them, it changes
things.
Because you don't have to.
You know you turn on the newstoday.
It's just wah, wah, wah.
It's just craziness.
(05:57):
And God's after something,though.
He promises, before the greatand coming day of the Lord, that
he is going to turn the heartsof fathers back to their
children and the hearts of ourchildren back to their father,
and that is absolutely true, andyou know what.
You know what His agenda is.
(06:18):
Now get prepared for this.
I'm going to put on a hat thatyou've probably never seen
before.
I just had this made.
I might have a whole bunch ofthem made for anybody here, and
it's this right here.
And some of you go oh no, not aTrump hat.
No, god wants to make fathersgreat again.
(06:39):
That's what he wants to do.
You know what?
He loves America, but he lovesthe people in America and, more
than anything else, he loves thefathers in America.
He loves the mothers in America, he loves the children in
America, and the point of whatGod's been after and doing is
(07:00):
that he wants to make fathersgreat again, and so, really to
be a great father, one of thethings that you must learn how
to do is not only receive God'sforgiveness for children.
You've got to learn how tobuild a culture of forgiveness.
(07:23):
Now, if you're tuning in hereon Instagram or somewhere else,
no, this is—it looks like atrumpet, but I've stolen the
slogan because it just—God wantsto make fathers great again.
(07:46):
He wants to make you, my friend, great again, to where you feel
like you're handling your kidsand your life and your family
and yet even loving mama the wayyou need to.
So we're going to get rightinto this and talk about just a
couple of things that we got tomaster and learn to do.
(08:07):
Or bitterness—and we all knowwhat bitterness is like because
we all live with it at times—canpoison the water of our kids.
It can poison their life andthey learn bitterness.
And, as a matter of fact, I wasdealing with somebody this week
in a coaching appointment andthe father actually even took
(08:29):
his own life Devastating a thing.
And boy, those kids are nowhaving to navigate all of this
stuff.
But the one thing that happenedin this man was he didn't know
how to really get rid of thebitterness that started with his
own daddy and that transferrednow right into his family, and
(08:55):
it ultimately caused him, justin shame and remorse and the
regret of his life, to end upending his life, and that is
just a horrible, horrible thingfor him.
But the Bible says it this way,and that is the Bible says words
(09:19):
kill.
How many of you know that'strue.
But words also give life.
Let me know that's true.
But words also give life.
They are either poison or fruityou choose.
God puts that on you, puts thaton me, matter of fact.
We're in this chapter, righthere, if you've not gotten this
(09:42):
yet, I invite you to get a copy.
You can get a digital versionright away online or you can go
to our ministry atthefatherdifferencecom and pick
up a copy.
I think they've sold out onAmazon.
There might be some more there,but it's from my book, the
Father You've Always Wanted.
And here's the issue Words dokill and words do give life.
(10:02):
We get to choose Poison, orthat.
I remember one time, kind of.
You know thinking about youknow bitterness, and I read
somewhere that when you'rebitter towards somebody and
you're angry and you'rerehearsing what they did in your
head, it's kind of like makingpoison to kill them.
(10:25):
But you drink a little bitevery day and so it consumes you
.
You carry it your whole life.
I've met veterans who, you know, get stuck many times in
homelessness or in isolationbecause they're bitter.
They were hurt, they weredisappointed by the government,
(10:47):
by people, or sometimes they'rebitter against themselves
because they survived and theirbuddies didn't, and so that
thing just eats them away.
But the Scripture says here youknow, words kill or words give
life.
That's the power that you and Ihave with our mouth what you
(11:13):
say, what you say to yourchildren, what you say to your
wife, your friends, what you sayto yourself when no one's
around?
And I found at times when I'mreally kind of critical out
there with my children, when Iam out there and read the hat,
(11:34):
if you're just signing on, itsays make fathers great again.
So when you're drinking that,poison yourself and you're
talking to yourself all day longbecause you feel broken, you're
(11:54):
angry, you're disappointed,you're in shame.
And then your kids come around,what do you?
Got in a tank to speak intotheir life.
That's what happens to us, butit doesn't have to stay that way
.
You know.
One of the true things is thatyou know, the Bible says that
God is love.
Right, we all know that God islove.
(12:16):
When we take up a permanentresident in the life of love, we
live in God of love.
We live in God Because the onlyway to really love—and the
Bible says that we love becausehe first loved us—is when we
receive it for ourselves andwe're going to have it to live
in our families.
And so we live in God and Godlives in us.
(12:38):
This way, love has the run ofthe house, becomes at home and
matures in us.
That's exactly what we wantlove to do, don't you?
And if anybody boasts, theBible says in John 4, I love God
and goes right on hating hisbrother or sister, thinking
(13:00):
nothing of it, he's a liar.
And if he won't love the personhe can see, how can he say he
loves the God he can't see?
Oh man, wow, what a zinger.
So true.
If we don't love the people wedo see, how can we say we love
(13:22):
God that we don't see?
Think about all the crazypolitical diatribes going on
today, everybody fighting fortheir opinion to be heard, and
the viciousness and thewickedness.
And you know it's like we'vegot to stay in that place in our
(13:44):
life.
And really you know because, bythe way, this election is
really important, but it's notnearly as important as you learn
to be a loving, present father.
See, when you are a greatfather, your children are going
to live a different kind of life.
(14:04):
We can have a screwed upcountry, we can have an America
that is totally screwed up, butif your children have a great
father, guess what happens?
They become bigger than thewickedness that's around them.
That's one of the benefits ofyou being a present father in
(14:25):
the life of your children isthat the wickedness is trying to
encroach on your family andthose things that you worry
about that are happening in theworld and every generation says,
boy, it's never been this evilpeople that have followed Jesus,
it've never been this wicked.
Oh, I beg to differ.
(14:46):
Every generation has to facethis.
We all think the end is coming,but see, here's the truth of
the matter.
The most influential person inthe life of your children is you
, mom and dad, and especiallyfathers.
They love their mamas, but theylearn how to forgive many times
(15:11):
by watching how their dads dealwith anger.
They learn how to deal withbitterness by how you deal with
it.
What do you do?
Do you come home?
And kind of, you know, Iremember coming home from work
and, you know, went out to afootball player and I tell my
wife just give me some space, Ineed to relax a little bit.
(15:35):
Oh boy, that didn't go oververy well.
And you know dealing withplaying football and making the
teams and all the injuries andall the stuff I'm being served.
I'm, you know, dealing withplaying football and making the
teams and all the injuries andall the stuff I'm being served.
I'm, you know, serving mybosses all day long and doing
all that.
But in the midst of, you know,coming home, I made it all about
me and my wife has waited allday long for a relationship and
(16:00):
I just kind of told her, youknow, back off Even my kids,
they'd run to the door anddaddy's home and after they come
, running towards me, man, Itell you what, what a a powerful
moment that could have been forme as a young dad.
And I was like, hey, leave thatalone, he's busy, he's got to
(16:21):
get stuff done.
And they started feelinginvisible.
They started feeling that I waspushing them away.
Well, that that breaks theheart of your kids, right,
because that's not what thebible calls us to do.
Right?
And and part of you know thisscripture that he says if he
won't love the person that hecan see how he is he going to
(16:44):
love God, he can't see.
You, my friend, are the onewho's teaching your kids about
forgiveness.
When I realized that it set meback on my heels, I went oh my
goodness, I really am teachingmy children about that.
(17:07):
And so, in a real way, you canchange the way your future
family and your grandkids aregoing to deal with you and
they're going to have issues.
And I mean I got 13 grandkids.
And I mean I got 13 grandkidsand I remember, you know, I
remember a couple of Christmasesago and you know, when we have
(17:36):
Christmas over here, my wifespends months wrapping presents
and our grandkids tear intothose presents and what took her
months to wrap them and shopand get them all.
She's like Mrs Santa.
Everything was unlocked withinseconds, minutes, and they
unwrapped and next thing thefighting was happening Because
(18:03):
somebody got something thatsomebody else wanted and just
that human nature that we allcarry just starts coming out.
And I remember one time and Iwas going to say something but
my daughter, jessica, goes overand says okay, raleigh, you need
to go ask your sister forforgiveness.
You hit her because you didn'tget the present you wanted.
And he looks up at me, he looksup at his dad, it's going back
(18:30):
and forth and he walks over andhe hugs his sister and says
Sorry, forgive me.
I want to tell you that momentwas so powerful for me because I
realized that that momentstarted when I learned how to
really forgive and let go of thehurt.
(18:52):
And we all have hurt.
How many of you got hurt?
We all do so.
The next slide.
I want to share with you is thecommand that we have in Christ
is really blunt.
Loving God includes lovingpeople.
You've got to love both.
You've even got to love peoplethat are the opposite political
(19:14):
party than you, because I don'tknow about you.
It's really easy to bypass thefact that people who think
differently than you or lookdifferently than you.
It's so easy when bitterness isa fruit in your life Remember
(19:39):
we talked about bitterness inthe beginning To just completely
demonize that other person.
And so what do you do?
After you call somebody Hitler?
What's the next level?
Well, it's murder.
You're already murdered in yourheart and I mean it's just
(20:01):
crazy stuff.
Our ex-president got somebodytried to take him out again.
We're those things.
And yet there's a responsibilitythat you know.
Think about all the words thathave been spoken and think about
, just with us and in our ownlives, how angry we get with
(20:24):
people lives.
How angry we get with people,especially when they believe
something differently than we door have a different political
party.
See number one.
They don't cease being humanbeings.
They're still somebody that Godloves, but we don't like them
and many times we don't lovethem and many times we let that
(20:46):
bitterness get on us and theproblem is it leaks into our
families and gets on ourfamilies and it causes
incredible destruction.
And I haven't spoke muchdirectly into this, but I can't
tell you how many coaching timesI've had just dealing with the
(21:06):
issue of political hatred towhere it's.
You know, if you're a Democrator a Republican and you believe
something differently, or anindependent, the result of that
conversation, if that personfeels as though you're rejecting
what they believe, it becomes awar.
(21:28):
Families have been destroyedbecause of all this craziness.
Even the woke ideology and allthese things that really you
know quite honestly, is from thepit of hell.
It's from a place of just.
You know.
It comes from a group of peoplein the world who don't know who
they are, who don't know thelove of God, who don't know what
(21:52):
it's like to be clear about whoGod's made you to be and to do
it without shame and disgraceand fighting and manipulating
and demonizing.
When does all that end?
When does it end to where youknow families can be united?
Well, let me tell you how itgets there.
It starts with you, dad.
(22:13):
God wants to make fathers greatagain.
That's His commitment.
It's one of the reasons he sentHis Son Jesus?
Because he wanted to get Hisfathers back.
He wanted to get His mothersback.
He wanted to give His familiesback and wanted to get his
mothers back.
He wanted to give his familiesback.
And so, if you've got kids thatare sideways, I'm going to
share a few more things with youand then we're going to pray.
(22:34):
But love prospers Say this outloud, it's just so powerful.
My friend, jimmy Edwards, whomI love so much, gave this to me.
It's just so powerful.
My friend, jimmy Edwards, whomI love so much, gave this to me.
It's in Proverbs Love prosperswhen a fault is forgiven.
(22:55):
Love prospers when a fault isforgiven.
Wow, it goes on.
But dwelling on it separatesclose friends.
We lost a friend because of ahurt issues.
(23:21):
You know most of the kids thatare going to junior, high and
high school.
They don't know how to forgive.
They know how to get even.
They know how to talk.
They know how to you knowshadow bomb somebody online and
make fun of them, talk them down.
They know how to destroy otherpeople.
(23:42):
Where did they learn it from?
Is it just social media's fault?
I'd like to blame social media.
Social media is actually justyou know, a place where kids
come with who they really are,and it can ramp up the anger and
(24:03):
the angst between people.
But who do they learnforgiveness from?
But would your kids say, man,my dad prospers in love because
he's always forgiving people, hedoesn't hold grudges, he
doesn't get even, he loves.
(24:23):
Because here's the truth Timeto hydrate.
Can you really get even withsomebody who's hurt you?
Can you get even?
Can you make them suffer enoughand see?
(24:45):
So that's why Christ did whathe did, because he wants to
change something in us.
He wants to break something inus that without Christ, we go to
naturally, and that is, geteven to make that other pay for
what they've done.
The problem is it doesn't stopas long as bitterness has taken
(25:10):
root.
Has bitterness grabbed yourheart at any level?
Maybe it's time to forgive.
Don't work on.
Well, one day I'm going toforgive them.
Well, guess what?
You'll be bitter the entiretime and you're going to teach
your children it's okay to havea lifetime of hurt and separate
(25:30):
yourself from your cousins andyour uncles because something he
did to me when I was a kid.
How many times have you heardthat story?
Matter of fact, they've takenbitterness.
It's this current culture oflost kids who've gone to
colleges with lost professors,where they're now blaming their
(25:52):
life on what happened hundredsof years ago.
They want reparations for thehurt.
Can you really get it?
Can you really make enoughmoney to feel better?
Some people go oh yeah, yougive me a couple million, I'll
feel a whole lot better.
Well, no, you'll feel betteruntil you run out of money, but
(26:15):
you're still that cranky personthat's there.
See, the Bible says it reallyclearly get rid of all
bitterness, rage, anger, alongwith every form of malice.
We've looked at this versebefore, but I just feel
compelled tonight to talk to youthat listen with all your heart
(26:36):
.
Guard your family frombitterness, rage, anger and
everything.
And the way you do it, youfirst deal with it in yourself
bitterness, rage, anger andeverything.
And the way you do it, youfirst deal with it in yourself.
I mean, how many of you just,you're still angry by what
somebody did, a friend mighthave done, somebody might have
(26:59):
done in your life, and you'vegot to get rid of it.
How do you get rid of it?
There's only one way you forgive.
Oh, wait a minute.
That can't be that easy.
Well, it's not easy, becauseChrist died on the cross not
only for your sins that youwould do.
He also died on the cross forall the hurt of other people's
(27:23):
sins that they would do to you.
And so when you choose toforgive, it changes everything.
When you chose to receive God'smercy and he saved your life
and you were born again life andyou were born again.
(27:51):
When you did that, you now areheld to the same standard of
forgiving the way you wereforgiven.
Remember that scripture earlierthat we're to forgive the same
way that God forgives us.
That's completely andultimately.
Yeah, you say, well, it's hardto do that.
Well, of course it's hard to dothat because there's places in
our flesh that want to get even.
We want to hit back, we want todo it.
(28:13):
And it's interesting in theNational Football League, it's
the guy who throws the secondpunch that ends up getting the
flag.
Have you ever noticed thatSomebody throws a punch and then
the guy gets mad and he goesafter the flag?
Have you ever noticed thatSomebody throws a punch and then
the guy gets mad and he goesafter the guy, and the guy who
threw the second punch gets hit?
And there's only one way to beable to deal with that in life
(28:37):
is understanding that when Jesusdied on a cross, he took all
the hits that you would take too.
He took all the sin that wouldbe done against you from other
people, all the wickedness, allthe things that he took.
It all on him, all of it.
There was nothing left thatwasn't poured out For all of
(28:58):
eternity.
Up to that moment, and foreternity, everything, every sin
that would ever be done, wascovered by Christ on the cross,
so that when you get smacked inthe face, you realize that Jesus
took that too.
When you get mistreated, hetook that too.
When you get talked about, hetook that too.
(29:21):
When you know that, when you getthat, then why wouldn't I give
mercy and forgiveness tosomebody who is just as broken
as me?
See, that's the second part.
It's really staying in touchwith the fact that you are just
as broken as that person that'shurting you, or that brother who
(29:41):
said that or did that, or thatbrother who said that or did
that.
And when you live in that placeof being in touch with God's
mercy for you and receiving itbecause you asked for
forgiveness, oh, wow, there'snobody you can't forgive, and
(30:02):
not only that.
One other slide Is theresomebody that you need to
forgive right now, or maybesomebody you need to ask
forgiveness from?
And so that's what we dobusiness here, we don't just
talk about, oh, that would begood if we forgive.
(30:24):
We want to do it because theHoly Spirit has drawn you here
tonight, whether you recognizeit or not, because he loves you
and he wants your family andyour children to be healthy,
your children to be healthy, andthe only way that's going to
happen is when we, as fathers,to be the fathers of God's call,
(30:56):
because the way he makes usgreat again is that we model
forgiving, we model givingforgiveness and asking for
forgiveness.
Giving forgiveness and askingfor forgiveness yeah, that's one
thing that I didn't get tomention.
That's just part of this, andthat is when we go to our
children to ask for forgiveness.
It teaches them what it lookslike and I want to tell you I
(31:24):
don't remember you know itwasn't modeled much of my house
where my, my stepdad, cause, mydad was killed in action.
That's forgiveness a lot.
I knew he felt bad when he didthings.
He did the best he could.
He was just a amazing leaderand man, a naval officer,
(31:47):
decorated submarine commander,and he was the Navy way, but I
know he loved me, he was there.
You know in his life that wehad some great conversations
about really the power of askingyour kids for forgiveness, to
(32:11):
some of which he did, and toothers he didn't quite get there
, but it sets them free.
It set them free and it sets usfree when we're not making
bitter fruit and destroying ourfamilies.
And so the way to deal with thisis I want you to think who do
(32:33):
you need to forgive?
I mean, who's hurt you, thatwhen you see them, you walk away
in the room, you just walkanother way.
Or when you think about them,you can't bless them, because
you know when you've forgivensomebody, you really, at the
(32:55):
depth of your heart, you wantGod to bless them, and so you
might say, well, they don'tdeserve it.
Of course they don't deserve it.
None of us, we don't deserve it.
Of course they don't deserve it.
None of us.
We didn't deserve it While wewere still dead in our sin.
Romans 5.8 says Christ died foryou and me, and so if God died
(33:16):
for us when we were ugly and wewere ugly towards Him we should
do the same.
We should forgive when peopleare ugly towards us, even people
who don't agree with uspolitically which is, you know,
(33:36):
first and foremost, right beforeus in the church Because you
know bitterness won't help youeven vote in this next election.
You should—somebody would saywell, how are you going to vote?
(33:57):
Well, I'll tell you how I'mgoing to vote.
I'm voting for—because rightnow, the government still gives
us the ability to get to choosein our country, and if you're
outside the country, youprobably have a similar
government Maybe not, but itgives us the ability.
The civil authority gives usthe ability to choose a
(34:19):
president, or senators, orcongressmen, et cetera.
That's really a sacred right.
I know this.
What's astounding is only 40%of the Church of Jesus votes,
and yet they probably allcomplain when it's not going
well, like we all do.
And so part of how I'm facingthis whole thing is looking at
(34:44):
both candidates and asking justa simple question from a grandpa
which candidate is going tohelp my family to stay safe,
keep us out of wars, going toenable me to be the best father
and grandfather I can be?
(35:05):
Because we're not choosing apope in this election.
We're not choosing a spiritualleader.
We're choosing a civil leaderwho is appointed with delegated
(35:25):
authority that God backs up whenthe votes are counted.
And our job is to choose andreally think through the issues.
And I just want to help youwith something.
You've got to let go of yourbitterness if you hate one of
(35:45):
the candidates either way,because when I'm bitter at
somebody I don't think straightand it's really easy, it comes
right out of my mouth.
I got to go.
Lord forgive me.
So the issue is it's notwhether or not you like the
candidate, but which candidateis running for president is
going to give us the best shotat having great families.
(36:07):
That's for life.
That's a big thing.
You know the babies are knownby God in the womb.
You know, before their firstheartbeat.
He knew way from the beginning.
That's a big issue with me.
I care about because I careabout the baby.
I want every right for moms andgals.
(36:30):
You know it is her body, butthat baby has its own body.
I care about that deeply.
And so some of those issues arevery polarizing.
They might be, but they'reimportant to God and you take
all those things you're thinkingabout with the litmus test of
what the Bible says and you makethe best choice you can.
(36:50):
You'll never be perfect Because, at the end of the day, no
matter who is elected, JesusChrist is still King.
His kingdom is coming.
The book of Revelation lets usknow that his kingdom will
succeed, the devil will bedefeated, the church will be
(37:18):
glorified and we're going tospend forever and ever in heaven
.
So the only way to do that isyou've got to get rid of your
bitterness.
So you've got to model thateven with your kids.
When you're talking aboutpolitics, you listen, you learn,
even if they want to bedifferent than you.
But more than anything else inthe midst of this, I'm going to
challenge you with all that.
(37:38):
You've got to keep your heartopen, to listen to God and to
forgive people, all of them.
Forgive them, because people doa lot of stupid stuff,
especially in the governmentright now.
A lot of stupid stuff, andguess what I do?
A lot of stupid stuff we all do.
(38:01):
We're all broken and we allneed a Savior, and so, if our
heart's open, you never know whoyou get to share Christ with.
You never know who's watchingyou, but the number one audience
is watching you beloved is yourkids.
And so answer that question Italked about earlier.
Is there somebody in your lifethat you need to forgive or to
(38:24):
ask forgiveness from?
You might hate a whole partypolitically.
You got to get rid of thatbecause you're not big enough in
your life to get rid of, tohide that bitterness.
It's going to salt everythingin your life and it just would
(38:45):
be devastating.
And if you want some help beforewe get off, before we pray I
want to pray with you is that Ihave a series that I'm doing
right now.
We're going through this book,the Father You've Always Wanted,
and we have a ministry calledthe Father Difference, and our
ministry is designed to helpequip you and to give you every
(39:07):
tool that you need in your lifeto be able to really live the
life that God wants you to live.
And if you do that as a man, asa father, it's going to make
you a great dad, because you'regoing to be the kind of dad and
father that your kids are goingto want to be like.
And man, that's a powerful daywhen that happens.
So go to my website atthefatherdifferencecom.
(39:30):
If you can get this book.
There's a QR code there and youcan go to our website at
thefatherdifferencecom.
There's a lot of stuff there.
It's a free, daily devotionalplace to serve you.
We're here.
But all that to say, I want topray for you.
So I want you just to you know,if you're driving, don't close
(39:51):
your eyes, but I want you toopen your, I want you to put
your hands in front of you and Iwant you to let the Lord show
you.
I'm going to pray for you, he'sgoing to show you.
I want you to let the Lord putin your hands maybe a name or
(40:12):
somebody that you really hasn'tforgiven yet.
Maybe it's been years, maybeit's been 20, 30 years, and you
know you've got a problem.
When you say I just can'tforgive them, of course you can.
God forgave you for much worse.
So I'm going to pray for youand then I'll lead you in this
(40:33):
prayer.
Father, I pray for my friendsright now and I pray, lord, that
you would put in their hands sothey could see which they
already know, but those peoplethat they have held in a prison
of their anger, maybe for years.
Maybe it's a dad, a mom, anaunt, an uncle, somebody who's
(40:58):
abusive.
I pray, lord, that you would,right now, you would unlock that
prison gate of their heartthat's causing them, without
them even knowing it, to beingbitter, and I pray, father,
right now, that they could saythese words and just say,
(41:19):
whoever that person's name is,just say it out loud and just
say I choose to forgive youbecause Christ has forgiven me.
Just say those words overwhoever that is Maybe there's a
(41:41):
lot of names and there's notenough time tonight.
I want you to clear the decksthis week and let the Holy
Spirit bring up people that havegotten real estate in your
heart and bitterness has sort ofsat in there, and because when
(42:01):
you have bitterness in yourheart, you know what happens.
You don't have a place in yourheart for God's love.
So, father, I pray for myfriends.
I'm so grateful they're here,I'm so grateful for their
support and I pray right nowthat your Holy Spirit, I pray
you'd fall on them, you wouldbless them.
(42:22):
Holy Spirit, I pray you'd fallon them, you would bless them,
you would open their hearts tocome and get the ultimate
healing of letting go ofbitterness and hurt that many
have carried for far too long.
People are going to watch thisvideo long after this election
is over and I pray, lord, forthose that are watching, that
(42:43):
your heart would stay in thisplace of forgiving, no matter
what has happened, so that theirchildren see this and the model
of forgiveness is now passeddown from dad or mom to son or
daughter, down from dad or momto son or daughter, and their
(43:08):
children and their children'schildren live in this place of
blessing and love withoutbitterness ruling their family.
I pray in the name of Jesus, aGod, that you would break any
generational patterns ofbitterness from grandfathers to
sons to sons to daughters.
In the name of Jesus, lord,unlock forgiveness in them for
(43:32):
the sake of their family, theirchildren, and Lord, blow their
minds by the relationships andbegin to grow.
In the matchless name of Jesus,I pray Amen, amen.
Thanks for hanging with me.
I'm so grateful that you'rehere tonight and I'm speaking to
(43:53):
you from my studio here.
It's one of my paintings here,the mountain that the people of
Israel saw, mount Sinai.
And yet God, you know God fromthat mountain gave us the Ten
Commandments and all theseincredible promises in the Bible
so that you and I could live alife and be loved and to love
(44:17):
other people.
So remember, it's never toolate to change your whole family
story.
You be the change agent.
In the name of Jesus, god blessyou.
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