02. Unleashing Gratitude: Dr. Johnny Bergstrom's Journey From Fear to Freedom

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Michael Devous (00:00):
Hey there, everybody, welcome to the
Fearless Road podcast episodetwo.
Last week we dropped, withepisode one, our premier episode
with the amazing Jen Stornow.
I'm so proud of that episodeand her she's amazing.
I hope you watched it.
I hope you listened this week.
You know we keep the insightsflowing.

(00:21):
With episode two, with theamazing Dr Johnny Bergstrom, the
gratitude doctor, he changeseverything.
That's his message, that's hismission and now that's his book
out on Amazon, so go get it.
By the way, we talk a littlebit about gratitude and the

(00:42):
crossroads of gratitude and fearand how that they come together
to shape a person's life.
Speaking of shaping a person'slife, dr Johnny shares his
challenges with being bullied asa youth, and this is relevant
because October is NationalBullying Awareness Month, right?

(01:05):
So this is oh, oh, and October2nd is World Day of Bullying
Awareness, and that just happensto be the day that we drop the
episode, monday, october 2nd andI went through my own torturous
years middle school, juniorhigh school with bullying and of

(01:26):
course, this was in the 80s,which you know was a long time
ago, but it's still happeningtoday.
People Like it's still going on.
It's a terrible issue for thisworld, it's global and it
impacts so many lives.
In fact, here are some statsfor you 46% of teens report
being cyber bullied.
60% of these teens, 60% of ourteens that end up becoming mass

(01:52):
shooters, were bullied.
25% of LGBTQ students bulliedat school.
22% of all our students all ofour students bullied every year.
22%.
43% of them stated that if theywitnessed it, they wouldn't
intervene, they wouldn't help.

(02:15):
Why this is a problem?
This is a problem.
53.8% of our Latin brothers andsisters get bullied at work.
53% of our Latin brothers andsisters get bullied, not at high
school, at work.
I mean, come on.

(02:36):
So anyway, this month isNational Bullying Awareness
Month.
We can do something about itand we're having a conversation
on the Fearless Road with DrJohnny Berkstrom about bullying
but, more importantly, aboutgratitude, and you can talk to
your kids about that.
When you get them at home, youcan let them listen to the
episode.
So, yeah, this is your chanceto get in on the conversation.

(02:57):
This is your chance to actuallybring some awareness to the
issue.
So many of us have been bulliedand we've been down this
particular road.
So this episode, you know, wetalk about gratitude, we talk
about fear, we talk about howboth of these two things come
together to shape our lives andDr Johnny shows us with his book
especially five steps you cantake to help bring more

(03:21):
gratitude into your life, and heshares with us how it's really
changed his and that's hismission around the world to
change everyone by bringing alittle gratitude, helping them
find gratitude.
So, yeah, episode two comes outon Monday, october 2nd.
So download it, subscribe to it, like it, do all the things,

(03:45):
all the things you know, and,yeah, let me know your thoughts.
Hashtag at mentioned, tag usyou know all those things that
probably bad for sunlight.
Anyway, all right, kids, I'mwalking back up the hill and the
breathing is going to get heavy.
So stay fearless, stay healthyand be grateful.

(04:07):
I am for you.
Bye, okay, let's go ahead,let's begin, let's dive into
this.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcomeback to the Fearless Road

(04:28):
podcast.
I don't even know what episodethis is going to be, but it's
going to be a good episode.
Why?
Because we've got Dr Johnny onthe show.
Fearless Road podcast.
Dr Johnny is the gratitudedoctor.
He's an award-winning coach anddoctor of metaphysical science
and an entrepreneur.
His podcast, which is gratitude, changes everything, can be
found on all of your majornetworks and a new book that

(04:50):
just came out.
You can get it on Amazon.
Gratitude changes everything.
Dr Johnny has been diagnosedthere it is.
Dr Johnny has been diagnosing,prognosing and generally dosing
all of us daily with gratitudemedicine that helps to mend our
minds, heal our hearts andstrengthen our spirits all over
the world, by coaching clientsto live ultimately with

(05:11):
gratitude, with a lot ofgratitude.
Ladies and gentlemen, let'swelcome Dr Johnny Bergstrom.

Dr. Johnny Bergstrom (05:17):
Yay, everybody goes crazy.

I hear the applause, I can feel it right
now, there we go.

How are you?
How are you?
I'm well.
Thank you, I'm grateful.
How are you?

Well, you should be grateful.
You're going to teach us alittle bit about gratitude.
Hopefully, I'm going to dig inhere and find out how Fear plays
along with that on the FearlessRoad podcast today.
We're going to get a littleinto this.
Before we do, though, I want toget a little background on you
so the audience knows kind ofwhere you came from and how you
got to become the doctor ofgratitude.
Would you share with us alittle bit about that journey?

Sure, I started coaching in the general
vicinity of coaching about 15years ago.
It was for a leading weightloss company.
We'll leave it at that.
I myself lost 120 pounds at thetime.
I know, can you believe it?
After I got myself to goal, Ithought that that would be a

(06:11):
great place to work, and it wasFor the next four years.
After that I was coachingpeople throughout my county tons
of people to lose tons ofweight.
I really found that there was acalling within that to really
speak to the issues that wereunderneath why we were eating
and why we mismanaged foodbeyond what we needed it for

(06:32):
Generally.
After that was outgrown, Idecided that I could do that
kind of stuff on my own.
I decided to open my firstprivate practice and that was
about 11 years ago.
That was working with people,one-on-one, small groups about
four or less, then sometimessome corporate clients as well,
taking it to their places ofbusiness to take the same

(06:55):
approach.
But my own twist to it toreally go farther than what I
was not previously allowed to gobeyond, because that's what the
niche was.
I wanted to go beyond where Iwas allowed to take the needle
and then have to stop because wedidn't do that I was like okay,
I want to do that, I want toask the hard questions.

(07:16):
I needed to open the door myselffor that.
I've been in practice eversince 11 years 15 total, 11 on
my own and changing lives everyday and now mastering that
approach of gratitude globallyyes, globally.

Your journey to entrepreneurship.
That's right.
Six countries, six continents.
How many countries Continentstoo many, too many?

of course you haven't decided what
episode this is going to be.
You don't even know how longyour show is going to be.
Maybe we're not going to diveinto the counting countries.
Let's not do numbers, becausenumbers hurt A lot.

I'm not a math person so I just don't even
bother to go there.
That's why my consulting firmis called Fifth Quarter
Consulting, because math was notmy thing and when I was in
college I thought there werefive quarters to a tank of gas.
I called my dad from the sideof their road, so upset and
irritated.
He's like you've always beenlike that throughout life.
You've always had a fifthquarter of a tank.

(08:14):
No matter what you do, youalways think there's extra there
.
I was like well, that's whatI'm going to call the business
is Fifth Quarter Consulting,because we can always find more
in the tank.
Speaking of the ultimate lifeLLC your entrepreneurship
journey into business.
You created this LLC, which issort of a bespoke six-week
lifestyle coaching process.

(08:36):
Two things I think it's reallycool about that, but two things.
How would you describe yourphilosophy on entrepreneurship
if you have one and two?
There are no days off.
Can you elaborate on that?

I'll start with that one first, and
then you can think about a wayto expand the initial question
of that, because that's a loadedquestion about your philosophy.
Yeah, there are no.
Yeah, that one, we'll get backto that one.
A little circle, not quarters,though we know how we are with
quarters.

Yes, I've been jumping here.
Did anybody see that video ofthat girl trying to describe 30
degrees and how hotter it couldget?
Because 30 degrees on thecircle was only part of 360
degrees and that if we're at 30Celsius right now, it's just
going to get hotter?
I shared this with my dad andmy family.

(09:29):
It was like that's my math.
I totally understood what shewas saying.
So sorry about that to digressaudience, but if you check it
out, go to TikTok or Instagram,wherever it is.
Some lady in Britain isdescribing how hot it is based
on 360 degrees, and it's ablessing.
It's hysterical, but it'sreally good.

(09:50):
So sorry to interrupt you.

Yes, You're fine.
There are no days off.
There's something I have to see?

Yeah there really aren't.

No, there are no days off, and there
could be essentially days off ifI didn't manage the time well
and didn't have clients who wereoverlapping.
But I'm always on a call or atext thread with somebody about
something, but it's all my doing.
That's what I wanted to do Withlife coaching, which I've
evolved into personally.

(10:17):
For me, like style coaching,it's more about being able to
pick up a phone and saying youknow what?
I'm stuck right now.
I need you and you know I wearan Apple watch, I have an iPhone
, have access to everything andeverybody, so there's no reason
why I'm not reachable, unless,as it's understood by my clients
, that I'm with another clientor that, you know, I'm just

(10:40):
currently unable to actuallyjust take the call.
But there's nothing thatexpands more than an hour and
it's just that much better to beable to jump in and keep
somebody from choosing somethingthey wouldn't want to do.
So, whether the client's tryingto manage weight loss or other
issues that we've been workingon to build, it's those life

(11:01):
moments where might really diveinto, you know, with the
fearless road.
You know dealing with fear andapproaching a situation that
would normally scare them.
And okay, I'm about to do this.
I need a boost.
Where's my coach, Where's myguy?
And I'm right there.
It's like I might notphysically be right there, but
I'm right there, and so that wasthere I do.
It makes it yeah.

Because I imagine that them, that a client
knowing specifically under thecircumstances of being coached
lifestyle coaching as well aspersonal coaching to know that
they have access to you, couldbe make the difference between
being successful at certainchoices and not feeling
successful at certain choices,as well as overcoming some of
those fears in making thosechoices.

Right, exactly so there is a little bit
of a disclaimer there.
So, as you mentioned in the lead, in for that, there is a six
week program for everybody.
At the outset of the six weeks Ido a consultation, we talk, I
see if I think that I would begood for whomever, and then, if

(12:05):
they agree, we start working onit.
We're committed to each othernonstop it's not 24 hours a day,
but it is most hours of everyday into four six weeks and then
at the end of the six weeks,based on progress, based on
feelings, mutually, itdetermines if it goes on again
and it's been working really,really well, because a lot of
people have a fear of commitmentand a lot of us don't really

(12:29):
want to lock ourselves intosomething, especially at a
coaching rate.
It's not cheap and but you arepaying for extremely rare access
that is responded to, cater toand customized to you, and
that's why I wanted to reallyopen up this venture with
ultimate life was making it sothat it was accessible and
really ultimate, do you workwith a lot of executives and

(12:52):
entrepreneurs as well, and youfind you have a lot of those
reaching out to you when youcoach.
Yes, and because of that demandand their schedule, it's got to
be.
You know I might be at the dropof a hat.
It sounds like, okay, well,you're available all the time.
Well, I'm available most of thetime, but I'm not needed all
the time.
Like, hey, I have three minutesbetween this client and this

(13:12):
client.
What do I do?
You know, how do I handle thistype of personality?
This person is really just myultimate thing.
That really just gets menervous before a meeting or does
not pan out well otherwise thanthat is one of the one example
of how it works and how it justmakes it better.

And how would you describe the intersection of
gratitude and fear?

I would describe the intersection as one
that would be dark at first,but then a light would turn on
and, once illuminated, you seethat there is nothing to be
afraid of, because most of uswould you agree that most of us
fear the unknown Absolutely?

100%.
I think the majority and thisis I've said this before, I
think, on the show as well as inother ways the majority of the
fears that we discuss on thefearless road when talking to
entrepreneurs and businessexecutives and subject matter
experts and business and thingslike that almost every fear that
they have in regards to theirbusiness, that they have in

(14:21):
regards to making choices andbecoming.
This is what I say we eitherwant to do, be or have something
different than what wecurrently are in the state of
where we are, and we want tostep into that new space of our
new selves, the greater, betterversion of ourselves.
And in doing so, that brings upall of these fears.
They're all mental, they're allabout the unknown and they are

(14:43):
usually projections we put outin front of ourselves when, a we
don't know the outcome and, bthere's a sense of unworthiness
when there's a question aboutour worth in taking this on and
becoming this thing and doing orhaving the next, that next
thing right.
We have, for some reason, builtin our heads a space that is

(15:04):
available for both dreaming bigand making magic and being
little gods, little creators inthis world that is
simultaneously pitted againstfears of unknown doubts of
ability to complete worthinessand value in doing these things.

(15:25):
And I think we live in thisspace between the two things,
between the seven-year-old whowants to be a space astronaut
and a seven-year-old who'sterrified of the world and what
it means to grow up in it and Ithink that's where we've been
almost all our lives and forthose of us who live and work in
the entrepreneur space, whichis constantly creating

(15:45):
opportunities, creating services, creating goods, creating
whatever we are always going tobe met with, I think those fears
, because they come from insideof us, very few of them come
from outside and a lot of themhave to do with our self-worth
and value and what we perceive,our worthiness of taking this
thing, getting this thing,having this thing, becoming this

(16:05):
thing.
So, yeah, I would agree withyou.
I think that was a long way ofsaying yes.

Just draw it out.
I love your perspective andit's exactly right.
So much of a sphere of what wedon't know and it's the inherent
fear that blends with theconditioned fear that blends
with everything else that justdoesn't jive with what we think
we want and everything that wedecide that we want for
ourselves.
As we age, whether it's fromchildhood into adolescence, into

(16:35):
adulthood, we gauge what wewant and what we think we're
capable of, based on what we'vebeen conditioned by other people
to think, like you mentioned,what we're worthy of.
And then, based on what wethink we're worthy of, then we
start to doubt and we start towonder.
Well, they said I couldn't dothis, that person said I
couldn't do it, this one said Icouldn't do it.
So maybe I can't do it, maybe Ishouldn't do it, maybe I

(16:57):
shouldn't even bother trying.
Because what if I try?
And then everybody laughs at me?
And then the what ifs start.
And then what if I do it wrong?
What if I don't know how to doit?
What if it's ugly?
What if it's not worth otherpeople's time?
What if they laugh at my faceand tell me that that's not
going to work?
So many different what ifs,what ifs, what ifs that it makes
you just want to pull all ofyour hair.
So, as far as circling back tothe question about

(17:18):
entrepreneurship and myphilosophy with it, if you have
a goal, if you have somethingthat you think that you can do
better than anybody else, do it.
But it's not that easy.
Anybody who's ever saidanything about coaching for
entrepreneurs or anybody whowanted to start their own
venture.
It's hard as hell, and that'sthe part that they leave out.
It's exhausting.

(17:39):
When I started coaching, Ithought on my own because it was
a quick pivot when I decided togo on my own.
I had left the other job and itwas within three days that I
incorporated the venture for thefirst time.
And that was a very long butvery exhausting three days.
But three days later I hadenough capital, I was in with an
attorney, I started setting upthe business and then I opened.

(18:01):
And here we are and luckilyenough, because enough people
missed me from the previousventure and it's been long
enough that I can say that now.
Then my phone number started toget passed around and people
wanted to continue what we hadstarted out there together on
their own otherwise.
But it's a scary thing and itrequires a lot of time and I

(18:23):
really I do not have children.
I haven't decided if I wantthem or not.
I'm still young and gorgeous,so we're going to keep it this
way as long as I can, kiddingAnybody who watches this.
And you think well, you ego.
No, I'm, I really just try tomake you laugh, because if
you're going to watch this andyou're going to listen to
anything that any of us do inthe podcasting world and
anything that takes up your time, if you're still here, you know

(18:44):
that you've.
You've got something here.
So, but with the philosophywith it, it's not just if you
want, if you have something thatyou want to do yourself, to do
it.
I discovered a long time agobecause I had a lot of jobs.
I mean a lot of jobs.
I've done everything.
Well, not the manual labor jobs, but I did a lot of jobs.

And an indoor guy.
Let's be clear, they're still,they're still good.
Well, I mean.

I'm very, I live in South Florida, I'm
very fair skinned, I can'treally be outside without
getting burned, so I wasn'tgoing to do outside stuff.
So indoor stuff, fine, butlabor, labor all the way.
But I realized that I had anissue with everybody that I like
at somewhere where I worked,and it was like is this me?
What's the problem?
And the answer was yes.
But it wasn't that I was a lazyworker, it wasn't that I didn't

(19:32):
have what it took to do the job, it wasn't anything negative
about me.
And that's where that fear comesin as well.
From an employment employee,employer to employee relation is
that we start to wonder well, Ilost this job.
It must be me, yeah, it must beyou, because you must be meant
to be somewhere else, not that,oh, I'm not good enough, or
anything else.

(19:52):
So my discovery, michael, wasthat I could not work for other
people.
I had to work with other people.
Yes, so it had to be my control.
So that's the way it.
You know, even right now Iteach indoor cycling at a spin
studio near my house and it'slike I don't work for them.
Technically I do, because theycatch these right paychecks, but

(20:13):
I work with them.
You know, if I wanted to walkaway I could, but there's a big
way of changing that.
But anyway, that's a wholenother tangent.
But yeah.

So I listened to Fearless Motivation.
Not sure if you're familiarwith it, but it's just an
incredible audio.
It's like really inspirationalmusic set to these guys and
these ladies who do professionalspeaking and motivational
speaking and stuff theseincredible words Every day.
I like to like take these walksand listen to them and I get

(20:46):
this message bombardment all thetime.
You need to know your why yougot to believe first, and then
step out onto that road, and Ikind of don't agree.
I think you know.
Step onto your road, whetheryou know it or not, whether you
believe that you can do it ornot.
If it's something you think youlove, it's something you think
you're passionate about,something you really want to do.

(21:07):
You're going to get good, butyou're only going to get good
after you practice, and you canonly practice by putting your
foot to the pavement and takingthose steps and you will be in
the.
You were going to be in thatspace of unknown and that space
of unsure and that space of.
I don't know if I believe inmyself enough yet, but I want to

(21:27):
do this.
This is what I did withpodcasting and I was like I came
in and I built this thing and Idon't know anything about
podcasting.
I mean, I know a little bitfrom my entertainment background
and stuff I haven't worked withand produced other things, but
but I didn't know what it wouldtake to get this done and I
didn't know enough about fear.
Like I'm not a doctor, I don'thave a degree in psychology or
philosophy or any of that stuff.

(21:47):
What, what's?
What's my business?
What do I have, you know, to dowith fear and why do I feel
like I'm in a position to be thesubject matter expert in this
field?
Well, I wanted to become it, Iwant to step into it and become
that, and the only way to do itis to try and put yourself out
there.
So I figured, well, I can askquestions.
I'm really good at interviewingpeople.

(22:09):
I can ask you about your fearsand then hopefully, I can begin
to learn a little bit more aboutmy own and why my life has been
so impacted and so shaped byfear and by the opposite of fear
.
I should say the whatever we doto deal with fear, right,
whether that, whatever methodswe use coping mechanisms, you

(22:31):
name it.
What I found interesting waseach of us deals with fear,
obviously, and most of us arelike, you know, crush fear, kill
fear, take it down.
I'm going to overcome fear,thinking that along the way,
you've, you've, you've beaten it, you've, you've, that fear
didn't affect you, that feardidn't have an influence.
And I'm like, oh no, it did100%, because you chose to make

(22:52):
steps in spite of fear asopposed to with fear.
And for me, what I discovered,I think, along my journey, was
that when fear came up, I didn'twant to do things in spite of
fear.
Well, actually I did.
I would say I didn't want it, Ididn't want those things and
those moments to define me.
I was so adamant that those,those elements of tragedy and

(23:16):
violence and whatever thatoccurred in my life that created
fear and surrounded me withthat doubt, I refused to allow
them to define me and thereforedecided to do something, whether
it was the complete opposite orreinvent myself.
Well, that's fear affecting andshaping my life, because I'm
doing things counter to that,that moment, counter to the

(23:38):
effects of that, of that, ofthat outcome, and yet it's
shaping who I am and my choiceis based on that.
And then I was like well, Ididn't realize I was doing this
right, I wasn't aware of my, ofmy actionable choices.
I wasn't intentionally doingthese things.
And when I woke up about a yearago, sort of going, whoa, I've

(23:59):
been at sleep at the wheelunintentionally doing these
things.
What if I lived a life ofintention where I was actively
pursuing, actively engaged withmy fear and actively making
these choices?
What kind of life could I lead?
What kind of happiness and joyand outcomes would would I get?
And then that's when Idiscovered putting myself on
this path of the fearless roadand asking other people about

(24:21):
their experiences.
So that was a big tangent.
The reason why I say I think Ibring that up is because you
wrote in your thing heal, thewhole hum, doom and gloom
sentenced to life perspectivethat some of us adopt.
And I saw that and I was like,yes, yes, that is exactly what I

(24:43):
was feeling a little over ayear ago.
I was waking up every day,thinking I don't want to wake up
.
I was thinking do I have to eatand sleep and do the same thing
every single day, rinse andrepeat over and over and over
for the next what?
20, 30, 40 years?
When is it in what?
What's the point?
I was in that space where Ididn't.
I just didn't want to wake up,I didn't want to get out of bed,

(25:05):
I didn't want to come backtomorrow.
I was like I'm done, like thisis boring, I can't take it any
longer.
I went out, and my family, ofcourse everybody was very
concerned.
I like you, you know manuallabor.
I would never consider physicalsuicide or harming myself
because I think I'm toobeautiful and I don't want to do
that.
But you know there's, there's,there's.

(25:28):
I can't do all those things.
You know what I mean.
I'm like, oh God, that's just,that's horrifying.
You know that's too much, butI'll just sit here and complain.
And so I was like why are yougoing?
to lie around bitching andmoaning and being this version
of yourself every day, or areyou going to try to change it?
You know, and that's when Ithink the opportunity to
reinvent myself yet again, toexamine my life from this new

(25:52):
perspective came, came up andset me on this path.
So what do you say to those ofus who are stuck in that
sentenced to life perspective?
Why do we A why do we get there, like what's going on with our
brains and our minds and ouremotions, that that keeps us
feeling like this, and then howdo we begin to sort of pivot out

(26:15):
of there?

Well, well, for everybody's base
reason.
You know of the why, like youmentioned earlier, you know what
is.
It's hard to say what the whyis, but the reason why we stay
there is different for everybodyas well.
But the main thing that we haveto do is you have to decide,
and it often comes from anoutside source.
It's never this, it's reallyjust.

(26:38):
It's rarely the draw fromwithin.
There are very few people whocan be self starters with this.
But there is something withRealizing that what you think
about you bring about and it'snot just something that people
you know in the new thought andanything else say it's like oh,
what you think about you bringabout, just have a grateful day.
It's like, no, really, what youthink about you bring about,
there's the law of attraction.

(26:59):
If you think that your life isgonna suck, it's gonna suck if
you think you're like draw moreyeah draw more of that to you.
Yeah, you will draw more of thatto you, you know, and in my
book, gratitude changeseverything.
Cute little bug there, there wego.
Yeah, pick it up, it'savailable.
By the time you see this.
It is available, launching onthe 21st of September, which

(27:23):
happens to be world gratitudeday, so no coincidence there.
But but I outline in, by the way, so the this book.
So I'll just hold it here,since I don't have one of those
fun little displays behind me.
But this book is everything.
Okay, it looks nice on a coffeetable, but what's inside
matters?
There is not a single chapterthat takes even the slowest
reader more than eight minutesto read.

(27:44):
I I spaced it out because Idon't like books that squeeze in
all the, all the.
You know, the font is this bigand I have to strain to see it.
Then I got to figure out whereI was and then I my mind drifted
somewhere else.
I'm a no, it's nice and easy.
Plus, I didn't.
I wrote it as a book that Iwould want to read, because I
don't like to read things inorder.
My brain doesn't work in order.
I want to go and jump aroundand look at things that attract

(28:07):
me to them.
Hence the law of attraction.
So when there's one, there'sone, so pick one.
But it could be if you're inthe doom and gloom and you think
that every day is Destined tobe just like how they've always
been and that's what's gonnahappen.
But be aware, wake up a littlebit.
Let somebody say something toyou when people are genuinely
nice to you.
Don't just sit there and say,oh, they're just being nice me

(28:28):
because they feel sorry for me.
No, they're being nice to youbecause people are nice.
Where did we get to this pointthat people are no longer kind?
I cannot tell you how manypeople I see on a daily basis
where I hold the door for themand it's not just like, yeah,
I'm walking out of it, out ofthe building, holding the door
here, take it.
It's no, I'm holding the doorand I'm waiting, and I'm waiting
for the eye contact because Iwant them to see, I see you, I

(28:51):
want you to see me seeing youholding that.
Someone's holding the door foryou and I'm changing your date
right here, in five seconds, andthen, just because you held the
door, somebody's gonna changehow they walk to their car, how
they get in their car, what theythink about as they turn the
key or press the button and thenback up out of that space and
then move on with their day.
It takes something so minute,something so small, and if you

(29:13):
doubt that, think about the lasttime you got really pissed off
and you're having a great day.
It took how big of something itwas this big to piss you off
and it make you really mad.
And then what you think aboutyou bring about.
So then, right there, snowball,everything just turned a crap
right from that point.
But in the book and in mycoaching and in everything else

(29:34):
that I've been talking to peoplewith for more than 15 years, it
is always a matter of switchingit around in the blink of an
eye.
Just because you started thatway doesn't mean it has to stay
that way.
What you see now did not looklike this.
I started this process a yearago.
I needed to lose 50 poundsbecause of 120 that I lost, I
gained some back.
We had this thing called apandemic and I found this thing

(29:54):
called wine and I had friendswho found wine and we just you
know, I thought it'd be funny todo.
I had this video that I didlittle interjection of Working
out with wine.
So, yeah, watch this.
So we have wine set curls.
So pretend this is a wine glassand it was, and one and two we
didn't sip, and then we got toten, and then at ten you could
have a sip.

(30:16):
The reward and you know by theend, I mean great arms, but geez
, now we were doing curls withbottles and it was funny.
But anyway, so you know, thehabits changed and things
changed.
No, I didn't need to go tomeetings, I wasn't that bad.
But and mad respect foreverybody who has to and who
chooses to and shake your lifefor charge, I love that.
But I needed to change thehabits.
But I knew that and so I knewnobody was going to do it for me

(30:38):
and I knew there was hard workinvolved and I knew what to do.
So you just have to start doingsomething.
So, whatever that is, dosomething.
So, if your job sucks, to get anew one, but make sure you get
a new one before you leave theone you don't like, because
nobody needs to have a gap inthe pay.
Okay, the other thing we got todo is we have to figure out
what's gonna make us happy again.
This book will tell you how tofigure that out.

(31:01):
I have this little tactic, thislittle tool.
You can even write it down inthe book workbook to come, I'll
hold you, you can hold me to it.
It's called a mulo, m?
U L?
O, right, mulo, so it means myultimate life outline.
So you do a mulo for everythingthat you want in your life,
whether it's a relationship,whether it's a new job, whether

(31:21):
it's a new car, whether it's anew house, whether it's whatever
you do a mulo for, that itteaches you.
I teach you how to get specificwith designing the mulo, an
exact language to use with it.
And then, once you've done themulo, you realize it's like an
order You've sent to a companyfor something you want to buy.
When you do that, you don'tthink about it.
After that You're not like, oh,am I gonna get it?

(31:42):
Is it gonna come?
You start to wonders gonna cometoday, maybe tomorrow, maybe
tomorrow?
And you get excited about it.
But then finally shows up Ah,there it is, and I just start to
get used to doing that.
You just start to custom orderyour life into how you want it
to be.
And I tell a funny story in thebook about when I met and well
manifested and met my husbandand I was right.

(32:04):
I'll tell you the story andthen maybe you'll read about it
the.
I Was at a Starbucks one dayand I was writing in my journal,
as it often did, and I decidedthat I had just had a little
background.
I just come out of a three-yearrelationship and it wasn't that
great.
Probably should have ended ayear before it did, but anyway
it ended.
But so I was sitting in thatStarbucks and I was writing in
my journal.
I thought you know what this issilly.
I need to design who I want andI need to really itemize a list

(32:28):
as many things as possible, asSpecific as possible, right down
to, like birthmarks what do youwant, who do you want?
Write it down, serve, wrote itdown, and then I put it, my
journal, in my bag, and I leftfor the day, and that was in
July of 2013, and Few monthslater I'd gone a bunch of dates
by October, got introduced toChristian, okay.

(32:51):
And Then things went reallywell, as you can read about in
the book, talk about it.
And then I moved into thishouse, his house, this house,
hmm.
But one day I was unpacking abox of journals the one that I
had written in most recently.
That one was on top and so Isaw that's funny, let me take a
pen and see.
You know what I, what I've donein this book, just happened to

(33:14):
be bookmarked to the page of theItemizations of who I wanted in
my life.
So, while I had the pen in hand, little click, let's see.
And I'm checking off the firstone.
Well, that's funny.
You know gender, yes, we knowthat one's correct.
And next, and you know funnythings.
And then you get to the seventhone and the eighth one and I'm
a list of 19 things.
By the time I got to nine item19 every single box had been

(33:37):
checked.
And I was not only justchecking those boxes in the book
, I was checking the boxes inthe book that came out of a box
of books that came out of mystorage In the house that I had
manifest to come with the guy.
And here we are 10 years later.
So if that doesn't just say,how do I do that?

(34:00):
Tell me everything.
There you go.
Somehow.
I muted you, michael Holden.
I.

Did it to myself .

I apologize, you did, it wasn't my
fault.
I'm like I was so riveted.

I was riveted, ladies and gentlemen.
I muted myself so I could justlisten.
That was crucial.
Where was, like?
I was gonna say that, oh, thisshould be like the next thing
that you do, which is calledcustomized custom order your
life by dr Johnny.
If you want to custom orderyour life, you actually should
pick up his book about gratitudechanges everything.

(34:38):
Get it now and custom designyour life.
Maybe you can custom designyour mate, because it's like
Manifesting and I know peoplethink it's cliche and I know
people think that it's.
You know the law of attractionand all the lot of all these
weird things.
He say these cliche, thesethings that are out there.
But there's a reason whythey're all out there.

(34:58):
There's a few reasons.
One we need it, the world needsit.
We're in such a state ofscarcity and fear, we're in such
a state of pessimism, and youknow that that that's why so
much of it is coming up.
I think it's because so many ofus are desperate for these
options and opportunities andalternatives to the current
state of our thinking and being.

(35:19):
That seems to be really sort oflike, you know, underneath this
cloud of constant bombardmentof fear and scarcity and
Politics and all of the stressthat that comes with you know,
and I think it's as a society, Ithink we're we're also
genuinely reaching out to theworld with our own energy,

(35:41):
asking for more and ask you forother opportunities.
And that's, I think, where thiscomes up.
One of the things that I Readmany years ago and conversations
with God.
I don't know if anyone'sfamiliar with that.
Neil Donald wash wrote a seriesof books called conversations
with God and in this particular,in the first book I believe

(36:01):
it's first or second Well, allhe's having a conversation with
God and and God is reminding usthat we are little creators,
little gods in his image,brought down here to create, to
build this world in, in our, inour image, from our imagination.
And, yeah, so if, if, if youbelieve that, if you decide to

(36:25):
buy into the knowledge and theidea that we come from a great
creator and we are, in essence,a physical manifestation of that
very energy, that energy thatis creative.
We come from stars to our dust,whatever you want to call it
Then, yeah, our ability tomanifest what we believe and
what we think, our ability todraw to us the world that we

(36:46):
create, in fact, everythingaround you don't think exists on
this planet that we didn'tinvent, other than, I suppose,
nature, which we perceivethrough our eyes, but everything
else we created, it tooksomeone thinking it, thinking
about it and doing it and thencreating it, and then it's here.
You now enjoy it.
We're on the camera, we're onTVs, we're on doing podcasts,

(37:10):
we're doing radio shows, we'rewriting books, we're driving
cars, we're flying across theplanet on planes.
All of this from theimagination of a human being.
And so, yeah, if you are outthere and you aren't sure that
you can manifest these things, Ibeg to differ and I think that
practice is key, and I thinkthat's what Dr Johnny brings to

(37:31):
the table, especially with thisbook, I think especially with
his six week program, six sess,if I could say it correctly, and
, of course, a lot of the otherpeople that I've had on the show
talk about practice, and I'vementioned this before one of the
things that my yogi instructorhas mentioned before, which is
we fall to our practice, meaningthat if you have a bad day, if

(37:53):
you have a downfall, if youbreak your stride or something,
what you fall to the foundationyou've built for yourself is
your practice, and it takespractice.
It takes consistent, constant,ongoing, daily, if you can
manage it, practice to do thesethings to address our fears, to

(38:18):
adjust and change our habits, tostep into a different version
of ourselves, to invite andmanifest a new and beautiful
version of our lives.
Because if you don't practice,guess what you get.
You get what everything else is.
You get the fallback, you getthe leftovers, you get
whatever's coming right,whatever's coming, and that's

(38:41):
what you're left with.
And it's no wonder some of usforget, because our lives get
busy, we got children and jobsand driving in traffic, you name
it, all the distractions thatyou can list, that can thwart
your practice, that can driveyou away from it, you know, and
it can be easy to fall off.
So that was another soap up.

(39:02):
We are all here for it.
We're all here for it.
Do you have an origin storywith fear in your own life?
Oh God, well, would youdescribe your relationship with
fear?
I?

have a very, very, very deep root with
fear Sure.
I do and it's taken a long timeto realize that that's the
actual emotional root thatcauses a lot of strife and
things that I've had to overcome.
And I mean similarly to you.
I know that you shared onanother show that we were on, on

(39:37):
the Networking Diva Hour withour friend, janice Carlson.
Janice, and back in August yeah, yes, when you were on with her
, that you shared, that you knowa very poignant moment in your
life when you were 14.
And just realizing that you hadto own up with the fear, you
know, and for me, I was bullied.
I know you said you werebullied and the bullying for me

(39:58):
started at a very young age.
I mean I did not look like youknow this when I was five or six
years old.
When I was five I was adorableand then I had like an eight
year ugly span, like I mean whenI'm talking ugly, I went for
ugly, okay, yeah.
And I mean when you're the fatand chubby, you know pale skin,
freckled, you know orange-hairedkid, and you're going to

(40:19):
private school and you're goingto public school and you don't
look like anybody else, nomatter where you go.
You know you stick out and youare obviously a target.
So years and years of being theeasy target and then not having
, you know, a very big system ofsupport behind me to say it's
okay, they're all stupid,they're all kids, all kids are
stupid.
Like at that point, just stop,just wait till you get older,

(40:40):
it'll all stop.
But then you know what it kindof does because it took a
certain, it took getting to acertain age that it just kind of
stopped because adults don'treally act like that.
And then the ones that do, wejust kind of look at like what's
wrong with you?
And we walk away and live ourlives because they don't matter.
So if anybody who's goingthrough bullying and who is
young and the teens watchingthis today or any day they see

(41:02):
it and hearing it, trust me andit is cliche as well, but it
gets better.
It does get better.
But all those people who arelooking at you, telling you
whatever you don't want to hearand making you feel how you
don't feel, like you should feel, they will all change in the
next 10 years and so will you.
You just got to hang in thereBecause then in 10 years you're
going to be scarred witheverything that they did to you
and then they're going to belike what do you mean?

(41:22):
What did I say?
I didn't say anything to you.
Yeah, you did.
And it doesn't help when youhave a photogenic memory,
because I can tell you exactlywhere I was and when I was,
every single time I was bulliedin high school and in middle
school, and where I was and whodid it.
And if I told any one of thosepeople today, do you know what
you did to me when we were 13,?
And like, what the hell are youtalking about?
I don't remember what I didwhen I was 13.

They don't carry it forward so as much as it
rolls off they don't care, butit's an imprint on you.

And so you get to choose.
Am I going to let this imprintcontinue to leave its mark or am
I going to remove the mark,remove the brand and allow
myself to be whole within myselfagain?
And that is a personal choicethat comes with time and that
comes with support from somebodyelse, whether it's a coach,
whether it's a best friend,whether it's a family member who
gets it.

(42:09):
Somebody else needs to tell youI've got you.
And then it's up to you totrust them to say, yeah, I do
see that you've got me.
Thank you and be vulnerable andbe you.
But as far as fear and the OGstory about fear, there isn't
really one thing that reallysticks out as far as fear is
concerned.
But fear followed me intoadulthood, it followed me well

(42:31):
into my 30s, and it wasn't untilworking with my own coach over
the past year, both mentally andphysically, did I come to the
evaluation that a lot of mychoices, of things I choose to
do and choose not to do, arecompletely based in fear, and
it's a specific fear of theunknown based on what happened

(42:53):
when I was a kid.
Yes, so everything is circular.
It always finds its way back.
So we've got to break the cycle.

Well, thank you for sharing that.
I forget, I suppose that therecould be teenagers and young
kids out there also listening tothis show.
So, as a reminder to all of youwho may be listening, or
parents of kids who aresuffering from bullying, it is a
real thing, it is a very realthing.

(43:22):
I have two minds about it,which I'm very, I don't say
troubled, but I will say,struggle a little bit with.
I became who I was because Iwent through that.
It built me and I had themindset to deal with it, address
it, use it as fuel to fire mylife, and I think maybe that's

(43:45):
lucky, maybe that's blessed,maybe that's DNA, I don't know.
There are others who don't havethat gift, who don't have the
ability to see that as fuel fortheir fire and suffer greatly
under the pressures of that kindof bullying for years to come.
What I will say is whether itbuilds who you are or you are

(44:07):
stuck in the middle of it rightnow.
As Dr Donnie pointed out, thereis a future out there for you
where life gets beautiful andnone of that stuff exists any
longer, where it literally isjust in your rear view mirror
and as you get older.
I invite you to think about whoyou surround yourself with.

(44:28):
We have the option of puttingin our lives and surrounding
ourselves with individuals thatraise us up, support us and love
us for who we really are.
And if you're presenting to theworld someone other than who you
really are, you will live alife where you don't feel
satisfied and where you're nothappy because you're not living
your truth.
And regardless of whether thoseteenage kids are bullying you

(44:48):
or those kids in college orschool, whatever it is that
they're saying, doesn't matter.
You live your truth, you liveyour authenticity, and you will
find reward in that, you willfind happiness in that, and then
begin to surround yourself withpeople who love that version of
you, because it starts there.
It starts with you loving whoyou are.
And if you don't know who thatis, I encourage you to get on

(45:09):
that journey.
Pick up Dr Jarn's book and youwill help find your way to
discovering who you are andloving yourself better.
I don't even know where I washeaded with this.
I think it was like maybe it'sback.

Well, while you figure that out, can I
just jump in there andpiggyback on that?
It's like if you don't know whoyou are now, you don't need to,
but I can tell you who you arenot.
You are not anything negativethat anybody who knows you or
thinks that they know you in anycapacity would tell you that
you are.
Because who you are is who youdecide to be.
So if anybody has an opinionabout that, that's their opinion

(45:46):
.
That's not a fact and the factscome from you.
So you decide who you want tobe and you know what the silver
lining is the platinum liningalso talked about in the book
that I can tell you you are andwhat you have is that platinum
lining is that you always get tochange your mind.
If you don't like who you are,you can always turn and do
something else.
You don't like where you are?
You can turn and move something.
You are not a tree.
You are not rooted.

(46:07):
Even trees don't move.
So decide what you want.
It's always up to you.

That is very true.
Every new moment we step intoin this world is a brand new
moment.
Our cells are changingconstantly.
We lose 280 million an hour.
You are not the same person thatyou were 20 minutes ago when

(46:33):
you started this podcast.
You are a different human beingphysically.
So we are built for change.
We are built to adapt.
That is exactly what we arebuilt to do on this planet.
So if you think you're stuck ina place, trust me, you're built
to change.
You're a human.
You are built to adapt.
You're built to change.
You're built to learn and withthose three things in your
pocket, you can jettisoneverything that came before and

(46:57):
step 100% into a new version ofwho you wanna be.
Dr Johnny's book willdefinitely help you get there
and help teach you aboutgratitude.
Take me through a couple moreof those chapters in the book.
A little bit about what thosesteps may help us get to.
If we were to take the book andwe were to pick it up today and
randomly just pick a selection,what would you think that we

(47:18):
would guide us to first?

The book has a lot to do with turning
negatives and depositives, nomatter what they are.
The book is very much based ondescribing and determining what
you want your ultimate life tobe and what you want that to
look like.
So that would be the mulo.
And then there's a lot of itthat deals with the shift that
has happened post 2020.

(47:42):
And initially everybody thoughtthat, oh, I was one of them.
I got excited and I'm stillexcited for the pandemic
happening, not for every reason,obviously, it's morbid, but for
the good stuff and I mean, comeon, but it's like there, when
2020 was approaching, I thoughthindsight has always been said
it's hindsight is 2020.
You have the perfect way tolook back and see something that

(48:05):
you would want and to havehappen, and after that hindsight
was not 2020.
Hindsight, we were just gettingstarted.
So really it's foresight andit's all kinds of sight in 2020,
if you're willing to lookBecause when 2020 occurred, we
were barely in it before COVIDhappened and then suddenly
everything changed.
We literally had a global shift.

(48:26):
And so, to your point of whoyou are now and that you weren't
20 minutes ago, you are not whoyou were three years ago and
you're not who you were fouryears ago, but think about what
your life was like at this monthin 2019.
Where were you, what were youdoing?
What was life like?
And what's different now?
There's probably a lot that haschanged and, if that's the case

(48:47):
, great.
So the ho-hum, the doom andgloom, anything else?
If that was happening then, isit still?
If it wasn't, what changed?
And for all the differentthings that you have to try to
figure out, just start with onelittle thing.
But every single chapter in thisbook is uplifting.
Every single thing in here willhelp you.

(49:07):
There is nothing in here thatyou know.
It is in the genre of self-help, but there are a lot of
self-help books that I've readwhere, at the end of it, I'd
read the same thing about 16times.
There was a lot of fluff in thebook to make it seem like it
was this fat like life manualthat everybody needed to have,
but then by the end of it, Icouldn't answer the basic
question of what was that bookabout?

(49:28):
This book, it tells you exactlywhat it's about on the cover.
It's right here, and I'm notplugging this book in this cover
model, I mean hi, but gratitudechanges everything.
I open it in the introductionand I tell you, for this massive
problem that we have in theworld, there is a solution and
it is gratitude.
I introduce another probleminto the mix.
The solution is gratitude.
You cannot feel negatively whenyou feel grateful.

(49:51):
Gratitude is a positive emotion.
When you feel positive, youfeel good.
When you feel good, you thinkgood thoughts, you think about
good things.
You feel good so when you thinkabout you bring about from a
few minutes ago, bringing itright back in.
That's why you start withgratitude, because if you are
not feeling great, if you'rehaving a day from hell, if

(50:12):
you're having any situation thatis not good, what am I grateful
for?
Have your fast five.
The book teaches you how to dothat too.
Five things that you can alwaysdepend on to whip your head
back in a shape and say, wait,that might be terrible, but this
is what I've got.
I've got A, b, c, d, e, one,two, three, four, five.
Pick them, don't pick them.
Pick up letters, numbers,whatever, it doesn't matter, but

(50:34):
you have to have your fast five.
And then, once you've namedthem don't just name them to say
, yeah, he told me I needed tohave five things.
Here they are.
Feel them, think about them,allow them to affect you, and
then from there is whatever wasbothering you, that big, and
usually it's not so then youstart to feel good, you start to
think those grateful thoughts,and then you start to look

(50:55):
around and say, well, I did five, how about five more?
And then, how about five more?
You got five minutes.
How many can you think of infive minutes?
And you know what?
Honestly, if you have time togo to the bathroom during the
day, you have time to thinkabout what you're grateful for.
I'm just gonna leave it at that, however.
I will also say that theirgratitude changes everything,

(51:16):
everything, and that's why Ireally hope that and I wanted
this to come out now, because Iwanted it to be out in time for
Thanksgiving for Americans andthen for you Canadians and
anybody else doing.
You know, canadians celebrateThanksgiving when we have our
Columbus Day, indigenousPeople's Day, so we will.
You know we misalign with themonths, but either way, the

(51:37):
gratitude appreciation, the dayof giving thanks, is coming, but
why is it just one day?
So if you think about howgratitude changes everything,
you take that day event where weeat too much, don't sleep
enough and have to deal with thefamily members we really don't
wanna see more than once a yearinto this daily occurrence of
these things.
That will literally change yourlife.

(51:58):
So if you live in a life ofdoom and gloom, ho-hum, I hate
everything.
What am I supposed to do aboutit?
You're supposed to start withgratitude.
Get the book, walk through it,pick it up, put it down.
Pick it up, put it down.
It looks real nice on a copytable, but I remember I told you
in the beginning this wasn'tmeant to be read cover to cover
in a day.
Look at the table of contents,pick something that feels right,

(52:21):
read it and say okay.
But I do want you to read theintroduction first.
It's not that long but it setsthe tone for the whole book and
then you can piecemeal and jumparound and just see what grabs
you, because it really trulydoes work and it's full.
To finish answering yourquestion, the whole thing is
depicted with real life examplesof how to do exactly what I've

(52:43):
been saying to do, based on whatI've done in my own life to go
from an absolute 180 negative tocomplete positive.

Wonderful Is there.
Can we be grateful for fear?

Yes, and we should be grateful for fear.
You want to know why.

I was waiting.
I'm like, I'm on bated breath.

How do we Like I see your face and like
he wants to know why I do I wantto?
you should be grateful for fear.
You should be grateful forgrief.
You should be grateful forevery single emotion.
Why?
Because for every emotion thatyou feel, there's an opposite.
So if you're feeling somethingyou can assess, do I want to
feel this or not?
And if you don't, then theanswer is what do I want to feel

(53:29):
?
Whatever you don't want to feel, you want to feel its opposite.
And then how do you feel itsopposite?
Say it with me, start withgratitude you got it See already
get A plus right there andthat's where it starts.
But, yes, you should be gratefulfor fear, because that's the
stuff that helps you feel like avictor.
When you finally face the fear,you have to remember to with

(53:53):
fear.
It's not something that's juston the surface.
Fear is the deepest rootedemotion that we must.
I mean, that's not, I don'thave a scientific basis to say
that, but I'm going to say itanyway.
Fear is the deepest rootedemotion that we have because it
navigates every single choiceyou make, whether it's good,
whether it's bad.
There's something in there.
So be grateful for that Because, like you said, part of
everything that you overcome andeverything that you've dealt

(54:14):
with fear based has made you whoyou are, and that is the
biggest thing for anybody stilltrying to figure out who they
are, no matter what age you are,you, no matter what phase of
life.
If you still don't know,there's still time.
But you just have to startasking yourself what do I want
and how am I going to get it?
You don't have to worry aboutthe how.
The how will figure it out.
You just have to decide what itis that you want.

(54:35):
And so, for me, my want andthis is the no g part.
The want was to bring gratitudeand healing to the world.
That's what I wanted to do.
And ever since I decided to dothat, here I am.
And I didn't know.
I wanted to have a podcast.
When I started that, janicetold you when you were on her
show that I didn't want to dothis.
I didn't know how to do this.
Yeah, people had them and I'mstill looking at some things in

(54:58):
code and I'm like what the hellis that?
I mean, I don't know and I haveto use that lovely thing called
Google.
And then I still don't know.
But in less than 60 secondsI'll tell you why I was.
I was every step finished withthe podcast.
I had it recorded when I firststarted doing it.
I had them, I had the episodesready to go.
I just had no idea how toextend it beyond and push it to

(55:21):
to Apple.
No clip.
I attended a conference and Imet a woman at a at the hot bar
at Whole Foods after theconference.
We were both going for theseroasted vegetables and she
grabbed the tabby of activity atthe hot bar at Whole Foods.

Like you can meet all kinds of people there,
you know bell pepper, a littleeggplant you know, but so she
reached for the tongs and I said, okay, after you.

And I saw that she had the name tag on,
and so did I, and I said, oh,you went to the thing next door,
which, thanks to that, wasgreat.
And then we started talking andthen, under your name, said
where you're from, and she wasfrom where I was from.
So how funny, we were both inMiami, both from Palm Beach
Gardens, even though I'm inJupiter and they're very close
and we got to talking and weexchanged information and she
was literally like a mile awayfrom me, location wise.

(56:06):
So we had coffee one day andshe said so if I can ever help
you with anything, let me know.
I said well, you don't knowanybody who knows how to do a
podcast, do you?
And she says I have a podcast.
I'm like okay, I have onequestion.
I've done XYZ.
What do I do now?
Literally blah, blah, blah.
Thank you, couldn't figure itout any other way.
And if anybody's looking atthat going, god, you're dumb, no
, I just didn't get it.

(56:27):
Like, I'm really smart, I justdidn't know how to do it.
So it just takes somebodytelling you that one key
ingredient, and so for that,here you go.
I still don't know how to putit to all these other ones, but
maybe you'll tell me how to doit.

It's funny because I'm I I love.
It's so bizarre for me to saythis.
I love information and I lovefinding out things, especially
if they fall in line with thingsthat I find interesting.
I mean, I can get lost downrabbit holes of discovery about
those topics.
You know, if it's somethingthat I don't, if it's not
interesting to me, oh, my brainwill be like you don't exist and

(57:06):
I can't.
I can't get past that barrierto learn, to learn.
This is one of these thingsrecently that I was dealing with
.
It's a new piece of software Ihave to deal with.
I had tried everything to tryto get around doing it and
somebody else can do it.
Maybe somebody else is smarter,Maybe somebody else can do that
.
So I'm doing whatever and Ifinally had to have a
conversation with myself to sayyou have to learn this, You're

(57:27):
going to have to like it andyou're going to have to learn it
.
So you're going to switch thatpart of your brain, tell your
brain look, guys, we need thisto work, we need this to be
successful.
This is going to help us in thelong run.
How do we get to a place wherewe a we like it, be, we're
interested and see we're nowlearning it really easily,
Because if I like it and I'minterested, I'll learn very fast

(57:49):
, and that's probably true for alot of people out there.
So, if you're hearing this orwhatever, take this tip or trick
if you like.
If you can sit down withyourself long enough to convince
yourself that this is somethingthat's valuable to you and you
can enjoy it once you're on theother side, because things that
I know, things I'm familiar with, I enjoy so much better because
I've beyond the learning stageand beyond the unknown space,

(58:10):
right, I'm now into the space ofusing it, utilizing it, putting
it, putting it into practice inmy life, applying it to certain
things that help me.
Right, it's now a tool in mytoolbox.
And if we don't, if it's not atool yet, but it's just another
awkward thing that you'recarrying around and you're like,
oh no, do this then I canunderstand how that can be
difficult.

(58:30):
But it's one of those things.
Yeah, when I was trying to dothe podcast, I want to learn all
of it, I'd love to do it allwell, but then again, there are
places where my energy needs tobe spent, and so for me, it was
a struggle in some areas where Iwas like I have to carve out
time and just make that happen.
I think that's also true seguewe have to carve out time to

(58:53):
make it happen for gratitude,Fear and gratitude, which can
play incredible roles in ourlives One we try to avoid, one
we're not familiar with, onewe're not, you know, always
chasing down.
And I encourage you to getcomfortable with and familiar
with your fears.
I encourage you to have adialogue with it.
I encourage you to findgratitude for that part of who

(59:14):
you are, Because your fear isconstantly telling you things
about life and about the worldaround you and about your own
thinking.
And if you can becomecomfortable enough with it, to
have and engage with it in adialogue where you now are
grateful for the energy and theinformation it's giving you, you
will begin to act on life somuch differently than you did

(59:34):
before.
And I think gratitude I thinkyou're right, I think I have a
gratitude for fear that I didn'tknow I had developed.
I don't think I have beenactively and this is what I was
saying before.
You know, I don't think I wasactively operating with
intention in my life from aplace of gratitude.
I don't think I wasintentionally living my life

(59:54):
from a lot of different placesand now that I know that those
things are tools that I havelived with and had, that those
are things I've applied indifferent ways in my life, now I
can actively do that and, yeah,I think finding your gratitude
for things in life is a gamechanger.
It is a mindset game changerfor so many things.

(01:00:15):
If you find yourself beingpessimistic and negative and I
get into this headspacesometimes so irritated you got
to find something, whether it'sa maybe, it's something you like
, a stone that you hold on to,or a-.

Dr. Johnny Bergstrom (01:00:27):
Did you really just say that?

Michael Devous (01:00:29):
What's that?

It's literally been in my hand the
entire time.
There you go, come on, come on,it's there.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, he didn't know I had
this.
I did not know his gratitudestone was in the palm of his
hand.

It's actually a touchstone.

It's a touchstone If you need a
touchstone and I encourage youto find something that just
reminds you of a grateful moment, of a beautiful opportunity,
something that brings you joy orhappiness or whatever.
It's very, it grounds you, ittakes you to that place and that
space and that moment.
So, out of your head, out ofwhatever negative space that you

(01:01:10):
are in temporarily, touch thething, do the thing, whatever it
is, tap your wrist 27 times Idon't know whatever you got to
do Rub that stone.
You can sort of switch yourbrain a little bit and find the
gratitude.
And if it's hard to find thegratitude, obviously you can
pick up Dr Donnie's book or thefive things you wrote down, by
the way.
You know, write them down,remind yourself, pick them up,
look at them every now and thenput them into a little wishbox.

(01:01:32):
I had this beautiful littlewishbox behind me on everybody's
seat my mom gave this to mewhich sort of a Japanese or
Chinese woven box that I used toput cards of, wishcards and
things and manifestation thingsinside of it once a year, close
it and then open it up a yearlater or whatever, to see if

(01:01:52):
anything came true, and thenburn them in effigy with a
bottle of wine.
Have that backyard fire whereyou're like, get the wine bottle
out, we're going to take thesesuckers and we're going to light
them on fire and send them outinto the world.
You know, which I was a lot offun.
I think, too, if you have everdone that kind of manifesting
where you write them down onpieces of paper and blow them

(01:02:12):
into the world for wishes, thenthat could be a lot of fun as
well.
So the end the year is coming toa close here fast for us in
2023.
You've just completed your book.
It's out now and it's in.
It's making its way through theworld.
The International Day ofGratitude is coming up and 2023

(01:02:34):
will be coming to a close.
Do you have any major well,milestones or challenges that
you that are up in front of youthat you want to share with us?
Other than your accomplishmentthat you've already done.
Like you congratulations, bythe way.
I mean, you've hit them all outof the park this year, so I'm
not trying to put any morepressure on you for the rest of
the year.
Maybe you need to just slide itinto home and be all right, but

(01:02:56):
that's kind of where I wasgoing I was kind of like chill.
The rest of the note.

I think it's not a fear based.
It's, I think.
Well, let me reach out, let mephrase that.
It is fear based and there is afear with what I want to do for
the rest of the year, and it'snot a fear of it being possible.
The fear is remembering to doevery single thing that I want
to do, seeing it through,bringing it to market and to

(01:03:26):
making sure that it actually,like, comes to fruition.
This book is six years intomaking and it's very.
It's euphoric at the same timethat it's surreal that I cannot
believe I finished it.
And short story real quick theother day I was cleaning out a

(01:03:46):
closet in a different bedroom.
It was the same closet.
I actually had the box ofjournals from the beginning of
what we talked about and theholder that was holding a bunch
of files.
It was this thing you wraparound part of the closet in
Zvilcro.
Anyway, I've had that foreverand it finally gave.
So everything that was in therejust bursted through the door
and almost broke the door down.
It was a mess.
So I left it there for a coupleof weeks because it was like

(01:04:09):
yeah, it's not a room I use allthe time, I'll just go, I'll get
to it.
And then I finally got to itbecause it irritated me, so I
dealt with it.
And that's what I do with theirritation emotion is, I deal
with it eventually.
But I sat there and I was goingthrough all these papers and
things and then I found somehandwritten manuscript notes
from the first manuscript ofthis book.
That was not this book at thetime, but it was this book and

(01:04:32):
that was in 2017.
And I'm looking through and I'mjust laughing because I see
some of the chapter titles andthose actually made it into the
book.
And then, as I kept siftingthrough all the stuff that fell
out of the closet, I found thefirst type copy of the first
beginnings of the manuscript.
So now I've got this next to me, I've got the manuscript over
here and it's like, okay, thisactually finally happened.

(01:04:54):
So, whatever you're working on,whether it's a manuscript,
whether it's whatever, if it'sbeen six years, it doesn't
matter, you'll get there.
You just put it down and pickit back up when you're ready to
do it.
But as far as the rest of theyear, last year, at the end of
the 2022, I said 23 is going tobe the year of me and it really
has been.
I changed my mind, I changed mybody.

(01:05:16):
This year I changed this bookand I hope that that changes the
lives of everybody who picks itup and reads it.
It's a great thing to bring toThanksgiving this year.
Instead of a dish, maybe bringa dish and a book, because if
the conversation gets a littlecrazy, and we all have that
relative who likes to talk aboutthose things.
We really shouldn't talk aboutit Thanksgiving.
Then you say and we're going toopen the book and we're going

(01:05:37):
to pick a chapter and we're eachgoing to just say one thing A
little bit better.

Just flip to an activity page.
I mean, come on, hey, whatbetter gift to bring than your
mom's dish of green beancasserole and the book from Dr
Johnny?
Gratitude changes everythingfor Thanksgiving this year, or
it just people take.

(01:06:02):
I love that, do you?
Are there three?
I mean, I say three things thatyou could.
You know that you wantlisteners to take away One, two,
three things, whichever theyare, other than you know,
obviously, to pick up the book,read the book, buy the book, get
down with it.
What would you leave theaudience with today if you could
?
Just one lasting thought orimpression?

I really want everybody to remember that,
as much as gratitude changeseverything, that is really
something that drives at homebook or notebook.
Just remember that.
That's what changes everything,and everything that you want
and everything that you desirehas already been and always will
be inside you.
So you just have to listen tothat little voice within that's
telling you what you want andwhat you desire.

(01:06:45):
Nothing has to be earthshattering right now.
It doesn't have to be.
You don't have to have everyanswer right now.
What you have to have is aconversation with yourself what
do I want?
And take it from there.
But if you're going to have thequestions, you've got to be able
to write down the answers.
So you might as well startdocumenting them, whether
they're a wish that you burn inthe backyard with a bottle of
wine saying maybe, or write itdown in a book and you keep it

(01:07:08):
in a prominent location to sayI've ordered that, where is it?
Then you have to make sure thatyour actions are in line with
what you've ordered.
So all kinds of great stuff.
You know, and if I can be ofany help, please reach out to me
.
Johnnyverksoncom, and you knowsix weeks could be all you need
for six weeks, six sessions andsuccess.

Yes, you heard it right here, dr Johnny.
You can get his book.
You can get your life back inorder.
You can find your gratitudewith your attitude, you can
change your practices and yourhabits and, ultimately, you can
change your lives.
Josh, I wanted to ask, I think,a few other things.
Oh, about vulnerability.
First of all, I want to thankyou for being vulnerable and

(01:07:50):
sharing your stories and yourtime with us today.
I know that one of the things Iask of my guests is to share
their vulnerability with us, tocreate a safe space where we can
all talk about those vulnerablesides of our life, where I
think vulnerability is asuperpower.
I think gratitude is asuperpower.
I think understanding our fearis a superpower.
So, if you want to change yourlives and you want to be more

(01:08:16):
just, more I don't know moreanything more happy, more
gratitude, more everything,vulnerability is a great place
to start.
How does vulnerability play arole with gratitude?
Where do these two cometogether for us in terms of how
we deal with them?
I know that people avoidvulnerability a lot because it's
an uncomfortable space for them, but I believe that that's

(01:08:36):
where creativity and love comefrom.
I believe that that's theorigination of our.
That's the soil where we plantour seeds for all the great
things that come out of life Isgratitude and vulnerability.
Are they sharing some spacethere?

Sure sure , Vulnerability.
A lot of us don't want to bevulnerable because of that magic
F word.
Yeah, fear.
It's a fear of what people willthink if we are vulnerable.
It's a fear of making otherpeople uncomfortable if we share
something about ourselves thatthey didn't see coming at the
wrong time.
And there are just so manythings.
So we all just kind of lockthat up and we don't show

(01:09:11):
ourselves to each other.
And we also have this lovelyconditioning by a world that
lives through social media'slens that we don't want to see
things that don't look optimalor aren't ready for a show and
don't have perfect lighting anddon't have perfect backdrop.
And be authentic, be messy, Putyour best foot forward.

Yeah, be ready to let.
Is the other foot bad?
Is that a bad foot?
Is that like a club foot?
No, no, not supposed to bringthat foot with me, just the best
foot Like.
That's my foot.
How?

about the foot that gives you the most
balance.
Put that foot forward, thankyou.
How about that Exactly?
How about that one?
Yeah, I think that's a greatgratitude because if you realize
your power and vulnerability,you realize that everybody else
is aching to be vulnerable.
Everybody is aching to show youwho they are, if they feel safe
enough to show you that they'rejust like you.

(01:10:02):
But we haven't created as asociety, we haven't created that
as a world, global population.
We have not created that.
So let's create that.
Let's make it safe foreverybody.
Just to say this is me, yeahexactly, and I think it starts.

In order to create a world where
vulnerability is acceptable, itbegins with you.
You have to be vulnerable andyou have to show other people
that it's okay, and whether theyagree with you or not, whether
they take that step andappreciate it or not, whether
they respond positively or not,it doesn't matter.
Their response is not.
What's important, yourunderstanding that you've
created that moment and thatopportunity to be vulnerable and

(01:10:38):
to share yourself, and it'sdifferent than speaking truths.
Let's be clear about this.
There's a lot of people outthere who said well, I just said
the truth.
Well, yeah, speak your owntruth, not other people's.
By the way, it's not your placeto speak other people's truth.
It's your place to speak yourown truth.
And if you're not prepared todo it, certainly don't shout
other people's from themountaintops and none of your

(01:10:59):
business.
It's not your place to do it.
But if you want to bevulnerable and have a vulnerable
space, knowing that otherpeople can share that, without
that judgment, without thattruth telling, by the way, you
know, which is what people hidebehind, just truth telling.
I think that and I think peopleare dying.
Brinay Brown, who talks aboutthis, of course.
I've mentioned her severaltimes is you know.

(01:11:20):
She talks about vulnerabilityas a superpower.
I think today, what we'velearned, ladies and gentlemen,
from Dr Johnny is that gratitudeis a superpower.
I think it's a lost art form,or maybe it just needs to be
reminded.
You know the artist's way Bigjournals, oprah Winfrey, you

(01:11:43):
name it.
It's out there.
People have been trying toshare this with us for some time
now, and if you need a reallygood reminder of gratitude, pick
up Dr Johnny's.
Get it today, write to him andtell him how it's changed your
life.
Write to me, hell, write to theshow, talk to us, let us know
how it's changed you and, as hementioned earlier, you can get

(01:12:06):
him at drjonybergstromcom.
Is that right, dr Johnny?
That's right.
No, just johnnybergstromcom.
Oh, johnny Bergstromcom.
I call him Dr Johnny, becausethat's how I met him on the
Janice Carlson show, the DivaHour.
Is there any other place we cancatch you other than getting
your book on like Amazon or?

A book is available on Amazon.
The Kindle version is alsoavailable on Amazon.
I'm working on the audio tofollow, so stay tuned, for that.
Podcast is available on Appleas well as BlogTalk.
Radio for gratitude changeseverything, launching a new
season starting soon.
I don't have an exact date forthat, but stay tuned.
I'll let you know so you canlet everybody else know.
Instahandel, dr JohnnyBergstrom.

(01:12:47):
That's where everything's goingto be, so that one does have
the doctor.
So any social medias will havethat there.
But those can be found throughmy website, johnnybergstromcom.

Awesome, awesome , all right, well, thank you
Much gratitude to you today, drJohnny, for sharing your time,
your book with us, your journeywith us, everything.
I'm going to be doing myhomework with his book and I'm
going to be journal.
Oh, you said it's going to beturned into a workbook.
Are you do you have workshopsand stuff that we could attend?
Is there like a group relatedor is it one on one for these?

Those will be works in progress, oh
2024.

Probably you know as of now, the team is very
small.

So you're looking at it.
This is me, this is the team.
Well, I love to help you.
I'm down for career.

I'm down for workshop in the workshop.
I will, I will, I will be therewith you every step of the way,
if you want, maybe not 24 sevenbut uh, but I would.
I would enjoy the opportunity.
All right, ladies and gentlemen, thanks for joining us again on
the fearless road podcast.
This has been Dr JohnnyBergstrom, the gratitude doctor.
His book is out.

(01:14:00):
Like I've said, pick it up, getit.
It's a life changer.
It makes a difference ineverything that you do see and
have and receive.
Dr Johnny, thank you so muchfor coming on.

Dr. Johnny Berg (01:14:11):
Congratulations on your new show.
Thanks for making me such apart of it in the beginning
Ground battle.
There we go Boom.

Fearless road.

We're paving it, here we go, we're off
.

That's it All.
Right, ladies and gentlemen, go, be fearless, have an amazing
day and share your gratitudewith someone today, and let them
feel embraced and warmed andwelcomed.
Otherwise, stay fearless.
Check you later.
Bye guys, bye.

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02. Unleashing Gratitude: Dr. Johnny Bergstrom's Journey From Fear to Freedom

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