09. Lip Sync To Love: Cindy Austin's Transformative Journey into Love and Self-Discovery

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Michael Devous (00:04):
you, you, you, you.

(01:34):
I'm going to turn off that.

(03:01):
There we go, here we are inrecording, so I'm turning on I
recording In studio.
All right, are you ready?

Cindy Austin (03:19):
I'm ready.

Awesome.
Okay, ladies and gentlemen,welcome to the Fearless Road
podcast.
If you've been here before, youknow the deal.
We talked to entrepreneurs,business professionals, amazing
people about their life, ontheir journey toward success,
through the valleys and then upfinally to the mountain where it
looks like success can be madeand can be had.
But what we do really focus onis fear, and we like to talk
about how fear shapes us and howfear impacts our lives as

(03:46):
business peoples, entrepreneurs,as thought leaders, executives
and things like that visionaries, because fear is a component of
I believe fear is a crucialcomponent of success in our
lives and I believe that it issomething that, if we can turn
it into a tool and fuel, it canreally propel us into areas of
our lives that we may not havegone before, A and B, that we

(04:07):
didn't know we could.
And taking those challenges onis something I feel like
entrepreneurs do every singleday, and we are at the forefront
of this territory.
Somebody else at the forefrontof this territory doing some
incredible work, by the way,with Lowe, is the incredible
Cindy Austin, with over 22 yearsas a licensed counselor,

(04:30):
teacher, mentor, coach,specializing in romance,
coupling, dating relationshipsand, of course, her new program
oh, I just forgot the name of it.
The new program that you've got, lip Sync.
Lip Sync, yes, yes, gosh.
Well, this is part of thereason why I need help.
The new program Lip Sync forcouples.
She helps others discover howto define their own happiness

(04:52):
and, when it comes to love andrelationships, she not only
holds your hand, but she holdsyou accountable.
Ladies and gentlemen, pleaselet's welcome Cindy Austin.

Thank you, thank you so much.
You have to be here, I know.

It's only taken us what like six months to
finally get to this I forget it,I forget it.
So I just but I first spottedyou on the Speaker Lab and,
ladies and gentlemen, most ofyou, if you've been listening
along, you obviously know thatI'm part of Speaker Lab.
Speaker Lab is an incredibleorganization that helps us find
our voice and then turn thatinto a message for the world.

(05:25):
It's super, super amazing.
But what's really cool about itis all the people that you meet
on the Speaker Lab and justsome smart, incredible people,
and Cindy was one of the veryfirst people, I think.
I noticed you back in February.
I was like I need to like markyou, so I tagged your profile
for me and put it into my CRM.

(05:46):
You know, like, pay attentionto her and, you know, get her,
get her involved and see if youcan get her on the show.
But then when I saw what youwere doing, with lip sync and
with love, I was like, oh wow,this is, I mean, if fear doesn't
come up in your life at all,lucky you.
If it comes to love, fear isthere.

(06:07):
Like there's these two thingswalk, you know, hand in hand on
that cute little beach wherewe're trying to take a romantic
Instagram picture, you know, sotell us.
For those of us who obviouslydon't know enough about you and
what you do and where you comefrom, austin Empowered is the
business and is what you do andwhere you provide it, and I
believe you're also in Austin,texas.

Yes, it is Little play on the.

Little Austin squared.
Take us a little down thejourney of the road that got you
here and share with us some ofthat backstory so we can get to
know you a little bit better.

Well, thank you, and I noticed you too at the
beginning.
You're a bright light of thespeaker lab and people that are,
you know, busy and doing theirthings are the people that that
organization really attracts.
So I'm glad to be here.
Thank you for having me.
And I'd started really the lipsync.
I was a I'm been a therapist,licensed professional counselor

(06:59):
for almost 25 years now and inprivate practice for about 22.
And when I went through my owndivorce it was, I think I was,
you know, 12 years married mysecond marriage.
So here I am, a relationshipexpert, raised, cradle Catholic.
You cannot get divorced in thatworld and I'd already done it

(07:21):
once.
I was really doubling down onthe second one and then make
sure it worked and um, Hell orhot water.
That's right and so and I hadtwo kids with this the second
person.
So I was like this is reallythe thing that I want to focus
on.
You know, the thing that I?
I want to make this work.
And when it didn't work, it wasnot sustainable.
I was devastated.

(07:42):
You talk about fear, devastated.
Oh, so I went through a lot ofshame, guilt, blame, you know
frustration, fear, anger,anguish.
And then, when I finally gotthrough the divorce and dusted
myself off and kind of caught mybreath, I went back out to
start dating and realized it wasa shit show.

Out there, out there.
The dating scene was a shitshow.

It was a shit show dating, and so I I did the you
know the normal whining, peeling, complaining, gnashing of teeth
with all my friends about howbad it was.
And then I went, wait a minute,I can do something about this.
And so I started to poureverything I had into the
program and what my knowledge,my experience, and then I

(08:29):
researched the hell out of itand for probably a good six to
seven months just readeverything I could get my hands
on and and then came up withthis program, lip Sync, tuned in
, turned on transformativedating, and really has been a
wonderful way to turn my messinto a message.

And I think that's the first place I heard
that here it is.
Ladies and gentlemen, I'mwaiting for this gym.

Yes, it did.
I turned my message into amessage Into a message.

I thought that when I heard it I was like, oh,
why didn't I get that?
But, like you know, when we'rein the speaker lab, we all have
to design our, our expertpositioning statement and our
why.
And it's so fun to watch peoplediscover what that is for
themselves.
But when they nail it, likewhen they land on something,
you're like, oh, golden, you cantell the point, just drops.

You can just go boom, that's it, yeah, yeah so.

I was very not jealous because I already have,
you know, making for your friendin the fearless road, which
just really sort of landed sweetfor me because I was very lucky
and blessed that.
These things just sometimes inmy life, whether it's God or the
universe lining up or whatever,it just comes straight through
me and out my mouth, and it'sgood.
Sometimes it comes straightthrough me, out my mouth, and
it's not when I was younger,that's when I got the back of

(09:41):
the hand, but today, when itcomes straight through me,
typically I get some pretty coolstuff.
But when I heard make your mess, your message, I thought I got
to, I got to find a way to usethat.
And I think that's what we doat the fearless road is we?
We look at our mess, we look atthe messy places and the hard
places.
We look at those, the valleys.
You know that we we take andhave to travel through in order

(10:01):
before we get to the mountain,the top of the mountain.
You know the bragging and allthat bold, beautiful stuff at
the top of the mountain thatpeople get to do.
It's wonderful, it's awesome.
Congratulations.
You know we will celebrate yoursuccesses here on this road.
That is what we do, but wecelebrate the small steps.
We celebrate, celebrate, wecelebrate.
Because, celebrate smell right?

(10:23):
Yeah, sorry, I digress the.
We celebrate those small stepsbecause tackling a mountain, it
is the small step every way.
It's 10,000 steps, it's 20,000steps, 40,000 steps to get to
these places.
And most of the time whenyou're reading that magazine
article, you're watching thatpodcast and you're seeing

(10:44):
somebody stand there and brag infront of their Learjet or with
their beautiful eight cars orwhatever it is that they're
doing when they because they'resuccessful.
Now you didn't get to see the10,000 steps, the arduousness
and the getting them dirt andsweating and breaking your back
and crying and bleeding for thebusiness.
The mess, the mess, the messExactly the mess that makes up

(11:06):
the message.
You don't get to see all ofthat, and this is where you
explore a little bit furtherwhat that looks like.
So, speaking of which, now thatwe know a little background
story, but I want to know yourOG story on fear what, where and
when in your life did you?
Do you realize that?
I looked back, like I took mytime.

(11:27):
I looked back because I didsome introspection and stuff and
looked back at my life, andthis is when I was looking at
trying to figure out my why,trying to figure out my expert
resisting statement was.
I had to figure out what, whatmade me tick differently than
everybody else, and the thingspeople were saying about my life
in terms of how I landed on myfeet, how I pivot, how I
reinvent myself, how I handletragedy.
All of those different thingswas coming through to me that I

(11:51):
was doing something differentthan everybody else and I needed
to figure out what it was andwhy.
And that's when I figured outthat my relationship with fear
and my relationship with I wouldsay now, with risk was very
different than a lot of otherpeople and, as a result, I think
I made different choices and,as a result, got different
results.
So for you, do you have anorigin story about when you were

(12:15):
with fear in your life and howit's impacted and shaped the
path you have taken?

You know it comes back to this story about when I
had to go through this divorcewith children.
But I was again raising upTexas on a cattle ranch with one
sister and five brothers oh no.

How did you get a husband?
I'm surprised your brothersallowed you.
They could probably take himout back and beat him to death,
just to make sure they made apoint, you know.

Well, but it was a Catholic family and it was very
much patriarchal.
And so the message you know Igot was your worth, as if
somebody, a man, was going tolike you Right.

Well, yes.

And you know so I was like, oh okay, I guess
that's just the way it is.
And then when I started to grow, through a lot of great therapy
, so the first place of facingfear was going to get therapy
out of a family that wasCatholic.
You just pray about it, turnthat shit over to God and it
should work out.

Have you spoken to Jesus lately?

I know exactly.
So when I really actually gottherapy, I was like wait, these
might be my people.

They're telling the truth.

They're risking, you know, being mad, you know,
or being nervous, or being human.

You mean you get to express your emotions and
your feelings publicly in frontof somebody without being shamed
, guilted or punished.
Concept New concept, yeah.

So therapy was a huge fear place, but I had to go
do, I had to do somethingdifferent, and then it was like
this awesome gift.
So then I thought I had it allfigured out air quotes and so I
picked my first partner.
And I really think, when I lookback, michael, I was really
afraid I wasn't going to getchosen.
Well, I was 31.

(14:01):
And I was in graduate schooland I was like, oh shit, I
thought this just was going towork out.
Maybe it does it.
And so a person came along thatreally thought I was cool, and
so I pretended or thought Idon't think I pretended, I
really thought it was cool.
But the message I've been givenwas you just need to get

(14:22):
somebody to desire you and, likeyou, you don't really care what
you think or what you need.

No, not at all.

That's not really relevant to the form.

Please just be an empty shell for the love of
another.

Yes, and just be the, you know, the martyr almost
.
And we want you to be happy,but not really.

But not too happy.

Not too happy.
Just make sure he's happy.

Oh yes.

Yes.
And so when I had that firstdivorce, that was a ton of fear
and a ton of risk and there'snot a shame in my family and
they ended up deciding not to,you know, exile me.
And so we all made it throughthat and they ended up being
great through that.
And then I got into the secondrelationship and I'd known this
person before, so ding dong,hello and um, and went back to

(15:10):
this person.
But, like I tell a lot ofpeople I work with, there are no
mistakes, everything can beadded to who you are, amplify
who you are.
And so I went in, you know,with this person and we have two
amazing children.
And there I went.
That was the way to go.
It was awesome, until it waslike, oh wait.

(15:31):
So when we went on our firstdate and you were just talking
at me, I was excited because youwere laughing your own stories
and I thought it was so fun.
But I didn't recognize the proyou know the preposition at me,
not with me.
And so that continued to showup as I continued on my path.
And then, as I continued to domy work and grow, I recognized

(15:55):
that he and I had very differentexpectations for what marriage
was supposed to be.
And when I really had enoughsense of self to stand up for it
, I said we need to do somethingdifferent.
And he filed for divorce.
And so you talk about fear,what it was doing to me, what it
was going to do to my childrenthey were eight and 10, what it
was going to do to my finances.
I've been working only parttime taking care of kids, so I

(16:18):
was flooded with fear and prettymuch paralyzed by it, like I
don't have the money he makes.
He ran his own firm, you know,cpa lots of money.
He knew all of that stuff.
Basically, my divorce was amaster's degree in finance
because I knew nothing beforethis shit started.
I was like what?

Which is, you know, so typical with women?
You know the whole.

Well, the patriarchal family, you know
it's like yes, but the wholeparadigm around.

you know marriage, and why it's so
fearful to get divorced and whyit's such a disaster.
If it happens isn't because ofyou, it isn't because of your
partner, it's because a systemwas designed to make it so
difficult for you to walk away,to make it so difficult for you
to be happy in it, that you'restuck with all these, this
residual fallout from a thingyou didn't even create, that

(17:07):
you're stuck with now and youhave to deal with on top of, by
the way, the emotional baggageand the emotional damage done by
these choices.
Right Now, you add all of thattogether, right?
You stir it up into a beautifulsoup pot of dysfunction,
dependency, codependency andbullshit.
Because we don't know how tohave good Sorry, it's true, we

(17:29):
don't know how to have goodrelationships, let alone with
ourselves.
That's the problem is, we'renot invited to know ourselves.
We're invited to changeourselves.
We're invited to be somethingdifferent for somebody, but
we're rewarded for changing andconforming for everybody else,
but never for yourself.

Up until now, as I like to say.

Right, because what Austin empowered in the
house and we're about to bringsome change here at the.
Fearless Road.

Very excited.

So, okay, well then, with that in mind, you're
an entrepreneur, but you're anentrepreneur in love,
relationships, counseling.
In that particular area, You'rea female entrepreneur, a
successful one, who, by the way,has not only recovered from the
losses and the damage and thedifficulty of the divorce and
the changes that that broughtforward, but as a female

(18:18):
entrepreneur, especially intoday's age and with what you
know as a therapist, do you havea philosophy on
entrepreneurship that you couldshare?

Yeah, I really a philosophy about it.
I don't know if you could count.
I don't know if it gets thatlevel of you know stature.
Authority yeah exactly, but forme it was really about being
able to be creative and not haveto.
I had been a teacher for sevenyears, michael, and then have
been an administrator, schoolcounselor, and if we were going

(18:46):
to have one more, everybodyagreed to that last week didn't
think it done, meeting andnothing got done.
I was going to come unglued.
So for me, the responsibilityand the creativity are both
sides of the coin being able tocreate a program and have a

(19:06):
practice and do live calls withpeople that are dating and
create a community around it andplay pickleball a lot To be
able to do the things I wantedto do.
The entrepreneur the engine ofthat, gave me so much creativity
and so much of my ability to gostraightforward and not have to

(19:27):
wait to catch people up.
So for me it's been reallywonderful.
In the spontaneity creativityarena, there is the part where
you know responsibility, likeyou were saying earlier when we
were talking like who's going toget the CRM to work.
Sorry, I don't like that part.
There's that part too, but Ihave learned a ton in the
process.
I mean it's been a wonderfulEducation process.

Sorry, my outlook was on.
Apologize, ladies and gentlemen, please make that note.
If you ever do, tech turn offyour notification.

I did, I did.

That thing's more authentic than the sound of
a notification in thebackground, because you just
don't have your SHIT together.
But it's okay.
This area of love, thisjuncture, if you will this,
where love meets fear and whererelationships meet change.

(20:25):
I don't know what all this is,but if you can't see me, ladies
and gentlemen, I'm doing a lot.
I'm bringing in airplanes, butI'm doing it.
Why this area Like?
Why love and romance?
Why this is a hard place A fora lot of people to be, let alone
express themselves, becausewe're not encouraged to be

(20:46):
vulnerable, which is what Ithink we're changing things.
Brene Brown, thank you verymuch.

Review.

Bringing change and asking for vulnerability,
encouraging compassion andsharing.
Is there something in thisparticular arena that A it
excites you, but B that you seefrom your perspective that's
different than the rest of usmight not be catching onto?

You know that's a great question.
When I sit, I had the privilegeof sitting with couples at
various stages of up, success,stress or duress, and so I've
watched for years and you knowyou can come down to some basics
, that people miss skills, thatthey did not get along the way.

(21:30):
And so when you go into thedating world which I was
stressed back into and yourecognize that I've done this
wrong twice, I've been twopartners you really thought I
knew what I was doing and I wasvery conscious and present all
that and I realized no, not.
And so dropping the water levelon our consciousness is what
this program is designed to doand picture like the tip of the

(21:52):
iceberg and that's really wherewe think you know, that's all we
need.
But when we drop the waterlevel and we get to our stories,
our unconscious traumas andthings that have happened to us
that we just walked away andexiled or compartmentalized with
a headtup or where that weactually could find the lid to
and the sits, keep it over there, you know, when you drop that

(22:17):
water level and you begin toreally look at what those
unconscious beliefs, thoughts,fears are then you can begin to
do something about them.
And then that's the beautifulthing about what I think the
Fearless River does is it talksabout.
It highlights the space ofchoice I have a choice here.

(22:40):
Our recognized fear ishappening Is like you said, we
got to have it.
It's quite the motivate.

Janby?
Oh, absolutely.
Whether you think it'smotivating you or not, it's 100%
motivating you.
Now, if you're being motivatedby fear in a direction to run
away, that's one way.
If you're being motivated bythe fear in a direction to run,
towards something totallydifferent.
But you need to be aware thatthat's what's happening.

(23:06):
And if you're not aware, thisis what happened to me last year
when I was going through thisand I realized I had been asleep
at the wheel of my life.
I had been accidentallystumbling into my success
because I had already adoptedand brought on board several
habits of adapting to change,because my life was chaos when I

(23:26):
was growing up and there was alot of things that were going on
.
So adapting to change was agift I learned to do very
quickly, proved to be the onething that I thought oh no, I'm
not gonna let this define me.
I'm not gonna let that defineme.
I'm not gonna let that defineme.
The act of not letting itdefine me defined me.

So guess what?

53 years later.
You were defined by thosethings.
You were defined by that fear.
You were shaped by theinfluence that it had on the
choices you made throughout yourlife.
Now, some of those choices weregreat and I did a good job with
them.
Some of them were not very goodand my family knows about those
.
But I think when we're out hereand we're realizing that, like

(24:06):
you said, choice is a huge partof it.
If we can please remember thatin every moment of every day of
your life, you have the optionto choose immediately in that
moment who and what you wanna bewhen you show up there, right,
and it's just the next second infront of you, just the next
choice, no, just the next step.
And if you can think about whoyou wanna be when you step with

(24:28):
integrity into that space, thenI think that can be a big game
changer for a lot of us.

The important piece that I have found, though,
is you can notice that you'rehaving a fearful response, which
takes in a lot of what I callnoticing what you're noticing.
It's a huge piece, but whatyou're speaking to I just love,
because I know enough about younow to know that you have
figured this piece out.
Is that, once you recognize thefear, it's like hold up, how

(24:56):
fear, how you dealing with whatyou got for me, instead of
letting it propel you intosomething that it always does.
You actually have befriendedfear and said, hey, what's up
fear?
And then I'm gonna pitch in thebackseat, though you cannot
take the wheel.
You know you get to come, butyou're not in charge of what I'm
doing next and I call that forme the sacred pause.

Sacred pause.

You're really being really able to notice what
From having a reaction.
But, like you said so wellearlier, I didn't even know to
pay attention to myself.
So I guess I was told what doy'all need?
Okay, what do y'all need, youknow?
And um, does small big enough?
Are you happy with that?
Okay, you know, did I cheerloud enough at the football game
that y'all are watching?

(25:41):
So I guess I need to likefootball, which I actually
turned out I did, but it wasn'treally asked.
It was asked and so I didn'tknow.
So for me, the practice reallyhas been of teaching people and
helping people to beauthentically engaged with
another person.
You got to have someauthenticity going on inside
your center of life, live there.

One of the things I listen to motivation,
fearless motivation, which is ayou can get it on Spotify,
amazon, whatever you download iton your app on music.
But these, this guy puts allthis music, this really
inspirational background music,with these live speech, with
these speeches that these peoplegive and Tom bill you, I

(26:23):
believe, is the gentleman thatdid this one in particular, but
was talking about bothauthenticity and integrity, and
he mentions in this beautifulspeech you cannot learn, you
cannot love outside of yourself,you cannot have that.
What you want outside ofyourself, that you want to love,

(26:44):
bring to you or whatever If youdon't a love yourself first, if
there's not worth in your life,and mean that.
And what he meant.
What he says is, when we chasegoals, when we chase dreams,
when we chase things we think ofthat we think have value.
The act that we begin on thatjourney of, of, of accomplishing

(27:08):
, doing, being having somethingnew and better than what we
currently are right now forourselves, is an act of
expressing it self love and selfworth.
I love that when we don't followthrough, in the background,
behind the scenes, when no one'slooking, if you're failing
yourself, you're remindingyourself you're not worthy.

(27:32):
You do that Every time.
Every time you say, oh it'sgonna hit, snooze, I'm not gonna
get up.
Oh, I don't really want tochase that today.
Oh, I don't feel like doing x?
Y on the day.
Every time you compromise yourown integrity by not following
through with the promises you'vemade to yourself, you are
chipping away at your own value.

(27:53):
So when it comes time to stepout in the world, when it comes
time to offer yourself to otherpeople, when it comes time to be
for others something greaterthan what they need, if you want
to step into it, you're notprepared, you don't have what it
takes.
You cannot be successfulbecause you don't love yourself
and you've proven you don't havethe integrity.

(28:15):
And I think that that was sucha powerful acknowledgement of
where we lie as a society,because we're not raised to love
ourselves and be authentic.
We're raised to help, loveothers and show them who they
are by what we give of ourselves, by what we give away of
ourselves.
I shouldn't say that's a littledifferent.

Yeah.

By what we take away from ourselves to give to
others.
So many golden goose out thereare just dying because they're
being raped for their eggs.
You know what I mean.
They're not being appreciated,they're not filling their cut
back up and they're not takingcare of themselves and living a
life of integrity andauthenticity.
So, soapbox moment.
I apologize, langeoma, I get onthis.

I think it's a good point and it makes me you
know the reason why I think,like when you said fear, when
you talk about authenticity andintegrity, I think the word
we're looking for.
I'm going to use it in a smallformula that I use.
It's like if you really tellthe truth that's the first part
of the formula and about whatyou're, where you want to eat

(29:19):
dinner, how you like your coffee, I mean it doesn't have to be a
big truth, but it could be, butit doesn't have to be.
If you tell the truth andsomebody really sees and knows
you, there's fear.
You talk about fear of, okay,so what happens next?
Here's our formula Tell thetruth and people really are
going to see and know you.
In that next minute they'reeither going to accept you or

(29:40):
reject you.

And that's the thing, okay.
So this brings me back to acouple of things.
My brain is flashing back towhen I was 14 years of age, and
I don't know if some of theaudience may know this, but that
was one of my first aha momentswhere I was confronted myself
in front of the mirror after avery bad bully beating.
I had bullies was beating meevery week, it was just a normal
thing, but this particular daywas a very difficult one.

(30:01):
I was dealing with coming outof the closet.
I was dealing withnon-sexuality.
It was 14 years old in 1984 inTexas, and I could not live with
myself lying to people.
I could not grasp.

That's it.

But if you're a teen, pretending to be something
for you and this moment that Ihad, where I could see 20, 20,
30, 40 years of trying topretend to be something
different in order to make youhappy and like me, I wanted to
throw up and die.
I was like absolutely not like.

(30:37):
If you can't like me, f off.
Like I don't need this I'm.
You know there's so many otherpeople out in this world who may
or may not like who I am, but Iwill be damned if I'm going to
chase this down and die on thishill to get you to approve of me
and our teens.
Like no, there's my brain.
Just saw it all in one flash.

That's one of those special moments where I
think, you get a download fromGod, the universe.

Yeah, like a temporary, you know, and I just
saw right through, you know, tothe other side and I was like
nope, we're not doing this.
And I feel like that's what alot of people don't really.
They don't have that choice orthey're not met with that
opportunity.
I apologize for ringing in thebathroom.
They don't have thatopportunity where they get to
see the alternate version ofthis.

(31:27):
Meaning, if you continue downthis path, compromising yourself
for others, and you continue topretend to be something else
for others, whether it's to getthem to like you go on a date
job interview, whatever it is-it is not a sustainable practice
.
First of all, because you can't.
You can't keep up with your ownlies.
And two, it isn't healthybecause what you're doing is

(31:49):
you're lying to the world aboutwho you are and when you start
that process, you're plantingpoisoned seeds into the bad soil
.
Nobody else is doing that.
That may be asking you to.
You may be thinking that theywant you to.

Well, and I think that's what we're saying earlier
, you might not be conscious.
I mean it could be just themilieu you were raised in the
paradigm we're given.

Please everybody .
You know be a people pleaserand I thought that's my success
space.
You know I'm a people pleaser,I can make people happy.

Won't rock the boat.
It's so easy to get along with,or isn't she easy?
It's like, well, if I tell thetruth and you really see and
know me, and then you eitheraccept or reject me, I if.
But if you accept me and Ihaven't told the truth, then the
ultimate result is love and Inever feel loved, even though I

(32:37):
say, oh, we love each other,yeah, we love each other, it's
so great.
But I never felt loved becauseI know I didn't tell the truth,
yeah.

I didn't give you myself.
I gave you a fake version of me.
So when you say you love me,every time you say you love me
is a dig at my heart, becauseyou don't know the real me,
because I didn't let you see it,that's one of my pet peeves.

That's one of my pet peeves and helping people
with dating is is looking attheir profiles.
I'm like, no, this is not a.
I saw your little, your little,your little video on that
checklist ways to improve yourprofile, photograph and dot, and
I was like ooh, tips and tricks, you know like yeah, well,
because when you, because peopleare putting their, they don't
put their full body, they feelthat they're overweight or

(33:21):
they're not the best weight, andthen I'm like, okay, so do we
want somebody to like the realyou?
Cause sometimes that's the realyou and it's, but really trying
to do that out there untilyou've done it in here.
Is it just rearrangingfurniture on the Titanic?
It's going down.

Yes, just rearranging furniture on the
Titanic.
You got two big ones today.
Ladies and gentlemen, you gotto make your mess your message
and stop trying to adjust thefurniture on the Titanic, cause
it's going down anyway, goingdown going down, grab onto a
piece of driftwood.
Do you enjoy the music?
Baby Cause we're all like.

(34:01):
I hope you like a concerto.
So that's all I know, that's it.

That's it Cause we're going under.
It's cold, we are, that is sofunny.

That's a brilliant stuff.

The biggest fear that comes up is is that we're
designed to be attached, I mean,just as a mammal.
I don't care who you are.
We are designed to be attached,to connect, and we come in with
that and then we end up copingwith the best way we know how we
end up with differentattachment styles and then.
But all of us want to be loved.

(34:35):
Yes, we want to be seen, wewant to be known, we want to be
loved for who we are and we'renot going to be loved by
everybody, and that was arevelation to me.
I was like what?
So I remember when I firststarted off as a therapist and I
tried to conform to whateverthe client needed, which we were
taught in graduate school and Ihave left that, by the way,
graduate school, sorry.
And so I'm going to be who Ireally am in this session and if

(34:58):
we're not going to be a fit,there are a thousand other
therapists within 200 yards fromhere.
I'm an Austin, you can findsomebody that would be a better
fit.
But I was so depleted andexhausted and and ultimately
resentful that I got.
Can I say fuck with this client?
Can I say Jesus with thisclient?
Can I?
How can you know?
And it was like, ah, just be meand um, and honoring the

(35:22):
client's pace, honoring theirpersonality, for sure, but just
showing up authentically.
My practice doubled Wow.

And I could try.

I could try and to be what everybody wanted me to
be, and it was quite refreshing.

Yes, it is refreshing.
We see you, I see you.
I think it's very refreshing.
I think that's what resonatedwith me specifically was how,
how you present thatauthenticity in a way that is I
don't want to say it'sunapologetic, because you don't
have to apologize at all, butit's.

(35:57):
It's sort of like this this iswhere I'm coming from and this
is the industry that I'm in, butI'm going to bring this version
of me to the table, um, becausethat's what I can do, that's
the best that I can do, becausebringing the best me is my job.
Like that's what I have to dois bring the best me.
I can't bring the best to youand I can't bring the best to
you and I can't bring the best.
I can bring the best me.
And so that is my biggestpurpose is to make sure that

(36:21):
when we show up for the worldand life and everything else,
the best means there to receivewhatever gifts and opportunities
are coming Right.
And I think that's part of sortof what we were saying on this
journey too, is we weren't there, in present and aware and
available the best version ofourselves.
Because so we weren't receivingthose opportunities, we weren't

(36:41):
seeing them, we weren't hearingthem, we weren't recognizing
them.

Because we didn't know.

No, we didn't know.
And then when you wake up, whenyour ears do pop open right and
you hit that level, you're likeoh, oh, oh, oh, my gosh, oh my
gosh.
And then you know by the timeyou're, you know 50, you realize
, well, there's not enough time,there's not a lot of time left
to to to fix and changeeverything.
But I better get it cleaned upnow because I don't want to

(37:08):
waste the rest of the time Ihave here playing in that
sandbox, playing the that gamewith those people like done not
going to do it.

So I started dating and I dated for really
five years.
Count them right, Count themone.

I can see that's five Yep.

Yeah, five long years, and I took breaks, I had
to reboot and reset andeverything and and really kept
adding each experience to to me.
You know something for me tolearn from.
But the fear that kept creepingup was like, well, again, the
fear that I think initiated myreason for marrying at 31.

(37:48):
First I thought I was runningout of time, so I just did it.
I got desperate.
I was like, oh, I want to havechildren or want to have a
family, what's going to help?
I gotta do this now?
And and really thought that Iwas happy.
It was really not a consciouspart that I didn't.
And so, really, the dating forfive years, fear was a constant
companion of you, might, youmight, never this, might, you

(38:11):
can't make the person come in.
It was like I can, I can, I waslike you, you, you can't.
And so I called it like theshopping, the Amazon shopping
ring of like I want this and apartner, I want this and a
partner, I want this and apartner.
And then I'd thank Johnny Cashfor the ring of fire that just
burns all that away over timeand I got finally to the core of

(38:32):
peace, and and fear is stillthere.
I mean fear still comes becauseI'm alive and breathing.
But in that space it was.
I really imagined that I woke upone morning and that I had left
a like a magically a pad by mybed, and then the morning an
angel had come down and she orhe had written in it you will
never couple again.

(38:54):
And I went okay.
So how would I be living mylife If my greatest fear came
true?
I was like, oh well, itwouldn't be a misdifferent.
I mean I quit dating.
I mean I wouldn't worry aboutit.
I'd just be doing the things Iwas doing.
I'd be investing in thevolunteer opportunities I could,

(39:17):
I'd be playing pickleball, I'dbe hanging out with my friends,
I'd be traveling, I would begoing to visit the ranch, I
would be doing the things thatthat life is.
And then I had a thought okay,so if I woke up the next morning
and the angel had written anote that said you will be
coupled in the next nine months,you'll find your forever person
, how would you be living?

(39:38):
And when I tell people Michael,is it shouldn't be any
different?
None, and when I really facedthe fear which I call the fruit
roll up, a fear, you know, youunpack a fruit roll up.
You have to keep pulling it allthe way out.
It's like what is the fear?
And that was really my fear Iwould never couple, I would
never have my plus one.
I would.
I can't hear you.

Oh, I muted myself when I blew my nose.
I apologize.
I think that's one of mybiggest fears is cause I haven't
dated in 15 years.
I mean, I haven't been withanybody.
And you know there's a wholelot.
I'm sure there's a whole lot ofreasons and things that go into
that.
You know that we could divedown into.
But it's just weird how my lifehas just turned into this sort

(40:25):
of low wolf scenario.
And you know, when I saw, when Isaw you on this, on the, on the
program, and I saw what you didand everything, I had two
reactions.
One was oh my God, I love whatshe does.
Oh my God, I hope she doesn'tknow that I'm single and I can't
.
I don't know if I'll ever findanybody.
Like I can't be a project rightnow because I don't want to be

(40:47):
the focus, so like it was one ofthose things that was like uh,
we better if we go down thatroad, I'm going to be terrified
because I don't know, I don'tknow how.
I haven't been in arelationship I mean been in
relationships and things likethat but I haven't been in a
romantic and a coupledrelationship in 20 years and I
don't know if I know how I keepthinking.

(41:07):
You know it's like what mystepfather always says to me you
can't practice being in arelationship without being in a
relationship, like you've got totry and you have to practice.
Yeah, and then I'm like what doyou do?
Do you just get inrelationships just to practice
being in relationships?
What do you tell the otherperson?
I'm not really in it for thelong term, I'm just practicing
with you because I have no ideaif this is going to work out.
So just want you to know upfront, like how do you, how do

(41:29):
you have that and this is like,I'm just like Evian, please.
Right.
So I thought I just you know,it's always been in the back of
my brain.
So for me this, this show, ismy outreach.
For me this is sort of like,you know, getting to connect
with humans and people andreally make an impact.
But if I could do all of that,do what I do right, I'm going to

(41:51):
change who I am and what I'mdoing.
You know, and have someone onthis journey with me as my
witness for what I'm doing, Ithink that would be amazing too.
I think they'd be really cool.
I think everybody kind of isseeking, to a degree, you know,
is that witness for their lives?

That's a great way to say it that that person that
they can choose to continue touse as a place to heal and grow
and transform and enrich.

Well, speaking of, you know, transforming the
lip sync dating program whicheverybody can find on Austin,
empowered links will be belowLipsydatingcom too.

Yeah, it's on site too.

Lip sync.
What does that mean?
Lip sync?
What is the term?

You know it's weird.
I've been asked that before andwhat I have found is I had it
called deliberate dating andthen when I went to go get it
trademarked the USTPO often, youknow they said you have to do
something more original.
So we tossed around a couple ofthings and I'm the child of the
, you know I graduated highschool in 1985.
I'm 56.
So it was like Millie Vanillywith lip syncing was all fake.

But you remember when you were small.

Now it was like lip syncing was true, yes, but
if it's not a word that I lovebecause, like Austin, my last
name and then Austin, the city Ilike, kind of like that the
plan words, a double entendre oflip sync, if you can really
seek yourself up with who youauthentically are and what you
want for your life.

And what you're saying.

With your lips and who and how it expresses the
integrity that you mentionedearlier.
If that can really come through, if you can sync that up, you
can resonate.
Get on that frequency, Half thebattle is done, because then
you start to attract people atthat same resonance, at that
same frequency.
And so then and everybody lovesto sync their lips when they
consider romance they get tokiss, and so it's got three

(43:40):
meanings in essence, and so Iwent with it and then the tune
then turned on.
Transformative dating is.
A lot of times people look atdating as a as the.
You know, this is the carthat's going to take us to the
new location and the location isthe best part of our trip.
And really this program isteaching that dating in itself

(44:01):
is part of the transformationand healing process and it can
be fun and it can be enriching.
from somebody who did it forfive years that really, really
did not think it was fun at thebeginning, it can be fun and so
really looking at it from a newperspective, I mean it changes
everything.
Like you were talking earlier.

Well, perspective is God.
You know, there's so manytruths, there's so many things
that I learn and have beenlearning along this journey by
asking the questions.
You know, I'm so blessed andlucky that I get to be the
person who gets to sit in a seatand talk about these, these
subject matters.
When it happened to me and Istarted looking and examining it
, I didn't have all the answers.
I still don't, but what Iwanted to know was the

(44:43):
difference.
That's the key.
I wanted to know from otherswhat is your journey with fear?
What is your journey withvulnerability?
What is your journey with thesethings?
How is it impacting your livesand what difference is it making
in the way that we live andchoose to live?
And how, if we begin a dialoguewith with ourselves about this,
can we change the world andchange the way we see ourselves

(45:04):
in it?
And by doing so shifting thatperspective, we shift our
frequency, just like you said.
And by shifting our frequencywe become more in line and
alignment and in tune withharmony the parts of the world
to bring happiness and joy andand and an abundance right, um,
I think that frequency is animportant thing.
I don't know that a lot ofpeople talk about it.

(45:25):
I think it's sort of a youcould be mythical, it can be
mystical, it can be maybespiritual, but not necessarily
religious.
On that line, I don't know ifyou're familiar with the
celestine prophecy.

I love that book.

Oh, talk about frequency, um, finding your,
your way to aligning yourselfwith the frequency of the world
and the planet.
Um, because, as you know,because I, I, I, I, all people
know this statement and thissaying you know, we are all
humans being, not humans doing,we are spiritual beings having a
human experience.

Yep.

And that, if you can remember this, maybe
something you're out there rightnow in your car is driving to
you to work, or you're cominghome from work or whatever, and
you've got a frustrating anddifficult and challenging day.
Remember, you're a spiritualbeing having a human experience.
You're, you're fitting in to aphysical shape and form.
Your resonance, your frequencyis being reduced and shrunk down

(46:23):
, flow down enough to inhabitthe physical form.
I know it's maybe wild and outthere, but it's.
You have to slow down that,that that vibration, long enough
to inhabit a physical form.
For this temporary years, 50, 60, 70, 80 years before you get
released and go back out intothe frequency of the world, of
the universe and in doing so,while you're down here, yeah,

(46:47):
it's going to be hard.
There's going to be times whenyou don't feel like you're
resonating with things aroundyou, you don't feel in balance
or in harmony.
By the way, that can be be inpart because your perspective is
off.
Yes, so you know, if we canhelp with this show and other
shows and talk about this stuff,it could help you clear the
cobwebs, get that filter out ofthe way and embrace an

(47:07):
opportunity where learning andseeing something from a
different perspective and pointof view might just give you that
space you need to A loveyourself a little bit more, have
a little bit more compassionfor yourself and maybe, maybe,
resonate with somebody else andget some late lip-sicking on,
you know.

That's it.
Well, when you say that that'sit, because that was the part
that tuned in, you have to tuneinto yourself first.
Turned on Doesn't mean sexuallyturned on.
It can mean it's another doubleentendre there.
But turned on like animatedwith your truth.

Yeah.

Like alive with your purpose alive with and
awakened, yes, and really.
What your preferences are, whatyour interests are, what your
values are, what your desiresare, all of that you know to
have that turned on in you, andthen it's transformative.

Well, and then I think you know, the turned on.
Sorry to interrupt the turnedon.
Part two, by the way, you know,can also relate to the things
you've turned off in your lifebecause you thought that you
didn't need them, you thoughtsomeone wouldn't like them.

We've shut down pieces of ourselves.

It's time to turn those pieces back on, baby.
It's time to go in there andturn those lights back on, open
those curtains and let thatlight shine in to the parts of
you that you might have beenhiding and be transformative,
because you can't do it withoutit.

Well, when you think about your 14 year old
experience, where you had, youknow, bully, you know daily
basis.
If not, you know weekly daily Imean that's just brutal, and we
didn't have any conversationabout what it was going on back
then and for you to stand up at14.

And no recourse.

Yeah, and no support.
So that's why I live sync.
We have the complimentary calllive every Monday night so that
people can come in and have ashared experience of like oh my
God, I've never revealed who Ireally am on a profile.
I know how to be flirty andcool, but I don't know how to
say anything real.
I don't know how to do it.

Yeah.

What do you do when you finally get somebody
like you catch a fish andthey're taught you know like, ah
, and so there's a place toreally be real and be accepted
and therefore loved, where youget to practice that because you
know you go out on a date andyou're, you're by yourself with
another human being and then youlike what if they don't like me
?
And if there's not a goodsupport system in your life or a

(49:26):
good group of friends or family, it's hard to go out and do
that Sure, and come back homeand be by yourself.
You talk about fear.
It's like, well, there reallyis something wrong with me.

Well, especially , yeah, If we're talking about
two things.
One, I love that you broughtthat up, because my next
question to you was creatingyour ideal partner, which you
mentioned on both the websiteand stuff, which is what you
help people do.
It can create a lot of fear inpeople, but I also think it
would just occurred to me thatyou were talking about going out
on date and sort of it.
What if they don't like me?
What if they would ever?

(49:57):
It occurred to me that that isthe one social situation we put
ourselves in by definition,where the goal coming out of it
is to ensure that someone likesme.

Yes.

Instead of the goal being I better show up with
my most authentic self andbring the best me to the table.
Our focus is on a differentoutcome, and that is to get them
to like me, to ensure thatthey're going to like me.
So what we begin to do is webegin to make assumptions about
areas that we might need to editout and truncate or whatever,

(50:31):
out of fear of rejection, out offear of not being liked, out of
fear of things not going right.
Right, not the practice ofdating, which is just go and be
you and if it don't go, well,that's fine, date another and
practice again until you getcomfortable in expressing
yourself and you're not sonervous.
Right, right, we don't get.
There's no practice dating spaceschool scenario you go through,

(50:55):
you throw that in the world andyour parents like go on a date.
Like who teaches you this stuff?
You didn't watch your parentsday, god knows, you didn't want
to.
They certainly don't want toknow anything about it.
You know what I'm saying?
We had this weird, you know,ick and gross, or parents, you
know, and some of our parentswere great and they were amazing
lovers and they had incrediblecommunication and we as kids

(51:16):
don't also don't see that.
So it's not taught in highschool.
It certainly isn't taught inschools today, god knows.

Well, they've got taught in movies and TV and
books.

No, no, that's romanticizing Hollywood and
fairy tales.

I mean it's the.
There's no place really to goget it.

Very rare.

I really felt that there was a.
It was a need that we need toevolve how we date, and so
dating evolution instead ofevolution, and evolution is
really what I'm about.
And think about this.
Look at how much we know aboutfood, diet and eating now that
we did 30 years ago.

And we're still the fattest, unhealthiest and
most drugged up nation in theworld.
Thank you.

Thank you very much, and but we didn't know
about GMO, we didn't know aboutcarbs, we didn't know about
sugar addictions.

I mean we really you say we didn't, but the
people selling it to uscertainly did.

Yes, but so that's what I'm saying.

Hollywood and fairy tales are selling us that
version of dating, and they'reselling us an imaginary version
of ourselves in a world thatdoesn't exist at a time.
That isn't real, it's all-.

Well, you see, these kids and people that brand
themselves on Instagram andthey put their cap on and they
take their picture and they gosporty self and I'm like you've
never played a sport in yourlife, you just branded yourself
as a way for people to have animage of you.
So, therefore, they didn't tellthe truth.
They can't be seen and knownthere, will be accepted, but
they'll never feel loved becausethey didn't tell the truth, and

(52:47):
so it's really creating a space, as you do the ideal partner
blueprint, of what truly Peopleare like.
I don't think I can do an idealpartner blueprint.

It seems too scary and they're scary is it
because Wait, why would you bescared to write down your
preferences for the best person?
Hello, I don't want to manifestperfect.
I don't want to mess that up.

I might put something wrong Like hello Well
there is that too, and I do seethat.
But there's another level of it.
It was like well, I'm notperfect, I need to allow the
other person to be important.

Because the act of writing down what I would
expect and want from my partnersuggests that if I'm fallible, I
don't have the right to askthis.

Thank you, thank you that was well said, that's
tweetable, that's it Right there, that's it Hashtag.

Get that ladies, put that caption up.
That's going out to socialmedia.

That is really it.
A lot of people don't believethat if they do that, that they
deserve to do that.
So they, and they feel thatthey would be too arrogant to
ask for their ideal partner.
I said no, no, no, you can'tstart with your ideal partner.
There is no perfect person.
You're not perfect, I'm notperfect.
That's not even on the menu.
But if you can't really getclear about it and people really

(54:03):
truly Michael, they just getstymied at that point.
So I created a tool for peopleto use so that they can figure
out a way to do it differently,and the tool is nobody has a
problem with this and I go intodetail in the program, but I
want you to make a list of allthe things you never want to
think, feel or experience inrelationship.

(54:23):
Again, if you go like, how muchpaper and time do I?

have.
You have right, because we'veall been through it.
I was going to ask this nextquestion, which actually was
teasing into it, was what's themost common for you to see
around dating in your thing?
And I wonder if that's it thatthe very act of bringing my
authentic self to this situation, which feels impossible to do
because I've never actuallyknown who that is and I don't

(54:47):
know how to do it coupled withthe idea that I now need to
write down and ask from you, theuniverse or whatever, what it
is I want, and a perfect partner, when I can't even tell you who
I am, I can't even be honestwith myself, let alone bring it
to you.
And now I'm going to tell youwhat I want from you is an act
of lies.
You're literally, you can'ttell anyone what you want

(55:09):
because you, you don't even knowyourself to make that demand,
to make that ass.

That's it, that's all I'm saying.
Is like to really sess that out, and a lot of us know how we
don't like to be treated.
But we but again, if we weretaught to be, you know, people
pleasers, diminish ourselves,deny our needs and really don't
talk about Well, no conflict,Any of us can sit there and
write down yeah, I don't like tobe kicked by my owner.

Stepped on is fine because you know that
doesn't hurt as bad.
You know like, but that's allwe know.
When all you know is beingkicked and bullied and all you
know is the bad parts, andthat's what you, that's what you
use to set your baseline forwhat your expectations are.
You might actually allowsomeone to walk on you.
You might allow somebody to,like, wipe their feet on you and
not respect you.
You might allow these thingsbecause you don't realize A that

(55:58):
you have the right to ask forsomething better.
B you don't love yourself andknow that enough to know that's
your job, that's yourresponsibility.
To love yourself.
That's your role here on thisplanet.
When God sent you down here isto be the best version of you
you can possibly be, and thatincludes loving yourself.

Yes, and, and, and that.
I think what we you know wemiss along the way is we desire
so much to belong and to beattached, connected, that the
tribal, primitive part of ourbrain says well, amend yourself
so that they'll keep, they won'tkick you out.
I mean, it's very primitive.

Well, that's fitting in, not belonging.
Not fitting in is when you editthe pieces of yourself to get
into something.
Belonging is when you have todo nothing and they love you
anyway.

That's thank you.
Another treatable, that's it.
Right, mark those?
That's the moment, those arethe moments, because that's the
difference.
And so when you don't know thatthe waterline has not been
dropped on your consciousnessand you're just going along the
best way, you know how everybodyelse, at 31, is getting married
, I guess I need to do something.
Oh, what's wrong with me?
What's wrong with me?

(57:04):
Fear?
There's the fear.
What's wrong with me?
What do I need to do?
To mend myself, like you said,edit myself so that somebody
else would be okay with me.
And then we never really feelloved, we just settle, and then
nobody wants to be the settlerand no one wants to be settled.

No one wants to find out.
You settled.
You're like, oh really, yousettled for me and I didn't know
, I did that in my firstmarriage.

I really was humbled.
I did not know I did it.
I was afraid, as I was, of notbeing with my peers or what my
family expected of me at 31.
It's like, oh, I'm in a smalltown I can't make.
I was in, I didn't get mygraduate degree.

Danton, yes.

Let's do this, unt Eagles.
Oh, I was.

TW.

But I couldn't make people come in.
I mean, we didn't have onlinedating, we didn't have apps.
I was like well, I'm not goingto find them at Target or on
campus.
It was a women's university,what?
So I was like, where am I goingto do?
And so it was a panicky thing.
That fear makes us makedecisions that are not choices.

(58:18):
They are reactions.

Yes, this is where I was when I was exploring
how it influences our lives.
It is forcing us into makingdecisions and choices we
wouldn't normally make, becausewe're making them out of fear.
Yeah, we're making them in afrom a place of fear.
That's one thing I've alwayslearned about myself.
If I make a choice and adecision based from a place of

(58:41):
fear, it's always wrong, it'salways bad, it never works.
No, and if you know that aboutyourself, I mean really truly
know that about yourself, whenyou feel that you're coming from
a place of fear and panic,which I just had, I'm sorry, I
just had a fear.
I'm in the studio which is outat the ranch and we're on the

(59:03):
mountains and we're in themountains and I have this
decorative shelf with basketsand things and everything.
Something crawled down a spider, massive.

A pranchelous size .

I mean, it's big , that's a big, that's a big boy
.

Keep your eyes on him.

I'm going to keep my eyes on him because I
could see him over there.
I just feel like not that I'mterrified of spiders, but they
creep me out.
Anyway, back to the show.

It's primitive response.

Exactly, it is my what is it Not my?
Amyloid.
My what is it?
Amyloid?

outer world.
My amygdala Make the love.

Yeah, that's a different A word, anyway.
So, yeah, these things.
I think if you know that you'recoming from a place of fear and
you're making a decision, it'salways going to be wrong.
So remember that about yourself, if that's anything that you're
ever coming Just speaking of.
Let's move forward a little bit.
Now that you've got thebusiness you've got, you've
developed this pathway, you'vegot lip sync, you've got clients

(01:00:02):
and people that you work with,you've learned some things.
What are some of the threebiggest challenges you think you
face currently?
Knowing what you know, learningwhat you've learned and now
moving forward.

Cindy Austin (01:00:16):
As an entrepreneur or in lip sync or with the-.

Michael Devous (01:00:19):
Well, any one of them, Something that stands out
for you right now, I think, asan entrepreneur.
I think that includes yourbusiness and encompasses that
whole, what you built as abusiness.
So it can include the lip syncpart of it.
Have you learned anything majorfrom that that we should know.
That will give us a littleinsight to like what are we

(01:00:39):
doing wrong?
What do we need to fix?

In the dating world.

Yeah.

Oh yeah, well, for me, I think it's really about
exactly what you just saidearlier.
It was ideal partner blueprint.
You've got to.
If you come up to the pokertable and you only have 10 chips
and I'm gonna play with you andyou've got 200, who's gonna
have more freedom in betting?
Who's gonna take more risks?

(01:01:05):
Who's gonna be more vulnerable?
So the person that has the morepoker chips are gonna do that,
and I'm gonna be more inscarcity, and so what I've
learned really is that shiftingmy mentality always to a choice
of abundance, and so whenscarcity is really there and I
call it scarcity and it is alocation that I really feel I go

(01:01:28):
to and I just like startcounting my 10 chips and I don't
know what I can do, and I do itin my practice, I do it in my
lip sync.
I'm like how much time do I have?
There's not enough time in theday, you know.
Whatever, it's a scarcitymentality and so leaving
scarcity is a real thing thatI've.
It's a practice.
I continue to practice andheading towards what I call the

(01:01:49):
dance abundance, the dance ofabundance.
And going to that place andrecognizing, okay, what if there
is enough time?
What if you do have enoughenergy?
What if there is enough CRM,something that out there that
knows how to do my CRM for me?
You know what if you know whatif that's out there?
So really shifting fromscarcity to abundance is a

(01:02:11):
constant thing, because fearcomes up.

Well, renee Brown was talking about this too
and she mentioned that we livein a society right now, in a
culture of scarcity, that themessaging that we get, the
bombardment of information andstimuli, the politics that we
live in, the climate not justphysical climate and weather

(01:02:34):
climate, but the climate of ournations, our relationships with
each other, the divergentbehavior that has been presented
to us over the last severalyears, is a culture of, and the
messaging of, scarcity and fearthat we sort of are stewing in,

(01:02:54):
we're simmering in it daily.
You know, if you don'tdisconnect and separate yourself
from that deluge of informationlong enough to re-center and
rebalance and that's, I think,what a lot of people are trying
to do seek it in, whether it'syoga, meditation, whatever they
gotta do to like, get thatbalance back.
Remember, every time you tunein and turn on something, you're

(01:03:18):
inviting in that energy from aTV, your radio, whatever it is.
And this is somethinginteresting you might, people
may not know Celestine, I think,talked about this.
When you talk about thefrequency and stuff, they talk
about frequency of plants andfrequency of things in nature
compared to the frequency ofthings that humans have
developed and designed, if youput them on a scope, those
little frequency scopes, you cansee how angled and sharp and a

(01:03:44):
lot of this frequency that weget from things is negative.
It's not in balance and inharmony with our physical selves
and the frequency that ourphysical bodies give off is
actually more in tune withnature in a tree than it is with
a television and a TV show.

Like how it is.
I think that's cool.
Yeah, I think paying attentionto that is huge and noticing
what frequency are you on andwhat?
Are you in scarcity?
There's a frequency.
Are you in abundance?
There's a frequency.
And again, if you drop thewater level, you have a choice.

Well, I don't know that.
We realize humans have anelectrical impulse.
We have electrical impulsesthrough our entire body that
operate and run our heart andour brain and everything else
our brains firing all the timewith electrical impulses.
Those electrical impulses aregiving off a frequency wave,
they're giving off a vibrationright.
And if you're doing things inyour life that go against your

(01:04:45):
own vibration, if you're takingon things in your life that go
against your vibration, youcould be sick, you could get a
migraine, you could be unhealthy, you could get overweight, you
might not getting the nutritionthat you need, you might be
involved in bad relationships,making poor choices, all of
those different things.
Now, think about that.

(01:05:08):
You're already there.
You're doing that right.
You're now changing andshifting your vibration to adapt
and adopt these things thataren't good for you.
But what does that do to theworld outside?
It draws to you other thingsthat are of that like and
similar vibration, which meansyou are now drawing scarcity,
you're now drawing fear, You'renow bringing more of it to you,

(01:05:31):
because that's what yourvibration's giving off, right?

Yep to attract yeah exactly.

So I don't mean to get too mystical and sort of
weird about it, but I think it'sa real thing that I don't think
we think about when we're inthat place of scarcity.
We are now giving off.

Emitting a frequency.
You are emitting a frequency,there's a way.
So you ask one of my challengesthat I would say.
I think one of my biggestchallenges right now is and this
is a belief system that I couldcheck in myself, so but there
seems to be, and I'm doing itright now we are creating a
podcast, so but the amount ofenergy required to continually

(01:06:16):
put a voice out there, trying tomarket or share of, trying to
serve, trying to get my messageout there, can absolutely
exhaust me, whether it's posting, whether it's responding,
liking, following, creatingcontent and then putting the

(01:06:37):
content out there and thenresponding to the content.
It's like to me that continuesto be a big challenge and it
flies in the face of theauthentic part, because it feels
like look at me, look at me,hey, hey, look at me, and I know
that there's a lot of peopledoing really good things out
there that aren't having that,that kind of narcissistic or

(01:06:59):
self-centered or look at me onlypurpose, but there's so many
that are that putting my voiceout there, competing with that,
has been a challenge for me.
It feels hard.

It feels disingenuous.

That's it, yeah.

Yeah I'm it doesn't have to be, no, no, no,
and I'm with you.
I you know this part.
I love getting on the call.
Doing the interviews like thisis my zone.
I am happiest and feel verybalanced and very relaxed and
very cool and very whatever likein this space doing this.
Then we get off of this andit's now post-production time
and I gotta take these and editit, clip and dot and do the

(01:07:39):
social media posts and this, allthose different businessy
things.

Yep.

Around the dream .
Like you know, the dream partis fun, but then you gotta do
all the other stuff you knowaround it.
And while I'm good at it and Iunderstand it and I've been
doing it for many years and Ihave that experience, it still
is.
It feels a little slightlydisingenuous, right you?
Do feel like I feel like Ishould be paying someone to do
that part so that I'm free toactually enjoy doing it.

This part where you feel most resonance, where,
you feel most alive.
But I think, as an entrepreneurand you well know, I mean
that's part of the braidingtogether, of all the parts, and
so we'll bring in perspectiveagain it's just how I continue
to look at it.
You know, I have to decide tolook at it as a gift and a
privilege that I get to do it.

(01:08:28):
But that is a kind of awha-wha-wha.

It's kind of a but Well, and then you know we,
as entrepreneurs, we're jackingjails of all trades.
You know what I mean.
We bring to the table a numberof skill sets and experiences,
that we culminate our mess intoa message and then we try to
deliver it to the world.
In order to do so, as anentrepreneur, you have to be an
innovator, you have to be acreator, you have to operate

(01:08:53):
from a place.
A certain amount ofvulnerability is required in
order to put yourself out there.
Your ideas, your thoughts, yourcreativity, your services, your
goods.
You're putting it out there atrisk that it will be rejected.
In fact, this is one of thebiggest stepping you know to
step out into the world withwhat you think you know and what
you think you wanna give peopleand then risk them saying I

(01:09:14):
don't want it, it is the that'srejection 100%.
Absolutely, and I thinkentrepreneurs deal with this on
a daily basis with theunderstanding and the knowledge
that you're going to be turneddown, you will be rejected, but
I think what we understand aboutthat that's different than
other people.
We already know this and we'recomfortable with it.

(01:09:34):
We know we're gonna fall, weknow we're gonna fail, we know
we're gonna get bruised andwe're gonna get hurt.
We know this is not easy, butthere's a teeny, tiny, little
part of us.
It's still that little boy andthat little girl on the
playground dreaming about beinga superhero, dreaming about
being a cop, dreaming aboutbeing in a space program.

(01:09:55):
Because we're dreamers, we'rehuge.
We cannot stop the dream, wecan't stop the creativity.
It's just part of who we are.
And when you try to balancethose two things where we've got
the chaos and the drama on thisside, it's like.
It's difficult, it'schallenging.
You can fail, people willreject you.
All the big what if?
Scenarios and fears that mightcome in with the dreamer and the
creator who want to do more inthis world.

(01:10:17):
We live in this tension spacein the middle, like we live in
this little zone of tension ofthe tug of war between you might
not, you might what goes wrong,but what if it doesn't Like?
This is where we are, andhaving resources and people like
you to help us especiallynavigate the tension area

(01:10:38):
between romance and our lips aswe try to get them in sync with
our hearts I think that could bevery challenging, but I'm very
glad that we have you as aresource, that people can have
you as a resource.
I think that's reallyincredible, the work that you're
doing.

Thank you so much.

You're very welcome.
So, speaking of those things,three things, maybe two things,
so that you would love theaudience to take away and
remember, if you have a littlepiece of advice that they could
get this afternoon, that it'sfree right now.
Ladies and gentlemen, if youare hearing this, not gonna be

(01:11:18):
that way, but you can get thislittle piece of advice right now
because you tuned in.
So do you have something?

I think, if I could just imbue anybody
listening that's looking atdating, is that if you look at
dating as a process to help youheal and transform your thoughts
, your consciousness, yourreactions to things, your mental
story about scarcity orabundance, if you use it as a
process to transform yourself,enrich yourself and heal

(01:11:47):
yourself, it's a win.
You're out there connectingpeople, you're not missing
anything and, like you said, wehave few years here, and so
let's go ahead and use our timehere to really grow, develop,
heal, transform, and it has somefun while we're doing it.
It's like there's this thething I wish somebody had told

(01:12:09):
me is what I my dad never.
He tried to tell me how to date, but again he told me make sure
the guy has fun, so you know.
So I would say whether it's ayou know, a gay relationship or
a straight relationship orwhatever, pay attention to how
you feel in this other person'spresence, and you've mentioned

(01:12:32):
that before.
It's like we were taught to goto the interview and put your
best foot forward, which impliesthere's a clubfoot we're
dragging behind this, and sodon't look at that one though.

Which implies nobody wants to see the other
foot.

Yes, it's deformed , it's gross, it's gotten a
chronic flash and might stink,and so what we wanna do is we
want to bring all of ourselvesand really be okay with the scum
part of ourselves and thebeautiful flower part of
ourselves.
If you can embrace thosetogether and hold that space

(01:13:07):
like set your feet if you'reinto sports, really set your
feet and just hold both of thoseas you go forward, I think that
you're gonna be vibrating in afrequency that's gone to attract
more people doing the very samething.

I love that because it when you realize that
, by stepping fully into thatspace where you're now acting A
in your best interest, you'renot self-centered, you're
self-interested and you'representing an authentic version
of yourself vulnerable,available, but also at risk.

(01:13:45):
I don't know enough aboutmyself to know whether or not
I'm gonna be good at this, and Ineed to practice with you, and
I'm inviting you to practicewith me.
You are, then changing thefrequency of the situation and
thereby attracting to you nowindividuals that will and
hopefully will resonate withthat version of you.

Yes, one of the modules, the last one, and they
don't have to be taken in order,but they are designed to go in
order.
But it talks about recognizeand rewrite the patterns that no
longer serve you.
And so when you go out on adate, or you're getting ready
for a date, or you're looking atputting a profile up, or what
is your story?
What?
Is the pattern, what's thenarrative?

(01:14:25):
What are?

you saying to yourself I have talked about
this, it's in my speech, it's inmy work, it's in my blogs.
What story are you tellingyourself?
Because that's one thing humansdo Other than dream and other
than you know, wanna bepartnered and wanna have
connection in this world.
We tell ourselves stories, welove stories, and if you are

(01:14:49):
telling yourself a narrativethat is not in alignment with
who you are, it's pretty hard tolive a good life.
I would think it's gonna bepretty difficult and challenging
.

It is.
And then something that we saidearlier that I'm gonna come
back to is that we have thesethoughts.
They're automatic.
Fear is automatic, which wetalked about.
It shows up, it's there, butthen if you have that sacred
pause, that space right after it, to say up until now I was a
bad dator, up until now I gotreally nervous and sweated a lot

(01:15:20):
.
Up until now I picked peoplethat were addicts, or I picked
people that were assholes.
Up until now I didn't speak upand reveal who I was Up until
now, and those three words, Ithink, are neurolinguistically
powerful, like the trains go inthis way with that narrative and

(01:15:41):
then up until now it justchanges course immediately and
it opens up possibility, and itopens up hope, and it opens up.

It opens up neuroplasticity.
It means your brain can now seeopportunities or at least allow
for the suggestion of adifferent path, of new
opportunities and new ways tomove forward.
Because you're giving yourselfpermission in the statement of
up until now A I've learned allthat stuff, I got it behind me,

(01:16:09):
it's at my back, I can use it inany of those tools.
And B by saying up until nowyou're putting, you're placing a
marker between then and whatcomes next.
And you're suggesting that inthe what?
comes next area.
After this new, after thisbetter, after this improved.

Maybe, 10%.

you know, maybe Miller Lite, not Miller Regular.

Yes, you know, one thing that I think that I would
love for everybody to know iswe were raised in the school
system, most of us in the publicschool systems, or really in
America, where we're trying towin, who has the answer?
And you raise your hand first.
It's me, I have it, and so weweren't really taught the growth
mentality, we were taught thefixed mentality.

(01:16:56):
You either have the answer andyou're good and you get the A or
the gold star, or you'reblessed then, and so, going into
dating as a learner with thegrowth mentality, with, like we
were saying earlier, you don'thave to be finding your next and
last partner ever.
It's a lot of pressure.
I saw much pressure, so goinginto it with a close mentality.

Without, I'm gonna learn something here I can
learn something about myself orlearn something about somebody
else today.
Yeah, exactly.

So that's really what I would leave people with
too, and that's what I reallywant.
It takes a lot of the pressureoff.
It creates a space for you tobe more authentic, because
you're coming at it from a placeof I'm learning something about
myself and about you, and thisactivity or this restaurant or
this space that we're gonna bein, you're like, oh, I can do
that.
I don't have to be on O thefirst time Bono hit the stage he

(01:17:45):
was not Bono.
No, you know it was like it waslike you were saying is we don't
see all those steps ahead oftime.

Yeah.

You know, but so it's just giving yourself
permission to be willing to be alearner.

Yes, and because you know, when you meet me, you
meet me now, you meet theversion of me that's here, like
you meet what, what?
Everything that came before youdon't get to see, but you get
to meet this version of me andyou know, I feel compelled in
those situations to share somuch because I'm like, oh, but
you know, this is how I got hereand it's like my life was crazy
and I've done all these thingsand da, da, da, da.

(01:18:20):
But it's like you know whatthey?
They don't never know thatperson.
I won't know that personanymore.
I've changed from thoseindividuals.
I've shifted and moved on andI've become somebody different.
That doesn't have any bearing.
I mean, there's a slight, Isuppose, influence to a degree,
but it really doesn't have anybearing on who I am today and
what I share with you now can be100% different and authentic

(01:18:41):
than it was before, because it's, it's now my choice.
And if I recognize that thatchoice is available to me, I
guess the other side of it isyou have to realize that by
making that choice, activelychoosing to bring the authentic
version of yourself, you'reallowing for the other person to
bring theirs to.

So there's some compassion.

there there's some understanding.
There there's, you know.

Yeah, yeah, and allowing there to be a softness
about it, a willingness, abeginning, a becoming as you go
into it, versus a becoming.
You know, what we were taughtis are you hot?
Are we attracted to each other?

Yeah, yeah, yeah .

Yeah, I guess we're we're a good date.
Let's move on.
It's like we lose so much ofthe flavor of what the
relationship is designed to helpus know about ourselves when
we're younger, we're driven bythe hormones.

I mean, my gosh, I just think about.
I mean I was a Randy littlebastard, you know what I mean.
I, just as long as you met thephysical preferences that my
brain was telling me probablywasn't my brain telling me, but
you know, like I was like, yeah,that dude, you know, and so,
and for me now it's sort of likewow, I don't think I did it

(01:19:52):
anyone, because I liked them.

There you go and that's the transaction.
That was it happening versusthe transformation it was just
transactional.
You'll make me not feel lonely.
You'll make me feel like, well,you're hot, so I guess that
must be hot.
That makes me feel good.
You know, it's like it's notransformational content
whatsoever.
It's like going through andeating cotton candy and you go,
I'm full, Like yeah, but therewere no nutritional value in

(01:20:17):
that cotton candy.
But you're full, but it's justnot good for you and your
dentist is gonna hate it.
So when you focus on this, it'sreally about what you're saying
, what's the new, what's thenutrition, and what do you get
out of it.
How do you feel in thisperson's presence?
Not just do they like me,Exactly, and so so moving we're.

I mean, this is we're heading into the fall.
It's coming out September 2023,slowly rolling out.
This is slowly coming to an end.
Any specific milestones orgoals that you have in mind for
the rest of 2023, or maybe goinginto 2024, we should know about
.

In 2024,?
That's a great question I'mlooking at.
Each one of the modules has aworkbook to go along with it,
because the feedback from peopleis there's just so much in our
live conversations.
We need to have something towrite on and, as I'm teaching,
we need to take notes, and thefeedback has been could you put
that into a book?
And I'm like, oh, that'd be fun.
And it to be an interactivedating workbook, cause a lot of

(01:21:17):
concepts are here which I hearwith people in practice, but how
do they translate?
How do you get them into yourlife?
How do we do dating differently, not just think about it.
It's like actually getting inthe pool and swimming versus
reading about swimming.
It's like what, what, whatwould it look like?

Do you remember the artists way?

Yes, oh, I love that book.

I love that, that journey, you know, and it
just had, it just occurred to me.
I just had this vision of youknow, you, you would the new you
know lip sync book or whateverthe.
You know that that people wereshowing up at a cafe, each of
them with their little datingnotebook, and their job was to
hand their dating notebook tothe other person and the other
person was to write an entry init unknown, not talking or

(01:22:01):
anything, just an entry in thein the dating book and then hand
it back and not say anythingabout it, not read it or do
anything until the end of theday, and then they get to see
what did you write, you know, atthe beginning.

That's a cool idea .
That was a download, I thinkyou just got one, I think you
just got one.
They were all witnessing adownload.

That was a good one.

That's awesome.
Yeah, but one of my dreamswould be to have the lip sync
badge on you know the top datingapps that if you were to go
look at an app and there wouldbe you've done Lip sync approved
.
Yes, then that would be likeokay, this person's serious,
they've done some work, theyspeak the same language.

On the profile.
You could see it on theirprofile.
So you know they've done thelip sync trial or whatever.
Then they know you've done somework and some homework.
You know the same thing in AAand Al-Anon and the 12 step
program.
You know, a lot of those peoplewho go through the program and
stuff utilize the steps in orderto help them navigate
relationships which I've.
You know, my both my parents,my mom and my stepfather were in

(01:23:01):
the program for many years andthey always talked, program,
program talk.
When we were talking abouttheir relationships they used to
think, god, that's sounromantic, but at least they
knew each other.
You know what I'm saying.
They had the ability to speakand talk openly with one another
in a language that actually, ohwait, communicated their
feelings, you know.

(01:23:23):
So I think that's somethingthat, like you said, most people
don't have it learned to do andthey need to learn to do.
So the program like that wouldbe really cool.
I think that'd be amazing, youknow.

And another thing that fits that too is that my
trainers from the couplesInstitute, ellen Bader and Pete
Piersen they do training forcounselors that work with
couples and I said, oh my gosh,I did not know this, but I did a
developed lip-sync before I gotin the program.

(01:23:54):
I was like I developed a datingprogram using the developmental
model without even knowing thedevelopment.
So now I'm looking to teach onthere with them and really show
other therapists how to teachother people how to use a
developmental model, cause, likeyou said, you're like oh how
en-romantic.
But it's really there's thebeginning, when you get that

(01:24:16):
gooey good limerence, thechemical cocktail in your head
of being a couple, and thenpeople don't like the second
level, which is differentiation,which is where you really have
to be authentic.
You should be doing that allalong, and really being
authentic and telling who youreally are takes skills of
dealing with conflict.

Well, because we spend what A 95% of our energy
and our time at the beginning isto try to find ways we match.
How do we get along?
What things do we like that arein common?
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
We never go through the partthat goes whoa, how are we
different?
And we don't get to that partuntil after we usually have gone

(01:24:55):
pretty far down the road.
And now we gotta share thedifferences.
Now we gotta explore the spacesthat don't make sense.
Now we gotta go.
I sleep on the left side of thebed.
No, I do.
I sleep on the left side of thebed.
Like, how are we ever gonnamake this work?
Well, we're gonna have to havetwo beds.
Like you know, it's not gonnamake any sense.

Should we put your hand over or under?

Oh, over, over, over, over Over.
So, yeah, there's.
You know.
I think we don't bring thedifferences what makes us
different and what's unusual andunique and what I've discovered
is that people that have longlasting, really good
relationships are the ones thatdidn't have the romance up front

(01:25:35):
but had the understanding andthe camaraderie and respect up
front, and then that romancebeautifully like just blossomed
and became this nice warmblanket that was covering
everything.
Later on I thought that wasthat's pretty cool.
I was not envious, but justsort of like it'd be amazing to
have that sort of longunderstanding of each other,

(01:25:56):
this sort of intimate knowledgethat they know you so well and
you know, and a respectful ofcaring about it.
You know which.
I feel like that's what we'reall seeking.
Is that what we can find if wecome and get help from Lip Sync?
We can learn to be our betterselves and to find love.
Hopefully one day.

Yes, well, and again, like I said, with all
transparency, when you'reemitting on a frequency of,
you're living your badass juicylife as it is about your
business, your purpose, butwanting, I mean.
I could never turn off thewanting to be connected to
wanting to couple.
I didn't want to turn it off.
It was the true, authenticexperience that I wanted to have

(01:26:37):
.
And then, five years in, Ifound Joel and then he was like
whoa dating a therapist isdifferent.

I was like yeah, well, we have some serious
complications from the start.
Is there a journal in a pen inevery part of the house.
This is very strange.

See when you said bring the book and share it
right in it was pretty much thatthat was like yeah, and so
really being able to allowmyself to tell people it's a
process.
I don't have it down perfectly,I can't make somebody come in,
but if you're gonna date, let'sdate consciously.

Yes, thank you.
If you're gonna live, liveconsciously, if you're gonna
date consciously.

Like hello, let's intentional have some intention,
thank you, we must haveintention.

Oh God, this is such good stuff.
I mean, ladies and gentlemen,we've got some good nuggets and
gems on this show today, somereally incredible things.
I hate to have to wind this upbefore I let you go.
One of the things that we do weask our guests, obviously, to
get vulnerable and share some oftheir experiences.
We also invite and let ouraudience know that vulnerability

(01:27:40):
is a crucial and missingelement to, I believe, balance
and success and happiness in oursociety today.
Thank you for being vulnerableon the show and sharing your
journey with us.
How do you think vulnerabilityplays a role in on your a, your
fearless road, but also withromance?

Yeah, that's a great question and sometimes
people take that understandingand they really resonate with
vulnerability and then they tellthey overshare.

Ah, yes.

And so there's a balanced place between really
being able to know beingvulnerable is really being
present, emotionally engaged,accessible.
Not vomiting your entire lifesecrets in the first day and not
talking about all of your abusefrom the beginning or
everything that went wrong inyour last marriage, your

(01:28:34):
relationship.
You know it's like.
It's like make sure that otherperson and I think Brené Brown
says this make sure the personis worthy of your story.

Oh, yes, she does this.
She says make sure you're withsomeone who's worthy of your
story.
Make them earn the right toknow the vulnerability.
Yeah.

And being vulnerable like.
I would say I always wanted tosay I noticed every time I was
like I want to say I wasdivorced once, because if you
say your voice twice, peopleimmediately judge you.
Quickly, they make a big snapjudgment about you.
And so I had to really practiceholding on to my little girl
and going, yeah, I've had twodivorces and if you want to know
more about them I'm happy toshare it.

(01:29:12):
But I was going to be authenticfrom the beginning.
But most people are prettyrespectful and don't ask a ton
of questions or a journey.
But I think vulnerability isauthenticity, it's another word
for it.

It's like.

here is my authentic self Sometimes I'm
scared, sometimes I'm nervous,sometimes I'm under-resourced
and petty and small.

I think it's and to me maybe I can phrase this
it was occurring to me thatvulnerability is not when I
share.
Vulnerability is when I'm inthe presence of someone, where
I'm allowed to be myself.

Yeah.
You know, I don't have to.
That's what we want.

I don't have to say anything, but I know I'm in
a safe place, no matter who I'mwith, and that, to me, is like
real vulnerability.
You don't have to sayeverything and share everything.
I mean, in fact, as I get older, like I think about dating
people right now, you know, andI'm 53 and I'm thinking I don't
want to know your whole past,Like I don't think I'd be
interested in all those storiesand you know what.

(01:30:15):
We got a few years to talkabout this.
So why don't we ease this out?
You know, god knows, you'regoing to be telling that story
at the dinner table when thecousins and the guests are over
here.
So, like, if I have to hearthis 53 times, let's just make
that take some time, okay, butlike you know, and everything
that you did before you know,years ago, may or may not be

(01:30:35):
relevant to who and what you aretoday, yeah.
The person you're presenting tome right now, the person you're
offering up to me right now, ismore interesting and, I think,
appealing than going back towhen you were 12.
And I don't know who thatperson was and I didn't get to
see them.
It doesn't make you any more orless romantic to me.
It just makes me feel like Imissed out on something that
I'll never get to be a part of.
Not that it's not nostalgic andyou couldn't share those

(01:30:57):
memories, because maybe therewere good memories and things.
But I just don't know that werealize that the sum of who you
are is a whole lot more thanjust those stories.
And, by the way, the sum of whoyou're going to become,
especially if you're sharingyour vulnerability with this new
person that's in your life, isgoing to be something completely
new and different, and that iswhere you're headed Like.
That's the journey and that'swhere you're going.

(01:31:18):
It's going to be incredible.
Speaking of incredible FearlessRoad, ladies and gentlemen, the
journey has begun.
Yet again, we have gone downthe Fearless Road with since he
often empowered and herincredible program at Lip Sync,
which brings a little bit ofalignment with love and romance
and our thoughts and our beingpresent in a world where it's

(01:31:41):
tough and a scarce world to findsomeone to share your life with
, someone to share your journeywith, especially on the Fearless
Road.

Well, the fear doesn't have to be up until now,
michael.

You meant up until now, up until now, up
until now, up until now, you canalways pull the car over and
let someone else in.
Up until now, you can alwaysask Fear to take a back seat so
someone can sit gunshot on therest of this journey there you
go, I keep that.
Sorry, fear.
It's been fine, but thisperson's really cute.

(01:32:12):
I want them in the front seatwith me.
You know what I'm saying?
You gotta make some space, soyou gotta ask everybody.
The committee that's in the headthey all gotta be like, get
back there for a minute so I canbe vulnerable and present
myself and offer someopportunity for love, romance,

(01:32:33):
which is part of the journey,folks.
Love and romance is part offear, it's part of vulnerability
, it's part of entrepreneurship.
There are so many angles and somany facets to being a
successful entrepreneur and aperson in this world, and love
and romance is a big part of it.
So thank you for sharing yourtime with us today.

Thank you.

Of course I mean .
This is something I've beendying to talk to you about and
trying to get us to this placeto share, so I'm glad that we
did.
I would love to look at ways tofollow up with some of these
things.
Maybe I need to get into theprogram.
Wow, we got a good community,come join us.
We do, we do, so it's gonna begood.
So, ladies and gentlemen,please thank our lovely guests

(01:33:14):
in the Austin.
If they wanna know more aboutyou and they wanna find out more
, where can they go?

Lip-sync-datingcom .

Michael Devo (01:33:21):
Lip-sync-datingcom .

Yep lip-sync-datingcom, and that's a
great way to get in touch withme there, and then it's also
linked to my private practice,which is austinempoweredcom.

Excellent.
Well, let's all be empoweredand for the rest of the day, if
you have enough of it left, loveyourself, be a little
compassionate you know, sit backfor a minute and recognize that
you're vibrant and you'reamazing and you share the space
with the world and the rest ofus and we love you for it.
So keep on going down thatfearless road.
Make sure you stop for pottybreaks.

(01:33:54):
Ha ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, haha.

Love you everybody .

Exactly love everybody.
Thank you so much.
Stay fearless, my friends, andbe well.
Hey everybody, if you likedwhat you heard today, would you
like and subscribe?
Would you follow?
Maybe share it with a fewpeople that you think would be
interested in listening to theFearless Road podcast.

(01:34:19):
We spend a lot of energy andtime trying to have really good
conversations about fear and theintersection of fear in our
lives, especially where theintersection of fear comes in
and impacts our business andimpacts our choices and
decisions, and I think this isan important conversation that
needs to be had, and I knowthese conversations sometimes
feel really long, but I thinkthere's a lot of value in them

(01:34:42):
and I really appreciate it Ifyou stuck all the way to the end
of this one.
Ha ha ha with Cindy Austin.
I mean, we talked about love,and love takes a long time
people.
This is a journey and this wasa good, long, deep and enjoyable
conversation and I think, gosh,there was some amazing,
wonderful little nuggets ofwisdom in here, so I hope you

(01:35:06):
enjoyed it.
I hope you're having awonderful holiday season.
Love yourselves, love everybody,be good to one another, like,
subscribe, follow, share, do allthose incredible things and
remember, like I said, we've gotthis incredible event.
It's on Facebook, the event islive and up there and we're
gonna be having it in February.
It's the Leadership Navigator2024 event, celebrating women in

(01:35:29):
entrepreneurship and all theamazing, incredible things that
are coming in 2024 for us, forthem, yeah.
So I'm really proud to beproducing it.
I hope you check it out.
All right, have a fantastic dayand, as I always say, stay
fearless.
Awardnos to AmericanConversants, dants and Members

(01:35:59):
of the AUDIENCE you

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