August 5, 2025 • 21 mins
Josh, a finance professional from Erie, Pennsylvania, shares how a timely billboard sparked a life-changing decision for him and his wife, Elena—to say yes to helping children in foster care. In this episode, you’ll hear how Josh brings foster care adoption advocacy into his Fortune 500 workplace, openly sharing his journey with colleagues and finding meaningful ways to support children in care. His story offers inspiration and practical ideas for anyone looking to be an advocate—right where they are.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:05):
We really should have waiting parents, not waiting children.
Over 100,000 children are available for adoption through
the US foster care system, and 27% don't have anyone like a
relative or foster parent in theprocess of adopting them. 60%
are between the ages of five and17, and 2/3 are part of sibling
groups of two to eight children.Hey listener, my name is Marcy
(00:27):
Bursack. My husband and I chose Adoption
is our Plan A. After blogging about our journey
adopting A sibling pair, I beganmentoring families right in my
own living room. That passion grew into the
Forgotten Adoption Option, a nonprofit and now lead as a
volunteer while working full time in the tech industry.
From my blog, Three Books app, and Classroom Lesson, to now a
45 minute course called Foster Care Adoption Simplified, which
(00:50):
you can find at forgottenadoptionoption.com,
I've created practical, heartfelt resources to help
families navigate the foster care adoption process.
As you listen to this episode, Iencourage you to ask yourself,
who in my circle needs to hear this?
It's often people in what we call helper professions.
People like therapists, nurses, doctors, police officers,
(01:11):
firefighters, social workers, and teachers like my husband.
These are the people who tend tostep forward to adopt children
from foster care. But this work isn't only about
becoming an adoptive family. It's also about becoming an
advocate and ally. Every waiting child deserves not
just a forever family, but a community of people who champion
their future. Whatever LED you to this
(01:33):
podcast, I am thrilled that you were here.
My mission is simple, to help every waiting child be with
their forever family. And that's exactly why I host
this podcast. Welcome to the Forgotten
Adoption Option podcast. In this episode we're going to
be discussing about being a champion of foster care adoption
(01:56):
in corporate America. Josh Casey and I met in early
2025 when I traveled to Erie, PAto be the keynote speaker at 2
fundraising events for Keystone Family Alliance.
One was at lunch and a few hourslater was at dinner and it was
the same event for two differentaudiences.
Hi, Josh. Hi, Marcy.
This is so great. Josh and I met at the dinner
event because it came after workand he was wearing a business
(02:18):
suit and I asked him about what led him to pick the dinner over
the lunch event. And that evening I met others
that Josh had invited and heard him share a few stories about
how he gets his own network involved in the foster care and
adoption space. So I was so intrigued by his
very intentional approach because he like filled the table
and was like passionate about all this that I asked if he
would come and inspire you and give you ideas for how you can
(02:40):
be a catalyst with your colleagues and professional
relationships. Josh is a very special person
and I'm excited for you all to hear a bit about his story and
ever growing family. So Josh, you and your wife, your
wife is there also at this evening event.
Can you talk about kind of how you and Elena got involved at
the get go about caring for children in the foster care
system? I would love to.
(03:01):
So first, Marcy, I really appreciate you having me.
It's such an honor and a privilege to be part of your
organization. Elaine and I, we discovered
several years back, you know, a couple years into our marriage
actually, that we can't have children biologically.
So, you know, we were still determined to start our own
family. We did look at several private
adoption agencies. And I remember distinctly after
(03:24):
interviewing with our third, we were driving home and kind of
talking about it. And you know, each each agency
had its own, it's something thatdidn't quite align with our
vision of the process. And as we're driving home that
night, we saw a billboard talking about foster care.
And so my wife, the next day shecalled, she called in to find
out more about it. And they had a training class
(03:47):
starting, I think it was that week.
So it would have been two days later.
And we just kind of took it as asign to get involved.
And so she signed us up. We started training that week.
It was AI believe it was a 13 week program.
You know, it's called path in Pennsylvania.
And we completed the training, got our clearances and just
immediately jumped in. Smokes.
OK, so do you remember anything about the Billboard?
(04:09):
Like what it said or was it likea picture of a kid?
Or something like that kid on the Billboard.
I remember that. OK, so emotionally, it like,
caught your eye and you're, like, in the middle of all this.
Yeah. And so would you say that she
saw the Billboard? Like, was it her idea?
I want to say she pointed out. I want to see if she pointed it
out. Yeah, because I remember when we
(04:29):
got home that night and we just started talking about fostering
instead. And, you know, we're, we're both
Googlers. So we just went down the rabbit
hole of Googling all this stuff for hours and talking about it.
And I, I honestly, I have no idea how we ended up pulling the
trigger so quickly because both of us tend to be very, very
thorough in anything we, you know, anything we engage in.
(04:49):
So, you know, call it fate, callit, you know, a calling.
But the fact that we jumped in so quickly, I, I think speaks
volumes to the impact that that billboard had on us, right.
Say so. Does that agency know?
Like, have you ever told them? No, I have not.
I'm like, that's an ad worth repeating.
Clearly. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
To think of it, yeah. That was brilliant.
(05:11):
OK, so you see the Billboard very rapidly respond.
And so present day, can you tellus the shape of your family?
How many kids do you have? What does that look like?
Yeah. So throughout throughout our
journey, we have I think fostered about 8 children with,
you know, several respite, shortterm, you know, short term
placements in between. We just finalized our third
(05:33):
adoption from the foster care system that happened March 28th.
We had a big celebration 4th in February.
It was so, so much fun. So we have two teenagers, both
14 and then we have our youngestis about 2 1/2 and we are very
much looking forward to expanding that family as time
goes on. So beautiful.
(05:55):
Save 3 kids all through adoptionand you say 214 year olds.
Are they siblings that well, they can't be siblings.
They're like, they're like the same age, right?
Are they from two different placements?
Then no, they are fraternal twins.
Oh, OK, OK, that does make more sense now because that's like
how? OK, that's fascinating.
And so. You.
You. From a adoption standpoint, you
did it in age order, then you did your older ones, and then
(06:16):
your younger one. Yeah, but there was no rhyme or
reason there. So when we were originally, you
know, when you set up for fostering, you can kind of
choose some parameters. So our original parameters were
5 and under and we very quickly violated that.
I think our either our second orthird placement.
We had two kids over that age. And then of course, we we talked
(06:39):
about the teenagers who were 13 turning 14 when we took them.
So yeah, we, I mean, we threw those right out the window.
A place to let our listeners know this too, because I'm
finishing up a research study across the country about like
what actually happens when you say I want a this or this shape
because I for my husband and me,we set up to two kids and I
think our age range was like age5 to 11 because my husband's
(07:01):
grandfather had been orphaned during that age group.
And when we learned about our kids that were in preschool and
we had a very similar to a very short window to respond, we had
to go get our license switched because we were like, we don't
have license for preschool kids.This is all new to us.
And so that's, yeah. So listen, there's if you're
thinking a certain shape or age bracket, maybe just realize that
(07:23):
that's good to put it on paper. It'd be flexible.
It's you absolutely. It's, it's definitely a part of
the process and it's not something you can avoid
necessarily. When you before you take
placements, I remember you have to put on the, on the papers all
of that information. And of course, if you're open to
anything, you just wouldn't fillit out right.
But there's no, there's no license restrictions, at least
(07:44):
not in Pennsylvania. So, you know, you can change,
you can change your parameters whenever you feel like it.
And to that point, I would encourage you to be open minded.
You know, whatever, whatever thoughts you have going into the
process and going into the, you know, the caring, I would just
keep an open mind as far as other, you know, other children
that might need a home encourageyou to hear their stories and
(08:05):
hear, you know how you how you might be able to help them as
well. Good encouragement.
Also empowering you listener, ifyou're like, I really don't feel
equipped over here, 'cause they're for us.
Like we one grounder my husband and I had was like, we didn't
feel equipped to help a teenagerthat was pregnant.
That was like a no for us, 'cause we're like, we don't know
how to do all that, so it's OK to say no.
It is. And I guess I want to, I want to
agree with that and reinforce that there has been some
(08:28):
heartbreaking areas where, you know, we've had to say no to
certain medical needs that we just weren't, like you said, we
weren't equipped to handle. And to your point, you know it,
it does feel terrible to do so, but we we kind of had to step
back and analyze if we would be doing more harm than good.
Yeah, that's, that's wise. Yeah, yeah, we had one of those
(08:50):
early and that my husband was like, no, we can't do that.
It's a temporary placement, not permanent because we were only
interested in adoption. And I felt so heartbroken to be
the one to say no. It felt like I was a bad human
being to say no. But someone else stepped in.
That was where they were supposed to be.
But yeah, sometimes the social service program doesn't look at
your parameters when they call. So just know that it can happen
and be ready to to say yes or noand that you think about it all
(09:12):
those are really healthy things.OK.
So Josh, I remember as we're laughing here, you might
remember that we were kind of half joking when we were talking
at the event about how you needed to renovate your home
because your wife and you wantedto help more children.
I'm curious how that dream is coming along.
Marcy it's fluid. So I did, I did renovate our
(09:33):
house last year. I went before we took our two
teenagers in. I I acknowledge that, you know,
teenagers are not going to want to share a room, especially not
a brother and sister. So I decided to evict myself
from my office. So I turned my attic into like a
loft type area and put my officeup there.
(09:53):
And now that we're again lookingto expand further, I need to
renovate further. So there is there's kind of a
split decision going on right now, Marcy.
I'm not sure if I'm going to addon to my existing house again or
if we're going to buy a new one.So at the moment we're kind of
getting our house ready to list and we're thinking of buying a
new house. But if that doesn't work out by
(10:15):
probably Midsummer, I'll probably look to just complete
renovations and prepare the house for more rooms.
That's amazing. It's amazing that you're like,
well, we'll just shake our livesup like this is where the is and
we want to keep helping. I think that's such a great
thing. And there are people that they,
they keep growing and growing. And then there's others like my
husband and I that he said she was Mac.
(10:36):
So I, I don't get to do that personally, Josh, I get to live
there. What you guys are doing, which
is incredible because it's like,you know, often times when your
family expands for any number ofreasons, you're like, OK, we
just have to figure it out and we either have people sharing
rooms or we're making space or we're just moving.
And so it's an exciting kind of crossroads for you all.
Like where will you end up and and who else will you be
(10:56):
helping? I.
Think it's important to be flexible, especially, especially
with kids. I mean, you, you really need to
make sure you're putting them first and and being flexible
with your own needs and be willing to sacrifice a couple
things if if you really want to get involved in help.
Huge. It's honest.
OK, so by day, you have a careerin a Fortune 500 company.
(11:20):
And as we prepared for this episode, you shared.
And this was like, what was so intriguing to me, like just
seeing your table and who was there.
And I was like, how did you get all your friends to come?
And you're like, well, I'm extremely vocal about my own
journey through foster care and adoption and to the point that
you said that your colleagues ask you for updates on a regular
basis. And to me that's like a huge
step of like, oh, that's not just the guy that does that, but
(11:41):
it's like, you know, like we're invested in his story.
So I'm really curious like how early into having children place
with you? Did you tell your Co workers and
how did that initially go? So you know they say opposite
tract, right? I, I am extremely extroverted
about everything and my wife is the polar opposite.
Now she admits she has made an incredibly close community
(12:05):
within a the foster care agencies, you know, officer
children or youth very, very close to, you know, all the
caseworkers and you met several of them at that event.
As far as outside the agency, I am far more vocal about it.
Our friends, people at work, andI don't know if everyone at work
just talks about to indulge me or if they truly care.
(12:25):
Hard to say, but every single office that I cover and that I'm
a part of, they all ask about what's going on.
They ask for pictures. They, they, they were very up to
date on, on the adoption processfor all three kids.
Every time I got a new placement, they asked about
them, wanted to know about, you know, their names, where they
went to school out there, you know, where they came from,
(12:46):
things like that. And then we had our adoption
celebration in February, I'm sorry, March.
I'd say I had about 30 or 40 colleagues show up.
I'm exaggerating. It wasn't quite that many,
probably more like 2025. A huge community of people that
care. That was exciting.
Have you found that some of themhave started taking steps in
(13:08):
their own lives to get licensed or be a respite provider or step
in? Several have, several have at
least taken. Well, yeah, several have taken
steps to. One family that I know very
closely is fully licensed and isgetting ready to accept
placements. It's contagious.
I think the data, I don't know if you know this, Josh, but I
(13:30):
had heard really early in our journey that for everyone family
that gets involved in the fostercare system that over the course
of their lifetime, seven kind ofconnections, like friends,
family, neighbors of theirs willget involved.
I actually started keeping a list because I was like, I'm
going to hit my 7. Like I, I'm, I'm competitive and
like, I want to make sure I'm like really using this
influence. And by the time I got to 15, I
(13:51):
was like, wait, you can go over the number.
And so that's kind of what's propelled me into this work is
like exactly what you're doing where it's like there's stuff
like people don't know. And when they get to kind of
peek in and see and hear of the need, they, they get involved
too. So I'm curious then, have you
ever, cuz there there's the little bit of Gray about like
what you know about the kids back story or their behaviors or
(14:13):
whatever's going on in their lives from kind of what brought
them into the child welfare system versus kind of just
typical kid stuff. Do you have boundaries that
you've had to set around, like what's OK to share or not share?
Yeah, we, we have and we're, we're very careful about that.
So we don't, we know, we don't share any details about the
family they came from. You know, I just, I don't feel
(14:34):
like that's appropriate, especially if, you know, because
that family could be reunited someday.
They could be, they could run into each other.
I mean, with the, the city I live in is not super big.
So, you know, whatever whatever happened with that family,
whether hardship, they're going through it, you know, it can be
resolved. That's the whole point of the
foster system, right? And so I'm sure they would be
mortified to hear, you know, they're the hardest, lowest
(14:56):
point in their life is being shared with strangers.
So no, we don't, we don't share what happened and what caused
the removal. If there was one.
We just talked about the kids, talk about the progress you're
making, you know, maybe, maybe some reservations they had when
they came to us. That's about it.
That's a wise gift because and Ifully support that because we,
(15:18):
we do something very similar. It's like if our kids ever want
to share their story, they can, but it's not ours to tell.
Like we, we can talk to you about being a parent and that's,
it sounds like what the angle isthat you all are doing that
you're just treating like kids and helping your, your network
just kind of see that they're kids and they're growing and,
and things are going on. And I'm curious as you share and
advocate and all the different kind of parts of your life for
(15:39):
children in the foster care system, what is your intention?
Because I'm your colleagues are so supportive of you and then
they get involved and come to events with you and they're
helping and celebrate. Do do you have intention or are
you more just like, I'm just sharing 'cause I love these kids
and whatever. Happens.
You know Marcy, I wish I could say I had some grand well
thought out end game there. I don't, I just don't, you know,
(16:03):
call it giddy optimism. I guess I'm so, I'm so
methodical in my work that I guess you know, all that, all
that spontaneity and all that energy gets to gets released
and, and my passion for fostering that.
I don't have a plan. I just talk about it with
whoever will hear about it. And if they want to get
involved, great, they can come hang out with me and I'll talk
more about it. I do want to see as many people
(16:26):
get involved as I possibly can, but I don't pressure anyone to
do so. I think it's more it's more
indirect in the way, you know, the way we talk about it and and
our experiences is less so than hey, you should, you should be a
foster parent. I think it's that indirect
contact that that's been relatively successful for us.
Anyways, they. Don't want to tell someone.
(16:47):
And we're just like just hearingkind of the story of what's
going on. So Josh, I think our listeners
are also wondering like, you didn't tell us what Josh does
for a living. So what?
What industry would you say you're in?
So I work in finance. I know that's incredibly broad,
but I guess more specifically wealth management.
This to give context for listeners that are like, how is
(17:07):
he doing all this? Like where where is he seeing
all these people? So her listeners, maybe Josh,
that are in the process, maybe they're near licensing or they
currently have children place with them or maybe they've gone
as far as adopting children foster care system.
And maybe they're kind of like, sure, how to talk about this to
the people who are around. And sometimes maybe I feel like
I overshare or maybe I question how I shared.
What kind of advice or encouragement would you give
(17:29):
them about kind of how to discern what's appropriate?
Good question, Very good question.
I would say think of it like this.
Think about if you had children,what you would want strangers to
know about your children. Take it that way.
So if if you if it's something that you wouldn't want anyone to
(17:50):
know about your son or daughter,then that's probably something
that you'd want to keep close tokeep close to your chest and,
and just keep between you and your family.
There's a bit of thinking in there, like it's not just dream
of consciousness, it's like really to be intentional with
like a filter. Well, and I would say a big part
of that comes to protection of the kids.
So the entire purpose and the core, you know, the core
(18:12):
component of why we foster is toprotect children, right?
And we're removing them from, you know, 1 dangerous situation
or another, whatever, you know, whatever 'cause that, that
removal to begin with. If if we're then, you know,
indirectly contributing that trauma by talking about it to
other people that they might encounter later on in life when
they might not have wanted that story shared.
(18:35):
I don't know that that's necessarily productive.
And I think like, you know, likeyou and I talked about if they
want to share their stories later on with, you know, their
friends or or other individuals,they're they're free to do so.
I don't know that it's our placeto do it for them.
Yeah, IA 100% agree. And that's really good advice
'cause there's you can only takeso much back, right?
Like once it's out there, it's it gets like, yeah, yeah, it
(18:58):
doesn't belong to. Us.
You're right. You're so right.
Yeah. So Josh, as we close, I want to
give you an opportunity to invite our listeners to join us
in using our voice to advocate for children in foster care.
Or maybe maybe we're just someone that cares about
children in the space. Maybe we're like a therapist and
these are our clients or we knowsomeone or we are someone.
(19:19):
I'm curious what one thing you would hope that we will do after
listening to your story. So whether you know, whether
you're just starting out and, and investigating fostering or
adopting, or, you know, you're kind of experienced, I would say
get more involved. Go to go to a couple local
(19:40):
events, you know, meet some agencies in your area, talk to
some of the talk to some of the caseworkers, meet some of the
children that, you know, happen to be at these events.
I think it's really important toremember that this is the most
vulnerable part of our society. And you know, we, we have, we
have a moral obligation to look after them.
So whatever you can do, whether even if it's not opening your
(20:02):
home, just getting involved and being vocal about you know, the
many options out there is is still going to help, right?
Oh good, Josh, this has been so fun.
I love that. Like Once Upon a wintry season
in Erie, PA. I think at the time that I came
in town, you all were like the snow globe capital of the world.
(20:24):
Like you got there was so much snow and there was like a
tundra. Like I had to fly into Ohio
because I couldn't get over there.
Like it's, it's amazing to me the people you get to meet along
this journey that are doing veryto me, it's just amazing to hear
the heart of where you and your wife got started and then where
you've come and how you're continuing to go.
(20:45):
So thanks for taking time out tolet us know where you are right
now and to hear some of the backstory.
I really appreciate you giving me the opportunity to share.
Thank you so much for spending time with us.
It truly matters that you listentoday, because by tuning in,
you're opening your heart to thestories of children in foster
(21:06):
care, sparking empathy and starting to see how your unique
role, whether as a friend, advocate, or even as a future
adoptive parent, can bring hope and belonging to a child or
sibling group that is waiting. I also.
Want to personally invite you toreach out to me to ask anything
that's on your heart. I promise no judgement.
You can find me on Facebook, LinkedIn and Instagram and I
(21:27):
mean it when I say you can ask anything.
I know it can feel awkward to ask questions publicly and
that's why I carve out time during my lunch hour and
evenings while my kids and husband are at martial arts to
mentor others one-on-one. Your questions matter, your
curiosity matters, and most importantly, the role you are
playing in helping children in foster care matters.
Together we can bring hope and belonging.
(21:49):
Until next time, take care and keep the conversation going.
We really should have waiting parents, not waiting children.
Over 100,000 children are available for adoption through
the US foster care system, and 27% don't have anyone like a
relative or foster parent in theprocess of adopting them. 60%
are between the ages of five and17, and 2/3 are part of sibling
groups of two to eight children.Hey listener, my name is Marcy
(00:27):
Bursack. My husband and I chose Adoption
is our Plan A. After blogging about our journey
adopting A sibling pair, I beganmentoring families right in my
own living room. That passion grew into the
Forgotten Adoption Option, a nonprofit and now lead as a
volunteer while working full time in the tech industry.
From my blog, Three Books app, and Classroom Lesson, to now a
45 minute course called Foster Care Adoption Simplified, which
(00:50):
you can find at forgottenadoptionoption.com,
I've created practical, heartfelt resources to help
families navigate the foster care adoption process.
As you listen to this episode, Iencourage you to ask yourself,
who in my circle needs to hear this?
It's often people in what we call helper professions.
People like therapists, nurses, doctors, police officers,
(01:11):
firefighters, social workers, and teachers like my husband.
These are the people who tend tostep forward to adopt children
from foster care. But this work isn't only about
becoming an adoptive family. It's also about becoming an
advocate and ally. Every waiting child deserves not
just a forever family, but a community of people who champion
their future. Whatever LED you to this
(01:33):
podcast, I am thrilled that you were here.
My mission is simple, to help every waiting child be with
their forever family. And that's exactly why I host
this podcast. Welcome to the Forgotten
Adoption Option podcast. In this episode we're going to
be discussing about being a champion of foster care adoption
(01:56):
in corporate America. Josh Casey and I met in early
2025 when I traveled to Erie, PAto be the keynote speaker at 2
fundraising events for Keystone Family Alliance.
One was at lunch and a few hourslater was at dinner and it was
the same event for two differentaudiences.
Hi, Josh. Hi, Marcy.
This is so great. Josh and I met at the dinner
event because it came after workand he was wearing a business
(02:18):
suit and I asked him about what led him to pick the dinner over
the lunch event. And that evening I met others
that Josh had invited and heard him share a few stories about
how he gets his own network involved in the foster care and
adoption space. So I was so intrigued by his
very intentional approach because he like filled the table
and was like passionate about all this that I asked if he
would come and inspire you and give you ideas for how you can
(02:40):
be a catalyst with your colleagues and professional
relationships. Josh is a very special person
and I'm excited for you all to hear a bit about his story and
ever growing family. So Josh, you and your wife, your
wife is there also at this evening event.
Can you talk about kind of how you and Elena got involved at
the get go about caring for children in the foster care
system? I would love to.
(03:01):
So first, Marcy, I really appreciate you having me.
It's such an honor and a privilege to be part of your
organization. Elaine and I, we discovered
several years back, you know, a couple years into our marriage
actually, that we can't have children biologically.
So, you know, we were still determined to start our own
family. We did look at several private
adoption agencies. And I remember distinctly after
(03:24):
interviewing with our third, we were driving home and kind of
talking about it. And you know, each each agency
had its own, it's something thatdidn't quite align with our
vision of the process. And as we're driving home that
night, we saw a billboard talking about foster care.
And so my wife, the next day shecalled, she called in to find
out more about it. And they had a training class
(03:47):
starting, I think it was that week.
So it would have been two days later.
And we just kind of took it as asign to get involved.
And so she signed us up. We started training that week.
It was AI believe it was a 13 week program.
You know, it's called path in Pennsylvania.
And we completed the training, got our clearances and just
immediately jumped in. Smokes.
OK, so do you remember anything about the Billboard?
(04:09):
Like what it said or was it likea picture of a kid?
Or something like that kid on the Billboard.
I remember that. OK, so emotionally, it like,
caught your eye and you're, like, in the middle of all this.
Yeah. And so would you say that she
saw the Billboard? Like, was it her idea?
I want to say she pointed out. I want to see if she pointed it
out. Yeah, because I remember when we
(04:29):
got home that night and we just started talking about fostering
instead. And, you know, we're, we're both
Googlers. So we just went down the rabbit
hole of Googling all this stuff for hours and talking about it.
And I, I honestly, I have no idea how we ended up pulling the
trigger so quickly because both of us tend to be very, very
thorough in anything we, you know, anything we engage in.
(04:49):
So, you know, call it fate, callit, you know, a calling.
But the fact that we jumped in so quickly, I, I think speaks
volumes to the impact that that billboard had on us, right.
Say so. Does that agency know?
Like, have you ever told them? No, I have not.
I'm like, that's an ad worth repeating.
Clearly. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
To think of it, yeah. That was brilliant.
(05:11):
OK, so you see the Billboard very rapidly respond.
And so present day, can you tellus the shape of your family?
How many kids do you have? What does that look like?
Yeah. So throughout throughout our
journey, we have I think fostered about 8 children with,
you know, several respite, shortterm, you know, short term
placements in between. We just finalized our third
(05:33):
adoption from the foster care system that happened March 28th.
We had a big celebration 4th in February.
It was so, so much fun. So we have two teenagers, both
14 and then we have our youngestis about 2 1/2 and we are very
much looking forward to expanding that family as time
goes on. So beautiful.
(05:55):
Save 3 kids all through adoptionand you say 214 year olds.
Are they siblings that well, they can't be siblings.
They're like, they're like the same age, right?
Are they from two different placements?
Then no, they are fraternal twins.
Oh, OK, OK, that does make more sense now because that's like
how? OK, that's fascinating.
And so. You.
You. From a adoption standpoint, you
did it in age order, then you did your older ones, and then
(06:16):
your younger one. Yeah, but there was no rhyme or
reason there. So when we were originally, you
know, when you set up for fostering, you can kind of
choose some parameters. So our original parameters were
5 and under and we very quickly violated that.
I think our either our second orthird placement.
We had two kids over that age. And then of course, we we talked
(06:39):
about the teenagers who were 13 turning 14 when we took them.
So yeah, we, I mean, we threw those right out the window.
A place to let our listeners know this too, because I'm
finishing up a research study across the country about like
what actually happens when you say I want a this or this shape
because I for my husband and me,we set up to two kids and I
think our age range was like age5 to 11 because my husband's
(07:01):
grandfather had been orphaned during that age group.
And when we learned about our kids that were in preschool and
we had a very similar to a very short window to respond, we had
to go get our license switched because we were like, we don't
have license for preschool kids.This is all new to us.
And so that's, yeah. So listen, there's if you're
thinking a certain shape or age bracket, maybe just realize that
(07:23):
that's good to put it on paper. It'd be flexible.
It's you absolutely. It's, it's definitely a part of
the process and it's not something you can avoid
necessarily. When you before you take
placements, I remember you have to put on the, on the papers all
of that information. And of course, if you're open to
anything, you just wouldn't fillit out right.
But there's no, there's no license restrictions, at least
(07:44):
not in Pennsylvania. So, you know, you can change,
you can change your parameters whenever you feel like it.
And to that point, I would encourage you to be open minded.
You know, whatever, whatever thoughts you have going into the
process and going into the, you know, the caring, I would just
keep an open mind as far as other, you know, other children
that might need a home encourageyou to hear their stories and
(08:05):
hear, you know how you how you might be able to help them as
well. Good encouragement.
Also empowering you listener, ifyou're like, I really don't feel
equipped over here, 'cause they're for us.
Like we one grounder my husband and I had was like, we didn't
feel equipped to help a teenagerthat was pregnant.
That was like a no for us, 'cause we're like, we don't know
how to do all that, so it's OK to say no.
It is. And I guess I want to, I want to
agree with that and reinforce that there has been some
(08:28):
heartbreaking areas where, you know, we've had to say no to
certain medical needs that we just weren't, like you said, we
weren't equipped to handle. And to your point, you know it,
it does feel terrible to do so, but we we kind of had to step
back and analyze if we would be doing more harm than good.
Yeah, that's, that's wise. Yeah, yeah, we had one of those
(08:50):
early and that my husband was like, no, we can't do that.
It's a temporary placement, not permanent because we were only
interested in adoption. And I felt so heartbroken to be
the one to say no. It felt like I was a bad human
being to say no. But someone else stepped in.
That was where they were supposed to be.
But yeah, sometimes the social service program doesn't look at
your parameters when they call. So just know that it can happen
and be ready to to say yes or noand that you think about it all
(09:12):
those are really healthy things.OK.
So Josh, I remember as we're laughing here, you might
remember that we were kind of half joking when we were talking
at the event about how you needed to renovate your home
because your wife and you wantedto help more children.
I'm curious how that dream is coming along.
Marcy it's fluid. So I did, I did renovate our
(09:33):
house last year. I went before we took our two
teenagers in. I I acknowledge that, you know,
teenagers are not going to want to share a room, especially not
a brother and sister. So I decided to evict myself
from my office. So I turned my attic into like a
loft type area and put my officeup there.
(09:53):
And now that we're again lookingto expand further, I need to
renovate further. So there is there's kind of a
split decision going on right now, Marcy.
I'm not sure if I'm going to addon to my existing house again or
if we're going to buy a new one.So at the moment we're kind of
getting our house ready to list and we're thinking of buying a
new house. But if that doesn't work out by
(10:15):
probably Midsummer, I'll probably look to just complete
renovations and prepare the house for more rooms.
That's amazing. It's amazing that you're like,
well, we'll just shake our livesup like this is where the is and
we want to keep helping. I think that's such a great
thing. And there are people that they,
they keep growing and growing. And then there's others like my
husband and I that he said she was Mac.
(10:36):
So I, I don't get to do that personally, Josh, I get to live
there. What you guys are doing, which
is incredible because it's like,you know, often times when your
family expands for any number ofreasons, you're like, OK, we
just have to figure it out and we either have people sharing
rooms or we're making space or we're just moving.
And so it's an exciting kind of crossroads for you all.
Like where will you end up and and who else will you be
(10:56):
helping? I.
Think it's important to be flexible, especially, especially
with kids. I mean, you, you really need to
make sure you're putting them first and and being flexible
with your own needs and be willing to sacrifice a couple
things if if you really want to get involved in help.
Huge. It's honest.
OK, so by day, you have a careerin a Fortune 500 company.
(11:20):
And as we prepared for this episode, you shared.
And this was like, what was so intriguing to me, like just
seeing your table and who was there.
And I was like, how did you get all your friends to come?
And you're like, well, I'm extremely vocal about my own
journey through foster care and adoption and to the point that
you said that your colleagues ask you for updates on a regular
basis. And to me that's like a huge
step of like, oh, that's not just the guy that does that, but
(11:41):
it's like, you know, like we're invested in his story.
So I'm really curious like how early into having children place
with you? Did you tell your Co workers and
how did that initially go? So you know they say opposite
tract, right? I, I am extremely extroverted
about everything and my wife is the polar opposite.
Now she admits she has made an incredibly close community
(12:05):
within a the foster care agencies, you know, officer
children or youth very, very close to, you know, all the
caseworkers and you met several of them at that event.
As far as outside the agency, I am far more vocal about it.
Our friends, people at work, andI don't know if everyone at work
just talks about to indulge me or if they truly care.
(12:25):
Hard to say, but every single office that I cover and that I'm
a part of, they all ask about what's going on.
They ask for pictures. They, they, they were very up to
date on, on the adoption processfor all three kids.
Every time I got a new placement, they asked about
them, wanted to know about, you know, their names, where they
went to school out there, you know, where they came from,
(12:46):
things like that. And then we had our adoption
celebration in February, I'm sorry, March.
I'd say I had about 30 or 40 colleagues show up.
I'm exaggerating. It wasn't quite that many,
probably more like 2025. A huge community of people that
care. That was exciting.
Have you found that some of themhave started taking steps in
(13:08):
their own lives to get licensed or be a respite provider or step
in? Several have, several have at
least taken. Well, yeah, several have taken
steps to. One family that I know very
closely is fully licensed and isgetting ready to accept
placements. It's contagious.
I think the data, I don't know if you know this, Josh, but I
(13:30):
had heard really early in our journey that for everyone family
that gets involved in the fostercare system that over the course
of their lifetime, seven kind ofconnections, like friends,
family, neighbors of theirs willget involved.
I actually started keeping a list because I was like, I'm
going to hit my 7. Like I, I'm, I'm competitive and
like, I want to make sure I'm like really using this
influence. And by the time I got to 15, I
(13:51):
was like, wait, you can go over the number.
And so that's kind of what's propelled me into this work is
like exactly what you're doing where it's like there's stuff
like people don't know. And when they get to kind of
peek in and see and hear of the need, they, they get involved
too. So I'm curious then, have you
ever, cuz there there's the little bit of Gray about like
what you know about the kids back story or their behaviors or
(14:13):
whatever's going on in their lives from kind of what brought
them into the child welfare system versus kind of just
typical kid stuff. Do you have boundaries that
you've had to set around, like what's OK to share or not share?
Yeah, we, we have and we're, we're very careful about that.
So we don't, we know, we don't share any details about the
family they came from. You know, I just, I don't feel
(14:34):
like that's appropriate, especially if, you know, because
that family could be reunited someday.
They could be, they could run into each other.
I mean, with the, the city I live in is not super big.
So, you know, whatever whatever happened with that family,
whether hardship, they're going through it, you know, it can be
resolved. That's the whole point of the
foster system, right? And so I'm sure they would be
mortified to hear, you know, they're the hardest, lowest
(14:56):
point in their life is being shared with strangers.
So no, we don't, we don't share what happened and what caused
the removal. If there was one.
We just talked about the kids, talk about the progress you're
making, you know, maybe, maybe some reservations they had when
they came to us. That's about it.
That's a wise gift because and Ifully support that because we,
(15:18):
we do something very similar. It's like if our kids ever want
to share their story, they can, but it's not ours to tell.
Like we, we can talk to you about being a parent and that's,
it sounds like what the angle isthat you all are doing that
you're just treating like kids and helping your, your network
just kind of see that they're kids and they're growing and,
and things are going on. And I'm curious as you share and
advocate and all the different kind of parts of your life for
(15:39):
children in the foster care system, what is your intention?
Because I'm your colleagues are so supportive of you and then
they get involved and come to events with you and they're
helping and celebrate. Do do you have intention or are
you more just like, I'm just sharing 'cause I love these kids
and whatever. Happens.
You know Marcy, I wish I could say I had some grand well
thought out end game there. I don't, I just don't, you know,
(16:03):
call it giddy optimism. I guess I'm so, I'm so
methodical in my work that I guess you know, all that, all
that spontaneity and all that energy gets to gets released
and, and my passion for fostering that.
I don't have a plan. I just talk about it with
whoever will hear about it. And if they want to get
involved, great, they can come hang out with me and I'll talk
more about it. I do want to see as many people
(16:26):
get involved as I possibly can, but I don't pressure anyone to
do so. I think it's more it's more
indirect in the way, you know, the way we talk about it and and
our experiences is less so than hey, you should, you should be a
foster parent. I think it's that indirect
contact that that's been relatively successful for us.
Anyways, they. Don't want to tell someone.
(16:47):
And we're just like just hearingkind of the story of what's
going on. So Josh, I think our listeners
are also wondering like, you didn't tell us what Josh does
for a living. So what?
What industry would you say you're in?
So I work in finance. I know that's incredibly broad,
but I guess more specifically wealth management.
This to give context for listeners that are like, how is
(17:07):
he doing all this? Like where where is he seeing
all these people? So her listeners, maybe Josh,
that are in the process, maybe they're near licensing or they
currently have children place with them or maybe they've gone
as far as adopting children foster care system.
And maybe they're kind of like, sure, how to talk about this to
the people who are around. And sometimes maybe I feel like
I overshare or maybe I question how I shared.
What kind of advice or encouragement would you give
(17:29):
them about kind of how to discern what's appropriate?
Good question, Very good question.
I would say think of it like this.
Think about if you had children,what you would want strangers to
know about your children. Take it that way.
So if if you if it's something that you wouldn't want anyone to
(17:50):
know about your son or daughter,then that's probably something
that you'd want to keep close tokeep close to your chest and,
and just keep between you and your family.
There's a bit of thinking in there, like it's not just dream
of consciousness, it's like really to be intentional with
like a filter. Well, and I would say a big part
of that comes to protection of the kids.
So the entire purpose and the core, you know, the core
(18:12):
component of why we foster is toprotect children, right?
And we're removing them from, you know, 1 dangerous situation
or another, whatever, you know, whatever 'cause that, that
removal to begin with. If if we're then, you know,
indirectly contributing that trauma by talking about it to
other people that they might encounter later on in life when
they might not have wanted that story shared.
(18:35):
I don't know that that's necessarily productive.
And I think like, you know, likeyou and I talked about if they
want to share their stories later on with, you know, their
friends or or other individuals,they're they're free to do so.
I don't know that it's our placeto do it for them.
Yeah, IA 100% agree. And that's really good advice
'cause there's you can only takeso much back, right?
Like once it's out there, it's it gets like, yeah, yeah, it
(18:58):
doesn't belong to. Us.
You're right. You're so right.
Yeah. So Josh, as we close, I want to
give you an opportunity to invite our listeners to join us
in using our voice to advocate for children in foster care.
Or maybe maybe we're just someone that cares about
children in the space. Maybe we're like a therapist and
these are our clients or we knowsomeone or we are someone.
(19:19):
I'm curious what one thing you would hope that we will do after
listening to your story. So whether you know, whether
you're just starting out and, and investigating fostering or
adopting, or, you know, you're kind of experienced, I would say
get more involved. Go to go to a couple local
(19:40):
events, you know, meet some agencies in your area, talk to
some of the talk to some of the caseworkers, meet some of the
children that, you know, happen to be at these events.
I think it's really important toremember that this is the most
vulnerable part of our society. And you know, we, we have, we
have a moral obligation to look after them.
So whatever you can do, whether even if it's not opening your
(20:02):
home, just getting involved and being vocal about you know, the
many options out there is is still going to help, right?
Oh good, Josh, this has been so fun.
I love that. Like Once Upon a wintry season
in Erie, PA. I think at the time that I came
in town, you all were like the snow globe capital of the world.
(20:24):
Like you got there was so much snow and there was like a
tundra. Like I had to fly into Ohio
because I couldn't get over there.
Like it's, it's amazing to me the people you get to meet along
this journey that are doing veryto me, it's just amazing to hear
the heart of where you and your wife got started and then where
you've come and how you're continuing to go.
(20:45):
So thanks for taking time out tolet us know where you are right
now and to hear some of the backstory.
I really appreciate you giving me the opportunity to share.
Thank you so much for spending time with us.
It truly matters that you listentoday, because by tuning in,
you're opening your heart to thestories of children in foster
(21:06):
care, sparking empathy and starting to see how your unique
role, whether as a friend, advocate, or even as a future
adoptive parent, can bring hope and belonging to a child or
sibling group that is waiting. I also.
Want to personally invite you toreach out to me to ask anything
that's on your heart. I promise no judgement.
You can find me on Facebook, LinkedIn and Instagram and I
(21:27):
mean it when I say you can ask anything.
I know it can feel awkward to ask questions publicly and
that's why I carve out time during my lunch hour and
evenings while my kids and husband are at martial arts to
mentor others one-on-one. Your questions matter, your
curiosity matters, and most importantly, the role you are
playing in helping children in foster care matters.
Together we can bring hope and belonging.
(21:49):
Until next time, take care and keep the conversation going.
Host
Marcy Bursac
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