Mother Baby Bonding, Mother Fetus Bonding

                                                      The Bonding Edition

 

What is a mother? Some definitions include:

• The female parent
• To mother is to bring up a child with care and affection
• “a mother understands what a child does not say”
• “Motherhood has the greatest potential influence in human life”
• “a beetle is a beauty in the eyes of his mother” J

What is bonding?

• Must be attached first to bring up a child with care and affection.
• Bonding is the formation of a close human relationship
• Emotional and physical attachment between mother and offspring

There are two important bonding types to consider:

• The first is maternal-fetal bonding or when a women is pregnant with the developing baby
• The second is mother-baby bonding or bonding with baby after delivery

 

Maternal fetal bonding spans three semesters:

• The first trimester includes adjusting to the idea of pregnancy
• Most report ambivalence
• May experience nausea, vomiting, fatigue and this may amplify anxiety
• During the Second trimester the baby’s movement is felt
• You may start thinking about who this person could be
• You start thinking about the baby as separate from self
• The Third trimester includes getting ready for baby’s arrival
• Prepping for labor or surgery
• Most experience fatigue

Mother-Baby Bonding
-acceptance of baby as a whole and no longer just an idea
-may be some attachment concerns with difficult deliveries (PTSD)
-or if delivery did not go as planned, like planned water birth and ended up with forceps delivery - or epidural during labor or c/s etc
- or if baby ended up in NICU
-or if preterm delivery

Mother-Baby Bonding

- perinatal time is one of identity shift
- from own entity or person to mother of 1
- Identity is fluid, could be shift from mother of 1 to now mother of 2
- Bonding impacted by historical family relationships (mother was idolized or not?)

Why do we care about bonding?

- early attachment relationships between mom and baby improve baby’s psychological, cognitive, and social development
- attachment styles impact how the baby interacts with humanity in the future
- A mother who is bonded with her baby will try to know, protect, interact with, and meet the needs of her baby

What impacts bonding?

Social Support:

• Protective against stress & challenges
• Help with planning for baby’s future
• Allows for better adjustment to motherhood
• Could be partner, family of origin, close friends

Self Esteem:

• Optimistic beliefs improve bonding
• Happy with appearance or self image improves bonding
• High sense of wellbeing
• Prepared for baby

Mental Health:

Depression decreases bonding (inverse relationship)

Some studies anxiety decreased bonding

Hollywood Bonding Versus Bonding in Reality

• I had Hollywood bonding with my second
• Maybe wisdom from having first
• Knew what to expect
• Knew that systems could be built to organize care

Reality:

• With my first baby I was isolated
• It felt harder to bond
• It was comforting to know that Good to know bonding i