November 3, 2025 • 29 mins
Ever said yes on set when you really wanted to say no?
In this episode, you’re coming with me inside a real set horror story — the kind that forces you to rethink what it means to be “easy to work with.”
You’ll hear what happened when I tried to be the chill, go-with-the-flow actor… and how it backfired in a way I never expected. More importantly, you’ll walk away with the mindset shift and boundary tools that help you protect your craft, your safety, and your confidence on set — so you can book the right roles, not just any roles.
If you’ve ever struggled to speak up, wanted to be liked more than you wanted to be respected, or felt nervous to draw a line in a professional space, this episode is for you.
Because actors who book aren’t just talented — they know when (and how) to say no. And if you’re ready to strengthen that muscle, I’m also giving you a fun resource to help: Boundary Bingo — your daily challenge to practice one small boundary at a time and build your confidence brick by brick.
Grab your coffee (or matcha) and let's dive in. 🎬✨
2025 could be the year everything shifts for you—and I want to be right there with you on the journey.
Follow along for the real behind-the-scenes of acting, modeling, and mindset growth—you’ll see the wins, the lessons, and what it really takes to build a creative career.
📸 Instagram: @megsalisburycreative
🎬 TikTok: @megsalisburycreative
🌐 Blog + FREE Resources
Mindset Coaching for Actors: Subconscious reprogramming + nevous system regulation is fastest, easiest way to book more meaningful acting work. If you’re tired of holding youself back and want support to show up with confidence, clarity, and ease—I’d love to work with you. Apply for 1:1 coaching here
The Glow Up Newsletter: Want the best tips and takeaways to help you book more work and thrive in your career? Sign up here and start glowing up month by month.
You don’t have to figure this out alone. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this with another dreamer—because your next big break might be closer than you think.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
I could not believe that they were asking me to
fight blind.
Like, in what world do you thinkit's a good idea in your student
film for me to fight somebodywhen I can't see?
What I'm telling you right nowis I cannot see.
And I had to really fight andstick to that boundary that day.
You always have the right.
(00:21):
I think we forget a lot of timesthat we conform to script, we
conform to job, that we have theright and the opportunity to say
no to any moment and any time atany job in any scenario.
(00:53):
I'm Meg, actress, model, andmindset coach for actors.
Think of me as yourbehind-the-scenes bestie for
chasing dreams, surviving plottwists, and building something
big.
Here we talk about it all.
Auditions, photo shoots, mindsetchips, script prep, and the
(01:14):
career curveballs that nobodyprepares you for.
I'll share the highs and thehard lessons in real time
because growing in this industryisn't always pretty, but it's
always worth it.
If you're ready to ditchself-sabotage, step into your
confidence and build the careerand mindset you've been dreaming
of.
Grab your favorite drink, getcozy, and let's dive in.
(01:39):
Hey y'all! Welcome back toanother episode of the Glow Up
Year.
Yeah.
Okay, today is a Halloweenthemed episode, and I'm so
excited.
We're uh yeah.
Oh, I have so much to tell you.
Okay, we're gonna stick to theHalloween-theme, even though the
(02:00):
episode is gonna um drop acouple days after Halloween.
But I have been looking forwardto this episode.
I can't tell you how long I havehad this plan for this episode
for months now, and I've been soexcited for this episode.
So here it goes.
Today we are talking abouthorror stories on set.
(02:21):
Ooh, I'm gonna bring you throughone of my set experiences that
was crazy.
We're gonna talk about my horrorstory on set, and then we're
gonna bring it back to y'all,and we're gonna talk about some
mindset.
Before we get started, you'regonna start to notice some
(02:42):
changes with the podcast, andI'm not gonna get too deep into
it because we're gonna talkabout it next episode quite
thoroughly.
This episode, I just want you tostart to notice you're gonna see
some changes.
The outro, the intro is gonnachange a little bit.
So stay tuned.
We're gonna do some really coolshifts in you guys' favor.
So I'm very excited to sharethose with you, and they're
(03:03):
coming up soon.
One of the biggest shifts,though, that I the reason I had
to talk about this today isbecause, well, not because we
are starting a video podcast.
This is all on video now, y'all.
So we can sit here and sip ourlittle cuppies of tea together
or coffee or whatever and talkabout all the amazing things.
(03:26):
So if you're with us joining ustoday via video, then you'll see
that my beautiful mug today is alittle hedgehog.
She's so cute.
So I'll be sipping out of myhedgehog the whole episode.
I encourage you to have a coolass mug to sip with me.
And if you are listeningauditorily, you can just imagine
my cute ass hedgehog mug.
(03:47):
It's in it actually looks like ahedgehog, like it's a little
shape of a hedgehog.
It's very cute.
So you know what?
Let's just take a let's take asip together.
But back to set horror stories.
Ooh.
So this is my worst set horrorexperience.
(04:11):
I can't okay.
We'll just start at thebeginning.
Okay, so this was a studentfilm.
I was aware it was a studentfilm, okay, and this was back in
the early days, but I got ascript for this like alien short
film, and I had to drive down tolike New Hampshire, Vermont.
I can't remember.
Um, but it was like a six-hourdrive.
(04:33):
It was a long drive to do thisunpaid student film.
They had sold to me that so uhspoil alert, I'm the alien.
So they had sold to me that thealien makeup was gonna be really
cool and veiny and very awesome.
These cool opaque contacts, somy entire eye would be white.
(04:55):
I was so excited for this likecrazy makeup transformation.
It's gonna be really fun.
And I'm not gonna go too deepinto the story because there are
a lot of like weird things, butlike leading up to this, but I'm
just gonna give you the like themain crux of the story.
So I've driven a long way to getto this place.
We're gonna stay overnight inthe house we're filming in,
(05:16):
which is kind of convenient andgreat.
I pick up the hair style or hairand makeup stylist.
She lives in um Maine as well.
And last minute her ride fellthrough, so I picked her up and
we drove the entire way downthis like six hours.
It was crazy.
It was kind of an awkward carride because she wasn't very
talkative and I didn't reallyknow what to do.
(05:36):
So, but whatever.
I was like nice to like have anopportunity to bond with your
hair and makeup artist beforethe like did the day of crazy
makeup.
And I'd looked at all of hersocial media and she had some
really cool things up there, andso we go, we're filming, right?
And it's like I think it's asecond day, and today is the
this the day that we're gonna dothe crazy like makeup.
(05:59):
My call time's first.
I'm early in the morning becauseI have like four hours of makeup
to happen.
And it turns out that the makeupartist was fighting with the
director, and so I wake up thatnext morning, I come to sit in
the chair, I've heard the theideas, he wants to do like
crazy, like veiny things goingacross my face, and the makeup
(06:22):
artist is angry with him, and soshe tells me, I'm just gonna do
what I want.
And of course, this is like anawkward position for me because
I'm like, do I uh like I can'tpiss her off more because she
has the power to make me looklike crap.
So I guess I have to like kindof side with her, or not
necessarily side with her, butI've got to like stay engaged
(06:45):
with this girl because she'sgonna be doing my makeup and I'm
gonna look crazy if I don't stayengaged with her.
So I'm like listening to herevent and all of the things.
Before I know it, she's decidedshe's gonna change the entire
look from what was agreed onbefore, which was crazy veins
all over my face, to this isgonna sound so rude.
(07:08):
But I ended up looking like aburnt marshmallow.
Like burnt marshmallow.
She just kept gluing cottonballs to my face and then like
painting them and gluing themand painting them.
(07:31):
This is I'm gonna drop a pictureif you're listening to the video
podcast.
This is what I look like, but Ididn't know what to do, and I
sat there for four hours, likegetting worse and worse and
worse looking.
And at first it looked like kindof okay, but as the day went on,
like more of my skin startedlike peeking through in
different areas, and so I justlook like burnt marshmallow,
(07:53):
like it just looked like badmakeup.
Let me let me just reel.
Without like without being hate,I'm not saying her name.
I I'm not saying that this onelook defined her entire career
because it does not, and ifyou're listening, it did not,
but I looked wild, like wildbad.
We go to film, and this is thisis where the story gets crazy.
(08:17):
So the night before we hadscheduled like some practice
because there's this whole alienfight scene, right?
And so we are fighting, we'vescheduled the practice.
I like jump on somebody on thebed and like straddle them and
punch them, and then I roll offthe bed, and I go over to the
other guy and I grab him by thelike the neck against the wall.
It's like crazy wild stuff.
(08:39):
And I had recorded it because Iwanted to kind of like continue
to practice it in my mind and doall like of course we practice
it physically for safetypurposes, and all of this part
of this was safe.
Everything was safe.
Let me say that because you'rehearing horror stories right
now.
So everything's safe,everything's planned.
We go to film and we decidewe're gonna put the um contacts
(09:00):
in, and I've never put contactsin before, y'all.
So I was not prepared for this.
Not prepared.
And so she puts the I couldn'tdo it myself because they're
full, like they're not just overthe iris, they're like full eye
contacts.
And so she's putting them in.
We're struggling.
It took like 20 minutes to getthem in my eyes because my eyes
are just so sensitive.
She finally gets them in and I'mblind.
(09:25):
Like they're not opaque orsee-through or whatever that
word is.
I cannot see anything.
Not being able to see anythingwouldn't be so bad if I didn't
have a fight scene issue.
And I kid you not.
The guys, the director and thelike camera op, they come up to
(09:50):
me and they say, You can stillfight though, right?
I'm just gonna leave a moment ofsilence here.
You can still fight though,right?
No, I can't fucking see.
I would fucking hurt people or Ihurt myself.
I was like, absolutely not, Icannot fight.
(10:13):
Like, in what world do you thinkit's a good idea in your student
film for me to fight somebodywhen I can't see?
What I'm telling you right nowis I cannot see.
And I had to really fight andstick to that boundary that day
because I was like, safety isvery important to me, especially
on set, especially as talent,but and crew as well.
(10:36):
But I could not believe thatthey were asking me to fight
blind for a student film.
And I had to stick so hard tothat boundary because they kept
trying to convince me.
And finally, I said, This is mysolution to this, guys.
You can shoot the coverage youwant with my eyes like this
right now, because this took 20minutes to get my eye.
(10:57):
You can shoot whatever coverageyou want face forward of me like
this, any like still moments.
We can like I can straddle thisdude on the bed, and I can look
up at camera, whatever you want.
Not that I know where camera is,but whatever you want.
I just cannot actually do thefight.
You so you can shoot all of thefront of my face where you want
(11:18):
to see the contacts, and then Ican take these bad boys out, and
we can shoot all the other shit.
Like where I'm running at themfrom behind, all of that stuff.
But you cannot right now ask meto shoot like this.
No way.
Absolutely not.
No.
Later on that day, I was sittingthere getting my makeup taken
(11:42):
off, and mind you, I'm notgetting paid for this.
This was an unpaid opportunitythat I drove very far for to get
something for my reel, and endedup being not real worthy at all
at the end of the day.
The director-producer guy,again, we're talking about
children and short films and allof these things, so I'm not
saying what they did is right orappropriate or correct, is
(12:03):
sitting on the stairscomplaining about the fact that
they have so much extra moneyleft over in their budget and
they don't know what to do withit.
And I'm sitting there, notgetting paid for this
opportunity.
I didn't say this out loud, andI totally wish I did, but I
didn't say this out loud, but Iwas like, you could pay us, like
in my brain, my brain was likescreaming at me, you could pay
(12:25):
us, you could pay us, you couldpay us, say it out loud, say it
out loud, but my um wouldn't letmy brain, my I wouldn't let my
body say it out loud.
But now I wish I had kind ofhad, because why not?
Like, I've never met thesepeople again and all of these
things, but you don'tnecessarily know that.
But that is my set horror story,and there's so many other little
details, but I want to get tolike what is the important part
(12:48):
and the meat of this episodetoday, which is boundaries.
Here's my situation withboundaries.
I have always been terrible withboundaries, literally terrible.
It's always been very hard forme to uh set clear boundaries in
my personal life and at work,really honestly everywhere,
(13:08):
because there's severaldifferent areas of your life
that you can have boundaries in.
It's always been hard for me.
It's always felt like I wasn't II have a lot of people-pleasing
behaviors too, so I think thatlike uh bleeds into this too is
like not wanting to make peopleupset, is like setting a
boundary, is ultimately makingsomebody upset, which can and
(13:29):
cannot be true.
Boundaries are such an importantthing, and something that I've
been putting a lot of emphasison lately because ultimately a
yes means very little when youcan't say no.
Yeses can be so special if a yesactually means a yes.
And I figured since I strugglewith this, this is probably
something you guys strugglewith, and something that you
(13:51):
might want a little bit of helpwith and or be seeking a little
bit of extra guidance.
And so I figured today, on themewith our Halloween episode and
our horror stories on set, thatwe could talk about boundaries.
And I have several like littlefun things for you guys today.
You know, use these resources ifyou want to and if they feel
like they'd be helpful.
Because I struggle withboundaries, I want to do this
(14:13):
with you guys.
And there's a ton of differenttypes of boundaries and plays
that you can protect yourselfand protect your energy.
So we're gonna talk a little bitabout each area of boundary
today and how you can expandyour awareness with boundaries.
So let's go through the types.
There are emotional boundaries,there are professional
boundaries, and then there arepersonal boundaries by far the
(14:36):
hardest.
Personal boundaries are by farthe hardest.
Is for me specifically, maybenot for you, but for sure the
hardest for me.
Let's start with some emotionalboundaries.
Let me just start by saying youdon't owe emotional access to
everyone.
That is so powerful.
You don't owe emotional accessto everyone.
(14:56):
One way that you can separateyour craft and your career and
your creative spirit from yourpersonal wounds is to like lean
on resources like tear sticks.
You don't have to like build upall of this baggage or hold on
all to all of this baggage justto have emotional depth in your
(15:18):
scenes.
I used to believe that I had tohold on to like if my life
started to get good and I didn'thave anything bad to pull from,
that I wouldn't be able to showemotional depth or vulnerability
within a scene, and that's justthe farthest thing from the
truth.
It's just not true.
It's a total limiting belief.
Lean on resources like tiersticks.
(15:38):
There's nothing wrong with it.
You don't have to dredge up thisterrible memory just to get a
beautiful performance.
So, I mean, that is an emotionalboundary, but it kind of leans
towards professional as well.
And then also yourvulnerability, it doesn't have
to be a skill, it's not a publicresource, and it's okay to have
emotional space with friends andfamily.
(16:01):
I actually, here's a like quicklittle pro tip for you.
Um, this is something that I dowith my closest friends, and
it's a way to just like protecteach other's energy.
If I need to vent or I need toyell or scream or whatever it is
to like get it out with afriend, I always ask before I
(16:23):
vent and before I know that I'mgonna impart some sort of
negative energy on somebodyelse.
I always ask permission.
Do you have space for me to ventto you right now?
Because there are so many timeswhere I haven't had space for
people to vent, like I've beengoing through my own shit and
they don't have that space.
And for somebody to vent to meis just like adding this extra
(16:43):
negative energy.
And it is always okay with thesepeople that I do this with for
them to say no, I don't havethat space today.
And for me to call on anotherresource, another friend for
that emotional space in depth.
But we always ask permission tovent, to impart whatever needs
to come out before we just likedrop it all on somebody.
(17:07):
Let's talk about someprofessional boundaries.
Shoots can be vulnerable in moreways than one, right?
Sometimes we're having intimacyshoots, sometimes we are doing
things we're uncomfortable withor being touched in ways that
we're uncomfortable with, evenif it's not in like an intimate
or sexual manner.
(17:27):
So this is how you know ifyou're on a set that's got good
boundaries, good professionalboundaries, is if the
expectations are clear andagreed on before the shoot, and
all of these clear guidelinesare written agreements that
clarify any intimacy or stuntsor hours or safety, and that
(17:51):
there is no like last minuteasking for things that are not
written or not clear ahead oftime or on the day.
Let's say you're showing up toset for the day and you are
supposed to be in lingerie foryour shoot that day.
You have an intimacycoordinator, you're feeling
good, and all of a sudden, lastminute, they ask you if you will
(18:12):
go full nude or semi-nude.
That's a great time to realizethat maybe this set doesn't have
great boundaries.
And what do you do in thatmoment?
Here's my next pro tip for you.
Before you go on set, create anull list of what you're
unwilling to do on set.
Your null list can include ornot include anything you want.
(18:36):
And I'm gonna read you my nulllist so that you have an idea of
what you can put on it.
I don't do nude shoots and Idon't do semi-nude shoots.
I won't do sheer anything unlessI get to pick the bodysuit that
goes underneath it.
I don't like to do anything withreligious themes because I'm
just uncomfortable with it.
That's my no list, and my nolist grows as I'm having new
(18:58):
experiences.
And here are some more things,types of things you could put on
it.
Maybe you don't want to showyourself doing drugs even if
they're pretend drugs.
Maybe you are um a pacifist andyou are non-violent, you don't
want to sort of show any sort ofviolence.
Maybe you don't want to doanything provocative, maybe you
(19:18):
aren't about politicalstatements.
Maybe that's something that youdon't want to show in your work.
You always have the right.
I think we forget a lot of timesthat we conform to script, we
conform to job, that we have theright and the opportunity to say
yes or no to any moment and anytime at any job in any scenario.
(19:41):
So that's my little pro tip foryou for professional boundaries
is create a no list ahead beforeyou go to set and continue to
add to it as you have moreexperiences.
And the last and hardest isself-boundaries and personal
boundaries.
This one is so hard.
Here's a few things that I'venoticed myself and my clients on
what they struggle with in termsof self-boundaries.
(20:05):
First and foremost is restbefore you burn out.
The one of the hardest things isjust to make sure you rest so
you don't burn out.
And rest is 100% a boundary withyourself.
I know I'm doing too much work.
My body knows I'm feelinguncomfortable.
It is time for me to rest.
Another boundary that I noticepeople crossing with themselves
(20:30):
is doing this thing wherethey're moving the goalpost
every time they hit a goalinstead of stopping and
celebrating that goal.
When you think about it, this isyou just disrespecting all the
hard work you did by not takingtime to celebrate and just
hopping onto the next goal andonto the next train.
You're not respecting all thathard work you did for yourself.
(20:52):
So that's another hard boundarythat I see people like kind of
skipping over, not doing.
And then another boundary I seepeople cross is saying yes to
too many things, is going backto something we talked about a
little bit earlier.
Was your your yeses aren'tspecial if you always say yes.
If you can't say no, then youryeses can't be special.
(21:15):
You can't say yes to thebeautiful things, the right
things, the things that make youfeel aligned and special because
you're just always saying yes,and that leads to burnout.
And if you're somebody whostruggles with saying yes too
often or people pleasing or anyof those things, here is a great
little thing for you.
Let me think about it.
(21:35):
Let me think about it.
It's not saying no, it's notsaying yes, but it's giving you
the opportunity to reflect andsay, is this something that I
actually want to do?
And come back with a strong yesor no answer.
Let me think about it.
Those are special, special,special amazing words.
And if you're somebody whostruggles with setting
(21:56):
boundaries, how do you know?
Because it's not always clear,somebody is crossing a boundary.
This is like a little likesimple thing that you'll know
right away without having tolike overanalyze it or
overthink, because I'm atextbook overthinker.
Is do you feel uncomfortable?
(22:17):
Do you feel uncomfortable whenyou say no or yes or whatever to
something?
Is that person a repeat offenderof crossing your boundaries?
And if they are, what does thatmean for that relationship that
you have?
How how is this a relationshipyou want to continue with
somebody who continues to crossyour boundaries?
(22:39):
What would your life look likewithout this person?
What does it look like with thisperson?
Is this person best for yourgrowth?
Your continued growth?
Let me make this super cleartoo.
People who love you and who arein your tribe and who are your
ride or dies will always listenwhen you are setting a boundary.
(23:06):
They will always listen,understand, and ask you
questions about your boundary.
Because they love and respectyou.
You might be surrounded by a tonof people who consistently cross
your boundaries.
I've been there before whereI've just like my entire tribe
has just been people who push myboundaries.
And slowly I was able to likerecreate a tribe of people who
(23:29):
respect and understand what Ineed and sometimes can
anticipate my needs before Ieven know I need them
anticipated.
That is a really special,special place to be in.
Before we wrap up our boundariesconversation today, I wanted to
let you know that because Istruggle with boundaries so
much, I created this thingcalled boundaries bingo.
Hee, it's so like cute andnerdy.
(23:52):
But it's like a bingo boardwhere I put all of these
different like opportunities forchange in, and all these
different opportunities forboundaries, and so you just go
through and cross off a littleum bingo square for every day,
as you as you do the boundary,obviously.
You don't just like cross themoff, cross them off, but you
(24:14):
find a way to like set aboundary every day.
And the cool thing about thisboundary bingo, it really makes
you excited to find some way toset a boundary that day.
So if that's something you'reinterested in, there'll be a
link in the show notes, I'msure.
But yeah, check that out.
I think it's gonna be reallyfun.
And before we wrap up thisepisode, because I'm trying to
(24:35):
make these 15 minutes andsomehow they end up being 35
fucking minutes every episode.
Jesus, I just have so much tosay.
The podcast is live.
No, fuck.
The podcast is also live, butthe website is live, and it's
been live for a while now, butbecause stuff gets behind and
(24:55):
not everything comes at the sametime, it's live.
It's live, yeah.
So check out my website, it'sbeautiful, guys.
It's beautiful.
So check it out, it'll be in theshow notes.
And the last thing we gotta talkabout today is next week I am
running a promo.
It's my first promo ever.
(25:18):
Have a DIY, stick it toself-sabotage course.
I love this course, it's a greatway to get like a huge major
momentum boost in your career insix weeks.
It's amazing.
The people who've gone throughit, and my beta uh round were
incredible, and I saw suchamazing growth in everybody,
(25:38):
which was really exciting.
And this course is going to beon fire soon.
So let me tell you about thiscourse.
I realize I haven't told youeven about the course yet.
So this is a six-week stick itto self-sabotage course.
It helps actors overcomeself-sabotage, build the
confidence that it takes to bookconsistent, meaningful acting
(25:59):
work.
This course helps you auditionwith confidence, feel worthy of
the roles that you want,overcome self-doubt and fear of
failure, stop procrastinating,build some momentum in your
acting career, and helps youbook consistent, meaningful
acting work.
And it's not just like someboring old six-week course.
(26:21):
It has like mini games and allof these fun things tied into it
because I know that a lot ofpeople will buy a course, myself
included, and never finish itbecause it's just not as fun or
as enjoyable as it sounds.
So I've really built this courseto be fun and continue to be fun
as you're learning how to buildpositive new habits and as
(26:43):
you're learning about the alterego method, it's gonna be
fantastic.
So you honestly really don'twant to miss out on this course.
This is like the last time toget it at the cheapest it's
ever, ever gonna be.
What's included in this courseis lifetime access to six weeks
of modules, worksheet and bonusresources to help you implement
(27:03):
all the things that you learn.
There's also a bonus modulethat's all about tapping into
the it factor and how to makeyourself magnetic.
And then you get two free bonusmeditations to help you stop
self-sabotaging and startexpanding your comfort with
success.
And the best thing about thiswhole course is that you get a
(27:24):
seven-day money-back guarantee.
If if you go on the course, youexplore it a little bit and it
feels like it's not right foryou, there's no worries because
you have seven days to get yourmoney back.
And the cart is gonna close onNovember 12th for this, and it's
not gonna reopen because, like Isaid, it's gonna be the new
revamped course.
We're not revamping the coursecontent for the most part, but
(27:46):
we're gonna change the name ofthe course.
I'm gonna make it a little bitmore accessible.
We're gonna change the platformit's in.
There's just like a lot oflittle things that are gonna
change to just make it betterand better based on the feedback
that I got in my first betaround.
Right now it's priced at$2.97,but we're gonna revamp it,
right?
And the price is gonna go up.
And so now is really the besttime to buy because you're gonna
(28:07):
get the OG course, but thenyou're also gonna get the
revamped new course when itcomes out in the spring.
Here are the dates.
So we're gonna start our promoon November 5th and go till the
12th.
So 12th is the last day to getthis course at 297.
So check out my course becauseseriously, it is a game changer
and I've seen it change actors'lives already.
(28:28):
But thank you guys for hangingout with me today.
I hope you enjoyed thisconversation on boundaries.
It really is an important one.
And check out that boundarybingo.
I think you'll find it veryhelpful.
That's a wrap on today's episodeof The Glow Up Year.
Thanks for hanging out with me!I love having you along for the
(28:50):
rides.
We're just getting started, andyour glow-up is only getting
brighter.
If you felt inspired today, hitsubscribe or leave a quick
review or share this episodewith another fellow dreamer in
your circle.
If you want more support, youcan work with me one-on-one as
your career mindset coach.
I'll help you clear out thosemental blocks, find balance, and
(29:13):
take some bold steps towardsyour career goals.
You'll find all the details towork with me in the show notes.
And of course, come hang outwith me on Instagram or TikTok
at MegSallsberry Creative formore behind the scenes and pep
talks and just fun.
Remember, your glow up isunfolding one bold move at a
(29:37):
time.
Keep going, keep dreamingbigger, and I'll catch you on
the next one.
I could not believe that they were asking me to
fight blind.
Like, in what world do you thinkit's a good idea in your student
film for me to fight somebodywhen I can't see?
What I'm telling you right nowis I cannot see.
And I had to really fight andstick to that boundary that day.
You always have the right.
(00:21):
I think we forget a lot of timesthat we conform to script, we
conform to job, that we have theright and the opportunity to say
no to any moment and any time atany job in any scenario.
(00:53):
I'm Meg, actress, model, andmindset coach for actors.
Think of me as yourbehind-the-scenes bestie for
chasing dreams, surviving plottwists, and building something
big.
Here we talk about it all.
Auditions, photo shoots, mindsetchips, script prep, and the
(01:14):
career curveballs that nobodyprepares you for.
I'll share the highs and thehard lessons in real time
because growing in this industryisn't always pretty, but it's
always worth it.
If you're ready to ditchself-sabotage, step into your
confidence and build the careerand mindset you've been dreaming
of.
Grab your favorite drink, getcozy, and let's dive in.
(01:39):
Hey y'all! Welcome back toanother episode of the Glow Up
Year.
Yeah.
Okay, today is a Halloweenthemed episode, and I'm so
excited.
We're uh yeah.
Oh, I have so much to tell you.
Okay, we're gonna stick to theHalloween-theme, even though the
(02:00):
episode is gonna um drop acouple days after Halloween.
But I have been looking forwardto this episode.
I can't tell you how long I havehad this plan for this episode
for months now, and I've been soexcited for this episode.
So here it goes.
Today we are talking abouthorror stories on set.
(02:21):
Ooh, I'm gonna bring you throughone of my set experiences that
was crazy.
We're gonna talk about my horrorstory on set, and then we're
gonna bring it back to y'all,and we're gonna talk about some
mindset.
Before we get started, you'regonna start to notice some
(02:42):
changes with the podcast, andI'm not gonna get too deep into
it because we're gonna talkabout it next episode quite
thoroughly.
This episode, I just want you tostart to notice you're gonna see
some changes.
The outro, the intro is gonnachange a little bit.
So stay tuned.
We're gonna do some really coolshifts in you guys' favor.
So I'm very excited to sharethose with you, and they're
(03:03):
coming up soon.
One of the biggest shifts,though, that I the reason I had
to talk about this today isbecause, well, not because we
are starting a video podcast.
This is all on video now, y'all.
So we can sit here and sip ourlittle cuppies of tea together
or coffee or whatever and talkabout all the amazing things.
(03:26):
So if you're with us joining ustoday via video, then you'll see
that my beautiful mug today is alittle hedgehog.
She's so cute.
So I'll be sipping out of myhedgehog the whole episode.
I encourage you to have a coolass mug to sip with me.
And if you are listeningauditorily, you can just imagine
my cute ass hedgehog mug.
(03:47):
It's in it actually looks like ahedgehog, like it's a little
shape of a hedgehog.
It's very cute.
So you know what?
Let's just take a let's take asip together.
But back to set horror stories.
Ooh.
So this is my worst set horrorexperience.
(04:11):
I can't okay.
We'll just start at thebeginning.
Okay, so this was a studentfilm.
I was aware it was a studentfilm, okay, and this was back in
the early days, but I got ascript for this like alien short
film, and I had to drive down tolike New Hampshire, Vermont.
I can't remember.
Um, but it was like a six-hourdrive.
(04:33):
It was a long drive to do thisunpaid student film.
They had sold to me that so uhspoil alert, I'm the alien.
So they had sold to me that thealien makeup was gonna be really
cool and veiny and very awesome.
These cool opaque contacts, somy entire eye would be white.
(04:55):
I was so excited for this likecrazy makeup transformation.
It's gonna be really fun.
And I'm not gonna go too deepinto the story because there are
a lot of like weird things, butlike leading up to this, but I'm
just gonna give you the like themain crux of the story.
So I've driven a long way to getto this place.
We're gonna stay overnight inthe house we're filming in,
(05:16):
which is kind of convenient andgreat.
I pick up the hair style or hairand makeup stylist.
She lives in um Maine as well.
And last minute her ride fellthrough, so I picked her up and
we drove the entire way downthis like six hours.
It was crazy.
It was kind of an awkward carride because she wasn't very
talkative and I didn't reallyknow what to do.
(05:36):
So, but whatever.
I was like nice to like have anopportunity to bond with your
hair and makeup artist beforethe like did the day of crazy
makeup.
And I'd looked at all of hersocial media and she had some
really cool things up there, andso we go, we're filming, right?
And it's like I think it's asecond day, and today is the
this the day that we're gonna dothe crazy like makeup.
(05:59):
My call time's first.
I'm early in the morning becauseI have like four hours of makeup
to happen.
And it turns out that the makeupartist was fighting with the
director, and so I wake up thatnext morning, I come to sit in
the chair, I've heard the theideas, he wants to do like
crazy, like veiny things goingacross my face, and the makeup
(06:22):
artist is angry with him, and soshe tells me, I'm just gonna do
what I want.
And of course, this is like anawkward position for me because
I'm like, do I uh like I can'tpiss her off more because she
has the power to make me looklike crap.
So I guess I have to like kindof side with her, or not
necessarily side with her, butI've got to like stay engaged
(06:45):
with this girl because she'sgonna be doing my makeup and I'm
gonna look crazy if I don't stayengaged with her.
So I'm like listening to herevent and all of the things.
Before I know it, she's decidedshe's gonna change the entire
look from what was agreed onbefore, which was crazy veins
all over my face, to this isgonna sound so rude.
(07:08):
But I ended up looking like aburnt marshmallow.
Like burnt marshmallow.
She just kept gluing cottonballs to my face and then like
painting them and gluing themand painting them.
(07:31):
This is I'm gonna drop a pictureif you're listening to the video
podcast.
This is what I look like, but Ididn't know what to do, and I
sat there for four hours, likegetting worse and worse and
worse looking.
And at first it looked like kindof okay, but as the day went on,
like more of my skin startedlike peeking through in
different areas, and so I justlook like burnt marshmallow,
(07:53):
like it just looked like badmakeup.
Let me let me just reel.
Without like without being hate,I'm not saying her name.
I I'm not saying that this onelook defined her entire career
because it does not, and ifyou're listening, it did not,
but I looked wild, like wildbad.
We go to film, and this is thisis where the story gets crazy.
(08:17):
So the night before we hadscheduled like some practice
because there's this whole alienfight scene, right?
And so we are fighting, we'vescheduled the practice.
I like jump on somebody on thebed and like straddle them and
punch them, and then I roll offthe bed, and I go over to the
other guy and I grab him by thelike the neck against the wall.
It's like crazy wild stuff.
(08:39):
And I had recorded it because Iwanted to kind of like continue
to practice it in my mind and doall like of course we practice
it physically for safetypurposes, and all of this part
of this was safe.
Everything was safe.
Let me say that because you'rehearing horror stories right
now.
So everything's safe,everything's planned.
We go to film and we decidewe're gonna put the um contacts
(09:00):
in, and I've never put contactsin before, y'all.
So I was not prepared for this.
Not prepared.
And so she puts the I couldn'tdo it myself because they're
full, like they're not just overthe iris, they're like full eye
contacts.
And so she's putting them in.
We're struggling.
It took like 20 minutes to getthem in my eyes because my eyes
are just so sensitive.
She finally gets them in and I'mblind.
(09:25):
Like they're not opaque orsee-through or whatever that
word is.
I cannot see anything.
Not being able to see anythingwouldn't be so bad if I didn't
have a fight scene issue.
And I kid you not.
The guys, the director and thelike camera op, they come up to
(09:50):
me and they say, You can stillfight though, right?
I'm just gonna leave a moment ofsilence here.
You can still fight though,right?
No, I can't fucking see.
I would fucking hurt people or Ihurt myself.
I was like, absolutely not, Icannot fight.
(10:13):
Like, in what world do you thinkit's a good idea in your student
film for me to fight somebodywhen I can't see?
What I'm telling you right nowis I cannot see.
And I had to really fight andstick to that boundary that day
because I was like, safety isvery important to me, especially
on set, especially as talent,but and crew as well.
(10:36):
But I could not believe thatthey were asking me to fight
blind for a student film.
And I had to stick so hard tothat boundary because they kept
trying to convince me.
And finally, I said, This is mysolution to this, guys.
You can shoot the coverage youwant with my eyes like this
right now, because this took 20minutes to get my eye.
(10:57):
You can shoot whatever coverageyou want face forward of me like
this, any like still moments.
We can like I can straddle thisdude on the bed, and I can look
up at camera, whatever you want.
Not that I know where camera is,but whatever you want.
I just cannot actually do thefight.
You so you can shoot all of thefront of my face where you want
(11:18):
to see the contacts, and then Ican take these bad boys out, and
we can shoot all the other shit.
Like where I'm running at themfrom behind, all of that stuff.
But you cannot right now ask meto shoot like this.
No way.
Absolutely not.
No.
Later on that day, I was sittingthere getting my makeup taken
(11:42):
off, and mind you, I'm notgetting paid for this.
This was an unpaid opportunitythat I drove very far for to get
something for my reel, and endedup being not real worthy at all
at the end of the day.
The director-producer guy,again, we're talking about
children and short films and allof these things, so I'm not
saying what they did is right orappropriate or correct, is
(12:03):
sitting on the stairscomplaining about the fact that
they have so much extra moneyleft over in their budget and
they don't know what to do withit.
And I'm sitting there, notgetting paid for this
opportunity.
I didn't say this out loud, andI totally wish I did, but I
didn't say this out loud, but Iwas like, you could pay us, like
in my brain, my brain was likescreaming at me, you could pay
(12:25):
us, you could pay us, you couldpay us, say it out loud, say it
out loud, but my um wouldn't letmy brain, my I wouldn't let my
body say it out loud.
But now I wish I had kind ofhad, because why not?
Like, I've never met thesepeople again and all of these
things, but you don'tnecessarily know that.
But that is my set horror story,and there's so many other little
details, but I want to get tolike what is the important part
(12:48):
and the meat of this episodetoday, which is boundaries.
Here's my situation withboundaries.
I have always been terrible withboundaries, literally terrible.
It's always been very hard forme to uh set clear boundaries in
my personal life and at work,really honestly everywhere,
(13:08):
because there's severaldifferent areas of your life
that you can have boundaries in.
It's always been hard for me.
It's always felt like I wasn't II have a lot of people-pleasing
behaviors too, so I think thatlike uh bleeds into this too is
like not wanting to make peopleupset, is like setting a
boundary, is ultimately makingsomebody upset, which can and
(13:29):
cannot be true.
Boundaries are such an importantthing, and something that I've
been putting a lot of emphasison lately because ultimately a
yes means very little when youcan't say no.
Yeses can be so special if a yesactually means a yes.
And I figured since I strugglewith this, this is probably
something you guys strugglewith, and something that you
(13:51):
might want a little bit of helpwith and or be seeking a little
bit of extra guidance.
And so I figured today, on themewith our Halloween episode and
our horror stories on set, thatwe could talk about boundaries.
And I have several like littlefun things for you guys today.
You know, use these resources ifyou want to and if they feel
like they'd be helpful.
Because I struggle withboundaries, I want to do this
(14:13):
with you guys.
And there's a ton of differenttypes of boundaries and plays
that you can protect yourselfand protect your energy.
So we're gonna talk a little bitabout each area of boundary
today and how you can expandyour awareness with boundaries.
So let's go through the types.
There are emotional boundaries,there are professional
boundaries, and then there arepersonal boundaries by far the
(14:36):
hardest.
Personal boundaries are by farthe hardest.
Is for me specifically, maybenot for you, but for sure the
hardest for me.
Let's start with some emotionalboundaries.
Let me just start by saying youdon't owe emotional access to
everyone.
That is so powerful.
You don't owe emotional accessto everyone.
(14:56):
One way that you can separateyour craft and your career and
your creative spirit from yourpersonal wounds is to like lean
on resources like tear sticks.
You don't have to like build upall of this baggage or hold on
all to all of this baggage justto have emotional depth in your
(15:18):
scenes.
I used to believe that I had tohold on to like if my life
started to get good and I didn'thave anything bad to pull from,
that I wouldn't be able to showemotional depth or vulnerability
within a scene, and that's justthe farthest thing from the
truth.
It's just not true.
It's a total limiting belief.
Lean on resources like tiersticks.
(15:38):
There's nothing wrong with it.
You don't have to dredge up thisterrible memory just to get a
beautiful performance.
So, I mean, that is an emotionalboundary, but it kind of leans
towards professional as well.
And then also yourvulnerability, it doesn't have
to be a skill, it's not a publicresource, and it's okay to have
emotional space with friends andfamily.
(16:01):
I actually, here's a like quicklittle pro tip for you.
Um, this is something that I dowith my closest friends, and
it's a way to just like protecteach other's energy.
If I need to vent or I need toyell or scream or whatever it is
to like get it out with afriend, I always ask before I
(16:23):
vent and before I know that I'mgonna impart some sort of
negative energy on somebodyelse.
I always ask permission.
Do you have space for me to ventto you right now?
Because there are so many timeswhere I haven't had space for
people to vent, like I've beengoing through my own shit and
they don't have that space.
And for somebody to vent to meis just like adding this extra
(16:43):
negative energy.
And it is always okay with thesepeople that I do this with for
them to say no, I don't havethat space today.
And for me to call on anotherresource, another friend for
that emotional space in depth.
But we always ask permission tovent, to impart whatever needs
to come out before we just likedrop it all on somebody.
(17:07):
Let's talk about someprofessional boundaries.
Shoots can be vulnerable in moreways than one, right?
Sometimes we're having intimacyshoots, sometimes we are doing
things we're uncomfortable withor being touched in ways that
we're uncomfortable with, evenif it's not in like an intimate
or sexual manner.
(17:27):
So this is how you know ifyou're on a set that's got good
boundaries, good professionalboundaries, is if the
expectations are clear andagreed on before the shoot, and
all of these clear guidelinesare written agreements that
clarify any intimacy or stuntsor hours or safety, and that
(17:51):
there is no like last minuteasking for things that are not
written or not clear ahead oftime or on the day.
Let's say you're showing up toset for the day and you are
supposed to be in lingerie foryour shoot that day.
You have an intimacycoordinator, you're feeling
good, and all of a sudden, lastminute, they ask you if you will
(18:12):
go full nude or semi-nude.
That's a great time to realizethat maybe this set doesn't have
great boundaries.
And what do you do in thatmoment?
Here's my next pro tip for you.
Before you go on set, create anull list of what you're
unwilling to do on set.
Your null list can include ornot include anything you want.
(18:36):
And I'm gonna read you my nulllist so that you have an idea of
what you can put on it.
I don't do nude shoots and Idon't do semi-nude shoots.
I won't do sheer anything unlessI get to pick the bodysuit that
goes underneath it.
I don't like to do anything withreligious themes because I'm
just uncomfortable with it.
That's my no list, and my nolist grows as I'm having new
(18:58):
experiences.
And here are some more things,types of things you could put on
it.
Maybe you don't want to showyourself doing drugs even if
they're pretend drugs.
Maybe you are um a pacifist andyou are non-violent, you don't
want to sort of show any sort ofviolence.
Maybe you don't want to doanything provocative, maybe you
(19:18):
aren't about politicalstatements.
Maybe that's something that youdon't want to show in your work.
You always have the right.
I think we forget a lot of timesthat we conform to script, we
conform to job, that we have theright and the opportunity to say
yes or no to any moment and anytime at any job in any scenario.
(19:41):
So that's my little pro tip foryou for professional boundaries
is create a no list ahead beforeyou go to set and continue to
add to it as you have moreexperiences.
And the last and hardest isself-boundaries and personal
boundaries.
This one is so hard.
Here's a few things that I'venoticed myself and my clients on
what they struggle with in termsof self-boundaries.
(20:05):
First and foremost is restbefore you burn out.
The one of the hardest things isjust to make sure you rest so
you don't burn out.
And rest is 100% a boundary withyourself.
I know I'm doing too much work.
My body knows I'm feelinguncomfortable.
It is time for me to rest.
Another boundary that I noticepeople crossing with themselves
(20:30):
is doing this thing wherethey're moving the goalpost
every time they hit a goalinstead of stopping and
celebrating that goal.
When you think about it, this isyou just disrespecting all the
hard work you did by not takingtime to celebrate and just
hopping onto the next goal andonto the next train.
You're not respecting all thathard work you did for yourself.
(20:52):
So that's another hard boundarythat I see people like kind of
skipping over, not doing.
And then another boundary I seepeople cross is saying yes to
too many things, is going backto something we talked about a
little bit earlier.
Was your your yeses aren'tspecial if you always say yes.
If you can't say no, then youryeses can't be special.
(21:15):
You can't say yes to thebeautiful things, the right
things, the things that make youfeel aligned and special because
you're just always saying yes,and that leads to burnout.
And if you're somebody whostruggles with saying yes too
often or people pleasing or anyof those things, here is a great
little thing for you.
Let me think about it.
(21:35):
Let me think about it.
It's not saying no, it's notsaying yes, but it's giving you
the opportunity to reflect andsay, is this something that I
actually want to do?
And come back with a strong yesor no answer.
Let me think about it.
Those are special, special,special amazing words.
And if you're somebody whostruggles with setting
(21:56):
boundaries, how do you know?
Because it's not always clear,somebody is crossing a boundary.
This is like a little likesimple thing that you'll know
right away without having tolike overanalyze it or
overthink, because I'm atextbook overthinker.
Is do you feel uncomfortable?
(22:17):
Do you feel uncomfortable whenyou say no or yes or whatever to
something?
Is that person a repeat offenderof crossing your boundaries?
And if they are, what does thatmean for that relationship that
you have?
How how is this a relationshipyou want to continue with
somebody who continues to crossyour boundaries?
(22:39):
What would your life look likewithout this person?
What does it look like with thisperson?
Is this person best for yourgrowth?
Your continued growth?
Let me make this super cleartoo.
People who love you and who arein your tribe and who are your
ride or dies will always listenwhen you are setting a boundary.
(23:06):
They will always listen,understand, and ask you
questions about your boundary.
Because they love and respectyou.
You might be surrounded by a tonof people who consistently cross
your boundaries.
I've been there before whereI've just like my entire tribe
has just been people who push myboundaries.
And slowly I was able to likerecreate a tribe of people who
(23:29):
respect and understand what Ineed and sometimes can
anticipate my needs before Ieven know I need them
anticipated.
That is a really special,special place to be in.
Before we wrap up our boundariesconversation today, I wanted to
let you know that because Istruggle with boundaries so
much, I created this thingcalled boundaries bingo.
Hee, it's so like cute andnerdy.
(23:52):
But it's like a bingo boardwhere I put all of these
different like opportunities forchange in, and all these
different opportunities forboundaries, and so you just go
through and cross off a littleum bingo square for every day,
as you as you do the boundary,obviously.
You don't just like cross themoff, cross them off, but you
(24:14):
find a way to like set aboundary every day.
And the cool thing about thisboundary bingo, it really makes
you excited to find some way toset a boundary that day.
So if that's something you'reinterested in, there'll be a
link in the show notes, I'msure.
But yeah, check that out.
I think it's gonna be reallyfun.
And before we wrap up thisepisode, because I'm trying to
(24:35):
make these 15 minutes andsomehow they end up being 35
fucking minutes every episode.
Jesus, I just have so much tosay.
The podcast is live.
No, fuck.
The podcast is also live, butthe website is live, and it's
been live for a while now, butbecause stuff gets behind and
(24:55):
not everything comes at the sametime, it's live.
It's live, yeah.
So check out my website, it'sbeautiful, guys.
It's beautiful.
So check it out, it'll be in theshow notes.
And the last thing we gotta talkabout today is next week I am
running a promo.
It's my first promo ever.
(25:18):
Have a DIY, stick it toself-sabotage course.
I love this course, it's a greatway to get like a huge major
momentum boost in your career insix weeks.
It's amazing.
The people who've gone throughit, and my beta uh round were
incredible, and I saw suchamazing growth in everybody,
(25:38):
which was really exciting.
And this course is going to beon fire soon.
So let me tell you about thiscourse.
I realize I haven't told youeven about the course yet.
So this is a six-week stick itto self-sabotage course.
It helps actors overcomeself-sabotage, build the
confidence that it takes to bookconsistent, meaningful acting
(25:59):
work.
This course helps you auditionwith confidence, feel worthy of
the roles that you want,overcome self-doubt and fear of
failure, stop procrastinating,build some momentum in your
acting career, and helps youbook consistent, meaningful
acting work.
And it's not just like someboring old six-week course.
(26:21):
It has like mini games and allof these fun things tied into it
because I know that a lot ofpeople will buy a course, myself
included, and never finish itbecause it's just not as fun or
as enjoyable as it sounds.
So I've really built this courseto be fun and continue to be fun
as you're learning how to buildpositive new habits and as
(26:43):
you're learning about the alterego method, it's gonna be
fantastic.
So you honestly really don'twant to miss out on this course.
This is like the last time toget it at the cheapest it's
ever, ever gonna be.
What's included in this courseis lifetime access to six weeks
of modules, worksheet and bonusresources to help you implement
(27:03):
all the things that you learn.
There's also a bonus modulethat's all about tapping into
the it factor and how to makeyourself magnetic.
And then you get two free bonusmeditations to help you stop
self-sabotaging and startexpanding your comfort with
success.
And the best thing about thiswhole course is that you get a
(27:24):
seven-day money-back guarantee.
If if you go on the course, youexplore it a little bit and it
feels like it's not right foryou, there's no worries because
you have seven days to get yourmoney back.
And the cart is gonna close onNovember 12th for this, and it's
not gonna reopen because, like Isaid, it's gonna be the new
revamped course.
We're not revamping the coursecontent for the most part, but
(27:46):
we're gonna change the name ofthe course.
I'm gonna make it a little bitmore accessible.
We're gonna change the platformit's in.
There's just like a lot oflittle things that are gonna
change to just make it betterand better based on the feedback
that I got in my first betaround.
Right now it's priced at$2.97,but we're gonna revamp it,
right?
And the price is gonna go up.
And so now is really the besttime to buy because you're gonna
(28:07):
get the OG course, but thenyou're also gonna get the
revamped new course when itcomes out in the spring.
Here are the dates.
So we're gonna start our promoon November 5th and go till the
12th.
So 12th is the last day to getthis course at 297.
So check out my course becauseseriously, it is a game changer
and I've seen it change actors'lives already.
(28:28):
But thank you guys for hangingout with me today.
I hope you enjoyed thisconversation on boundaries.
It really is an important one.
And check out that boundarybingo.
I think you'll find it veryhelpful.
That's a wrap on today's episodeof The Glow Up Year.
Thanks for hanging out with me!I love having you along for the
(28:50):
rides.
We're just getting started, andyour glow-up is only getting
brighter.
If you felt inspired today, hitsubscribe or leave a quick
review or share this episodewith another fellow dreamer in
your circle.
If you want more support, youcan work with me one-on-one as
your career mindset coach.
I'll help you clear out thosemental blocks, find balance, and
(29:13):
take some bold steps towardsyour career goals.
You'll find all the details towork with me in the show notes.
And of course, come hang outwith me on Instagram or TikTok
at MegSallsberry Creative formore behind the scenes and pep
talks and just fun.
Remember, your glow up isunfolding one bold move at a
(29:37):
time.
Keep going, keep dreamingbigger, and I'll catch you on
the next one.
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