Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Have you ever faced
the unexpected challenge of
preterm premature rupture ofmembranes PROM during pregnancy?
In this episode of the GoldenHour Birth Podcast, we sit down
with Shayla, who vulnerablyshares her journey of delivering
her daughter at 30 weeks due toPROM and navigating the NICU
for 48 days.
(00:20):
Shayla's story brings up theimportant question how do you
advocate for your premature baby, take care of yourself and find
support when faced with theoverwhelming experience of
having preemie in the NICU?
Join us as we explore the powerof trusting your instincts,
seeking help and finding healingthrough sharing your story.
Shayla's experience highlightsthe importance of self-care and
(00:44):
leaning on others during thistrying time.
Tune in to gain valuableinsights on facing the unknown
with strength and resilience andlearn how it is possible to
have a healthy, thriving childafter premature problems.
Shayla's story offers hope,guidance and a reminder that,
even through the toughestsituations, mickey parents can
find the support they need toget through it.
(01:05):
The Golden Hour Birth Podcast apodcast about real birth
stories and creating connectionsthrough our shared experiences.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Childbirth isn't just
about the child.
It's about the person who gavebirth, their lives, their wisdom
and their empowerment.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
We're Liz and Natalie
, the Golden Hour Birth Podcast,
and we're here to laugh withyou, cry with you and hold space
for you.
Welcome to the Golden HourBirth Podcast.
I am your co-host, Liz.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
And I'm your co-host,
natalie, and tonight we have
Shayla from Pennsylvania on.
Thanks so much for coming ontonight, shayla.
Thank you for having me.
Yeah, so if you want to goahead and tell listeners a
little bit about you and yourfamily, I am 24.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
I had my daughter
whenever I was 22.
I was working full time andI've been a stay-at-home mom
since I've had her, and I'vebeen a stay-at-home mom since
I've had her.
Awesome, she was born at 30weeks, okay, and she was in the
NICU for 48 days.
Speaker 2 (02:12):
Oh wow, oh.
So if you want to kind of goahead and go into, like find out
that you were pregnant and whatpregnancy was like.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
Whenever I found out,
I wasn't entirely expecting it.
I was actually looking for adifferent job, so I put that on
hold.
I was very excited but nervousat the same time, and pregnancy
for me I was.
It wasn't very like normal,like I didn't really have any
complications, I was just sickall the time.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Yes, I feel like
girls definitely can do that to
us.
Yes, and then?
So we can just go ahead andjump into your birth story,
unless you want to add anythingmore about pregnancy.
Speaker 3 (03:02):
I actually had.
I think it was like my 30 weekappointment and I never made it
to the appointment that day.
Um, I woke up in the middle ofthe night and I was.
I ended up rushing to thehospital because I thought my
water had broke and whenever Igot there they had diagnosed me
with p-prong, like prematurepreterm rupture of membrane, and
(03:26):
from there they were likeyou're staying on hospital bed
rest until the baby comes.
So I was on hospital bed restfor nine days until she arrived,
oh wow, so couldn't leave.
No, I was given like two steroidshots and, like I think, like
(03:47):
two rounds of magnesium.
Okay to try to like slow andlike prevent and um help her
development yeah, had you um hadany contractions or anything?
Speaker 1 (04:00):
or did they stop it
before they?
Speaker 3 (04:03):
stopped it like
before, like since it was like
my first time.
I had no idea like whatcontractions felt like and I
never really actually felt anycontractions.
It was all back labor.
So I just kept complaining thatmy back hurts.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Yeah.
So like while you were on thebed rest, you felt like you were
just like having back labor thewhole time.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
That wasn't up until
like two days before delivery.
Okay, the entire time I hadlike no complications.
I didn't feel any contractions.
The only symptom I had was thatmy water was broken, some
leakage.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
Yeah, wow, was it
like every day they were like
you have to stay?
Or was or was there any like,oh, you might be able to go home
if something?
Or were they just well?
Speaker 3 (04:53):
there are like
stories where like women do like
reshill and like they are ableto carry the term and go home.
But that wasn't the case for me.
Um, they pretty much told me ifI made it to 34 weeks and they
were going to induce me.
So I was there for the wholeride.
Speaker 2 (05:09):
Oh my gosh, wow Were
they doing like constant
ultrasounds to check fluid andall?
Speaker 3 (05:15):
that I think they
only did one ultrasound and
whenever they told me they saidit was like hardly like
measurable, measurable.
But your body keeps making more, so I think the entire time she
had less than a couplemillimeters of fluid for nine
(05:35):
days.
Wow.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
Did you feel the
leakage?
Was it constant leakage or wasit a big gush?
Speaker 3 (05:43):
Oh no, at first it
was like a big gush and then it
was like a leakage throughout,like the nine days.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Yeah.
So after the nine days werethey like, ok, we got to kind of
do something from here.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
Well, actually I was
going into labor.
What happened was they put meon magnesium on a Monday and
then they made me it was mysecond time they made me stay in
labor delivery again, and thenthey sent me back up in the
morning.
But one of the nurses actuallyput the TOCO monitor on
backwards and I was sent back upto my room later that day and
(06:28):
then, not even like 12 hourslater, I was checked and they
were like oh, you're sixcentimeters, you're having a
baby today.
Oh my gosh.
And I'm like, excuse me, oh mygosh the heart heartbeat monitor
for her.
Yeah they put it on back.
Yeah that, yeah, like thecontractions and like the
(06:48):
heartbeat, like it was all onbackwards, oh my gosh.
Oh, I thought about sayingsomething I'm like, but I'm not
qualified in that area, butturns out I should have said
something.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Yeah, oh my gosh um,
how did magnesium make you feel?
Did you feel loopy on it?
Speaker 3 (07:05):
Because I know a lot
of women say that it really
messes them up the localhospital only had a level two
(07:27):
NICU and they said we don'tdeliver babies under 32 weeks.
So they sent me into Pittsburghand that was the first time I
actually had like the magnesium,like during like the ambulance
ride, like whenever they liketransported me, and I just
remember feeling hot.
I was like get me like eightice packs now, like I am on fire
, yeah, oh.
But yeah, then the second timethey were gonna give it to me
I'm like ice pack, I need an icepack now.
(07:48):
Yeah, but terrible, I just feltlike really warm.
A lot of people like say itmakes them feel like loopy and
drunk.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
I know um how far
away are you from Pittsburgh?
About 90 minutes, okay, so nottoo far, but not local, no not
local.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Did they take you in
an ambulance?
Speaker 3 (08:15):
We went to the local
hospital about 40 minutes away,
and then they transported usinto the city by ambulance.
Yeah, oh boy, us into the cityby ambulance, yeah, oh boy, yeah
, because I call it like theon-call number for, like my oby
and I was like I don't know if Ishould go in.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
They're like, yeah,
they're going so you found out
that you were six centimeters.
What happened there?
Speaker 3 (08:40):
they pretty much told
me that you're having a baby
today.
Well, whenever I whenever Ifirst went in, I think, I was
only like one centimeter andthen, throughout like the nine
days, I was like progressing,hmm, and then, from six
centimeters on, it was very slow.
I think they told me that atlike 9 am on Tuesday and I
didn't have her until likealmost 3 am on Wednesday.
Speaker 1 (09:02):
Okay, so then were
they yeah, were they just
treating you like you were, justlike going into labor, then
Pretty much.
Speaker 3 (09:13):
I kind of stayed
there for like nine days so it
was pretty much like a hotel forme, almost Like they knew I was
going to have the baby soon.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
So yeah, did it was
just kind of like a waiting game
yeah, did you um like, were youable to like get out of bed and
labor?
Did you like labor at all toget to 10 centimeters, or did
you have a c-section?
Speaker 3 (09:37):
uh, no, I was
actually allowed to move around
and I used like the peanutpillow and the balls for a while
and I actually waited untillike eight centimeters to get an
epidural, so at that point thatI was bedridden, but other than
that it was very smooth sailing.
It wasn't no sea suction oranything like that.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Yeah, well, that's
nice that you could still move
around and everything.
That's really great to hear.
So what happened next?
So I mean, I'm sure like theNICU team was already in your
room and kind of taking her awayfrom there yeah, pretty much
they explained like the best andworst case scenario.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
The hope was that
whenever she was born, that she
was breathing on her own.
So whenever she was born, shewas breathing on her own, so it
was like the best thing that wecould have ever asked for.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
Yeah had you found
out before, um, if it was going
to be a boy or girl?
Speaker 3 (10:39):
uh, yeah, we actually
had a gender reveal about four
weeks earlier, oh wow.
And my baby shower was a monthaway at that point, oh no oh my
gosh, so did you bring her?
Speaker 2 (10:53):
no, you, I guess you
couldn't have.
Speaker 3 (10:55):
She was still in the
NICU we actually had, um,
there's like something calledlike NICU.
It's like a live baby monitorlike um, your NICU baby, and we
actually had that hooked up to atv at our baby shower oh,
that's so sweet.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
I've never heard of
that before.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
Yeah, one of the
nurses.
She was really great forfeeding time.
At that point they were alreadyintroducing a bottle to her to
eat by mouth.
So the NICU nurse.
She put a little sign in theisolate out for lunch.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
Aw, that's awesome,
so yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
That's funny, yeah.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
so right after she
came came out kind of what
happened from there um, fromthat point they just set her on
me briefly and they let dad cutthe cord and that was pretty
much it.
They whisked her way over tothe isolate I mean the warmer
and they put like a c-pap on her.
(11:53):
He went over and took pictures,they wheeled her by for like
what seemed like 30 seconds andtook her down to the nicki at
like four or five minutes old ohwow, how big was she.
She was uh, three pounds ouncesand 15 inches long.
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (12:13):
Peanut.
Oh yes, so sweet.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
How are you?
Speaker 3 (12:21):
feeling right after
Good.
It was actually like veryrelieving because I could
actually see her.
I could see how she was doing.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
It was a lot better
than, like the nine days in
purgatory that I spent beforethen yeah, that makes sense, you
can like, you can like see her,she can like grow and you know
eat and everything.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
Yeah, it's a lot
better knowing like the known
than like just sitting therefearing the unknown.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
Yeah yeah, that makes
sense.
How was your mental healthduring her time in the NICU?
Speaker 3 (12:53):
Oh, it was up and
down.
Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
Yeah, how long did
you end up staying in the
hospital after you delivered?
Speaker 3 (13:06):
They told me that I
could leave after 24 hours, but
I chose to stay 48.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Okay, yeah, that's
good to stay.
48 okay, yeah, that's good.
Um, so she was in the NICU for48 days.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
Were you like going
up there every day and visiting
almost every day?
Yeah, um, I actually did takebreaks because the NICU isn't
like the happiest place on earthto be.
Yeah and um, whenever you go inthere like you want to be calm
and you have to have like a goodhead of you know mental
stability, so it's hard to go inthere like you want to be calm
and you have like a good head ofyou know mental stability, so
it's hard to go in there, likewhenever you're just not feeling
it.
So there were days that I would, that I did take breaks, yeah,
(13:43):
for sure, but for the most partI was driving up there four or
five, six days a week.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Wow yeah, and that's
90 minutes.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah yeah.
Were there any setbacks thatshe had, or was it pretty much
just smooth sailing?
Speaker 3 (14:00):
She was pretty good.
Honestly.
She was on a CPAP and theoxygen she actually did end up
coming home on oxygen, but otherthan that, the only setback
that there was was groomertrials and keeping her body
temperature out of the ice a lot.
Yeah that's good.
(14:22):
And she was eating.
Yeah, she didn't have a problemeating.
Taking food by mouth Stilldoesn't.
So, yeah, everything was justmoose nailing after that.
That's good.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
How was it when she
came home?
How were you feeling Scared?
Speaker 3 (14:41):
Yeah, we had home
health nurses come twice a week
for two weeks and they didn't doanything with the oxygen, they
just weighed her to make surethat like she was like gaining
weight and then the oxygen waslike all on me.
So I actually had likerespiratory therapists come to
the house and like deliver theequipment and teach me how to
(15:04):
use it.
Like before I even like tookher home and then the NICU
actually gave me clearance tolike wean her off oxygen at home
.
Oh wow.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
So yeah, she was on a
monitor and it was very scary
yeah, that's a lot to be putthrough, not like put through,
but like a lot to learn in ashort period of time yeah,
because pretty much whenever youhave a preemie, a nicky baby
like you, have to advocate forthem like you were their voice.
Speaker 3 (15:34):
Yeah, and I've never
had any experience in that
before and all of a sudden I hadto become a professional.
Speaker 2 (15:41):
Yeah, wow, um.
So how long did it take for herto wean off the oxygen?
Speaker 3 (15:52):
she was off the
oxygen within two weeks of being
home.
Oh, that's awesome.
I think it was like 14 days.
So, yeah, she was on like thelowest amount, so like our next
step was off.
So it wasn't anything major,but it was still scary.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Yeah, yeah, that's
two weeks of, yeah, having to
check everything and make sureit's all right.
And did she have, like, theoxygen monitor and everything?
Speaker 3 (16:24):
Yes, and I would not
wish that on my worst enemy.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
It was awful Did it
like go off at random times.
Speaker 3 (16:32):
Yes, like it didn't
even even like read correctly
half the time yeah, that wouldbe very anxiety inducing, for
sure, and only did it at nighttoo, of course, worked fine
during the day, yeah always yepum.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
How was your mental
health again being, you know
kind of being in charge of thatand taking care of her?
Speaker 3 (16:59):
I was more confident
doing it myself than like
letting you know grandma watchher for an hour, you know, or
something.
I was like I was very on top ofit.
Yeah, I was very on top of ityeah, yeah Was it hard to?
(17:24):
is it still hard to like leaveher like with a babysitter or
anything Sometimes?
But it's not like I don't knowmy anxiety.
I still have like the anxiety,but it's for different reasons.
Before it was because, like youknow, she needed the oxygen and
you know she had an oxygen tank.
But now it's more like hmm, didyou know, did so-and-so do this
while I was gone, not you know?
(17:44):
More or less like, herwell-being am I worried about?
Speaker 2 (17:47):
Yeah, yeah, so you
said that she's 16 months now.
How is everything going sincethen?
Speaker 3 (17:55):
Oh, it's going great.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
Now, good, she's
running terrorizing the living
room, Just like a 16-month-oldshould.
Oh yes.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
No, step back there,
yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
Did they give you
kind of any clarification?
Speaker 3 (18:19):
on what happened that
made your body go into labor so
early.
Nope, uh, still to this daythere is no known cause.
They said, sometimes it justhappened.
Uh, it happens to like one tothree percent of women, so it's
not common at all.
Yeah, but they said, um, likeif I were to ever get pregnant
again, I would be consideredhigh risk and I think I have
(18:40):
like a 30 chance of it happeningagain.
Oh wow, I'm blind.
I didn't know, but it couldactually happen at any point in
pregnancy.
Yeah, no, like that, I did notknow.
Yeah, yeah, definitely in chance, or increases the risk by 30
percent is that's wild yeah, Imean they told me, um, to wait
(19:04):
at least 18 months to try again,because I think under 18 months
, like your percentage, is like50 percent chance of it
happening again, looking backnow, what was the biggest
challenge that you had toovercome during all of it?
Probably just having a preemiein general, because I had her
(19:26):
right at.
I brought her home right at thebeginning of like RSV season
and not a lot of people knowthis preemies they don't have.
Like their lungs aren't as bigas like a full-term baby, so,
like if they get sick, like it'sa very high chance that like a
simple cold can like put them ona ventilator.
(19:46):
So the hardest thing for me wasprobably like navigating that
like with like my family and theholidays and choosing to stay
home and, like you know, notletting people like hold her and
come over.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
Yeah, that's tough,
that's really tough, and you're
only doing it because she can'tspeak up for herself, but then
it makes you look like the badguy and that's.
Speaker 3 (20:10):
That's a whole lot to
navigate yeah, I mean I got to
the point where, um her healthwas more important to me than
somebody else's feeling.
Yeah, yeah for sure love.
So I mean it sucked having todo it, but I don't regret it.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
Yeah, you made the
right choice.
Yeah, well, yeah, you had toprotect her right.
Speaker 3 (20:30):
You had to, like,
speak up for her, so that's
awesome you had to protect herright, you had to, like, speak
up for her.
So that's awesome, yeah, um,because she was diagnosed with
chronic lung disease, which iscommon in preemies.
Pretty much like it's likedamage from the oxygen therapy
she has that now.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
Yes, okay, what.
Speaker 3 (20:53):
There's like no way
to tell or like how it's getting
better.
It's just what the hospitalclarifies as chronic lung
disease is after they have touse oxygen after 36 weeks.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
Okay, gestation.
So does she have any breathingproblems or anything?
Now, not that.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
I noticed, yeah, but
like it does make her higher
risk for like asthma does she?
Speaker 2 (21:19):
you know, like
obviously she's 16 months old,
she's like probably runningaround or all of that like do
you have to like stop her atsome point, or is she?
Speaker 3 (21:28):
okay, no, no, she's
fine.
I think she's fine.
Yeah, and it's just more orless if she gets like sick.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
Yeah, okay, okay,
gotcha.
That makes sense.
So what advice would you giveto NICU moms or parents out
there?
Speaker 3 (21:46):
Hard as it is, take
care of yourself.
You cannot afford from an emptycup.
Speaker 1 (21:51):
Yeah, yeah.
How did you take care ofyourself during all that?
Speaker 3 (21:59):
I slept I ate, right,
I was on a pumping schedule so
I was pumping constantly andobviously whenever you're
pumping you're thirsty andyou're hungry.
So literally just basic care,yeah, yeah.
Literally just you know.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Basic care, yeah,
yeah, but it's hard to do
whenever you have a baby that'snot right beside you yeah, you
feel guilty for doing it yeah,yeah, were you like watching the
camera a lot when you'repumping?
Speaker 3 (22:29):
yeah, I watched the
camera a lot whenever I was
pumping.
It was hard for me to watch thecamera because I wanted to be
there, oh yeah.
So some people, you know,stared at it constantly Other
times where I'm like you knowwhat, I'm just going to get in
my car and drive there.
I mean, everybody handles itdifferently and nobody does it
the same.
I know that there are some momswho stay there with their
babies day in and day out andyou know, just because you don't
(22:59):
do that doesn't make you a badmom.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
You can go home and
take care of yourself too.
Other people have little onesat home and other obligations.
Yeah, it's definitely such awild ride because, like you're
not expecting it, like you'renot, you don't want to go back
to the hospital once you have ababy, you just want to be home.
But you know, um, it's just,it's a whole nother layer added
into it and no one, nothing, canprepare you to be a NICU parent
.
Speaker 3 (23:21):
so yeah, one of the
things that really helped me,
oddly, whenever I couldn't bethere, since I had so much at
home to get done.
Like I said, baby shower wasn'tdone, nursery wasn't done I
actually had a lot of joy, um,even just getting like the
nursery like ready for washingclothes, like it was, even
though I wasn't there and I wasdoing something.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
It kind of like got
my mind off of it and it was
something to look forward toyeah, yeah, like the, because
you probably missed all thenesting kind of you get in that
last trimester.
Speaker 3 (23:52):
Yeah nope, I didn't
get nesting, I didn't get the
newborn photos, maternity photos, wasn't pregnant.
My baby shower, yeah, yeah, soit was like it was a lot to cope
with, but I mean, I don't thinkI would change how I managed it
(24:13):
, yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
Yeah, it sounds like
you.
You know you took care ofyourself, like you said.
I love the advice that you saidof like you can't pour from an
empty cup.
You're so right.
I mean, you have to do whatmakes you happy as much as you
can.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
Yeah, and I mean it's
hard whenever you have a nicky
baby because you have so muchmore on your mind you know,
you're kind of the last personthat you think about for sure
yeah, and everybody takes careof themselves in different ways,
like, yeah, I would probablyhave been sleeping and catching
(24:55):
up on all the sleep that youlost too from and just healing
physically too.
You know, yeah, no, sometimesyou think, oh, like I didn't
tear, I didn't have a c-section.
There's still like an openwound in your uterus.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
That oh yeah, I was
told to wait a week to drive,
but I was driving before thatand I wish I would have waited.
I mean, there are some thingslike you know, like you just
don't think about, likeeverything goes on the back
burner because you're like I gotto get this done.
And healing goes on the backburner too sometimes.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Well, thank you so
much for coming on and sharing
your story of you and Scarlett,and I'm so happy that she is,
you know, a thriving toddler now.
She looked beautiful from whatI saw, thank you.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
Thank you so much.
Yeah, thank you.
I hope somebody else can youknow use this information and
you know, know, can relate.
I was going through the body,you know, six months ago,
whenever it was coming up on herbirthday, and I was like
there's nobody else that haslike a similar story to me.
So I'm just hoping thatsomebody can you know take some
(26:09):
of the information and relate toyeah, absolutely, that's so
important, important to justfind that community, which is
what we're striving to do.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
Thank you so much for
sharing.
Thank you for joining us onthis episode of the Golden Hour
Birth Podcast.
We hope you've enjoyed ourdiscussion and found it
insightful and beneficial.
Remember, the Golden Hour BirthPodcast is made possible by the
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(26:43):
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(27:03):
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Before we sign off, we'd liketo express our gratitude to our
incredible guests who joined ustoday.
We are honored that they trustus enough to be so open and
vulnerable.
We're grateful for their timeand willingness to share their
stories with us.
(27:23):
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We'll be back next week withanother exciting episode, so be
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Until then, stay golden andremember to take care of
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We'll catch you on the nextepisode of the Golden Hour Birth
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Bye.