Embracing Self-Worth: Reflections on Personal Value and Transformation, Day 14

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Unravel the layers of self-worth and transcend self-judgment in this intimate exploration of personal growth on day 14 of the Orgasmic Alchemy Portal to the Podcast. Join me on a journey inspired by a forgotten book by Nancy Levin, which ignited a conversation with myself about my financial dreams and the deep-rooted beliefs that have held me back. It’s a path filled with vulnerability, as I share my transformative experiences with an alchemical self-pleasure audio guide and an eye-opening ketamine session that allowed me to confront and embrace sub-personalities of unworthiness, leading to a profound shift in my perception of self.

Discover how a shamanic journey into the shadow self revealed a version of me that lacked structure, allowing me to nurture and rebuild my inherent strength and truth. This episode invites you to reflect on your own narrative of self-worth, as I share how I metaphorically removed the "un" from "unworthy," leaving behind pure worthiness. Engage with these stories of self-discovery and embrace the ongoing journey toward accepting one's innate value. It’s a heartfelt invitation to listen, reflect, and perhaps find a piece of your own story in the process.


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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey, lovey, it's day 15 of the Orgasmic Alchemy
Portal to the Erotic EvolutionPodcast, so tell me what has
your experience been like thusfar.
Did you get the free alchemicalself-pleasure audio guide in

(00:22):
the link below?
I hope so, so you can playalong, and if you have questions
coming up about your experience, about the whole thing in
general, please leave me acomment or send me a DM on
Instagram.
So I'm feeling the shift out ofthe healing of self-judgment at

(00:51):
least that big layer and intohealing self-worth incredibly

(01:11):
esoteric and like I can't.
I don't feel like there'ssomething to grasp onto at the
moment to heal this in the waythat I would like it to be
healed.
And it occurred to me I havethis book called I think it's
called worthy or it's calledworth or something, and it's
about money, as as I, you know,trying to read all the books
about money, um and I.
It popped back into my headwhen I was made aware that that

(01:33):
is the healing journey that I'mon in this segment here and
maybe on for the rest of my life, I don't know um, because I
imagine we could all feel moreand more and more and more
worthy all the time.
So, yeah, I realized that I hadthis book.

(01:54):
That seems amazing, and I didnot get very far into it,
probably because it was sotriggering Um, because it was so
triggering um, that I was justlike not right now, come back to
it later.
So I'll be coming back to itvery soon.
I think it's by Nancy Levin.
If you want to get in on that,um, I'm recommending it.

(02:18):
I've read like a chapter, um,but if it's, if it's super good,
I will let you know.
Uh, yeah, so I I was doing mylittle acoptic record reading
for myself and asking what iskeeping me from, um, manifesting

(02:38):
the success and, um, you know,financial success that I desire,
and my guide said that I don'tbelieve that I am worthy of the
work that I desire to do.

(02:59):
So I'm like, okay, cool, nowwhat?
Like I don't know.
It usually seems sandwichedmore linear to me when I know
what the thing to heal is, butthis is like like everything,
like your self-worth is youreverything, um, and so I did.

(03:23):
I did another little readingtoday and and it's you know,
it's about releasing the beliefsthat what I am is not enough.
So, um, looking forward to thatand however that happens, and
that is people preparing for newyear's eve, um, preparing their

(03:48):
, their firework readiness,something like that, um, yeah,
so after I, I got the firstsegment of information of that's
what needs to heal for me tomanifest what I desire in my
career.
Then I went and did ketaminewith a friend and it's a

(04:13):
beautiful substance.
It was it's very graceful andpleasurable healing in my
opinion.
And so in it you know, I'mlaying there with my headphones
on and my beautiful music and Iinvited forward the pieces

(04:36):
within me, the sub-personalitiesthat are the embodiments of
unworthiness.
And so I kind of just like opena door and was like everybody,
come on out to play, we're goingto have a dance party here, and
um, so a lot of them just kindof like worked themselves out, I

(04:59):
guess, because after a littlewhile it was three main ones,
these three sort of likecartoonish character looking
things, and um, I was guided totake off their hats, um, which
was the un of the worthy on.
So I took the un off the worthyso they could just be left in

(05:22):
their, in their truth, and theirworthiness just be left in
their, in their truth and theirworthiness.
And um, it felt really good.
And then, um, I came home andand I I felt really guided to do
another shamanic journey intomy um, into my underworld,

(05:42):
connecting with my shadow piecessimilarly, and um.
So I opened the door to thisunworthy piece of me and she
looked just like me, except shehad no bones, she was just jelly
.
And so I picked her up andloved her and brought her to my

(06:06):
healing temple and just heldspace for her so that she could,
of her own accord, grow herbones back and strengthen her
muscles and all the healing thatshe needed to come back to her
truth and her inherentworthiness.

(06:28):
And I am, you know, I think thatthis sort of work is incredibly
powerful and many years agowhen I, when spirit was like all
of this hideous sensations thatyou're feeling all day, every
day, that's shame I had no idea.

(06:50):
I just was like I'm an anxiousperson, I have terrible anxiety,
because that is the wordeveryone uses.
So I thought that's what it was, because no one had ever
explained to me what shame feltlike and so I didn't know that.
You know, every second, likethe second, I woke up, every day

(07:10):
, I was just engulfed in likeincapacitating shame for so much
of my life.
And when the spirit was likethat feeling is shame.
I was like, oh, feeling ashamed.

(07:33):
I was like, oh, okay, thank you, now that I know what it is, I
can heal this.
And I did.
I, I like, did a ton of healingwork, just like this, um, and I
ended up being violently ill fortwo weeks after that where I
just puked up shame, just, itwas so, um, it was so much

(08:01):
getting well, it was sohideously uncomfortable.
But after those two weeks I waslike, oh my God, I feel amazing
, like this is what it feelslike to be relaxed.
Wow, I never felt relaxed in mywhole life.
And after those two weeks ofpurging, physically, purging the

(08:22):
shame out of my body, out of mycells, um, I was just a whole
new person.
Um so that is what I'm intendingwith this.
And I was actually findingmyself right before I knew that

(08:43):
self-worth was the next thinghappening, um, when I was just
like God, helped me heal mydigestion, like help me heal
whatever I'm holding in herethat is causing me all this
distress, and, um, I was leaving.
I was leaving my friend's houseshe's a couple hours away and I

(09:06):
started vomiting in in my mouthjust like completely
unexpectedly.
Um, so that was a interestingnight.
I'm like, okay, straight to bed, I'm going to be as propped up
as I possibly can, um, but soback to back to self-worth.
Um, yeah, so that is, that isthe process.

(09:30):
That's where I'm at to please beshown my true self-worth, show

(09:53):
me my true self-worth, because Iknow that my true self-worth
and your true self-worth isinfinite and just inherently
glorious.
And if we can tune in, if wecan know and feel what that is,
we can live our lives completelydifferently and receive

(10:17):
completely differently, becausewe're worthy of receiving
whatever it is that we desire toreceive.
So I think I'll stop there andI'm sending you tons of love and

(10:41):
if you are looking to alchemizeyour personal self work with
some tantric energy and NLP andsomatic, shamanic healing work.
Talk to me, let's work together.
Let's get you on your path ofinherent, abundant self-worth
and see what a beautiful changesthat creates in your life and

(11:01):
your love life and your sex life.
So there's a link below.
You can book in to work with meor we can have a little chat
first about it if you want to.
So I will see you tomorrow.

Speaker 2 (11:13):
Lots of love.
Thanks for listening to thisepisode of the good, the bad and
the sexy.
I hope that it served you insome way and, if it did, please
reach out to me on Instagram atthe good, the bad and the sexy
and tell me about it.
Also, is there someone in yourlife who needs to get in on this
conversation?
I would love it if you wouldshare the show with them.
It's so much more fun to talkthrough these things together.

(11:35):
Remember to get your freefollow along.
Orgasmic alchemy self pleasureaudio guide in the show notes
below.
I look forward to connectingwith you again next time.
Ciao for now.