Navigating Love Addiction: Embracing Loneliness and Self-Discovery, Day 20

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What if the love you're seeking is actually an escape from facing your own fears?" Join me as I share a personal journey through the complex emotions of love addiction and the surprising realization that loneliness can be an addiction in itself. Through candid storytelling, I reveal how romantic relationships were once my way of avoiding career challenges and personal growth. Discover how I learned to hold space for myself, acknowledging these feelings while embracing the courage to pursue my true desires and ambitions without relying on someone else to fill the void.

This episode invites you to reframe your understanding of relationships and self-care. Explore the empowering journey of becoming the captain of your own ship—navigating the rocky waters of life with confidence and sovereignty. We discuss the importance of integrating conflicting parts of oneself and mastering your destiny by finding safety and validation within. By recognizing your own patterns, you too can break free from avoidant behaviors and embrace the life you truly want to lead. Listen in for a transformative conversation that challenges conventional beliefs about love and independence.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oh, fancy meeting you here.
Okay, so if you are playingalong on this orgasmic
alchemical journey, let me knowwhat your experience has been
like and if you're not, go inthe dialogue box below the
description and download yourfree alchemical self-pleasure

(00:23):
guide and let the pleasure washover you and transform what is
ready to transform in your life.
So I did not self-pleasureyesterday.
I completely forgot, because Iwas planning on coming home and

(00:45):
doing that and then leavingagain and I didn't go home
because it didn't seem likethere was enough time.
And then I woke up this morningand I was like, oh, what
happened?
So that will have to happentwice today.
Oh, no, um, so what is comingup?
Uh, I started writing thismorning about, like what do I

(01:08):
want to be talking about in thepodcast and like, let's start at
the beginning, right, um, andthe beginning in my mind was
love addiction, and so, as I waswriting a little bit about that
, I recalled recently that I Iwas having this moment in in one

(01:35):
morning where I was like, justso upset about being single,
upset about being single, and inmy head was like, if I had this
romantic partner, I wouldn't befeeling this way, and then it

(01:58):
was like I wouldn't have to dothese things that I am feeling
resistant about doing towards mycareer.
And that's insanity, right,like having a romantic partner
doesn't mean I don't have to dothe things that I have to do to

(02:19):
create the result I desire.
Create the result I desire, andI think that's what.
But that's what I had beendoing.
I had been using romanticrelationship as this avoidant
addiction thing.
I will pay attention to you andI will focus on you and I will

(02:42):
help you so that I don't have todo all the things in my life
that feel scary.
That will actually create thesuccess I desire.
So, even though I'm not in thator any relationship at the
moment, romantic relationship,right, we should, we should.

(03:03):
Romantic relationship, right,we should, we should, you know,
be more specific because you canbe in relationship with so many
different people and so manydifferent things.
So, in any case, semantics, um.
So I was recognizing that I wasstill using love addiction as as
an avoidancy tactic, with therebeing nobody there, and I

(03:31):
realized, as I was, as all ofthis was like sorting itself out
in my head, um, that it wasactually an addiction to
loneliness.
Right, I meant to actually makenoise there, but this cedar

(04:01):
allergy happening in Texas rightnow is, is it's having a large
effect on my body, um, so thesound didn't even come out.
That was funny.
That one didn't even come out,that was funny.
At least I'm breathing at themoment, so addicted to this,

(04:23):
want to be with someone, and Ithink that the understanding of
that, just the, the recognitionchanged it, shifted it.

(04:43):
And you know, if there holdingspace for that piece of myself,

(05:06):
I'm recognizing when that comesup, where I'm like, oh, if I had
the partner, then everythingwould be okay, um, and I
wouldn't have to do this vlog orwhatever.
And just being like, okay, Irecognize that that is present

(05:30):
for me right now and that's okay, that I feel that way and we're
going to go do the thing.
So, holding space for both whilethey integrate, while this
other piece of me is like oh,actually, it is safe for me to

(05:54):
have the career that I want.
It is safe for me to do theprojects that I want to do.
It is safe for me to be, youknow, I want to say like master
my own destiny, um.
But as I've been talking aboutthis acceptance for days now, I

(06:20):
guess I'm not entirely surethat's the right phrase to use.
So I'm, I don't know, maybe I'mat the wheel, I'm at the helm
of the ship and trying tonavigate it through the big

(06:41):
rocky waters, something to thateffect.
But in any case, knowing that Ican be in the sovereign place
that I would like to be, thatthat is safe, that it is safe to
take care of myself, it is safeto.
That's the thing.

(07:02):
Take care of myself.
I don't need to foster someoneelse's life so that they'll take
care of me.
It's interesting how I gobetween this hyper independence
and avoidant attachment and loveaddiction, codependency.

(07:24):
It's a real fun thing tonavigate.
So we'll talk lots more aboutall of that, but that's what's
coming up, and you know if youare at a place in your life
where you would like to starttransforming your own love,

(07:47):
addiction, codependency andtransforming your attachment
style to one of being secure.
I am here to support you inthat.
I know a lot of things about itand I would love to help you,
help yourself, and give you somemagical tantric, shamanic

(08:13):
energy healing, to let thedivine support you as well.
So that's that, and I will seeyou again tomorrow.

Speaker 2 (08:22):
Thanks for listening to this episode of the good, the
bad and the sexy.
I hope that it served you insome way and if it did, please
reach out to me on Instagram atthe good, the bad and the sexy
and tell me about it.
Also, is there someone in yourlife who needs to get in on this
conversation?
I would love it if you wouldshare the show with them.
It's so much more fun to talkthrough these things together.

(08:43):
Remember to get your freefollow along.
Orgasmic alchemy self-pleasureaudio guide in the show notes
below.
I look forward to connectingwith you again next time.
Ciao for now, you.