Grit, Leadership, & Owning Your Value: The Iron & Infrastructure Podcast Reshare

Episode Transcript
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Stefanie Couch (00:00):
You have to be able to say this is our standard
here and I will not compromiseon that, no matter how hard it
is for myself and others, butespecially for yourself.

Jacob Emery (00:10):
Everybody wants a trophy Stefanie, but nobody
wants to be on that trainingground day in and day out.
Everybody just wants to hold itup and nobody wants to put the
work in.
And that's why so few peoplehave a standard and that's why
so few people actually hold thattrophy up.
People actually hold thattrophy up.
What's that?
One thing that 5% or 20% of thetime that you get to spend
doing this thing and you thriveand it generates revenue, it
drives the business forward, butyou don't do enough of it.

(00:31):
How do I get that to be theonly thing I do?

I get up in the morning because I believe my
purpose on the earth is torevolutionize the industry that
I was born into, and I wantundeniable proof that I have
done that.
I want to be able to sit in myrocking chair and think like I
made this better than it wasbefore, with a team of people
who are better than they werebefore because of something we

(00:54):
did together, and I'm betterthan I was before.
Welcome to the Grit BlueprintPodcast.
I'm your host, stefanie Couch,and what you're about to hear is
a conversation I recorded as aguest on another podcast.
We're sharing it here to bringyou a fresh perspective on
building, leading and simplynavigating the real-world grit

(01:16):
it takes you to move forward,whether you're running a
business, building a career orfiguring out what's next.
I hope this episode gives yousomething new to think about and
something you can use today.
Let's dive in.

Welcome to another edition of the Iron and
Infrastructure Podcast.
Ladies and gentlemen, today wehave a special guest.
She is a unique individual inher own way.
If you didn't notice by theamazing looking pink hat, if you
, stefanie, just do a littleturnaround, show the people the
back of it.
Stefanie Couch obviously doesnot disappoint.

(01:52):
She shows up ready to go andshe is as authentic of a human
as they come.
Stefanie, I've had such anamazing time talking to you the
last couple months.
It has been great to meet you.
I am thrilled to have you onthe show today.
Stefanie, tell the people aboutyourself because you have so
many great accomplishments inlife already, from being an

(02:12):
opera singer to a speaker, thegrit blueprint, corporate life.
Stefanie, tell the people whoyou are.

Thank you so much for having me on the show.
I'm excited to be here.
I started in the lumberyardwith, honestly, being born.
My dad and my granddad and myfamily had had a lumberyard in
Atlanta for a long time, sincethe 60s, and it was a retail
lumberyard.
So sometimes you say lumberyard, people think like cutting down
trees.
But we bought trees already,cut down and sold them to
contractors and that's what myfamily did, and my other side of

(02:45):
the family was painters andgraders and so real construction
background and a lot ofentrepreneurs in my family.
So I grew up doing that, runningaround the lumberyard, loving
the business.
I think when I was, you know,five or six, I asked for cash
register for Christmas and I'veliterally just loved business my
whole life.
You know I wanted to sell GirlScout cookies.

(03:06):
I wanted to be the one that wonthe competition there.
Um, that's just been like me mywhole life.
So I knew very quickly growingup that I wanted to work in the
lumber business and so my dadstarted letting me go uh, real
young to run the cash registerand literally booting the old
men that were running the cashregister like hey, I'll take
this one, and they're like God,this kid, you know they were
always really nice about it andlet me help and do all that.

(03:29):
So from there I went to college.
I sang, like you said, I did alot of singing, classically
trained at college, which waspretty cool, and got to travel a
lot with that.
So it kind of paved my way.
Instead of being like thefootball school, like UGA, I
went to a place in Georgia thatthe thing the school did was
choir, which is super nerdy andalso really cool.

(03:51):
And then I graduated and wentright back to the lumberyard so
got a degree.
That was a teaching degree Iknew I was never going to use,
just wanted to get that piece ofpaper and went back and just
started working at thelumberyard with my dad and the
team.
And then about seven years later, we needed to move for my
husband's job and my dad wasready to sell and I just didn't

(04:11):
feel like it was the right placefor me to buy.
That's been a point ofcontention in my life, like did
I do the right thing there ornot?
I think I did, but I alsoquestioned it every day, you
know, because I could havecontinued that legacy.
But he sold in 2012.
And I had recently gotten a jobat a large distribution company
that was one of our customersor, I'm sorry, one of our
vendors, and so I went andstarted working there as a

(04:34):
salesperson and kind of workedmy way up through the ranks and
ended up helping them build avery large startup part of their
business in the door business.
So I'm a door nerd.
I love to sell millwork windows, doors, all that stuff.
It's one of my favorite productcategories and so that's kind
of how I got started.

So you are a builder in general, so you love
building, whether it beinfrastructure yourself, other
people, you solve problems.
You are keynote speaker, operasinger, construction worker.
I cannot think of a more uniquemix into an individual for

(05:16):
being in the constructionindustry.
Stefanie, you wear a pink hat,you're vocal, obviously because
you sang in the opera.
You have a very confidentpresence about yourself.
It's so unique whenever I getthe opportunity to meet
successful women in thisindustry because it's primarily
a male dominant industry and soseeing someone like yourself

(05:37):
that's came in from five yearsold and this cash register you
know that's how I kind of got mystart.
I have a video myself at fiveyears old, running a full-size
track co and my little feetcan't hit the floorboard I'm
barely able to reach the leverslike it's absolutely hilarious,
but we share a similar passionand you know the kind of that
starting point.
But then you morph into thisperson who you're, authentic.

(05:58):
You're you full transparency,authentic authenticity, and then
you really want to help otherpeople and you want to help them
in every way possible.
And it's unique how we come tosolve all these problems
throughout our own journey toget a desired outcome for us,
but then solving the problemactually becomes serving other
people to help solve theirproblems.

Yeah, Well, and I think you know Rory Vaden is
somebody that I like to listento.
He talks a lot about personalbranding and things.
You know Rory Vaden is somebodythat I like to listen to.
He talks a lot about personalbranding and things, but he says
that you're mostly uniquelyprepared to help the person that
you once were, and I think alot about what I'm doing.
So fast forward 10 years atcorporate.
I've helped them build thisvery large business from like

(06:38):
about 10 million to 200 millionum with a team of people.
Incredible experience for me togo start some greenfield
locations, like building doorsin a door shop that wasn't there
a year before.
And then we built it twice inTexas in the middle of COVID.
But I just got to a point whereI was like, okay, I need
something else, like I need todo something else, and I always

(06:59):
had this entrepreneurial spirit.
So I had a little five monthstint where I left that first
job, went to another job, gotfired.
That was a blip on the radar.
I really didn't like the joband so my husband and I decided
we're going to start our ownbusinesses.
We started some LLCs and wejust decided like, okay, we're
going to go do this thing all inlike both of us no job, no

(07:20):
health insurance, no, nothingand that was in 2022.
And we we started talking topeople that were basically the
person I used to be.
So my dad's lumberyard isreally where it started and it
took me a little while to kindof like put this together.
You know, like you, you just dothings right and you don't like
come out and look at what you'redoing or why you're doing or

(07:41):
like what your motivation is.
At the time, my motivation wasto pay my mortgage, because I
was going to be living in mymother-in-law's basement in
about a month or two.
If we didn't figure it out sowhich I actually really love my
mother-in-law that wouldn't havebeen the worst case scenario at
all, but I didn't want to loseeverything that I built.
But we had been, you know,thinking about it's just like
the golden handcuffs of this bigsalary and like the big, you

(08:03):
know safe thing.
It's hard, man, like it's hardto leave that.
Once you have that at a certainlevel, it's always hard to
start your own thing, but whenyou're coming out of something
that's pretty big, money-wiseand security-wise, it's hard to
leave it, but the universe madethat decision for me and so once
I had that happening, it's likeokay, what's next?

(08:26):
And we started thinking aboutwhat problem do we know is in
the industry?
Like we know the industry hasthis issue that we need to solve
and we know that we havesomething that we want to give
the industry.
We just don't know how.
So I knew training was aproblem.
I knew that marketing was aproblem.
Legacy businesses, like mydad's, like a lot of our

(08:49):
customers that I had when I wasat the lumberyard they ended up
needing marketing and help beingvisible, but they knew nothing
about that and didn't want toknow it.
Like marketing is kind of acuss word in our industry, like
it's not the kind of cuss word,the first thing you get rid of,
right?
It's like not even.
It's like well, man, we boughtsome shirts and we sponsored a

(09:09):
golf permit this year and it'slike that's okay, that's not
really what we're talking about,but cool.
So at the end of the day, it'slike this is how we're going to
do it.
That way and this way didn'twork, and so we've spent the
last two and a half three yearstrying to figure out what is the

(09:32):
real solution that people findvaluable, that our market wants,
and then we've just iteratedfrom there and built a team.
So we've got about a team oflike 10 to 12 people, some
contractors, some, you knowthey're working for us and our
company is called the GritBlueprint and we're really
helping businesses be visibleand grow in the construction
industry and related areas.

(09:54):
We work with some individualsthat are in related trades or
consultants or people like that,but mostly companies that are
like who I used to be, so Ifigured that out like a few
months ago.
I'm like, oh my God, like Iused to be, so I figured that
out a few months ago.
I'm like, oh my God, I'mhelping me.
12-year-old Stefanie, her dadhas this business.
I just feel that drive and Ithink when I have a really hard

(10:16):
day.
I think about that.
I'll try not to get emotionalwhen talking about it.
I think about what would havehappened if somebody would have
known what I know that couldhave helped this business and
had the technology that we have,that we can bring in, like my
dad's business would still beopen because I would have bought
it and I would have hadleadership training, mentoring,

(10:38):
all those things.
I would have known what to do orat least had somebody to just
help me.
You know, I really believe thatit happened for a reason,
because I'm supposed to do thisfor other people and I'm glad
that it happened the way it did.
But I want to help as manybusinesses as I can to continue
that legacy and grow the legacy,like not just have it be there,
but be there and thriving.

(10:59):
So that's why we're doing whatwe're doing.
I mean you know, I think that'swhat I was put on the earth to
do, really.

And so you just figured out something that 99.9%
of the people in the worldnever even think is possible.
Yeah, exactly, you found yourcalling your purpose, and the
Joker and Batman both have thesame exact backstory.

Yeah.

The Joker and Batman both have the same exact
backstory.
Yeah, and you think about acoward and a hero.
They normally have the sameexact circumstances, the
reaction and what they dobecause of that.
That creates the outcome forthem.
And becoming a hero or a cowardand I think about the same
thing.
You know, I want to create alegacy of excellence, not
because of myself, but becauseof the team at RR Pipeline, and
just, it's not about me.

(11:44):
It's about individual success,absolutely, but it's for team
significance.
It's about building a dreamteam.
It's like a dynasty you thinkof any great dynasty in the
world.
It's not going to last forever.
Everyone has an end date in abusiness and anything in life.
We all have the samedestination at the end of it.
Knowing that it doesn't lastforever takes away any

(12:07):
discrepancy on thinking thatyou're obligated to it.
Yep.
But when you come together withunity for a common goal to
achieve some level of greatnessand everybody's aligned and
everybody's fighting for thesame thing, it doesn't mean
you're going to be on the teamforever, it doesn't mean that
you're always going to win, itdoesn't mean it's actually going
to work, but when you do that,your chances of actually winning

(12:29):
, getting what you want out ofit, becomes so much higher.
And it's not about no oneindividual is bigger than a team
, and so knowing that ispowerful.

It's so fun to build a team.
It's hard, it's also reallyhard, I know.

for me it's.
It's about building up anddeveloping people that deserve
it, not the people that need it.
Yeah, so, knowing that there'sa lot of people that need
training myself included, youknow I am a freak about, I'm
obsessed with learning it'sprobably almost a detriment to
some extent because of theamount of time and obsession I
have.
But you have to develop thepeople that earned that

(13:08):
development, not the people thatactually need it, because
there's a fine.
There's a really big difference.
You know everybody needs it,but not everybody deserves it.

Yeah, and the hunger has to be there.
I think that's the thing.
So Ben and I Ben's my husband,um co-founder in the business
with me, and he's very oppositeof me, which has been really fun
to work with, someone who hasall of my my weaknesses and can
fill in the gaps there, andwe've been doing this together
since, like I said, 2022, andhe's really great at building

(13:38):
teams because he was in lawenforcement for a long time.
There's a certain amount of uh,you know, they talk about the
brotherhood, sisterhood of lawenforcement and and really at a
high level, doing hard thingstogether, and so he's, that's
his superpower.
Talk about Batman and Robin,like it's, that is his thing,
right, and so that's beensomething I've had to learn, um,

(13:59):
because I thought I knew whatthat meant when I was at
corporate and I did have a teamand I didn't know what it meant.
It was still a lot about me.
It was still like I can bruteforce this to work and then
they'll just figure it out andfollow in line, or either, like
I'll just drag them across thefinish line and that does work.
I mean it does.

(14:20):
You can lead with fear, you canlead with foot push, you can do
all that.
It will work to a certainextent, and then you will cap
out very quickly and they'llburn out and they'll leave and
everybody will hate you Well andyou know when everyone else
burns out.

you're sitting there carrying the weight by
yourself.

That's right.
The whole intent is to have theweight taken off of you so you
can evolve with everybody else.
Yeah, it feels great until youfigure out that your life is
hell because you've doneeverything yourself and there's
nowhere else for you to go.
You can't move up from that.
I think that's the thing.
When I have this big shift islike, okay, I am an excellent

(15:01):
individual contributor, I can dothe things, I can make the
things happen, and that feels sogreat.
And you get to a point you'relike, okay, I'm making this much
, I'm doing this much and I'mI'm there Like I could probably
move up, but incrementally, likevery small, right.
But if I figure out how tobottle that up and then use
other people's strengths that Isuck at, like my husband's a

(15:23):
great example, okay, then maybewe don't 2X that, we 5X it or
10X it.
Then if I can get 10 savagesthat are on a team that are like
we are going to go freaking, dothis Like I think about very
dramatically the movie 300,which is so funny to hear a girl
in a pink hat say that right,but I'm like let's go conquer

(15:44):
the world.
You know, that's how I feelwhen I get up in the morning.
But if 10 of us are screamingthat and running to the
battlefield every day, no matterwhat the battlefield is, it
doesn't matter if it really is abattlefield or it's like just
business.
If you have that type of energy, with 10 people like you,
conquer the world.

I mean, I don't know what you can't do.
Yeah, yeah, I love it.
I always reference the analogyof a draft force.
So one draft force by itselfcan pull 8,000 pounds, but two
draft forces that are unified insync and you know, pulling in
sync with that unity together,32,000 pounds, which is double

(16:24):
what you would think of beingwith two of them individually.
And you think about that.
That's exactly what leadershipis about, that's what unity is
about, and having that it's it'snot.
There are no shortcuts inbusiness, but, by God, there are
accelerators and knowing that,if I can get this person to
compliment my strengths andweaknesses, they strong in the

(16:44):
areas I'm weak.
What's possible?
Everything is possible at thatpoint, unless defied by physics
or law or a matter of fact thatit can't be done.
It's possible.

It's just figuring out how to get there
and the other thing that I'llsay to that is like when you
have motivation, that wanes andit will wane and you will have,
like you we were talking beforethis about getting kicked in the
teeth Like you're going to havedays and weeks and maybe months
that you just get kicked allthe time.
And if you're by yourself, likewho will pick you up?

(17:16):
You have to pick yourself up oryou have to have your own
motivation, which can happen,right.
But if you're with a team oreven just one person that has a
hard day and you have a good day, it balances like they'll pull
you along right, they'll keepyou going, and so that's the
thing I love about leadershipthat I didn't see coming and I

(17:37):
just wasn't self-aware enough tounderstand how valuable it was.
And I think that the higher youget in your business career,
the more you do, the more youlearn, the more you see.
And Dave Ramsey is somebody Ireally like.
He just came out with a newbook recently and he talks a lot
about leadership and you knowespecially people who are sales
inclined.
Like you think you can win byyourself, because you can't,

(18:01):
like you can.
You can make it happen, right.
Right, because you're bringingin revenue.
But at some point you got tofigure out like, oh man, this
game actually is a talent gameand this game is a leadership
game and if I'm good at sales,that will get me here, and if
I'm good at leadership, it willget us here.
And that is like something thatjust illuminated like a big

(18:22):
billboard to me about I don'tknow a a year and a half ago,
two years ago, and my husbandhelped me figure that out a lot.
He listens we both listen toJocko and stuff and all these
people it's like they're waysmarter, way richer, way more
successful than me are sayingtalent and leadership.
And I'm like cool, I got tofigure this out.

I haven't figured it out yet, but I'm trying every
day this out.
I haven't figured it out yet,but I'm trying every day.
And it's not a natural talentper se, it's the development of
the people on the team.
And so I have a coachingprogram now called Unlocking
Greatness, and I think I toldyou about it right before it
launched.
And you know, one of myleadership coaching sessions was
about the traffic lightleadership.
That's what I call it.

(19:01):
You think about terribleleadership.
It's a red light to me and it'sthe person that's cutthroat.
We're in the constructionindustry.
I don't have to explain it toyou, but for the people
listening it's cutthroat, it'sall about me.
How can I use you to get what Iwant?
And nobody cares about anybodyelse but themselves.
And it's probably the mostcommon in our industry.
It really is.
It's very, very common and it'sultimately the reason that a

(19:46):
lot of businesses in ourindustry you know, in
construction blue collarworkforce implode because you
for their own individual successand it scales them so far in
the workforce they become, youknow, mediocre leader maybe, but
they're out there really justto get their desired outcome,
but they will help other peopleto get themselves what they want
.
And then you have that greenlight, you have the
transformational leader and thatis the person who loves the
people that they lead.
They don't just lead thembecause they love to lead, they

(20:07):
love the people that they lead.
They are always about unity,about the abundance and
opportunity kind of culture, andyour leadership does determine
your culture.
You look at leadership.
It's a direct correlation toculture.
So what's your leader do everyday?
You know, are they preachingone thing and doing the opposite
?
If you show up every day andset a standard for yourself,

(20:28):
everybody sees it.
You can say a lot, but what youdo is what is seen and what's
captured.
And so if you're doing X andthen you say Y, nobody's going
to believe you.
They're going to sniff it outvery quick.
How you lead is ultimately howpeople follow you.
So if you're reluctant to buysomething or you don't think

(20:49):
you're worthy enough to investyourself in coaching, you're
probably not going to sell verywell.
How you buy is how youultimately sell, and I truly
believe that everything in life,what you focus on, expands and
what you give to the world, theworld gives back to you.
Thing in life, what you focuson expands and what you give to
the world, the world gives backto you.
If you're just a shitty personin general and you don't like to
help other people, if peopleare laying down and you won't
pick them up by God.

(21:11):
If you're laying down, don'texpect someone to put a hand out
to you because it's going to bereciprocated that way and
that's the thing in our industry.
That's why I love what you do,because you bring a presence to
yourself like hey, I lookdifferent, I am different.
Here I am, I'm Stefanie and I'ma badass.
Nice to meet you and let's godo this thing and win.
That in itself is an extremeconfident power that you have,

(21:37):
because it's not known in ourindustry in general.
Just blue-collar workforce, verytraditional.
I drink coffee until I drinkalcohol.
I got to chew or smoke in.
You know it.
I don't even have to go intothe depth side, but we know
exactly what it is and it's notthat they're bad people, but
it's it's just a status quo,that is, it's slowly dying and
that's why I think we have sucha unique shortage in workforce

(22:00):
compared to opportunity.

Yeah, it's, the opportunity here is huge.
You know, workforce compared toopportunity.
Yeah, it's, the opportunityhere is huge.
You know, for anyone that is ayounger person that wants to
like make it happen for them, Ican't think of a better industry
.
Honestly, whether it's buildingmaterials, which is kind of
more, you know like where I'mused to being not quite as rough
and tumble as like trueconstruction construction you
know that's the hard work andit's it takes a certain amount

(22:23):
of person to actually be outthere physically doing that
stuff, and so I think there's alot of myriad of opportunity in
our industry so you could be insales and never be on a physical
like track hoe, or you could beout there swinging a hammer or
an L gun or whatever.
You can kind of choose that andthen go all these different
places.
I mean there is so muchopportunity.
So I want to kind of hit onsomething you said that I think

(22:46):
is just really like hitting meand resonating with me right now
, because I talked to my teamabout this.
A lot is the word standards andyou know you think about like
what is your standard foryourself is how everything in
your business starts to theneither rise or fall to that
right and like habits is.
Is the not what you do, yourgoals, but it's the systems.

(23:07):
Well, systems and standards.
Because you've got this thingyou set.
And my team asked me we weretalking this week about a design
project we were doing and, um,I don't know, somebody sent
something back and it we hadthree options and they were all
contractors and they came backwith some logos and they weren't
bad.
They were just kind of likelackluster, honestly.
And I told my creative director.

(23:27):
I was like I don't know, likeit just doesn't, this is not,
it's not good enough yet.
And, um, it wasn't becausesomeone else designed it and I
didn't design it, cause I didn'treally have an answer either
for what it should there yet,and she agreed I was like you
know this?
And she said our, our standardstoo high?
And I said, hell, no, they'renot too high.
And I said and here's why,because I can tell you when I

(23:50):
see the thing, that and you andshe's got a great eye and she's
amazing Um, I said, when we seethe thing, that is the right
thing, we'll know that that'sthe standard and we know that on
other projects we that way.
A lot of times when she sendsme stuff I'm like I have no
notes and this just wasn't thereyet.
And so if you are willing tocompromise on your standards, on

(24:11):
something small like a logothat probably the client would
have still loved they thought itwould be awesome, but it wasn't
good enough, and there is alimit to that of like
perfectionism is not possible,but there is a standard.
And so we have high standardsas people you and I both uh, you
know what we do, what we'rewilling to compromise on all
those things.

(24:32):
And I think, with leadership,that actually is the most
important thing that I'verealized is you have to be able
to say this is our standard hereand I will not compromise on
that, no matter how hard it isfor myself and others, but
especially for yourself.
And so if you're going to havea standard that's super high,
then you have to know that toget there and stay there is

(24:53):
going to be really freaking hard.
Like it's not going to besomething that just is like
phoning in on a Tuesday.
You know four hour work weekneed not apply.
That book is kind of BS for 99%of businesses and 99% of people
especially in our industry.
Like, come on, but you read thatstuff and you hear these people
that are like, oh yeah, I hit amillion in like three days and

(25:14):
blah, blah, blah, blah.
It's like yeah, there'ssomewhere, somebody did that.
But most of the time these realbusinesses that will be here in
20 years, 30 years, they arehard.
That's why no one wants them,because it's hard to go out and
work on a grader every day.
It's hard to build a house inGeorgia and do roofing in summer
in the 150 degree heat.

(25:36):
It's hard to do what I'm doingand I'm not even outside, I'm in
the AC, but it's still hard todo it, and so that's like your
standard is what will keep youthere and it's what will help
you be the best.
But very few people are willingto be uncompromising on that,
and it still tests me most days.
But you've got to remember whyyou're doing it and so if you

(25:57):
have that purpose, um, I think alot about my dad and my
granddad, who had very highstandards and it's like I have
those standards and I'm notgoing to be the one to let
myself down and look back and belike, well shit, I took the
easy way out and now I'm notwhere I want to be because I
knew I was taking a shortcut.
You know, it's just.

I love this.
I love it.
Stefanie, you were hitting onsomething near and dear to my
heart, because I amnon-negotiable on my daily
standard, and you touched on somany things James Clear, atomic
Habits one of my favorite books,the first book that I would
ever recommend that and theCompound Effect for personal

(26:37):
development, because personaldevelopment starts with building
habits.
We don't rise to the level ofour goals, we fall to the level
of our systems.
And that is a quote from JamesClear and it is one of the most
profound and true statementsthat could ever be made.
Having goals on a poster andgoals that are aspirational are
great, but show me what yourschedule looks like, what's your

(26:58):
standard in life?
And so, for me, my standardsare the standards of greatness.
The standards of greatness areno snooze.
We don't hit the snooze button.
You start the day on yourschedule, so you set this thing
in place to make sure that youare doing what you're supposed
to do on your time the way thatyou need to.
It starts the day that way nosnooze.

(27:19):
Then it's physical output 10minutes minimum, but physical
output every day, and 10 minutesof intentional movement.
It doesn't have to be apowerlifting meet.
You don't have to go run amarathon, but 10 minutes of.
Maybe it's a walk when you wakeup, maybe it's yoga or anything
where you're intentionallymoving your body for getting
momentum in the right direction.

(27:39):
And then you have physicaloutput, then mental input.
If you collect garbage, you'regoing to put out garbage,
garbage in, garbage out.
So we want to collect quality10 minutes every day Because
that compound effect of thathabit being in place over time,
10 minutes a day becomes 60hours in a year.
60 hours in a year is a lot oftime.
And we're talking 10 minutes aday, which is a fraction of your

(28:01):
day.
And then you have to track andattack every day.
Track and attack.
You track your progress and youattack every day with the
intent behind.
What does your day look like?
I don't care if you're taking anap.
If you're taking a nap, attackthat nap like it's the best nap
you're ever going to have,because it's just about being
intentional with your attentionand focusing on the thing that

(28:21):
you're meant to do that day.
It's not half in, half out.
You're just being dedicated towhat you set out to do and it
doesn't have to be someaspirational thing.
It could be a recovery daywhere you're just focused on
disconnecting, completely Sure.
And then the last one isgratitude and preparation.
Every day you've got to endwith gratitude Win or learn.
We don't lose.
So every day is gratitude.

(28:42):
And then prepare for the nextday, because today's success
started last night and it's thesimple things.
Like you got your clothes outfor the day every every night,
stefanie.
I'm like, I'm like athree-year-old with this.
I have my clothes out for thegym.
I'm gonna close out for mybusiness day.
I know what my next day lookslike.
I know what my workout lookslike, my alarm set, I got a

(29:02):
gallon jug of aminos andeverything I need for the day,
ready to go.
There's zero thought processthat I have before 7 am and the
preparation.
If it's not in place, you'reset up to fail already.

Yeah, it's so true, especially when you're
really busy and you're operatingin the high level.
I know we you know we talked alittle bit about um and my
husband, ben like totallysubscribes to this is he pretty
much wears the same thing everyday, like a black t-shirt.
Um, he wears a Richardson 112hat and some days is front and
some days it's backwards, so hemixes it up some days.
But you know he wears chubbyshorts.

(29:38):
So he worked in law enforcementfor a long time.
He wore a uniform and a dutybelt and the Georgia heat with a
bulletproof vest on and sweatedhis guts off every day.
And it's like so he wants towear his chubbies in a black
shirt every day.
I don't give a shit what hewears.
He does whatever he needs to do.
He's working in his office,working on the business, and I
get to wear what I want.
So he subscribes to that and sohe doesn't really have to ask

(30:00):
his gym clothes are his workclothes.
He changes, so we have to washtwo sets of them because he's
sweaty, but they're the sameoutfit and I don't give a crap,
you know.
And so that's.
The thing is like how do youmake those decisions that don't
really matter in the scheme ofthings, they make those easy and
regimented so that then the bigthings that actually matter you
can have time to decide on.
That's really important, Ithink, the higher you get.

(30:22):
You know, I know a lot ofpeople have kids.
I don't have kids, but like yougot kids, you got a wife or a
husband or you knowextracurriculars, family stuff,
whatever's happening.
You want to be able to spendtime doing that stuff, not
worrying about little thingsthat don't matter.
You know we have startedordering.
Like a lot of times we'll eatlunch and dinner prep meals like
mega fit, fit meals, because Idon't want to have to cook and

(30:45):
do dishes like.
I would love to have timeeventually in my life that if I
wanted to do that, I could.
I used to like to bake, but Idon't have time in this season
of my life to do that, and soit's about prioritizing and I
think it is like what standardsdo you want to keep?
And then, what standards areyou willing to like?
Hey, you know what?
Maybe I don't have to do thisevery day, cause it doesn't

(31:06):
really drive anything.
I'm going to let that go, andsome of the things are easy to
let go, you know.

Yeah Well, I mean, what's the ROI on it?
So what's the return oninvestment in your life?
What do you want out of life,you know?
Just having clarity of whatyour life is going to look like
in five years or 10 years, right?
Or what the hell you evendesire to have tomorrow.

Yeah.

You know I often ask people perfect day scenario
Tomorrow you wake up with allthe financial means, the free
schedule, you never have to doanything again.
What do you do?
Yeah, A lot of people couldn'teven think about answering that
question.

I write that in my journal every single day.

I love it.
Perfect day scenario issomething that I'm just very
passionate about, because youknow, Stefanie, what's unique?
I would change some things onmy day to day, but a lot of what
I do I would still keep doing,and that's how I know I'm
starting to get that freedomthat I desire to have.
I would still wake up at 3 amand train with the group of guys
that I do.

Yeah.

I can't not do it because I know how it makes me
feel, because it's my standard,yeah, and so thinking about the
standards and what you do, itbecomes a lifestyle, like the
clothes thing I don't even thinkabout what I wear, and so it's
a thoughtless process where Idon't want to have to make
decisions on things that are notgoing to create value or
fulfillment in my life and it'sto each their own.

(32:20):
It doesn't mean that that's theright way or the wrong way for
everybody, but what yourproblems look like on a
day-to-day or what decisions aredraining you, ultimately become
your constraint in life.
Yeah, for sure, if you're intraffic and someone cuts you off
and you're just irate and gotroad rage and it ruins your day,
your problems aren't big enough.

(32:41):
Yeah, if you get a medium steakand it comes fully cooked, it's
like, oh, the steaks go in andruins your day.
Yeah, you need to have biggerproblems.

It's funny that you say that, because I think
the bigger our business gets,the more like.
I used I never had like thatkind of thing, but it was like
the little things would stressme out.
You know of like out, you knowof like, well, what are we going
to do here and what are wegoing to do here?
And I would have everythingplanned.
And now it's like okay, I'mliterally sitting in front of
this place that I'm supposed todo this thing.
Let me check my calendar andsee if I'm even the right place

(33:12):
I'm supposed to be.
Um, because I don't even reallyknow people like, where are you
going to be next week?
I'm like you know what?
I know that I'm going to be inSalt Lake City next week and the
week after that I'm going toMinneapolis, and any other
details.
I will have to check mycalendar, because I don't
remember and it doesn't reallymatter, I'll just get into the
airport and then look to seewhere I'm going to call the Uber

(33:32):
to go.

I'm so bad about that now.
My EA has absolutely saved mylife and changed my life,
because I always reference herbeing the COO of my life.
What do I got next week?
I'm not really sure.
Yeah, it'll probably be.
Whatever she tells me tomorrowor the end of the week.
I'll let you know when I getthere Exactly.
But that's the thing.
Like, I don't want to manage mycalendar, I don't want to

(33:55):
manage my schedule, I'm going tosay yes, that's whatnot, but
ultimately I don't want to clearmy inbox out.
That's something I suck at and Iprobably lost millions of
dollars in opportunity justbecause I didn't have timely
responses.
That's the last thing I want todo.

(34:15):
I hate it and I suck at it.
So why would I actually want todo it?
And it's just about figuringout what you're uniquely gifted
at.
I'm a strategic coach and wecall it unique ability.
What's that one thing?
That 5% or 20% of the time thatyou get to spend doing this
thing and you thrive and itgenerates revenue.
It drives the business forwardand it doesn't bog you down.
You love it and you are justgreat at it, and it's something

(34:37):
that you just desire to do allthe time but you don't do enough
of it, and that's what I think,what you would probably say
you're doing too.
How do I get that to be theonly thing I do?

Yeah, it's.
It's hard because you have tofind the right person to do the
other stuff and you're nevergoing to find you again.
So you know it's like, okay,well, that person's not as good.
That's usually not even true,honestly.
But at first you're like, well,they're not going to be able to
be as good at this thing.
You know, we both like DanMartell too, I think, about his

(35:06):
book Buy Back your Time a lot.
I just recently listened to itagain because it's like every
time I listen to it it hits meagain Like, oh yeah, you're
wasting a lot of time doing thisthing.
You should be paying someoneelse that's better at to do.
But I think about the thingsthat I like to do that I am
really good at, like sales, youknow, building businesses,
strategic vision, the creativestuff is so fun.
You know, like God, it's so funfor me to do that stuff and I

(35:28):
love it.
But eventually, if the businessgrows enough, I will have to
stop doing a lot of those things.
It's not the stuff you don'tlike, like the data spreadsheets
.
Pretty easy for me to outsourceaccounting.
It was the first thing I everdid.
I hate that, but the things youlove, they're harder to
delegate because you want tohold on to them and you feel
like you're the best.

(35:48):
But if you want to grow thebusiness enough, you're
eventually going to have to be,you know, the person that says,
okay, well, there is someoneelse that can do this, probably
better than me, and I need tohire them.

And the best part of so I'm in Dan Martell's
coaching program and it's aweekly group coaching call.
It has changed everything aboutmy life, stefanie.
I cannot speak highly enoughabout it.
And he talks about poor peoplespend their time to save money.
Rich people spend their moneyto save time.
He references buying a jet andso he has his own jet and this

(36:22):
is what he does with it.
And he said if it saves me$25,000 a a day, I will go, hop
on my jet and use it.
And it's not.
He's just not flying arounddicking off all day like going
on these luxury vacations.
He's doing six or sevenpodcasts.
He's going to this event.
He is the keynote speaker here,so he's very strategic about it
.
But his ability to scaleoperations and just the way he

(36:45):
views the world I have neverseen anything like it.
I mean that man can absolutelydemoralize you and pick you up
in the same breath and put youon this pedestal and give you
the empowerment to know thatyou're worthy of it.
It's simple scales, complexfails, the simple things.
We are creatures of distractionand so keep the main thing the

(37:08):
main thing and nothing elsematters.
This priority has to be fixedand everything else will fall.
Second to that, don't ask meabout my time, because it's a no
.
This is the only thing thatmatters, because if this doesn't
work I die.
And if you have that frame ofmind, sometimes when it's hard
it doesn't become hard, itbecomes clear and you get
clarity about it, and then youjust know what you got to go do.

(37:29):
And then you learn so much inthat journey to get to that
certain point.
But nobody wants to climb themountain, they just want the
view at the top.
And everybody wants a trophyStefanie, but nobody wants to be
on that training ground day inand day out.
Everybody just wants to hold itup and nobody wants to put the
work in.
And that's why so few peoplehave a standard and that's why

(37:49):
so few people actually hold thattrophy up in the end anyways.

But that also makes it easier for those who
are willing to endure the painto see like, hey, I will go
farther and harder and longerthan anyone else.
That's all you have to do,because the rest of the skills,
no one's going to be therecompeting against you, probably
at the end, because you're theonly one that's maybe committed
enough, stupid enough, I don'tknow.
All of the above to keep going,and so I think that's.

(38:17):
The thing I figured out is likeI'm not smarter than a lot of
people, I'm not richer, I'm notwhatever, I just work hard.
And someone told me, likeyou're the hardest worker, they,
they uh told me that the otherday, like you're the hardest
worker I know, and I was like,oh my God, such a compliment.
Like and it's not, but it's notworking hard.
Like it's not just that I wantto do the hard thing, that's the

(38:37):
, whatever it is, it's hopefullyworking on the hardest working
thing, on the best thing.
That's my elite, like gift inthe world, right, so it's
figuring out it's not just aboutworking hard.
Is working hard on the zone ofgenius that's Stefanie couch or,
you know, that's Jacob orwhoever else it is.
That's if you can do both.
That's where it really startsto get dangerous and I didn't

(39:00):
know that for a long time.
I finally figured out aboutfour years ago.
You know, I'm aCliftonStrengths coach and I did
that because I figured out mystrengths and then I was like oh
, this is why I'm not like allthese other people.
It's not just the pink hat, Ithink this is pre-pink hat.
I was still pretty weird.
I mean, I always wore a lot ofcolors and floral prints.

(39:21):
It didn't quite fit in with thegolf polos and khakis and you
know driving moccasins.
But that part I was like, okay,here's the deal I lead with
influencing.
Oh, okay, that's why I don'tcare as much about the
spreadsheets as I do like allthese other things.
And this is why I want to dopublic speaking and why I'm
driven to do these things thatother people are like why are

(39:43):
you such a show off?
Why do you always want to be onstage?
It's like, well, I don't know.
I mean, I'm a songbird.
God gave me that gift.
Like, is there a reason thatyou want me to not use my voice,
that I was given to probablyuse my voice.

Right.

And then finally , you're like well, the person
who has the duct tape thatdoesn't want me to use it.
I will just get away from youand not give a shit what you
think, and I will still use myvoice.
And so once you kind of figureout what your strength is, what
you're here for, and that you'regoing to do it no matter what
anybody else thinks like that'spretty fricking powerful.
It takes a while to get there.

It does, because hearing the perception from
other people, then realizingthat you can go on a weight loss
journey, you know if you're 400pounds you lose 100 pounds
everybody's going to see thatshit.
They know that dude lost someweight, put the work in, but
internal growth is invisible.
Internal growth isn't oftenrecognized and the worst part

(40:43):
about it, and the mostdemoralizing part, as you grow
internally and you realize it,the people that are closest to
you don't see it.
They see you still as theperson you used to be.
Yeah, they don't recognize thenew you.
So when you meet someone new,it's like they just said some
really profound shit to me.
That I don't think is true,because it's the environment of
people that you've had aroundyou for so long that don't even

(41:05):
recognize your own growth and itbecomes like this mild
expectation that this is justwho you are, but ultimately it's
just you thriving in anenvironment of people that are
dragging you down.
And then you just startrealizing, like you know what I
don't believe what that person'ssaying is true to me.
I think I am better than that,or I am different, or I have put
the work in to know withconfidence I am this person and

(41:28):
just recognize your own value.
It's hard because there's afine line between arrogance and
confidence, but I always breakit down to this simple thing for
me, it's confidence is speakingin terms of you know who you
are, with proof that you haveaccomplished that thing.
Arrogance is you saying that Iam this person but have never
accomplished it, that you desireto be that person.

(41:48):
We desire things in life but wedon't deserve anything we don't
have.
You have to put in the time toearn the thing to deserve it.
If you don't have it, you don'tdeserve it.
And that, to me, is just asimple fact of life.
Because saying that you aresomebody that you're not, show
me your homework.
I always say that.

(42:12):
Show me your homework.
If you say this thing isfactual, show me the proof that
you have, show me the breakdownof this homework that you have
to be so confident in that.
If you don't have the homework,if you don't have the
documentation to show me with amatter of fact that this is the
reality, I want someverification there to trust all
the way.

Yeah, and I think that's why you get up in
the morning, right?
Is that undeniable proof?
But not.
I mean, it is obviously to theworld.
But I'm getting up in themorning and I'm working my ass
off to get better every day andto grow this business and to be
a better leader and to do allthe things, and I want to
revolutionize the buildingindustry.
I get up in the morning becauseI believe my purpose on the

(42:48):
earth is to revolutionize theindustry that I was born into
into the next generation, and Iwant undeniable proof that I
have done that to myself, not toanyone else to myself.
It will never be enough.
For me I've figured that out aswell because of some of my
strengths, like significance.
It'll never be enough.

(43:09):
I'll always want the next thingand that's okay.
I'm okay with knowing that.
But I want to be able to sit inmy rocking chair and think like
I made this better than it wasbefore, with a team of people
who are better than they werebefore because of something we
did together, and I'm betterthan I was before.
And hopefully I have a lot ofmini cows and howling and

(43:29):
animals around me too, becausethat's on my wants list too.
Like you think about yourperfect day.
There's a lot of freaking furryanimals around a lot, and then
my husband's like who the hell'sgoing to take care of these?
I was like what are you goingto do with all your spare time?
You're going to take care ofmany hound cows it's pretty
simple and golden retrievers.
I mean, what else could youwant in life?

Well, for me, I don't want any of that.
So that's all you.
I'll send them all your way.

You can have all of them, I keep waiting for
someone to send me a real minihound cow, because they send me
stickers.
They send me like all thethings like they're only $12,000
.
What are they waiting on?
I don't understand, and Ben'slike, what they did that.
Where would you put it?
We live in a townhouse.
Right now I'm like on the backdeck.
There's a really simple answerto this.

So I'll have to send you a picture of it.
I have a skull of a Highlandcow that a friend of mine
actually raised a couple hoursSouth of where I live in
Southern Ohio, and I actuallyhave, um, a coat off one too, so
a hide off of one that waspreserved and it's it's pretty
sweet.

I'll send it to you, um well, they're pretty
cute and I only want like fiveor six of them.
And you know so many donkeys,like I watched the Martha
Stewart documentary, um, and shehas donkeys and like all these
things, like minus the going tojail part and maybe not being as
nice sometimes.
Yeah, that's kind of it, rightlike parts of Martha Stewart's

(44:51):
life, parts of, like you know,some other people's lives little
Warren Buffett mixed in, I'd becool with that it's just about
doing you, though, right back tothe authenticity.

It's about defining your own success, getting that
thing, and then, if nobody elselikes it, so what?
There's only one dream that canbe lived out for every human in
the world, and it's the onethat they want or it's the one
that someone else has for them,and you have to make a choice,
and there's a fine line or afine point in time where
everybody might have the bestintent for you, but it doesn't

(45:24):
mean that's what's best for you.
And knowing that, okay, I canonly live one dream, and I have
to pick mine or someone else'sfor me.
Why the hell would you liveanybody else's dream for
yourself?
You have to live your own dream.
Be courageous enough to knowthat I am worthy to accomplish
this thing or to live life on myterms.
I have the best intent forother people too, but it doesn't

(45:46):
mean my thought for them iswhat's actually best for them.
Yeah, so live life on yourterms.
Chase your own dream.
We all have fingers right.
We all have fingerprints.
That's what your dream is like.
It's unique and it's only yours.
Nobody else can actually seewhat your dream is, so you got
to go get it and you've got tomake it a reality.
And I think the most epicfailure in life would be for

(46:08):
myself to be on my deathbed oneday and just think you know what
.
I should have taken that chance, or I should have done this or
I should have done that.
I lived life on someone else'sterms, not my own.
That is catastrophic failure atthe finest to me, because I'm
going to live life on my terms.
I catastrophic failure at thefinest to me because I'm going
to live life on my terms.
I'm going to pull up greatpeople that want to go along
this journey with me and I'mgoing to help everyone I can and
serve them along the way.

(46:29):
But, man, I'm going to live outmy own dream first, and that is
power at the finest, I think.

Yeah, we got to be all in on what we want in
life and what we are put here todo.
You know, I think once youfigure that out, you're like
okay, I mean, what's the pointof doing it half-ass you got to
go all in.

I want to.
I want to transition to closingout with this pursuit 151.
It's my, my motto in life,whenever committing to something
, whenever it's a new endeavor.
When I started this podcaststefanie I don't know if you
realize this or not I'm not avery good speaker and when I
started this it was one of thebiggest weaknesses of my entire
life and fears.

(47:09):
And Pursuit 151, it's verysimple 100% commitment, 51%
confidence.
I was 100% committed to thisthing for a bigger vision for my
life and for the team that Iwant to build.
But confidence was not thestrongest, it was at least 51%,
and I realized that we have tojust be committed for the

(47:31):
outcome, to ever have a chanceof seeing that outcome be real.
But confidence comes as westart doing the thing and commit
to never quitting on it and notletting failure set in and not
deviating from the path.
We have to commit a hundredpercent, but confidence grows as
you commit, and confidence of51% told me that I know enough

(47:51):
to be dangerous and ask theright questions.
I have people around me thatwill help guide me to that
ultimate dream, but I'm not verygood at this and that's just a
reality that I have to face, butI'm 51% confident that I can
get the desired outcome.
So pursue 151, 100% commitment,51% confidence.
That has been a driving forcefor me in so many scenarios now,
because knowing that you're notthat confident but you're at

(48:14):
least 51%, for me it's all Ineed to know that I'm willing to
pursue this thing if I'm 100%committed.

I love that.
Yeah, usually ask myself what'sthe worst that can happen.
You know, like what wouldhappen if I did this and it was
a complete, miserable, utterfailure.
Would I die?
And if the answer is no, that Icould, you know, live through
it.
I would go another day.
Then I'm better just go do it,you know and.
I think that doesn't mean takinglike unnecessary risks that are

(48:43):
just played out stupid, butlike you don't jump off the
cliff without a parachute, butthen again, if the cliff is only
six inches off the ground, whatreally is the risk?
So at the end of the day, like,what do you know about the
situation?
And I think Colin Powell has arule that I like, it's 40-70
principle.
So if you're 41 sure or youknow 70% sure in that little

(49:05):
range, that's the window to jump, and I've tried to do that as
much as I can.
But really just asking yourself, like what would happen if I
did this?
And it was an epic failure.
The answer is I could live on.
I'm going for it.

Every failure in life besides death is
psychological.

Yeah.

Every single one, because it's just our perception
of that failure.
If it doesn't kill us, it'swhat we think about it.
That is ultimately failureAbsolutely, and that's why win
or learn.
Never lose.
I love it Awesome.
Never losing because you'relosing is accepting failure,
it's accepting loss, it'saccepting this thing that is
perceived, but when in reality,it's a learning lesson, you

(49:46):
perceive it that way.
That's what it becomes, and soyou know.
One other thing I want to I wantto mention as we close out.
There's a sequence in life thatwe just we don't build this
empire on a sand foundation.
Sequencing equals success.
We have to take the steps andput the work in at the lower
level to build the foundation,become the person that
ultimately has an empire built,and if you're just building a

(50:09):
constant sand foundation andexpecting to build this big
building on it, it's going tocrumble before it even gets all
the way up.
So there is an order in lifewhere you just have to become
the best version of you, figureout who you want to become later
in life.
You can't start, though, withthe sand foundation and never
evolve from that.
So, just knowing thatsequencing equals success, you

(50:34):
have to put the time and effortand energy in.
There are no shortcuts, butfinding the accelerators in life
, I think, is ultimately whatdrives the difference between
success and burnout.

Sure, I love that.
Yeah, I mean, like you said no,no shortcuts, but accelerators
is a great way to put it is youcan do things to steal people's
uh, 10 000 hours, as they say.
Like alex ramosi says, you cando stuff that will give you a
gain that you couldn't haveprobably ever gotten in a short
period of time unless you knewsomeone that had done that, that
had been to the battle.

(50:59):
You know you need a sherpa.
If you can find one, it'd be alot easier to climb Everest with
one than without one.

Action doesn't equal accomplishment.
Look at a hamster wheel and thehamster on it.
They're just going in the samething.
They're working really damnhard, stefanie, but I promise
you they're not getting adifferent outcome.

Yeah, hard work alone is not enough.

No, if you're not getting smarter with the hard
work, then you're just doingthat hamster wheel thing and I
think that's a leading indicatorin our industry of misery and
burnout.

Yeah, for sure.
Like you said, a lot ofdrinking goes on at night
because people are miserable intheir existence and they don't
know how to get out or off thehamster wheel.
So I think it's important toknow where you're driving
towards and how to find thepeople that can help you get to
what you want to do.
It always goes back to the who,so I think it's important.

Yeah, if you don't know where you're going in life,
any road will absolutely getyou there, and that is the thing
about it.
Having just clarity ofdirection is so important.
Stefanie, you obviously haveclarity of direction.
I cannot thank you enough foryour time.
I'm going to give you the floorto close out the show.
Tell the people where they canfind you at and what your social
media links are, what you'reabout, anything that you want to

(52:10):
promote or whatever you got.
Just throw it out there.
It's yours.

So the easiest place to find me is probably my
LinkedIn, stefanie Couch, andit's Stefanie with an F instead
of a PH and I'll be wearing apink hat so I'm easy to spot.
And then I do a lot of speakingat industry conferences and
things like that.
So, like, if you're out andabout in the construction world
and you see me, please, please,give me a shout out.
But LinkedIn and I have aYouTube and a podcast, but I'm

(52:34):
out there.
So Grit Blueprint is my company, and if you are looking to grow
or be more visible and figureout how to get to be seen and
then known and chosen, andyou're in the construction or
building industry, I would loveto chat with you if you think it
might be a good fit and yourpodcast is called the grit
blueprint that's right I guessyeah yep, and jacob was on it.

(52:55):
His episode is coming out soon,so we're we're exchanging
podcast uh spots here and I loveit, so thank you for having me
on.
It was was a great conversation, as usual.
I love talking to you.

Stefanie, it's always a great time, so many
great things that you have putout there and so many great
things you've accomplished andfor what you've done in this
type of industry is absolutelysomething to be proud of, so
something that deserves theutmost recognition, and I'm
absolutely humbled that you cameon the show today.
So appreciate your time onceagain.

(53:25):
This has been absolutelyawesome.

Thank you.
That's it for this episode ofthe Grit Blueprint podcast.
For more tools, training andindustry content, make sure to
subscribe here and follow me onLinkedIn and other social media
platforms To find out more abouthow Grit Blueprint can help you
grow your business.

(53:48):
Check us out at our website,gritblueprintcom.

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