What kids learn from dad that they might not get from mom - Brent Dowlen

Brent Dowlen is a father, men’s development coach, and host of The Fallible Man Podcast. He’s worked with dads who want to show up better — but aren’t sure where they fit in their family’s day-to-day life.

In this conversation, we talk about the real, quiet power of dads: how they build courage, calm storms, and help neurodivergent kids believe in themselves.

We discuss how dads can:

• Be present early on (even in the NICU)

• Become calm anchors during meltdowns

• Reframe their “protector” instinct to connect instead of control

Brent shares stories from his own life and from families he’s walked alongside — including how he built a two-story sensory playground in his living room when his daughter was small.

Claudie unpacks what’s happening in the brain when kids feel safe — and explains how voice tone, posture, and even head tilt change how communication is processed. Her reflections reveal how early sensory memories shape our relationship with both mom and dad.

Episode Highlights

00:00 – “Welcome to Season 2…” — Start of the episode

10:10 – “When dad says, ‘You’re fine,’ kids believe it. Dads bring safety, not just protection — belief.”

26:09 – Brent shares how his brother helped his daughter with sensory overload in math: “He boxed out everything else with paper, one problem at a time.”

29:26 – “If dads can manage their own emotions, they can project that calm into their child. I’ve seen it again and again.”

32:46 – The story of Andy: “He de-escalates a whole house of neurodivergent kids like gravity pulling chaos down.”

44:05 – How dads can find their role: “You just start. Change the diaper. Take the 3am bottle. Once you show you won’t break the baby, it all opens up.”

52:56 – The sensory playground story: “I built a two-story indoor playground so my toddler could play safely while my wife rested. It had textures, wheels, padded carpet — everything.”

56:56 – Brent’s closer: “Start with your partner, then evolve toward the child. Lean into your strengths. That’s how dads find their place.”