The Leadership Language: How to Communicate for Influence, Trust, and Success

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Ever wonder why some leaders instantly command respect while others struggle to get their message across? The secret lies not in what they say, but how they communicate it.

Communication represents the fundamental difference between leadership that merely directs and leadership that transforms. In this thought-provoking episode, Dr. Paul Gavoni and AJ Rinaldi unpack the five critical dimensions of leadership communication that drive organizational success: reinforcing for production, resolving for partnership, reciting for inspiration, reflecting for authenticity, and receiving for understanding.

The conversation reveals surprising insights about the science of human behavior, including the optimal 4:1 ratio of positive to corrective feedback and why our natural tendency to focus on problems actually undermines our leadership effectiveness. Both hosts candidly share their personal struggles with public speaking—once their greatest fear—and how they transformed this weakness into a strength through deliberate practice and mindset shifts.

Perhaps most powerfully, they challenge the common assumption that communication flows primarily downward in organizations. "When was the last time you directed positive feedback up the chain?" Dr. Gavoni asks, highlighting how true communication creates a culture of mutual respect that flows in all directions. Through practical examples, compelling research, and memorable stories, this episode provides a comprehensive framework for communication that builds trust, resolves conflict, and inspires exceptional performance.

Whether you're leading a small team or an entire organization, these evidence-based communication strategies will help you move beyond good intentions to create lasting impact. After all, as the hosts remind us, leadership isn't about title or intent—it's about impact.

Link to Respect is a 2-Way Street Article

Pick up a copy of the #1 bestseller: Adaptive Intelligence: The Evolution of Emotional Intelligence Through the Proven Power of Behavior Science

The Behavioral Toolbox  equips those charged with supporting behavior change in schools with practical applications of the science of human behavior for making a positive difference in the workplace. In this case, the classroom and school!

Be sure to subscribe to Dr. Paulie's Heart & Science YouTube channel for a variety of content related to behavior science and bringing out the best in yourself and others. 

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
Welcome to the Heart and Science of Leadership, where
evidence meets empathy.
Co-hosted by Dr Paul Gavone, aWall Street Journal and USA
Today bestselling author, and AJRinaldi, a John Maxwell Team
certified leadership coach, thispodcast blends the human side
of leadership withevidence-based practices,
demonstrating that leadershipisn't about title or intent.

(00:24):
It's about impact.
And now here are your hosts,pauly and AJ.

Speaker 2 (00:32):
All right, welcome back, man.
Good to see you again, AJ, howyou been.

Speaker 3 (00:36):
I'm good brother.
How are you?

Speaker 2 (00:39):
Man, I'm always grinding man.
Got lots of stuff on theschedule, got some upcoming
talks, which I really love.
I'm constantly in my passionwith disseminating the science
of human behavior, man,especially as it as it involves
leadership.
You know it's something thatyou know.

Speaker 3 (00:54):
I know you and I are both extremely passionate about
absolutely, absolutely, and Ithink we got a great uh, a great
show on the books today for ourlisteners.
So so today is all aboutcommunication.

Speaker 2 (01:07):
I see that man.
You know, what our listenersdon't know is that AJ will come
up with the topic.
I like to shoot from the hip,man, but AJ puts together these
topics and he's got these namingtitles right.
We're going to be talking about, like, reinforcing, resolving,
reciting, reflecting, receiving.
I love it so much and you know,pax, you do a really good job

(01:28):
with that and I've got to thinkabout this stuff.
You know, again, I'm shootingfrom the hip.
I love that you just come outhere and you put these questions
out there and I'd love just topull from my brain, man, to see.
You know, hey, how are we goingto approach this stuff?
So well done on this.

Speaker 3 (01:43):
Oh, I appreciate that , brother.
And today is aboutcommunication, and we know that
communication is absolutely acritical component to leadership
.
As a matter of fact, if youshow me a leader that can't
communicate effectively, I'mgoing to show you an ineffective
leader of leader, and so,according to the Harvard

(02:07):
Business Review, paulie, thenumber one criteria remains for
advancement and promotion ofprofessionals is an ability to
communicate effectively, and soit's no secret that
communication is perhaps themost important skill a leader
can own.
So today we're going to unpackthat.
Today we're going to talk aboutwhy do so many people get it
wrong?
And also, paulie, what can wedo to improve our communication?

Speaker 2 (02:31):
Oh yeah, man, Wow, this is a bundle.
I mean, there's so much to sayabout communication, simple word
, but this is some deep stuffbecause just about almost all
the problems that I've seen inorganizations have revolved
around the single concept.
So I love this man that we'regoing to unpack this stuff.
So I know we're going to talkabout, I guess.

(02:55):
Just we're going to look at itfrom some different angles here,
so this is exciting.

Speaker 3 (03:00):
Yeah, and so let's talk about, kind of, our first
prompt of using ourcommunication in a reinforcing
manner.
And so that means how do we useour communication to bring the
best out of our team, whichultimately leads to more
production for our team, right,paul?

Speaker 2 (03:19):
Well, you know, I got a lot to say about this brother
, but I'm going to ask youwhat's your philosophy in this
area?
What do you think I got a lotto say about this brother, but
I'm going to ask you what's yourphilosophy in this area?

Speaker 3 (03:29):
What do you think?
Yeah, so one phenomenal bookthat has come out in the last
couple of years by John CMaxwell is Maxwell 16 laws of
communication, and in that bookhe says something that I really
liked, paulie.
He says that what youappreciate, appreciates and what
you depreciate, depreciate.
So, in terms of positivefeedback, giving positive

(03:51):
feedback to the people that welead, we know that positive
feedback nourishes people, itgrows people, and we never want
to be really free flowing andgiving of our positive feedback
to reinforce those values andthose performances that we find

(04:12):
effect of.
Paulie, don't you think?

Speaker 2 (04:15):
A hundred percent, brother.
A hundred percent, you know.
You know, here's what we knowfrom the science.
All behavior occurs becauseit's reinforced, period, end of
story, unless it's a reflex.
That's why our behavior occurs.
A lot of people don't understandwhat reinforcement actually is.
Reinforcement is something thatoccurs in the environment as a

(04:36):
result of our behavior, and ifit maintains our behavior, it's
reinforcement.
If it doesn't maintain ourbehavior, strengthen it or
increase it, it's not areinforcement.
It might be a well-intended youknow hey, great job, or you
tried to reward some behaviorbut if it doesn't strengthen or
increase the likelihood ofbehaviors going to occur, it's

(04:57):
not actually a reinforcer.
So it's important for everybodyto understand that Everything
we do is to get something or getaway from something, and in
organizations, uh, or in ourpersonal life, we have like
values, and values are like ourpreferred ways of being and
doing.
Essentially, they're sayinglike what are our potential
reinforcers?
You know we value goodleadership, right?

(05:19):
Uh, aj, that's something that'simportant to us.
And, um, when we engage inbehaviors and we see people are
performing better, that they'rehappier, that they, it's a want
to do culture.
You know, just seeing thatchange in the environment can
become a reinforcer to ourbehavior, so we continue to do
that thing.
What we know about positivereinforcement is that's the only

(05:40):
way to get people to go aboveand beyond, even when you're not
looking.
Positive just means something'sadded as a result of your
behavior.
Uh, in contrast, when peopleuse in terms of performance
improvement, when people usenegative reinforcement which,
again, when it comes performance, it's fear of consequences when
you pull out the whip on people, so you need to do this, people

(06:00):
will do just enough to get by,and only when you're looking.
And I think I use this analogymaybe in episode one or maybe
not, but it's why we do thespeed limit, for example.
We do the speed limit so we canavoid a ticket.
We do just enough to get by,and only when the cop is looking
.
So it's important to understandthat, because when we do use
leaders, managers, whoever willuse this approach because they

(06:23):
see it works, their behavior isreinforced for doing it.
You know you guys got to dothis stuff now and people hop to
you and they do it.
The problem is with the overuseand misuse of it that it can
drop morale and it can dropperformance in other areas and
et cetera, et cetera.
So I know that's what we'regoing to move into next with
this for resolving, but wereally want to focus on positive
reinforcement, that is,planning for the consequences
that occur following a behavior,and a lot of people miss this

(06:47):
piece, man.

Speaker 3 (06:49):
Oh yeah, absolutely.
And Paulie, in terms of kind oflike, is there like a ratio
that we want to try to establishas far as being intentional and
deliberate with that positivefeedback, to reinforce those
behaviors, just from more of ahuman behavioral science
approach?

Speaker 2 (07:08):
Yeah, the rule of thumb man.
Good question is a four to oneratio, that is, recognizing
appropriate behavior,appropriate performance four
times more than you have tocorrect it, and a lot of people
will want to come in and it'seasy to see the things in the
environment that are going wrongand that pulls our attention to

(07:29):
it, right, uh, it's in our dnawhere we look for signs of damn
or signs of danger, so itincreases this fight, flight,
freeze or fawn response in us.
Um, but good leadersintentionally search for growth
so that they can reinforce it.
And if you're not reinforcingat a four to one ratio, it might

(07:49):
mean you've set your goals toohigh.
People, right, so we got tomight need to bring them down a
little bit and break them downin the accomplishments so we can
recognize incremental growth,which we call shaping.
It's like shaping a piece ofclay into the perfect statue,
right?
So this is, this is really themindset that good leaders have,
and when you do that, when youwalk out and you're around
people, you become a positivestimulus to them.

(08:11):
People want to see you becauseyou've recognized what they're
doing growth and you haven'tdone it in a way that says you
did a great job but right, thebig but is like a great eraser
for anything positive thatyou've seen.
Or a lot of times people, justin the interest of time, they,
they, they use like a sandwichmethod you know you did a great
job, but blah, blah, blah.
But you're doing good over here, right, and kind of pairing

(08:32):
those negatives with thepositives can completely erase
the positive.
Now I think it's best torecognize appropriate
performance and leave it at thatand then use a correction as as
a reminder before they're goingto perform the next time, you
know.
So I come out and say AJ, you'redoing a great job with this.
And I'm very behaviorallyspecific.
I said because you're doingthis, here's the outcome you are

(08:54):
producing, right, cause whenwe're giving communication, we
need to be aligned behavior withresults, right, and we're
giving some sort of feedback forit.
But if you're getting ready todo a speech, like right and I
know you're a great publicspeaker, if you guys have never
heard AJ speak, he's amazing.
And I said and I thought youknow, I have some feedback to
give you.
I'm I.
After you did one speech, Isaid you did amazing with A, b

(09:15):
and C.
As you're planning for the nextone I might say hey, aj, you're
going to come out to the speechnext time, try doing this.
This might help you do engageyour audience right off the bat,
so it's a reminder just beforeyou're getting go out.
So now that gets you in touchwith the naturally occurring
positive reinforcement ofactually doing it.
So separating Now some peopledon't have time to do that, so I

(09:36):
do like a glows and grows.
Then here's what you're doingwell, and then I do the grows as
questions to get them toreflect on their own behavior.
You know what might happen ifyou do this right.
I think it's a real strong wayto like involve your
stakeholders, because we needthem to better assess problems,
solve, make decisions and takeactions despite us, right?
So, yeah, that's that's.

(09:56):
That's my take on thereinforcing piece of it.

Speaker 3 (09:59):
Oh, that's.
That's good for our listeners.
That communication, it's morethan just something that you
just do randomly.
There's a human, scientificcomponent to it, and that moves
us to our next prompt, pauline.
So we just talked about usingour communication to reinforce
our people and get more of thebehavior, the production, the

(10:22):
values that we want to see, andget more of the behavior, the
production, the values that wewant to see.
Let's move from reinforcing toresolving, and what we're
talking about is whereverthere's human beings, there's
going to be conflict.
Right as long as resources,power and perspectives exist,
we'll have to work to findcommon ground with people.
We'll have to work to findcommon ground with people.

(10:43):
And so we want to ask ourselveswhat is the best practice when
it comes to resolving conflictwith our communication.
And so, paulie, what have youfound that has worked really?

Speaker 2 (10:59):
well, resolving conflict using communication.
Yeah well, I think I got to tieback into something you've
already kind of outlined in thiswhen you were setting it up,
and that is to to reduce thelikelihood, first of all, that
we're going to have conflictwith people.
We need to engage peoplethrough shared values.
And, coming back to thereinforcement stuff, people need
to know what's in it for them.
You know how it's going to helpthem perform better, how it's

(11:20):
going to make their job easier,how it's going to help them to
produce valued outcomes.
And so when we do that, when wedo give feedback, when we're
helping to say, maybe correctperformance, they're going to
understand the why behind it.
Right, and you've agreed onthis stuff up front and ideally
you're agreeing on this stuff bygiving people voice and choice

(11:41):
and things.
This is how we engage ourstakeholders and, of course,
you're positively reinforcing,right.
So your very presence is good.
And so when you do have tocorrect performance in some way
or have an issue, it's going tobe much more fruitful because
it's not an adverse culture here, right, people understand that.
You're in it together.
It makes it so much better.

(12:02):
But if all you're doing iscorrecting performance, you're
going to have a lot of issues toresolve and people are not
going to think that you're in itwith them, especially if they
don't understand what's in itfor them, like how it's tapping
into their shared values.
And for me that's that leadinghand.
I talk about, right, engagingyour stakeholders.
You know creating a want.
They understand how they'redoing uh ties into a bigger

(12:25):
picture, even from the mostmenial task, which is hard for
people like you know doing thepaperwork that sucks, but they
understand how thisaccomplishment ties into the,
the greater good of theorganization, like in schools,
they're understanding that's howour students are going to
perform better and it's how youknow they're going to live a
better life, etc.
Et cetera, et cetera.
There's so much to tie into,but I think that when it comes

(12:48):
to conflict, if you've set good,if you, first of all, people
have a vision right, theyunderstand the why it's tied in
their values.
If you've involved them in goalsetting right, and they've
agreed on the goals, you'veunpacked those goals into
measurable accomplishments thatlet you know that they're moving
towards, that.
If they have and this is, Ithink, to your point if they
have the knowledge and skillsand resources to be successful,

(13:10):
then, when it comes time, it'sso much easier because you've
set this up right.
You bring people in.
You say, hey, what goal are weworking on?
You know, tell me.
You know what are you doing,what happened as a result of
your doing?
You know, what do you think youcan do more or less or
differently?
And what I like to do is bringthe data and have the person
speak to the data, because maybethere's some things that I'm

(13:31):
missing, rather than come in andsay you're not doing your stuff
.
And so I like to use goodquestionings here and I like to
again get people to reflect ontheir own performance and how
that is aligned with the currentgoals, and you get a lot done
there.
I'd like to ask permission.
You know, hey, guys, is it okayif we talk about this?
I have some feedback that Iwant to give, and feedback

(13:53):
should not be a bad word,because you should be giving
lots of feedback for good things.
You know like, hey, can I giveyou some feedback?
And you make it a positivething.
So now you're pairing feedbackwith a positive, but a lot of
people here can I give you somefeedback?
Like, oh, I'm in trouble.
You don't want feedback to bethat way.
But if you do it with thisproblem solving approach and you
get them to reflect on theirown performance and the goals

(14:13):
because you've done what'shappened as a result of what
they've done, and then we justsay, okay, what do you think you
can do more or lesser,differently to produce that?
If they don't know, this iswhere we can.
Okay, can I help you with this?
You know, can we establish thisstuff?
So that's the way I would goabout it Very systematic, very

(14:37):
practical and it's putting thepower back into their hands.

Speaker 3 (14:39):
Yeah, absolutely, and that's so well said.
And I love what you said aboutfeedback and some people seeing
that as having a negativeconnotation to it.
I think that's a good sign thatyou're doing it wrong or you
haven't established the rightculture of feedback is seen as
something that people are goingto be fearful of.
I see it very similar.

(15:11):
I think that the first step isunderstanding that conflict is a
natural, reoccurring thing inhuman beings, so I think we
should embrace a healthyconflict out on the other side,
in a better place in arelationship, and so it's not

(15:32):
about getting what you want orme getting what I want.
When you win the argument, youlose connection, and so really,
conflict needs to be seen as howcan we resolve this problem and
maintain connection?
It's not you versus me, it's meand you versus this problem,

(15:54):
and so you know my wife and Iobviously we tried to maintain a
healthy relationship, just likeyou would a working
relationship, and we have a rulethat we never go to bed angry,
and that's helped, because nowI'm recording a podcast after
having not slept for four days,right, so joke in there.
But effective communication, itis more than being friendly.

(16:19):
It involves enjoyable anddifficult conversations, and
I'll tell you a quick story.
One weekend I'm running to thestore for my wife.
My wife was doing some bakingand she she was missing an
ingredient, and so I jumped inthe truck to head down the
street to the grocery store andmy son's in the car and I like

(16:39):
to sometimes play some, you know, some kind of old school music
and kind of let him hear some ofthe things I grew up with my
grandfather playing for me.
So I said I'm going to put onsome Marvin Gaye and as I start
to peel out of the driveway,Marvin's not coming through the
speaker.
Instead it's Shania Twain.
I don't have any Shania Twainon my phone.

(17:00):
I'm wondering what's going onand what actually happened.
Paulie is my wife's phone.
That was still inside in thekitchen.
My truck was still Bluetoothsynced to her phone, not my
phone, and so I had to stop thetruck, turn off the truck, turn
it back on and make sure myphone was synced up to get the

(17:22):
kind of music that I wanted tobe listening to.
And I think that's a pretty goodanalogy of how conflict can
work sometimes If we're notsynced up and having the right
connection and the rightcommunication, we're going to
struggle to resolve conflict.
People's brains are going to beclosed like Chick-fil-A on a

(17:42):
Sunday, if we're not in tunewith each other.
So one of the tips that I liketo try to use is ask myself what
type of conversation am Ihaving right now with this
person?
Is it an emotional conversation?
Does my wife want me to solvethe problem?
Not if it's an emotionalconversation.
Does my direct report want me tosolve the problem?

(18:04):
Not if it's an emotionalconversation.
They want me to listen and beempathetic.
Are we having a practicalconversation, Meaning, are we
trying to fix something or arewe being strategic about
something?
Or is this a socialconversation?
Is this just us connecting witheach other, trying to relate
and see each other fromdifferent perspectives?

(18:24):
So being synced up, having theright conversation with the
right person, is criticallyimportant, I think, when
resolving conflict.
Paulie and John Maxwell in hisvery popular book he says
everyone communicates but fewconnect.
So for our listeners, I'd askyou are you connecting with
those you lead and not justcommunicating through conflict?

Speaker 2 (18:47):
Yeah, I have.
I had two things to say, and Ialready forgot one of them,
Right, and that was very wellsaid, AJ.
Oh, here's the first one.
Number one is that I've seenleaders that really try to avoid
having to give correctivefeedback because they want to
avoid conflict.
As I mentioned earlier, if youdo those things, you're going to
really make this a positiveoutcome, or increase the
likelihood that you will,because you're helping somebody.

(19:08):
But if you avoid conflict rightif you're behaving in a way
that just is to avoid conflict,things are going to go wrong.
There's no way everybody can beperforming at the highest level
all the time.
Things change, the environmentchange, just stuff happens,
right, and so you need toaddress that stuff.
Otherwise, you might have ahappy, crappy organization.
In other words, people feelcomfortable, but they're going

(19:29):
to lose respect for you ifyou're not correcting their
performance.
In a, before I go into correctperformance, I put on my lens,
and that is my performancediagnostic lens.
I talk about this with my fourhats, right, and that is if
somebody is not performing yourstandard.

(19:50):
It really comes down to twosimple things it's a can't do
versus don't do.
It's a skill deficit versus amotivation deficit, right, and
so if I'm trying to resolvesomething and they have a skill
deficit, I'm going about thewrong way.
I got to make sure they havethe knowledge and the skills to
be successful.
And AJ, that's easy todetermine that.
Ask them do you know whatyou're supposed to be doing?
Can you tell me?
Can you show me what you'resupposed to be doing?

(20:10):
Can you do it quickly?
If any of those are no, wellthen I really need to work
harder, smarter, do all thisstuff you know?
Dah dah, dah.
Man, if telling people what todo like that worked, we wouldn't

(20:32):
be here right now having thisdiscussion.
A lot of the this really becomesa self-reflective piece of it,
and that is how often, ifthey're not motivated and so, by
the way, sometimes it can justbe a habit, right?
I'm going to say don't do itright.
It's not always aboutmotivation, it's about maybe
there's not in the habit.
Everybody takes time to develophabits Like they don't have
something on their calendar.
There's not a reminder comingthrough, right, Simple prompts.

(20:54):
But there's also has to do withthe leadership, the management
that's going on there, and thatis how often is that person
being observed?
How often are they gettingfeedback.
What kind of feedback is it?
Are we?
How are they seeing the impactof their behavior on the
environment?
Right the outcomes?
Do they value those outcomes?
Are we asking them to do toomany things at once?
Because if everything isimportant, nothing's important.

(21:17):
So I do a lot ofself-reflection as a leader
first before I want to gocorrect their performance.
Right, If I've checked all theboxes, then it's time to have
this tough talk.
So, yeah, I think that's animportant piece of it.
It's called the PerformanceDiagnostic Checklist.
I have it in all my books.
They're free online.
You can check them out or checkout one of my articles.
But powerful stuff, man.

Speaker 3 (21:38):
I love it.
I love it.
And so we talked aboutreinforcing, which is for more
production.
We just talked about resolving,which is to restore partners
and work through conflict.
Let's move on to our thirdprompt, which is reciting.
And when we talk about reciting, we're talking about the speech
, we're talking about thepresentation, we're talking

(22:01):
about the big meeting, the bigproposal, right, and so this is
all about your people castingvision, inspiring people,
getting good information to thepeople who need it, and so we
want to talk about that for alittle bit.
Why is public speaking soimportant as a leader to our

(22:22):
communication?

Speaker 2 (22:23):
Oh, brother, this is huge.
I'll tell you what.
I don't know if you know this,but public speaking was my
greatest accomplishment in life,my biggest fear to overcome.
If you would have told me thatthis happened, that I have to
speak in front of 10 peoplethree months out, every morning,
I'd wake up feeling sick to mystomach.
10 people three months out,every morning.

(22:43):
I'd wake up feeling sick to mystomach.
Man, I'd rather fight and Ihave in front of 20,000 people
live than speak in front of 10.
I don't know what happened to mewhen I was a kid.
I must've done something andpeople laughed at me and just
put this fear in me and I knowit's a common fear of people,
but it was unusual.
I actually even took one timeearly on.
I took NyQuil before I went inthere.
What a fool.
I was thinking I was going todull my senses.
All it did was make me tiredand more anxious.

(23:06):
Man, it was silly.
But I know you get in front ofpeople a lot out here and so
you're always trying to.
You know it's a field whereyou've got to keep people
focused on the importance of thework, because you're working
with youth right, developingthem.
What's more important than that, because you're working with
youth right, developing them.
What's more important than that?
So?

Speaker 3 (23:29):
how critical is being able to recite, present and
articulate your message.
Yeah, I think it's absolutelyessential for just about any
formal leadership role, but Ithink it's also critical
regardless of where you're onthe org chart is being able to
communicate effectively, speakin front of many people, Because
obviously I think if you cancast vision and get your message

(23:51):
out to many people at one time,I mean that's just going to be
a lot more efficient right asfar as getting things done and
moving the needle on the mission.
And so not just you knowreciting in front of large
audiences, but also in front ofmeetings.
Do you speak up at the righttime during the meeting?
Do your followers view you as aperson that will stand up and

(24:14):
speak up for what's right?
You know, as leaders, ourwhisper is a roar but our
silence can be deafening.
And so, as a leader, yourposition, your title, that will
get them to kind of open thebook, open the novel and read
the first chapter, but then whatyou say and do, that's going to
determine if they turn the pageor close the book.

(24:38):
And so I think that obviously,public speaking, a lot of people
have a trepidation about that.
I grew up with a speechimpediment.
It's also one of my biggestaccomplishments, Paulie, to have
developed into a competentspeaker, and they say that 75%
of the population has a fear ofpublic speaking, which means

(25:01):
more than 200 million peoplefeel nervous about talking to
others.
So for any of our listeners,you're not alone and it is
something that you could getbetter at.
It's something a lot of peoplefear, I think the comedian
Seinfeld said and I heard itagain here recently is most
people would rather be in thecasket than given the eulogy uh

(25:25):
right, people fear speaking.
Uh, more than deaf, uh, in somecases.
And so it's something that wecan all get better at and
something that we can improvethat.
Uh, what are your thoughts onthat?

Speaker 2 (25:53):
oh man, I listen, I have a lot of thoughts on that.
I believe this is my leadinghat and that is you want to
engage your stakeholders andthat requires inspiration.
And then that kind oftransitioned into authenticity
and I and I always just tried tobe me Right.
So I tried to let my own valuesand my, my passion come through
, but of course I had to know Ihad to be knowledgeable about my
stuff, which was reallyimportant.
But here's one of the bigmistakes I made back in the day.

(26:16):
That was, I used to come outand talk about all the great
things the science of humanbehavior can do, you know, to
make improvements, right, butwhat I should have been doing is
understanding what the people'svalues and pain points are
first, and make sure that mytalk goes directly to them,
because I need each person outin the audience to hear me, to

(26:36):
hear how what I'm saying isgoing to be meaningful for the
things that are important tothose people.
So when I got intoorganizations regardless because
, as you and I agree, leadershipis not about title and I feel
very passionate about leadershipI believe that we can all be
leaders and talk about like, ifyou engage in these behaviors.
Here's how you can producevalued outcomes for yourself and

(26:57):
for the people that you careabout the most, and it makes
them perk up right.
So we got to start with thatend in mind, and it's the end
for our listeners, and there'sbeen books written on this stuff
.
You know, like even this, whatpeople in sales do and I don't
think it's manipulative.
They'll say what's important toyou Because they need to know
what they're presenting to you,how it's going to tie into the
thing that is, that your value,your need.

(27:20):
So it's really important.
So, uh, I I believe in the powerof storytelling and organic
storytelling.
I just look back on my own lifeand think about where's the
lesson in there and I got a lotof lessons because I've screwed
a lot of stuff up.
You know and uh, but for me,I've looked back on it through
my newfound lens, or now it'sold found lens.
You know behavior, science andthink about okay, what, what was

(27:42):
going well, where did I make amistake?
Right, using using this lens,and how can I be better the next
time?
I'm constantly reflecting on myown behavior and the impact of
it on others, and I think that'swhat all leaders should be
doing right Is taking a look atwhat they're doing, how it's
impacting others, because it'snot about intent in the end, as
you and I know and that's thetagline for the show it's about

(28:05):
impact.
So I'd love that one Publicspeaking folks do some
investment on it.

Speaker 3 (28:11):
Become better at that .
And Paulie let me jump in therebecause some of our listeners
might be saying well, aj, you'rea certified speaker with the
John Maxwell team.
Paulie, you've been speakingall over the world.
You guys do keynotes andconsulting for organizations.
It's easy for you guys to makepublic speaking sound easy.
What would we say to ourlisteners who may be feeling

(28:35):
that way, paula?

Speaker 2 (28:37):
Well, I can tell you right now that I have this.
So I have this thing called thebehavior alignment compass, and
what it says is that sometimeswe might value something, but
sometimes we have these thoughtsand feelings show up for us.
We get angry, we get afraid,anxious, right, and that that

(28:57):
creates this fight, fight, uh,freeze or fawn response to us,
and so we'll engage in behaviorsthat provide us some sort of
immediate relief.
You know, like when it came topublic speaking, somebody says,
hey, we're doing a talk out here.
I'm wondering if you know youcan join us and give me the talk
.
When I was working with theschool board, I'm like, no, I'll
tell you what.
I'll do the PowerPoint, I'llset up the room, I'll do all the

(29:27):
research, anything but do atalk.
And they say, okay, that soundsgreat, no problem, and I would
feel immediate relief and thatfelt so good.
But over time I recognize I'mnot really behaving in line with
my values.
I really, I'm really passionateabout disseminating the
sciences of human behavior,right, powering people to better
help themselves and others.
And so I started to feel guiltyover time, and so I had to
become aware that when I feltthis way, that I behaved that
way, I had to be aware that thatwasn't misaligned with my core
values and instead I had toengage in some replacement

(29:49):
behaviors.
And what were those?
Well, I really had to researchpublic speaking.
I had to watch public speakers.
I'd watch videos on them.
I had to learn how to slow myspeech down.
I started saying, okay, let metake a very small chunk of this,
cause I'm like I can't do anhour, you know, but maybe I can
do five minutes on this topicthat I feel very passionate
about, and so I'd know it verywell.
And I now I had my little storyto tell.

(30:10):
I learned about you know some,some storytelling techniques,
and I would know about the skillor whatever.
I'd have a nice visual to walkme through it and I do it, and
I'd see people nodding, they'dsmile and I'd see them thinking
they might come up to me and saythat was a really good point.
That's getting me in touch withlots of positive reinforcement
for doing it.
Then, over time, I started toextend that.
Now and that whole time I hadthat monkey in my back, brother.

(30:34):
I was feeling anxious as heck,right.
But I accepted that.
I felt that way.
I didn't focus on it.
It's like fighting Right youcan't focus on.
I feel anxious.
I got to focus on what I needto do in the fight in order to
produce the value outcome that Iwant Right Winning, being safe.
You know, getting the crowdinvolved, you know getting more
fights as a result of it.
So I think that's a trick beingaware, accepting it, don't try

(30:57):
to fight it.
We are all humans.
We have thoughts and feelingsand these broad decisions show
up.
Man, you just got to accept it.
I initially might take a deepbreath to refocus and just focus
on the things that I'm supposedto do and if I'm very prepared,
it makes it so much better andit gets me in touch with
positive reinforcement.
Now, last year, aj, I spoke infront of 4,000 people and when

(31:18):
they said, would you going to doit, I did have a little bit of
anxiety, but I said yes, and I'mgoing to frigging crush it.
And I did crush it because Ilove it so much.

Speaker 3 (31:26):
Yeah, and I think that mastery is the offspring of
repetition, I think, thepracticing, the honing of your
craft.
I mean, if you wanted to begood at basketball, you'd study
the goats, right.
You study MJ, you study Kobe,you study LeBron.
I mean, have you watched MartinLuther King Jr give a speech?

(31:51):
Have you, you know, googledWinston Churchill, jfk?
You know we can get so muchbetter from practicing, working
towards our craft, but alsoseeing who's done it really well
and trying to emulate some ofthe things they've done.
So I would encourage anybodywho's listening to go work on

(32:12):
that, work on that, try to getbetter at that.
Don't just settle for where youare.
Even though Paulie said it,even though he was a speaker for
many, many years, he got alittle apprehensive when it came
time for a bigger speech.
You know I continue to have towork to get better.
I just attended a workshop onTuesday to try to enhance my

(32:35):
public speaking.
So it's a journey, never afinal destination.
With that, let's move on to ournext prompt.
So we just talked aboutreciting, which is public
speaking for our people.
Let's talk about reflecting forcore principles, and what I
mean by reflecting is ourcommunication.
Of course, it must cast vision,but it also needs to reflect

(32:59):
our values and beliefs.
But how do we do that?
And so, when we talk aboutreflecting our character, we
want who we are on the inside tobe evident on the outside, and,
paulie, I know the first twoepisodes.
You talked a lot about say-docorrelation.
Is that something that fitswell in terms of reflecting our

(33:21):
values and communication?

Speaker 2 (33:24):
Yeah, I think there's two things here Absolutely
right.
So, in other words, we do whatwe say we're going to do.
One of the worst things aleader can do is say they're
going to do something and not doit.
That really hurts trust, itreally hurts integrity.
You know, people want tobelieve that their leader has
integrity.
They want to believe that ifyou say you're going to do
something, that you're going todo something, so that means it's
, you know, very important thatyou're very careful with the

(33:46):
things that you're going to say.
Now this goes back to what I wasjust mentioning about the
behavior alignment, compass, andthat is because you mentioned,
you know we got to.
We want to make sure that ourcharacter, who are we on the
inside, is evident, evident onthe outside.
So this is why we have to beconstantly reflecting on our
behavior and is it in alignmentwith our values?

(34:07):
That's that behavior, alignment, compass, constantly doing that
.
But we can't just think aboutit from our perspective right,
about our intent.
We have to measure our impact.
And when we really valuesomething, we our perspective
right About our intent.
We have to measure our impactand when we really value
something, we measure it right.
We have people talk aboutvaluing things.
You know there's values in theorganization, there's values on
the walls and man.
Those values should manifestthemselves in behaviors In the

(34:30):
organization.
Should we identify the keybehaviors that people need to
engage in and then we need tomeasure whether we're producing
the outcomes right, these valueswe say you know, hey, we value
responsibility.
What does responsibility mean?
Showing up on time?
You know turning your paper,doing your work, whatever it is.
We value good communication.
What does that mean?
It means asking questions.
It means you know givingfeedback.

(34:51):
It means accepting feedback.
You know being sincere.
When you compliment somethinglike that, you know, bring it
down to behaviors.
But we have to remember that'snot about intent, it's about
impact.
So we need to check in with ourpeople, our stakeholders, to
see, as a leader, how am Iactually impacting them, how so
we call this social validity inour field?
So we might be producing goodresults in organization.

(35:13):
You know we're hitting those,those.
Those KPIs are looking reallygood.
We're hitting our goals andit's wonderful.
But there are many ways toachieve goals.
Some of them are like throughusing coercion.
Some of them are unethical.
You know we've seen peoplecheat to achieve certain results
.
But we might be really wellintended, but maybe we're doing

(35:36):
things that are pushingperformance and we think things
are going well, but people arenot receiving it well.
They're like they're doing itand they're performing well and
the problem with that there's somany different problems with
that because it's notsustainable.
Uh, to me it's not aligned myvalues.
I feel like that forcing peopleor being nasty to them, it just
really is outside of what Ibelieve good leadership is.
Um, but sometimes being nastyto them, it just really is

(35:57):
outside of what I believe goodleadership is.
But sometimes you don't knowhow people feel and sometimes
they might mistake what you sayand that's on you if you're
saying in a way that doesn'thave the desired impact.
But we have to measure that, wehave to check in with our
people and we should do itfrequently.
We have things like climatesurveys, culture surveys, and
they give them at the end of theyear and, aj, you've heard me
say this, that's an autopsy.
That's going back to at thebeginning.

(36:18):
We were talking about goodcommunication.
We need to have regular feedbackloops going on and feedback
loops one of the big issues I'veseen in organizations is
delayed feedback loops Feedbackloops for when somebody's doing
something right right so theyknow that it's going right and
also correcting behavior,because if you let the wrong
thing go for too long, it canproduce all sorts of bad

(36:40):
outcomes and it starts to becomea cultural norm and this is the
way that we do things aroundhere, right?
So we need people to haveregular feedback loops going on
there.
Ideally, they're recruitingfeedback from their own
environment, in other words,they're looking at their
behavior and the impact of it onthe environment.
That's the ultimate goal, right, having people better observe
their behavior and how it'simpacting their goals.

(37:02):
Right, the things that they'reworking towards, so they can
self-adjust.
But we need to be out theretaking a look at what's going on
and mostly reinforcing it, butcorrecting in a way that's
helping and not hurting, as wetalked about earlier.
So this is incredibly importantto have these tight feedback
loops and including making surethat we are doing things that

(37:23):
are aligned with our values,which means soliciting feedback
from our people.
Hey, how am I doing for you?
I know we're hitting resultsright.
Is this working for you?
Is there something that I cando more or less or differently
for you?
And they might say well, youknow he said this the other day
in this.
Oh, I had no idea.
Thanks for bringing that to myattention.
Or hey, I know I said that.

(37:44):
Let me give you a deeper why.
Maybe I wasn't clear about this.
Here's why we have to do this.
The state just puts this demandon, and I don't love it, you
know, but it's like somethingthat we have to do because it's
a state mandate or whatever, youknow.
So if you have ideas to make itbetter, more efficient, right
where we can you know it's notso disruptive let me know.
I'm willing to hear, I'm opento it.

Speaker 3 (38:02):
So now we're involving people, we're giving
them voice and choice and we'recoming back to the why that we
talked about a little bitearlier.

Speaker 2 (38:08):
Yeah, and what about you, brother?
You know what have you foundeffective towards reflecting
your values in your owncommunication?

Speaker 3 (38:19):
Yeah, I go back to what you said about saying do
correlation.
I think the fastest way to loseyour credibility is if your
people view you as somebody whohas lost your integrity and
you've lost your people, and soI think it's very important to
do what you say.
Lost your people, and so Ithink it's very important to do
what you say.
I think starting relationshipsoff and showing that integrity

(38:40):
with what you say is absolutelyparamount.
There's a joke I heard one timethat says what do you call a
conversation between two liars Ajob interview?
And so I mean, start startingthe relationship off right with
good intentions, doing what this, what you say you will do.
Somebody said when you openyour mouth, you tell the world

(39:02):
who you are.
I'm kind of the mindset and mypersonality is kind of wired
where I'm very seldom lukewarmon any subject.
I'm either all in or all out ondifferent ideas.
And the people who work closelywith me I don't want them to be
ever second guessing like whatwould AJ think on a particular

(39:23):
subject the people who know mebest.
I want them to say oh, aj wouldsay this about that or this.
I want my values to be just soreflective of who I am and what
I believe in be just soreflective of who I am and what
I believe in Dale Carnegie.
He wrote in his 1935 book howto Win Friends and Influence

(39:44):
People and this book was writtenin 1935.
But if you haven't read it, Iencourage you to pick it up.
It still holds up surprisinglywell to this day.
We talk about positive feedbackand giving people positive
feedback, and for some leadersthey may feel like, oh, I'm
being fake or phony.
Well, carnegie tells us it'slike praise is different from

(40:05):
flattery One is sincere and theother is insincere, it's
counterfeit.
And so I would say, if you'rehaving trouble seeing value in
people, that's not a sign oftheir lack of production,
necessarily, it's probably asign of your internal values.

(40:26):
Mark Cole for the John Maxwellteam.
He often says do you want to beloved or do you want to lead?
Do you want to lead?
And so you also got to be ableto have those difficult
conversations with people and beable to be transparent and a
caring way with people, notbeing a politician, but being a
leader.
I think leadership is aboutmore than shaking hands and

(40:49):
kissing babies.
As leaders, our actions have tomatch our workers and so, um,
you have to be willing to dothat.
You have to communicate valuein your people.
You also got to be willing tohave difficult conversations.
Um, leadership is not aboutnecessarily making everybody
happy.
You know you want to makeeverybody happy.

(41:09):
Go go drive an ice cream truck.
It requires a balance of both,but you definitely want to serve
people well.
They need to know your heartand your intent needs to reflect
that in your behavior.

Speaker 2 (41:25):
Yeah, you mentioned something about like our
internal guide I forget thewords that you use exactly and I
think it's fair to mention hereabout reflecting.
One of the things that we needto be aware of is our own bias,
right, because there's thisphenomena that occurs, called
confirmation bias, and that is,we tend to look for things that
support our existing beliefs andwe miss the other things, and

(41:45):
it's like a kid.
The easiest example I give is astudent that's misbehaving in
the classroom, right, I've seenthis all the time and the
teachers were frustrated, and Iget it because that behavior is
very challenging.
But let's say they were likecalling out, you know, six times
an hour, right, and now they'vecalled out four times an hour.
All the teacher sees is thatthe student's still calling out,

(42:06):
right, they're not seeing thegradual improvement that's
happened, actually a significantimprovement, because that's a,
you know, 33% improvement incalling out behavior.
So it's very easy to get andthis happens in politics all the
time where people are justsaying, oh, there they go again,
there they go again.
Nobody's recognizing some ofthe good things that are
happening.
So it's it's it's everybody'sgot bias in some ways, right,

(42:29):
and this is why it's importantto involve stakeholders.
This is why it's important tocheck yourself by asking for
feedback and to lift up the hoodon things.
Don't just make assumptions.
Correlation is not causation,right, at least not simple
correlation.
So we need to make sure thatwe're looking deeper into things
and if we find ourselves in apattern of oh, here they go

(42:52):
again, here they go again, letthat be a red flag to you, right
?
And if here they go again,there's always a reason for it.
Remember it's a can't do versusdon't do.
If they're doing something,what do they need from you as a
leader to be better tomorrowthan they are today?

Speaker 3 (43:05):
Yeah, and I think for any listener because I know we
have various, you know leadersin different roles and whatnot,
and talk about reflecting yourvalues and being a person of
integrity that also it doesn'tnecessarily mean if you're a
high ranking leader.
Obviously you have to havediscretion about the timing and

(43:27):
the way you communicatedifferent things to your
organization.
I'm not saying you have to be ablabbermouth.
I'm not saying you have to be ablabbermouth, you know either,
and be a communicator thatdoesn't operate with good
discretion at different times.
Craig Rochelle, greatleadership guru, and he's got a
great podcast as well.
He says everything true doesn'tneed to be said, but everything

(43:52):
you say needs to be true, andthat kind of speaks to
discretion.
Like sometimes the bestcommunication is actually
knowing what not to say incertain situations.
A quick story I tell in one ofmy presentations.
I say there's this rattlesnakeand he's trying to get across

(44:12):
the Grand Canyon and he says,man, this will take entirely too
long for me to slither my waydown this ravine and all the way
across.
So he sees two eagles and hesays, hey, I got an idea.
I'm going to put this stick inmy mouth.
Can you two grab both ends andcarry me to the other side.
Eagles say well, what's in itfor us?
We're not trying to get bit byyou, we're not trying to be

(44:35):
poisoned by you.
And he says hey, right acrossthat Grand Canyon, I got to tell
you there is just a load ofrodents and things that you
would love to feast on.
It's a win-win situation if youcould just grab a hold of the
stick and carry me across.
So the snake bites a hold ofthe stick, pauly.
Eagles are carrying them acrossthe Grand Canyon, and down

(44:57):
below there's this desert foxthat looks up and sees what's
going on and he says the foxsays wow, what a brilliant idea.
Whose idea was that?
And the snake says it was me.
And so sometimes we just needto know when to keep our mouth

(45:17):
closed in certain situations,because when you do decide to
open your mouth, it needs to betruthful and it needs to be
helpful for your team andhelpful for your organization.

Speaker 2 (45:30):
I like the stories, man.
What's next?
This is the last on the list.

Speaker 3 (45:38):
Yeah, yeah, let's move to our last prompt.
So that is reflecting.
We want to represent our valuesand our belief systems when we
lead and when we communicate.
Let's talk about.
Receiving is actually a two-waystreet.
People forget thatcommunication is a two-way

(46:05):
street.
It involves listening andunderstanding, and so we kind of
want to walk down the road ofwhy is it so critical to
leadership and why do so manypeople get it wrong?
They miss the opportunity toexplore the perspective of those

(46:25):
around them.

Speaker 2 (46:28):
I think this is huge, man.
I definitely see respect as atwo-way street.
I wrote an article on this.
I actually pulled it up whilewe were sitting here, so I'll
give some of my thoughts aboutthis.
What are your thoughts on thisone man?

Speaker 3 (46:43):
Well receiving.
As I said, it's about listening, and I think that poor leaders
often think communication is aone-way process, and I think
effective leaders know thatlistening and accepting feedback
as you said earlier, pauliethat's just as equally important
.
So it's not always about me, asa leader, having all the right

(47:05):
answers or trying to impose mythoughts on everybody not just a
monologue, but creating adialogue between me and the
people I lead, and so I try toget better at that.
I can tell you that it's verychallenging for most human
beings and it's reallychallenging for a lot of leaders

(47:25):
.
It's so challenging, I think,that potentially, you could be
in the top 2% of listenerswithin your organization and
still have a long way to go.
So it is a skill that requiresus being really intentional.
So it is a skill that requiresus being really intentional.
For me, I want to try to listenaggressively to my people that I

(47:49):
try to lead.
When they're trying tocommunicate their issues or
their concerns.
I want to speak confidently.
I want to speak as if I'm right, but when I listen, I want to
do it as if I'm wrong and reallytry to understand the
viewpoints of the people who I'mtrying to lead, and one of the

(48:09):
things I've heard before that Ithink is a good piece of advice
is in conversations, try to bemore interested in people than
you are trying to be interestingto people.
So we want to look at people asa gift.
There's something to open up,there's something to be
interested in, and many leadersthey get that wrong routinely.

(48:33):
What do you think, paul?

Speaker 2 (48:36):
Well, listen, people.
We said this earlier thatfeedback is a bad word to a lot
of people, and the reason whyit's a bad word is because a lot
of times it's been deliveredjust to tell people what they've
been doing wrong, and leadersare not an exception here.
They've also come in with theirown history of receiving
feedback, so it can be aversiveto people.
It can especially be aversiveto leaders who maybe shouldn't

(49:00):
be leaders, be aversive toleaders who maybe shouldn't be
leaders.
There's a small percentage ofleaders that fall into maybe
like a narcissistic category andthey don't want your feedback,
and that's a terrible thing.
I hate to see people elevatedto those positions where they're
not accepting a feedback.
Right, that's terrible.
I think that the best leadersare regularly seeking out
feedback, as I had mentionedearlier.
Right, they're constantlychecking in with people to see

(49:22):
how things are going.
Can they do something more orless differently?
This aligns with my own thoughtabout servant leadership.
If you're going to serve people, you need to know what they
value and not just what theyvalue, right, we need to measure
.
If we truly value our people,then we have some measures to
let us know how our people feelabout the way things are going
with them, and so I think it'sincredibly important to check in

(49:44):
with those folks on a regularbasis, and I do want to say this
that I think also we need tolike respect is a two-way street
, right.
I want to make sure that theleaders are respecting their
people.
You know they're celebrating,they're recognizing their
efforts we talked earlier.
They're celebrating milestones.
They're giving you know wetalked earlier celebrating
milestones they're givingpositive, personalized, positive

(50:04):
reinforcement, because peoplenot everybody wants to shout out
publicly, for example, right,they might want a private thing.
So we need to understand what'simportant to those folks,
because that can actuallyinadvertently hurt them
performing if they feel like, oh, I don't want to do this
because I'm going to getrecognized in front of everybody
and I don't like that.
It's embarrassing or whatever.
They need to be consistent.
And they also want to reinforcepeers for reinforcing each

(50:28):
other, right, because they'renot out in the environment.
So that's a really importantthing, but a lot of times we
think about it going onedirection.
This kind of feedback, right andrespect needs to go up as well.
There's the old saying thatleadership is lonely at the top,
and a lot of times, leaders areonly getting people that are
incoming, when they'redisgruntled for things, when
there's problems with it, right,and folks, if that's all you're

(50:51):
bringing to your leader, thenyour presence starts to become
aversive to them.
They got to be doing something,right, right, so make sure
you're showing them respect andfocusing.
Feedback is omnidirectional.
Positive reinforcement isomnidirectional.
It should not just go one way.
So acknowledge their wins.
If you like that they're doingsomething, let them know that
you like it and why you like it,what positive outcomes is

(51:14):
occurring, because it'llincrease the likelihood that
they're going to continue to doit.
Make sure you're giving props toyour peers, right, you know.
Be very specific with them yourleader and your peers right,
when you're giving some sort ofpraise.
So this stuff is reallyimportant.
We can't forget about whatthese folks are doing up there,
and that's going to help you inthe future, because if you do

(51:35):
need to give some sort ofcorrective feedback, you're not
going to be that person.
They're going to understandthat you're there to help and
you're not just the disgruntledperson complaining.
I want you to stop.
Pause for a second.
Think about when was the lasttime you directed positive
feedback up the chain.
Oh, wow, something to reflecton.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (51:53):
Yeah, that's a I love that point.
I love that point because,regardless, remember, leadership
is not a title or position,it's a verb, it's an action.
Right, no-transcript?

(52:15):
I mean I want to see more ofthat behavior from the people
that lead me.
Certainly, that's a reallyvaluable point when we talk
about receiving and listening.
You got to be open to it, yougot to have an open mindset and
open up your ears and listen topeople, and people are watching

(52:36):
to see what you do with thatfeedback too.
That's another thing that goesback to that say-do correlation.
I mean, because sooner or later, if you're not doing anything
with the feedback, people aregoing to stop giving you
feedback and wasting their time.
A year ago, paulie, I was on aflight coming back from a speech
engagement, speaking engagementexcuse me, I can't speak now.

(52:57):
Speaking engagement Excuse me,I can't speak now and I was
flying back, actually from FortLauderdale and I forgot to check
in.
I'm late for my flight and soI'm boarding in the last section
and the flight's running latebecause the airline crew was
late coming in from another cityand so I'm at the back of the

(53:17):
line and the line, you know, onthe board the plane is just
exceptionally long.
But the benefit of me beinglast in line, pauly, is I can
see the flight crew coming upbehind me and the pilot is in
front of everybody and all ofthese people are frustrated.

(53:41):
They're trying to get to theirdestination and they don't hear
the pilot trying to say excuseme.
He says excuse me like sixtimes, paul.
He's trying to get by thesepeople and I tap the guy in
front of me on a shoulder and Isay, hey, if you let this guy
pass, I promise he won't takeyour seat.
And he looks back and he seesthe pilot and he starts to move

(54:01):
him and his family over.
And then, you know, it's like adomino effect Everybody starts
to move over to let the pilot on.
But I think that's kind of howit is in life.
When we don't listen and payattention to our people, we
could actually be missing aperson who can take our mission
where it needs to go, who cantake us to the next level in a

(54:22):
lot of situations.
So, as leaders, that'scritically, critically important
that we actually are listeningto our people and taking action
on things that they're saying.
Woodrow Wilson said the ear ofthe leader must ring with the
voices of the people.
I think that's really goodadvice for us as leaders.

Speaker 2 (54:41):
Agree brother Agreed wholeheartedly on that.

Speaker 3 (54:46):
All right, so that is our last prompt.
I want to quickly rehash forour listeners, if I can here.
We talked about reinforcing,which is for more production,
that's, communicating positivefeedback to our people to get
more production and moreperformance out of them.
We talked about resolving,which is communicating in a way

(55:09):
to restore partners to resolveconflict.
We also talked about reciting,which is for our people, which
is public speaking, getting infront of the crowd, the
audiences, casting vision,inspiring people or just giving
good information to people.
We talked about reflecting,which is for core principles

(55:31):
it's letting who we are on theinside come through our
communication on the outside.
And, lastly, we also talkedabout receiving, which is about
exploring perspective, listeningand not just talking all the
time, but actually hearing thethings that the people we lead
are trying to tell us.
All right, Paulie, any partingshots, Paulie.

Speaker 2 (55:54):
No, man, I think I love these chats.
Man, I love digging in.
I love hearing your perspectiveon things.
I'm always learning, I alwayswant to learn.
So thanks everybody lovedigging in, I love hearing your
perspective on things.
I'm always learning, I alwayswant to learn.
So thanks everybody for joiningus and remember that in the end
, it's not about intentLeadership's about your impact.
Take care, guys, and we'll seeyou next time.