April 29, 2024 • 35 mins
TAM and mort tackle some articles that address the various feelings that revolve around loss. Loss is such a huge topic that there will always be plenty of writings about the topic, but we found some articles that we responded to.
Our beginning article by Ute Luppertz showed us some examples of animals experiencing loss. The heavy-hitter in the middle shared what losing a parent to dementia looks like for author Darren Weir. And we ended on a lighter note with a story by Molly Davies inviting us to the beach for her medical emergency.
For more about writing with vulnerability and information on articles discussed in the episodes, visit themonsteralley.com.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hi, I'm Tam and I'm eternally mortal and this is the hidden egg podcast where we talk about vulnerability and
(00:08):
stuff and things and
boobs
Look at the boob look at the boob
Well people that are listening can't look at the boob
But there's this cute little dog on on the chat that starts put up in a gif and it's being booked
And then it leaks the boob and it's adorable
Yeah, you you lick the boob when you're a puppy. That's just the thing. That's just the thing
(00:32):
Okay, so this this this episode
What is this episode six? Yep, we're on episode six of season four
So this episode the theme
What what did we decide the theme was I remember we had a theme actually the theme for this episode is gonna be loss
loss, right
The the articles that Tam and I found this week
(00:55):
We found three pretty powerful articles that we really resonated with and they just all kind of like
Revolved a bit of around the loss
And we also have quite a few shoutouts to do first though
Yes
Yes, we do. So I
(01:15):
Didn't coordinate the order with you. So I guess that's why you really needed the
The screen share, huh? No. No, I just remembered that it was a thing and it wasn't happening and that's all
But yeah, I was gonna let you go in whatever order you want I've got all of them up on my screen
So the first one I'm gonna shout out to Ben Ulansey for his article about what if the aliens think we're dinosaurs
(01:42):
Yeah, it's a perspective shift for some people for me. I like immediately it was like, oh, yeah
I didn't think about that, but that would make perfect sense and had a conversation with him before I even read the article
And he's like, wow, I didn't you just got that from the title like, okay
Well, some people might already have this perspective, but I think the majority of people don't really think about it
(02:05):
So that makes it a really great read. I
Think to shift perspectives
Yeah, it was a really cute conversation and I honestly hadn't come across the article until I saw that conversation
And so I didn't even like I know really get the opportunity to see how long it would take me to take to get it
But sorry reading reading the article was amazing
(02:25):
like it was so well written to lead you through the entirety of the concept of
how I
Want to say perspective that that's not the right word but like relatively not even I don't think relativity is wrong just
Distance just the sheer distance and how it would look to people fought to
(02:46):
Aliens far away to this for this planet. It was it was just so
Well-crafted in my opinion. Well, you kind of gave away the perspective, but that's fine. Oh
Well, okay. Yeah, you're right. It's fine. We'll move on. It's a good article. Go read it
Yeah, then there was this one's this one's the one that I don't think you actually read oh
(03:10):
Yeah, Ben's article is in Sturges pub. I didn't think about that. Is it oh
Yeah, it is in the random nerdiest collective. That's true
Check out that pub check out that pub. So then there's the one
Cristala Rosina and her article the camera never lies. Who are they kidding and
(03:31):
She published it in my pub Monster Cafe and I read it and I just I really enjoyed that perspective
It's another perspective piece where like some of the things that we tape take for granted
like
Particularly what she's talking about is cameras and and whether or not they actually tell you the truth
(03:52):
You know that whole a picture's worth a thousand words and you know
If it happened on camera, then it must be true or whatever
but like there's a lot of stuff you can do with perspective and lighting even before getting to the editing and
She just kind of goes into all of that and is like is it really the worst thing to have some touch-ups in a freaking picture?
(04:13):
That bring out who like what you really look like in person
Yeah, absolutely also Ben's here
We just talked about the
Aliens dinosaurs. Yeah. Okay, cool. Yeah, sorry
(04:35):
So that's why would you assume that there were kind words, I don't understand
But yeah perspective and
Being able to edit your pictures is what you were talking about
And yeah, I think that it's I think that creating what you want to portray to the world is always amazing
That's a form of art. Yeah, you just want to take like a bare photo
That's a different form of art. That's all well
(04:58):
I mean, there's the whole argument about like how much photoshopping is too much and you know that they they take it to an unnatural
degree where our expectations of beauty are like forever scarred and
I'm like, yeah, those things are definitely true and I totally I'm on board with like there is a limit
But I think we need to like as a society kind of agree on what that limit is to me
(05:22):
personally my limit is if
If when I look at the original picture and I look at the dot an altered picture if I feel like I've been lied to
By looking at those two and like they are so different that I can't even see
Like like it feels like a miss representation. That's my line, but that's so subjective
(05:44):
Yeah, it is but you know, that's the way that it's gonna and I guess it's just it's it's like one of those things
You're gonna if you're gonna put yourself out there in a certain regard
You have to expect that some people are gonna want to criticize it because they're just a there's trolls and B
There's just people that haven't really come out of their own perspective in certain regards and get triggered by things
(06:06):
So, you know, I guess it's just gonna happen. Yeah, so it was a phenomenal article also
Not I don't know if it was super vulnerable technically but like, you know
It's still a great article and that's why I wanted to shout it out
and then there was
Ute Luppert's
(06:27):
second
Article so we have two articles by Ute this this episode and we had to choose one because it just
Didn't seem right to have two of them be the main
So this was the kind of the week's runner-up. It's a really it almost like it was almost
(06:47):
difficult to make the decision
But the bestest boy was just just shy of the one we ended up choosing
Which we'll get to later on
But yeah, this one was this one made me feel a lot because it it was so
Caring and understanding like it was so
deep about being there for another entity in a way that
(07:12):
No one has to but it's always beautiful when you are. Does that make sense? Mm-hmm
Yeah, and I like Ute so just you know in in the middle of the shout-out
I'm gonna take this little aside Ute has this
this specific ability in
Her writing that when she's vulnerable, she's not so much vulnerable
(07:34):
about herself as she is vulnerable as a as a sort of voice for her animals
If that makes sense
Right
And portrays from for her animals is so revealing right like she she
Empathizes with her animals and it's that part is very obvious from everything that she writes, but then she like
(07:57):
Translates that into the article and it's a very
Unique kind of vulnerability that I don't see a whole lot
But like I just I just want to point that because like her articles all of them are awesome
But the bestest boy was definitely one that I was like, that's that's that's what her skill is. That's what she does
(08:20):
Right and I want to point out real quick that the main character of this story is Pablo and we're going to
See Pablo again later in the episode
Because I'm gonna mention him that's what I'm saying, you know cool
So and then there's the very last shout out before we get to the actual stuff and that was by Paco Taylor
(08:46):
And it was the 10 most totally traumatizing PG rated movies
That Generation X watched as kids
Yeah, and it was it was a hilarious run through of some really like
Deep and dark movies from like the mid 70s to the early 80s. I'll be honest with you like half of them
(09:10):
I had never either I hadn't heard of them or I just hadn't seen them
So that's okay
Technically you and I are at the very beginning of Gen Y and Millennials and this article was very
Gen X centric. Yes to where I you know
(09:30):
If Paco Taylor is upset that us Millennials are talking about it. I totally understand and we Millennials suck. It's totally true
Yeah, like Sturge says we're kind of Xennials
Yeah, but the definitely a lot of these movies were a little bit more
Before my time in such a way that I didn't I never got to them. They were classics that I've heard of except for one
One was completely new to me
But then other ones weren't really as traumatic to me as was all like honestly. Sorry to call out one specific
(09:57):
But I love the Dark Crystal
I loved the Dark Crystal as a child and yes skeksis were scary as all get out and fuck
But my god that I love the gelflings
Okay, but you do remember that when we were watching it with the intention of sharing it with our child
We realized halfway through the movie. This is not something that is age appropriate for them. I don't I don't think we ever
(10:23):
introduced Kai
to the Dark Crystal
I think that they just kind of lost interest after a certain point and like, you know
Media's
Yeah nowadays, but anyway, yeah, um, it was it was hilarious article though
Like all the way through I was laughing at multiple different points
It was it was delightful and this goes to show what great taste we have and or what great taste
(10:49):
Sturge has that he's read all of these already
Of course one day one day
We will be watching it again
Of course one day one day we will bring an article to you that you have not seen I guarantee it we will
(11:10):
You haven't seen this
No, he hadn't seen this article, but he had seen
Okay, he's seen all the movie. I see I see well then we're already starting he is more cultured than us
way more cultured
I don't you know what? I I just came across Paco recently myself. So
(11:30):
Yeah on the radar now
Yep, and that I believe concludes our shout out that's the shout outs. So now we're on to the first
the first one which is Ute Leppert's is
The the winner of this week's episode not the winner of like all of them
but like out of the two that we had from her this was
(11:52):
This one was definitely more vulnerable they made you cry
I I okay, so a little peek behind the curtain
For some of the articles that we look over for choosing for to talk about on the podcast
I'd like to read some of them out loud if neither one of us had read it yet
and I literally like had to
(12:15):
Stop a couple of times reading this one because the emotions hit me too hard and I couldn't read it
too hard and I couldn't control my voice
um
Yeah, the last couple of paragraphs especially
So this is called grieving pets
subtitle the depth of animal emotions and so you can get a bit of a sense for what it's about and also you could say that
(12:39):
Ute
maybe had a little bit of an advantage or maybe we had a little bit of a bias because we've you know
We've recently lost all of our long-term pets recently in the past couple of years. Let's say and it um,
It's still I mean we we loved our furball creatures dearly and we miss them
Uh so much to this day and so reading about because we they didn't all die at once one died at a time and
(13:05):
I feel terrible talking about it this lightly anyway
um our
Last cat that stayed with us until just about a year ago now. Yeah
We even though he was always kind of aloof in a certain regard what we could tell that he really missed
um you
When you passed and it was I mean just talking about it now is making me kind of fucking cry. So
(13:31):
um
but
so anyway, uh the whole
idea of this article was really really really touching and um,
I was really charmed by the mention of Pablo the the the dog from the previous article that we talked about
Because you know this is talking about all of Ute's pets and how they've reacted to each other as they've passed over the years and
(13:53):
my god is that vulnerable like
the people that have owned pets are
Know we know each other on site in a certain regard
But people that have owned pets long enough for them to pass from old age, especially like that's a that's a whole different level to it
Yeah, because I know a lot of people who have had pets, but then they got rid of them before
(14:13):
the worst started happening
Not usually because they gave up on the animal but because like they had life experiences that
Prevented them from continuing like, you know, they went to college or whatever
And so they'd leave their pets home with their parents and their parents actually went through the loss
While they were, you know halfway across the country or whatever
(14:35):
but
No, yeah, so being actually being there with the pet day to day
And watching the decline and then watching when you have multiple pets what happens to the survivors?
after one passes away like that's
That's a skill. That is something that I don't think
(14:55):
people understand
Like they're affected and they're not affected the way we're affected
They're affected in very different ways and they show it in very different ways and animal to animal. It'll be different
Absolutely, and i'll be honest like when we do
Branch back out into pet ownership
(15:17):
I'm going to look up this article and look at ways to help pets deal with grief
And try and take action in that regard because there was some really amazing like ideas and
Implementations that I was read in this article about helping pets get through grief
And it was I was I was floored honestly
(15:39):
Well, then if that's what you want to do, you know what you you know what you're going to need to to learn how to do right?
No, what make a new list?
What so that you can save this list
In a special or save this article in a special list on medium that you can come back to
And know what it's for
(16:00):
So what you're talking about is being able to retain I got you understood
Yeah, well because like when we were we weren't we were going over these articles
You were I was like, yeah, you could make you know, you can make different lists
And if it's public the mobile one like you kind of gave me this look like
Why would I ever actually make a list? Doesn't it have a list? It's got this one list
Why would I ever need another one? How dare you?
(16:22):
I don't even use the list that's available to me. Yeah, I know I know because
I live so much in the poet in the poet in the moment that I just
Don't even
I'm like if i'm not reading it right now, then there's almost no chance that I read it. So
I haven't I also it's possible that I might you know, go like surge and
(16:47):
Go too crazy with it get too big with it and
Uh go too crazy with it get too big with it. Look, you don't need to go that far just one
Secondary list so that it's it's you know
A separate place and then you can use your regular reading list for things that like are for the podcast or whatever that
(17:07):
That you you you take them off the list and it filters out but have one that's just like i'm just going to put
really good shit in here and
And read it again someday when I think about oh, I want to come back to that article
I I understand what you're talking about. Absolutely. I was going to get a little bit more vulnerable for a minute. Oh, i'm sorry
I'm sorry. No, no, no, don't let me stop you. You didn't stop anything
(17:31):
Sturge feels attacked
I make great use of the list feature on medium you do sturge but see
Not like most people can't read several hundred articles in a day and actually understand what they've said
So like I can't put you as the bar
I uh, I would genuinely feel uh an element of responsibility to everything I added to a list
(17:59):
You're right though that a list of stuff that i've already read that I want to refer back to in the future would probably hold
A lot less of that responsibility on me. Yeah, why I was gonna say
What's the responsibility that it would hold on you if nobody knows that the list exists?
But you like you're the only one that knows that this list even exists
What responsibility would you have to it?
(18:22):
Doing the right thing being a good boy. What's the right thing?
Whatever my internal, uh
Madness tells me is the right thing or maybe whatever my uh,
Inner demon won't yell at me for maybe
So you don't have anything right now that's
The right thing to do
In this moment? Yeah
(18:44):
Just continue the podcast to the best of my ability
That's what this moment is
Okay, gotcha
They're talking about mimosas days. I don't know what mimosas days are. I don't know what that is
Is that a book? Is that a oh it's oh they're a writer. Okay. That's an author. Yeah, I have not seen mimosas days
I'll have to look into them
(19:05):
Because if you're both saying that they're awesome, then obviously they're somebody that I want to know
And read
Yeah, we should definitely check them out
Are you ready? You ready to move on to the next one?
The next one's the hard hitter like you'd think this one was because this this one was pretty deep but uh the next one
Yeah, well uta's
(19:26):
Article was delightful and impactful and I appreciated it so much
So yeah, let's move on I refuse I refuse to maracas that
Specifically because I know ben did it. Okay moving on
So the heavy hitter
Was um by darren weir
(19:46):
I hope i'm saying his name right it could be where I guess
Um, and it's called losing my mom one memory at a time
Helping a loved one through dementia
Yeah, and this is heavy this is absolutely heavy
um because I mean
A lot of people
In the country and in the world have had to deal with um, i've had to live through
(20:12):
A relative having dementia
and
It made me cry too. I read this one aloud as well and I didn't get all the way through it before
My voice broke didn't you have a grandparent that had dementia?
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, and I uh
(20:34):
Look, I read through darren's article here. We read through darren's article and it was um, like you can feel the relationship
Between him and his grandma you can really tell that
Like there was a closeness there that I don't really know that I can say that I felt was
Either of my grandmas to be honest, I I loved them both and you know, I had little nicknames and we had little
(20:56):
Uh things that we did where I was a kid that made you know, good memories and whatever
Like I don't I you know, I don't like to claim to anything right? So I just don't know but um, yeah
One of my grandmas had a decline through
dementia
Alzheimer's I think when I think when she started to decline
She actually like from what I gathered she actually sort of pulled back out of your life and stopped trying to initiate
(21:25):
Contact
Like no, it wasn't even like she didn't she didn't initiate contact with anybody everybody went to her
Right. Well, I mean, that's what I mean. I think she once she started declining. She didn't want to initiate contact
She just kind of wanted to fade out of everybody's life because she didn't want to initiate contact
She wanted to fade out of everybody's life because like
(21:47):
That's what that's what older people tend to do. My grandpa did that same thing
They just they're just like it hurts other people less if I pull back in this story
This was somebody I don't know that she like meant she wouldn't try to pull back because it I think it it happened
Over a much shorter period of time than what you experienced
(22:08):
Yeah, but like these were grown adults already
By the time she even got the diagnosis and so they were already they had such a bond already formed
That like they couldn't let her fade into the distance and that like you can feel that
Through the whole reading of the article
(22:29):
Yeah, absolutely and um, it goes it goes very in depth into like what was required to
care the best that they could for their mother in
a situation where the the brain is not
relaying
The same types of information anymore. And one thing I really liked about this is that it it kept itself
(22:54):
right before the line of going too far into vulnerability
by
touching on the traumatic things
In such a way that if you had experienced them, you'd know exactly what he was talking about
But if you hadn't you weren't traumatized by it. Does that make sense?
Yeah, yeah
(23:15):
It was really just masterful as far as vulnerability goes I I have no notes
Right, absolutely
And it was just
It was it was an expression of what it was like to be a loved one of that experience and almost like a
(23:37):
An honoring of his mother and it was just it was it was great. It was wonderful. Yeah, go check it out. Yeah
Yeah, I'd have to say no offense to any of the other writers that we've mentioned
This one
Is probably my favorite of this this episode?
Yeah, just because of the impact that it had with every single word. It's just marvelous
(24:05):
Okay, uh you're ready to move on to the last one
Yeah, I feel like we could have we could have spent more time on it, but it's so I mean like yeah
It's hard to know what else to say about it. Honestly, this one's this one is hard to go more in depth
Because we're both just kind of like just go read it like we can't possibly say
(24:26):
Anything better than what he has already said
Yep, it's it's just difficult to say more because he's already put it out there in the right way
like
10 out of 10, you know
Yeah
So do you mind if I introduce the next one? Sure. Go ahead
(24:48):
Um
So, uh, this next one is by molly davies and uh, I found this author because
they recently
Checked out my stuff and I was just kind of like interested into people that had recently checked me out and looking and like
Whatever the word it's not subscribed here. Is it it's just followed. It's just follow
(25:13):
Yeah, yeah, and like uh, they get subscribed to your email
Well, actually, yeah, this person subscribed to my email
So I checked them out just to see what they had written. I knew surge was gonna say something about that
I check you out every day mortal wink wink. Hell yeah
so, um, but yeah, I just went to check check this person out, um along with a couple of others and like
(25:36):
and I ran into a what I thought was
Um a very interesting, uh
description of an experience that she had
at the beach
and
I don't know help me out. I'm kind of running this team
so
I don't know the other two
It's pretty obvious like where the loss is but this one the loss is implicit and it's implicit in a way
(26:03):
Where it it isn't really there
Because like it's it's this great story about um, and she she goes into like
Details that that really helped bring it alive of her being on the beach
And then stepping on something and then this pain just shooting through her leg that she has never felt before
(26:23):
And the fact that she's had multiple jellyfish stings and this was not that
And like, you know went through that and the experience of you know, the lifeguard coming in and out everything
There was one thing I felt that was missing from making this
The best story that it could be and that was that moment that I can almost guarantee that I know she had
(26:46):
While she was experiencing that horrible pain where she was thinking in her mind
Am I going to lose my leg? Is this something that is actually hurting me? Am I going to die?
I don't know which thoughts or or all of the thoughts but some thoughts about
What she was going to physically lose from having this experience?
I can almost guarantee she had something of that nature in there
(27:10):
And it wasn't it wasn't part of the story
Right because she was really good at at really showing us the feeling of like i've felt pain before
And i've gotten through it and I feel confident that I can get through anything
But this experience is giving me fear this experience is more than I expected and more than I feel like I can handle
(27:31):
But you know the what will this do to me was just the step that we didn't take and that's you know
Every writer writes their own story. It doesn't but but like but that one additional step of that like
How it how it penetrated the fear parts of us is that vulnerable bit that will
(27:52):
Have a reader potentially in tears, you know what I mean? Right?
Well or at least that they can relate to it enough to to be internally nodding and having
Some emotional connection to an experience that they had
And that's where I find that the the loss the loss of stating, you know her
(28:13):
Feelings about what she might lose as a result of this
That was the what I what I felt was the connective bridge to people that maybe they haven't been to a beach ever
Or maybe they've never hurt themselves on a beach. So they don't really
They don't really relate to this but everybody has had that moment where they've
They've experienced such dramatic pain that they have those thoughts in their head of like what's going to happen?
(28:38):
What is happening to me now and what is going to happen from this in the future?
Everybody's had something like that. And so that was something that I felt could bridge to
more people that
They were reading her story and were in captured and raptured by her experience, but they weren't
Potentially weren't connecting to it from their own experiences that one one tiny addition
(29:02):
Could bring them in and just rope them in for the long haul too
But other than that other than that one thing it was a fantastic story
And we're ending on it because it has such a light-hearted
note to it that
Like it just leaves you feeling better for having read it
Right. Absolutely. And with that, you know implied sense of loss that ultimately
(29:27):
I mean, I don't want to ruin the story. So maybe I won't go into any further detail, but you know
But yeah, that's that's what really helped us to round this out because we got really really deep for the first two
You know, right like really really vulnerable. And so it's nice to
Have an experience that like has an immediate
Sort of emotion attached to it, but it's not something that's impactful over the long haul
(29:50):
You know, this is a this is now just a nice story. The pain
Is in the past does that make sense? Right and I I want to reiterate like I don't want it to sound like i'm just kind
Of ragging on this story. This story had me
From the first line to the end
This this this story was
(30:11):
very
Very good
in my opinion
But like we we included it in here because I I was like well
It's missing the loss. It's missing the element of being afraid of losing something
From the the pain and that one thing is like the only thing I would really change about it
(30:33):
Yeah
Not that it has to have that element to it
I'm not an expert or anything, but that's how it's like
I'm not an expert or anything, but that's how it that's how it fits into the theme. See we've come full circle
Full circle. Absolutely
And having a perspective doesn't mean you're you know, trying to override someone else. No, no, no, no
(30:54):
And I will say I think this was the first article that I like
Yeah, you brought this one we talked about
And i'm like so nervous now like honestly like I I didn't expect to be so nervous about about that
Like I hope I did. Okay, honestly
Isn't it hard? Isn't it hard bringing the article that you found and being like hey everybody look
(31:18):
Look, this is the thing that I found. Is it okay? Does it fit? Is it okay what I said about it?
Yeah, you the more you do it the the less that fear really overwhelms or anything but
I get it
Totally get it
Right on cool
(31:41):
Hot hot dog and whatever you know
Just we'll go here at some point in the near future. I I need to come up with some like
better promo
Stuff to say on the podcast be a little more professional sounding about it for right now
All I've got is go to the monster alley.com
(32:03):
And that's what I that's what I got
Yeah, and when you get there you can check out
I think you can check out the medium articles, right?
You can also check out the sub stack and I think there's even the buy me a coffee stuff on there or whatever
It's called now, right?
Yeah, I don't actually have a direct link from the website to the articles that we talk about
(32:27):
I guess that's something I should probably figure out
Whoops
Yeah, I know but that's no that's something that's a great idea. I didn't even think about it
That's maybe by the time this comes out. Maybe I will be able to add it
Maybe yeah, I'll work on it
I i'm not promising anything but I will work on it and we'll we'll see what I can pump out
(32:53):
Yeah, and you know what? I'm gonna bring something else up just because you know
We do a vulnerable podcast and I think that I can include transparency in that. Yeah
I don't know if we ever said anything out loud, but we're releasing these
These episodes now on the Monday after we record we record on a Thursday
We release them on a Monday and that's just to give us time to not be overwhelmed with trying to get shit done so quickly
(33:15):
Yeah, we were trying to just get it out as quickly as possible
Like at first I think we were just like recording it on Thursday and then uploading it on Thursday
and then uploading it on Thursday and then we went from
uploading it Thursday to Friday and then
A lot of stuff was happening with you and you were like, I just don't know that I could do it that quickly
(33:38):
And so we did it like this Saturday sometimes Sunday business
Now we're just like, you know what? We're just gonna say flat Monday
Whatever whatever speed we need to take it at that's plenty of time for us to do what we need to do to get it finalized
Right and maybe listening us to be listening to us be a couple of doofuses for an hour ish or so
(34:04):
It might help a Monday feel a little bit less like a Monday if Mondays are onerous to you if you happen to be Garfield
Yeah, because we're bringing that Thursday energy to your Monday
Right like tomorrow's Friday not for you, but for us for us
And you know what the next Friday is right around the corner. It's not that far away
(34:24):
That's true. That's true. Oh and you know for our our lovely friends in chat, uh Sturgeon Ben
It's also Friday tomorrow for them. That's that's also true
So, uh, yeah, how do you how are you feeling about uh
About this being the end of the main episode
I kind of feel like we uh
(34:47):
You know, we did pretty good. I think that we're both a little low energy today
And so maybe it's a little shorter than it's been in the past, but um
I think we covered some good shit and saw some good vulnerability
awesome
Heck yeah
Do you want me to do the whole yeah
Okay, yeah, we start with you
well
(35:08):
Well
Dear listeners slash watcher slash chatter. Uh, i'm eternally mortal
it's been a delight having you here and listening to us talk about some stuff and um
I really hope you find smiles this day
And i'm the accidental monster. You can find us both on medium.com and
(35:29):
Follow yourself always
Hi, I'm Tam and I'm eternally mortal and this is the hidden egg podcast where we talk about vulnerability and
(00:08):
stuff and things and
boobs
Look at the boob look at the boob
Well people that are listening can't look at the boob
But there's this cute little dog on on the chat that starts put up in a gif and it's being booked
And then it leaks the boob and it's adorable
Yeah, you you lick the boob when you're a puppy. That's just the thing. That's just the thing
(00:32):
Okay, so this this this episode
What is this episode six? Yep, we're on episode six of season four
So this episode the theme
What what did we decide the theme was I remember we had a theme actually the theme for this episode is gonna be loss
loss, right
The the articles that Tam and I found this week
(00:55):
We found three pretty powerful articles that we really resonated with and they just all kind of like
Revolved a bit of around the loss
And we also have quite a few shoutouts to do first though
Yes
Yes, we do. So I
(01:15):
Didn't coordinate the order with you. So I guess that's why you really needed the
The screen share, huh? No. No, I just remembered that it was a thing and it wasn't happening and that's all
But yeah, I was gonna let you go in whatever order you want I've got all of them up on my screen
So the first one I'm gonna shout out to Ben Ulansey for his article about what if the aliens think we're dinosaurs
(01:42):
Yeah, it's a perspective shift for some people for me. I like immediately it was like, oh, yeah
I didn't think about that, but that would make perfect sense and had a conversation with him before I even read the article
And he's like, wow, I didn't you just got that from the title like, okay
Well, some people might already have this perspective, but I think the majority of people don't really think about it
(02:05):
So that makes it a really great read. I
Think to shift perspectives
Yeah, it was a really cute conversation and I honestly hadn't come across the article until I saw that conversation
And so I didn't even like I know really get the opportunity to see how long it would take me to take to get it
But sorry reading reading the article was amazing
(02:25):
like it was so well written to lead you through the entirety of the concept of
how I
Want to say perspective that that's not the right word but like relatively not even I don't think relativity is wrong just
Distance just the sheer distance and how it would look to people fought to
(02:46):
Aliens far away to this for this planet. It was it was just so
Well-crafted in my opinion. Well, you kind of gave away the perspective, but that's fine. Oh
Well, okay. Yeah, you're right. It's fine. We'll move on. It's a good article. Go read it
Yeah, then there was this one's this one's the one that I don't think you actually read oh
(03:10):
Yeah, Ben's article is in Sturges pub. I didn't think about that. Is it oh
Yeah, it is in the random nerdiest collective. That's true
Check out that pub check out that pub. So then there's the one
Cristala Rosina and her article the camera never lies. Who are they kidding and
(03:31):
She published it in my pub Monster Cafe and I read it and I just I really enjoyed that perspective
It's another perspective piece where like some of the things that we tape take for granted
like
Particularly what she's talking about is cameras and and whether or not they actually tell you the truth
(03:52):
You know that whole a picture's worth a thousand words and you know
If it happened on camera, then it must be true or whatever
but like there's a lot of stuff you can do with perspective and lighting even before getting to the editing and
She just kind of goes into all of that and is like is it really the worst thing to have some touch-ups in a freaking picture?
(04:13):
That bring out who like what you really look like in person
Yeah, absolutely also Ben's here
We just talked about the
Aliens dinosaurs. Yeah. Okay, cool. Yeah, sorry
(04:35):
So that's why would you assume that there were kind words, I don't understand
But yeah perspective and
Being able to edit your pictures is what you were talking about
And yeah, I think that it's I think that creating what you want to portray to the world is always amazing
That's a form of art. Yeah, you just want to take like a bare photo
That's a different form of art. That's all well
(04:58):
I mean, there's the whole argument about like how much photoshopping is too much and you know that they they take it to an unnatural
degree where our expectations of beauty are like forever scarred and
I'm like, yeah, those things are definitely true and I totally I'm on board with like there is a limit
But I think we need to like as a society kind of agree on what that limit is to me
(05:22):
personally my limit is if
If when I look at the original picture and I look at the dot an altered picture if I feel like I've been lied to
By looking at those two and like they are so different that I can't even see
Like like it feels like a miss representation. That's my line, but that's so subjective
(05:44):
Yeah, it is but you know, that's the way that it's gonna and I guess it's just it's it's like one of those things
You're gonna if you're gonna put yourself out there in a certain regard
You have to expect that some people are gonna want to criticize it because they're just a there's trolls and B
There's just people that haven't really come out of their own perspective in certain regards and get triggered by things
(06:06):
So, you know, I guess it's just gonna happen. Yeah, so it was a phenomenal article also
Not I don't know if it was super vulnerable technically but like, you know
It's still a great article and that's why I wanted to shout it out
and then there was
Ute Luppert's
(06:27):
second
Article so we have two articles by Ute this this episode and we had to choose one because it just
Didn't seem right to have two of them be the main
So this was the kind of the week's runner-up. It's a really it almost like it was almost
(06:47):
difficult to make the decision
But the bestest boy was just just shy of the one we ended up choosing
Which we'll get to later on
But yeah, this one was this one made me feel a lot because it it was so
Caring and understanding like it was so
deep about being there for another entity in a way that
(07:12):
No one has to but it's always beautiful when you are. Does that make sense? Mm-hmm
Yeah, and I like Ute so just you know in in the middle of the shout-out
I'm gonna take this little aside Ute has this
this specific ability in
Her writing that when she's vulnerable, she's not so much vulnerable
(07:34):
about herself as she is vulnerable as a as a sort of voice for her animals
If that makes sense
Right
And portrays from for her animals is so revealing right like she she
Empathizes with her animals and it's that part is very obvious from everything that she writes, but then she like
(07:57):
Translates that into the article and it's a very
Unique kind of vulnerability that I don't see a whole lot
But like I just I just want to point that because like her articles all of them are awesome
But the bestest boy was definitely one that I was like, that's that's that's what her skill is. That's what she does
(08:20):
Right and I want to point out real quick that the main character of this story is Pablo and we're going to
See Pablo again later in the episode
Because I'm gonna mention him that's what I'm saying, you know cool
So and then there's the very last shout out before we get to the actual stuff and that was by Paco Taylor
(08:46):
And it was the 10 most totally traumatizing PG rated movies
That Generation X watched as kids
Yeah, and it was it was a hilarious run through of some really like
Deep and dark movies from like the mid 70s to the early 80s. I'll be honest with you like half of them
(09:10):
I had never either I hadn't heard of them or I just hadn't seen them
So that's okay
Technically you and I are at the very beginning of Gen Y and Millennials and this article was very
Gen X centric. Yes to where I you know
(09:30):
If Paco Taylor is upset that us Millennials are talking about it. I totally understand and we Millennials suck. It's totally true
Yeah, like Sturge says we're kind of Xennials
Yeah, but the definitely a lot of these movies were a little bit more
Before my time in such a way that I didn't I never got to them. They were classics that I've heard of except for one
One was completely new to me
But then other ones weren't really as traumatic to me as was all like honestly. Sorry to call out one specific
(09:57):
But I love the Dark Crystal
I loved the Dark Crystal as a child and yes skeksis were scary as all get out and fuck
But my god that I love the gelflings
Okay, but you do remember that when we were watching it with the intention of sharing it with our child
We realized halfway through the movie. This is not something that is age appropriate for them. I don't I don't think we ever
(10:23):
introduced Kai
to the Dark Crystal
I think that they just kind of lost interest after a certain point and like, you know
Media's
Yeah nowadays, but anyway, yeah, um, it was it was hilarious article though
Like all the way through I was laughing at multiple different points
It was it was delightful and this goes to show what great taste we have and or what great taste
(10:49):
Sturge has that he's read all of these already
Of course one day one day
We will be watching it again
Of course one day one day we will bring an article to you that you have not seen I guarantee it we will
(11:10):
You haven't seen this
No, he hadn't seen this article, but he had seen
Okay, he's seen all the movie. I see I see well then we're already starting he is more cultured than us
way more cultured
I don't you know what? I I just came across Paco recently myself. So
(11:30):
Yeah on the radar now
Yep, and that I believe concludes our shout out that's the shout outs. So now we're on to the first
the first one which is Ute Leppert's is
The the winner of this week's episode not the winner of like all of them
but like out of the two that we had from her this was
(11:52):
This one was definitely more vulnerable they made you cry
I I okay, so a little peek behind the curtain
For some of the articles that we look over for choosing for to talk about on the podcast
I'd like to read some of them out loud if neither one of us had read it yet
and I literally like had to
(12:15):
Stop a couple of times reading this one because the emotions hit me too hard and I couldn't read it
too hard and I couldn't control my voice
um
Yeah, the last couple of paragraphs especially
So this is called grieving pets
subtitle the depth of animal emotions and so you can get a bit of a sense for what it's about and also you could say that
(12:39):
Ute
maybe had a little bit of an advantage or maybe we had a little bit of a bias because we've you know
We've recently lost all of our long-term pets recently in the past couple of years. Let's say and it um,
It's still I mean we we loved our furball creatures dearly and we miss them
Uh so much to this day and so reading about because we they didn't all die at once one died at a time and
(13:05):
I feel terrible talking about it this lightly anyway
um our
Last cat that stayed with us until just about a year ago now. Yeah
We even though he was always kind of aloof in a certain regard what we could tell that he really missed
um you
When you passed and it was I mean just talking about it now is making me kind of fucking cry. So
(13:31):
um
but
so anyway, uh the whole
idea of this article was really really really touching and um,
I was really charmed by the mention of Pablo the the the dog from the previous article that we talked about
Because you know this is talking about all of Ute's pets and how they've reacted to each other as they've passed over the years and
(13:53):
my god is that vulnerable like
the people that have owned pets are
Know we know each other on site in a certain regard
But people that have owned pets long enough for them to pass from old age, especially like that's a that's a whole different level to it
Yeah, because I know a lot of people who have had pets, but then they got rid of them before
(14:13):
the worst started happening
Not usually because they gave up on the animal but because like they had life experiences that
Prevented them from continuing like, you know, they went to college or whatever
And so they'd leave their pets home with their parents and their parents actually went through the loss
While they were, you know halfway across the country or whatever
(14:35):
but
No, yeah, so being actually being there with the pet day to day
And watching the decline and then watching when you have multiple pets what happens to the survivors?
after one passes away like that's
That's a skill. That is something that I don't think
(14:55):
people understand
Like they're affected and they're not affected the way we're affected
They're affected in very different ways and they show it in very different ways and animal to animal. It'll be different
Absolutely, and i'll be honest like when we do
Branch back out into pet ownership
(15:17):
I'm going to look up this article and look at ways to help pets deal with grief
And try and take action in that regard because there was some really amazing like ideas and
Implementations that I was read in this article about helping pets get through grief
And it was I was I was floored honestly
(15:39):
Well, then if that's what you want to do, you know what you you know what you're going to need to to learn how to do right?
No, what make a new list?
What so that you can save this list
In a special or save this article in a special list on medium that you can come back to
And know what it's for
(16:00):
So what you're talking about is being able to retain I got you understood
Yeah, well because like when we were we weren't we were going over these articles
You were I was like, yeah, you could make you know, you can make different lists
And if it's public the mobile one like you kind of gave me this look like
Why would I ever actually make a list? Doesn't it have a list? It's got this one list
Why would I ever need another one? How dare you?
(16:22):
I don't even use the list that's available to me. Yeah, I know I know because
I live so much in the poet in the poet in the moment that I just
Don't even
I'm like if i'm not reading it right now, then there's almost no chance that I read it. So
I haven't I also it's possible that I might you know, go like surge and
(16:47):
Go too crazy with it get too big with it and
Uh go too crazy with it get too big with it. Look, you don't need to go that far just one
Secondary list so that it's it's you know
A separate place and then you can use your regular reading list for things that like are for the podcast or whatever that
(17:07):
That you you you take them off the list and it filters out but have one that's just like i'm just going to put
really good shit in here and
And read it again someday when I think about oh, I want to come back to that article
I I understand what you're talking about. Absolutely. I was going to get a little bit more vulnerable for a minute. Oh, i'm sorry
I'm sorry. No, no, no, don't let me stop you. You didn't stop anything
(17:31):
Sturge feels attacked
I make great use of the list feature on medium you do sturge but see
Not like most people can't read several hundred articles in a day and actually understand what they've said
So like I can't put you as the bar
I uh, I would genuinely feel uh an element of responsibility to everything I added to a list
(17:59):
You're right though that a list of stuff that i've already read that I want to refer back to in the future would probably hold
A lot less of that responsibility on me. Yeah, why I was gonna say
What's the responsibility that it would hold on you if nobody knows that the list exists?
But you like you're the only one that knows that this list even exists
What responsibility would you have to it?
(18:22):
Doing the right thing being a good boy. What's the right thing?
Whatever my internal, uh
Madness tells me is the right thing or maybe whatever my uh,
Inner demon won't yell at me for maybe
So you don't have anything right now that's
The right thing to do
In this moment? Yeah
(18:44):
Just continue the podcast to the best of my ability
That's what this moment is
Okay, gotcha
They're talking about mimosas days. I don't know what mimosas days are. I don't know what that is
Is that a book? Is that a oh it's oh they're a writer. Okay. That's an author. Yeah, I have not seen mimosas days
I'll have to look into them
(19:05):
Because if you're both saying that they're awesome, then obviously they're somebody that I want to know
And read
Yeah, we should definitely check them out
Are you ready? You ready to move on to the next one?
The next one's the hard hitter like you'd think this one was because this this one was pretty deep but uh the next one
Yeah, well uta's
(19:26):
Article was delightful and impactful and I appreciated it so much
So yeah, let's move on I refuse I refuse to maracas that
Specifically because I know ben did it. Okay moving on
So the heavy hitter
Was um by darren weir
(19:46):
I hope i'm saying his name right it could be where I guess
Um, and it's called losing my mom one memory at a time
Helping a loved one through dementia
Yeah, and this is heavy this is absolutely heavy
um because I mean
A lot of people
In the country and in the world have had to deal with um, i've had to live through
(20:12):
A relative having dementia
and
It made me cry too. I read this one aloud as well and I didn't get all the way through it before
My voice broke didn't you have a grandparent that had dementia?
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, and I uh
(20:34):
Look, I read through darren's article here. We read through darren's article and it was um, like you can feel the relationship
Between him and his grandma you can really tell that
Like there was a closeness there that I don't really know that I can say that I felt was
Either of my grandmas to be honest, I I loved them both and you know, I had little nicknames and we had little
(20:56):
Uh things that we did where I was a kid that made you know, good memories and whatever
Like I don't I you know, I don't like to claim to anything right? So I just don't know but um, yeah
One of my grandmas had a decline through
dementia
Alzheimer's I think when I think when she started to decline
She actually like from what I gathered she actually sort of pulled back out of your life and stopped trying to initiate
(21:25):
Contact
Like no, it wasn't even like she didn't she didn't initiate contact with anybody everybody went to her
Right. Well, I mean, that's what I mean. I think she once she started declining. She didn't want to initiate contact
She just kind of wanted to fade out of everybody's life because she didn't want to initiate contact
She wanted to fade out of everybody's life because like
(21:47):
That's what that's what older people tend to do. My grandpa did that same thing
They just they're just like it hurts other people less if I pull back in this story
This was somebody I don't know that she like meant she wouldn't try to pull back because it I think it it happened
Over a much shorter period of time than what you experienced
(22:08):
Yeah, but like these were grown adults already
By the time she even got the diagnosis and so they were already they had such a bond already formed
That like they couldn't let her fade into the distance and that like you can feel that
Through the whole reading of the article
(22:29):
Yeah, absolutely and um, it goes it goes very in depth into like what was required to
care the best that they could for their mother in
a situation where the the brain is not
relaying
The same types of information anymore. And one thing I really liked about this is that it it kept itself
(22:54):
right before the line of going too far into vulnerability
by
touching on the traumatic things
In such a way that if you had experienced them, you'd know exactly what he was talking about
But if you hadn't you weren't traumatized by it. Does that make sense?
Yeah, yeah
(23:15):
It was really just masterful as far as vulnerability goes I I have no notes
Right, absolutely
And it was just
It was it was an expression of what it was like to be a loved one of that experience and almost like a
(23:37):
An honoring of his mother and it was just it was it was great. It was wonderful. Yeah, go check it out. Yeah
Yeah, I'd have to say no offense to any of the other writers that we've mentioned
This one
Is probably my favorite of this this episode?
Yeah, just because of the impact that it had with every single word. It's just marvelous
(24:05):
Okay, uh you're ready to move on to the last one
Yeah, I feel like we could have we could have spent more time on it, but it's so I mean like yeah
It's hard to know what else to say about it. Honestly, this one's this one is hard to go more in depth
Because we're both just kind of like just go read it like we can't possibly say
(24:26):
Anything better than what he has already said
Yep, it's it's just difficult to say more because he's already put it out there in the right way
like
10 out of 10, you know
Yeah
So do you mind if I introduce the next one? Sure. Go ahead
(24:48):
Um
So, uh, this next one is by molly davies and uh, I found this author because
they recently
Checked out my stuff and I was just kind of like interested into people that had recently checked me out and looking and like
Whatever the word it's not subscribed here. Is it it's just followed. It's just follow
(25:13):
Yeah, yeah, and like uh, they get subscribed to your email
Well, actually, yeah, this person subscribed to my email
So I checked them out just to see what they had written. I knew surge was gonna say something about that
I check you out every day mortal wink wink. Hell yeah
so, um, but yeah, I just went to check check this person out, um along with a couple of others and like
(25:36):
and I ran into a what I thought was
Um a very interesting, uh
description of an experience that she had
at the beach
and
I don't know help me out. I'm kind of running this team
so
I don't know the other two
It's pretty obvious like where the loss is but this one the loss is implicit and it's implicit in a way
(26:03):
Where it it isn't really there
Because like it's it's this great story about um, and she she goes into like
Details that that really helped bring it alive of her being on the beach
And then stepping on something and then this pain just shooting through her leg that she has never felt before
(26:23):
And the fact that she's had multiple jellyfish stings and this was not that
And like, you know went through that and the experience of you know, the lifeguard coming in and out everything
There was one thing I felt that was missing from making this
The best story that it could be and that was that moment that I can almost guarantee that I know she had
(26:46):
While she was experiencing that horrible pain where she was thinking in her mind
Am I going to lose my leg? Is this something that is actually hurting me? Am I going to die?
I don't know which thoughts or or all of the thoughts but some thoughts about
What she was going to physically lose from having this experience?
I can almost guarantee she had something of that nature in there
(27:10):
And it wasn't it wasn't part of the story
Right because she was really good at at really showing us the feeling of like i've felt pain before
And i've gotten through it and I feel confident that I can get through anything
But this experience is giving me fear this experience is more than I expected and more than I feel like I can handle
(27:31):
But you know the what will this do to me was just the step that we didn't take and that's you know
Every writer writes their own story. It doesn't but but like but that one additional step of that like
How it how it penetrated the fear parts of us is that vulnerable bit that will
(27:52):
Have a reader potentially in tears, you know what I mean? Right?
Well or at least that they can relate to it enough to to be internally nodding and having
Some emotional connection to an experience that they had
And that's where I find that the the loss the loss of stating, you know her
(28:13):
Feelings about what she might lose as a result of this
That was the what I what I felt was the connective bridge to people that maybe they haven't been to a beach ever
Or maybe they've never hurt themselves on a beach. So they don't really
They don't really relate to this but everybody has had that moment where they've
They've experienced such dramatic pain that they have those thoughts in their head of like what's going to happen?
(28:38):
What is happening to me now and what is going to happen from this in the future?
Everybody's had something like that. And so that was something that I felt could bridge to
more people that
They were reading her story and were in captured and raptured by her experience, but they weren't
Potentially weren't connecting to it from their own experiences that one one tiny addition
(29:02):
Could bring them in and just rope them in for the long haul too
But other than that other than that one thing it was a fantastic story
And we're ending on it because it has such a light-hearted
note to it that
Like it just leaves you feeling better for having read it
Right. Absolutely. And with that, you know implied sense of loss that ultimately
(29:27):
I mean, I don't want to ruin the story. So maybe I won't go into any further detail, but you know
But yeah, that's that's what really helped us to round this out because we got really really deep for the first two
You know, right like really really vulnerable. And so it's nice to
Have an experience that like has an immediate
Sort of emotion attached to it, but it's not something that's impactful over the long haul
(29:50):
You know, this is a this is now just a nice story. The pain
Is in the past does that make sense? Right and I I want to reiterate like I don't want it to sound like i'm just kind
Of ragging on this story. This story had me
From the first line to the end
This this this story was
(30:11):
very
Very good
in my opinion
But like we we included it in here because I I was like well
It's missing the loss. It's missing the element of being afraid of losing something
From the the pain and that one thing is like the only thing I would really change about it
(30:33):
Yeah
Not that it has to have that element to it
I'm not an expert or anything, but that's how it's like
I'm not an expert or anything, but that's how it that's how it fits into the theme. See we've come full circle
Full circle. Absolutely
And having a perspective doesn't mean you're you know, trying to override someone else. No, no, no, no
(30:54):
And I will say I think this was the first article that I like
Yeah, you brought this one we talked about
And i'm like so nervous now like honestly like I I didn't expect to be so nervous about about that
Like I hope I did. Okay, honestly
Isn't it hard? Isn't it hard bringing the article that you found and being like hey everybody look
(31:18):
Look, this is the thing that I found. Is it okay? Does it fit? Is it okay what I said about it?
Yeah, you the more you do it the the less that fear really overwhelms or anything but
I get it
Totally get it
Right on cool
(31:41):
Hot hot dog and whatever you know
Just we'll go here at some point in the near future. I I need to come up with some like
better promo
Stuff to say on the podcast be a little more professional sounding about it for right now
All I've got is go to the monster alley.com
(32:03):
And that's what I that's what I got
Yeah, and when you get there you can check out
I think you can check out the medium articles, right?
You can also check out the sub stack and I think there's even the buy me a coffee stuff on there or whatever
It's called now, right?
Yeah, I don't actually have a direct link from the website to the articles that we talk about
(32:27):
I guess that's something I should probably figure out
Whoops
Yeah, I know but that's no that's something that's a great idea. I didn't even think about it
That's maybe by the time this comes out. Maybe I will be able to add it
Maybe yeah, I'll work on it
I i'm not promising anything but I will work on it and we'll we'll see what I can pump out
(32:53):
Yeah, and you know what? I'm gonna bring something else up just because you know
We do a vulnerable podcast and I think that I can include transparency in that. Yeah
I don't know if we ever said anything out loud, but we're releasing these
These episodes now on the Monday after we record we record on a Thursday
We release them on a Monday and that's just to give us time to not be overwhelmed with trying to get shit done so quickly
(33:15):
Yeah, we were trying to just get it out as quickly as possible
Like at first I think we were just like recording it on Thursday and then uploading it on Thursday
and then uploading it on Thursday and then we went from
uploading it Thursday to Friday and then
A lot of stuff was happening with you and you were like, I just don't know that I could do it that quickly
(33:38):
And so we did it like this Saturday sometimes Sunday business
Now we're just like, you know what? We're just gonna say flat Monday
Whatever whatever speed we need to take it at that's plenty of time for us to do what we need to do to get it finalized
Right and maybe listening us to be listening to us be a couple of doofuses for an hour ish or so
(34:04):
It might help a Monday feel a little bit less like a Monday if Mondays are onerous to you if you happen to be Garfield
Yeah, because we're bringing that Thursday energy to your Monday
Right like tomorrow's Friday not for you, but for us for us
And you know what the next Friday is right around the corner. It's not that far away
(34:24):
That's true. That's true. Oh and you know for our our lovely friends in chat, uh Sturgeon Ben
It's also Friday tomorrow for them. That's that's also true
So, uh, yeah, how do you how are you feeling about uh
About this being the end of the main episode
I kind of feel like we uh
(34:47):
You know, we did pretty good. I think that we're both a little low energy today
And so maybe it's a little shorter than it's been in the past, but um
I think we covered some good shit and saw some good vulnerability
awesome
Heck yeah
Do you want me to do the whole yeah
Okay, yeah, we start with you
well
(35:08):
Well
Dear listeners slash watcher slash chatter. Uh, i'm eternally mortal
it's been a delight having you here and listening to us talk about some stuff and um
I really hope you find smiles this day
And i'm the accidental monster. You can find us both on medium.com and
(35:29):
Follow yourself always
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