S10e10: Our Pre-Process Panel – Before the Process With Regina, Marc, and Jason

Today, we've brought together our Hoffman pre-Process Panel. Hoffman teachers Jason, Marc, Regina, and our host, Drew, share personal and professional insights into how the time leading up to the Hoffman Process solidly prepares you for your week at the Process. Regina offers wisdom on the pattern of perfection and how it doesn't serve you when you come to the Process. Allowing ourselves to be messy in the container of the Process supports the deeper transformation that's possible during the week. Regina calls us to trust the Process, saying, "The moment you commit, it's the opportunity to lean into the edge of Spirit..." Marc talks about the power of choice. Oftentimes, students come to work on something happening in the present. But the work of the Process is to heal the pain of your past, which in turn affects things happening now, because the healing is within you. As Marc shares, at the Process, "You are stepping into your own childhood pain." He goes on to say, "You are choosing that. That is a choice, whether there's resistance, whether you're scared...but you're choosing that on some very, very big level." A compassionate moment comes when Jason shares about the pre-work each student must complete. He mentions how hard it can be to complete the work because often students feel the pain as it is laid out on the page. Jason shares that the "homework is not who you are. It’s a story of what happened to you. And the more information you can get into that, the more connections you can make in that exploration of what happened to you and who you had to become, the greater your awareness will be stepping into the work at your Process." In other words, the homework can lay a powerful foundation for your Process week. And, of course, Regina, Marc, and Jason share more insights, suggestions, and wisdom to help support you as you prepare for your week at the Process. We hope you enjoy this conversation about how your pre-Process time is integral to supporting your transformational week at the Process. Our Pre-Process Panel Regina Louise: Regina Louise holds a Bachelor of Arts in Interdisciplinary Studies from California Institute of Integral Studies. In addition, she holds a Master of Fine Arts in Creative Writing and Writing for the Performative Arts from the University of California, Riverside. Regina has canvassed the U.S. extensively as a national spokesperson and child advocate, and is excited to be a Hoffman teacher! Read more about Regina here. Listen to Regina share her story on The Hoffman Podcast. Marc Kaplan: Marc’s life purpose is to support people in finding and using their authentic voice. In addition to teaching the Hoffman process, Marc is an esteemed music educator, producer, conductor, and coach. He holds a Bachelor of Arts in Music and Political Science from The George Washington University. “The Hoffman methodology is the foundation of my spiritual practice. It helped me discover that I have choices, enabling me to step into my dignity and live my life from a place of love.” When Marc first did the Process in 2011, he envisioned being a father, and now he is one. He lives in Westchester County, NY with his wife and two daughters. Listen to Marc, along with Dan Siegel, on the Hoffman Podcast. Jason Beegle: Jason holds a BA in Psychology from John F. Kennedy University and an MA in Religion from the University of Hawaii. As a certified NLP coach and intuitive healer, he brings a warm, heart-centered presence to the work of transformation. Jason first experienced the Hoffman Process in 2017. It was a profound turning point that deepened his connection to spirit, purpose, and inner freedom. He is devoted to helping others reconnect with their true selves through compassion, presence, and spiritual insight. “Teaching the Process fills me with hope. It’s a sacred privilege to witness people return to themselves with love, truth, and tenderness.”

Episode Transcript

(00:01):
How do I show up in this space
curated
for personal growth
and
do so in my messiness?
Because
messiness
is
the opposite
of perfection. So
being clear that the moment you commit, it's
the opportunity
to lean into the edge of spirit and

(00:24):
commitment
and trust
the process.
Welcome, everybody. My name is Drew Horning, and
this podcast is called Love's Everyday Radius.
It's brought to you by the Hoffman Institute,
and it's stories and anecdotes
and people we interview
about their life post process

(00:45):
and how it lives in the world
radiating love.
Hey. Welcome everybody to the Hoffman Podcast.
So great to have you. We got Regina
Louise here.
Hi, Drew and
Mark
and Jason.
Yes. And we got Mark Kaplan here. What

(01:07):
up, Mark?
Hi, Drew. Hi, Regina.
Hi, Jay. Pleasure to be with you. Jason
Beagle, good to have you.
Good morning, Drew. Morning, Mark. Good to see
you, Regina.
Alright, you all. We have, gathered here on
this fine day
to talk about the pre process experience

(01:28):
and what students
should think about, what they should not do,
just kinda have a wide ranging discussion,
to help students and guide them.
And if you're listening to this and you've
signed up for the process,
but you haven't gone yet,
you're right where you need to be because
this is what we're talking about. How do
we hold these days, weeks, months

(01:51):
leading up to the process?
So let's dig in. Regina,
what maybe one piece of advice might you
offer, one thing that people that have signed
up for the process should think about as
they anticipate their journey? I think
culturally,
and I mean across
all cultural
context,

(02:13):
we as humans are faced with this idea
of perfectionism.
And inherently
in that pattern
lies the danger.
And that danger,
if I may say it poetically,
is
life
or
the experience

(02:33):
masquerading
as
mastery.
I see perfectionism
as
a pattern
that
allows
the person caught in it to engage
in this, as I said,
mastery
as masquerade,

(02:54):
wearing it as a costume.
But it's just fear dressed in haute couture.
Right?
And
the pattern of perfectionism
actually
wears
ambition
like armor and costume,
But underneath that

(03:15):
is a voice
that
might
say things like,
you're only
worthy
when you're number one,
or
it's not perfect, therefore,
you're not enough,
or
how do I show up in this
space curated

(03:36):
for personal growth
and
do so in my messiness because
messiness
is the opposite
of perfection. So
being clear that the moment you commit,
it's
the opportunity
to lean into the edge of spirit

(03:58):
and commitment
and trust
the process.
Beautiful. I I love the idea that part
of what you're saying is the process has
already started,
And don't try and do it perfectly. Whatever
it is, allow the messiness of life and
that masquerade of perfectionism.
Beautiful. Beautiful. Jason, I wanna kick it over

(04:19):
to you. In a way, all three of
you, all four of us, are Hoffman teachers.
But, Jason, you have lots of experience in
enrollment,
and enrollment has such a huge role
in helping students get ready for the process.
What are some of the key things that
listeners should think about leading up to their
process? Great question, Drew. You touched on the

(04:42):
topic of fear a little bit. And students
coming into the work, really not for sure
what they're stepping into,
often get confronted with fear.
And that fear can sometimes drive them to
leave or not show up. And the one
of the important things to know is that
that fear is normal and really just to
be open and curious to what's unfolding for

(05:02):
you. You You know, as Regina mentioned, the
process begins when you pay the deposit and
get enrolled in a course, whether it's conscious
or not. The best way to get through
those hurdles or obstacles is really reaching out
to the enrollment team and and asking for
support when you need it and asking questions
and being curious and just staying open as
the best ways to really step into it.
What does the enrollment team wanna make sure

(05:24):
people do
on a, like, a check the boxes kind
of approach preprocess?
Yeah. Well, when someone gets registered, the most
important thing to do is fill out the
enrollment forms, items one through four on the
checklist.
It lets the team know if there's anything
they need to do to provide special support
or accommodations for anybody in particular.
And from that point, it's just really important

(05:44):
to stay in communication. You know, do the
prework, which is a pretty hefty load, about
eight to ten hours of exploration of negative
love. And it can bring up some tender
moments, some difficult moments, but really just diving
into it head first and trusting that there's
somebody on the other side to be there
to support and guide you. Beautiful. Beautiful. Mark,

(06:04):
I wanna ask you, what are some, like,
no goes, no fly zone? What should people
not do maybe leading up to the process?
Stay up all week thinking that all of
a sudden on the night that you arrive
at the process, all of a sudden you'll
get the sleep that that it is that
you're looking for. Or there can be some
admonitions

(06:24):
around
or some belief things or some internal voice
around, oh, I'm coming to the process, so
this is how I'll behave after the process.
So I'll just do this one more time,
or I'll really
schedule my week super hard going into
this deep exploration.
So I think a big no go of

(06:45):
that week is, well, of course, some things
are gonna happen, some things are gonna occur
that week.
That week really needs to be about allowance
allowance of of feelings, allowance to actually to
begin the exploration
of what the person's stepping into. So any
denial of that, I'm gonna play it really
big that week, or I'm gonna really push

(07:07):
my nervous system to the brink, to the
limit.
Anything around that in terms of whether it's
sleep or behavior,
I would say you are choosing to step
into this week and how you choose to
behave your ways of being the week before.
Choosing those behaviors are gonna help really set
you up to how you wanna step into

(07:28):
the process, or they're also gonna contribute to
what a potential
few days of nervous system settling. So I
guess
in a way of saying not so much
what you shouldn't do, but really give yourself
the opportunity for is to allow for your
nervous system to be where it is that
week and to really

(07:48):
tune in with it and check with it
as opposed
to overpushing it or pushing it really hard
to the brink. Allow for it to actually
begin that exploration
that week. Regina, I wanna bring you in
here
and ask because, you know, the post process
weekend is important. We do have a podcast
on the post process,

(08:10):
but
one has to make plans
for what they're gonna do post process.
That needs to be done
preprocess.
So
let's all jump in on this. But, Regina,
why don't you start? What are the things
that people should do preprocess to prep for
their
integration weekend afterward?

(08:32):
Beautiful question.
Again,
I ended with trust,
and I'll begin with that
same concept.
It's important,
which I imagine you have already covered,
to
suspend
disbelief
that

(08:52):
you know
what's best for you
the two days post process.
It's important
because
having plans set up, oh, I'm going to
leave on Saturday, I've got this.
Or you know what? I live alone. I've
got this.
It's important

(09:14):
that if you're going to trust us for
seven days
for a multitude of experiences
curated
to
support you to reclaim your innocence,
your preciousness, your humanity.
Also,
trust that when we say you need those
two days, as Mark just said about the

(09:36):
nervous system, all the nervous system wants to
do is bring all of us home. Those
two days post process
are meant for that.
So much sedimentation
has been stirred.
There is no way to know when you're
in such an altered state
the type of magic that is afoot. And

(09:57):
it's in those two days post process
that
the emotions,
the spirit, the body, the intellect, they get
to
metabolize.
And I think metabolization
is the key
here.
And
one gets to be both observer and observed
in that time.

(10:18):
Right?
Be with
the being
that was just excavated
from the patterns. It's a time for deliciousness
afoot.
Right, fellas?
Part of why we're having this conversation with
you now as the listener is is that
all of what we're talking about here is

(10:40):
something that you need to plan for.
Don't
think of going home on Friday. Don't get
on the plane. Mark, what else?
In the same way, I just wanna dovetail
off of Regina in that metabolization.
In the same way that the week prior
to the process
is an entryway into the process.
The two days after the process is a

(11:02):
nice little coda. It's an outro. It's an
extension
of the seven days of being on-site. And
to put a little plug in for another
podcast episode, Dan Siegel actually speaks
on his podcast episode of the deep importance
of that time for integration of that newness,
that unknown, that, you know, as Regina said,

(11:24):
being with that being, being with that newness,
being with that rawness.
Just a little personal self disclosure.
After my process in 02/2011,
I could not speak.
I legitimately
could not speak in the best possible way.
And I had thought going into it, oh,
I'm gonna be energized, and I can't wait

(11:46):
to take on so much.
And while that was for sure the case,
it did not necessarily happen. As Regina said,
be willing to trust. You might not necessarily
know
what those two days will look like, so
be willing to explore.
Those two days post process for me were
essential
to get to explore

(12:07):
myself, to learn
what I loved and cared about and valued
in that moment. It really gave the two
days post not only as an extension of
the week, but they give the person
an ability to try on
some of that newness, some of that unknown
without having to be anything for anybody else.

(12:29):
It's just the ability
and the opportunity
to go inward. And those who don't give
them the opportunity to go inward,
go without.
We'll put a link to that episode with
Dan Siegel in the show notes, and anything
else we talk about here will also add
to the show notes.
But on a practical level, part of what

(12:51):
this means is reserve the time,
set up a place where you can stay,
make that reservation
at a hotel or some sort of place
where you have a chance to do
part of what we're talking about here.
I wanna get Jason in here one more
time before I bring you back, Regina. Jason,
what would you add to this? You know,

(13:12):
a couple of things, the metabolizing and the
being are are two of the most important
parts of those two days. But oftentimes,
students will say, well, I live alone. Is
it okay to go home and be by
myself there? And
what people don't understand is there's
often unconscious triggers in our home environments that
take us outside of ourselves.
And, you know, this week's work is about

(13:33):
coming home to yourself and being with you.
So really building
into your itinerary somewhere with a neutral environment
with access to nature
to really allow you the expansiveness you need
to be with yourself for the first time
maybe in forever.
So there really is a
a sacred tone to these two days, although
it's dictated by you what that looks like.

(13:55):
Really just planning on that and understanding that
even the people we love and the things
we love take us outside of ourselves, and
it's really important to not allow that to
happen those two days.
Thank you. Yeah. You would think, well, I'm
alone.
Isn't it the same as being at a
hotel or retreat site? It's not because it's

(14:16):
old and all those old triggers. That's a
great point. Regina, what would you add here?
Right. And just to
dovetail off of everything
everyone has said,
spirit just pulled on my ear and asked
me to share that
we're talking about boundaries

(14:37):
here. And to Jason's point,
boundaries that
many people have never
experienced
before.
The boundary of the intellect,
the boundaries of the soma, the body, again,
the boundaries of the emotional
self,
who although has matured,

(15:00):
this is new territory.
This is a new frontier
of self fame.
And then
in many cases the first time awareness
that the spiritual
self
is
you.
That in and of itself
demands
a certain kind of sacred

(15:23):
solitude.
A certain and sacred
kind of
quieting
into these aspects. So
the biggest takeaway would be
honoring
the boundaries
of the quadrinity
as well as the boundaries

(15:44):
of self.
You'll learn more if you haven't taken the
process yet about this quadrinity,
and that is Bob, in part, reading Bob
Hoffman's personal path to freedom and love,
bringing a childhood photo. Don't forget that. Bringing
your mementos
for your mom and your dad. That checklist

(16:06):
is important, Jason. I just wanna touch on
the mementos and photos, Drew, because sometimes they're
not accessible
or you can't don't have one. And it's
an invitation
to invite a little creativity,
and it sometimes could be something as simple
as drawing a picture
or ripping out a magazine ad or an
article to
bring back or bring to your attention a

(16:27):
tender moment with mother or father. So it
doesn't have to be a family heirloom or
something worth a lot of money or value.
It's just meant to be, like, an anchor
of love. Mark, what else would you add
here?
The mementos, the childhood photo,
really used to evoke memory,
evoke that memory, evoke that felt sense also

(16:47):
somatically.
And so going back to kinda where we
started, what necessarily not to do that first
week is a lot of efforting, a lot
of, oh, I have to have this item
or I need to find
this picture. I need to make sure. And
then going back to what Regina said about
perfectionism.
Like, it does not have to be perfect
that what you have, what you bring, what

(17:09):
is there for you is actually not only
more than enough, but allow for that to
be resonant in that moment for you around
that photo, around those mementos the week before.
And whatever
you don't bring,
whatever comes up in the process can be
addressed. Just notice the amount of efforting
that week in doing as opposed to the

(17:31):
allowance of who you are, what you have
at your disposal,
and what you'll bring is more than enough.
And when new things come up in the
process,
we'll be able to address it for you.
Beautiful.
Regina.
I would like to offer
another perspective,

(17:51):
and I am intentionally calming
my voice,
slowing it down.
Because I want to speak to the people
who may have nothing.
No
ephemera,
no
positive
memories.
They may not even have

(18:12):
a photo
of themselves between
birth and 12 years old, and I happen
to have been
one of these people.
I just want to say,
it's okay.
And I'll say it again.
It means nothing
about you

(18:32):
if you don't have memories
of baseball mitts
or your mother's favorite recipes
or even the apron
she used to bake you
your favorite
childhood
birthday cakes.
I want to normalize

(18:53):
for those of you, for us,
who
were bereft
of these
idyllic
childhood
ephemeral moments.
It's okay.
You're okay.
And all of you
is welcome.
And your teacher,

(19:14):
we
will walk alongside you and normalize
this for you as best we can
for as willing
as you are to lean in.
What Regina shared just now was really beautiful
and touching, and thank you for for that,
Regina. It called something up for me
around

(19:35):
being able to parent yourself for the first
time and give that little child inside of
you the love,
the tenderness,
the touch
that you always create as a little kid.
That's one of the outcomes of this work
is being able to have that source of
love inside of yourself
come through.
You don't need to have any

(19:55):
idea of what that looked like when you
get here.
It's okay to come in with a blank
slate.
Because as Regina said, we'll walk beside you
as you go home to yourself and learn
how to love that part of you that
yearned for you so long.
And, Mark? I think what what's coming up
for me now is
since this is also about, you know, what
that week before looks like, you've already filled

(20:17):
out all of this preprocess work.
So you've already done good amount of exploring
into your past, a good exploring into what's
coming up for you. And so just
in this moment,
you've done enough.
You have done
enough to allow yourself to and you're choosing
to come. It's like that's the other thing.

(20:37):
You're making the choice to step into this
for yourself to to really so to just
allow,
you know, in the best way that you
can. And that word,
who knows how it lands for you if
you haven't come to the process and and
what you're hearing from it in this moment.
The allowance
of that you have done enough, you are
enough,

(20:58):
that you are willing to choose to step
into this exploration
into yourself and to really
let that be enough.
In some ways, there's really nothing
to do other than that. The only other
thing I'll say is to give yourself the
best
opportunity to be able to step into the
process,
you know, knowing that the logistics, the things

(21:20):
that you are leaving behind
for that week, whether it is your work
or a pet or family,
you know, whatever
you need to do to resource yourself
so that you can step into the fullness
of that exploration for that gift for you
knowing that what you're leaving behind for that
week
is entrusted to either other people if you

(21:42):
can, but that you don't have to think
about that as much while you're there, that
you can really give yourself the gift of
really being with yourself because this week is
for you. This week is really for you.
You know, when I hear the three of
you talk, I'm struck by this
notion that
even before you decided to sign up, the

(22:02):
process had begun.
And when you signed up,
the process is
in place. And you're in the process now
as you listen to this before
you've stepped on to the site.
And, just holding that
it's all
in
process.

(22:22):
You're on your way
even though you haven't started the actual experience.
And to be curious and open to all
of what's happening
even though you may not be on-site yet.
Jason, what else would you like to add
about,
the prework? Mark mentioned the importance of the
prework,

(22:43):
and that prework is no joke. That's a
lot. There are a lot of pages there.
Jump in here. It can be an intense
experience, Drew. It's an awareness tool. And, you
know, oftentimes,
students bulk at the
the requested information or the questions asked
because it sometimes can be painful
or heartbreaking
or whatever else fits in that circle of

(23:05):
emotions.
But what's important to know is that homework
is not who you
are. It's a story of what happened to
you.
And the more information you can get into
that, the more connections you can make in
that exploration of what happened to you and
who you had to become,
the greater your awareness will be stepping into
the work of your process.
If I could stress anything as being really

(23:26):
important in the preparation, the prework is the
absolute most potent tool of awareness you can
step into before coming to your process.
Beautiful. Regina, do you remember your pre work?
We all sort of remember ours, but what
might you add there?
I want to dovetail
of something
that

(23:47):
Jason said,
and
I think it also
speaks to something
that Mark said about
being enough.
Heartbreak.
To sit
with the homework
preprocess

(24:07):
is to sit with the prospect
that you are enough
as you are. Because to sit
with
that in your own dignity
is the work
in process.
And it's so important

(24:28):
to do it, do it alone,
be with you,
excavate,
using curiosity
as the pickaxe to take you to the
next and the next and the next
to become
both
warden
and freer
from your own imprisonment,

(24:48):
to prepare
to go
into the heartbreak.
You're already sitting in sacred waters in that
pre work.
You're already
sitting,
I'll say it again, in sacred
waters.
You're already
stripping away
the noise.

(25:08):
You're already
preparing your place
amongst
spiritual,
emotional
seekers and healers and
curious ones,
and it's about being just you.
You're bruised.
You come in with your bruises, maybe,

(25:29):
but brave.
Right?
You're coming with your hurt. Oh, I'm about
to cry.
But your hurt is holy.
So this is the week
to prepare
for some of the holiest
of the holy.
Thank you for that, Regina.

(25:50):
And in this moment, I want us to
speak to the people who are coming to
address something that's in the present in their
lives. Some people who you're coming to address
that current relationship or you're coming to address
what's happening at work or you're coming to
address something with your kids or you're coming
to address something that's happening
in this moment,
another thing to really lean into

(26:12):
into that holy hurt that Regina just spoke
about is
you are preparing in some way,
you know, to step into that childhood pain,
especially those first few days
in the process. While there are things that
you might want to address in the present
to give yourself the permission that we start
back when you are little, when you are

(26:34):
young, and to know, to also trust that
whatever's happening for you in the present will
be addressed.
You are stepping into your own childhood hurt.
You are stepping into your own childhood pain.
You are stepping into
what it was really like to be a
kid in your
family system, whatever that family system looked like.

(26:55):
So that is another thing for that week
above and that you are choosing that. That
is a
choice. Whether there's resistance, whether you're scared, whether
you don't know,
who knows, but you're choosing that on some
very, very big level.
Beautiful. Thank you, Mark. Thank you, Regina.
Thank you, Jason.
And thank you all for listening. And,

(27:17):
we wish you nothing but the best as
you head into this
beautiful experience called the Hoffman process.
Thank you all. I'm super grateful for your
insights, your reflections. I feel your passion
for this place that you teach, for the
stewardship
that you provide
the students as they go through this wild

(27:38):
experience.
And I want the world to know that
Jason Beagle, I feel very touched,
is
our
newest
teacher. And for
him to be here and for me to
be here with him,
breaking bread is actually holy.

(27:58):
Congratulations,
Jason, and welcome
to the work of your life.
Love you, Regina. Thank you.
I love being with you all. And it's
an honor to do this work, and it's
an honor to support each human being stepping
into it. So
much love.
Congratulations, Jason. And, yes, to everyone coming,
we welcome you. You belong. And it's been

(28:20):
really an honor to be here with the
three of you this morning. The four of
us I don't remember the last time the
four of us were in
the same place or the same area or
when the four of us had a conversation
together quite like this. So I'm deeply grateful
to have had the opportunity to be here
with all of you and to learn and
and and to also share.
Oh, love you. Love you, team. Love you,

(28:42):
guys. Bye, Drew.
Love you, guys.
Bye, Drew.
Thank you for listening to our podcast. My
name is Liza Ingrassi. I'm the CEO and
president of Hoffman Institute Foundation.
And I'm Razi Ingrassi,

(29:03):
Hoffman teacher and founder of the Hoffman Institute
Foundation.
Our mission is to provide people greater access
to the wisdom and power of love. In
themselves,
in each other and in the world. To
find out more, please go to hoffmaninstitute.org.